—
Bella
What words are left when your whole life implodes?
What things can people possibly tell you—what can you possibly tell yourself—that will make you feel better?
No "just a boyfriend."
No "there will be others."
No "you're too young to feel this way."
Nothing.
Because no one truly understood what it was I'd lost.
I hadn't lost a boyfriend.
I hadn't even lost a soulmate.
I had lost myself.
A family had always been what I wanted. A family to love me and take care of me the way a family was supposed to. I wanted love and to be loved. And I wanted to have that for longer than a single lifetime.
That's what they had been to me.
They had no idea just how much they answered everything I had ever wanted. It was as if every wish—prayer—bargain—I had ever made was suddenly given to me all at once.
Brothers and sisters who loved hanging out with me, parents who actually cared enough to make sure I was looked after.
A mate who had my every quality and many more as well.
Vampire … I hadn't been expecting that kind of immortality. But I accepted it willingly and without question. It was like learning the word for something I'd always known I would be. Vampire. Of course. That's who I was. Eternal thirst was more than enough of a price to pay for eternal happiness.
All the parts of myself I had loved, all the things I wanted.
And now it was all gone.