So...hi.
I'm so, so sorry this chapter has taken as long as it has to come out. A year ago when I started writing it, a lot of things changed for me all at the same time (as they probably have for almost everybody since the beginning of 2020) and I lost what little time I had to write along with motivation for this chapter as I kept envisioning the perfect thing that I just couldn't reach.
This is finally it though, and as much as I want to keep trying to tweak and perfect it even further, I just have to let it go and move on to the next chapter.
Good news, my circumstances have once again changed in life. So now I have more time than before to write and that's what I've been doing. At this point, I'm hoping to update this story every week or every other week at the very least.
I hope you decide to stick around to see what happens as we go from here, and I really hop you enjoy this.
So yeah. Thank you all so much.
A Family Affair
Chapter Ten
When Sasuke woke up in the morning, he didn't know it was going to be a bad day.
Later on, he'd think back about it and wonder if the fact that he'd woken up alone had been some strange type of cosmic foreshadowing, but at the time all he did was sit up in bed and rub the sleep out of his eyes as he looked around for his brother. A little confused that he wasn't there when the clock only read 8:07 AM.
"Itachi?" he called out.
He waited for a response but when none came, he slid out of bed and grabbed a pair of Itachi's sweatpants and a shirt to throw on just because he could. Then he headed out toward the living room, calling his brother's name again.
Still, there was no response.
When he stopped at the end of the hallway, he put his hands on his hips and frowned. Both the living room and kitchen were empty. He turned around and went back a few steps, checking Itachi's office and knocking on the bathroom door just to cover all his bases, but Itachi wasn't there either.
"Huh… Weird," he mumbled to himself as he shook his head. But he was still determined to find his brother, so he made his way back to the living room and grabbed his phone from where he'd left it on the coffee table last night.
The battery was low but not dead, so he dialed his brother's number. Thankfully, Itachi picked up on the second ring.
"Hey! You're up early."
"Yeah, I just got up," Sasuke said. "Where are you?"
"At home," Itachi replied, making Sasuke's brow furrow.
He looked around him again, even going so far as to lift up one of the decorative little pillows on the couch. Like he was expecting his brother to magically appear from underneath it, but he still didn't see Itachi anywhere.
"Really? Are you in an alternate dimension or something? Because I don't see you."
"No," Itachi said with a laugh. "I just got back."
Like he was making his point, Sasuke heard a car door shut outside so he walked over to the front door and opened it. Sure enough, Itachi was outside with his phone to his ear, standing in front of the open trunk of his car. As soon as he saw Sasuke he gave him a little wave before pulling his phone away and ending the call so he could grab a couple of bags out the trunk.
"Thanks for saving me the trouble of opening that," Itachi called, nodding toward the front door when he started up the path to the house.
"No problem, do you need… What?" Sasuke asked, interrupting himself when Itachi stopped a few steps from the door to stare at him. "What is it?"
"Nothing," Itachi said, shaking his head a little as he smiled. "I just didn't realize how much I'd like seeing you in my clothes."
A self-conscious heat immediately started rising in his chest and Sasuke ducked his head down and rubbed the palms of his hands against the stolen sweatpants, which just made his brother laugh.
"It's nothing to be embarrassed about," Itachi assured him as he continued inside. As he passed by Sasuke, he dropped a brief kiss on his cheek and added, "I promise, I like it."
The words made a fluttery sensation burst to life in his chest and Sasuke smiled to himself as he watched his brother toe off his shoes and head to the kitchen to put the bags he'd brought in down. Once he had, Itachi turned around and leaned back against the counter, regarding Sasuke with an easy smile.
"What're you doing up so early, anyway?"
"I dunno; I just kinda woke up, really," Sasuke said, giving a little half shrug.
He walked over and peaked around Itachi to glance at the bags with a curious look, though he couldn't see anything inside from where he was standing.
"Where did you disappear to, though?"
"Oh, just to the store to pick up a few things. I was only gone for…" Itachi glanced over to look at the clock on the stove. "Twenty minutes or so. It's so early that I didn't think you'd wake up for a while yet and I wanted to go and get a few things for today."
Sasuke gave his brother a sidelong look and hummed suspiciously.
"What's today?"
Itachi shrugged nonchalantly.
"Well, since I assume you're still insisting on leaving tonight because you "have a friend" and, I don't know, like "want to see them" or something like that," Itachi said, air-quotes and all, making Sasuke huff out a laugh as his brother acted like both concepts were foreign to him. "I just figured that I would do something a little special."
"Oh, really? And what did you come up with? No—wait!" Sasuke said quickly, holding up his hands so Itachi wouldn't try to tell him. "Let me guess!"
He thought about it for as long as it took him to take a breath before he snapped his fingers.
"I know! You figured you'd make me jealous by having a party and inviting your friends."
"See, now I did think that at first," Itachi shot back, pointing a finger in his direction as he agreed. "But…then I remembered that, you know, I don't actually have any friends, so…"
Sasuke clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth and nodded like Itachi made a good point.
"Yeah, I guess that would make it difficult."
"Exactly," Itachi said with a sarcastic grin. "So, I had to come up with another plan since I'd already checked out at the store and everything."
"Oh?"
This time, Sasuke lifted himself up on his tiptoes a little bit as he looked around his brother again and tried to see what was in the bags. But Itachi purposefully shifted to stop him from seeing anything, and Sasuke lowered himself back down with a frown.
"What's your new plan then?"
"Well…" Itachi lifted his hand up and brushed his fingers against Sasuke's cheek. "I thought I'd take you out."
His eyes widened a little bit in surprise. But not in a bad way.
"Like on a date?" he asked.
Then, after thinking about it for a second, he added, "Or like…?" and let his tongue hang out of his mouth as he drew his thumb across his throat.
Itachi laughed loudly and playfully pushed him away.
"A date, of course, you weirdo!" Itachi answered with a shake of his head. "Or as much of one as I can offer you around here anyway."
"Well, that definitely sounds nicer than the alternative, so I'd love to," Sasuke noted with a smile that made his brother roll his eyes. "What did you have in mind?"
"That is a surprise," Itachi said. "But since you're up now, why don't you get ready and we can go ahead and go?"
"Mysterious," Sasuke commented. He looked Itachi over in much the same way that his brother had looked at him earlier before tilting his head to the side and adding, "But I like it, so okay."
With that, he kissed his brother on the cheek and started down the hallway so he could grab some secret-date appropriate clothes and take a quick shower. He laughed when he heard Itachi call after him.
"And feel free to raid my closet for something to wear! I'll need something to remember when I'm here all alone tonight!"
About twenty minutes later, Sasuke was sitting in the passenger's seat of Itachi's car, dressed in one of his brother's t-shirts and a pair of his own jeans. Which Itachi had assured him was more than an appropriate outfit for wherever he was whisking him away to.
And for the first couple minutes of the drive, Sasuke tried to figure out where they were heading. He'd lived in the village all his life, after all. So, he figured it couldn't exactly be hard to puzzle out where they were going once he oriented himself after a few turns, but, boy…
It turned out the village was big. Really big.
Like, had it always been this big? kind of big.
Which was the exact question Sasuke ended up asking himself the further and further they went, not only past the Uchiha compound, but the Hyuga compound and the entrance to the Nara Forest, too. Until eventually houses started to fall away altogether, only to be replaced with an unexpected and somewhat startling amount of trees that reminded Sasuke of one too many horror movies that he'd seen as they drove straight into the thick of them.
And just as he was starting to think there was no possible way they could go anywhere other than further and further into the slowly darkening woods, until they either got lost or ran out of gas (at which point they would either be hunted by a serial killer or found by a hungry family of cannibals), Itachi took a right turn and they suddenly started up an incline and the trees disappeared, too.
"What…in the world…" Sasuke whispered slowly in amazement.
"I found this place by accident about a year ago," Itachi commented as the incline leveled out. Sasuke looked over at him.
"But where are we?" he couldn't help but ask.
Because wherever it was, it seemed like nature itself didn't want them there as grass and bushes looked like they were actively trying to reclaim the winding, gravel road.
"You'll see," Itachi answered, shooting him a quick glance. Then he pointed toward the passenger window and said, "Look."
As soon as he did, Sasuke immediately regretted it. They were high up, higher than he'd ever been, and the edge of the road wasn't that far away, which meant they were only a short way from a long fall. Despite the vague feeling of fear starting to pound in his chest though, he couldn't look away. And the longer he stared out at the expanse of sky in front of him, the more he could focus on things besides how high up they were.
Like the way the entire village was spread out below them. Not teeny tiny, but miniature enough that the people he saw going about their days looked small enough to fit in the palm of his hand and the shops and houses and schools all looked like they could have been toys.
It was amazing to see, really. But even more amazing was the fact that they were up here at all. Watching everything and everyone carry on with their life and day and routine, completely oblivious to them.
It made him feel like they were unrecognizable. Like they were free to actually be themselves, away from the scrutinous gaze of their family, of the village, of the entire world even. In a way that was similar, but still different from how he'd felt in Suna. There, the world had still gone on around them and they had been just one piece of it, but here…
Well, here, it seemed like they were the only two people that existed.
And that feeling only escalated when Itachi stopped and pulled over after a few minutes once they reached what looked like the end of the road. He got out and motioned for Sasuke to follow him, and while he hesitated for the briefest of seconds, Sasuke did and they walked over near the edge of the cliff where a small line of trees led them into a little clearing.
It looked strangely out of place and was a little more well-kept and looked after than the road leading up to it. Like someone had been doing their best to hide it for who knew how long and they'd just stumbled across their secret.
The thought made Sasuke look over to his brother to suggest that maybe they should leave. Because whoever was taking care of this place probably wouldn't appreciate them being there, but Itachi wasn't at his side anymore. His brother had walked over to the edge of the cliff, where a wooden guardrail stood as the only thing to stop someone from walking right over the edge.
And even though something deep down in him told Sasuke that he shouldn't follow, he did. Because if his brother wasn't scared then he had no need to be either.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Itachi commented, glancing over at him when Sasuke stopped beside him and put his hands on the guardrail so he could remind himself that it was there and he wasn't going to topple over into the abyss.
"It is," he answered.
And it was. Terrifying, sure, but beautiful, nonetheless.
At least, until he looked straight down. Then it was just plain terrifying as his vision swam and a low, swooping feeling settled in his stomach, making him clutch the guardrail for dear life as he took in the long fall in front of him as well as some strange, jutting shapes in the rock below.
"Do you know where we are?"
Itachi put his hand on the small of Sasuke's back when he asked the question, rubbing his thumb back and forth slowly. His first instinct was, naturally, to move away (they were still in the village, after all, no matter how far away it felt like they were). But instead, Sasuke just glanced back over his shoulder to confirm that, indeed, no one was around before he stepped a little bit closer to Itachi.
"I have no idea," he answered.
"Not even a guess?"
He shook his head as he looked around again, making sure to keep his eyes more or less trained ahead and not look down because no, thank you.
"Give me a hint."
"I feel like that'll make it too easy, but okay," Itachi said before humming softly like he was thinking of the best way to phrase his next words. "It's a mountain."
"Well, I could've told you that," Sasuke retorted.
Itachi bumped against his side at the snarky comment and Sasuke shot him a grin.
"I don't know how much more you need then," Itachi said. "You can literally see it from everywhere in the village."
"You can…what?" Sasuke mumbled under his breath, thinking on his brother's words for a couple of seconds, but only one thing came to mind and he didn't know if he could quite believe it. So he leaned over the guardrail a bit to look back down over the edge, this time making sure to only pay attention to the strange shapes of the rocks directly below him until he laughed and pointed down to a particular spot to their right.
"Is that the third Hokage's nose?"
Itachi leaned over and looked where he was pointing but shook his head.
"No, I'm pretty sure that's the second Hokage's nose," he said. Then he pointed to the left instead. "Because that is definitely the Third's."
They laughed together at that and Itachi spent a couple minutes pointing out where the other Hokage's faces were on the monument they stood on top of before he took Sasuke's hand and gave it a quick squeeze.
"Let me run back to the car really quick, okay?" he said and Sasuke gave him a curious look.
"Is everything okay?"
"Of course!" Itachi assured him, "I didn't bring you up here just to admire the view though; that's just a nice bonus."
Without any further explanation, Itachi walked away, disappearing back through the tree-lined path they'd taken in. He was only gone for a couple of minutes before he returned, hoisting a basket up into the air as soon as he saw Sasuke watching him.
"What's that?" Sasuke called across the clearing.
"Our date," Itachi answered with a smile. And once he stopped in front of Sasuke, his brother put the basket down on the ground and elaborated, "I thought it'd be nice to have a picnic here."
"A picnic? But when did you have time to even put anything together?"
"While you were getting ready," Itachi said with a shrug as he bent over to pull a little blanket out of the basket and lay it out on the ground. "I got some pre-made stuff at the store, but I made the sandwiches at home."
Sasuke shook his head, overly impressed (as usual) with his brother and the care he put into even the smallest things.
"You're something else," he mumbled.
Itachi glanced up at him and grinned. "I hope that's a good thing."
"Always."
They sat down and Itachi put the basket between them, pulling out some sandwiches, rice balls, a couple containers that looked like they had dumplings or something similar in them, and a thermos of tea along with two little cups. They dug in as they watched the sun slowly rise higher in the clear blue sky.
"So, how in the world did you find this place?" Sasuke asked after he'd eaten a couple sandwiches and moved on to grab a rice ball.
Itachi took a long sip of tea before he answered, though he didn't look over at Sasuke as he spoke.
"Sometimes…it's hard for me to sleep," he said quietly, like he wasn't sure if he should admit it or not. "I tend to go drive around when that happens. Try to get my mind off things, you know?"
Sasuke nodded. He didn't understand exactly, since he and sleep were more often than not well acquainted, but he could imagine how he might feel like doing the same thing if he felt restless and cooped up at home.
"Well, one night," Itachi continued, "I decided to go somewhere I hadn't been and—"
"And naturally, you decided to go and get lost in the woods," Sasuke joked.
"Naturally," Itachi agreed with a laugh. Then he shook his head. "No, I had actually read somewhere that there was a park up here. Well, at least until a few years ago. Nobody ever came though, so they decided to move all the stuff that was here down into a few different parks in the village instead. And now this is all that's left of it."
"That's a shame," Sasuke said, but as he thought about it a little more, he wasn't so sure that it was. "With a drive as crazy as that just to get here though, I think I can definitely understand why people never came."
"You're telling me, right? Now, imagine that same drive in the middle of the night, when I had no idea what I was getting myself into…"
Sasuke blew out a dumbfounded breath at the thought. "Maybe you're just crazy."
"Maybe," Itachi said with a shrug. Then he looked over at him and grinned. "But only for you."
"Oh my god!" Sasuke laughed and reached over to push at his brother's shoulder. "And so cheesy, too!"
"You know you like it," Itachi said matter-of-factly.
Sasuke rolled his eyes and just gave his brother a joking, "yeah, yeah," before turning his attention back to his food.
And for a while they sat like that. Just quiet and comfortable in one another's presence as they ate and watched the sun rise higher and higher as the morning drew on. Oblivious to anything aside from this moment and unaware that it would be their last.
XxX
"Here you go, Naruto."
Another large, steaming bowl of ramen was placed in front of Naruto as he sat at the empty bar in Ichiraku. He glanced up at Ayame and gave her a smile.
"Thanks!" he exclaimed before starting to dig in.
Just as he started to bring the first bite to his mouth though, Naruto saw Ayame still watching him and lowered his chopsticks.
"Is everything okay?" he asked.
"I've been meaning to ask you the same thing," she replied.
Naruto lifted an eyebrow in question, and she immediately waved her hand like the whole thing had been a mistake.
"You just seem a little tired, is all," she explained. "And you got here so early this morning, so, I just…"
She waved her hand dismissively again and gave a soft apology, walking away before Naruto had a chance to say anything in reply. He watched her go, debating whether he should call out to her or not, but ultimately ended up looking back down at his food without a word.
After all, what could he say? What explanation could he give that wouldn't be a lie?
She was right, though. He was tired.
Actually, he'd been tired for hours already.
How many hours exactly? Well, that he wasn't sure of. Because he wasn't sure what time it had been when he'd finally pulled himself up out of the dirt outside of Itachi's window.
Whatever time it had been, though, he hadn't gone home. His body had been aching, desperate for sleep, for any type of rest, but something in him refused to go. Instead, he'd wandered the quiet village streets for a time. Long enough that his body finally seemed to get the message that sleep wasn't going to be coming any time soon, and he'd gotten his second wind. Or maybe it had been his third…
Coincidentally, that was also about the time hunger hit him. Hard. And just as the sun had started rising over the buildings around him, he decided he could at least allow himself something and had started in the direction of Ichiraku without giving much thought for whether they were even open or not.
Thankfully, they had been.
Now, three bowls of ramen later though, he could feel himself getting tired again. Which obviously was apparent enough that Ayame was noticing it, too.
But there was something else as well. An undercurrent that had only become clearer and clearer as his hunger had abated. Something he had felt hours ago, crouched outside a window with his phone in his hand.
Excitement.
An anxious excitement was burning through his veins, making his fingers itch with an eager, desperate need to grab his phone out of his pocket and go through the pictures he'd taken once again. To look at the one thing that would serve as his salvation.
No, not his.
Sasuke's.
Sasuke's salvation from his brother. From the disgusting compulsion Itachi had laid out before his dear, innocent Sasuke.
Yes, he had it all here. Everything he needed to put a stop to it all was right—
"Here," he whispered to himself.
"What was that, Naruto?" Ayame called from nearby, turning to look at him.
He froze, realizing that he'd put his chopsticks down at some point and gotten so lost in thought that he'd almost pulled his phone out of his pocket without thinking about it. Now that he was aware again, he pulled his hand away and put it back on the bar.
"Nothing," he said, clearing his throat.
He stared down at his ramen, but he didn't feel hungry anymore. Exhilaration was still zipping through him, making him feel like it would be impossible to keep eating, so he didn't bother.
"Actually," he spoke up again, "I think I'm done, Ayame."
She nodded and walked over, letting him know what he owed before taking the bowls away. Naruto reached for his wallet and froze, eyes widening just a little as he realized he didn't have it with him. He hadn't thought he'd need it with him when he'd left home last night, so he hadn't even bothered to think about it. And now…
Naruto sighed and called out, "Ayame…"
"What is it?" she called with her back to him.
"I'm sorry, but I left my wallet at home, so—"
"So, his food is on me today," a deep voice suddenly rang out from behind him.
Ayame whipped around, her eyes bright and excited as a large hand slapped some money down on the counter next to Naruto. He rolled his eyes, not even needing to look beside him to know who was there.
"Master Jiraiya!" Ayame said excitedly. "Were you here to pick up an order, or—"
"No, unfortunately not today, my dear," Jiraiya said, making Naruto feel like he was going to be sick. "I've actually been looking for this guy here – he slapped his hand on Naruto's back, jolting him forward a little on his stool – so, I'll just take him off your hands."
Ayame gave a little nod and bid Naruto goodbye as he sighed and got off his stool. He shrugged off Jiraiya's hand and turned to leave.
"Now, now, Naruto," Jiraiya said disapprovingly. "Why don't you tell the lovely lady thank you."
"She could be your granddaughter, Pervy Sage," Naruto grumbled under his breath. But then Jiraiya gave him a look, one he recognized after years of having it sent his way both inside and outside of school, and he turned around obediently and gave Ayame a little wave.
"Thanks a lot!" he called out to her. "See you again soon."
"There, now that wasn't so hard, was it?" Jiraiya asked, and his hand fell heavily onto Naruto's shoulder so he could steer him out of the quiet Ichiraku and into the quickly busying streets outside.
As soon as they were a few shops away, Naruto shrugged out of Jiraiya's grip again and stopped, turning toward him.
"How'd you find me?"
Jiraiya laughed. "Kid, you go a total of three places. It wasn't hard to figure it out once I knew you weren't at home."
"Whatever," Naruto scoffed. But he wondered if he really was as predictable as Jiraiya said. "What do you want then?"
"Why don't you tell me," Jiraiya answered.
Before Naruto could shoot back a smart remark, Jiraiya pulled out his phone and tapped the screen a few times before turning it toward Naruto as a video began playing. It was a little grainy and there was no sound, but there didn't need to be any for Naruto to recognize that it was the school's security footage from yesterday.
For a few moments, nothing interesting happened at all. His classmates filed out onto the sidewalk and crossed the street, all heading out for the day. But then he saw it: Sasuke walking across the street, walking toward the slinking mass that could have only been him. The tiny versions of himself and Sasuke stood apart, barely animated until…
The video version of him lunged forward once. Then again after Sasuke pushed him away. After that, things turned to a blur as Itachi and Sakura ran over and pulled the two of them apart.
Naruto looked away once the video finally stopped, and Jiraiya slipped his phone back into his pocket. Silence seemed to fall over the entire street around them as Naruto waited for Jiraiya to scold him like every other day when he ended up in front of the man in the principal's office.
However, when Jiraiya finally did speak, his voice was much softer than what he'd been expecting.
"Did you really think you could hide it from me?" he asked.
"I wasn't trying to hide it from you," Naruto shot back. Quick and defensive.
"Sure, I've heard that before," Jiraiya mumbled, rolling his eyes. Then he sighed and looked at Naruto as he shook his head. "What happened yesterday, Naruto?"
"Nothing happened."
"C'mon, kid, don't give me that," Jiraiya huffed. He reached over and laid his arm across Naruto's shoulders. "I thought you and Sasuke were…friends."
The last word came out carefully. Almost like Jiraiya didn't know whether to choose it or something else.
We were… he thought.
"We are," he said out loud.
"Well, I can't say I've seen many people treat their friends like that. So, why don't you try telling me what really happened, okay?"
Naruto looked down and gave a sigh before he relented, if only to get the man off his back about it. Literally.
"We were dating," he started. "But he dumped me for someone else and I…" He took a few steps forward to put some distance between them and turned back around with a shrug. "I might have gotten angry."
"Might have?" Jiraiya asked, raising an eyebrow skeptically.
Naruto rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest.
"Fine, I was angry," he bit out. "He hurt me, I got angry, and I didn't handle it well. Are you happy now?"
A deep frown pulled at Jiraiya's features and he took a step forward with a sigh. Though, thankfully, he kept his distance.
"I'm not happy that you're upset, Naruto," he said gently. "But being upset doesn't mean what you did was okay."
Naruto opened his mouth, and for a split second he thought about arguing. He thought about pulling out his phone and showing Jiraiya the photos he had. And he thought about how unfair it was that he was the one in the wrong when all he'd done was care about Sasuke.
Even after his heart had been broken.
He didn't argue, though, and he didn't reach for his phone. Neither thing would do him any good.
Instead, he just nodded and said, "I know, and that's why I'm planning to go see him today."
"You are?" Jiraiya asked, looking surprised.
"Of course," he answered evenly, having no reason to lie. "After everything that's happened, I think it's only right that we talk."
"Wow, I can honestly say that I wasn't expecting that from you, kid…" Jiraiya crossed his arms over his chest and looked him up and down a few times, like he was suddenly seeing him in a new light. When he continued, he sounded impressed, if not a little hesitant, "And as much as I agree that that would be best, are you sure you're okay to talk with him today, so soon after what happened?"
If Jiraiya had asked him that any other day, Naruto would have said no. Last week he would have easily still chosen to hide away in an empty classroom or sulk alone in his house. Hell, he didn't know if he'd even still have the balls to try and do it tomorrow. But today…
Well, today his phone felt heavy in his pocket against his thigh, heavy with the proof that it held. Today his blood felt like electricity despite (or maybe because of) the sleep deprivation. Today, for the first time since they'd broken up, he finally felt like something was going right and he wanted to take advantage of that.
Today, Naruto felt invincible.
Mostly importantly, though, today was the only day that he knew Sasuke would be alone. Or at least outside of his brother's grasp and watchful gaze, even if it was only for an hour or two.
And an hour was all that he'd need.
XxX
"Are you sure you still want to do this?" Itachi asked once he stopped at the curb outside of Sakura's house and turned off his car.
Right at first, Sasuke thought about playing dumb and asking just what his brother meant. But he could already imagine the blank, unamused look he'd get in response even before the words could start to form on his tongue, so he stopped himself. Because even though they hadn't done more than lightly joke around the subject throughout the day, they both already knew well enough what Itachi meant.
"I guess I don't really have a reason not to," he finally answered with a shrug.
"Okay, then let me ask you this instead…" Itachi said evenly. "Do you need to? Because we can leave; we can go and enjoy our night. I don't think Sakura would blame you for changing your mind. I mean, not after…"
His brother trailed off, but after yesterday didn't need to be said.
And Sasuke thought about it. For a long, long moment he really did. After all, it would be easier to just go back to Itachi's, to run away from whatever questions and interrogation Sakura would have in store for him. The problem was it wouldn't mean he'd get away from it forever. Just for another night, or for the rest of the weekend, or for a week if he tried hard enough to avoid her.
But when he tried to explain that to Itachi, it just ended up sounding like he was just trying to talk himself into it. Probably because he was.
"I think it's best that I do it tonight. I mean, Sakura said that she told Naruto not to come, so it'll just be the two of us. And I'm sure she'd appreciate seeing me, since I know she's bound to have been worried… So, yeah, I guess I do need to do it."
"Alright, I understand," Itachi said. "But before you go, would it be alright if I ask you something? About what happened, I mean?"
Sasuke took in a long, slow breath and looked over at his brother. He met Itachi's eyes in the dim light that shone into the car from the streetlight a few feet away and thought about saying no. About telling Itachi that he wasn't ready to talk about any of it yet and just asking for more time to think, to pretend, to forget.
But he couldn't do that. Not if he was still planning to go inside and face Sakura at any rate. Because he knew Sakura wasn't going to let him off easy. She was worried just like Itachi was and she'd have questions, too. But he felt he at least owed it to his boyfriend to let him ask his questions first.
So, he nodded and let out a soft, "Okay."
"Okay," Itachi repeated. "I didn't want to ask this morning because I figured you probably still needed some time and I wanted us to enjoy our day, but… But are you okay, Sasuke?"
The question took him by surprise in the same way it had when Itachi had asked him last night. Not because he wasn't expecting it, but because…
Well, because he still just didn't know.
He felt fine. On the outside at least. Sure, he had bruises. Nasty, ugly looking things that he'd made sure were covered as much as possible. But bruises were bruises. He'd had them before and he'd have them again in his life. They hurt, but it wasn't debilitating, and he knew that he'd live and he'd heal. Until, eventually, it would look like it had never happened in the first place.
But it had happened.
And as much as he didn't want to acknowledge it, his heart raced a little with every notification he got on his phone. Waiting for Naruto to text or call even after he'd blocked his number last night. And his eyes searched out every corner and shadow they could perceive, expecting Naruto to pop out at any given moment to grab him again, or… Or something worse.
So, was he okay mentally? Unfortunately, that remained to be seen.
"I still don't know, Itachi," he answered, his voice quiet between them. He shook his head. "I'm sorry, but I just don't know."
"No, hey, no," Itachi said quickly, reaching out to take his hand as he shifted a little in his seat so he could turn and look at him better. "You have nothing to apologize for. At all. Okay?"
Sasuke nodded, but he didn't say saying.
He knew he had no reason to apologize for his feelings, or for the fact that he just hadn't completely processed everything yet. After all, one night of trying to ignore his problems wasn't exactly conducive to healthily sorting out whatever was going on in his head. But knowing that didn't stop him from feeling bad for not having a better answer for Itachi.
Or for himself.
And that thought made him sigh.
"What is it?" Itachi asked, tilting his head a little in question.
"Nothing," Sasuke said. But then he shook his head, like he was trying to erase that one word.
Because it wasn't nothing. His feelings weren't nothing. And even though he might not have all the right words to try and explain, Itachi was here to listen to him. All he had to do was just open his mouth.
And he started to do exactly that when a soft buzz, buzz from his pocket stopped him cold.
Suddenly, just like the few other times it had happened during the day, his heart skipped a beat and Sasuke felt himself unconsciously hold his breath as he pulled his phone out of his pocket to check who it was. Feeling anxiety tighten and tighten and tighten in his chest with every second and every inch of the blacked-out screen that he saw—only for it to immediately give way to relief when his phone brightened and he saw that it was only a message from Sakura.
Not Naruto.
Because it couldn't be Naruto.
But even as he tried to reassure himself of that, Sasuke swiped at his phone, ignoring Sakura's text so he could go look in his contacts and triple (or was it quadruple?) check for the day that he had indeed blocked Naruto's number.
Do you want to unblock this contact? he read when he pulled up Naruto's contact information.
He pressed his thumb down firmly against the "No" option and sighed in relief.
"Is everything okay, Sasuke?" Itachi asked from beside him, pulling his attention away from his phone and back to his brother.
"Yeah, I just…" he lifted his darkened phone and gestured with it vaguely as he shook his head. "Sakura texted me, is all."
"Oh, I guess she's probably waiting for you to go inside," Itachi noted.
Sasuke didn't miss the disappointment in his brother's voice.
"Yeah, probably…"
Sasuke didn't know what to say after that. The last thing he wanted to do was leave now, after he'd been so close to saying…well, something about everything that had happened, but the moment that had been there seemed like it had been shattered. And now it was like both of them were just waiting for the inevitable moment when he stepped out of the car and said goodbye.
It was a sad kind of feeling and definitely not the way he wanted to leave his brother, so he looked over and gave Itachi an apologetic smile. One that he hoped his brother would understand.
"When I get back later, we can talk some more. About everything," he added quickly.
"Sure, that sounds good," Itachi said with a nod. "You'll call me when you're ready to come home so I can come pick you up, right?"
"Yeah, I will," he answered, smiling just a little bit at the thought of Itachi's house being home.
"Good. Then go and have a good time with your friend," Itachi said, waving him away jokingly. "And don't think about me. Sitting at home. Aaaall alone…"
"I'll do my best," he said with a laugh before he opened the door. Silently thanking Itachi for letting them part on a higher note as he got out of the car.
Before he shut the door though, he ducked down and said, "Text me when you get home, that way I know you're safe, okay?"
Itachi smiled and said, "Okay," and then Sasuke closed the door.
He waved goodbye as his brother pulled away from the curb and drove off in the direction of his house, and Sasuke stood there until he couldn't see Itachi's car anymore. Then and only then, did he finally take a breath to steady himself before he walked up the path to Sakura's house and knocked on the door.
He only had to wait until the count of three before the door swung open and—
"Sasuke!"
"Hey Sak—oof."
The air was pushed out of him when she pulled him into a tight, crushing hug.
"I'm so glad you're here," she said against his shoulder. "I was worried you weren't going to come over after all."
"Well, I did make you a promise," he said as he hugged her back.
"I know, but – she let out a little incredulous huff and shook her head – after what happened…"
She pulled away as she trailed off, but Sasuke couldn't bring himself to meet her eye as he just muttered a quiet, "Yeah…"
And just like that, an awkward silence settled over them as they stood in the doorway. Sasuke feeling like he was suddenly under a microscope as she studied him and Sakura… Well, knowing her, she was probably trying to decide whether the moment called for a nosy best friend or an overbearing mother hen. Neither of which sounded like particularly great options in Sasuke's opinion, though.
So, as far as long, awkward moments went, this was a solid 10 out of 10, would not recommend.
But when Sakura finally broke the silence (rather thankfully, he had to add, because he had no idea what he was supposed to say when she was staring at him like he was a kicked puppy) it was with a question that Sasuke hadn't expected at all.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"Um…" he paused and narrowed his eyes, knowing the question had to be a trick. But he still answered with a hesitant, questioning, "No?"
She nodded a couple times before she shrugged and just said, "Okay."
Then she turned around, gesturing for him to follow before she started to walk into the house. Like absolutely nothing had happened.
"I ordered pizza a little bit ago, so that should be here soon, but I've got a bunch of snacks out back. So, we can—"
"Woah, woah, wait," Sasuke said, shaking his head. He was still standing on the little doormat outside that had a cheery welcome written on it, dumbstruck that she was acting like…like…definitely not the Sakura he knew, that much was sure.
She looked back at him curiously, "What?"
"That's it?" he asked.
"What do you mean, Sasuke?"
"You know what I mean!"
The words came out a little louder than he'd meant them to and he quickly shot a look back behind him to make sure there wasn't anyone out on the street who'd heard him before he finally stepped into the house. He pushed the door closed and walked over to Sakura, dropping his voice to a near whisper as he tried to explain.
"You just said okay! You didn't ask any questions. You didn't try to, like, you know…"
He gestured at her with his hands, but the words be you didn't come out.
"You said you didn't want to talk about it," she said, giving him a look like he was the crazy one.
"Well, yeah, I don't, but when have you ever done what I wanted?"
That seemed to catch her up a little and even though she opened her mouth to shoot back some type of snide remark, the most that came out was an indignant, "Wha—!"
He pointed at her like that just proved his entire point. "You know it's true! So, what's going on? Who are you? Where's my Sakura?"
She rolled her eyes at his dramatics.
"You're ridiculous."
"Yeah, maybe," he admitted. "But you're… You're…"
"Look, Sasuke," she said. Stopping him before he hurt himself with how up in arms he seemed to be over the fact that she was respecting his choice not to talk about things. "I know that sometimes I can be a little…"
"Overbearing?" he offered helpfully.
She tilted her head and raised an eyebrow at him, unamused.
"I was going to say that I know I can be a little more concerned than I need to be sometimes, but you're my friend and I worry about you. I mean, someone kinda has to, otherwise it's gonna be junior high all over again—"
"You promised you'd stop bringing that up!"
"—but this is different, Sasuke," she continued, ignoring his complaint as she lowered her voice like she was about to tell him a secret. "Do I want to know how you're feeling and if you're okay? Of course I do. But if you don't want to talk about it now, then I'm not going to make you."
Sasuke pressed his lips together tightly at her words, stuck somewhere between a smile and a frown as he felt himself get a little choked up.
"Well, thank you."
"You're welcome," she said and gave him a smile. "Now if you decide you want to talk, I'm right here, but all I want is for us to have a good time tonight. I think we could both use it, don't you?"
"That does sound really good," he agreed with a nod.
And even though he still felt a little shocked that their conversation hadn't devolved into the interrogation he'd been dreading, he suddenly felt a lot better about the evening. So much so, that when Sakura grabbed his hand to lead him through the house and out into the backyard, he gave it a little squeeze.
"Now, c'mon!" she said excitedly, "I can't wait to show you this set up!"
XxX
A little while later, they were both sitting in outdoor lounge chairs that had been set up on either side of a long table full of snacks and drinks. Surround sound speakers had been put up around the yard and there were little lights strung up from thin poles that gave the entire area a soft, movie theater kind of feel. Which was obviously very fitting since a tall projector screen sat about ten or fifteen feet away from them, glowing with the paused title screen of the action movie Sakura had decided on a few minutes ago.
"You know, we can just pause the movie once the pizza gets here," Sasuke noted as he listened to her grumble at her phone for the third or fourth time since they'd come outside.
"I know," she groaned. "But you know I hate doing that! And I mean, the app says the driver isn't that far away, so I know as soon as I start the movie they'd be here."
"Then maybe starting it will summon them?" he suggested.
But she ignored him in favor of refreshing the tracking app that she'd been stalking since they'd gotten out to the backyard and Sasuke shrugged. It wasn't really worth the argument anyway, he decided. Both because he couldn't imagine that it'd be that much longer, and because it gave him an excuse to be on his own phone, too.
Or to be more precise, it gave him an excuse to text his brother. Which was exactly what he'd been doing since about the time he'd sat down, giving Itachi a play-by-play of their pizza-less woes.
Okay, he might have also mentioned that he wasn't exactly having the terrible time he'd been expecting. But Itachi was definitely a little more hung up on the pizza thing, judging by the text that popped up on his screen.
"Is it weird that I want to go pick up a pizza now and bring it over there myself just so I can see you?"
"A little." Sasuke sent in reply, but there was a smile on his face. Then he quickly added, "But if you get here faster than this delivery person, Sakura might actually invite you to stay as a thank you…"
"Hmm, really now? Well, don't mind me; I'll just be over here. Casually searching for the quickest pizza places nearby. For no reason whatsoever."
Sasuke chuckled a little bit and started to reply when they heard the doorbell ring in the house through the open backdoor.
"Heeey, finally," he said, looking over at Sakura as she jumped up eagerly.
"You're telling me!"
She hurried inside, pulling the cash she'd been holding onto out of her pocket as she went. And once she'd disappeared through the doorway, Sasuke looked back down at his phone and let Itachi know the disappointing news.
"Sorry, looks like the delivery person beat you here."
"Damn. A good plan foiled."
Sasuke shook his head at that.
"You're cute." He sent. Then he thought about it and added, "And weird."
"And you love me. So that says more about you than me."
From inside, Sasuke could make out Sakura telling the delivery person thanks, so he sighed and sent Itachi another message.
"I guess it does, but I'm not complaining. At least, not about that. I do have to go though. Mom would be angry at me if she thought I was ignoring my host just to text a boy, so I'll call you in a little while when we're done."
"I'll make sure to let mom know your manners are intact. Have a good time! I love you."
He was just about to reply when Sakura came through the backdoor, holding two pizza boxes triumphantly in the air.
"I have pizza!" she announced.
"My hero," he said with a laugh. "I don't know what I would've done without you."
"Not had pizza, that's for sure," she said, putting them down in the empty space on the table between them. "It's Kiba doing deliveries tonight and he has Akamaru with him."
"Oh no."
"Oooh, yes," Sakura said, rolling her eyes in irritation as she put her hands on her hips and looked down at him. "I swear, Sasuke, I thought I was going to have to wrestle that dog for—"
DING DONG
Sakura stopped mid-frustrated ramble and looked at the backdoor curiously when they heard the doorbell ring again.
"Who is that?" she asked aloud.
He shrugged, but offered the only answer he could think of, "Kiba?"
Her eyes narrowed as she thought of that and then she patted her pockets. Apparently, something wasn't right judging by the annoyed sigh she blew out.
"He didn't give me my change," she grumbled and walked back into the house. As she went, Sasuke heard her start to shout, "Kiba, if that dog isn't in your car, then I'm…" but it trailed off when she got too far away.
Sasuke shook his head and took the opportunity to send Itachi a quick, "I love you too" before he grabbed some pizza and scrolled through his phone to kill time while he waited for Sakura to come back.
Only, he kept waiting. And waiting.
And waiting…
It wasn't until he was halfway through his second slice of pizza that he realized just how long Sakura had been gone though, and he looked up from his phone.
"Sakura?" he called out. "Is everything okay?"
There wasn't a reply. Which he supposed wasn't that weird, but he still put his slice of pizza back in the box as he pulled up his text messages. Just to make sure Sakura hadn't let him know that she had gotten side-tracked inside and he'd just missed the message somehow.
But he didn't even get as far as backing out of his conversation with Itachi when he heard Sakura's voice from inside. Raised and obviously upset by something, but not clear enough for him to make out exactly what it was.
"Sakura?" he called again.
This time, when she still didn't respond to him, he got up and went inside to check on her. As he walked through the kitchen and into the living room, he could hear her voice before he could see her. It was hushed and angry, and she was talking quickly so he didn't catch everything. But what he did catch made him frown.
"…I told you already that you can't do this. You can't be—"
"Is everything okay, Sakura?" he asked, cutting her off as he turned the corner to the entryway and saw her standing with the door mostly closed and her body blocking what little space was open.
"Everything's fine, Sasuke!" she chimed quickly, whipping her head around to look at him.
But her voice was too high. The muscles in her neck too tense. And she had moved just a little too much, so Sasuke could clearly see what she was trying to hide.
And it wasn't fine.
It wasn't fine at all.
"What're you doing here, Naruto?" he asked when he locked eyes with the other boy. Sounding a lot calmer and more collected than he felt.
"I'm—"
"Leaving," Sakura said loudly, talking over Naruto. But the blond shook his head.
"I came to talk to you, Sasuke."
"Well… I don't want to talk to you," he managed to get out. Then he looked from Naruto to Sakura and said, "I thought you told him not to come."
"I did," she said quickly, looking apologetic despite having nothing to do with what was going on. "And I've been asking him to leave for almost ten minutes, but he won't go."
"Because I need to talk to Sasuke," Naruto said adamantly.
"He doesn't want to talk to you, Naruto!" Sakura shot at him. "Don't you get that? So, you need to leave before—"
"Before I call my dad," Sasuke cut in.
He started to reach for his phone but stopped when Naruto let out a laugh.
"Be my guest," he said, gesturing toward Sasuke's pocket. "But I really don't think you'll want him finding out about this."
That made Sasuke narrow his eyes, curious as to what exactly Naruto meant. He didn't drop his hand though and was ready to take his phone out to call his dad or someone at the station if he needed to even as he spoke.
"About what? What're you talking about?"
Naruto shrugged. He looked back at Sakura.
"Why don't you let me in and I can tell you? We can talk; that's all I want."
Sakura took in a deep breath and turned to look at Sasuke, putting the ball in his court on what she was supposed to do.
"You don't have to talk to him, Sasuke. Not if you don't want to," she said, trying to remind him that he did still have that option.
Which, sure, he knew that he did, but there was something in the way that Naruto was holding himself. Something in his tone that made Sasuke's heart drop into his stomach like a stone. And, suddenly, he knew that he needed to know. Because whatever had brought the blond over here in the first place wasn't going to go away just because Naruto left.
"It's okay…" Sasuke said hesitantly. "Let him in."
Sakura pursed her lips but nodded and stepped out of the way, pulling the door open the rest of the way so Naruto could come inside. She closed the door behind him and stood off to the side. Ready to either open the door to see Naruto out or attack, depending on how the next few moments went.
"Well, what do you want?" Sasuke asked after Naruto stopped an arms-length away from him.
The blond turned and looked at Sakura briefly, giving her a smile before he turned his attention back to Sasuke and said, "I think it might be best if we talk alone."
"Not a chance," Sakura said before Sasuke could and he nodded in agreement.
"Alright, whatever," Naruto mumbled with a shrug.
They waited for him to go on. To broach whatever subject he'd deemed so important that he'd had to do all of this for, but he didn't say anything. Instead, Naruto looked him over for a second like he was debating something before he shook his head and took out his phone.
As Naruto tapped at the screen, Sakura tried to look over his shoulder to see what exactly he was doing but he was too quick. And before Sakura could even push herself up onto her tiptoes, Naruto had seemed to find what he was looking for and handed his phone to Sasuke.
"What is this?" Sasuke asked without glancing down.
"I think you'll be able to figure it out," Naruto answered.
And, unfortunately, Naruto was right.
Because as soon as Sasuke looked down, he knew exactly what it was and he felt his heart stutter in his chest.
"Where did you get this?" he asked immediately.
But Naruto didn't answer. No, the blond took Sasuke's surprise as an opportunity to step a little closer to him so he could reach out and swipe his finger across the screen once.
Then again.
And again.
And again.
"And I still have more," Naruto whispered as he continued to prove it.
With every silent swipe of Naruto's finger after that, Sasuke felt himself grow numb as he watched picture after picture appear and then disappear before his eyes. Starting tame, though still badly enough, with one that just featured himself and his brother kissing on Itachi's couch. But they quickly devolved from there until Sasuke was shirtless, his brother was disheveled, and the two of them were heading down the hall together. Leaving almost nothing to the imagination as to what might have happened after that.
But Sasuke knew, and when he looked up, he knew Naruto did, too.
"What do you want?" he asked.
"I think that should be pretty obvious," Naruto answered, his voice still quiet between them. "I want you to leave him."