Troubleshoot

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to SM.

The Offer

Jacob took Bella's hand away from his face, his expression hard and unyielding. That had to be the most patronizing thing she had ever said to him.

"What are you babbling about?"

Bella, hurt by his rejection, gazed up at him sadly. "Edward told me once what it was like-your imprinting thing. He said it was like A Midsummer Night's Dream, like magic. You'll find who you're really looking for, Jacob, and maybe all of this madness will make sense."

Jacob felt like screaming. She couldn't be serious, surely? She knew him better than that. Or, at least, he thought she did. Maybe he had been wrong about that, just like he had been wrong about everything else in his life so far. Maybe he had been fooling himself into thinking they had shared a special connection all this time. Jacob scowled at Bella fiercely, getting some satisfaction when he watched her flinch away from him.

Yes, he could play the bad guy when he wanted. And right now, he felt very bad indeed.

"If you think imprinting can make any sense of this insanity…" He struggled for words; he was so incensed. "Are you really hoping that I might someday imprint on some stranger so that it would make all that has happened between us right?" He jabbed his forefinger at her accusingly. "How dare you! You, more than anyone, know how I feel about the concept!"

"Jake, please, I never meant – "

"Then explain this to me, Bella." Jacob continued, cutting her off before she could issue another one of her useless apologies. "Explain to me what the point was of loving you? I suppose it would make it very convenient for you if I did imprint, right? Problem solved. It would absolve you of all guilt, so you can justify to yourself that you made the right decision when you chose the damn bloodsucker over me!"

Jacob completely lost his cool, letting out an involuntary growl. Bella flinched, but he kept going. He was wound up, tense, and angry. How often had he yelled at her exactly like this in his dreams?

"When you die" – the words came out as a snarl – "how is that ever right again? What's the point to the pain? Mine, yours, his! What was the point of your twisted, sick little love story in the end? If there is any sense, please show me, Bella, because I don't see it."

Tears formed in the corners of Bella's eyes as she gazed up at him helplessly. She had endured Jacob's anger before, but never on this scale. "I don't know yet, Jake." She cried in anguish. "But I just…feel…that this is all going somewhere good, hard to see as it is now, I guess you could call it faith."

Jacob peered down at Bella from his great height, looking at her as if she was insane. He was beginning to think the girl he loved had been replaced with an imposter.

"You're going to kill yourself for nothing, Bella. Nothing!"

"I'm not killing myself for nothing!" Bella said through gritted teeth. "Don't be so crass!"

"That's a load of crap, Bella. You've been trying to keep up with the supernatural for so long, its messing with your mind. No normal person would ever consider throwing away their humanity, turning their back on those they loved, and those who love them, to become some cold, hard statue."

Jacob gave up on the no touching rule and took her face in his hand. He had to remind himself to be gentle, he was having trouble keeping it together, everything about her screamed breakable. If he snapped and lost control she could potentially become another Emily.

"You see my change as the ending of my life." Bella retorted. "However, I see it as the beginning."

"Its not a change, Bella. Its death!"

Bella grimaced. "I can do this. I can do this." She muttered, sounding a lot like that kids' book about the engine that could.

"Doesn't sound like that to me. It sounds like you're trying to convince yourself. Why did you really come here, Bella? And don't give me that bullshit story about resurrecting that damn truck!"

Bella jerked her face out of his hold, a sliver of golden light fracturing her eyes. She didn't answer his question, merely turning her head away, staring into the middle distance.

Jacob felt a twinge of guilt at the way he had verbally attacked her. He had been so close to losing control completely. It was dangerous. A huge red flag. What was going on between them was far from healthy. Why couldn't he let go? Why couldn't she?

He shoved the thought away and started in on the begging, hating himself even as the words left his mouth.

"Listen to me, Bells. You don't need to do this."

It was in that moment that Jacob realized the difference maintaining her humanity meant to him. He realized he needed her to stay alive, otherwise it would surely kill him. He took a deep breath.

"Don't wait until its too late, Bella. Not that way. Live. Okay? Just live. Don't do this to me." His voice rose in pitch, got more passionate. "Remember when I got mangled up by those newborns? You were so cut up about it. What did you tell me?"

Jacob waited, but Bella refused to answer. She pressed her lips together.

"You told me to be good and listen to Carlisle." He reminded her fervently. "And what did I do? I listened to the vampire. For you."

"You listened because it was the right thing to do." Bella finally broke her silence.

"Yes, it was." Jacob restrained himself from grabbing hold of her and shaking some sense into her. "And you know I'm right. You know that you should be listening to me now. Even the bloodsucker doesn't want you to change. I know. He as good as told me."

Bella's face turned pink. The color was so beautiful-it twisted Jacob's stomach like a knife. A serrated knife, rusty and ragged.

He was going to lose this. Again. It was too much to bear.

"And what about children, Bella? Have you thought about that? Once you change, you can't take it back. You'll never experience the joy of being a mother. How can you reconcile that, huh?"

Bella took a deep breath, her hand automatically finding its way to her stomach. "I accepted long ago that there would be a price to pay – motherhood being one of them." She admitted in a low voice.

Jacob refused to give up, the very fact that his words had unconsciously triggered her to touch the very place where the fetus would grow raised his hopes.

"Just think, if you stayed human, you would have some pretty baby in there, Bella. He or she would be like a little version of you. Can you imagine that?"

"That's not fair, Jacob."

"What you're letting yourself miss out on is not fair, Bella. You'll exist for an eternity full of regret, I promise you."

"I am not as pessimistic as you, Jacob. I know what I want."

Jacob couldn't answer. He looked down and breathed deep and slow, trying to get a grip on his fury.

"Jake." Bella whispered, reaching up with the same hand that had just cradled her empty stomach, she patted his hair, stroked his cheek. "I know you're hurting. I know you think I haven't thought enough about the consequences of my decision-but that's just it- its my decision. Not yours. Not Edward's. Mine alone."

"You haven't." Jacob snarled. "You'll regret it, I know it, because I know you."

"It's going to be okay." Bella soothed. "Ssh. Its okay."

Jacob didn't look at her. "No. It will not be okay."

Bella wiped something from his cheek. "Shh."

Jacob stared at his feet. They were dirty. He hadn't even noticed. "I can't believe you're prepared to give everything up. What you're doing doesn't make any sense."

"It does to me. I never really cared about having a baby. When I was growing up, I never even considered parenthood, I never factored it into my future. I've never been a maternal person. I've never oohed and aahed at little kids like some do. I know being with Edward ruled out ever being able to bear a child."

"You're wrong again. I've seen you around kids, remember. I've seen how good you are with them. You're in denial."

"I'm not."

"Edward Cullen is a killer, Bella. Look at yourself."

"He's not. Its me. I'm just weak and human."

"Aw, come on! Shut up, Bella. You can spout this crap to your bloodsucker, but you're not fooling me."

Bella glared up at him, her hand leaving his face and unconsciously clutching at her stomach. Jacob's fury vanished like a light being switched off. He knew he was dangerously close to making her a reckless offer, one that when he put it out there, he could never take back, that might just end them both.

"Bella." He said roughly.

Bella heard the change in his voice. She looked up, breathing heavy, eyes confused.

"Bella, don't do this."

"Jake – "

"Listen to me. Don't get your back up yet. Okay. Just listen. What if…?"

"What if what?"

"What if…if…I made you a deal? What if it wasn't all or nothing?"

"Jake, what are you trying to say? I won't – "

"I'm not done yet. So, you stay alive for now. You can have a baby. Experience motherhood."

Bella frowned. She raised her hand and touched the place where his eyebrows were mashing together. Her fingers gently smoothed his forehead for a moment while she tried to make sense of what he was getting at.

"What do you mean, Jacob? Having a baby with Edward is out of the realms of possibility. If you're hinting at adoption, that wouldn't work, either, because Edward wouldn't let me. I'm sure any baby – "

"Not just any baby." Jacob snapped. "The dude is frozen time; I know it's never going to happen. I'm not talking about him."

Bella was still confused, uncertain of what he was proposing. "What then?"

But Jacob couldn't say anymore. This was crazy. He was crazy. There was no point. He would never be able to save her from herself. He'd never been able to do that.

Then Bella blinked, and she suddenly got it.

"Oh, I see. Please, Jacob. You think I should artificially inseminate myself or something? I can't have Edward's actual baby, but a generic substitute would be fine?" She was mad now, her anger rising. "Why would I want to have a stranger's baby? I suppose it just doesn't make a difference? Any baby will do? Just to keep me alive? Just so I get to experience what its like being a mother?"

"I didn't mean that." Jacob muttered, heat rising to his cheeks. "Not a stranger."

Bella tilted her face up to his, scrutinizing his expression. "Then what are you saying?"

"Nothing. I'm saying nothing. Same as ever."

Bella's hand went back to her stomach, her fingers made small circular motions on her stomach as she chewed her bottom lip thoughtfully. It was quiet for a long time as neither spoke.

"Not a stranger." Bella murmured after a while, still making circular motions on her flat stomach. Jacob flinched, but maintained his silence. "You mentioned a deal?"

Suddenly her eyes locked on Jacob's, and he could see that he'd already given too much away.

Bella's mouth fell open a little. "Wow." She breathed.

It was silent for a few heartbeats. Jacob looked down at his feet again, unable to meet her stare.

"Jacob, surely you can't be proposing that we have a baby together?"

Jacob looked up at her sharply, a bitter smile forming on his face. "Maybe you're not the only crazy one, Bella. Or maybe your insanity is catching. But, yes, that's exactly what I mean."

It was on the table now, what he was offering. There was no taking it back now.

A/N-thanks for reading!