Elizabeth felt like she was in a daze as Faith entered Rosemary's guest room. Her best friend was at her house with Jack. Nathan had walked Elizabeth to the Coulters' when she'd panicked at the thought of remaining in her home, a home she no longer felt safe in. Nathan stayed by her side until Faith came in. He lightly squeezed the hand he'd been holding, indicating that he was about to leave the room, but Elizabeth held his hand tighter, not wanting to let him go. His solid, steady presence had been an unexpected balm to her soul in an otherwise horrific night. She looked up at him, begging him without words to stay.
He seemed to understand. Placing his other hand on her shoulder, he looked directly into her eyes. "I'll be downstairs with Bill, Elizabeth. I'm not going anywhere. Faith needs to examine you privately."
His hushed words brought another torrent of tears from her. She buried her face in his chest, clinging to him. "Don't leave me," she whimpered. She needed his strength, his calm.
She needed him.
Nathan didn't respond; he just held her as she cried. Faith discreetly left the room for a few moments, giving them time. Nathan let Elizabeth cry, gently rubbing her back as if he was comforting a hurt child. Eventually Elizabeth's tears were spent. She slumped against Nathan, knowing that he was the only thing holding her up. Her legs certainly weren't strong enough to do so.
Faith came back into the room. Nathan pulled back, studying Elizabeth. "I have to go now," he said, tenderly wiping away her tears. Elizabeth closed her eyes, leaning into his touch. How was it that he could make her feel safe in the midst of the most horrifying night of her life? She didn't want him to leave, but she knew he couldn't stay while Faith did her examination. Nathan hesitated, pressing his lips together in a gesture Elizabeth recognized as uncertainty. He helped her sit on the bed, then took a deep breath. "Elizabeth, do you want me to get Lucas? He should know."
Elizabeth's eyes widened in horror, her reaction deep and visceral. "No!" she exclaimed, shaking her head quickly from side to side. "No. I don't want him to know. Not yet." She gripped Nathan's hand again, fear filling her. "Please, Nathan, promise me you won't say anything to him."
Nathan looked surprised at her reaction, but he quickly masked it. Patting her hand, he nodded. "Alright, I promise."
Relief flooded Elizabeth. She let go of his hand, a sudden weakness descending over her. "Thank you," she whispered.
Nathan nodded again. "I'll be back as soon as I can." He quietly slipped out of the room, closing the door behind him.
Elizabeth turned her attention to Faith. Her friend was watching her with compassionate eyes. "Do you want to tell me what happened?" she asked, sitting beside Elizabeth and wrapping an arm around her shoulders.
The tender gesture released tears once more, but Elizabeth found she could talk to Faith without fear of judgement. Her friend listened without interruption, allowing Elizabeth to tell her story. The words were halting and Elizabeth had to stop many times to fight through the memory, but Faith never rushed her. She just listened. When Elizabeth finished, Faith enveloped her in a hug. "Oh, my friend," she murmured. "I'm so sorry you had to go through that. No one should ever have to experience what you did tonight."
Elizabeth's only response was more tears. She wasn't sure which was worse: the physical pain or the emotional pain. She had never felt so scared or uncertain of the future. What would people think if they found out? Would it change the way they saw her?
Fear curled its powerful tentacles around her heart. She felt like a different person, scarred beyond recognition.
How would life ever be the same?
"I'm going to kill him."
Bill's growled threat echoed the feelings coursing through Nathan as the two men stood in the Coulters' living room. The town's judge was pacing back and forth, running his hands through his hair in helpless frustration. He glanced at Nathan. "You know I don't actually mean that, right?"
Nathan gave a mirthless laugh. "I'd gladly help you, Bill. Men like him are the scum of the earth." His hands clenched into fists. "We are going to arrest him first thing in the morning." His heart lurched in his chest as he realized what that would mean for Elizabeth. "You know she's going to have to identify him."
Bill nodded grimly. "I know. I wish that wasn't the case. She's been through enough already."
Nathan joined Bill in the pacing. "What if this goes to trial, Bill? The entire town will know something is going on. We wouldn't be able to hide it. Spurlock is smart enough to request a jury. All of Hope Valley would know what happened. I don't think that's what Elizabeth would want."
"She wouldn't," Bill confirmed. He sank onto the settee, a weary sigh leaving his lungs. "I don't know, Nathan. We're just going to have to take this one step at a time."
Nathan couldn't stop pacing. "Have the Mounties gotten back to you yet on Spurlock? Is there any information on him?"
Bill shook his head. "Not that we've found yet. I put in calls to all the major cities over the past week. If they've got anything on Spurlock or Walden, we'll know soon." Mouth forming into a straight line, Bill stood once more. "We've got Elizabeth's word already that Spurlock assaulted her," he said. "She is like a daughter to me, Nathan. Anyone who hurts her needs to be brought to justice. We're not waiting until morning to arrest him. We're going now."
Nathan wanted nothing more than to go with Bill, but he had promised Elizabeth he would be there when Faith finished her exam. "Let's wait until we can tell Elizabeth where we're going."
"Alright," Bill agreed. "But the moment she's settled, we leave."
Nathan nodded. Within ten minutes, Faith came down the stairs, leading Elizabeth. Nathan swore he saw tears in Bill's eyes as the older man embraced her, telling her that Spurlock wouldn't get away with his actions. Elizabeth nodded automatically, her eyes void of emotion. She looked numb. That pierced Nathan more than her sorrow had.
Faith drew Nathan aside as Bill tried to comfort Elizabeth. Her eyes were sparkling with anger. "Nathan, you need to arrest that man as soon as possible. He hurt Elizabeth deeply. She has wounds that are going to take time to heal, and she'll probably be in pain for several weeks. But her emotional state will take even longer to heal. This is a serious trauma that will be with her for the rest of her life. She said she doesn't want anyone else to know, which means her support will come from those of us who do know. She's going to need us all as friends more than ever."
Nathan closed his eyes, nodding in affirmation. "She'll have my friendship," he promised. The irony of his words hit him immediately. He'd been determined to stay away from Elizabeth after her declaration in the Mountie office and after seeing her at the bridge with Lucas. His broken heart couldn't handle being around her, couldn't handle being her friend.
Now he was determined to be there for her in whatever way she needed him to be. He would put aside his own pain and brokenness to support her in hers. Most importantly, he would see that justice was served.
At least in that, he could help her.
It was approaching the early morning hours by the time Elizabeth fell asleep in the Coulters' home. Rosemary was sitting with her, making sure she slept, while Lee kept an eye on little Jack, who had risen much earlier than normal. Bill and Nathan set out to the cabin where the Pinkertons had taken up residence.
It was a silent ride, each man absorbed in his own thoughts. Nathan's heart ached for the woman he loved. Though she was out of his reach, he knew he wouldn't be able to just stop loving her. Seeing her in pain only made his love stronger and deeper. He wished with all his heart that he could love her through this, but he knew it wasn't his place.
Lucas would be the one to carry her through.
A shot of pain pierced his heart, the force of it so strong he had to catch his breath. Closing his eyes, he reminded himself that he would be Elizabeth's friend. He would be there for her and he would support her as he could, but he would keep his feelings to himself. She had found happiness with Lucas, and he wasn't about to come between them.
Sometimes when you loved someone, you had to let them go. Elizabeth had made her choice, and it wasn't him. He needed to accept that while navigating the strange waters of being her friend in her time of need.
They reached the cabin. Both men drew their guns once they dismounted. Nathan cautiously went to the door. In the pre-dawn light, he knocked firmly. "Mounted Police! Open up!"
The sound of boots walking across the floor met his ears. The door opened. Nathan stood face to face with Julius Spurlock. He looked between Nathan and Bill with a delighted smile. "Well, well, well. To what do I owe this early morning visit, gentlemen?"
Nathan drew in a deep breath, trying to keep his anger in check. "Julius Spurlock, you're under arrest for the rape and assault of Elizabeth Thornton. You'll need to come with us."
Spurlock clicked his tongue in disapproval. "There's no need for that. I didn't assault anyone, Constable. You clearly have the wrong man."
"I think not," Nathan said through his teeth. "Turn around."
Spurlock obliged, a look of feigned innocence on his face. "You can arrest me on suspicion, but without evidence you'll have to let me go shortly. Isn't that right?" He gave Nathan a sneer. "And I'm guessing you have no evidence, Constable Grant."
Without thinking, Nathan gripped Spurlock's jacket and shoved him against the wall. Gritting his teeth, he leaned close. "I know it was you," he growled, his blood boiling at the man's cavalier attitude. "And you can bet we'll have you put away for a good, long time for what you did to Elizabeth."
Spurlock's brows raised and a small smile crossed his face. "Elizabeth, is it?" he taunted. "Do I detect something more than professional interest, Constable?"
Fighting the urge to punch the cocky man in front of him, Nathan slapped the handcuffs on him. "Bill, can you take it from here?" he asked through gritted teeth, pulling his prisoner toward the horse. He could feel himself losing control. Everything in him wanted to strike out at the Pinkerton for what he'd done.
"Gladly," Bill said. They loaded Spurlock onto Nathan's horse, and Bill started the trek back to town. Nathan watched them go. He had to take deep breaths to calm himself after that encounter. Walking back to town would give him the time he needed to clear his head.
He started walking at a brisk pace. It would be dawn soon. He knew they needed concrete evidence as quickly as possible. Faith's medical report of Elizabeth's assault and Elizabeth identifying Spurlock as the man who assaulted her would be enough to keep him behind bars until a trial. But they needed hard evidence for a judge. Right now the only evidence they had was circumstantial, nothing that would hold up in court.
His heart lurched as he realized the first course of action would be having Elizabeth identify her assailant. Closing his eyes, Nathan stopped walking briefly. He wished he could shield Elizabeth from the pain that seeing Spurlock would cause. She had still been in shock when he last saw her. What would seeing that man again do to her emotionally? Heart heavy, Nathan resumed his walk.
This was going to be a long day.
When Elizabeth woke, the sun was shining brightly. She blinked several times, feeling disoriented. This room wasn't hers. She frowned, trying to remember where she was.
In a rush, it all came back to her. Groaning, she wished for the oblivion of sleep once more.
"You're awake."
Elizabeth's head turned toward the voice. Rosemary was sitting in a rocking chair, Jack in her arms. The little boy was playing with his wooden Mountie quietly. When he caught sight of Elizabeth, he smiled and reached for her. "Hi, Mama."
Rosemary stood and placed Jack on the bed beside his mother. "He's been asking when you would get up," she said, putting a hand gently on Elizabeth's shoulder. "It's almost noon. Can I get you something to eat? I have some grilled cheese and tomato soup."
"That's fine," Elizabeth said automatically. The last thing she wanted to do was eat, but she knew Rosemary would never let her be unless she took care of herself. Holding Jack tightly, Elizabeth closed her eyes, drawing comfort from her little boy. She focused all her senses on him - his sweet scent, his soft hair, his contented sighs. For a moment she was able to forget the horror of the night before. Jack seemed to sense that she needed him. His little arms wrapped around her neck and he laid his head on her shoulder. "I love you, Mama," he said, his words a balm to Elizabeth's soul.
"I love you too, sweet boy," Elizabeth whispered, pulling him a little closer. They stayed like that until Rosemary came back into the room. She wore an apologetic look.
"Nathan is here," she said. "He said he needs to talk to you."
Stomach dropping, Elizabeth nodded slowly. Rosemary took Jack once more, settling him on her hip. "I brought over some of your clothes last night. They're in the closet. Take your time getting ready; Nathan said there's no hurry."
Elizabeth nodded again, wrapping her arms around herself. Rosemary gave her a sympathetic look, then quietly left the room.
Going to the closet, Elizabeth pulled out a black skirt and a long-sleeved navy blouse. The outfit was much darker than what she would normally wear, but it fit her mood. She pulled her hair into a simple braid, then glanced in the mirror. The woman staring back at her looked solemn and haggard. There were ugly bruises on her face. Elizabeth felt as if she had aged ten years overnight. She sighed. Maybe she had. She knew she would never be the same, not after last night.
After applying some powder to her face to cover the bruises as best she could, Elizabeth made her way down the stairs. She was surprised to feel her stomach rumble at the smell of food. Nathan was near the table, holding Jack and chatting with Rosemary. Elizabeth paused, taking in the sight of Nathan with her son. He was holding the toddler easily, including him in the conversation.
Lucas never does that. The thought floated through Elizabeth's mind without warning. She let out a breath, pushing the thought away. Lucas just needed more time to adjust to the idea of having a child in his life.
Nathan's voice broke into her musings. "What's that, Jack?" he asked, pointing to the wooden toy in his hands.
Jack lifted it high in the air, waving it around. "Mountie!" he proclaimed. "Mountie like Na'tan and Papa!"
Nathan and Rosemary chuckled. "That's right," Nathan said. "Where's the Mountie's horse?"
"At home," Jack said, lowering the toy. "I call horsie Neigh-Neigh."
Elizabeth couldn't help smiling at her son's announcement. She'd tried to get him to give his toy horse a proper name, but he'd insisted on Neigh-Neigh. Nathan laughed, giving a nod of approval. "That's a good name for a horse," he said, his blue eyes twinkling.
Despite her emotional upheaval, Elizabeth caught her breath. Nathan was so at ease with Jack. The laughter in his eyes and the way he was holding her son made her heart skip a beat. The feeling surprised her. Shaking it off, she told herself it was only because she was seeing what should have been with Jack Sr. She had made her choice. Lucas was her future. She had no business thinking of Nathan as anything other than a friend.
She stepped forward deliberately, making her presence known. Nathan looked her way, his eyes immediately reflecting compassion and care. "Elizabeth. How are you?"
Tears welled in her eyes without warning. Rosemary placed a tender hand on her shoulder. "I'll take Jack out for a walk while you two talk," she said softly. "Eat, Elizabeth. Your food is on the table."
Elizabeth nodded, wiping her eyes. Rosemary took Jack from Nathan and headed out, leaving the two of them alone. Nathan regarded Elizabeth with an unmistakable tenderness. He held out his arms in an invitation, offering her comfort if she wanted it.
She did. Elizabeth moved into Nathan's arms as if it was the most natural thing in the world. His strength emanated from him like a physical force, enveloping her and lifting her from her darkness. She rested her head against his chest. No tears fell from her eyes. They had dried, leaving a numbness and coldness in their place. Nathan's warmth thawed a bit of the chill. He was acting as her protector, and Elizabeth knew deep down it was not just because he'd come to Hope Valley to look after Jack's widow.
He cared. He even lov…
Elizabeth slammed the door shut on that thought, squeezing her eyes shut. She couldn't think about that. Not here. Not now. Instead she focused on Nathan's heartbeat, pulsing rhythmically and steadily against her cheek. The sound and the feel were comforting.
Nathan slowly pulled back. He placed a hand on Elizabeth's cheek, carefully avoiding her bruises. "Elizabeth, we arrested Spurlock."
Elizabeth's jaw clenched at the name, but relief filled her at the same time. "He's in jail?" she breathed.
Nathan nodded. "For now. We will need concrete evidence to keep him there, and that will start with identification." His throat worked. "I hate to ask this of you, but I'll need you to come to the jail with me to identify him as your assailant."
A whimper escaped her lips before she could stop it. "Do I have to?" she asked, her voice small.
Pain filled Nathan's face, but he nodded. His hand tightened unconsciously on her cheek. "I promise I will be by your side the entire time," he vowed. "We won't be in there any longer than necessary."
Various emotions warred inside of Elizabeth. The last thing she wanted was to see Spurlock again. "What happens if I don't identify him?"
Understanding lit Nathan's eyes. He led her to the table, helping her to sit. Elizabeth winced in pain as she sat, another reminder of the trauma she had suffered. Raw emotion shone from Nathan's face as he observed her, and she somehow knew that he felt her pain as his own. The thought brought her a measure of comfort. It proved beyond a doubt that Nathan was a man of deep feeling and deep emotion. When he loved, he loved with all his heart…
Again, Elizabeth forcibly turned her thoughts to something else. She began eating the food Rosemary had left for her, not because she was hungry, but to escape the turbulent emotions raging inside.
Nathan sat next to her, finally answering her question. "If you don't identify him, he will walk," he said softly. "But if you positively identify him, that along with Faith's medical report will be enough to keep him in jail until a judge can hear the case."
Elizabeth chewed her sandwich slowly. "I don't know if I can handle that, Nathan."
He covered her free hand with his. "I know," he said, his thumb rubbing over the back of her hand. "This will be hard, Elizabeth. Very hard. But you won't be alone. I promise." He sat back, letting her think it over. Finally she gave a slow nod.
"Alright."
The one word was all that was needed. They sat in silence as Elizabeth finished her food. Nathan held her hand the entire time, neither of them thinking twice about the comforting gesture. It felt natural and right.
Taking a deep breath, Elizabeth stood. "I'm ready." Nathan offered her his arm, once more giving her a gift of support. Elizabeth took it gratefully, and together they walked into town. Not stopping to think of how it might look, Elizabeth walked close by Nathan's side, feeling protected. They were almost at the jail when Lucas's voice broke the silence.
"What's going on?"
He stood a few feet in front of them, arms crossed and feet apart, looking between Nathan and Elizabeth with a near accusatory expression. Nathan looked back calmly, but Elizabeth felt a sudden sense of turmoil and fear. How could she explain this without telling him what had happened? She knew he would have to know eventually, but right now she couldn't force any words past her tight throat.
Nathan's arm unconsciously tightened, pulling Elizabeth closer to him as if to protect her once more. From what, Elizabeth wasn't sure. Lucas wasn't a threat. He was simply upset, understandably misreading the situation. Elizabeth felt a sense of relief when Nathan spoke.
"Elizabeth was the victim of an assault last night," he said, his words quiet so only Lucas could hear as people milled around town. "I'm taking her to the jail to identify the man."
Lucas looked at Elizabeth in shock, seeing for the first time the bruises on her face and neck, not fully covered by the makeup. "Assault? What kind of assault?"
Elizabeth let go of Nathan's arm, stepping toward Lucas, finally finding her words. "I'm not ready to talk about that yet, Lucas," she said, her voice pleading with him. "Please understand that. I promise I'll tell you soon." She paused, wrestling with herself. "I just can't talk about it right now."
Lucas nodded, understanding in his eyes. "Of course, Elizabeth," he said. "I hope everything will be alright."
Nothing will be alright. Tears stung her eyes again, but she kept herself from crying. "Thank you."
Lucas reached for her, intending to draw her into an embrace, but Elizabeth shrank back. The thought of being touched by him made her recoil. Without thinking, she huddled against Nathan. "No!"
Lucas froze, hurt in his eyes. Nathan's arms encircled her, perhaps unintentionally, but once again he shielded her. Lucas frowned, watching them. "You won't let me hold you, but you let him do so?" he asked, jerking his head at Nathan.
Elizabeth felt Nathan's arms tense, but she made no move to escape from his embrace. She couldn't explain why she had run from Lucas while she felt at ease with Nathan. Nothing made sense right now.
"I'm sorry," she choked. "Nathan makes me feel safe…"
Lucas's brow shot up. "And I don't?" Disbelief darkened his features. "Fine." He pivoted on his heel and stalked toward the saloon. Elizabeth watched helplessly, part of her wanting to run to him and the other part wanting to stay away.
Nathan's gentle voice broke into her thoughts. "Are you alright?"
"No," she replied, looking back at him. "I'm confused, I'm hurt, and I have no idea where my life is headed. Everything is a mess, Nathan. I might have just ruined things with Lucas, just when we found each other."
Nathan's eyes closed momentarily, and Elizabeth felt a pang of regret at her final words. Of course they would hurt Nathan. "I'm sorry…" she whispered.
Nathan shook his head, opening his eyes. "Don't apologize," he said. "I'll get used to the idea eventually." He gave her a little smile. "I doubt you ruined anything. I'm sure Lucas will understand when you explain what happened."
"I don't think I can," Elizabeth said, her voice raspy. She bit her lip as a thought crossed her mind. Maybe it was the easy way out, but she wasn't sure she could talk to Lucas herself. "Would you tell him what happened?" she asked timidly.
"Of course," Nathan said, no hesitation in his tone. "I will help you through this in any way I can, Elizabeth. Know that I will always watch out for you." He paused, his Adam's apple visibly bobbing. "As your friend."
Friend. For some reason, the word made Elizabeth want to sob. Something felt so final about it. She wasn't sure why, but she didn't like it.
Before she could analyze the feeling, Nathan reached down to take her hand. They were standing in front of the Mountie office. "Are you ready?" he asked. "This won't be easy, but it's the first step towards justice."
Elizabeth let out a heavy breath. "As ready as I can be," she said, her voice shaking slightly.
Nathan smiled at her, encouragement written on his face. "You're a brave woman, Elizabeth," he said, looking directly into her eyes. "I want you to know that."
She laughed without humor. "I don't feel brave, Nathan. I feel like darkness has enveloped me and will never let me go."
He gently squeezed her hand as they climbed the steps to his office. "'Every sunset brings the promise of a new dawn,'" he said.
Elizabeth looked at him in surprise. "Did you just quote Emerson?"
He nodded. "I did." He turned to face her fully. "I know everything looks dark right now, Elizabeth. But your dawn will come again. Hold onto that."
For the first time, Elizabeth felt a faint glimmer of hope. She held tight to Nathan's hand, holding onto the lifeline he gave her both physically and mentally. With a nod, she looked at the door, steeling herself for the task ahead.
"I'm ready."