Causality
Author's Note: Enjoy the story and R&R.
Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to or of KamiErabi GOD. app.
Pairing: Goro x Akitsu.
Summary:
God mustn't be selfish.
God is the ultimate falsehood.
Why? What does God stand for? Is there value in this world God built where you can't choose your future?
What shit by the name of God stands idly by while people's bodies pile up? Escalating to numbers so grand they plummet from the sky into the public eye, not rain that's falling?
That let Iyo-chan suffer such harassment, she had no escape except to paint a blood portrait for the candidate who'd completely mimic her form, voice, memories, and even the pain?
That spurned Goro's sister's wish to be born happy, denying her existence when "it" was a problem, and not a matter of life or death?
Selfish. A wee bit unfair?
Wonder, children. Desire.
The price God ought to pay is a vote of no-confidence.
Punishment and introductions will have to wait.
Goro's mom was a whore, even before her son twisted his karma for the first time. She was garbage, even before he lifted the staff and made his own life history worse to undo Sawa-san's mincing by satellite debris.
His mother wore the mob's mask. Goro remembers her face now. Indifferent. Inconvenienced.
He wasn't her only unwanted child. The pregnancy test in the trash was the proof.
Lall…Yes, I finally understand why you're the way you are. Why you're so close to being human, and why you're so crazy for Senpai's cooking you'd eat it off the ground. You didn't have a chance to taste this world for yourself.
The highs and the lows. The hot and the cold.
Unnoticed by anyone, in the place of which everyone dreams.
Lall referred to him as her sibling after he ran from Game Heaven. He didn't consider she might mean they were literal siblings.
Goro was selfless. He listened. He heard. His unborn sister's wish. The weirdo she could've been, had she been one of the lucky ones.
All their wishes.
Twinkle, twinkle, little star.
Honoka's wish for her brother to be alive again. Not a rotten ball of flesh and neglect and abuse squeezed like a lemon into the locked room of the apartment. The same apartment where she murdered their parents.
Chika's wish to amount to something. Heal through parascience.
Tatsuya's wish to be strong and not weak to eliminate the disparity between those chosen to be athletic, beautiful, and wealthy and those not accepted.
Mitsuko's wish to comfort and soothe the tired masses.
Kyo's wish to banish fear and put an end to predestination's curse. His noble creed.
But Goro isn't God. Not quite.
"My wish belongs to me. I won't let you have it," Ryo counters. Effectively God, as Kyo saw her.
God sees an unending array of worlds and doors to parallel possibilities, but can't fix the sea she's in. Chained to her wheelchair and to Kyo's illness. To the distress of losing Kyo, God's cat in Schrödinger's box.
The oxygen of any world she's in or manifests is poison to her. Alternate/divergent dimensions and times.
She can replace her brother with his drones from infinite space, yet resurrecting the brother her father couldn't save is as futile as the future. The light hasn't reached him yet.
Her power's range: limited to every world BUT her original.
The girl who couldn't see who could see everything. Everywhere. Every where. Into every "if."
If you took a trip, where would you want to go?
Ryo is the Hadamard gate to Goro's Fourier transform. Close your eyes, cover your ears, and afterwards they'd have the world in the palm of their hands.
Sense by sense, Goro lost his capacity to feel until he was worse off than Ryo. Until he and Lall shared the unlucky distinction of not existing.
"Do what you want. Decision's yours." Akitsu punches commands on the bloody controller, coughing more blood. He pushes the middle button and Mitsuko-san's porno plays on the television, yet Goro doesn't react drastically this time. He does what Akitsu knows he can do, that none of them can do.
Hear. Listen. Efface the self, so that those with less may have their wishes given air.
Akitsu continues his cryptic offerings just a wink. Angel scripts, the incantations and divine entreaties Ryo's father rejected.
I wish for you to kill me so you can be God.
I trust you to keep us safe.
Goro had a real wish. Not a high schooler's perverted fantasy, but a real wish he'd almost forgotten.
You say one thing when you mean something else.
You wish selfishly, but there is nuance hiding beyond.
The physical. A kitchen knife, a sword, a spear, or a harpoon wound. Flammable materials. Bare fists.
The metaphysical. An idea, a hope, a hallucination, or an echo. A voiceless wish.
Akitsu. What did you truly wish for?
"Give me five seconds to answer, Goro-kins."
Akitsu was an odd duck from the start (waddled like one too). Damaged. Strange.
"I wish you were naked."
When Akitsu was alive, Goro would have screamed at him, demanding what he was thinking. He did…over Akitsu's suggestion they might as well beat it next to each other.
But now Goro gets it. The secret message beneath Akitsu's teasing. His pain concealed with dark humour and a poorly timed, classic "Wanna play Mancala?"
I wish you were naked. To see you as you are. To be with you – my finest of dear friends – divorced from the world of delusions.
The naked you. Your soul. Your kindred spirit.
The naked you wouldn't be too bad either.
The Fool's Sutra. Carnival. Time Switcher. Control Freak. Entropy Mask. Mercurius.
Connections. Veins in the assembly. Interchangeable parts.
"Bleed my heart dry. Leave me here to die."
God can't be centered on one alone, for fuck's sake!
God must scrap.
God must build. Anneal. Cut through the noise and the gibberish.
Ono Goro.
Call him Mister Causality if you wish.
Call him God if you must.
"Please record your wish."
Stupid smartphone.
Debug. Overwrite. GAME RE:START.
It'll be all all right.
Begin the second cour.