-XXX-

SASUKE

There was much to celebrate on Friday. I finally made it. I was officially employed by the Namikaze Group. I met with Minato Namikaze, signed a contract with him, and to his delight, I told him I wanted to stay to start working right away.

The office was already prepared for me, I had now officially met my new secretary, Hinata Hyuga, and Minato had already placed some documents on my desk by the end. I energetically got into it, making preliminary notes and writing down all my notes and thoughts that came to me during the process.

Minato told me that there was going to be a little get-together after work hours, so I texted Sakura that I'd be home later today. That's why I was really surprised when I saw Sakura coming from the elevator to the floor. She was carrying a tray of muffins and cookies.

When I looked over to the corner of the conference room where the buffet was set up with all the fancy food, I wanted to roll my eyes. Bringing homemade muffins and cookies to such a fancy occasion was a little odd. And why did she come anyway? I didn't invite her.

I got an answer sooner than I expected. Kushina clapped her hands together and hurried over to Sakura. "So you came, dattebane!" She said cheerfully. "And you even baked the cookies and muffins like I asked you to. You're simply the best, you know!" Kushina then started hugging her and suddenly there was a huge commotion around my fiancée.

I put on the right face and crossed the room, knowing that all eyes were on me.

I took Sakura from behind around her waist, pulling her close to my chest, and as I leaned down, I buried my face in her hair by her ear. Then I softly muttered, "You didn't tell me anything... If I had known you were coming, I would have waited for you below at the entrance."

I squeezed her tighter. "And you didn't even answer my text." Startled, she turned her head over her shoulder to look at me. "Kushina convinced me it would be a surprise." Suddenly the main contributor joined our little conversation. "I was worried that if you found out Sakura was coming with goodies, you might steal her us and her tray too." She made a joke at the lovestruck fiancés.

I gave a small smile at her teasing tone. "One treat is enough for me, you can keep the tray."

Kushina giggled, so I knew I'd said it right. She grabbed Sakura's hand at once. "But stop it already, you two! The guests want to see her and I need to get the details of your planned wedding out of her, you know!" Kushina took Sakura away and I then headed off for a glass of scotch. And I had a few cookies, too. Sakura didn't make them too sweet, so they were edible.

So that's how the evening started. I felt like I wasn't even there. I went from group to group, trying to talk to Minato, Shino Aburame, Kiba Inuzuka, Choji Akimichi and even a guy named Lee, who had been running around Sakura way too much all evening, constantly needing to help her with something. I also tried to talk to many others I had just met.

But everyone laughed at me for wanting to talk about work when there's a party like this. Minato tapped me on the shoulder and laughed that he was happy that I was trying so hard, but that we had plenty of time until Monday.

I listened to everyone's plans for the weekend, how they talked about female colleagues or wives and their lives. I wondered how anyone could be so attached to another person. It seemed to me that all the married people were in the same boat, and the ones who weren't married just talked about how they wanted to find their soulmate.

All the engaged men gazed adoringly at their halves. It made me a little sick, but I followed their example and watched Sakura walk around the room and talk to people. Most often she was with Hinata, Kushina, a girl named Tenten, and Ino Yamanaka, whose father also worked for the Namikaze Group.

Sakura seemed to be the star of the night. Everyone wanted to talk to my fiancée. Everyone wanted to taste her baked goodies, and they disappeared before all the fancy dishes. When did Sakura become more important than me? She was just supposed to be my sidekick to get to the top. I was always the one with all eyes in the room. How could it have changed so much? I thought about it and frowned.

Last week at the backyard barbecue, it was also like this. When Sakura was with me, people were talking to me, drawing me into their conversations. But when we got separated and Minato wasn't with me either, they were polite but distant. They didn't talk to me personally. Not that I mind, it's just my observation.

It was all about business. That's what I was best at. But Sakura brought a warmth and lightness to the conversation. She made me more approachable, less distant, and more likable to people. Her friendliness did exactly what I wanted. It pissed me off. I felt like I really needed her. And I don't need anyone, I've always made everything on my own. Relying on myself only.

Minato laughed loudly. "Okay, Sasuke. Quit scowling at the accounting people. They just want to make friends with Sakura. You don't need to throw murderous looks at them." I lowered my eyes and sighed. I didn't throw murderous looks at them. I realized that Sakura had irritated me, even though she was doing exactly what I wanted her to do.

But in doing so, she was also distracting from my person, and my ego didn't like that at all. I forced a forced smile. "She attracts them like a fire attracts a moths." Minato took my comment as an attempt at a joke and chuckled. "Yes, she's a wonderful young lady. You're a lucky man, Sasuke. But we've kept you apart long enough." He patted my back and nodded his head towards Sakura. "Go to your fiancée and get something to eat."

I nodded and smiled, hopefully convincingly, and parted to follow Sakura. She saw me approaching and made a happy face at seeing me. When I held out my hand to her, she grabbed it and allowed herself to be pulled closer. Honestly, I was already pretty drunk.

I leaned in and pressed my lips to her ear. As I inhaled the scent of her shampoo, I said. "We've been separated for too damn long I guess..." She giggled and took my face in her hands. Judging by the flush of her cheeks and just a little shyness, the glasses of red wine she'd had were starting to show on her too. "I was wondering when you were coming to see me, Sasuke-kun."

"Don't worry, Sakura. I haven't taken my eyes off you all night." I bent even lower, burying my face in the space between her neck and the exposed shoulder of her pretty summer dress. I had to think about how she smelled so nice and tempting every time. It was a light feminine scent, nothing too strong.

What I told her was true. For some reason I kept following her gaze wherever she moved in the room, even though I didn't really want to. Ino next to us burst out laughing. "You two really can't stay away from each other!" Even though Yamanaka had been helping with various preparations over the past few days to Sakura, she didn't know how things really were between us. Ino was married to Sai Yamanaka, who had worked faithfully for Danzo for years, so she understood why Sakura was upset about the whole work situation, so Ino didn't question anything. At least I hoped so.

I raised my head and looked at Yamanaka. "And who could blame me? I've had enough of hiding." Yamanaka had a sad look on her face. "I can't imagine how hard it was... Sai told me he'd never seen Danzo this upset. But he deserved it!" I nodded in agreement and squeezed Sakura tighter around the waist. "No one can imagine."

"Well, I hate to do this, but Sakura and I have others to talk to and a lot of people to talk about." She made a sly face and grabbed Sakura's wrist. I couldn't resist and the snide remark just fell out of me. "Do they not want to talk to me?"

Yamanaka shook her head. "They already know you, Sasuke-kun! Of course you're welcome too, but the star of the evening tonight is Sakura." She took her hand and led her away. I dutifully but silently followed behind them. My slightly drunken mood changed from irritation to sheer fury.

Yamanaka said it right. I signaled to the bartender that I wanted another scotch and ignored Sakura's warning look. If she's going to be a star, I'm not leaving her alone. Like an adoring fiancé who can't keep his hands off her. I'm not gonna let this slide like it's nothing.

...

"Sasuke-kun, haven't you had enough of these?" Sakura said warningly, trying to snatch the glass of scotch from my hand again. But like for the fifth time, unsuccessfully. And that's only because she was a bit tied up. I held her by her waist so close to me that she barely made any movements.

"Sasuke-kun!" She cried out muffledly, all red as my hand from her waist began to slowly slide down to her hips and further to her thight. "People are watching, Sasuke-kun!" I buried my face with a smirk in the soft skin of her neck. "Hn... Whatever..."

As my body weakened under the influence of alcohol, so apparently did my grip, because she turned around and looked into my eyes. She stood on tiptoe, and I ducked my head to hear what she had to say. To anyone who saw us, it looked like we were exchanging secrets. We looked like lovers whispering spicy things to each other. But the truth was very different.

"Sasuke-kun, there was nothing in our contract about me getting groped by you in public all evening..." She said softly so no one around us could hear her. Still, her eyes darted from side to side uncertainly. She felt uncomfortable, I could tell that immediately from her stitching and her expressions.

I frowned and pulled her by the waist again. This time so close that I could feel her irregularly heaving chest against my chest. My arm around her was like an iron weight. "No, but I'm paying you to be a loving fiancée, so play your part." I said strongly and kicked the rest of the contents of my glass to my mouth. "If I want to touch you, I'll do it, dammit."

Half angry and half resentful, she asked me. "You already have the job, so why are you acting like this?" I looked sternly into her eyes. "And I want to keep it, so act like you can't wait to get home and celebrate with me in private."

At that moment Sakura froze, her eyes terrified and horrified. It was amazing to see the dark green rim around her irises up close like that. Her short hair was a little wavy at the end and I remembered what she looked like with her long hair still worn pinned up. "I really like your new hairstyle..." I mumbled as my head fell into her curls. "Wh... What?" She said so weakly I almost didn't hear her.

I leaned my face even closer and my lips brushed against her full and beautifully soft cheek. "Sakura... I'm gonna kiss you now."

I didn't give her a chance to say anything and pressed my lips to hers, already slightly open in shock. I held the back of her head and intertwined my fingers in her smooth hair. I was angry, and because she was the cause of it, I turned an innocent kiss on the lips into something more. Despite Sakura's disapproving purr, I deepened our kiss and my tongue met hers for the first time. Like my mood, my tongue fought too to show who had the upper hand here.

I hadn't in the least expected her to arch her back to be closer to me and a wave of heat to run through my entire body. And I didn't expect Sakura to run her hands seductively up my arms and then wrap her arms around my neck as tightly as I hugged her. By the way she arched her back and gave in like melted butter, I figured she felt the searing heat inside her too, it wasn't one-sided. It couldn't.

A blissful sigh escaped her lips from our kisses and I've been busy enough to keep myself in control. She could have been the best actress, but this was different. Nothing prepared me for this rush of desire. And certainly nothing had prepared me for my wishful thinking that we were alone together and not surrounded by a crowd of people watching me kiss my fiancée.

After a brief but passionate kiss, I pulled away from her and caught Yamanaka and Kushina's amused expressions, to which I didn't respond. I kissed Sakura on the tip of her nose, took a step back and released her from my iron grip.

Sakura gasped and staggered a little, so I quickly reached out my hand and caught her. I supported her and gave her a concerned look. "Everything okay?" She looked up at me, her lips red and wet, her cheeks flushed pink and her gaze bewildered. As she noticed my smirk at the corner of my lips, she shook off my hand roughly and began to fix her hair. "Maybe we should head home, Sasuke-kun..."

"I was hoping you'd say that."

She looked at me angrily with puffy cheeks and I wanted to laugh. Whether she knew it or not, she had just made everyone think we were crazy about each other. My plan was working.

"Don't leave yet!" Kushina exclaimed. "Stay at least another hour, dattebane!" She begged us not to leave just yet. "It's not even nine yet. Ino-chan and I haven't properly iinterrogated her about the wedding yet. She hasn't told us anything, and we suspect she's keeping something from us!" My new boss's wife laughed loudly, and Sakura looked like she wanted to be out of here as soon as possible.

"All right..." I agreed. "But then she's all mine."

Kushina mumbled something about how men were sometimes impatient twits and pulled Sakura away. I looked after them, feeling rather unsettled myself. I hope I didn't overdo it...

From a distance, Kiba Inuzuka caught my stare. The guy had been getting on my nerves all night, so when he gave me an amused wink, I picked myself up and headed for the bar without giving him a second glance.

Scotch had the answer to everything tonight.

...

I couldn't drive, but I had enough sense to know that. Kushina offered to let us take her car and driver, but Sakura insisted on driving back home herself and I didn't object. I wasn't completely drunk, but I was close to that.

I just had too much scotch in me. It helped to dull the burning feeling that came over me every time I heard Sakura laugh or saw her sweet smile. Or when I saw that she'd made a new friendship again.

I didn't understand why I cared or why it bothered me so much. She could charm people with her warmth, I knew that from the start. I went with the plan that if Minato's family and friends liked her, I'd get my chance. Because no one would believe that someone as nice and pleasant as Sakura could fall for a jerk with my reputation.

But it just pissed me off.

All the way home in the car Sakura was silent, looking at the road. But I could feel her eyes on me now and then, checking me out cautiously. Before in front of Minato's house, she had to hold me around the middle to get me into the car without any problems. For a woman so small and slender, she was actually surprisingly strong.

When we arrived home after a long journey of ugly atmosphere, my head wasn't so dizzy, so I got inside relatively alone, Sakura just supported me. As we stood in the living room, she helped me take off my jacket and looked concerned. "You didn't eat anything at the party, Sasuke-kun... I could make you a little something to eat." I didn't understand where she was getting the energy to take care of me despite her own tiredness.

"No, I'm fine." I shook my head. "I ate some of your cookies." She gave me a surprised look. I guess she didn't expect me to even taste them, let alone eat a few. "It's not a meal, it's a snack." She looked disappointed and sighed. "I'll make you a quick sandwich and some coffee. Then you'll feel better..." With that, she turned and walked away to the fridge.

"Stop pretending you care about me or what I need." I said the moment she grabbed the handle of the fridge. I turned to face the living room and walked to the bar, where I reached for a bottle of scotch. "I said I'm fine, I'll just have another drink."

"That's not a good idea." Her annoyingly worried voice echoed behind my back.

"Why?"

"Because you've had more than enough of them today... You need to eat something." I didn't even notice when she came to me so quickly. I only noticed her when she snatched the bottle out of my hand. Without thinking, I grabbed her arm so violently that she turned around and frantically waited for me to do or say something.

"You're not going to decide for me. If I want a drink, I'll drink."

Sakura opened her mouth with a gasp as if to say something, but in the end she just let go of the bottle I reached for and shook her head with a frown on her face. "Why do you drink so much, Sasuke? You should be happy! You fooled everyone in the Namikaze Group, got your dream job, and you took revenge on Danzo! So why are you acting like a little kid who's favorite dinosaur toy was taken away?" Sakura blurted out exactly what she meant without holding back or restraint.

And at that moment, something exploded inside me. All those feelings I've been suppressing all night. Anger at how easily Sakura was accepted into their family and into their lives. Frustration that I'm the one standing aside. Anger at the damn weird feelings that came when Sakura was around and anger at how I reacted to her closeness, like I actually liked it.

I shouldn't have liked it. I didn't like it and I didn't like her either.

"Tell me, Sakura... What do you get out of all this? Do you have some twisted sense of being martyred?" She stared at me in horror with her deep green eyes, and her pupils glistened in the dimness of the room.

"Do you have some sick feeling that you're better than me?" I snorted. "You put up with my whims as my secretary for a year and then you agreed to this charade almost without blinking an eye." At this point my anger clouded my common sense and I completely put out of my mind the way I'd persuaded and cajoled her into agreeing in the beginning.

"Do you feel like your sacrifice will make me a better person or something equally stupid?" I snapped at her spitefully. "You think I'm going to fall in love with you, we're going to have a little romance, and you're going to be secure for the rest of your life?!" I don't know what got into me. All the repressed emotions were coming out one after another thanks to the alcohol. I couldn't suppress or stop it. "That's what you think?"

Sakura didn't hesitate and shook her head furiously in disapproval. "That's not it at all..."

"Then why did you agree? Why are you doing all this?" Now she remained silent. She was just biting her lip so hard I thought she was going to start bleeding. With a curse, I reached in front of her with my hand and pushed her away slightly. "Get out of my sight."

I bent down to the bar and took out an empty glass. I poured myself a big drink and downed it. The burning alcohol warmed my throat and chest, so I topped off another glass, put the bottle down, and walked over to the window with glass in my hand.

I looked out into the darkness of the street. At the lights coming out of the night in the form of street lamps. Sakura remained standing behind my back, not moving. I was about to tell her to leave again, but then she started talking.

"Tsunade Senju is not my real aunt." She began in a muffled voice. "I just call her that so I don't have to explain our relationship over and over again." Although I couldn't see her face, I could tell from her weak and pained voice that she was talking about something that was weighing on her mind and probably hurting her.

"When I was twelve, my parents died in a car accident. I had no one else, so I ended up in foster care." This news surprised me, but I remained silent. I knew her parents had died, but she never mentioned being in foster care.

"Twelve-year-olds aren't exactly the most desirable on the list for adoption or at least foster care, so I went through a few places." She took a deep breath and continued on. "The last place I was... well... it wasn't very nice." Something in her voice made me turn around. She was standing where I'd left her, head down, hair covering her face so I couldn't see her eyes.

"I ran away from there. I was on the streets for a while until one day I met Tsunade Senju. She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen." The corners of her lips lifted into a slight smile as she began to speak of her 'aunt'. "She was extremely kind. She took me into her home, washed me and fed me, and then I decided to stay with her. Tsunade is a very determined woman, so there was no problem with the authorities in the end."

"She was everything to me. Mom, dad, aunt, friend and teacher. She wasn't very rich herself and had a bit of a gambling problem, but she made great use of what she had and always knew how to manage. I had a couple of part-time jobs to raise a little more money. But she knew how to celebrate like no one else and made even the hardest work into a fun game." I was at a loss for words and just listened.

"She used to be a great doctor and had a lot of books at home that I lay in daily. After a while she decided to teach me and I wanted to follow in her footsteps one day. It was a peaceful life, and for the first time since my parents died, I felt safe and loved." Sakura ran her fingers along the edge of the sofa she was standing next to. Up and down in irregular movements that suddenly stopped. "I even went to college. I got straight A's in high school, so I got a scholarship."

I remember that fact from her notes.

"You never finished school..." Was the first thing I said. I didn't mean it mockingly. I was more curious about what happened that she never made it through. When she answered me, her voice sounded low and sad. "Tsunade has become ill. I lived with her for a while after I started college too, and I noticed she was acting strange."

"She was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease. Then she started having liver problems and it started to go downhill. At that time she needed constant care, despite scolding me and telling me she could take care of herself on her own. The facility they put her in at the time was horrible. She was neglected and unhappy. I had to fight to get her transferred, but the next place was just as bad."

"That doesn't explain anything."

She lifted her head towards me that I could finally see her face properly and pinned me with her pissed off look. "Stop being so mean, Sasuke-kun... I'm trying to explain myself to you." I raised my hands. "I'm just trying to make sure this is coming to a point." I started to feel my knees buckling thanks to the alcohol.

"The point is that I understand that aunt Tsunade needs better care. In a decent place, as she deserves. It was clear to me that I was going to have to quit school and get a decent paying job to afford her." Here I understood the real reason she hadn't finished her education.

"A friend of mine told me about a temporary job at ROOT Inc. as a secretary where a high school diploma and a clean criminal record were enough, because they needed to fill that spot as quickly as possible. The pay seemed just right. I figured if I could then find a second job on top of that, I could move my aunt into a nice nursing home."

Sakura looked at me sadly. "So, as you already know, I got the job. And they finally offered me a permanent position." She furrowed her brow under the memory of the unpleasant encounter. "And then one day Danzo called me into his office when Kurenai, the manager I was working for at the time, went on maternity leave."

Sakura smiled at the mention of Kurenai. Kurenai was a very capable employee and Sakura clearly liked her. "Danzo offered me a job as your secretary with the understanding that I would get a raise because you were notoriously difficult to work with."

"Money first, huh?" I cut in before she could continue. She shook her head and stabbed me again with an upset look. "It was a decision! A hard decision! Sasuke-kun..." She paused. "I was given the choice of taking the job or getting fired. What would you do in my place?"

Her rhetorical question gave me an uncomfortable feeling. I hadn't thought of it that way. Actually, I hadn't thought about it at all. Now, I couldn't immediately say that I would have acted differently if I were in her situation because this had never happened to me.

I could see her eyes beginning to glisten with the tiny tears that were welling up, which she was trying her best to hold in place. "I wasn't always chasing the money." She said ashamedly. "But the higher salary meant my aunt would get the best care I could afford. The money represented an opportunity to give her the best treatment and a comfortable environment. I wanted to give her the same gift of security that she had once given me..."

A few wet tears escaped her eyes and Sakura quickly began to wipe them from her cheeks with her hand. I didn't know what to say or how to react. I absorbed her every word as carefully as my drunken state would allow.

I didn't expect this...

"I didn't care one bit how bad my life was." Her eyes suddenly took a completely different direction. Sadness and anger were replaced by determination. A determination I'd never seen in her before. "I didn't care one bit about how you make my life and my job harder. I managed to ignore your insufferable nature just to keep my job. Because the result was that I could take care of my family." I stared at her in amazement.

"I didn't spend money on clothes or nice things because I couldn't afford it. I moved into a tiny room because almost all of my paycheck went to the nursing home and treatment, shannaro!" She gritted through her teeth and shouted in frustration.

"And now for your question, Sasuke-kun..." I scrunched up my face, subconsciously sensing what she was going to say to my question about why she accepted my contract offer.

"I agreed to play your fiancée because the money you pay me guarantees that I will never have to worry about my aunt being cold, hungry or mistreated until she dies." She snorted in surrender and shook her head. "Say what you want, Sasuke-kun. Feel free to hate me, you've never made a secret of it anyway... I'll put up with anything you come up with, because this is just a job to me." She took a deep breath and wiped the last of her tears from her cheeks.

"I'm truly sorry for you feeling like I'm taking away from your place in the sun, and I'm also sorry for you acting like this..." She raised her hand and ran it from up to down, imaginatively from my head to my legs, which were barely holding themselves upright.

"You..." I wanted to oppose. I wanted to argue with her. I wanted to say that she was wrong. I wanted to say that she was talking nonsense. And I failed.

"But unfortunately, I have to let you act like this, because now I need you as much as you need me." After her speech, she turned to leave. Before she did though, she stopped in her tracks and looked over her shoulder at me.

"And if I hope you fall in love with me and I make you a better person?" She asked rhetorically again, as she shook her head. "I wouldn't even dream of such a thing." She admitted quite honestly and I just listened blankly to what she had to say.

She turned her gaze to the staircase and I closed my eyes in self-frustration. A thousand thoughts and feelings raced through my head, and I had to lean my back against the window frame as I felt the languor on my body. My head was spinning from it all. Today Sakura opened her heart and mind to me like never before. I had no idea what she had been through in her life and how she viewed our contract. Suddenly I felt ashamed of myself...

"But Sasuke-kun..." I opened my eyes in surprise. I thought she had left a long time ago, I didn't expect her to have anything else to say to me. "You need someone to love you, and someone you would love..." She said in a hushed, almost meek voice. "Your ego won't fill the void you have in your heart, you know?"

My eyes were wide as if I'd been burned. I didn't know if she meant it as an insult or if she was genuinely worried about me. My head was pounding that I couldn't hear my own thoughts. I lowered my head and gritted my teeth, praying that whatever was weighing on my chest would subside immediately. I wanted to scream, to smash things around me and let it all out. However, her voice stopped me from doing all of that.

"When this is all over..." She took a deep breath and let it out softly and very slowly. "I'll leave and start anew somewhere. It will be better for both of us if we go our own ways and never meet again." With those words, she walked up the stairs to her room, and I remained in the same spot for a long time afterwards, unable to move or speak.

-XXX-

End of Chapter 19