AN: So following reviews and a few PMs, I think I actually am going to write just a few more short one shot updates to add to this, since I've always been infatuated by pre-pilot Chair and their magnetism and kinship. There's just so much chemistry between them, even in episode one. I simply don't choose to believe that things didn't happen between them before the limo ride that changed all of our lives. These are just going to be missing moments as and when I feel inspired to write them.
'Come on Blair, won't you at least try it?' Nate proffered the half-smoked joint to her lazily from his seat across the coffee table. The glass surface was strewn with tattered rolling papers.
Blair's nose was pinched in disgust as she battled to inhale as little as possible of the pungent second-hand smoke slipping from the mouths and noses of Nate and Chuck.
'Absolutely not.' She cried at her mumbling boyfriend, her arms folding across her chest.
'It's not going to kill you.' He chuckled, waggling the very reason that she'd have to abandon her favourite coat before stepping back into her mother and father's home later that night.
'You can never be too careful.' She pronounced through tightly-gritted teeth.
'Serena always used to smoke with us.' Chuck jibed from beside her, smirking.
'Yeah, she did.' Like a poisoned dagger to Blair's heart, Nate's eyes seemed to find their sparkle again; for the first time since the aforementioned good-time girl had left them all behind without a single word of reason or goodbye.
Chuck noticed it too, and he watched her with the same sad, sympathetic look he'd been wearing whenever he thought she couldn't see his face. He'd been wearing it for weeks.
'You never know, it might loosen you up a little, make you less bitchy.' Chuck poked her with his elbow while taking a long drag from the joint and puffing the haze in her direction.
'Hey, man.' Nate protested half-heartedly, after a pointed look from his girlfriend indicated that he ought to have stood up for her. It was little use though, his reddened eyes had already begun to narrow, and he fell further and further away from her, towards the sleepy daze threatening to capture him.
Blair groaned and wafted away the billowing cloud of smoke. Since Serena's abrupt departure the month before, nothing had been quite right. She still hadn't heard from her best friend, despite her many attempts to contact her, and Lily was being tighter-lipped than usual in her explanations.
She watched her boyfriend on the opposite couch as he drifted away into cannabis-fuelled slumber. If Serena hadn't gone, she wouldn't have to be here now; if Serena hadn't gone, things might still be normal.
'What are you thinking?' Chuck drawled from her side, focussed on Blair like she were at once a puzzle both easy and difficult to decipher.
'Why do you always have that look in your eye?' She questioned, turning her body to assess him properly.
'What are you talking about?' He answered, looking away. His manner was as relaxed as always, but she'd seen the uncertainty flash over his eyes when he averted them so abruptly.
Blair looked over at Nate, whose sleeping face looked like that of a tormented angel. 'Like you know something I don't.'
Chuck sighed heavily, following her sorrowful gaze towards Nate. He fumbled on the couch for her hand and laced his fingers through hers.
'What are you doing?' Blair hissed, lurching away from her seat and moving to hastily wrench her hand free from his.
Her struggles only made him hold onto her tighter though, and he pulled her back down. 'Calm down would you? I'm just trying to be a friend.' Chuck murmured.
Blair's brows furrowed as she searched his expression for sincerity. Finding it, they furrowed even further, but she settled hesitantly back beside him. He stroked the soft skin that tied her thumb to her index finger
'Don't worry, I'm not going to try and have my way with you again, unless you ask me very nicely.' He leered, grinning. 'Again.' He repeated the word obnoxiously.
'Give it up, Chuck.' Blair tutted, but she allowed him to carry on holding her hand nonetheless. 'And since when did you grow such a big heart?'
'Don't insult me.' He jested. 'I care about very few people in this world, you just happen to be one of them.'
The smile that tugged at the corner of her lips was involuntary.
'You're wondering what you could have possibly done to deserve winding up here, aren't you?' He laughed, but the sound was dark.
'No.' She insisted quickly.
'Yes you are, I know you. You're wishing Serena was here so she could be the one grabbing your hand, pulling you away and denouncing our smoking as you hastened over to Fifth in fits of giggles about your stupid boyfriend's stoner tendencies.'
'No.' She lied again, though it was more of a whisper this time. 'And Nate isn't stupid.' Blair protested weakly.
'He's the most stupid man I know.' Chuck affirmed, looking over at his best friend with a degree of malice in his gaze that didn't seem to befit a mere criticism of his lacking intellect.
They were quiet for a time after that, both silently watching Nate sleep. Chuck's fingers carried on stroking against hers. She knew she ought to have pulled her hand out of his, but nothing had felt so comforting as his fingertips circling her skin since Serena's disappearance.
Finally, Blair could hold back her questions no longer. 'God, why did she go Chuck? I know you know. You keep looking at me with those weird, compassionate eyes that I can't stand.'
He chuckled humourlessly, then squeezed her hand. 'She's gone, Blair, and trust me when I say it's for the best. Just let sleeping dogs lie.'
'I can't.' Blair ground the words out. 'She's my sister, and she just left without saying a word. What do you know? You know something that I don't- all of you do. I'm stumbling around in the dark while everyone else knows where the light switch is. Please, tell me.' She begged. 'Why won't you tell me why she left? Was it something I did?'
Chuck eyed her again, the sympathetic look was now so strong, and mingled with regret, that it bored into her very soul.
'Stop looking at me like that!' She ordered, her voice emerging louder and more stricken than she'd anticipated.
They both looked immediately over at Nate, who had stirred slightly, but was not disturbed by her outburst. Blair released a shaky breath and sank further against the couch.
'Just forget about her, Blair.' He implored.
'How can you say that?' She demanded quizzically, searching his eyes again for some sign or key to the secrets he was so patently keeping for someone else.
His shoulders rose and fell. 'Because if you knew what she'd done, you wouldn't want her to step one foot back in this city.'
'Just tell me. Whatever it is, I know I'd forgive her if it meant having her back.' She hated admitting her weakness, but the hole Serena had left behind meant Blair was sure she would have forgiven her best friend just about anything.
'I can't, it's not for me to tell.' He returned, looking genuinely remorseful for the first time she could remember.
'Why are you protecting her?' Blair demanded. 'Am I not your friend too? She's not even here and she still gets everything from everyone, while I get nothing.'
Her words might have seemed petty and jealous to someone else, but Chuck had understood her. He'd understood her from the very first day they both watched Nate's pupils dilate for Serena.
'I'm not protecting her.' He denied. She couldn't help but hear the truly terrifying fact that remained unspoken in his promise- it was louder than the clap of thunder.
With fear licking up in her belly like hot flames, Blair looked over at Nate again, at the only other person Chuck would deem worthy of protecting. She shook her head, casting aside the doubts about her boyfriend that had been creeping over her for years. He wouldn't, she wouldn't, they wouldn't.
'Ignorance is sometimes bliss, Blair.' Chuck mused, still holding onto her hand tight.
She nodded, her pretty features worried by a doubtful grimace.
'I have to go.' She announced sadly, standing up with an abruptness that shocked them both. He let go of her hand, but kept his eyes fixed on her while she searched for her bag. 'We have that literature paper due on Monday.' It was a weak excuse, he knew her well enough to know she'd had the assignment completed since the day it had been set.
'I would not wish any companion in the world but you.' Chuck spoke as she got to her feet and headed towards the door.
'What?' Blair spun on her heel to regard him, her breath catching short in her throat.
'The Tempest?' He raised an eyebrow. 'For the paper.'
'Oh, right. Yes.' She bleated. 'Good night, Chuck.'
'Good night, Blair.'