A/N: I have been rewatching Chicago PD to try and get back into it. I have noticed little moments where Jay could have influenced Voight behind the scenes. I thought I would write some and see where we end up. These oneshots are designed to be shorter stories. Just things that could have happened off screen. If there are any suggestions feel free to comment/review and I will add it to a list. I am also thinking about doing oneshots for the relationship between Jay and Antonio.

Summary: Set at the end of Season 1 episode 7, just before Voight goes into the interrogation room to hug Justin. Jay needs to have a word with Voight and he's hoping that his own experiences would be enough for Voight to see what landmine he was about to step all over.

The Start Of An Understanding

Once Antonio left Voight's office, Jay made the decision to head inside. He really had no idea how well this would go over. He's been in Intelligence for three months now and so far he's had some mixed feelings about it. From being in the Rangers, he was used to having to work for different personalities. He was even used to working for shady characters. Jay could normally get over it and he was with Voight, but he just didn't know if Voight was good for Chicago or not. Not yet anyways. Yes, he had a good solve rate, but was he doing more harm than good to get that solve right? That had yet to be determined by Jay. However, he was sticking around because it was an elite unit. Everyone wanted to be in Intelligence and that included Jay.

When he was shot, there wasn't a single question about where he wanted to be placed. Jay was used to Sargents trying to get their hands on him. He made a name for himself right in the academy within that first week. He knew SWAT wanted him on a team, some had even offered him to be promoted and have his own team. But that wasn't what Jay wanted. He wanted to have the puzzle with the action. He didn't want to run into buildings, grab a target and then move on to the next target. He wanted to investigate cases and help people. He wanted the human contact.

He still wanted to be here, but he was mostly staying because he had Antonio. He knew that as long as Antonio was here, then he would be here. He believed in Antonio and he was the type of cop Jay wanted to be. He was always going to have his back and he was hoping that he would never have to pick between Antonio and Voight. Even though him and Voight didn't really have much of a relationship or rapport with each other. He also knew Voight believed that him and Erin were attracted to each other, but Jay honestly had no idea how he felt about Erin or how she truly felt about him. It seemed like she was using him just to get a rise out of Voight and Jay wasn't about that type of game.

What he needed to talk to Voight about though, it wasn't about Erin and it was something he suspected Voight was not going to appreciate, but he needed to hear it. Jay let out a deep sigh, before he stood up and crossed the short distance over to Voight's office.

"What?" Voight demanded and Jay knew this was not off to a great start.

Jay went and closed the door before he went and sat down on the arm of the couch and spoke. "I was an angry kid. I know a lot of teenagers are angry, but I was one incident away from being a school shooter when I was fifteen. I planned it. I had a kill list and I mapped out my route of the school. I knew their schedule so I wouldn't miss any. I even timed the response time for the cops." Jay admitted for the first time.

Voight was very confused about this whole conversation and why Jay was telling him. He never would have expected though that Jay could have been a school shooter. He knew Jay was angry, but lots of people were angry when certain situations were presented to him. He cared, he wore his heart on his sleeve and if someone was in trouble, he was going. There was never any hesitation and Voight knew there never would be. He was a good man and he meant what he said, he could be a great cop one day. Assuming his heart and anger didn't get the best of him. But Voight couldn't picture Jay being a school shooter.

Voight went and half sat against the side of his desk as he spoke. "Jay." He started, but Jay kept talking.

"My older brother, Will, and I grew up in the Irish community within Canaryville. We got full ride scholarships to this private catholic school that was filled with entitled rich kids. We never belonged, but the kids seemed to hate me more than him. I was never social and I prefer to keep to myself, more introverted. Still am, unless it's with the right people." He said with a shrug as he continued. "My mom worked as a PSW and worked with terminally ill patients so she was gone most of the time. I'd go a week without even seeing her. My dad worked construction and after every shift he would go out with the boys and get shitfaced. He'd come home and start screaming and throwing shit. It wasn't the safest place to be."

Voight had a feeling that Jay had a questionable childhood. He could tell that he was guarded and there was some pain within him. Voight meant it when he told Erin it was Jay that he was worried about if they should ever hook up. He knew Erin could be with a man and walk away like it was nothing. And despite his hard exterior, Voight could tell that deep down, Jay was a lost boy looking for a family. And to him, it would never be just fun sexy time. It was why it could never happen, because Erin would never stay. She was a great person, but Voight knew her better than anyone and she had more of Bunny in her than she wanted to admit. She would be great as long as everything was good between them and Jay was doing what she wanted. But the second things would get hard, she would distance herself and run, blaming Jay for her shortcomings. It wouldn't be fair to Jay and Voight suspected Jay had his own problems. Specifically PTSD, something he knew Erin would never be strong enough to handle.

"One day I was out walking. I had been beaten up the day before and I couldn't bring myself to go to school. Everyone ignored me, but this one guy, Major Roth. He was a former Army Major that worked for an ROTC program. He didn't like how injured I was, but I refused to go to see a doctor. He eventually coaxed me to go with him to his ROTC center just a few blocks away to get looked at by the medic there. Once the Doc said I would be fine, he started to show me around the place. Told me how they were all a family. All I ever wanted was to belong to something. He saved my life that day. He saved thirty-six lives if I had gotten my way."

"I'm not really sure why you're telling me this?" Voight gently said. He was shocked by what he was learning and he was seeing Jay in a whole different light right now. He had deeper levels than he thought and underneath his hard exterior, he was very damaged and Voight didn't know if he would ever be healed from it.

"Because I need you to know that I know what it feels like to be broken on the inside. To be angry at the world, but at myself. Hating myself and feeling like I was never going to mount to anything. I'm not a father and obviously I'm not Justin's father. But he is standing in front of a crossroad, you know that. Just like you know that you are the one that will ultimately make the decision for him. Justin will either keep doing what he's doing, doing Outfitter shit and in and out of jail until he ends up killed. Or he's gonna do something and you're gonna cover for him and you both go down, potentially taking Erin and O with you."

Jay knew he wasn't telling Voight anything he already didn't know. The man was backed into a corner and he needed to make a change or everyone was going to be paying the price for Justin's actions.

"There is a third path though and it's not going to be easy for either of you, but if you make him take it, then he has a real chance at having a life. You both do." Jay finished.

"And what's that?" Voight asked, because he honestly couldn't see a way out of this that would benefit everyone. He knew Justin needed help, but he didn't think he would be able to fix him. Justin had to want to fix himself first.

"I was in the Rangers for five years, four of which I was leading my unit. I've seen rookies like him all the time. They show up broken on the inside with no skills, no purpose, barely a support system, if any at all. But then they get into a routine. They have structure, they learn life skills, skills they can take with them when they get out. They have a purpose and a family. A real brotherhood that will stay with them forever. Justin is broken and I'm not judging, I'm not saying that to be mean, it's the truth. The Army saved me. It broke me down and built me back up into a good man. And it can do the same for him. He will do what you tell him right now. He's at the perfect state of mind for you to save his life, even if that means he's going to hate you for it for a little while."

Voight had never thought about sending Justin into the army. He himself was never in it, but he knew from other veterans on the force how much it changed their lives. How good it was for them. He also knew how horrible it could be. He didn't know if he wanted that for his son. If he wanted him to go through that type of pain by being overseas. He didn't know if he could handle having his son being sent off to war.

"I don't know Jay. I can't see him going off to war. I don't think I can do that." Voight admitted.

"You don't have to. Not everyone goes on tour. Once he's through Basic, he can do anything he wants. He could become a mechanic and work on base. He could be in communications, supply, human resources, hell, he could go to College and become an officer if he wanted. He doesn't have to go on tour or on missions. And if he gets out in four years, he can take those skills with him. Or he could stay in and work at different bases all over the country. Some can even go over to Europe and work on one of our bases over there. I know a handful of guys working on base in fucking Italy getting paid to work on tanks and drink."

At first Voight wasn't sure about any of this, but now it was starting to sound like a viable option. If Justin didn't have to go on tour, if he could work on a base, then that made Voight feel better. He would be safe, but also getting the structure and skills he needed to hopefully become a good man. A man that not only could Voight be proud of, but also Justin to be proud of himself.

"How long would all of the testing take?" That was going to be the trick. Voight didn't know if he could keep Justin around long enough to go over all of the testing he would need.

"Eighteen-ninety-seven Brock Boulevard, there is an Army Recruitment center. A buddy of mine that owes me a shitload of favors can get Justin on the eight-thirty bus for Basic Training. Normally there is a bunch of paperwork and tests, but he can do all of that while in Basic. He got a clean bill of health in prison before he left, so he should be able to pass all of the physical tests and he's in good shape, so he can pass the basic fitness requirements. He could be on a bus in forty minutes and on the road to a whole new life. But you have to hold firm or he won't stick with it. It's going to be hard at first. Different aspects will remind him of prison, but after that first week, he'll start to see things differently. The comradery will kick in and slowly he'll start to heal. You just gotta make sure he knows there is no room for failure and there are no other options."

"You really think he could do it? Honestly?" Voight asked, because it all sounded good, but he didn't know if Justin had it in him for that life.

"I think he needs more than just you and Erin to succeed. And that's not a knock against either of you, it's just life. You both have busy careers and you can't be jumping everytime he calls or needs something. If he stays in Chicago, he will go back to his old friends and you'll never get off the carousel. I have seen guys just like Justin, guys worse than him, and they have managed to make it and turn around to be great men. I think he could be a great soldier. He just needs someone to pull it out of him."

Jay knew it wasn't going to be easy, but if Justin felt like he had no other option, then he could make it. He could be someone great. Jay didn't know if Justin would take to being a shooter or not, but that was something he would be able to discover for himself during Basic. He would find other guys like him all in desperate need of a fresh start and that should be enough to encourage him and keep him on track. If it didn't, then at least Voight could say he did everything he could to save Justin's life.

Voight gave a nod before he spoke. "I appreciate you doing this. I'll keep this between us."

Voight knew that Jay was a very private person. He didn't like talking about himself and he wasn't really a social person. Voight could understand that and he respected Jay's boundaries. It was clear that Jay had never spoken about this to anyone and Voight wasn't about to disclose any intel.

"'Preciate it." Jay said with a small nod as he stood up.

There wasn't really much left to say, so Jay headed out of Voight's office and he left it to Voight to decide what he was going to do with his son. He was hoping that Voight sent Justin to the army recruitment center. It was the best possible outcome for everyone, especially Erin. Jay knew without a doubt that Erin would go down with Voight and she didn't deserve it. For now, he would go back to doing his job and waiting for the next landmine to come his way.

The End.