Warnings: Incest

A Family Affair

Chapter Twelve

The rest of Sasuke's weekend was absolute hell. He slept in fits and starts at night, constantly dodged his mother's concerned glances during the day, and had to stop himself every few minutes from reaching for any of the phones around the house as he became more and more overwhelmed by the impulse to call Itachi again and…and…

And what? Sasuke had thought to himself every time. Apologize to him? Explain what had happened?

Sure, in theory, both of those seemed like good options (or at the very least, good starting points). But every time Sasuke had considered it, he also remembered Naruto's warning, the threat of the pictures that he held over Sasuke's head like an executioner's blade waiting to fall. And then he would draw his hand back to himself and sigh out a silent apology to his brother. And to himself.

So, rather understandably, by the time the weekend was over, Sasuke was exhausted. And while the last thing he wanted to do was to go to school after everything he'd been through, he needed to talk to someone. He needed to get everything off his chest. (Okay, maybe not everything everything but enough that he wouldn't feel like he was drowning anymore.) And in order to do that, he needed to get out of his house and away from his mother's prying eyes and ears so he could spill his guts to the only person he trusted to listen: Sakura.

Thankfully, she didn't need much convincing to come over and walk with him to school. Not that he thought that she would, considering she'd almost been as bad as his mom yesterday, texting him every couple of hours to make sure that he was alright. But still, when she showed up at the door and whisked him away by the elbow, Sasuke couldn't deny that he was relieved.

And for the next thirty minutes the two of them walked aimlessly through the streets of Konoha. Sometimes they'd head in the general direction of school, but then Sasuke would say something that would make Sakura's eyes widen just a bit and she would lead him down a road they didn't need to take, granting him more and more time to tell her exactly what had happened.

And he did.

He told her that he had, in fact, cheated on Naruto. He expressed his guilt over that and explained that he had just realized too late that it was never Naruto he'd liked in the first place, but someone else—someone he refused to name despite the long, pointed look she gave him. He told her what he'd only found out when Naruto had told him on Saturday, that the blond had apparently gotten suspicious of the reason Sasuke had broken up with him, so much so that he'd resorted to spying on him. Then he told her exactly what had happened on Saturday night.

Right down to why he'd had to leave and why he had refused to answer any of her text messages since then.

"Are you serious?" she asked, looking at him incredulously the moment he took a pause longer than the space of a breath.

Her tone sounded like she hoped that he wasn't—that he'd been lying about the whole thing. Which was a feeling he understood well since from the moment the words had come out of Naruto's mouth on Saturday, Sasuke wished all of it had been a lie. That he'd wake up in his brother's bed any second, having dreamt up nothing more than a ridiculous nightmare.

But here he was, rehashing the bitter details of it all instead.

"Yeah, I'm serious."

"Wow…"

Sakura didn't say anything else past that and they walked in silence, slowly making their way back to the point where they could either turn and go around the block again or continue on their way to school. But the quiet and the anticipation of waiting for her to say something, to judge him for what he did, quickly became deafening to Sasuke. Filling him with worry as he started to wonder if maybe he'd said too much.

He'd just laid almost all of himself bare in front of her, after all. Letting her know that every whispered rumor she'd heard about him in their school's halls was true. Admitting that he was exactly what so many people thought about him.

Except even that wasn't quite true because he had still kept the worst secret locked way inside of himself. A secret that he had once been convinced that no one would ever even think to guess at, but that Naruto had figured out with little difficulty.

And if Naruto could do it, then he knew Sakura definitely could, too. She was smart. Too smart for her own good most of the time, and all she would need were a few misplaced words or for Sasuke to have slipped up when recounting something. Then his story would unravel even further, until she figured out that the mysterious guy he had cheated on Naruto with was a lot more than just his boyfriend.

Which was exactly what he was expecting once Sakura stopped at the corner when they reached the crossroads and turned to face him. Her eyebrows were furrowed and her face was a mask of concern (or was that disgust?) but when she spoke, he was surprised by her words.

"Do you want me to tell him what happened?"

"What?" Sasuke asked quickly, momentarily confused by her words since his head was still spinning with anticipation of her accusation. But then Sakura clarified.

"Your boyfriend," she said. "Do you want me to talk to him? Tell him what happened? That way he'll understand that it wasn't really your idea to break up with him."

For the briefest of moments, this seemed like a wonderful idea and a spark of hope fluttered to life in Sasuke's chest. His mind shifted gears away from worrying about what Sakura might have thought about him to what he could have Sakura say to Itachi.

But…wait.

Itachi.

The energetic, borderline giddy thoughts came crashing to a halt as suddenly as they had begun when Sasuke reminded himself that accepting her offer would mean that he'd have to tell her everything. Like, everything everything this time and not just the version of events that made him seem better than he truly was. And he knew that she wouldn't look at him the same once she knew the truth, let alone still agree to help him.

So he quickly said, "No."

Sakura's face fell. "But why not?"

"I just…" There was no way he could explain. No way that he could make it all make sense. So he didn't try. He pressed his lips together into a thin line and looked down, focusing on a long crack in the pavement by their feet. When he spoke again, his voice was softer, resigned, and the words were ones he had practiced telling himself over and over again as he laid in bed last night, thinking of his brother, "It's just better this way, Sakura."

There was a beat, a moment of quiet between them where Sasuke was sure that he must have convinced her, was sure that she would drop the subject the way she had dropped trying to push him to tell her what was going on when he got to her house on Saturday. But then she let out a loud scoff and Sasuke looked back up at her just in time to see her rolling her eyes.

"Uh, no," she said. "I don't think so."

Sasuke frowned.

"Sakura—"

"No, Sasuke," she said, quickly cutting him off. Her tone was sharp, the way it got when she wasn't going to take no for an answer (which was most of the time). "This guy was the first thing to make you happy—like really happy, in years! So why shouldn't I do this for you?"

Sasuke opened his mouth to answer, to tell her the hundred and one ways that were running through his head but she held up her hand to silence him before he even made a noise.

"No, don't answer that." She put her hands on her hips and gave him a hard look. "Because whatever the reason is, I don't care."

"But, Naruto—" he tried to argue.

"Screw Naruto!" she exclaimed, seeming exasperated that he was bothering to argue with her. But then she softened her gaze and stepped closer to him.

"Listen, Sasuke," she said, her voice quieter. She put her hands on his shoulders. "What Naruto did was out of line, and I can understand why you're feeling the way you are."

I doubt it, he thought, but he kept the comment to himself as she continued.

"But you're my best friend and I want you to be happy. So," she tilted her head down slightly to look at him through her determined brow. "I'm going to do this for you, okay? Just tell me who the guy is."

"No," Sasuke said quietly, shaking his head.

Sakura's face fell. The determination that had been set on it slowly morphed to anger before finally settling into confusion as she studied him. Her hands slipped from his shoulders slowly, like she didn't really want to let him go but that the fight had been sucked out of her with his answer.

"Why not?" she asked.

"I already told you," he said quietly. "Because it's better this way."

With that, Sasuke turned and headed on without her, turning to go to school no matter how desperately his legs ached to carry him back home. Or somewhere that he didn't run the risk of facing Itachi, of facing the heartbreak of it all again.

But Sakura's words rang in his ears as he walked the rest of the way. The determination she'd had had made him feel, for a moment, like there could have been a chance for them, for he and Itachi, but…

Sasuke shook his head.

No, he thought. It is better this way…

XxX

So, yeeeah… No matter what Sasuke said, it definitely wasn't better this way. Sakura was sure of that.

It had taken her a minute or two to recover from his outright and, honestly, pretty depressing rejection of her idea before she had continued on to school after him earlier, but that hadn't meant that she'd given up on helping him of course. After all, what kind of friend would she really be if she actually listened to his obviously bad ideas?

So, no, she hadn't given up. In fact, she spent all of her time in her classes that morning listening intently to her classmates as they chit-chatted with one another about graduation and their summer plans. Watching and observing them as closely as she could.

Now, obviously, she didn't know exactly what she was looking for, but she was assuming that since Sasuke seemed so head over heels for whoever his mystery guy was, that the guy had to have felt the same. Because if he didn't then…

Well, then there would be a whole different conversation she'd have to have with the guy.

But since she was going on the assumption that he returned Sasuke's feelings (at least until proven otherwise), she started by looking for any guy who shared Sasuke's depressed and broken-hearted look because… Well, because it was at least a place to start.

She realized pretty quickly that this was much easier said than done, however. And after spending the first few periods of her day studying her fellow classmate to no avail, she met back up with Sasuke again when lunch rolled around and initiated Plan B—pester Sasuke until he gave her an answer. Or, at the very least, some kind of information to go on past the general idea of "sad boy."

She didn't say anything to him about it though until they were outside, sitting more or less alone under the shade of a tree on the school's front lawn to eat their lunch. (Because she definitely wasn't about to make Sasuke spend anymore time around Naruto than he already had to.) But once they were comfortable all bets were off, and Sakura pulled out a sandwich she'd packed with her and took a bite before launching full force into Plan B.

"So, I've been trying to figure out who he is all day," she said conversationally once she swallowed. Then she added, just for clarity's sake, "You know, your mystery man."

Sasuke glanced over at her. He'd been reaching for his bag, presumably for his own lunch, but his hands froze briefly before he drew them back closer to himself and frowned.

"I thought I told you to drop it," he said.

"Yeah, you might have mentioned that, but…" she trailed off and shrugged.

"Then why won't you?"

"I thought I already told you why."

"Yeah," he answered snidely. "You might have mentioned it, but…"

She grinned a little to herself when Sasuke threw her words back at her. To her, it meant he wasn't angry at her for pushing, which was good. And she took it as a sign that she could go ahead and push some more.

"Why don't you just tell me something about him at least?" she urged. "That why it's a little easier to guess."

"How about I don't?" he shot back quickly.

"Aww, c'mon Sasuke!"

She reached over and pushed at his knee a little, trying to keep the atmosphere light and friendly. But it was clear when he looked away that she hadn't been successful, so she let out a little sigh and sat her sandwich down on the napkin it had been wrapped in.

"Okay, I get it," she said softly. "But I'm trying to help, Sasuke."

He was quiet for a long time after that. Long enough that Sakura started to worry that he was never going to say anything. But, eventually, he glanced in her direction and shook his head gently.

"I know you are," he said with a sigh. "But this isn't something you can fix, Sakura."

The outright discouragement gave her pause just like it had this morning, but she was prepared for it this time. And even though her lips twitched downward briefly, she forced herself to keep talking. Because as long as she could keep talking — could keep Sasuke talking — then this wasn't all a lost cause.

"Well, that's because you haven't given me a chance to try," she said, like it was obvious that that was the problem. "So, I'll tell you what, I'll just throw out some names and some general questions and all you need to do is just give me some kind of sign if I get it right, okay?"

Sasuke sighed again. "Sakura—"

"No, it's perfect, Sasuke!" she exclaimed, holding up a hand to stop his argument before it started. "That way you still aren't actually telling me anything, so you can keep brooding about it—"

"I'm not—"

"—and I can try to get some information about the guy!"

Sasuke pursed his lips and grabbed his bag and, for a terrified heartbeat, Sakura worried that she had pushed too much and that he was going to leave. Relief washing through her though when he just pulled a bottle of water out of his bag and uncapped it.

"If it'll make you drop this, then ask all the questions you want," he said, bringing the bottle up to his lips. Before he took a drink, he added, "But I'm not telling you anything."

A grin broke over Sakura's lips as he drank. That was okay with her. After all, she'd known Sasuke since they were eight, so she didn't need him to say something in order to tell her anything. Just a look, a variation in his expression, would be enough to tell her all she needed to know and set her in the right direction.

So, she started, getting the easy things out of the way first and listing the names of some of the guys they knew like Kiba, Lee, Choji, and a few others. (None of them actually struck her as Sasuke's type, but she wanted to make sure she was covering her bases.) When there was no change to Sasuke's expression though, as she assumed there wouldn't be, she continued on to others.

"Okay, is it Neji?" she asked. Again no change. So she tried, "Or Sai?"

This time, Sasuke's expression did change. However, it wasn't exactly what she was looking for since his eyes narrowed and the corners of his mouth turned down in a look that clearly said, are you kidding me?

"Do you think I couldn't do better than that?" Sasuke muttered under his breath and Sakura laughed.

"You can't tell me that you haven't thought about it though, right?" she teased. "I mean, Sai is pretty cute."

Sasuke scoffed lightly. "If aloof book nerd is your type, then sure."

"Hey, being a book nerd isn't a bad thing, jerk," she shot back as she reached over and gave him a playful shrug.

Sasuke waved her away with an eye roll and a sarcastic, "Yeah, yeah," before reaching between them to tear off a piece of her forgotten sandwich to pop in his mouth. Effectively ending that conversation.

"Well, I didn't really think it was any of them anyway," she said, forging ahead like she hadn't noticed his casual brush off. "After all, that would have made me a terrible friend, if it had been right under my nose the whole time and I just totally missed it. So, no, I'm thinking that Mystery Man is someone I don't know as well. But I do still know him, don't I?"

Sasuke's eyebrow twitched just a little and his eyes skated so briefly to the side as he grabbed for another piece of her sandwich that she almost didn't notice the movement at all. But she did notice. And she smiled inwardly to herself.

She was on the right track.

"Okay, so I do know them. Still, that doesn't really narrow it down much, does it?" she asked, more to herself. "So I've gotta think, what's your type? If I had to guess, then I'd probably say…smart, because you can't stand having conversations with people who don't know what they're talking about. Kind, but someone who's still able to joke around with you without getting hurt by it since you're a sarcastic bitch—"

"Gee, I wonder where I get that from," Sasuke joked, giving her a pointed look as he took another piece of her sandwich.

His comment made her grin and she gave a little bow.

"Anyway, he'd have to be pretty caring and sensitive, too. Which successfully knocks out about half of the guys here at school, soooo…" she trailed off and tapped her index finger to her chin as she considered the possibilities.

When she started talking again, her voice was lower, almost a mumble as she ran through the list in her mind aloud, "So, I'm thinking that maybe it's someone who already graduated? Maybe last year, so it could be, like, I dunno, Shikamaru or someone?" She tilted her head to the side like she was weighing the option. But ultimately, she shook her head. "Definitely smart enough, but after that stunt he pulled a couple of years ago, I doubt it. So, no, I'm thinking someone else, maybe someone even older—"

From the corner of her eye, she saw Sasuke pause around the bite he'd been chewing and look at her. It was only a brief glance, the involuntary kind that you make when someone says something that hits a little too close to home and one that she wouldn't have caught if she hadn't been paying attention.

But she was and when she realized just what that meant, Sakura put her hand to her mouth to stop a ridiculous noise from slipping out.

"It is, isn't it?" she whispered from behind her fingers.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Sasuke said quickly once he'd swallowed.

It wasn't remotely convincing and she didn't even bother to feign believing him because this was news. Big news! And she needed Sasuke to tell her everything.

"Oh my god, who is it?" she questioned, quiet but excited.

"It's no one," Sasuke hissed. "So will you please just drop it?"

It was too late for that though. And a whole new round of questions started pouring out of her one after another, faster than she was even giving Sasuke time to react to.

"Is it that guy who works at the movies? You know, the one with the—" she gestured to her hair.

"Sakura—"

"No, that doesn't make sense; I don't think you've ever looked at him twice. Okay, okay, is it one of the village guards?"

"Sakura, stop—" he tried again.

But again, she ignored him.

"No, no, that wouldn't really work…" she mumbled under her breath. Then she snapped her fingers and looked at him with wide eyes, "What about that guy at the cat shelter you visit sometimes? He's cute and he likes cats, so that's a win-win, ri—"

"Sakura!" Sasuke exclaimed loudly. The force behind his words made her rock back a bit in shock but she quieted and looked at him. "Just…stop already, okay?"

His cheeks were flushed and his chest was heaving just the slightest bit, enough to tell her that she'd messed up, that she'd pushed him too much. The way she had a tendency to do to anyone when she got excited about something and wanted to learn more.

And Sasuke understood that because Sasuke understood her, but now that she was sitting next to him, watching the color rise higher and higher on his neck, she realized that she hadn't tried to understand him today.

No, instead she pushed and pushed, like always, until this moment came, where she felt ridiculous for harassing her friend — her best friend — over lunch about some guy that Sasuke clearly just wanted to try and forget about.

"Sasuke," she said softly, her shoulders slumping down. "I'm—"

"I said stop, Sakura," he interrupted. His voice was quiet now and small and she frowned when she recognized the way he was trying to close up on her and retreat into himself like he used to do when they were younger.

The sound of it made her sad.

"I know, Sasuke, but I—"

"I'm going inside," Sasuke interjected again. And as soon as the words were out of his mouth, Sasuke grabbed his bag and his water bottle and stood up.

He started walking away from her, heading across the lawn to the front door and Sakura knew that she should probably let him go. She'd done enough for today after all, bothered him enough and hurt him enough, but the last thing she wanted was for him to walk away from her angry.

So, Sakura got up. She left her things on the ground and jogged over to him, thankful that Sasuke didn't speed up to get away from her when he glanced over his shoulder and noticed she was coming. He did sigh though, and that made Sakura feel even worse than if he'd tried to run away.

"I'm sorry, Sasuke," she blurted out after darting in front of him. She was holding up her hands to stop him from moving any further. "You told me to stop and I should have, so I'm sorry. I crossed the line and pushed your boundaries, and that was unfair of me."

Sasuke let out a "hmph" and crossed his arms over his chest, which looked a little silly when he had a backpack in one hand and his water in the other, but Sakura decided it was better not to point that out. She was just happy that he wasn't making any attempt to leave again.

But since he was also refusing to look at her, Sakura figured that she still had plenty of apologizing left to do.

"I'm sorry," she said again. "I know that isn't enough, but what if I make it up to you by treating you to something to eat after school?"

"How's that making it up to me?" he asked, staring at some point in the yard behind her.

"Well, because I'll let you bitch as much as you want about Naruto," she said. Then she gave a little shrug and added, "And you can tell me what a horrible friend I am."

Sasuke's lips turned down in a frown.

"You're not a horrible friend," he said. "You're just a…stubborn ass sometimes."

That made Sakura tilt her head back and laugh a little, and she was happy to see that Sasuke's expression softened just a little bit.

"Okay, then you can tell me how much of a stubborn ass I am," she joked. But then she took a small step toward him and lowered her voice. "And look, I promise, no boy talk unless you want to talk about it, okay?"

Finally, Sasuke looked at her. His gaze was a little wary and he looked her over like he was searching for the lie in her words. But then he sighed.

"Fine. I'll meet you at the gate after school then, but—" he said sharply when she started to smile. "No boy talk."

"I promise," she repeated with her hand raised in the air like she was swearing a solemn oath just as the bell rang, declaring lunch over.

XxX

Throughout the rest of the day, Sakura was a little more subdued but, try as she might to drop the subject completely like she'd promised Sasuke, she still found herself eyeing guys during the rest of her classes.

It wasn't like she meant to. Honestly! But once a puzzle was put in front of her, it was hard to stop, even when she knew that she needed to.

It's an older guy, though… she reminded herself for the fourth time even as she glanced over at a small group of guys who were talking to one another in the corner of the classroom. So it wouldn't be anyone here, but…who then?

She tapped the end of her pen against her chin as she considered the possibilities. Both trying to remember the ways Sasuke had reacted to her questions before he'd gotten angry at her and trying to push down the guilt she felt for continuing to pursue the subject. Before she could ponder the thought very long though, the last bell of the day rang and snapped her from her thoughts.

She quickly packed away the notebook that she'd sat on her desk earlier and tucked her pen behind her ear before grabbing her bag and standing up, just as someone called her name.

"Sakura?"

She looked up and saw Itachi look at her from behind his desk. The expression on his face was serious, the same way he'd looked all during class, but there was something a little different now. Something she couldn't quite put her finger on as she walked over and stopped in front of his desk while the rest of the class filed out, barely giving her a glance.

"Yes, Itachi-sensei?" she asked.

"Do you have a few moments?" Itachi asked. "I have something I'd like to talk with you about, if you have the time."

"Sure, of course…" she said slowly, uncertainly. "I'm…not in any trouble, am I?"

"Not at all," Itachi replied with a little smile and a shake of his head. A soft sigh of relief made her shoulders sag, but then Itachi's serious expression returned and he continued, "I'd actually like to talk with you about Sasuke."

"Sasuke…?"

Itachi nodded but he didn't elaborate. He stood up from his chair and walked over to the door, checked the room with a quick glance to make sure it was empty and shut the door. Then he turned back to face her.

"I'm worried that something's…wrong, you see?" he finally said. Seeming to choose the word very carefully.

"Oh?"

"Yes. He hasn't been returning my calls or text messages, which is strange. So, I thought that—"

"That I might know something," she said, finishing his thought. Itachi nodded.

"He was supposed to be staying with me over the weekend, but I stopped hearing from him a little while after I dropped him off at your house on Saturday," he explained. "Then he never came back. He just went back to our parents' house without a word. So, I was just curious if something had happened while Sasuke was there with you? Something that made him upset?"

"I…" Sakura paused.

So much had happened between what she'd witnessed firsthand and what Sasuke had told her after the fact. But she wasn't sure what she could say to Itachi. Heck, she didn't even know if she should say anything at all. After all, was it her place to tell Itachi about the ultimatum Sasuke had faced and the decision he'd been forced to make if Sasuke clearly didn't feel comfortable doing it himself?

She didn't think so. So she took a deep breath and gave Itachi an apologetic look.

"I'm sorry," she said softly. "But I don't think it's my place to say."

Itachi nodded slowly, like he was trying to come to terms with exactly what those words meant. Then he let out a little noise from deep in his throat and nodded again, more firmly.

"Well, thank you anyway."

"Of course."

Sakura waited for a beat after that, unsure if Itachi was going to ask her anything else. But he seemed to be caught up in his own thoughts, so she turned and headed to leave.

"Sakura?" he called out to her when she was only a couple of steps from the door. She turned to look back at him.

"Yes, Itachi-sensei?"

His gaze was trained on the floor, stony and unreadable but his voice when he spoke again was soft. Sad, she thought.

"Sasuke…" he started uncertainly. "Is he… He is okay, isn't he?"

Sakura looked down at her shoes and thought about that. About how he'd seemed on their way to school, distraught and melancholic over what he'd done. Then she thought about their lunch and how she'd still managed to get him to joke with her despite his sadness and his anger, at her, at Naruto, and at himself. She thought about how deeply her friend was hurting, probably more than she could hope to understand right now.

But then she thought about just how strong and resilient Sasuke was and looked back up at Itachi.

"I think so," she answered. Then she gave a little shrug. "At least, I think he will be."

Itachi nodded to himself.

"Thank you," he said.

Sakura inclined her head, again waiting to see if he might stop her and ask anything else. He didn't and when he turned his back on her and rounded his desk, she turned and headed out the door.

As she closed it behind her, she glanced at Itachi one last time through the shrinking crack and frowned when she saw him hunched over his desk. His phone was in one hand and there was an expression on his face that she'd never seen on him before.

Anguish.

Curious (and a little worried), she watched him for a moment longer as he moved to do something on his phone. But just as he reached toward the screen with his free hand, it stopped short, hesitating as it hovered in the air, before Itachi sighed and pulled his hand back. Then he put his phone down and put his head in his hands, muttering something Sakura couldn't quite make out as she pushed the door the rest of the way closed silently. She had intruded on him long enough.

As she walked away though, the image of Itachi's face, pained and saddened, stayed burned in her mind.

Something about it, about the way he had looked, triggered a response in her. A deep tingle of recognition that then turned to an even deeper feeling of unrest as she realized she was missing…missing something. Something that was right there in front of her.

Because she'd seen that look before, that utter heartbreak that seemed to shake someone down to their soul. She just… Damn! She just couldn't remember where she'd seen it.

Until she stepped outside.

And, at first, she didn't believe it. Actually, no. At first, she wanted to laugh. Laugh because she didn't believe. Because it was ridiculous. Because this, this couldn't have been the answer.

But there it was, in front of her, as plain as the look that was so obvious on Sasuke's face as he stood by the front gate, waiting for her just like he'd promised. A look that she remembered from the morning when he'd been walking at her side. One of desperation, of torment, of a bone-chilling sadness.

The same look that she'd just seen a perfect mirror image of on Itachi's face not even a handful of minutes ago.

A look that she'd been searching for on someone's face all day as a way to tell her who Sasuke was so broken-hearted over.

Now, all she wanted to know was why.