It was no relaxed dinner. There was tension in the air, one that caused Will to tap his foot against the floor the whole time. Onyx did not seem uncomfortable at all, shoving spoon after spoon in his mouth, his thoughts seeming to be miles away. Will didn't dare ask what he was thinking. He didn't dare to say anything at all, afraid he might say something which would turn the silence into something worse and bring out the hostility his mother had shown when she first met Onyx.

His glance shot at El, who was watching the older boy intently. Jonathan looked at his plate and was suspiciously silent. His mother seemed to pick up that he was feeling terribly embarrassed, as she forced a smile on her lips.

"So you are in your final year? Which university do you have set your eyes on?"

"Juilliard, the conservatory in New York seems like a good fit." Onyx's eyes briefly met Will's, who immediately started blushing. "Although that's a long way from here."

The thought that the boy would indeed go that far away gave him a nagging feeling in his stomach. It was typical of him though: finally finding a new friend and losing him at the end of the year. But that was still far away. He tried not to dwell on it too much.

"Oh, do you play an instrument?" For the first time, genuine interest colored his mother's voice.

Inside, Will cheered, happy that his mother had discovered something she liked about Onyx.

"Several."

"He composes really great pieces," Will said. Automatically, his thoughts returned to the time Onyx was playing the synthesizer and pulled Will onto his lap.

Onyx caught his gaze, almost as if catching that thought. It was as if a bouncing ball was going up and down inside his stomach.

"What kind of music is it?" The conversation also caught Jonathan's attention.

The ice seemed broken when Onyx started talking about his broad taste in music. A smile played around Will's lips that still hadn't faded when the table was cleared.

"Your brother has a guitar, right? Maybe I can play a bit while you draw, see what comes out."

Will hesitated. That seemed like a lot of fun, but he didn't think Jonathan liked letting someone else play his instrument. Still, he walked up the stairs to ask him. He wiped his clammy hands on his pants once he reached the top of the stairs and knocked on his door.

"Hey." Jonathan looked at him inquiringly. Not surprising of course; they had just spoken to each other.

"I uhm... Sometimes I draw... when Onyx plays music. It gives me a lot of inspiration. I was hoping... he asked... can he borrow your guitar?"

For the umpteenth time, his cheeks flushed. Jonathan had to see it because he chuckled softly. "Go ahead then. But if there's even a scratch on it..."

"He really knows how to handle instruments," Will said quickly. "He's... he's got a lot of experience."

"It's all right." Jonathan handed him his guitar and Will carefully set it down in his room. Then he went downstairs.

"We can borrow Jonathan's guitar," he told Onyx. The boy stood by the window and peered out, but as soon as he heard Will's voice he turned around and smiled.

"Nice."

They turned towards the stairs and almost reached them when his mother intercepted them. She looked slightly suspiciously between them.

"Leave the door open."

Confused, he looked at his mother. "But then you will be much more bothered by the noise."

"We'll survive that. The door will stay open."

"But why? With Mike and the others, we never have to, do we?"

"But Onyx is not one of the other boys."

Her voice sounded determined. With a sigh, he gave in, even though he didn't understand her. He liked it much better when the door was closed; he always closed the door.

Muttering to himself, Will headed upstairs, the creaking steps indicating that his friend was following. Once in his room, he felt a little embarrassed. It really did look like a boy's room, with posters and all sorts of minifigures. Onyx must believe it was childish.

"It's... it's still my stuff from Hawkins." Embarrassed, he slammed his gaze down. "From a few years ago."

Onyx looked around. "It looks cool."

Will turned red. "R-really?"

"Yeah. It shows what you like, what you love. It breathes you, instead of being a copy from a magazine."

Shyly, Will bit his lip. To distract himself, he gathered his drawing stuff. Meanwhile, Onyx hung the guitar around his neck.

After a moment's hesitation, Will took a seat behind his desk. He checked the sharpness of his pencils and put a blank sheet in front of him.

Onyx sat down on the edge of his bed and pulled the strings. Although he'd heard his brother play the instrument hundreds of times, it sounded very different now. A pleasant warmth settled inside him and seemed to relax all his muscles. Naturally, Will began to sketch, letting himself be carried along on the notes of the music.

He saw icy blue eyes and raven-black hair that contrasted with fair, pale skin. A smile that made his heart burn, fingers braiding through his hair. And lips that came closer, that...

With a jolt, he came to his senses. He shook off the magic and stared at his drawing. No fantasy monsters, no battlefield. Two boys facing each other, one of their hands intertwined, one taller than the other, their faces so close they were no longer just talking.

Oh no oh no oh no!

Onyx had stopped playing. Panic raced through Will. Quickly he crumpled the paper. Oh, please don't let him see it...

"What is it?"

"N-nothing. It-it just didn't go the way I wanted. That happens a lot."

Onyx stood up. "Artists are always too critical of their own work." He held out his hand.

Will clasped his hands around the paper and shook his head. "It's..."

Onyx stepped even closer. He put his hand over Will's and caught his gaze. "With me, you have nothing to be ashamed of."

Will felt his lower lip tremble. The panic only intensified. Yet Onyx's touch caused him to stiffen and he remained motionless as Onyx peeled off his fingers and removed the wad of paper from his hand.

Tears stung his eyes. No, please. He couldn't get the words past his lips. Embarrassment lashed out at him, despite what Onyx had just said. The paper rustled, and he heard his rushed breathing.

A jolt swept through him as Onyx placed his hand against his jaw and tilted his head up; just like in the drawing. Will's heart thumped so heavily that he believed his mother could hear it downstairs.

"Is that something you would like?"

His throat felt dry. He could only look into those mysterious pools of ice. Is that what he wanted? To kiss Onyx? To feel his fingers through his hair? "It's... it was not supposed to happen. Sorry." He staggered backward, but there was the wall. "I didn't mean to... it came naturally. Sorry. Please, don't get angry, I... I..."

"Angry? No, why would I?" His fingertips brushed Will's jaw. He thought his legs would give out. "I just want to know if you picked up on my desire... or if it's your own desire."

"Your-your desire?"

"I don't know," he admitted. "I think so. When I look at your drawing... it actually makes me want to kiss you." He averted his gaze. "Even though that feeling is unfamiliar to me."

Was this really happening? Was Onyx really telling him he wanted to kiss? And that he-that he had never wanted that from anyone else?

"Have you... have you never kissed?"

He lifted the corner of his mouth. "No. Humans never interest me that much. But you... you're different."

The fact that he said humans made him frown slightly. Yet, all his other words were much more overwhelming to dwell on that. Onyx wanted to kiss him. And he... did he want it to?

Deep down, he knew he really liked Onyx. Maybe he was even in love. Just like in the drawing, he grabbed Onyx's right hand, as a sign that he wanted it too.

The older boy bent his head, cupping his jaw with his hand, and then his lips touched Will's. Around him, the air seemed to be crackling. He had no idea what to do, but Onyx took the lead, pressing several kisses against his mouth until the nerves calmed slightly. Without thinking, he opened his mouth slightly, feeling the caress of Onyx's tongue. Clumsily, he kissed the boy back, his blood bubbling through his veins.

He was tomato-red when the kiss ended, terrified that Onyx found it awful, that he would never want another kiss.

But the boy gave him a wink. "Relax. You did fine."

Will bent his head.

"No shame," Onyx whispered, his fingers sliding through his hair as he pulled Will's head against his chest.

Will leaned into the embrace gratefully as his heart tried to find a normal rhythm again. But he smiled, from ear to ear.