Ahirarothember: I'm sorry i missed your review, thank you so much. I hope you're enjoying these chapters as well.
AnonGuest: Please play the game, it is lots of fun. I'm so happy I've been a good experience and I'm thankful for you taking the chance on my little ramblings.
GabbyLane: I know what happens and I'm still invested! I love these characters, they bring me so much joy and I hope they bring you as much love as they do for me. There's a lot more to come and I hope you enjoy it.
A/N: I have no idea what I've written, this is a late night update and I'm running on fumes. Apologies if there's some wrong bits.
Chapter 22: Am I in love?
'Oh, Yoba,' Rina said in a heavy exhale as the train sped along the tracks, 'I'm so ready to be home,' she sighed happily and stretched out her legs under the table. Luckily the train wasn't crowded and so they had managed to find a table to themselves. There weren't many passing through to Pelican town. She looked over at Sebastian who was on his phone, 'Bastian,' she said softly. Then she had to repeat his name louder a couple more times until she physically gave him a nudge. 'Oi! Bastian.'
'Hmm? What?' He said and jumped before he looked over at her. 'Oh, sorry, Pheebs. I was just reading some emails,' Sebastian put down his phone and breathed out heavily, 'what were you saying?'
She shook her head, 'I was just saying that I couldn't wait to be home, Bastian,' she repeated as she looked back out the window and tapped her fingers on the table. Sebastian hadn't told Rina about her father visiting him at his hotel room, he didn't want to worry her more than she was; naturally her father had risen as a topic of conversation during her stay in the hospital and the panic it caused her cemented his decision. Sebastian was sure that it wouldn't help her mental recovery, she was already feeling tense enough about returning.
They also hadn't spoken about the kiss and seeing as he already felt guilty about it, he had decided that he wouldn't mention it unless she did; he didn't want her to feel pressured to emotionally confront it. Deep down, he knew it was a cowardly thing to do but the last month had been mentally draining on them both.
'It has been a while since you were home,' Sebastian agrees, making himself more comfortable, sinking into his chair a little more.
'What were you looking up?' She asks in curiosity.
'Just some reports about the damage to your fuse box,' he admitted. There were conflicting theories over what happened and after the meeting with Gideon, Sebastian had a few of his own that worried him.
'Oh… yeah, that,' she said quietly, her body tensing as she thought about it.
'Pheebs,' he said softly as he reached over and rook her hand in his, 'you were so… scared. Hell, I got the phone call and I was terrified… I just… want you to be safe so I'm trying to cover all my bases here,' he said quietly as he looked at his phone. Quite often Rina would wake from a nightmare and would be shaking. After that, she would then spent a couple of hours just wanting to be held and comforted, scared to sleep. She sighed and nodded and he then squeezed her fingers until she looked over him, 'Pheebs,' he said as she sniffed. 'I'm not going anywhere unless I know you're safe.'
Rina nodded and leaned her head on his shoulder, 'I know. I do… it's just strange going home after all this time in hospital. I've gotten lazy,' she joked lightly and bit her lip. 'And you're sure that the farm has been alright while I've been gone?'
He chuckled and brushed back her hair a little as he rolled his eyes and answered the same question that she had practically asked every day. 'Maru has Mochi and he's still grumpy and smells slightly of salt. Your animals have been looked after by Marnie and Jas, she's enjoyed feeding and collecting the chicken and duck eggs. Also, she's come rather attached to one of the rabbits you have,' he smiled. 'They've been selling the eggs and wool from your sheep, Marnie tried to make some mayonnaise but it didn't work out great. They harvested your vegetables and the fruit from your trees, I suggested putting it into your… pickle tubs? So, there should be jam and things ready for when you get home. I' m sorry, Pheebs, I'm no good at the farm lingo,' he sighed. Rina giggled and he continued, 'so, Demetrius has experimented with some solar power and so your red-light generator has a main power supply, back-up generator on a separate board and a solar battery,' he explained. 'Also, mum has been working on a cellar for you, with a… panic space. Should anything like that happen again,' he added quietly.
'I don't really want to think about that,' she mumbled and he nodded. 'Let's talk about happier things, like, while you were in the city did you look for a place?'
Sebastian breathed in deeply, there was news on that front. 'Yeah… about that. I found a place and there's this little start up that wants someone to write some code. It would be a nice little side gig along with my freelance. They even have some rented office space and want me in a couple times a week instead of just having me as a silent colleague,' he explained.
Rina gasped and hugged him tightly from the side, 'Bastian! That's amazing! Honestly, that's really great! I'm so happy for you! You're going to be so amazing, oh, Yoba!' She praised. The idea of him leaving weighed heavy on her heart; we've not spoken about what happened… though it's entirely possible I could have literally dreamt the entire thing. So many drugs, she thought.
It was a bittersweet feeling, thinking that they could have shared something so intimate but Rina wasn't going to risk her friendship by talking about something that could literally have not happened. If had happened and Sebastian wanted to talk about it then she would be more than happy to engage the topic. Until then, she wasn't going to potentially rain on his life plans and change his idea about moving. Rina smiles brightly at him and continues to chatter, 'I could literally come visit you in the city and we could go out for lunch and things,' she babbled happily as she thought about it more and more.
He nodded and laughed half-heartedly, 'yeah, I suppose. I mean, I thought I would feel excited to be finally going to the city but uh… I don't know,' he said honestly. Intently ignoring the real reason, he didn't want to go and shoving the feelings deep.
'Reality is a scary thing, especially when it's something that we want. Always worried that it's not going to live up expectations. The anxiety and fear when I first moved here, I honestly thought I would wet myself,' she replied. 'You're going to be wonderful. I'll miss you, obviously, but we'll chat all the time and any spare time I have, I'll come see you and you have your bike so you can come visiting your mum,' Rina mused. 'I'm proud of you, you better be proud of yourself.'
Sebastian shrugged his shoulders and so Rina pestered him until he admitted that he was a little proud of himself. 'So, what are you going to do when you get home? Apart from checking on the farm and all that,' he said before she could answer with that predictable reply.
'Hmm, I think I'm going to take a long bath now that my stitches are basically gone and then wear my comfiest pyjamas, make some popcorn and lounge in bed with a really good film,' she said honestly. He could tell that she was anxious by the way that her leg jiggled up and down with restless energy. 'Um, so it's going to uh, going to be my first night back since all those monsters,' she whispered and the grip on his hand tightened. 'I understand if you want some space-'
'Want me to stay over tonight?' He asked bluntly.
'Would you mind?'
Sebastian laughed and shook his head, 'Pheebs, we're honest with each other when it comes to socialisation limits. I'll let you know if I'm sick of you-'
'Hey!' She said playfully offended. 'I worry! You've been looking after me all this time in hospital, it's been weeks and you've not really had room to breathe. I know that you're too kind to actually put your own needs first,' she pointed out.
'Sounds like someone else I know,' he retorted, making her roll her eyes in reply. 'Honestly, though, Pheebs. Spending time with you is actually… effortless,' he said simply. 'I'll stay over tonight, it'll be fun. I am gonna spend a couple hours at home first though, I need to sort out my room and I'll make sure to bring Mochi back with me. No doubt the little bugger has been sleeping on my bed,' he laughed lightly.
Next stop is Pelican town. Next stop is Pelican town. Please be careful when disembarking. Please, mind the gap and take all personal belongings.
Rina smiled at Sebastian and they began to gather their stuff, Thankfully, there wasn't much, just a couple of backpacks. She went to pick up her bag and Sebastian gave her a look as he swung it onto his own shoulder. 'Your back doesn't need any extra pressure or weight, I can carry a bag of clothes,' he said ignoring her dirty look. She hated being treated like an invalid and being in hospital hadn't helped that feeling. 'I'll let you carry it later,' he teased, making her roll her eyes in reply. Rina huffed but let him carry it as the train slowed and they stepped off onto the platform. When she looked over at Sebastian, he was wearing a massive grin, that he was unsuccessfully trying to hide.
'What's going on?' She asked suspiciously as she raised a brow and turned to look at him properly.
'Nothing,' he said shrugging a shoulder.
Rina rolled her eyes and gave him a scrutinising look, 'you're getting a beard,' she replied with a cheeky grin. Sebastian took her by the shoulders as the train began to move. He steered her backwards carefully and once the train had completely left the station, he turned her around to see.
'SURPRISE!'
She gasped and yelped as she covered her mouth in shock. 'Oh Yoba!' There was Penny, Emily, Sam, Maru and Alex, all waiting for her with a sign and with a loud couple of bangs, some party poppers went off. 'You guys!' She said as tears began to well up in her eyes. Rina back at Sebastian, 'you knew about this?'
'I may… have kept Maru updated with our location,' he said with a smirk. Rina shook her head and gave him a hug before she ran over to Maru and the others to greet them.
'Rina, we missed you!' Emily squealed as she hugged her tightly. Rina was passed around and happily gave them all attention, she had missed her friends dearly and there was only so much that talking on the phone would do. 'Come on, we're gonna miss the festival if we don't hurry!'
Sebastian smiled and thanked Maru when he got a moment as they were dragged down from the train station through the town. 'What festival?' Rina asked as they weren't given a choice and forced to keep walking. Penny explained that everyone had spoken up about the festival, seeing as Robin, Demetrius, Sebastian and Rina were all out in the city; a major part of their community was missing. So, they had insisted to Mayor Lewis that the flower festival be delayed or cancelled. It was going to be a lot less extravagant than other years and held in the town square but at least it was going to on.
When they arrived, Sebastian put down their bags near a table that they claimed and he gently took Rina by the hand. Music was playing, people were chatting and eating food. Everyone greeted Rina happily, making her heart swell. He got her attention and smiled softly, 'I believe this year, I owe you a dance,' he said feeling a little nervous.
Rina smiled brightly at him and nodded, 'you remembered?'
'Of course,' he replied.
-x-
Rina exhaled as she looked in the mirror, 'stop it, stop it, stop it,' she whispered to herself as tears rose in her eyes. 'Stop it, stop thinking about it,' she scolded herself as she held onto the sides of her sink. She had done what she said she was going to do and had taken a bath, making sure that she was careful about some of the more severe wounds of her back. She was healing really well but she couldn't be stupid about pushing herself. Unfortunately, being on her own and in her own home had given her space to think and she had spiralled down the rabbit hole regarding the kiss with Sebastian. Now, that Sebastian was going to the city like he wanted, she felt that she was being selfish for being sad about it. 'Yoba, I'm such a fucking idiot,' she whispered to herself. Clearly the reason Sebastian hadn't mentioned the kiss was because it was all in her head. Drugged up and delirious with the panic and pain of everything that had happened so her mind had created some little fantasy, just like she had thought.
Some little fantasy about her best friend.
Her best friend, whom she was in love with.
'Fucks, sake,' she whispered and wiped her eyes. 'Rina, you are not going to fuck this up for him. He wants to get out and be in the city. You are going to suck it up like you know how and make sure that he damn well succeeds at what he wants to do,' she said, hyping herself up. 'Bastian wants to go to the city and you will support him in doing so, even… if it fucking sucks,' she said watching a tear drop onto her cheek. 'Yoba, damn it,' she whispered, as she wiped her eyes. With a deep inhale she looked at herself, trying to ignore her re rimmed eyes. 'At least my hair is clean now,' she said in attempt to make herself feel better.
'Pheeeeeebs? Mochi is hooome,' Sebastian called as he let himself in. 'He's been growling at me for the last half hour, I think he's hungry. I'm gonna feed him, okay?' He said conversationally.
'Shit, shit, shit, shit,' Rina whispered as she quickly brushed her teeth and washed her face again. She passed Sebastian on the way to her bedroom wrapped in a towel; she hadn't thought about taking any clothes into the bathroom. 'Sorry!' She said in a higher pitch than normal as she scurried through. 'Please, feed him,' she said even though Sebastian was looking in the cupboard for tins or kibble.
Sebastian turned to look at her, 'woah, hey,' he said as he caught sight of her eyes. 'Pheebs? Y'okay?' She nodded and disappeared before he could ask anything more and really set her off. He raised a brow and continued to feed the cat that was winding around his legs and miaowing at him
Rina leaned against her bedroom door as she shut it. 'Yoba, I'm so fucked,' she whispered to herself quietly.