AN: So the first half of this chapter didn't exist until a couple weeks ago, with the latter two segments originally tacked onto the end of the last chapter. But you guys seemed to want a glimpse of family life, so…here you go!
Chapter 9: Blending Families
The days and nights you sit around wondering where can
She be
Hoping that she might appear, out of nowhere
But you fail to see
All the hurt inside, the wounded pride
Ooh what she went through for you
You cheated and lied, as her love slowly died
And her heart just broke in two
When she was with you, all along
Behind you right or wrong
She tried to hold on, hold on
But you went too far, and she's gone
And now it's over and her heart turns to stone
No time for pity, when her heart turns to stone
She cries a little as her heart turns to stone
She's that kind of woman
She'll do fine on her own
What you thought was a game
A game you were winning
Wouldn't go your way
Now you've lost what you had
And your back to beginning
It's the price you have to pay
She hides the pain
But her heart turns to stone
No time for pity
When her heart turns to stone
She cries sometimes
As her heart turns to stone
She's that kind of woman
She'll get by on her own
Yeah it's over
And her heart turns to stone
Don't look for pity now
When her heart turns to stone
Listen to her cry
Listen to her cry
She's a woman now
Ooh it's a sad thing to see
To see a heart turn to stone
The heart of a woman
A heart turned to stone
– "Heart Turns to Stone" by Foreigner
Nanboku Chou Period, Shouhei Era 5th Year/Kannou Era 2nd Year (1351 CE)
Touga looked up as the door to the courtyard slid open and Inuyasha toddled inside, clutching his ball. "Mommy, mommy!" he called out, tossing the ball aside and running for Izayoi as she sat sewing more clothes for their growing boy.
"What is it, baby?" Izayoi asked setting aside her work just in time for Inuyasha to plow into her embrace.
"What's a big brudder?"
Izayoi's brows creased. "Well, a big brother is someone who's older than you that has the same mommy and daddy. Just like a little brother is someone younger than you who has the same parents."
"Oh, I see. Then I want a big brudder! How do I get one?"
Touga lowered the book he was reading and met Izayoi's troubled gaze. Her eyes seemed to be asking, How do we talk about this?
He didn't know. Despite having raised a child before, Touga found it hadn't prepared him for all the different experiences that came with raising Inuyasha, especially since he now stayed at home full-time.
"What's all this now about wanting a brother?" Touga asked, putting down his favorite book, The Art of War. It was an original copy transcribed on bamboo tiles he had brought over from the mainland centuries ago.
Inuyasha squirmed until he seated himself squarely in Izayoi's lap while facing Touga. "Evwy day, Soichi-kun plays ball wif dis boy he calls 'big brudder,' and den dey go home togedder. I don't have no one to play wif, so I want a big brudder too."
"Sweetheart, what do you mean you have no one to play with? There are lots of children in town," Izayoi said, stroking his long, white hair.
That had been part of the reason they had decided to relocate to a more populated area after their manor burned down. Izayoi wanted playmates for Inuyasha, and Touga hoped that in the hubbub of humanity, they might not only draw less attention from demonic threats but the less superstitious city-folk might be more accepting of a peaceful demon walking amongst them. Indeed, Touga could often get lost in the crowd just by wearing a wide-brimmed hat. Few strangers gave him a second glance. He had chosen the home of the rebellious Southern Court in Yoshino, not wanting to deal with the entrenched politics of the capitol in Kyoto—or the battles that the Southern Court fought there.
Their neighbors knew what he was, of course, but then, the size of their estate leant a certain prestige to their household that city-goers admired—and envied.
Inuyasha shook his head. "Dey don't wanna play wif me. Dey're scared I'll bite."
Touga narrowed his eyes at Inuyasha. "Have you bitten them, Inuyasha?"
Inuyasha turned away from Touga and burrowed into Izayoi's voluminous kimono.
"Inuyasha, answer me," Touga growled.
A muffled, "Once. No…twice," came out. Inuyasha then peeked back at his father with glassy eyes and mumbled, "Kenji-kun and Taro-kun kept pulling my ears. I…I told dem to stop, but dey didn't, and it hurt, so…I bit dem. Dey told evwybody I was a mean dog." He sniffed.
"Oh, sweetie, when did this happen?" Izayoi asked.
"I dunno. A while ago."
"Why didn't you say something?" Izayoi continued, rubbing his abused ears.
"I…I didn't want…Daddy to…to y-yell at meee," Inuyasha whined, starting to cry.
"Oof, come here, you," Touga grunted, hauling his pup out of Izayoi's arms and rubbing his back as he cried. "I'm not going to yell at you."
"Y-You're not?"
"No. You stood up for yourself. There's nothing wrong with that."
"But," Izayoi interjected, pinning Touga with a look, "you shouldn't hurt those weaker than you. You know you're stronger than them, so it should have been easy enough to brush them off and walk away. Isn't that right?"
"Yes, Mommy," Inuyasha murmured.
Touga bit his tongue. The older Inuyasha got, the more Touga was realizing just how different raising a child with a human was. He and Izayoi had very different ideas about what was appropriate for a child to play and learn. She wanted Inuyasha nowhere near swords until he was older. Touga compromised by making Inuyasha a wooden sword that was crafted well enough to practice with but that wouldn't harm anyone—including himself—too badly.
He did agree though that Inuyasha needed to reign in his demonic tendencies around humans. Their family lived among them in a tenuous peace. But Touga would never forget how even humans who purported to be friends could betray one in the end.
Inuyasha sniffed and looked up at him, fisting his kimono. "But…if I had a big brudder, I would always have someone to play wif, right? So…can I have one, Daddy?"
Touga chewed over his words. He had yet to tell Inuyasha about Sesshoumaru. He knew he would have to one day, but was this really the time?
Unfortunately, Sesshoumaru is not the type of brother Inuyasha imagines having.
Izayoi broke in before he could. "Sweetie, I'm sorry, but Mommy and Daddy can't give you a brother."
"Why not?" Inuyasha demanded.
Izayoi rubbed his back. "Well, you see…Mommy can't have any more babies."
"Why not?"
Touga stared at his wife in concern. What exactly was she planning on telling Inuyasha? Touga didn't even want to think about going through The Talk again so soon. It was five hundred years too early for Inuyasha to know anything about sex.
"You know what karma is, don't you?" his wife continued.
Inuyasha screwed up his face in thought. "It's when you do bad fings, so bad fings happen to you."
"Yes, and when you do good things, good things happen to you in return. Mommy must have gotten some bad karma in her last life, because she tried for a long, long time to have a baby, but she couldn't. Mommy prayed and prayed that in exchange for all the good karma she had built up in this life, the gods might give her a baby…and finally, they blessed her with a perfect little boy with doggie ears."
"Dat's me!" Inuyasha announced.
Izayoi rubbed noses with him. "Yes, that's you, sweetie."
Touga's heart panged as he listened to her explanation. It was a clever way to deflect the complex truth from their child, but her words didn't sound as if she had come up with them in the spur of the moment. She really believes that, doesn't she?
"So…you don't have enough good karma to give me a big brudder?" Inuyasha asked.
"Well, it would be a little brother, because he would be younger than you. But no, I don't, sweetie."
Inuyasha collapsed in Touga's hold like crushed paper lantern. "But I want a big brudder…." His eyes welled with tears, and the sniffles that preluded a storm surge started.
In that instant, Touga made a decision. "But Inuyasha, you already have a big brother."
Just like that, the floodwaters receded. "I do?"
Touga nodded. "His name is Sesshoumaru."
"Se…Se…Se-sho-mu?"
"Se-sshou-ma-ru," Touga enunciated.
"W-Where is he?" Inuyasha asked, wiping his nose on his sleeve.
"Well, uh…I'm…not sure." Touga hated the truth in those words. He hadn't seen his firstborn since the day he'd almost died. Does Sesshoumaru even know I'm still alive?
Inuyasha turned around and stood up, bouncing on Touga's legs. "Daddy, let's go find him! I wanna meet my big brudder!"
"Maybe when you're older—"
"No, I wanna go now!" Inuyasha yelled.
"Inuyasha," Touga barked in a warning tone.
But Inuyasha would not be calmed. When Touga didn't give in, the little boy threw himself on the floor and rolled around in agony, crying and demanding to see his big brother. When Touga tried to wrestle him into submission, the boy wriggled like a fish, slapping, scratching, and biting him. Eventually though, he tired himself out and fell asleep.
"Dearest, maybe you should let them meet," Izayoi said as she stroked Inuyasha's scalp.
"We can't always give him what he wants, Izayoi," Touga answered. Inuyasha was her treasure, and Touga knew how much she liked to spoil the child. He tried to temper those tendencies of hers by taking a firmer stance with their son, though it was often harder than he anticipated. After all, he treasured their miracle child too.
"But they should meet. They're family."
Touga frowned. "Sesshoumaru won't see it that way."
Izayoi's hand fell on his arm, and he looked into her obsidian eyes, which glinted with a sternness he had once been surprised to discover in her. "You need to see Sesshoumaru too. It's been almost five years."
A mere minute to his long-lived kind, but an age to hers.
She squeezed him. "If not for yourself, do it for Sesshoumaru."
"For Sesshoumaru?" Touga echoed, puzzled.
Izayoi glanced away. "I know you said he told you some hurtful things to you the last time you spoke. But, if I had to guess…he was probably speaking from his own hurt."
"I'm not sure Sesshoumaru is capable of feeling hurt anymore," Touga retorted. Akuru's Rite had turned his son apathetic to much of life.
"I don't believe that," Izayoi argued.
"He's like his mother that way. They don't show any emotion."
Izayoi's face scrunched up. "I'm disappointed in you, Touga. I know you were unhappy with her, but you shouldn't malign Inukimi or your son that way. I don't care who you are—human or demon. You feel. Some people are just able to hide those feelings better than others."
Touga wanted to argue, You don't know them, but he knew it would be pointless. Izayoi had a stubborn streak about her, and when she set her mind to an idea, she didn't give it up. But he wanted to say, If Inukimi didn't have a heart of stone, I probably wouldn't be sitting here with you today, Izayoi.
It was a sobering thought and one he tried not to dwell on too much—precisely because it didn't matter. Inukimi had rejected him, and so here he was, with a loving wife and son.
"I would have to agree with Izayoi-sama," a buzzy voice said just as Touga's neck began to itch. He slapped it, and a flattened Myouga floated down into his palm as he pulled it away.
"Myouga, what are you doing here?" Touga asked.
Myouga popped back into shape. "Greetings, milord. I came to deliver updates from your army."
Although Touga had relinquished the reigns of command to his retainers on the front lines, he still liked to be kept appraised of their efforts and battles. While at times his blood burned for the thrill of a fight, that fire had been largely doused by his brush with death. As long as he had Izayoi and Inuyasha to look after, he would not go seeking war anymore.
"Never mind that, Myouga," Izayoi interjected, moving closer to look down at him. "You were saying you agree with me?"
Touga's lips twitched. It was rare for Izayoi to want to be proven right so badly.
"Indeed, my lady. Inukimi-sama may not appear to care, but she tends to keep her intentions—and even her actions—a secret."
Touga peered at the flea demon. "Are you saying you know about one of these secrets?"
Myouga hesitated. "I…well, I'm not sure I should say. …Then again, she only swore Riku-dono to secrecy and not me, so—"
"Riku?" Touga asked, an old, unwelcome feeling riling up his heart. "When did she see Riku?" If she was seeing Riku, that likely meant she was seeing Kirinmaru too. Despite all the centuries that passed, he still remembered the day Kirinmaru had attacked her. Though the beast king had backed off after that, Touga had still caught the way he sometimes looked at her on the rare occasions that the two did meet.
He hadn't liked it then, and even now, the idea sat uncomfortably in the pit of his stomach.
Why though? She is free to see whomever she wishes.
That didn't make the feeling go away though. Perhaps it's only natural. I was with her for seven centuries; it's an involuntary response. It is simply…strange to think of her with another male.
He tried to banish the thought that she probably found it just as strange for him to be with another female. It had only been a little over a decade, after all.
Myouga sighed. "It was the day Inuyasha-sama was born. When milord was charging into the manor to do battle, I confess that I—"
"Fled," Touga and Izayoi intoned at the same time.
Myouga cleared his throat. "Yes, well, be that as it may, I did come upon you later after Riku-dono saved you from the fire, Master. And as your loyal servant, I stayed by your side, in case any, erm…blood-letting services were required."
"I think I'd already lost plenty of blood that day," Touga remarked, trying not to smile.
"Yes indeed, I feasted quite well." His eyes bugged open at the look Touga gave him. "I-I mean, imagine my surprise when Inukimi-sama suddenly appeared in the clearing."
The room went silent as the couple stared at the flea. Touga's memory flashed back to one of his first thoughts upon waking: that he had smelled Inukimi's scent on him. He'd thought it had been a hallucination brought on by his near-death experience, but had that not been the case?
"Why was she there?" Izayoi asked in a quiet voice.
"She never said, milady. But she did tend to Inuyasha-sama and Touga-sama."
"To Inuyasha?" Touga and Izayoi echoed.
"Indeed. She helped him feed and then bade Riku-dono to wash him while she tended to your wounds, Master."
Touga shook her head. "Impossible. No matter how often I came home hurt, she never lifted a finger to treat me."
"Nevertheless, this time, she did," Myouga said.
Touga could barely comprehend it. Why? If she didn't care about me, then why did she come?
Izayoi put a hand against her heart, her stare going vacant for a moment, as if she were trying to figure out something. Then her eyes widened, and she glanced at her husband with a knowing look. He flushed. Of course she could feel how confused he was. "And she helped Inuyasha. You see? You thought you had her figured out, and she still surprised you. So mightn't Sesshoumaru also do the same?"
Touga sighed. He supposed he should give his son the benefit of the doubt. In fact, I would welcome such a surprise. "Fine. But it could take some time to find him. I really have no idea where he is."
"On that note, milord, I might be able to help you. Your scouts have been keeping an eye on other wars between nearby demon tribes to see if we might make allies. General Bikuni was recently campaigning against an army of imps on the Plains of Musashi."
Touga knew of Bikuni. He was a mid-rank demon, but he had amassed quite a following. What he lacked in strength he made up for in sheer numbers.
"Apparently, Sesshoumaru-sama entered the fray and killed General Bikuni singlehandedly—along with his entire army."
Sesshoumaru, siding with mere imps? That didn't sound like his son at all. Dare he hope something had changed in his son's heart over the last few years?
"It seems you have a heading," Izayoi said. "This trip should be an excellent source of father-son bonding time."
Touga cut her a look. "Oh, I see what's going on here. Pawn the child off on the father so the mother gets a long break."
Izayoi smiled and kissed his cheek. "Oh dear, you've discovered my secret plan," she answered in a playfully whisper. "But is that really such a bad thing?"
Touga pecked her lips. "No, my love. You deserve a chance to relax and more besides." He would never be able to make up for having left her alone to give birth and to suffer death at the hands of her one-time guard and friend. "Very well. We'll leave tomorrow."
He hoped he could mend his bond with Sesshoumaru, but if nothing else, at least he would get to spend some time one-on-one with Inuyasha.
Touga, Izayoi, and Inuyasha left behind the hubbub of Yoshino and walked into the rolling meadows beyond. Touga carried a bundle of necessities for Inuyasha, while Inuyasha had his wooden play sword strapped to his hip "in case he needed to fight any monsters" while they were away.
When they were finally out of sight of the town, Izayoi held Inuyasha back as Touga ran ahead and transformed, dwarfing nearby trees. Touga padded back over to them, every careful footfall nevertheless making the ground rumble.
Inuyasha gasped in delight, his eyes sparkling. "Daddy turned into a huge dog!" Touga lowered himself to the ground, and Izayoi brought Inuyasha forward so he could get acquainted with his father's new form. "Daddy, is that really you?" he asked.
Touga ruffed, and his breath blew Inuyasha's hair back. The boy giggled, and before Izayoi could stop him, he clambered up Touga's face, his little foot nearly poking his father in the eye as he scrambled onto Touga's snout. "Daddy, you're so big! Mommy, Mommy, can I turn into a dog too?"
"No, sweetie. Only dog demons can do that."
"Aww," Inuyasha groaned. As young as he was, he was starting to understand more and more what limitations he had concerning his demonic heritage. The day he had seen Touga fly, he had tried so hard to mimic him, eventually climbing into a tree to take off like a bird. He had learned the hard way that he didn't have such an ability—but not before scaring Izayoi half to death when he fell from the canopy.
"Go sit up on Daddy's head," Izayoi called out. Inuyasha obeyed. "Make sure you hold on tight!" She looked down into Touga's giant red eye, then leaned in and kissed the fur beneath it. "Both of you be safe. Make sure he doesn't fall."
Touga grunted in agreement and then stood up. Inuyasha cried out in glee.
"Bye, Mommy!" He waved, and his mother waved back. Finally, Touga leapt into the sky.
He spent the next three days tracking down his eldest son. First, he flew east towards the Plains of Musashi, hoping to catch hold of Sesshoumaru's scent. But the journey took longer than it would have if he were on his own, simply because Inuyasha needed care—or he grew bored.
"Have you found him yet?" Inuyasha asked over and over. Touga couldn't answer in words, only barks—but Inuyasha seemed to have a vague understanding of what he said anyway. They took frequent breaks so they could hunt or fish for Inuyasha's meals. Sometimes the boy napped on Touga's head as they flew, but other times, Inuyasha would hit him repeatedly with his toy sword, giving Touga enough of a headache that he would alight so Inuyasha could run around and burn off some excess energy.
They reached the edge of the plains that night, where they camped out under the stars so Inuyasha could have a proper rest curled up in Touga's fur cape. The next day, Touga scoured the plains for signs of battle and quickly came upon the scars it left behind—along with the bodies (or pieces) or hundreds of demons. A group of demon slayers roved over the field, hauling bones and bodies into carts. Touga stayed away from them, not wanting to risk Inuyasha's safety, skirting the field to see if he could pick up Sesshoumaru's scent. Eventually he found it, but when he followed it back a ways, he noticed the scent growing staler. So he had to turn around and head back towards the battlefield.
From what he could tell, Sesshoumaru had walked right through the center of it. He flew around the carnage once more until he picked up the trail on the other side and then resumed his search.
The next afternoon, after they took a break so Inuyasha could relieve himself, the boy refused to get back on Touga's head.
"No, I don't wanna fly anymore. I'm bored," he groaned with a puffy-faced pout. "Play with me, Daddy."
In an effort to get Inuyasha to comply, Touga grunted and booped his nose against Inuyasha, sending him stumbling back. But Inuyasha just laughed and pulled out his wooden sword. "Back, back dog demon!" He started smacking Touga's snout with it.
Touga couldn't help the twitch of his lips as the sword banged uselessly against him. Still, it riled up a sense of play in him, and he brought his paws forward, enclosing Inuyasha within their perimeter. He lay his snout at the opening between his paws and then stuck out his tongue, edging closer.
"Nooo!" Inuyasha cried out, backing up into his paws. "Daddy, stop! I don't wanna get wet!" He turned around and tried to scramble up Touga's giant claws, but then Touga pushed forward and licked him from top to bottom, making him fall to the ground. "Baaahh! Daddy, nooo!" Inuyasha whined, which turned into laughter as Touga kept licking him. "S-Stop, dat's so gross, Daddy!"
Just then, footsteps crunched through the grass, and Touga sat up, fully alert. But his ears fell back down as he beheld his eldest son standing on the edge of the clearing. He hadn't smelled him coming—Sesshoumaru must have been downwind from them.
Inuyasha grunted as he climbed up and over Touga's wall of paws. "What is it, Daddy?" Inuyasha sniffed then, frowning, and turned towards Sesshoumaru. "Who's dat? He kinda smells like you, Daddy."
Sesshoumaru huffed. "What a quaint picture you paint, Father. I didn't know you could be so playful."
"Fadder?" Inuyasha echoed. Suddenly, his eyes widened in realization, and a huge smile lit his face. "Are you Shoumaru?" he asked, jumping down from Touga's leg and running towards the demon.
Touga transformed in the blink of an eye. "Inuyasha, wait—!"
Inuyasha stopped in front of Sesshoumaru. "Are you my big brudder?"
Sesshoumaru's brows creased in annoyance.
Inuyasha must not have noticed, because he pulled out his wooden sword and held it up. "Do you wanna play swords wif me? Daddy's playing da monster demon. We can fight him togedder." Then Inuyasha looked on each side of Sesshoumaru and frowned. "Do you not have a sword?"
"I do not need one," Sesshoumaru answered, flexing his claws.
"Yes you do! Odderwise, it's not fair. I know! If you ask Daddy, I bet you can borrow one of his. He's got fwee," Inuyasha said, eyes aglitter with pride as he held up three pudgy fingers.
Sesshoumaru cut a glare at Touga. "Somehow I doubt that. I've asked for them before, yet he denied me."
"Last I checked, I was still breathing; therefore, my swords still belong to me, and I have need of them," Touga remarked, coming forward.
"I did not think you would survive," Sesshoumaru answered.
Touga's demeanor relaxed. "In truth? Neither did I. It was only thanks to Kirinmaru and Riku that I still stand here today. I owe him a life debt."
Sesshoumaru stared at him in silence a few seconds long enough to make the pause just shy of awkward. Finally, he said, "Just do not relinquish Tessaiga or Sou'unga to him."
"What I do with my swords is my own business. Besides, if you want one so much, you are more than capable of forging a sword from your own body, son," Touga responded. "But is this really what you want to talk about after all these years?"
"What else is there to say?" Sesshoumaru asked.
Touga gestured to Inuyasha, who continued to stare at Sesshoumaru in great interest. "Inuyasha wanted to meet his older brother. You should say hello."
"And why should I cave in to the whims of a child?" Sesshoumaru answered.
Touga gritted his teeth. "Because he's family."
"He's your family, not mi—"
Suddenly, Sesshoumaru stiffened, and too late, Touga realized that both of them had taken their eyes off Inuyasha while they were talking. The little boy had picked up the end of Sesshoumaru's fur and hugged it. "Shoumaru, you've got a fluffy-fluff like Daddy!" he cried out, nuzzling his face into it.
Sesshoumaru's nose crinkled, and with a flick of his fur tail, he threw Inuyasha off. The child flew through the air before landing on his back with a thud.
"Inuyasha!" Touga cried out, running to his youngest. The boy started wailing, and Touga pulled him into his arms to soothe him.
Sesshoumaru's face twisted in disgust. "You coddle him."
"Sesshoumaru, what on earth is wrong with you?" his father snapped. "You can't treat a child that way. And by the gods, he's your little brother—he meant no harm!"
"I will not tolerate a filthy half-breed sullying my person."
"Sesshoumaru!" Touga bellowed over Inuyasha's cries.
The crash of brush caused Touga to jerk his head around in alarm, though Sesshoumaru didn't move. A moment later, a small, green imp plowed through, gasping for breath.
"A-Ah, S-Sesshoumaru-sama, I finally…I finally found you!" he wheezed. "Y-You're…so fast, mi-milord." The imp appeared ready to pass out.
"Who's this?" Touga asked as Inuyasha calmed down, distracted by the green newcomer. He rarely saw such animal-like demons.
"Are you still following me?" Sesshoumaru asked.
"Milord, as you have…saved my life…I, Jaken…will follow you…to the ends of the earth to serve you!" the imp gasped, puffing out his chest and slapping it.
Touga glanced at his son in surprise. "You saved this creature's life?"
"He did indeed, milord! Why, with one swipe of his magnificent claws, he destroyed the demon Bikuni, who was plaguing my clan!"
"He was in my way," Sesshoumaru answered.
Touga sighed. I should have known not to get my hopes up. He is no more compassionate than the day he returned home from his Rite. Still…perhaps this is progress, in its own small way. "Well done, Sesshoumaru. You will need loyal retainers to help you govern the Western Province."
Sesshoumaru huffed. "Mother seems to have that handled well enough on her own. I have no interest in court affairs."
Touga's heart jerked. "…And how is your mother?"
"How should I know? I have not seen her in years."
Touga frowned. "You left her alone?"
Sesshoumaru slid a dark look at Touga out of the corners of his eyes. "I am not the one who pledged to stay by her side for eternity. I can go where I please. You are the one who left her alone, Father."
"F-Father?" Jaken muttered, his bulbous, yellow eyes widening as he glanced between the two dog demons.
"If you are so concerned about her wellbeing, why don't you go and ask her yourself?" Sesshoumaru suggested, walking past Touga and heading for the other side of the clearing.
"That's it?" Touga asked, turning around. "You have nothing else to say?" He knew he couldn't expect much, but he had at least hoped for some sort of sentiment—even just to know that Sesshoumaru was happy to see him alive and well again.
Sesshoumaru stopped and looked over his shoulder. "I do not. For some reason, you think otherwise. What is it that you want me to say?"
"We haven't spoken much since…since I mated Izayoi," Touga replied. "I just want to know how you are. How you…feel about that." About me.
Sesshoumaru blinked languidly. "What does it matter how I feel about it? You chose her regardless. You were always going to choose her."
Touga frowned. "What do you mean by that?"
Sesshoumaru ignored him, continuing. "I do not understand your choice, Father, nor do I agree with it, but I have long accepted it. I had to in order to come home."
"I don't understand."
"You wanted to know what I did during my Rite. Now you do." Sesshoumaru began walking away once more.
Touga was still trying to fit the pieces of that particular puzzle together, but one thing Sesshoumaru had said stood out, and if Touga didn't act on it now, he didn't know when he would. So he set aside his confusion and ran forward, calling out, "Wait, Sesshoumaru! If you really have accepted it, then that means you've accepted Inuyasha, haven't you?" Touga overtook him and turned Inuyasha around so the brothers could see each other face-to-face. "At least say something to him before you go. Maybe…give him some brotherly advice."
Sesshoumaru stopped, and Inuyasha stared at him with hesitant expectation.
But Sesshoumaru just closed his eyes and huffed without even looking at him. "Why should I spare any words on a half-breed—especially one so weak, he cannot stand back up after he falls?"
"I-I can to!" Inuyasha exclaimed, glaring at his brother. He rubbed the leftover tears out of his eyes. "I just…I was just surprised is all."
Sesshoumaru finally glanced at him. "That was your own fault. You trusted that I would not hurt you simply because we share some demonic blood. It would behoove you not to make that mistake again."
"Sesshoumaru," Touga hissed. That was not the type of advice he'd had in mind.
Inuyasha pulled out his wooden sword and brandished it at Sesshoumaru. "You're mean. Next time, I'm gonna fight you, Shoumaru."
For the first time, Sesshoumaru smirked. "Very well. Fight me if you can…little brother." With that, he strode into the forest. Jaken scrambled after him with a shrill, "Wait for me, milord!"
Touga stood with Inuyasha for several minutes, watching the spot where his son had left, his heart troubled. One the one hand, he was glad to have seen Sesshoumaru again. And amazingly, the meeting could have gone much, much worse. But still, he had hoped for better.
"Daddy?" Inuyasha piped up.
"What is it, son?"
"…I don't fink I need a big brudder anymore. I can play by myself."
Touga's heart tore, and he hugged Inuyasha. "Don't say that, son. Daddy will play with you. And Sesshoumaru…Sesshoumaru will come around when you're older. Did you see him smile just now? He likes to have sword fights, just like you. You're just a little too young to play with him right now, but when you're older, he'll want to play swords with you too."
Of course, Sesshoumaru would have the advantage, and if Touga know his son, he wouldn't hold back against his brother.
No matter what Izayoi says, I'm going to have to start teaching Inuyasha to fight now, if only to defend himself. Sesshoumaru was not the only threat—other demons and humans would persecute him too just because he was a half-demon.
Until Sesshoumaru can put aside his disdain for humans, he will never fully accept Inuyasha. But at least if Inuyasha can become strong enough, Sesshoumaru might at least recognize him.
As he and Inuyasha flew home, Touga replayed his conversation with Sesshoumaru over and over, looking for any hidden meanings. He puzzled over the mention of Sesshoumaru's Rite in particular.
Did Sesshoumaru know I would meet Izayoi? That actually might explain why his attitude towards me changed so much when he came back. The realization bothered him the more he thought about it. If Sesshoumaru had said something, so much hurt could have been avoided.
But if he'd said something, I wouldn't have Izayoi or Inuyasha. And I can't imagine my life without them now.
His thoughts invariably turned towards Inukimi then. It pained him to know she was living alone once more. He knew they needed to speak again, just the two of them. There had been too much left unsaid when they last saw each other. But his heart was too heavy now to even contemplate facing his demon wife again.
He would need time for all the hurts to heal before volunteering to rip them open again.
Muromachi Period, Ouei Era 1st Year (1394 CE)
Inukimi watched with some surprise and great interest as her errant husband clanked up the steps in full armor, as if he had come to face off against an enemy general and not his wife. How many years had it been since he left her now? Fifty?
Human lives are so short. I hardly had to wait at all. She bit back a smile as she tapped a manicured claw against her cheek while she lounged. But if he thinks he can just crawl back into my arms and my bed, he has a lot yet to learn.
"Kimi," Touga said by way of greeting when he reached the top.
Trying to butter me up with that pet name? That won't work. And yet hearing him say it again made her heart flutter nonetheless.
"So you've finally decided to show your face here once more, have you? That woman must be dead then."
Touga's eyes widened in surprise. After a moment, he parsed out, "On the contrary…she is alive and well."
Inukimi did not let her tapping finger miss a beat. So I must wait a few years more. No matter. "Is that so? Humans age quite terribly though. She must be in pain."
Touga cocked his head to the side, peering at her in suspicion. "If your words truly stem from pity, you will be glad to know Izayoi hasn't aged a single day since I marked her."
Inukimi's heart thudded, dread mounting within her, but she kept her expression placid. "How curious."
"Indeed. It can only be the power of our mating bond. It is supposed to tie demons' life energies together, is it not? So I've come to believe it's tied her life to mine, though I know for a fact that mine is not tied to hers."
Inukimi gritted her teeth. "I see."
Now what? If that woman never perishes, Touga will never come back home.
Inukimi could kill her, of course—nothing about the mating bond would stop an unnatural death. Indeed, from what she surmised years ago and Touga's words just now, Izayoi had died once before and been brought back. But there would be no second chance for her: Tenseiga could only resurrect a person once.
She had considered the whim a multitude of times over the decades, but she always refrained, because one, short-lived moment of satisfaction would destroy the lifetime of happiness she sought, since Touga would never forgive her.
That, and apparently Sesshoumaru had tried that route before during his Rite and it bore no fruit.
"So what is it that you have to say? Surely you did not come all this way just to update me on the wellbeing of your human."
Touga's brow twitched in irritation. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Then as you wish, I will speak plainly. Inukimi, I think it's time now that we make our separation public…and divorce."
Inukimi's eyes widened, and her finger stopped tapping as she sat up straight. "Divorce?"
Touga stepped closer to her, but when Inukimi's claws dug into the armrest and cushion of her throne, he stopped. "I know it is uncommon among out kind—"
"It is unheard of." Demons who wanted to be rid of their partners simply killed them. Her love-riddled heart could not bear to dispense with Touga so. But then, did that mean he still bore some affection for her too?
That meant there was still hope.
"—However," he inserted, taking back control of the conversation, "in light of the circumstances, I think it only fair—to all of us."
"Fair?" Inukimi echoed. "How is leaving me to run off into the sunset with your human tart fair, Touga?"
His eyes flashed red, and he growled. "Kimi, enough. It's been fifty years now. I understand I did wrong by you, and I'm heartily sorry for it. But did you ever stop to think about why I fell in love with Izayoi in the first place?"
Inukimi's face pinched. Of course she had. Some days, it was all she thought about, though she would never admit it. Instead, she raised her head and looked down her nose at him. "I assume it's because I didn't mate you when you asked. Had I, this wouldn't have happened. An error on my part."
"That's only the surface of the problem, Kimi. The reason is why you didn't mate me. You didn't trust me. You didn't love me. I've finally come to accept that."
Each statement was a dagger through her heart. She couldn't deny that there had been some truth to that in the beginning, but had her years of loyalty to him meant nothing? She had broken so far out of her comfort zone just for him! Did he not realize that?
Touga continued, "Now you need to accept this new state of affairs and stop punishing the both of us with the ties of a broken marriage."
She chuckled to hide the pain building in her chest like water filling a dam. "You think this is a punishment for me as well?"
Touga's brows wavered in doubt. "Isn't it? You could free yourself and find another with whom to share your life. But you remain shackled to me—and for what? Revenge?"
Her nose curled. "Hardly. I am well aware that revenge is an unsatisfying end."
"Then why, Kimi?"
Because I love you, you idiot. And I am the bigger fool for it. "Because I am your wife, and I promised to stay loyal to you for eternity."
"As did I, but…I have broken that vow. So you are free to break yours—you do not need my blessing to release you from it."
"Unlike you, I take my vows seriously. I will remain with you until the end."
"But you're not with me, so what's the point?" Touga snapped. "You banished us, after all."
"And you left without fighting back. The Touga I once knew wouldn't have caved so easily. He would have asserted his dominance over me."
Touga stared at her in shock. "Are you saying if had I fought you and won, you would have allowed Izayoi to live in the palace?"
"Well, we'll never know now, will we?"
"And must I fight you now to obtain this divorce? Or will you see reason without resorting to extremes?"
Despite the harshness of his words, his heart didn't seem to be in them. Rather, he sounded tired, as if fighting her was the last thing he wanted to do, though he had relished it so much in the past.
Extremes? Since when did fighting become an extreme to him?
"You don't want to fight me," Inukimi stated.
He shook his head. "I don't."
She huffed, another piece of her heart breaking. He had not been the only one to enjoy their duels. "You've changed, Touga. There was a time when you would take any battle thrown at you."
Touga nodded. "Yes. And I admit you warned me about the perils of doing so many times, though I was too arrogant to listen. It wasn't until I was on death's door with the knowledge that I would never see my son grow up that I realized how foolish I had been all these years, chasing power with no heed as to the cost. I am trying to teach Inuyasha that, though I confess I may be failing."
"Hmph, a half-breed lusting for more power. What a novel concept," Inukimi retorted, coating her tongue in a thick layer of sarcasm.
Her words hit their mark, for Touga's jaw tightened in irritation. A second later though, a smug smirk slipped onto his lips. "Have you heard that Ryuukotsusei perished?"
Inukimi frowned at the odd segue. "I had. I assumed it was your doing."
Touga shook his head, his smile growing into that of a proud parent's. "It was Inuyasha, actually. It's true, that boy is always itching for a fight to prove himself. Looking back, I probably shouldn't have told him so many stories of my Rite and war campaigns as he grew up. Izayoi was always adamant that Inuyasha should not be tested with a Rite…but he wanted one regardless."
"So you sent him to take care of the foe you couldn't? I recall you saying you would not resort to what your own father had done. …Then again, I suppose one that's already half-dead is more in line with a half-breed's abilities."
"You misunderstand. I stood by Izayoi's decision. But Inuyasha left on his own. The fool boy took my sword one day and ran. By the time I tracked him down, it was too late: he had woken Ryuukotsusei and engaged him in battle. At that point, it truly was a Rite of Courage and Cowardice, so I could not in good conscience intervene. Still, he managed to slay him. With that, he proved he can stand against the best of them now."
Now it made sense why Touga had suddenly decided to go public with their separation. The half-breed is capable of defending himself now, meaning there are two of them to protect that human woman. Touga does not fear for their safety anymore.
"Your pride belies your words, Touga. You say you regret chasing power, and yet that is the only reason you and your children have survived."
"Power wielded for the sake of others is different from power amassed for oneself," Touga rebuked. "I think, on an instinctive level, Inuyasha understands that, though he may deny it to your face. However, I hope to make certain it is not too late for Sesshoumaru. …In fact, I would like to see him before I leave."
"Then you'll have to go find him. He doesn't live here anymore," Inukimi answered.
Touga's expression grew downcast. "I see. I assumed as much, though I hoped that would not be the case." He took a deep breath and then looked at Inukimi again. "Despite everything, I hate to see you here alone, Kimi."
Her brows puckered. "You see me here as you first found me. What I have lived through once I can live through again."
"But I would see you happy. Let us dissolve this marriage, so you can go and find someone who will help you find joy."
He speaks as if it were so easy—as if it did not take decades to find even him! "I decide my own happiness. And I am content to remain as I am: your wife."
"Kimi—"
"Enough," she said, standing up. "I have made my position clear: you will get no divorce from me."
Touga frowned. "Whatever vestige of marriage you want, Kimi, I cannot give it to you. I am mated. What you are doing is cruel—to both of us."
"No one ever accused me of being kind or merciful. Those were descriptors for my husband. And look how weak they made you." She walked past him and down the steps, leaping into the air as she transformed. She didn't dare look back at him, and as she suspected, he didn't come after her to enforce his will.
Maybe she was being cruel, but she didn't care. She was a demon. She was selfish. So she would keep him tethered to her for eternity, because at least then, she knew he would keep having to come back to her.
But that didn't erase the pain of hearing him ask her over and over for a divorce.
He wants to be rid of me. Whatever feelings for me that remain in his heart aren't enough. And it's all the damn woman's fault. She wormed her way in and took up the space that I once occupied.
As Inukimi passed over a human town, the residents' idle chatter and laughter lifted to her on the wind. Rage coursed through her then, provoked by their carefree gaiety.
Humans. A thorn in her side now, and a veritable thicket of thorns to come, according to her visions from Akuru. With wrath seething in her blood, she roared and crashed down on the town, turning the mortals' laughter into screams. She toppled huts, batted bodies away and sprayed her poison over what remained. But still it wasn't enough.
So she tore her way from town to town, leaving a trail of destruction in her wake.
Meiji Era 7th year (1875 CE)
Inukimi's body straightened as she sensed two energies approaching that she had not felt in a long time—one centuries longer than the other.
They're back—together, she realized, fighting the smile that threatened to slip onto her face. Even so, her gait hastened ever so slightly as she made her way to her throne. She had an image to maintain, after all.
She treasured Sesshoumaru's rare visits. Her son had grown into an exceptional demon, and she doted on him in ways that only a demon mother could. At this age, he should have not only learned about how to run the Western Province but taken over many of those duties as well. But neither did she wish to trap him when he had such obvious wanderlust nor smother him with her attention or desires for him to come home more often. It was for that reason that she had also let slide the fact that he had not yet gotten married. He was an adult, and he had to find his place in the world before he took on his parents' mantle.
But what most surprised her about this visit was the other aura alongside Sesshoumaru.
Inukimi smirked as she took her seat and casually rested her head against her hand. Her patience had finally won out.
I knew you would come crawling back one day, Touga.
Father and son alit on the stairs and walked up together. Touga's straight-backed stance was a far cry from the tired, hunched figure he had presented to her that last two times he had come some five hundred years prior. While Touga stopped at the top of the stairs to keep his distance, Sesshoumaru walked over to stand at his mother's side like a sentinel.
Oh, what's this? Is my son showing solidarity with me? What could this mean?
Even after Touga's near brush with death—and Sesshoumaru's minor but critical role in saving him—their son had maintained a frosty relationship with his father. He occasionally saw Touga and would report his doings to her, like a good son, but those visits were few and far between. And she had no interest in finding out for herself what that human and her son were up to—although Inuyasha's exploits had become quite the talk of the demon world in recent years, so she had learned of them inadvertently.
"Well, this is a surprise," Inukimi drawled, holding Touga's gaze. "Father and son home again, just like old times. What brings you here, Touga?"
She refused to call him husband. They might still be married in name, but only the two of them knew that. Even Sesshoumaru was not aware. The demon world was convinced they had long since divorced. After his last visit, Touga had gone out of his way to affirm the badly kept secret that he had mated a human; sired a child on her; and left his demon wife, court life, and wars.
Touga shifted his stance, looking over the two of them. "I have a proposal for you."
Inukimi's hand tightened imperceptibly in her lap. Once, she had sat here listening to another proposal from him. But he had been so arrogant, passionate, and charming then. Well, she supposed he was still arrogant—and charming, despite everything—but the passion that had once fueled him was gone. When he stepped away from his armies after his other son was born, Inukimi couldn't help but think, I asked you to stop when Sesshoumaru was a babe, and you refused. Why is that child any different?
"Concerning what?" she asked.
Touga took a deep breath. "I'd like for you and Sesshoumaru to come live together with me, Izayoi, and Inuyasha."
"What?" Sesshoumaru snapped, his voice as venomous as his blood. "Why would we deign to live with them?"
"Son, listen. I know you've been roaming the country. Surely you've seen the changes taking over Japan these last few years. Now that the humans have allowed Westerners to come, the transformation is…alarming."
Inukimi's attention perked up. It can't be. Is it time already? "What changes?"
"The time of the shogunate is done, for one. There has been a move towards democracy—equality of voice among the classes."
Inukimi's nose curled. Equality among the classes? Ridiculous.
And yet…visions sparked in her memory. Her Rite had taken place so many eons ago, some memories were fainter than others. They had been so ridiculous to even consider….
But there were some seared so deeply that she would never forget them.
"And that's hardly the half of it. Perhaps you've noticed the advances in industry? Humans are scarring the earth with railroads, and their trains belch noxious smoke. They're travelling faster and developing more technologies than ever before."
"And what does this matter to me? They are still earthbound, and I am here, content to rule from the sky," Inukimi answered.
"They are making their way into the skies as well," Touga replied. "The Westerners brought over their 'hot air balloons'—like giant, floating lanterns that carry them towards the clouds. They don't travel very far or fast, but they are bringing humans higher than they've ever been before."
"So?" Inukimi continued. "I am still more powerful than they. And as soon as we tear through these 'balloons,' they will fall right back to the ground."
Touga's brows furrowed. "If you think that will keep them down for long, you underestimate human ingenuity, Inukimi. Right now it's balloons. Someday, they may find a way to fly on their own merits up here. And they could bring weapons. Have you seen what today's firearms can do?"
At that, Inukimi sat up. Another memory flashed through her mind—strange, metal contraptions whizzing through the air with the buzz of a million insects. Bursts of fiery light from them. Small cannisters falling from their underbellies and lighting whole tracts of land on fire.
Two entire cities going up in mushroom clouds of smoke. Wiped off the face of the earth.
"With the new government in Edo—er, Tokyo, rather—centralizing everything, the demon slayers have been organizing," Touga continued. "They're banding together from all over the country. The government is funding their research into better demon-slaying weapons."
He's so knowledgeable about this. Is it the result of living with a human woman? Do they live among her kind?
Inukimi peered at her husband in thought. "Touga…are you afraid of them?"
"…I am beginning to be, yes."
Inukimi's eyes widened. Who is this man? He certainly wasn't the one she married. The Touga she remembered was fearless. Fearless and reckless. He wouldn't care how strong his enemy was. He would fight regardless.
He changed after he met that woman. Ah, of course. So that's the reason. "I see. You fear for the safety of that woman and her son. She may be human, but she consorts with a demon and mothered a half-breed. Human prejudices are strong." Not that demons' were any weaker.
Touga frowned. "Not just their safety, Kimi. Yours and Sesshoumaru's too."
Kimi? Her heart glowed like a reawakened ember as the old nickname sparked it.
Sesshoumaru scoffed. "I do not fear humans, Father—no matter what new weapons they acquire. They will always be lesser beings."
"Son, don't underestimate them! I've lived with humans long enough now to understand that just because they cannot physically do something doesn't mean they won't find a way. What should be impossible for them they make possible by studying their environment and adapting to it.
"Kirinmaru has toured the world many a time. He has oft regaled me with stories about other nations and cultures—particularly those in the West that had comparable societies to the Japanese and even the mainlanders. But his stories in recent years have become downright frightening. Japan has fallen behind. What we never dreamed of here, other nations have already done. And now this country is trying to catch up. And it's doing so fast.
"The human world is growing more and more connected. No longer are they satisfied with being isolated from each other in their own lands and enclaves. They've been dominating each other left and right and subjugating those of their own kind who lack superior technology."
"Isn't that all the better for us? Let them fight amongst themselves: we will come out the victors in the end," Sesshoumaru argued.
"You should know as well as I do that the one thing that will unite two adversaries is a common enemy. We are that enemy, Sesshoumaru. …I've been a military strategist long enough to see the signs. Right now, they're building up their strength. Only a fool would underestimate an opponent growing this quickly. I want to stay one step ahead of them."
"You want to be ready when they come for demonkind," Inukimi answered.
"Yes. But I don't want them to know we're even there."
Inukimi's mouth tightened. She knew where this was going.
"What do you mean?" Sesshoumaru asked.
Touga looked his son straight in the eye. "Son…I want us to masquerade as humans."
"Ridiculous," Sesshoumaru spat.
"I know this rankles your pride, but—"
"Out of the question," Sesshoumaru continued. "I will not lower myself to their level."
"You will if you want to live!" Touga snapped. "My pride almost cost me my life once. I too thought that a human could not best me. But if we are weakened enough, they can kill us. And you can be sure they are looking for ways to diminish our power. I won't see you or your mother die because of your pride. Not if I can help it," Touga finished.
Inukimi blinked slowly at him, trying not to give away how her heart soared when she heard those words.
He still cares. Somewhere deep in his heart, he still cares about me. Otherwise, why try to save her when it would be best for him if she did die? Then he would be free of his marriage to me.
She didn't quite understand Touga's feelings for her in light of his human mate, but she knew this much: she would be a fool to waste this chance.
"Your concern is noted, Father," Sesshoumaru continued, "but Mother and I can take care of our—"
"Very well. I accept your proposal, Touga," Inukimi interjected. Sesshoumaru's head whipped down to her in shock.
Even Touga appeared thrown for a loop. "Ah…you will?"
"You are correct. Humans have been growing brazen lately. I hear more and more reports of demonic killings. It is best we plan ahead, and if that means living together as…humans…so be it."
"Mother—"
"I have made my decision, Sesshoumaru. You, of course, are free to decline. But I will not change my mind."
Sesshoumaru's jaw tightened. He held her gaze, as if trying to figure out what was going through her mind. She didn't blame him. Giving in so easily like this was not her style.
"Fine," he spat. "I will come. But only to make sure you are not mistreated," he added, glaring at his father.
Touga had the grace to look wounded. "Son, I would never—"
"Inuyasha's insolence knows no bounds. I will make sure he knows his place. And no doubt his mother is as happy with this proposal as we are."
Touga frowned. "On the contrary, Izayoi agrees with me. She—"
"Enough," Inukimi said, throwing up a hand. She didn't want to hear about the human woman's soft and loving heart. It was going to be wretched enough to watch her with Touga. She didn't need to being the torture now. "It is decided. Let us not waste time arguing when we have a myriad of logistics to plan."
Touga sighed, a small smile finally appearing on his lips. "And that's your strength, Kimi. I'm glad to have you with us."
Yes, there were many plans to go over: where they would live, how they would integrate and disguise themselves, and how she would dismantle her family palace.
But as they discussed their future, in the back of her mind, there was yet one other plan she concocted.
I have waited centuries for you to come back to me, Touga. Now I will make you mine once again.
AN: And so we've finally reached the end of Part One! Next chapter, we move back to the present, which I know many of you have been waiting for~
Now for the bad news: I need to take a short break. Not only do I have a work trip coming up and some life things to take care of, but I also ran out of buffer chapters…. No worries though! The next few are already basically written; I just need to clean them up and add a few scenes. I hope to be back in a few weeks. Stay tuned to my social media for updates.
On that note, if you haven't read/reread My Sanctuary and you were thinking about it…now would be the time, because next chapter and beyond is all spoilers. See you soon!