Sharon rolled over. Again. And tried to reach out and check her phone without disrupting the sleeping blonde. Brenda sighed with a huff and rolled onto her back, her arms hitting the comforter a little harder than necessary as she turned her head toward the back of the woman next to her.
"Maybe I should just go," Brenda said in a low, tired voice. She watched the muscles in Sharon's back and shoulders tense, heard the sharp intake of breath, unsure whether it was in response to her words or just the fact that she'd finally broken the painfully stretching silence of the bedroom.
She cleared her throat and continued, "...if having me here in your bed with you is making you so uncomfortable then maybe it's better—"
Suddenly Sharon's hand was on Brenda's wrist, pinning her arm to the comforter and effectively stopping the blonde from sitting up to leave the bed. Brenda wondered when she had even rolled over, but wide green eyes were boring into her, filled with panic and confusion.
"What?! Brenda, no," she ran a hand through her tangled waves and her grip tightened on the younger woman's wrist as her tired brain tried to catch up with what was happening.
Brenda averted her eyes and looked up at the ceiling, unable to handle the intensity of Sharon's gaze. "You've been tossing and turning and sighing for hours and you keep checking your phone. If you wanted me to leave, you could have just said so," she said, pulling her hand out of the brunette's grip and crossing her arms protectively over her chest.
"Oh my God, Brenda, no. No," she said more forcefully, sitting up fully to try and make eye contact with the blonde, not caring that the movement left her naked body completely exposed to the waist. "I don't want you to go anywhere," she said, reaching for Brenda's hand, "I like you right where you are. Please don't go," she added, squeezing her hand for emphasis. "Why don't I make us some coffee?"
Brenda looked at her, hard, for what felt like an eternity, searching her face for something, before finally conceding, "Alright."
Sharon slid herself to the edge of the bed and stood up, turning back around to face Brenda again as she donned her robe. "Don't get up. Stay. Please. I'll be back in a minute," she said before slipping out of the room and down the hall toward the kitchen.
Brenda did get up to use the bathroom and splash some water on her face, but climbed back into bed to wait for Sharon. She glanced over at Sharon's phone sitting on the nightstand, still plugged in. She had no idea what was going on with the other woman. Sharon was so hard to read and it seemed like every time she tried recently, she got it wrong. That woman was just so frustrating sometimes it made her want to scream.
Sharon walked back into the room holding two steaming mugs, her hair all flipped to one side, standing up in odd places due to the unruly waves. With her messy hair and the shadows of yesterday's makeup that hadn't quite been fully removed, Sharon looked beautiful. Brenda loved seeing her like this. But she could also see Sharon's brow was slightly furrowed, her smile a little bit forced. She handed a mug off to Brenda and set her own down on the coaster next to her phone as she slid back into bed.
She picked her mug up again and inhaled deeply, looking down into the steaming liquid.
"I'm sorry if I did something to give you the impression that I didn't want you here," she began, "or that I'm not happy with…how things are going between us," her eyes found and held Brenda's, underscoring her words.
"This is all still…new…for me, but I'm—Brenda, I didn't even know sex could be like this until I met you," she sighed, running a hand through her hair again, messing it up even further. "But it's not just about the sex," she smiled, her eyes sparkling. Brenda couldn't help but smile back at her, taking another sip of her coffee as she listened to what the other woman had to say.
"It's like I've spent my whole life with something missing and I didn't even know it. A hollow place I didn't realize was empty, that I can only recognize now that it's filled in. Things are finally starting to make sense." She shook her head, "I don't know how to describe it, but I finally feel like I've expanded into my whole self, like I'm living my life more fully now, and you've helped me grow into that."
She reached for Brenda's hand again and squeezed, "I'm not uncomfortable with you in my bed, Brenda. I'm more comfortable with you than I've ever been with anyone—inside or outside of the bedroom. And I certainly don't want you to leave."
Sharon held Brenda's gaze unwaveringly until the blonde nodded and said, "Ok. So, what is it, then?"
Sharon sighed, "I'm worried about Gavin."
"You're worried about Gavin? That's what this is about?!"
"He threw us out of his house, Brenda, and now he's ignoring me…"
Brenda looked over, squinting to read the clock, "What time is it? He was drunk as a skunk when we left and that was early. At the rate he was going, he's probably still sleeping it off. Or he's being his usual overly-dramatic self," Sharon rolled her eyes in agreement.
"And," Brenda continued, "speaking as someone who throws a mean pity party, let him wallow for a little while. Once he has some time to sober up and realize it was his own darn fault, he'll come around," she reached over and put a hand on Sharon's robe-clad knee, squeezing gently.
Sharon hummed as she swallowed another sip of her coffee, thinking back to the previous evening.
. . .
They were buzzed in at the gate and had to park a fair distance away due to all the cars. They could hear music as they got closer to the house and the front door was unlocked. Sharon braced herself, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly before they ventured inside.
They didn't get far before a very attractive young man wearing a police uniform—of sorts—approached them. It was definitely not regulation, the top opened in a wide V exposing his smooth, muscled chest. Fuzzy handcuffs and a "baton" hung from his belt, reaching past the bottom of his very short, very tight shorts.
"Hi, I'm Kyle," he greeted them, offering his hand to Sharon.
Sharon took his hand, and choked out a, "Hi," before a bewildered look crossed her face. She stood there, staring and continuing to shake his hand, her whole upper body rigid, and then she began to pivot awkwardly from Kyle to Brenda and back, no further sound coming out of her mouth. Her eyes conveyed more panic now that bewilderment and Brenda jumped in, putting one hand on Sharon's elbow and the other on his forearm as she spoke.
"Kyle, is it?" she asked, her accent thicker than usual as she turned on her best southern charm, "Would you please excuse us for just one tiny little second? We'll be back in two shakes," she added with what she hoped was a reassuring smile. "Excuse us."
Still holding on to Sharon's elbow, she turned them both around and practically dragged the older women toward a nearby hallway in search of a space that would provide them some semblance of privacy.
She paused at the doorway to a guest room until her eyes landed on a couple making out rather...vigorously. She turned and walked them further down the hall past a couple of closed doors and into what looked like Gavin's bedroom. Once the door was firmly closed behind them she turned around to look at Sharon.
"Are you ok? What just happened out there? You said you were fine with coming tonight, but you froze and then started doing that awkward pivot thingy you do when you're trying not to freak out."
"What?! What awkward—" Sharon shook her head, "Nevermind. What are we doing here, Brenda?"
"...What are we doing? Sharon, we're at a party. At Gavin's house. Celebrating your least favorite holiday of all time," Brenda said, growing more concerned even as an edge of exasperation started to creep into her voice.
"Yes, I know that, but what are we doing, Brenda?" she asked again, gesturing with one arm between the two of them, "What—I didn't—I don't even know what to call you."
"My name is Brenda, Sharon. I thought you were doing pretty well with that lately instead of the whole 'Chief' thing."
"Brenda!" Sharon pinched the bridge of her nose and took a breath, "I mean, how am I supposed to introduce you? We haven't talked about anything beyond…exploring. And that's all well and good when it's just us, but…I didn't realize until we were standing there with—what was his name? Kyle?—that I don't know how to introduce you. This is the first time it's come up. I was so focused on Gavin pressuring me and the costumes that it didn't occur to me that we would be out in public together in a way where people might expect some type of…label or context for who we are to one another…"
Oh. That made sense. They hadn't talked about it and that had been working just fine for her up til now. But now Sharon was freaking out and she had to do something or this was going to blow up. This is why she was fine not seeing anyone. Talking—well, not talking—about feelings and stuff had been a major issue in her past relationships. She liked Sharon. A lot. So she was just going to have to try and hope she didn't stick her foot in her mouth too badly. Shoot!
"You're right, we haven't talked about it. I don't know what to call it, Sharon. I don't know what you want or what you're comfortable with. But whose business is it, anyway, other than ours? If we don't have an answer tonight, then why do we have to say anything?" She grabbed Sharon's hand and tried to read her expression, but she was back in control of her features now, so it was hard to tell what she was thinking.
"We can talk about it more later, but just 'Brenda' will be fine for now. Tonight we're 'Brenda' and 'Sharon.' Let them draw their own conclusions."
"…is that what you want?" Sharon asked, tentatively, "Because you're not just Brenda. We're more than just friends. But…can we even call it dating if we don't actually go out on dates?"
"I'm not saying we're only friends, Sharon. I'm just saying that maybe trying to figure all of this out while hiding in Gavin's bedroom dressed up as one another in the middle of a party on your least favorite holiday might not be the best time to be having this particular conversation. So for right now, maybe we can just be 'Brenda' and 'Sharon' and we can talk about the rest of it another time."
"Right. Yes. Ok. Later. Ok," Sharon said, nodding to herself a little distractedly as they moved toward the door and the party that awaited them. They found Kyle again easily enough and finished their introductions as he handed them each a beverage.
They were talking with a group of people dressed as boy and girl scouts a little while later when Gavin emerged from the kitchen, a fresh drink in hand. His eye caught the two women standing in a group with his boyfriend, their backs to him, neither of them wearing any kind of costume at all as far as he could tell. He sauntered over and wrapped an arm around Sharon's shoulder, whispering drunkenly in her ear, "Sharon Raydor, you naughty little bitch, I can't believe you had the nerve to show up here dressed like tha—"
Brenda had frozen for a second at the surprise contact and the sound of Gavin's voice so close in her ear, but she turned, then, and looked up at him, brown eyes sparkling and her wide lips smirking at the look of shock and horror on his face. He let out a high-pitched shriek, jumping back slightly, some of his beverage sloshing unnoticed onto the carpet.
"Hi Gavin, Sharon and I decided to dress up in each others' work uniforms," Brenda explained, glancing toward a blonde woman in a floral print dress who was still engaged in conversation with one of the girl scouts. He looked from Brenda to the blonde and back again, his alcohol-slowed brain trying to process what his eyes were seeing.
As if feeling their attention on her, Sharon chose that moment to turn around and her eyes met Brenda's before moving to Gavin's shocked face. She raised her hand and gave him a small wave as she said, "Happy Halloween, Gavin," before shrugging one shoulder and taking a sip of her drink.
"OH MY GOD!" Gavin shrieked again, dropping his drink as his brain finally caught up. The heavy glass hit the edge of the coffee table, spraying cranberry pomegranate sangria across the area rug and the side of his new sectional before hitting the floor with a thud.
He turned and gasped, sucking most of the air out of the room with him as he saw the dark red liquid soaking into the sectional and the carpet.
"NOOO!" he wailed, "No no no no NO!" he slowly sank to the floor, his hand pressed firmly against the exposed skin of his chest beneath his open pilot's uniform. His breathing was shallow and quick, and tears were already starting to fall down his cheeks.
"I just got this," he said, wiping at his tears, "It almost didn't come in time for the party, I didn't have a chance to get it treated yet," his words ran together, a combination of alcohol and the panic that was starting to set in. "Oh my GOD! KYLE!" he sobbed. Gavin was definitely way more drunk than they'd thought.
Kyle ran back over, hands full of paper towels, and started trying to sop up what he could of the dark red liquid. Gavin stared at the pile of stained paper towels, his face contorting into a grimace as he let out another wail.
"Oh, Gavin, honey. Here, let us help," Sharon stepped forward to help, but Gavin stopped her. "NO!" he shouted, extending his arm to push her away, "No. This is all your fault!"
"What?! Gavin!" Sharon tried to reach out and touch her friend's shoulder, but he clumsily swatted her hand away.
"No, get out! I don't want you here. I can't even look at you! GET OUT! Both of you!" he screamed, his face and eyes an angry red.
Kyle left the scouts in charge of Gavin and walked the two confused women to the door, a wad of sangria-soaked paper towels grasped in one hand.
"Sorry, I've been trying to give him water, but I think he started pre-gaming before I even got here to help set up and he's refilled the pumpkin bowl of sangria at least twice already…" he said apologetically, "It was nice to finally meet you, he talks a lot about you."
Sharon gave Kyle a sad smile and looked back to see Gavin curled up in a ball on the carpet, sobbing loudly. "You, too, Kyle. Good luck," she nodded in Gavin's direction and then turned back to Brenda, grabbing her hand and stepping out the front door.
The drive back to Sharon's condo was spent in silence. When they got out of the car, Sharon slammed her door, muttering, "I hate Halloween," under her breath. Brenda shot her a look, but said nothing.
"This is precisely the type of thing I hate about this ridiculous holiday and why I didn't want to go to Gavin's stupid party in the first place," she sighed, crossing her arms as they walked toward the elevator, her kitten heels managing to sound just as angry on the pavement as her customary stilettos.
"Well, I thought our costumes were pretty good," Brenda said, bumping her arm as they stood next to each other in the elevator, "Did you hear his shriek?!" Sharon cracked just the hint of a smile in response.
They entered the condo and Sharon closed and locked the door behind them. As they slipped off their shoes, Sharon turned to Brenda with a heavy sigh.
"Why don't you go get changed and I'll open a bottle of wine," Brenda suggested, rubbing the older woman's arm and leaning in to give her a quick kiss. "I have some ideas about how we might improve your opinion of this holiday," she added, biting her lip. Sharon smirked and raised an eyebrow at the younger woman before turning and heading down the hallway, adding a little extra swing to her hips when she felt Brenda's eyes following her.