Heather never came over last night and Joan was feeling like a bag of skittles where each color was a different emotion.
The first thing she had done was call the pool where Heather's manager answered that she had left with Billy last night and then called in sick today, something Heather never did. The second thing Joan did was call the Holloway Household and had to cover for Heather because she never came home.
"Oh hey, Joan! Did you and Heather have a good time last night?"
"Yes, the best! Just calling to let you know we're going to, uh, the mall. She'll, ah, be home later."
"You two girls have fun!"
Joan stared at the ceiling of her bedroom from the circular carpet on her floor and tapped a beat on the fuzz. Heather was fine, she called in today, but she was last seen with Billy last night which meant she must have spent the night with him.
On one had she was happy her friend finally got what she wanted but on the other she could have at least called! Joan had stayed up the entire night waiting for her friend and now she was exhausted to the point that no amount of concealer could hide it.
"It's 9:01 in the morning Jo!" Her bedroom door started to nearly cave from the constant knocks that brought her out of her worrying. "Jo? Jo? Jo? Jo?"
She took a deep breath and let it out slowly before pushing herself up in hopes that she could get any feeling of patience inside of her. Throwing open the door she didn't even laugh with Dustin fell forward in surprise. "What?!"
Quickly picking himself up Dustin looked at his sister expectantly. "You said you'd take me to the mall today to hang out with Steve while you and Heather did whatever girls do at the mall."
"So you woke me up at 9 in the morning?!"
"You said not to wake you up before 9 in the morning so I waited until exactly 9:01 to begin the process of waking you up." Dustin looked over his sister and confusion spread across his face, before acceptance. "But looks like you already are." He looked into the bedroom. "Where's your hot friend?"
Joan rolled her eyes and went over to her vanity to fix her hair and make up. "Never showed up."
"Why?" Dustin took the open door as invitation and once again occupied her bed, but quickly threw his feet off at the evil look sent his way. "Finally realized she was out of your league?"
"She had a date with a boy." Joan said simply, her face elongated while she put on mascara. "I guess the date went... well."
"What, did he take her home and meet her parents or something?"
Joan snorted and capped her mascara, fluffing up her hair. "Or something."
Dustin pondered the or something for a few moments before it hit and his body physically reacted with a cringe and loud groan. "Oh gross, Jo. That's digusting."
The car ride was quick and without much fighting, just the normal amount. Dustin had almost opened her console to get a tape out, but she fought to keep it closed, forcing him to listen to Dolly Partin's country voice. She didn't want him to see the music she hid from Hawkins.
"Good, God. Do you listen to anything else?!" He complained when they reached the parking lot and Joan scoffed. Of course she listened to other things, but she wasn't going to be the next town pariah.
"Whatever Dustin. Let's just go, maybe I can take you to get ice cream and then we can han-"
"No!" Dustin shouted with wide eyes and outstretched hands, shaking his head aggressively before panicking at the frown on Joan's face. "I-I meant, uh, well its just, uh... Steve!"
What was with Dustin's obsession with Steve?!
"I-I mean, I just think its for the best if you don't come to hang out with Steve and I, with the recent break up and the new girl-"
"Dustin, I really don't-"
"I'm just saying Steve probably doesn't want to see you. It would make things awkward!" Dustin quickly raced out of the car and Joan's heart twitched, feeling hurt that he wanted to get away from her. She gripped the steering wheel a little tighter than usual and looked at the windshield with a scowl. "I don't think you hanging out with us would be a good thing."
"Right, whatever. I didn't want to hang out with a nerd like you anyways. You talk too much and my ears are ringing." Joan snapped out probably more venomous than she wanted to judging by the hurt that washed over Dustin's face. She was tired, cranky, and honestly a little upset that no one wanted to hang out with her today. She leaned over the passenger seat with a glare and slammed the door close.
"W-wait, when are you coming back?"
Joan rolled down the window half way and shouted, while driving away. "Ask Steve for a ride home!"
The rest of the day was Joan waiting on Heather to call her and tell her what happened last night, but the more she waited the worse her thoughts got.
She tried to play the piano, practicing a few songs she tried to remember from her time period, so that she'd distract herself from the guilt eating her mind silly. She sang loudly the lyrics, no where near as angry sounding with the piano behind the vocals, but it was the only thing that kept her from freaking out.
It was late and the familiar summer rain was harsh, for a split moment Joan worried for her brother, but pushed it aside when she remembered how easily he threw her off for Steve.
She was going to punch Uncle Steve in the arm next time she saw him.
When the sun was gone and she hadn't heard from Heather, Joan decided to take matters in her own hands. Throwing on her rain jacket and shouting to her mom she was leaving for Heather's, Joan started her drive to Heather's with a million and one thoughts going through her head almost painfully.
Thankfully, the girls lived in neighborhoods close to each other.
The familiar red door popped up, and Joan parked while staring at it. Her car was home, so why hadn't she called? Joan raced over to it, knocking on the door perhaps a little too frantically. If Heather wasn't there she'd have to tell the truth about everything and the knot in her stomach kept growing at all the possibilities of what if what if what if...
What if she wasn't okay?
Once again the bad thoughts came and Joan hated herself with every hour long second she waited for any signs of life to come through that door. Oh God, what if she wasted valuable investigating time by lying to the Holloways? What if Heather was already gone? What if-
"Joan?"
"Oh, God." Joan immediately grabbed Heather for a firm hug and sighed in relief. "You have no idea how worried I was about you." For a moment, Joan just gripped Heather and held back the tears because she refused to look weak. Her voice was a just a whisper, ignoring that Heather hadn't hugged her back. "Don't worry, Heath. I told them you were at my house last night, but you need to tell me-"
"Heather?"
Joan paused, looking over Heather's shoulder to see a smiling Billy Hargrove properly clothed walking into the foyer. "Please tell me I'm dreaming." Joan pulled back from the hug and gestured over towards Billy. "Is Hargrove in your house?"
"Yes." Heather said with a smile, stepping back so that Billy's arms wove around her waist in a rather light show of attraction considering it was Billy. "We were just about to have dinner."
"Joan, is that you sweetheart?" Heather's mother came next with a large grin on her face, swooping of Joan for a hug and giving the teen a kiss on the cheek. "Oh, it is so good to see you, sweetheart. Heather was introducing her boyfriend Billy over lunch."
Joan's eyebrows shot up and she tried to make eye contact with Heather for any sort of help, but all Heather did was just stare and smile while still in Billy's arms. They looked like uncanny valley mannequins in a horror movie, and Joan was concerned that maybe Billy was... using her.
"Uh, right, boyfriend."
"Is that our favorite Henderson?" Heather's dad joked, coming in to join the party with a hearty laugh and giving the girl a small hug around the shoulders. "You joinin' us for lunch?"
"O-oh, no." Joan trailed off, looking over at Heather. Heather would have been looking at her, trying to get her to leave so she would embarrass her in front of Billy, but Heather didn't even look... opposed to it at all. "I-I just came to drop off something she left last night-"
"Oh come on, Joan." Billy was the one to interrupt her attempt to excuse herself, untangling his arms and walking over to be a little too close to Joan with a smile. Her frown contradicted his own facial expression as he threw an arm around her should like they were bestfriends. "As our best friend, you should join us! We still have some brownie that you made on the counter."
"Here, Hargrove."
"What the hell is that, Henderson? Shit log in a bag?"
"It's called a brownie, but honestly I like that name better."
"What, don't like your own cookin'? Makes me scared to eat it myself."
"I don't like brownies, but if you want me to take it back I will."
Joan frowned as she was led to the table and Heather made quick work to set another spot for her. Something felt sticky, volatile, and it reminded her of something dangerous that made her hair stand up but she couldn't remember what the feeling reminded her of.
A glass was set out in front of her and she frowned at it. She looked up at Heather's weird Barbie smile and grabbed the glass, wondering if she had done something wrong.
"Thank you, uh, Heath."
"Of course, Joan!"
Joan didn't like tea unless it was hot. With a smile, she leaned back and emptied the cup in the plant behind her. She'd go grab some tap water in a bit.
And Heather was off back to the kitchen to finish cooking - she recognized the smell of the chicken and broccoli risotto - and Joan took a sip, trying to pretend she like that drink and wash down the sick feeling in her stomach. Her throat was dry and she tried to engage Heather's dad in pleasantries.
"Are you excited for school?"
"O-of course! Heather and I tried to sign up for similar classes together."
As far as she could tell, Heather's parents were absolutely normal, but Billy and Heather were just too weird. Billy acted like he knew Joan, but their contact was limited to side comments and insults with occasional trade offs of a brownie for a coke. That was it.
The more she stared at Billy the more she felt like she needed to get out of there. Grab Heather, throw her in the car, and drive somewhere. Drive anywhere else but here, far far away to maybe Washington and start a new life there. The way Billy looked over at Heather with nothing in his eyes and Heather return it, they worked together like they were twins.
Heather didn't have to say anything when Billy grabbed the knife and went to finish cutting a tomato, while Heather grabbed a cup from his hand that he had gotten without her asking. Billy looked dangerous, more dangerous than usual, and the idea of moving to Washington grew stronger.
Fuck Washington, they were going to Portugal.
There was nothing normal about Billy and Heather, and Joan was started to feel more and more like prey in a predator's den.
"Joan, sweetie, everything okay?"
Joan's head snapped over to Mr. Holloway's concerned face, tried not to cough at the cigar smoke in her face, and nodded her head quickly.
"Then why are you squeezing that knife and staring at Billy like you're Heather's father?" It was a joke, a terrible joke, but Heather's dad had dancing eyes and a teasing grin while he lowered his voice and leaned in as if it was a secret. Joan's eyes dipped down to see that her steak knife was gripped to a point that her hand was numb. "You don't like this Billy guy, eh? Or is it that you don't don't like him?"
Swallowing down the lump in her throat, Joan set down the knife with an attempted grin and chuckled, trying to imagine that Heather and Billy were not staring at her with the ominous chop chop chop in the background.
"N-no way, sir. Hargrove and I just have a..." Joan trailed off trying to figure out the right word for their relationship. They weren't friends, they weren't enemies. They saw each other frequently enough, but they always referred to the other by their last name.
"Henderson, we banned freeloaders years ago."
"Oh man, I thought being an asshole was so '83. But you just keep proving me wrong, huh?"
"Just acquaintances." She said quietly, glancing around the corner at the duo for a second and once again feeling like she should never have let go of the knife. "I just want the best for Heather."
"Don't we all." Heather's dad chuckled, leaning back in his chair and returning to the cigar and paper. "Billy seems good for her. Strong man, hard worker, clear goals. Everything she needs."
Joan bit her lip and went to spill the beans that Billy was not a good guy, but then the boy joined her at the table sitting in between her and Heather's father. It looked normal, but it felt... intimidating. It felt like a silencer, a physical way to say shut up with a grin on his face,
Heather joined the table, setting the last dish out, and smiled at Joan. Without her eyes.
"Let's join hands for prayer."
The Holloway's weren't religious, Joan thought to herself as Billy grabbed her and she grabbed Heather's mom. She tried not to think about how fucking cold Billy was as if he had just stuck his hands in a bucket of ice and focused on the Holloway patriarch's prayer recital, but the itch got stronger.
"Give us grateful hearts."
Joan risked an opened eye and looked down at the hand in her own, swallowing the 30th time in distress and wished she could run far far away.
"O Father, for all thy mercies."
Red. Angry red. His hand was an angry red and freezing cold similar to when her and her dad would spend hours build forts and battling in the snow. But, it was mid-summer, hot, muggy Hawkins rain.
"And make us mindful of thee"
Billy's hand squeezed hers and Joan had to hold a gasp, eyes darting up to see dark eyes glaring down at her. Very carefully his lips shaped together and a silent shhh left him as if they were sharing a secret between siblings. Joan looked back down and stared wide-eyed at her knees.
"Through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen."
What the fuck was going on?