Brann had marched deep into the jungle, his merry horde of murderous minions by his side as he stomped his way through the jungle. As he explored, he started to hear the voices of empire troops complaining about one thing or another.
"These wretched spiders are everywhere."
"Ya, scuttering about like they own the place."
"They can keep it as far as I'm concerned!"
"Well... Maybe not the beach."
"Yeah, obviously not the beach. The sooner I can get onto a warm towel with a cocktail in my hand, the better!" At the end of that rather stupid conversation, Brann chose to attack, but so did the spiders.
"Spidies!"
"Greens love spidies!"
"Awww, they just seem so very huggable, don't they, sire? Hmmm, the greens seem rather taken with them. But these seem more aggressive than normal. something must be controlling them."
"I agree, Gnarl. Not about the huggable part. The gross fucks are almost as ugly as you are! But about them being controlled, that is not hunting behaver." Brann then chopped down every empire troop and spider that dared oppose him. As he caved a path of death and destruction through the imperial forces, he found some rather nasty brutes were deployed as well.
"More Eradicators. I guess magical creators don't have an invitation to their party."
"Like that ever fucking stopped me, Gnarl!" Brann said as he charged forth. He willed his greens to take care of the Eradicators while the rest of his horde dealt with the regular troops. After claiming the spell catalyst that was just lying about, Brann looked to explore a strange temple, with a familiar spider crawling all over it.
"That's the spider that sank your boat! It's huge. Must be a queen! I suspect the elves are using them against the empire. She must be controlling the little ones. You should go deeper into the temple to investigate, sire."
"Ya, I'm going to kill that bitch if it's the last thing I do!" Brann said in rage as he looked for a way to get to it. Discovering that a keystone was needed.
"More keystones! I don't know why they can't use a piece of metal like everyone else. Trust elves to be unnecessarily complicated!" Brann grumbled a similar sentiment, just knowing that he would need the keystone that was already there to get the second one, so he took it with him as he explored. AND HE WAS FUCKING RIGHT! His bad mood was only exasperated as the all-to-familiar form of queen Fay popped into existence before his eyes.
"So, you seek to spread your darkness further afield, Scourge of Nature?"
"Actually, me and your friend and or lesbian life partner, Luna, had a deal. I reclaim your lands for you, and you stay out of my way, providing any minor assistance you can while I crush the empire!"
"We have no such bargain! Nor would I believe you would keep your word if we did, beast! But you are too late. I have found a new place where all creatures of light magic can exist in safety. The Last Sanctuary."
"The very name reeks of how pathetic your resistance against the empire really is! No wonder Luna sought out my aide, seeing how poorly you have defended your own people."
"Your mockery means nothing. Please accept my parting gift, for we shall not meet again." She then teleported away. In her place, a massive forest troll appeared and started to attack.
"Quite the kingly gift, fuck'em up, boys!" The minions then charged the troll, the browns attacking head-on, the reds pelting it with fire from a distance, and the greens sneaking around to stab it in the back. The brute took a few moments to take down, but it was an easy enough kill with the halo spell charging up the minions. Grabbing up the keystone, Brann was on his merry way, that is, until the empire ambushed him.
"We've been looking for this temple for some time, and thanks to you, we've found it. Now we can capture that spider queen and get her in the arena, can't we, boys? Hmmm... Maybe you too?"
"You've got the drop on me; I'll give you that. Now surrender, and not only will I let you live, but incorporate you into my army."
"Do you really expect me to do that, demon Lord?"
"No, I expected you to be distracted long enough for my greens to stab you in the back." The legit was about to respond but was cut off by blood gushing forth from his mouth. The greens them moved on to the archers, then Brann descended upon the remaining empire forces. He accepted the late surrender of the last four soldiers and had them sent to the Netherworld for processing. He then used the keystones to activate the bridge to the Spider Temple.
"It just puzzles me why they didn't set up the bridge activation things on the other side of the bridge. Did they want invaders to get in this easy?"
"The elves we're probably so arrogant that they believed no invader would ever get this far. Stupid creaturs!" Gnarl spat as Brann chopped his way through wave after wave of spiders charging at him in suicidal fervor. Brann was able to fight his way to the temple entrance, only for the floor to fall out from under him. He was able to control his fall and land unharmed, the spider queen waited for him, her fangs dripping with venom.
"Come here, you beautiful beasty! Kelda is going to have her work cut out for her stuffing your fat ass!" The spider then jumped onto the wall and threw a wiggling egg sack. Using newborn as a projectile slightly disturbed Brann, but some of the minions in his horde were born last week, so he was not winning any parent of the year awards either. She darted from one side of the wall to the next, and the reds fire didn't stick to the beast's exoskeleton.
"You'll never be able to make an effective attack unless you find a way to get her off the walls, master!"
"Thank you, Gnarl! I would never have thought of that if yo-" Just then, Brann stepped on a button, water began to shoot out of the wall the spider queen was on, forcing her the land on her back before him. Brann wasted no time in attacking the bitches legs, chopping two off before the monster go up. He willed his minions to start piling onto the remaining legs, slowing the beast down enough to get a few more limbs off with his ax. Then all it took was a blast of magic to force it onto its back. Brann then jumped into the air, slicing the spider queen open from chin to web shooter, killing it, and releasing a small swarm of giant spiders. The greens then immediately started petting, rubbing, and playing with the creepy things. It was almost cute.
"Now you've killed their queen, those spiders don't dare attack you. Still, they make an adorable combination with your greens."
"Ya, they kinda remind me of how browns behave with their wolf mounts. In fact..." Brann then willed a green to mount a spider, and not only did the spider not mind, but the green was able to assert complete control.
"With these new mounts, your minions will be able to climb into areas that you can't reach, Lord. Maybe your newfound friends can help you out of that pit, Lord!"
"Meh, worth a shot." After what felt like hours of trying to figure out the overly complex elvish engineering puzzles, Brann, at last, made his way out of the horrible temple.
"I want someone to head in there and harvest as many spider eggs as possible. We don't have a way to breed more unless a queen egg is found."
"Right away, sire!' Gnarl said as Brann tested his spiders against every Eradicator he came across, and they proved very effective. He then used the spiders to open the way to the empire colony, but was not ready to go there just yet.
"Gnarl, I want our spies inside the colony to begin sabotaging the defenses. Have the governess start doubling patrols in regions that we control, and have the proper welcome for the unsuspecting fools. And have the other women get ready to make a menace of themselves as well... And against my better judgment, inform our contact in Luna's army to begin preparations for the attack."
"Are you sure that is wise? The elves have proven not to be trustworthy!"
"There is a schism forming in their ranks, Gnarl. Worst case scenario, this has all been some kind of poorly set up trap, in which case we get to kill elves. Best case scenario, we can use that schism to shatter the forces of good, maybe even get the knife ears to kill each other, now that would be worth a laugh!"
"Oh, I just love how your wicked mind works, master. Always looking on the dark side of life! I'll send out a messenger now." Brann then returned to the Netherworld to help make preparations for the battle to come.
...
"YOU TRIED TO KILL HIM WITH A TROLL!?" Luna screamed as Fay, the fairy queen simply sat on her throne and rolled her eyes at her friend's outrage.
"What? You said you wanted me to integrate some of the non-evil but not necessarily good creatures into my forces. Honestly, I don't know what you want from me anymore."
"Look, I've been trying to explain this as simply as I can. We, need, him. It is better in the long run if we have our enemies kill each other than waste the blood of our own when we don't need to!" Fay levitated from her throne and moved to her window.
"The Overlord is not our friend, Luna."
"We don't need friends. We need soldiers. We need a buffer so we can rebuild and reorganize. We-" Just then, a harpy flew in, gasping and wheezing. She seemed to have been in a rush.
"My queen's! The Overlord has sent word that he is making the necessary preparations for driving the empire from Everlight and invites us to join him as allies in battle.
"Whew, thank the goddess that your rash actions have not burned the bridges I have built with him. Send word back that-"
"Are you a fool, Luna!? This is clearly a trap. We will charge in, do most of the heavy fighting, then when the empire is defeated. He will slaughter anyone we send!" Luna moved her hand over her eyes. She was done with this.
"Fay, I love you as if you were a second mother to me. But this is the only chance we have of reclaiming Everlight. I will take the entirety of the night guard and personally reclaim our lands!" Fay looked as horrified as if someone had just thrown Luna's severed head at her feet.
"No... NO! I forbid you from fighting at the side of that monster!"
"I am a queen in my own right, Fay. I will no longer bow to your authority on such matters. When I have secured your people's kingdom for you, I hope you will be more open to reason." Luna said in a hauntingly calm voice as the temperature in the room dropped to below freezing, and the young queen's skin turned as pale as snow. She then turned and left the throne room, ignoring Fay's protests as she made herself and her people ready for war.