Alrighty! I've never written a Fanfiction before and I literally started writing this the day I uploaded it, so it might be kind of trashy. I don't know if I'm going to continue this story or not, since A, my commitment is trash, B, I'm already writing another story which I plan to get to over 50 000 words in under 6 months (yikes), and C, I just overall suck at writing long stories.

So this is just the Prologue, and yeah it's another cliche 'shinigami go to hogwarts' story but those fanfictions always make me laugh and I need more of it, so I'm writing some. The Timeline for Bleach is after the Soul Society Arc, before Ichigo is approached by the Vizards to get help with his inner hollow. Timeline for Harry Potter is 5th year (because shinigami vs Umbridge is glorious). Anyways, leave a review if you want to and enjoy!

By the way, I'm Australian and as such I might accidentally use some Aussie terminology in the story which will make the characters seem out of character - which they probably will be anyway - so I apologise for that.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Bleach, they belong to J.K Rowling and Tite Kubo respectively.

It had been a completely normal day for one Ichigo Kurosaki. Going to school, dealing with Keigo's antics, saying hi to his friends, the usual. He went through the day with no 'trips to the bathroom' so he could deal with a hollow, and it was overall pretty boring. He got home, dodged an attack from his deranged father, went up to his room, and was about to start his homework when it all started getting weird.

Rukia had jumped into his room – literally, she jumped through the window – and told him the Soul Society had a mission for him. Seriously?! He wasn't even a proper shinigami, he was a substitute! But, begrudgingly, he exited his body and left Kon in charge before going back to the Soul Society with Rukia. And of course the damned midget wouldn't explain what this 'mission' was all about. So they walked in an awkward silence even as they arrived in the Soul Society, where they then went to the Squad 1 barracks.

When they got there, they entered the room where the captains meetings were held, and now here he was, standing awkwardly at the end of the room and not knowing what the hell was going on.

Then the old man – Yamamoto, if he remembered correctly – banged his cane on the floor, breaking him out of his thoughts.

"Now, I will explain why you are all gathered here on such short notice," Yamamoto declared in a booming voice.

Ichigo winced at the volume of his voice. Did he have to be so loud? It's not like anyone there was deaf.

"The existence of a race of humans who call themselves wizards has come into my attention recently, and upon further investigation done by the Onmitsukidō, we have discovered that they are also spiritually aware and channel spirit energy through sticks of wood they call wands," the head captain continued, spurring a round of bewildered whispers from all in the room but the man himself, Soi Fon, and Mayuri Kurotsuchi.

Okay, what the hell, Ichigo mentally deadpanned, completely confused. Wizards? This has gotta be a joke, right? And what does this have to do with me anyway? Why am I here?

Who knows. You could just ask one of them, the oh-so-helpful voice of his inner hollow piped in, startling the substitute Shinigami.

Go away! I don't need your input.

Well that's mean. Fine, I never wanted to talk to you anyway.

Ichigo let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. He was seriously going to have to get that thing out of his head, and soon.

Yamamoto continued with his explanation. "What this has to do with all of you, is that myself and Captain Fon have decided to send a team to a school for learning magic in Scotland to gather intel and hopefully form an alliance with these so-called wizards. Of course the students at this school are teenagers, so the people going will have to appear the age of a teenager. This is why the substitute Shinigami has been brought here."

Upon hearing a reference to himself, Ichigo blinked and then stared at Yamamoto. "So… lemme get this straight. Wizards and magic exist, and you're sending people to a school for magic of all things, so we can learn about it and make sure these wizards don't end up being enemies? Is that right?" He surmised, his typical scowl deepening at the implications of this.

Yamamoto nodded. "That is correct."

"And exactly how long would this go for?"

"Depending on the circumstances, from a year to over 3 years."

I really hope I can just leave and not have to do this stupid mission. And if I can't, I'D BETTER BE GETTING PAID FOR THIS! Ichigo thought, his scowl deepening.

Shunsui then spoke up. "Old Man Yama, who are you planning on sending on this mission?"

"I plan on sending substitute shinigami Ichigo Kurosaki, Rukia Kuchiki of Squad 13, Captain Tōshirō Hitsugaya of Squad 10, and Lieutenant Renji Abarai of Squad 6," Yamamoto responded with a firm tone.

There went Ichigo's plans of getting out of this situation.

Tōshirō nodded and stepped forward to speak. "Head Captain, when will we be leaving for this mission?"

"Well, first you must catch up on any information you must know to be able to not seem suspicious at the school you will be going to – which is Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry," Yamamoto responded.

Who the hell names a school Hogwarts? Ichigo's inner hollow questioned with a scoff. Ichigo couldn't help but agree.

"And after that, you will leave for London to stay at a motel, buy your equipment, and on the first of September catch the same train that all other students take to get to the school," Yamamoto finished.

"Thank you for the information, Head Captain," Tōshirō said, bowing and stepping back into place.

Ichigo mentally face-palmed. "This is going to be hell, isn't it?" He mumbled in despair.

Right you are, King.