And I'm looking down and my heart's connected

I'm feeling love from a different view

We learn the most when we least expect it

We learn the most when we break in two

May 2, 1998

Hermione Granger knew she wasn't in love with Ronald Weasley, though she did know that at one point she had been well on the way. She wasn't even certain when the process had stalled and indeed reversed course but she did know that by the time of the final battle at Hogwarts, they were friends and that was all they'd ever be.

That was why when he grabbed her hand and started explaining that they needed to get to the Chamber of Secrets, it was all too easy to pull her hand free and shake him off. "No, take Ginny! One of us needs to stay with Harry and he'll be able to concentrate better if he thinks she's safe."

He couldn't deny the logic and with a determined look he grabbed his baby sister's hand and started moving rapidly through the crowd for the door. She struggled briefly but Ron must've explained because within seconds Ginny was the one pulling him to the door instead. Hermione watched them go, trying to decide if she should wait for Harry to return with Luna or go find him herself; it'd be just like him to get sidetracked or attacked when she wasn't around to help (not that he often needed her help in life or death situations, she bemusedly told herself, he was uncannily able to extricate himself).

She didn't get a chance to decide because in that moment the Weasley twins grabbed her hands and one of them (George by the singular ear-ness of him) was hugging her and she knew the other was just waiting for their turn. "Are you okay? We heard about Malfoy Manor."

George had barely backed off before Fred wrapped his own long arms around her, hugging her so fiercely that he'd lifted her and she had to stiffen her legs or risk kicking him in the shin. "I'm okay, mostly," she reassured, patting Fred's shoulders in comfort until he put her down. "Getting tortured wasn't on my spring to-do list but I'm adaptable."

"Did you just make a joke?" George asked with a grin, though she could see he was still concerned. She didn't blame him, she knew she must look a fright. Her hair was frizzy with magic and stress, she could practically hear the static electricity crackling as she moved. She'd lost weight she couldn't afford to lose while on the run, not just from a lack of food, but that damned locket had haunted her in ways she really hadn't been prepared for. The Cruciatus curse had only made it worse and nowadays she could barely countenance eating, no matter how much Fleur pressured her.

"If I don't laugh I'll cry, and there's no time," Hermione admitted, trying to pull her hands away so she could go find Harry, only to have the conversation interrupted again when Percy stumbled his way through the secret passage.

"Am I too late? Has it started?"

She'd lost Harry somewhere between Aberforth and Hagrid when he'd been heading up the stairs. She was creeping down a seemingly empty corridor, planning to head for Ravenclaw tower when she heard a soft scrape on the rough rock of the floor just around the corner.

Hermione froze and for precious seconds she was back on the floor of Malfoy Manor, with pain so thick that it felt like fire under her skin, and she couldn't breathe, she was blind with terror and agony-

But she was standing in the hallway of Hogwarts and there was someone approaching.

She gripped her wand in sweaty fingers and pointed it towards the shadowy corner and waited, her tongue glued to the top of her mouth. She wasn't even certain she'd be able to spit out an incantation with the state she was in, but she was Hermione bloody Granger, the brightest witch of their age, and she was not going to let Harry and Ron down, she was not going to let her parents' sacrifice mean nothing; she was going to help save the Wizarding World if it was the last thing she did.

Theodore Nott walked casually around the corner, spinning his wand in his fingers as if this were any other school day.

"You're not supposed to be here," Hermione declared, not lowering her wand because despite his neutrality during their school years, he was a Slytherin and as they'd demonstrated earlier they could not be trusted.

"Have you seen my father?"

"Have the Death Eaters taken their masks off then?" She asked snidely, adjusting her grip on her wand so it felt more firmly in her control. "Are you here to join daddy then? Kill and torture muggleborns? Your classmates?"

Theo stared at her calmly, his face a study of placidity. He had his wand in hand but didn't raise it. "I"m here to kill my father, Granger. And then I'll be gone and neither you nor your precious Order will need to worry about Notts ever again."

Shock alone had her lowering her wand, staring at him incredulously.

Unfortunately it made sense. Theo had always been an outlier in Slytherin house and in Hogwarts in general. He'd been studious and quiet, not engaged with any cliques and seemingly content to do his own thing. They'd often studied not far apart in the library and as such…she'd seen how he flinched sometimes at unexpected noises, how he often read parchment letters with a pursed mouth and sad eyes.

She knew how cruel Death Eaters could be.

"You can't kill your father, Theo, no matter how much he's hurt you. Let justice happen, he'll spend his life in Azkaban."

He was already shaking his head. "I will do what I came here to do," he turned and started to walk away. "I assume he's not that way since your head is still attached to your body. Stay out of my way, Granger."

She followed behind him not for caution but because they were both heading the same way, back towards the Great Hall. They'd not gone more than 500 feet when the vibrant orange of a dark curse sliced between them, leaving a sizzling burn on the wall and sending them jumping further apart. From the corridor across, a black robed figure emerged with a maniacal grin and madness in his eyes.

"Cavorting with mudbloods, Theodore," Cassius Nott sneered, flicking his wand and sending another fiery curse flicking at them; Theo shifted an inch to avoid it, Hermione rolled herself across the floor and nearly out of sight. "I had hoped you could sink no lower, but you continue to disappoint." Nott Senior shifted to face his son straight on, clearly dismissing the threat of Hermione as beneath his notice and she was immediately offended to be considered so inconsequential.

"I think it's time to discard you and try again, I think with better maternal stock," Theo's father declared, "the results should improve."

They battled in a hallway too narrow for good maneuvering and Hermione watched with horror as the two men landed heavy blows, blood splattering the walls but wounds cauterized almost instantly by the ignis curse that they dueled with. Neither wizard bothered with shield charms, they were so intent on doing as much damage to each other as possible in a short time. By the time Hermione staggered to her feet, they'd each cast a handful of curses and were circling each other in a widening cycle that brought Theo within her reach, luckily so because his father had reached the end of his patience.

"Avada Kedavra!"

"Defendat Nos!"

The shield she cast slammed into existence between them and the Death Eater, shining moon bright white under the green beam of killing magic. It wouldn't hold, it couldn't, not against the killing curse. Nott held the spell, pumping power into it and stepping closer as he pushed at them and Hermione was horrified to see the shield begin to crack. Behind him two more Death Eaters appeared, skidding to a stop at the scene with looks of glee.

It felt like this was it.

It felt like any second now the shield would fail and she would be dead.

Theo shifted behind her and placed his hands on her shoulders, muttering under his breath, iungere magicae, an incantation she had never heard of before but the effect was immediate. Her power surged and the shield solidified and with only a thought of making the trio of Death Eaters back off, it flew forward and with a very physical thunk sent the three men flying towards the corridor wall where they hit with a sickening crunch and didn't rise again. The shield dissipated when it hit the wall, leaving three crumpled figures and a slowly growing puddle of blood.

"Oh," Hermione gasped, sinking to her knees as her energy flagged and she stared at what she'd done. "What happened? I didn't mean to-"

"Protection spells aren't always defensive, Granger," Theo explained, staring at his father's corpse with unseeing eyes. "You asked for protection, the magic did as instructed."

"What was that charm? I thought for sure we were going to die," she admitted, shifting back so she could rest against the wall. Her hands were shaking and her head spinning, her body tingling and somehow hollow.

"It's a very old charm for lending magical strength to another," Theo explained, finally gathering himself and turning to look at his unexpected savior. He knelt in front of her, tilting her head up with surprisingly gentle fingers to look her in the eye and study her face. "It's not used very often because if used too much, it can have side effects." He flicked his wrist and muttered, "Magicae inspicere." Glowing numbers appeared on Hermione's collarbone and Theo shook his head as he read them, "You've almost completely depleted your magical core."

"What does that mean?" Hermione asked, really struggling to focus as waves of nausea threatened to overtake her. She probably would have thrown up but she hadn't eaten in almost a day so there was nothing to give.

"It means that if you continue to use magic, you're going to die. Wizards cannot live without magic."

"Oh, that's serious," she concluded, reaching into her pockets until she found the Pepper Up potion she'd stashed and almost forgotten about. Hermione tossed it back and finally found the energy to stand. "But I have to find Harry, there's no choice."

"Well I'm leaving," Theo announced, giving her a look that clearly said he thought she was stupid to head back into battle. "I've done what I came to do."

"Theo," she grabbed his arm, "you're a brilliant wizard, you should stay and help."

"I didn't come here to fight for any cause but my own," he denied, shaking off her hand. "I don't want to die, unlike you."

"It's in your better interest that we succeed," Hermione argued, "you've been seen fighting your father, a Death Eater. If Voldemort wins, they won't let you live, not thinking that you killed your father."

"I did kill my father," Theo swore, his face contorting with passion for the first time since they'd run into each other. "You were just the tool I used to do so." He grimaced and ran his hand over his face, turning his head to watch the fighting that continued to unfold on the lawns outside the windows. "I don't want to hurt anyone, I just wanted free of him."

"Then don't fight," Hermione offered, placing her hand on his shoulder so he'd look at her. "We could use healers as well."

He nodded and turned back to her. "Can you walk?"

"I think so, I just feel…weak, I guess?"

Slowly and unsure, he slid his arm around her waist and they started down the hall for the main entry to Hogwarts. Neither of them looked at the broken bodies lying by the wall as they walked past. Hermione wanted to regret taking their lives, however accidentally or inadvertently it had happened. She really did want to feel some kind of remorse.

She didn't.

They turned a corner and walked into another battle. Fred and Percy were dueling two men, one of them Minister Thicknesse. They were too far away to hear what the men were shouting at each other as they dueled back and forth but it took only seconds for the two brothers to have the Death Eaters incapacitated, one slowly transforming into some kind of spiked creature, the other laying stunned and unseeing at their feet. Fred was grinning at Percy, his eyes sliding and catching Hermione's as she and Theo crept closer, his grin fading as he saw the Slytherin with his arm around her. He leapt towards her, not noticing the glow of a spell slamming into the outer wall behind him but she did.

She didn't even think about it, her wand slid into her fingers and she was pointing it at the wall even as it exploded inward towards her friends and herself. "Remisit!"

It was a momentum reversal spell, the heavy centuries old stones that were heading for Fred and Percy froze and instead exploded outward, taking out the Death Eaters and giant on the lawn instead.

Hermione's heart stopped beating and she fell to her hands and knees. Her vision was fading, darkness creeping in as she struggled to breathe and she felt completely and utterly gone. She felt hands on her waist as they struggled to turn her over and then instead of the dirty floor she was looking at the dirty ceiling and Theo looked upset, like something was really wrong, but what could be wrong, she was just going to sleep for a while, for a long while…

"Iungere magicae."

Her heart jolted awake and she took a shaky breath. Then another. And again one more, and only then did her vision start to clear and now instead of a dirty ceiling she was looking into the dirty face of Fred Weasley and he was smiling down at her with her head cradled in his lap. Theo was holding her hands, she now recognized the tentative way he touched her, but Fred had fisted his hands in her hair so she could only see him.

"You've always been my favorite witch, Hermione," Fred admitted, leaning down and pressing an affectionate kiss against her lips and this time the lack of breathing had nothing to do with the all encompassing feeling of death she'd been dancing with for the last however long the battle had been going.

"Don't tell Ginny that," she instructed him, pulling at Theo's hands until he helped her sit up. She swallowed heavily and looked around just in time to see an acromantula crawl into the castle through the hole left in the castle wall. She screamed and Fred whirled towards the threat; he and Percy simultaneously shouting a spell towards the creature and sending it flying back into the darkness.

Theo was swearing now, reaching down and dragging her up and looking for somewhere to hide. They both knew without speaking that she could not perform magic anytime soon. Hermione may have doubted his original assertion but what she'd just gone through told her he hadn't lied. She knew that she'd been almost dead and if it hadn't been for Theo casting the iungere charm, she would have been.

Fred startled her by lifting her into his arms, gesturing with his head towards a tapestry just down the hall from them.

"There's more coming," Percy shouted from where he peered down from the opening, stumbling backwards towards them. "We need to go, can't blast all the bloody things away."

Hermione wrapped her arms around Fred's neck, pressing her face against his neck and watching over his shoulder as Theo and Percy ran to keep up with them, all four of them ducking behind the tapestry just in time as the thundering cacophony of spider legs chittering through the outer wall reached them and scuttled by. Fred leaned against the wall with a heavy sigh but didn't put her down and she was honestly thankful for it because she didn't know if her legs would hold.

"We have to keep moving," Percy scolded them, illuminating the staircase with his wand before heading downward. He wasn't wrong, they'd only made it a few steps when the tapestry was yanked aside and two Death Eaters appeared. Theo slid between them and the trio below, hissing an incantation, "Glisseo!" that turned the staircase into a slide and down they went, unfortunately the combatants came too. It was a direct main floor staircase, so it went down seven floors and the four of them slid so quickly that the Death Eaters had no chance of hitting them with a curse. Fred kept hold of Hermione as best he could and when they hurtled through the tapestry at the bottom, the two of them rolled together to a stop along the wall opposite and watched with stunned eyes as Percy cast Duro at the tapestry and turned it to stone.

All four of them winced at the meaty thuds that came seconds later and the small dribble of blood that leaked out from under the seam.

"This wasn't what I imagined for the first time we lay together," Fred joked, though Hermione could tell from the strain around his eyes and how tense his shoulders were that the humor was forced. She pressed against his chest until he was kneeling and she could slide herself out from under him and stand. She was still shaky and Theo instinctively reached out and grabbed her arms to help.

"Not what I had in mind for my first time under a man, either," she pointed out with a small smile, taking a bit of pleasure in the look of shock that danced across Fred's face before his smile became genuine. Before he could reply, Professor McGonagall came charging down the hall, commanding a fleet of galloping desks towards the sounds of battle that were even louder down here than they had been upstairs.

"Rookwood!" Percy shouted, noticing the dangerous Unmentionable chasing after several students that were clearly far too young to be here. Mindlessly he took off after them, brandishing his wand fearlessly, demonstrating not for the first time today Gryffindor courage.

"Go!" Hermione ordered Fred, she could tell he was torn between staying with her, she was obviously not in a position to defend herself, and protecting his brother's back. "I've got Theo, I'll be fine!"

He hesitated for several seconds and she thought he might actually disobey and stay, but Theo reached over and grasped her hand and started to pull her in the same direction as the Professor. Fred nodded and took off after his older brother, glancing back at her one more time before disappearing down a darkened corridor.

She and Theo crept towards the sound of the main hall, and what they found there was a scene from a hellscape. There were multiple duels happening and already the open floor was littered with the bodies of the fallen, some dead, some incapacitated, some Death Eaters, some students, some Order members. Fenrir Greyback was laughing hysterically as he jumped around the room, attacking prone figures until a harshly cast curse from none other than Ronald Weasley sent him flying across the room and into the wall, leaving the bleeding form of Lavender lying prone on the ground, bleeding more now than she had before.

For several seconds she, Ron, and Harry looked at each other across the room. She smiled at them with trembling lips before mouthing, "Go!" and gesturing for them to keep on.

"We must help," Hermione told Theo, pulling him towards Lavender and the others on the ground. "I know first aid, do you know healing spells?"

"Yes, I've studied some healing texts," he admitted as he stumbled along after her, their hands still clasped and neither seemingly able to let go just yet.

"Excellent," she announced, falling to her knees next to her former roommate. "This…this we can do." She let go of his hand reluctantly, and turned her head to gaze into his eyes. "Help me help them." He conjured bandages and summoned potions from the Hospital Wing, and together in the shadows of the battle, with the sound of screaming and dueling in the background, they saved lives.

We did it, we bashed them, wee Potter's the one,

And Voldy's gone moldy, so now let's have fun!

Peeves sang repeatedly as he floated through the halls, tipping a non-existent hat in the trio's direction as they made their way back down to the Great Hall, Harry's freshly repaired wand in his hand, the Elder Wand stashed in his pocket until it could be returned to Dumbledore's grave.

Hermione was still incredibly weak, running her hand along the wall to give her added stability as they walked. She didn't know how one was supposed to feel after fighting in a war, but something had changed inside of her. There was a pull in her navel, and she strongly felt that she was meant to be somewhere other than where she was.

Once they reached the main level, she turned to her friends and smiled tightly. Harry only had eyes for Ginny and he strode to where she sat with her mum so he could slide in next to her and she shifted without a word from her mother's shoulder to his. They looked good together, like two parts of a whole.

Ron shuffled his feet next to her, running his gaze over his family, pausing briefly at the bandages that wrapped around them all in various spots but unlike most families…his had made it out of the fight whole.

Hermione wasn't surprised when he kept scanning the crowds, looking for someone in particular. "She's in the hospital wing," Hermione offered, patting his shoulder soothingly. "Theo says she should be fine, Fenrir didn't get the chance to bite her thanks to you."

Ron was visibly relieved, though Hermione knew it was more that Lavender was going to be okay and not that she wasn't going to be a werewolf. Ron wouldn't have cared about that, he was a good man. "I'm just gonna pop off and go-"

"Yes, Ron, go. Check on her. Spend time with her," she admonished with a smile, pushing him towards the staircase that would take him there. "She needs you."

Then she was alone in the Great Hall, staring at her friends and her family and the students of her school as they all came together, exhausted but alive and grateful to finally be on the other side of this war.

There was a soft scrape on the floor behind her but this time Hermione didn't startle. She knew from the feeling in her chest who was approaching.

"I'm going to need you to explain in detail, or direct me to the book that is going to explain these side effects," Hermione demanded, turning to glare at Theo as he joined her.

He shrugged, shoving his hands into his pockets and there was a glint of humor in his dark eyes. "You're not going to like them," he admitted, "The good news is it should be temporary. It'll last…oh…I don't know, a year or so?"

Title is from Laura Doggett's "Beautiful Undone".