Chapter 148: Smashed

A husband and his wife stood next to each other against a brick wall as two shadowy figures stood before them. "I'm sure we can work something out," the husband said.

"A deal of some sort. Anything you want," said the wife.

"I always wanted a pony," said Buffy as everyone turned to see her standing calmly behind them. "Oh. You weren't really speaking to me, were you? My bad. Well, as long as I'm here ..." She ran at the shadowy figures, kicking one of them in the knees, knocking him into the light.

He's human.

"Wow," said Buffy as the man staggered back and dropped the wife's purse. "A mugging. Haven't gotten one of those for a while. Usually it's blood, and with the horror ..." She reached down for the purse. "Just a good old-fashioned mugging. Kind of sweet, actually. Well probably not for you two." She handed the wife her purse. "Here. Go. Now."

The wife took her purse and hurried off with her husband as the downed mugger jumped up and charged Buffy.

Buffy sidestepped him as she caught his arm, twisting it behind his back. The other mugger crouched down, unsure what to do. "Not too sweet for you, either, I guess," she said. "But come on, rush me. It'll be funny."

With a ferocious growl, Spike lunged out of the shadows behind Buffy toward the remaining mugger, tackling him.

"No!" Buffy yelled too late as Spike rolled off the mugger in pain, careening into a stack of crates, which fell on Buffy and her mugger. Buffy released her mugger and he and his partner raced off into the night.

"Ow!" said Spike as Buffy dusted herself off.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" asked Buffy.

"Ow," Spike said as he held his head. "Thought they were demons."

"Yeah, way to go with the keen observiness, Jessica Fletcher," quipped Buffy.

"Remind me not to help you," said Spike.

"More often?" asked Buffy with a roll of the eyes.

Spike sighed. "A little sympathy for the man with the migraine, can we ..."

"That's what you get for attacking a human," said Buffy.

"Yeah. You'd think if the government's gonna put a chip in my head, they'd at least make it so I could attack criminals and that sort," said Spike.

"Yes, 'cause muggers deserve to be eaten. You're just gonna have to get your rocks off fighting demons, Spike," said Buffy.

"There's other ways ..." said Spike.

Buffy shook her head as she turned and started to walk away. "And to that an extreme see-ya-later," she said.

"Buffy," said Spike as Buffy turned to face him.

"Spike. It's late. Can we finish this another time?" said Buffy as Spike moved in close.

"Wanna jump right to the kissing then, eh?" asked Spike.

"I'm not kissing you. Once was—" said Buffy.

"Twice," said Spike as Buffy stared him down.

"But not again," said Buffy quiestly as she walked away.

"You're a tease, Slayer," Spike called after her. "Know that? Get a fella's motor revvin', let the tension marinate a couple of days, then—bam! Crown yourself the Ice Queen."

"You need any more metaphors for that li'l mix?" asked Buffy as she continued to walk away from him.

"Only a matter of time before you realize. I'm the only one here for you, pet! You got no one else!" said Spike.

In the manor Willow walked up the stairs to the attic and toward her bed and let out a sigh. She then walked past the Book of Shadows over to the window and looked out out into the night. She could hear Amy the Rat scratching in her cage. She turned and walked back over to Amy. "Aw, whatsa matter, Amy? You lonely? We gotta get you a nice companion rat that you can love and play with and grow attached to 'til it leaves you for no good reason. Won't that be fun?" said Willow as Amy the Rat scratched a bit on her cage. "Relax—I'm joking."

Willow looked over toward the Book of Shadows. "Amy, I swear, if I could find a way to bring you back ..." said Willow as she turned back to look at the rat. "Any way."

Suddenly she heard the pages of the Book of Shadows flipping behind her as she turned and walked over to it and looked at the page it stopped on. "Hmm, maybe. What was is no longer. What was done, undo. The danger passed, the trial no more, set it right."

Suddenly the rat disappeared from it's cage and Amy appeared before Willow fully restored to her human stature, naked and dazed.

An hour later Amy sat on Willow's bed, dressed, her movements quick and twitchy. Willow entered follow by Piper who was carrying a mug as Amy jumped a little, startled.

"Hey, Piper's got you some hot chocolate, you want –"

Amy shook her head. "Mmmm-mmm. No, thanks. Still kinda queasy."

Piper set the mug down on the night stand. "Okay, maybe later. How're you –" she said as a siren went by outside. Amy's eyes dart to the open window. She made a quick hand movement, and it slammed shut.

"Hey, it's just –" said Willow as she glanced at Piper who sighed just as Amy made another hand movement, and the drapes shut, "— a siren. It's all right." She sat down on the edge of the bed. "Okay? You okay?"

Amy looked away from the window. "Mmmm-hmmmm. Yeah. Just, you know. Everything feels weird," she said as she looked at Willow and Piper. "I mean, it's like, I felt like I was in that cage for weeks."

Willow looked at Piper not sure what to say. To tell Amy that she had cast a personal gain spell and her punishment had been to trap herself in the form of a rat for years not weeks.

"But it can still be okay. Right? I can get in the swing of things. Like ... prom's coming up. I am so hoping Larry will ask me. We could make such a splash if—oh. Oh God. He hasn't asked anyone else, has he?" said Amy.

"Larry isn't that the guy at graduation that?" asked Piper as Willow nodded.

"Yeah," said Willow. "Amy. Three things we have to talk about. One, Larry's gay. Two, Larry's dead. Three, high school's ... kind of over."

"More than kind of over," said Piper. "Willow, Buffy and Xander graduated from high school about two and half years ago."

"Oh," said Amy.

Downstairs Buffy shut the door behind her as she stepped into the foyer. She looked up the stairs. "Piper, Phoebe, Paige, Willow, Dawn?" She moved toward the stairs and up into the attic. She spotted Piper on the bed. "Hey Piper, Willow there you are. Where is everyone else?"

"Phoebe is at work," said Piper. "Paige and Dawn went out for awhile. Did you see anything tonight?"

"No vamps just a good old fashioned mugging," said Buffy. "Piper … Will. Can I talk to you two about something?"

"Of course," said Piper and Willow.

"Right. Okay, you know how we all make choices, and sometimes, they're the really good kind, and sometimes they're ... less good?" said Buffy.

"Uh-huh," said Piper and Willow.

"Well, lately I ..." said Buffy as Amy walked in through the attic door, looking queasy. "Amy?"

"The whole school?" asked Amy as Willow and Piper nodded. "By a giant snake-thing." She nodded trying to take all that in. "Still adjusting. Hey, Buffy."

Buffy stared at Amy, then looked to Willow and Piper, and finally back to Amy. "Hi." She managed a confused smile as she looked at Amy. "How've you been?"

Amy shrugged. "Rat. You?"

Buffy shrugged. "Dead."

Amy nodded. "Oh."

"Well, Piper and I should let you guys catch up, we'll just –" said Buffy.

"No, it's okay, stay," said Amy. "Do you have any cookies?"

"What kind?" asked Piper.

"Any kind. Not cheese," said Amy.

"Kitchen. You want me to—" said Piper.

"No, no. I'll grab 'em," said Amy.

"Okay, well, at least let us make up the couch. It's late, you should stay here," offered Piper.

Amy smiled. "Thank you," she said as she walked out the door.

"Wow," said Buffy.

Willow nodded. "I know."

"Is she gonna be –" said Buffy.

Piper shrugged. "We don't know. She's kinda freaked out, but I would be, too."

"Wow," said Buffy.

Willow nodded. "I know. I just ... the Book started flipping and boom there it was. So what were you going to tell us? You were sounding all serious."

"Huh? Oh—nothing. I mean, the whole Amy-Rat-Amy thing? No way I'm topping that," said Buffy as she headed out the attic door and down the stairs, Piper close on her heels.

"Buffy," said Piper as Buffy turned to face her. "Something's up. What's wrong?"

"Nothing," said Buffy as she turned and headed into her room, closing the door behind her.

Piper sighed and shook her head as went down the stairs and found Amy curled up on the couch, watching TV with a plate of cookies. "How you doin', you need anything?" she asked.

Amy shook her head. "No. Thanks. Good cookies. I'm sorry about your sister."

"Thanks," said Piper.

"Crazy all the things that've happened since I went away," said Amy. "Snyder got eaten by a snake, the high school got destroyed ..." She nodded toward the TV news, then shakes her head. "People getting frozen, Willow's dating girls, and did you know about Tom and Nicole?"

"Wait ... people getting ..." said Piper as she picked up the remote and flipped to a news station.

"—in critical yet stable condition, as local authorities continue their investigation into the robbery that left one man frozen solid. Live from the Museum, Jason Manning, KCTV."

"Weird," said Amy.

"BUFFY!" shouted Piper as she turned and headed upstairs.

An hour later Phoebe, Piper and Buffy stood outside the San Francisco Museum of Natural History.

"I'll go find Darryl," said Phoebe as she walked off.

"I think we should try and find a way in. Have a look at the guard," said Buffy as Piper nodded just as the guard is wheeled out by police officers on a dolly.

Piper stopped next to Phoebe as Buffy headed off to find a place where she could flame out unseen. She wanted to get inside and look around and see what if anything was taken and why the guard was frozen. In an alley she bumped into Spike literally. "Great ..."

"Well, well, well, look who decided to show up," said Spike.

"What are you doing here?" asked Buffy.

"You know, a man was frozen alive in there," said Spike. "Little compassion, love."

"And I'm supposed to believe you just happen to be on the case?" asked Buffy.

"Buffy. I'm on everyone's case," said Spike as Buffy walked away and he turned to follow. "You know, as long as we're both here, you might as well tag along. I mean, as a team, we could –"

Buffy snorted. "Yeah, that never really seems to end well, does it?"

"It did the other night," said Spike.

"You seem awfully fixated on a couple of kisses, Spike," said Buffy.

Spike sighed. "And you seem awfully quick to forget about 'em."

"It didn't mean anything!" said Buffy as she stopped for a moment, then tried a gentler approach. "Listen, I'm sorry if you thought ... there was more."

"But –" started Spike.

"When I kissed you? You know I was thinking about Giles, right?" said Buffy as Spike looked genuinely stunned at that.

"You know, I always wondered about you two," said Spike.

"Wha ...? Oh. Eew. Spike. Gaah!" Buffy said, flustered. "He left, I was depressed, ergo vulnerability and bad kissing decisions. You need to let it go, because that's all it was, okay?"

"Did it work?" asked Spike.

"What?"

"You convince yourself?" he asked as he gave her a once over.

"Please. Stop," said Buffy as she truend to walk away.

"A man can change," said Spike.

"You're not a man," said Buffy. "You're a thing."

Spike reached out suddenly and grabbed her by the shoulder. "Stop walking away–"

"Don't touch me!" shouted Buffy as she wheeled around and slugged him. Instinctively, he hit her back knocking her to the ground.

Spike braced himself for the inevitable chip-induced pain. But it didn't come. He turned from Buffy, hiding his face from her. He doubled over, pretending to be in pain. "Owww. Owwww."

Buffy stood up, walked over to Spike punching him hard across the face as he went sprawling. "You're just a thing. An evil, disgusting thing. All right?" she said as she flamed out.

The next day Tara and Dawn each sat behind a giant milk shake. "Good God, that's a lot of shake," said Tara as Dawn slurped on her straw with abandon. Dawn's eyes keep flickering back and forth between the shake, her and Celia, who was in her stoller. "I mean, I know, big part of our day of Movie and milk shake Fun Day, but..." She stared warily at the shake. "Good God, that's a lot of shake."

"Helps to wash down the Raisinets," said Dawn.

"Promise me you'll eat something green tonight. Leafy green, not gummi green," said Tara as Dawn nodded. "Movie was fun."

"Yeah, it was ironic when all those cute inner city kids taught their coach a valuable lesson," said Dawn.

"You know I'll always be there for you, right?" asked Tara as Dawn stopped mid-slurp. "There was actually more of a lead-in when I practiced that at home."

"I know," said Dawn.

"I just, I wanted you to know. Willow and I breaking up doesn't mean you and I are still not friends. And I will never stop –" Tara said.

"I know," said Dawn with a roll of her eyes. "Do you think you'll ever get back together?"

"I wish I knew," said Tara.

"But you still love her," said Dawn.

Tara nodded. "Very much. It's just, you know. Sometimes other things get in the way."

"But, you know she misses you," said Dawn as Tara works to hold it together in front of her.

"You know what's important is that you don't ever have to worry. Our stuff is our stuff, but it never touches you. We both love you, and we both will always love you," said Tara.

"I know," said Dawn. "She's doing a lot better lately, though. She's been really good about being careful. About stuff." She went back to slurping as Tara sized Dawn up, trying to gauge how much she knows.

"Well, good. Great. That's great," said Tara.

At the Magic Box Piper, Willow, Xander and Buffy look through newspapers. "Here. Says the guard's definitely gonna live," said Piper.

"He's all thawed out now," said Xander. "They used hair-dryers. Huh."

"Everything slowed down, nervous system, circulatory system. He's still unconscious," added Willow."

Anya, searching through the bookcase, made a frustrated noise as Buffy looked over at her. "Anya?" asked Buffy.

"It's such a pain. The text I wanted? Giles took it with him. He has this thing that 'owning' a book made it, like, his 'property,'" said Anya.

"So what do we do? Call him? It's the middle of last night there. Or maybe tomorrow. Does anyone remember how that works?" said Buffy.

"It's okay. No one freak. We'll just do this another way," said Willow as Buffy, Xander and Piper each shared a look.

"Magic? I don't think we need to resort to –" said Piper as Willow pulled out her laptop from her bag and set it on the table. "Oh. Hey. Cool."

"All right, back to basics. A little old-fashioned state-of-the-art hacker action," said Xander.

"That's great, Will. Haven't seen you do that in a long time..." said Buffy as Willow placed her hands on the keyboard, and they sink into the surface. The keyboard glows faintly as she absorbs information directly from it. "Don't remember that part."

"It's quicker. It'll just take a sec to go through the files," said Willow as Piper and Buffy glance at each other. Willow goes quiet for a minute, reading the information that is being downloaded straight into her brain. "Okay. Internal police reports. A diamond was stolen last night from the museum. A big diamond. On loan from the British Museum. They're withholding the info to smoke out the bad guys. Ooh, pretty. There's a picture."

"Is it a supernatural diamond? Like, all good-lucky? Or healing powers?" said Buffy.

"Could be cursed," offered Piper.

Anya nodded in agreement. "Diamonds are excellent for cursing."

"Well, let's do some more checking, shall we?" offered Willow.

"Sure, but, you know, I am really beat. And I bet that's tiring, the ... thing you're doing there," said Xander as Willow broke her concentration and looked at Piper, Buffy and Xander. "Guys, I'm fine, really. What's the deal with–"

"Oh, for crying out loud. This is bizarre. You're all la la with the magic and the not-talking, like everything's normal, when we all know that Tara up and left you and now everyone's scared to say anything to you," said Anya. "Except me." She looked at Xander. "Is this that thing I do that you comment on sometimes?"

"Guys, it's okay. It's hard, but—but it's better this way, believe me," said Willow. "Little things started taking over, things that don't matter, but we saw them differently, and so they got blown out of proportion." Not a single one of them seemed convinced by what Willow was saying. "The time apart is gonna help us sort through that. Really. Now let's keep working on this. I don't want to leave Amy alone in the manor so long."

"Amy. Is she... how is she adjusting?" asked Xander.

"We're not really sure," said Piper.

"It's a lot to take in," added Willow. "I keep expecting her to do, like, ratty stuff, licking her hands clean or shredding newspaper or making little pellets in the corner."

"Let's definitely not leave her alone in the manor too long," said Buffy as Piper nodded in agreement.

Later Willow and Piper entered the manor, trying not to disturb Amy ... who's not there. "Amy ...?"

Amy emerged from the kitchen, clearly restless. "God, you're back, I thought you said you wouldn't be gone that long."

"We weren't, I mean, I thought we were –" Willow said.

Amy nodded. "Let's go somewhere."

"Don't you wanna go see your dad or –" Piper suggested.

Amy shook her head. "No. Can't. Not yet. Too many questions."

Willow sighed as she glanced at Piper. "About where you were."

"No, about how I got there," Amy said. "Wish I could just make him forget about the last three years." She sighed. "I just don't wanna deal with him right now, I'd be so ... bored.

"Why don't you take her to Payson's P5, Willow," Piper suggested.

Willow nodded. "Okay."

Two hours later Dawn and Tara came in through the front door of the Manor.

"Hello! Piper, Phoebe, Paige, Buffy I'm home!" Dawn called out.

Piper came out of the kitchen, "Shh! Celia and Wyatt are asleep."

"Where's everyone else?" Dawn asked.

"Buffy is at the Magic Box. Paige has a date. Phoebe is working late. And Willow took Amy out to Payson's P5," Piper said. "Hello, Tara."

"Hi, Piper. Whose Amy?" Tara said.

"You know her. The one that spent the last three years in a cage," Piper said.

Tara's eyes went wide. "Willow finally found a way to reverse Amy's spell?"

Piper nodded. "Yeah.

"Well, then I should probably get back," Tara said.

"Dawn, why don't you shimmer Tara home," Piper said. "It's getting late."

"Of course," Dawn said as she took Tara's hand and shimmered out.

At the Magic Box Xander sat with Buffy and Anya in the deserted shop, surrounded by thumbed-through texts. "Ah ha! I got it! Here's our villain right here." Anya and Buffy looked at the open page, and then returned to their own books. "What?"

"Sweetie, that's a D&D manual," Anya said.

"But, I could've... oh," Xander said.

Anya smiled. "Let's admit it—we can't find this thing because it doesn't exist. There's no such thing as a frost monster who eats diamonds."

Buffy sighed. "Well maybe he doesn't eat diamonds. Maybe he just ... thinks they're pretty." She closed her book, feeling lame. "We suck."

Xander nodded. "We need new brains. What's up with Willow?"

"Out with Amy, I guess," Buffy said.

"Great. Someone to do more magic with," Anya said as Buffy glared at her. "Present company excluded of course."

Buffy nodded. "Anyways ... she's not cooped up and crying, that's forward momentum. I don't know everything that happened with Tara, but Willow was –"

Xander sighed. "Tara thinks Willow was doing too much magic. She's not the only one."

Buffy sighed. "I know. Piper, Phoebe, Paige and I have been thinking the same thing. But I think she'll be fine. This is Willow, she of the level head."

"Those are the ones you have to watch out for the most. Responsible types," Anya said.

"Right. Cause they might go all crazy and start alphabetizing everything," Buffy said as she glared at Anya again.

"I'm serious," Anya said. "Responsible people try so hard to be good all the time—when they get a taste of being bad, they can't get enough. It's like—kablooey!"

"That's not true—" Buffy said.

"Okay, not kablooey. More like BAM!" Anya said.

Xander nodded. "It is human nature, Buff. Will's getting a taste of something powerful, way bigger than her."

"Have you two forgotten who I am?" Buffy asked. "Piper, Phoebe, Paige, Dawn and I are supposed to be the most powerful witches in the world."

"We understand where your going, Buffy," Xander said. "But Will isn't a powerful as you, Piper, Phoebe, Paige and Dawn are. She isn't used to this much power."

"I guess you have a point," Buffy said. "Piper and I are keeping an eye on her though." Just then the phone rang and she moved to answer it. "Hello?"

"Slayer."

"Spike?" Buffy asked.

"Meet me at the cemetery. Twenty minutes. Come alone," Spike said.

Buffy sighed. "Spike?"

"Bloody hell, yes, it's me," Spike said.

"You're calling me on the phone?" Buffy asked.

"Just be there," Spike said.

Buffy shook her head. "Why, are you helping again? You have a lead on the Frost Monster thingie?"

"Something like that, yeah. Kinda thought you might be up for a little grunt work," Spike said.

"What?" Buffy said, misinterupting what he said. "No! No grunting."

"I was talking shop, love. But if you've other ideas ... You and me ... Cozy little tomb with a view—" Spike said.

Buffy abruptly hung up on Spike as she looked at Xander and Anya.

"What did Captain Peroxide want?" Xander asked.

"Nothing. He wanted to ... patrol," Buffy said. "But I told him that I would not."

An hour later Buffy, Xander and Anya are leaving for the night

"I'm telling you, I think there's just something about this thing," Buffy said.

Xander shrugged. "I dunno, Buff, feels like we've been through every book."

"Yes, even the ones that aren't so boring you want to kill yourself," Anya said.

"We have those?" Xander asked.

"I'm just saying. All the things that've happened lately, a bank robbery, a jewel heist," Buffy said.

Xander nodded. "Exploding lint."

"They just ... is it me, or do they all seem really –" Buffy started.

"Lame?" Anya finished.

"I was going for unusual, but yeah," Buffy said as they all stare out into the night, thinking. "I dunno. I'll do a quick patrol, then, tomorrow, after a good night's sleep, we solve this."

"Optimism. I remember optimism," Anya said.

"That's 'cause you're a thousand," Xander said.

Buffy smiled. "Night, guys."

"Night," Xander said as he and Anya head toward home.

Buffy turned and headed off the other way to patrol. She got about ten feet before Spike stepped out of the shadows. "Slayer," he said.

Buffy sighed. "And so my night is now complete."

Spike began to circle her, menacing. "You never showed."

"Sorry. Little busy actually doing stuff," Buffy said.

Spike nodded. "You shouldn't be so flip, love."

"Why, what are you gonna do, walk behind me to death?" Buffy asked as Spiked moved in closer to her.

"I'm just saying, things might be a little different now. You oughta be careful," Spike said.

Buffy tried to get around him, but he wasn't letting her pass. "Enough! Enough, move."

"Or what?" Spike asked. Buffy punched him in the face. He doesn't fall, he doesn't back up. He slowly turned back to her. Getting pissed as he punched her right back. "Ohh, the pain, the pain ... is gone." Buffy's eyes go wide as she realized the threat he now represents. "Guess what I just found out. Looks like I'm not as toothless as you thought, sweetheart."

"How?" Buffy asked.

Spike smiled. "Don't you get it? Don't you see? You came back wrong."

Buffy advanced as she punched and kicked Spike down the street, eventually taking them in front of a condemned house. Spike casually and easily matched Buffy, punching right back. "It's a trick. You did something to the chip, it's a trick."

"No trick. It's not me. It's you," Spike said as he slapped Buffy, hard and repeatedly. "It's just you, that's the funny part. You're the one who changed, that's why this doesn't hurt me. Came back a little less human than you were."

Using the distance, Buffy kicked Spike hard in the chest. He flew up against the wall of the house. He rushed Buffy as she swung at him, he swung right back, connecting with her jaw.

"See? Doesn't hurt," Spike said.

Buffy socked him in the jaw right back. "See? Yes it does." She threw punch after punch, wailing on Spike, pushing him back, back, back toward the house and inside. As they fight, they move from room to room. She threw one hard punch that sent Spike sprawling into the bare dining room beneath a chandelier.

Spike laughed. "Oh, poor little lost girl," he said as he leapt into the air and grabbed hold of the chandelier, swinging from it to kick Buffy square in the face. She doesn't fit in anywhere, she has no one to love." He jumped down.

Buffy slammed him into the staircase. "Me? I'm lost? Look at you, you idiot. Poor Spikey. Can't be a human, can't be a vampire. Where the hell do you fit in?" She threw him into the living room, against the brick fireplace. "Your job is to kill the Slayer, but all you do is follow me around, making moon-eyes –"

"I'm in love with you," Spike said.

Buffy shook her head. "You're in love with pain. Admit it. You like me because you enjoy getting beat down. So who's really screwed up?"

"Hello! Vampire! I'm supposed to be treading on the dark side," Spike said as he threw her into a wall, punching a hole in it. He slammed her to the floor, then pinned her there. "What's your excuse?"

Buffy grabbed his face, pushed him, by sheer force of brute strength, off of herself and threw him against the opposite wall before flying at him. She kicked Spike into the living room wall, rushing to him as she threw punches at him.

Spike blocked everyone of her punched as he laughed. "I wasn't planning to hurt you. Much."

"You haven't come close to hurting me," Buffy said.

"Afraid to give me the chance?" Spike asked as he pushed Buffy back. He leapt at her as she spun him into the dining room pinning him against the wall. "Afraid I'm gonna –"

Just then Buffy kissed Spike, hard, and as he kissed back, she punched the wall above them when cracked and began to crumble. They spin away from the wall and slam into the opposite wall as Spike pressed Buffy against the plaster causing it to crack as well.

Buffy shoved Spike away and pushed off the wall as the crack spread up to the ceiling causing plaster to fall and the chandelier to wobble. She landed upright against Spike, pinning him to a post as she kissed him desperately, angrily.

They look at each other, both surprised. They start moving rhythmically as fissures form in the wood floor. The chandelier comes crashing down, barely missing them. They keep kissing, still rolling, moving in sync as the floor beneath them gives way, and they crash through into the basement as everything around them continues to break, fall and crack...