Stars flashed. The room span. Everything swayed. Someone shouted in the distance, and then—

Lucas opened his eyes.

Silence.

The first thing he noticed was the state of the room. The Christmas tree was on its side, branches crumpled under their own weight. Shattered baubles littered the floor, a string of lights blinking miserably beside them. Then came the people, in about as much disrepair: Bowser unconscious on the floor, Toon Link nursing his wounds, Mario's body collapsing out of the wardrobe.

Mumbling to himself, Lucas took to his feet, his head thundering in protest. There was a torn-up wreath on the floor, neat twists in ruin, leaves scattered. Link was crouched behind the Christmas tree, wheezing, when suddenly, Zelda appeared and whacked him in the side.

"Hey!" Lucas felt himself hurrying over. "What are you doing?"

"I'm doing what I like!" Zelda said, snarling. "He's a cheating asshole. He gets what he deserves!"

A knock followed. Lucas turned to see Luigi, smiling, holding a batch of cookies. But when he saw the desolation, they clattered to the ground. "Mamma-mia! What-a the hell happened?"

"Umm…" Lucas looked back at Zelda, who was now shoving Link to the floor. "I don't know."

"But look at all this mess…!" Luigi bent down to save his cookies, and Lucas moved to help, though his eyes were drawn to a piece of paper beside them. It was all too familiar at this point.

[BY ORDER OF THE HIGH APPENDAGE OF SMASH MANOR]

You fools. You snivelling fools.
The budget is low,
and money is tight,
So take down your bells,
and turn off your lights,
For I must declare, and it brings me such joy,
Christmas is cancelled! for all girls and boys!

He grimaced.

"Oh, your-a head!" Luigi said suddenly. "Lucas, ah, are you-a okay!?"

Lucas barely mustered a shrug. His skull was pounding from whatever fall he'd taken. There was glitter everywhere, tinsel, torn wrapping paper, boxes, too much. Just — too much.

"I only," Lucas managed. "I only wanted to prove a point..."

His headache was made worse when the door burst open again, and Ness rushed in, brandishing something red.

"Lucas! You're awake! Oh, thank God, I got the first aid kit, here, sit down, you need a plaster? Some water? Ice?"

"Ness—"

"Anything at all! There's so much in here!" Ness was practically upending the first aid kit onto the floor. "Lucas — gah, I'm so sorry! Just — tell me what you need!"

What did he need? Blearily, Lucas stumbled backward, sitting on the bed. The wall in front of him was charred. The wall — that's right, Mario and Luigi's dormitory, he remembered. The fire. The noise. Master Hand…

There was a lurch in his stomach. Ness came to his side, brandishing plasters, and as he spoke, Lucas felt his throat closing up.

"I think this is all my fault."

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.

(30 Minutes Earlier)

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.

Ness could only watch as Bowser gave a great roar, fire flooding from his mouth. Wario jumped aside, but the flames scorched the wall. Guests screamed, running for the door, and Ness had to dodge the stampede, just one thought in his mind: holy shit.

"Everybody!" Princess Peach cried. "Calm down, we can sort this out!"

"I know it was you!" Roy bellowed, drawing his sword and lunging at Donkey Kong. "You've always hated Christmas, you Scrooge!"

"I do not!" The ape surged forward, tearing a paper crown from his head. "This is slander! Slander!"

So much for a secret Christmas party: this was pandemonium. Ness ducked a flying bauble. Ryu tightened his bandanna, running headlong at Mii Gunner. Paint splattered over them, Inkling missing Ridley completely, and then they were in a four-way brawl.

Suddenly, Sonic raced by, and Ness barely had time to dodge. Another bauble whizzed past his head. Someone else crashed into him, and he was sent tumbling to the floor. Nausea rose, the tang of all that Christmas pudding at the back of his throat… lost, for a moment, Ness gasped for air. Suddenly, Lucas rolled past.

"Ack!"

Lucas said something incomprehensible back, something like What the hell is going on? There was another great roar, and Ness grabbed for his friend.

"We gotta get out of here — they're throwing things—"

"I just wanted to prove a point," Lucas gasped, "I don't know — why's it all gone crazy—"

Metal clinked against metal. Captain Falcon had taken arms against Bowser, and the two were locked in frantic combat. Samus yelled as she was tripped by Isabelle's fishing rod, and Isabelle grinned, reeling her in. A great sweep of Bowser's arm took out Toon Link, the Hylian tumbling to the ground.

"I didn't think it'd be like this!" Ness said. "I told you, you didn't have to come — damn it, Lucas—"

CRASH. The great Christmas Tree was sent toppling, and Ness yelled, barely ducking out of its way. Revealed behind it were Link and Daisy, locked in an embrace. Zelda gave a great bellow and Ness had to duck a flurry of magic, trying to scramble back, but—

"Out of my way!" Bowser roared, shoving past, toward Captain Falcon. Accusations flew from the swordsmen. Link tried to flee, but Zelda leapt on him, barrelling them both into a string of lights.

"You cheating bastard!"

"Let's get out of here!" Lucas cried, grabbing Ness's arm, and Ness tried to focus on his voice, not his wildly lurching stomach. He ran but crashed straight into Mewtwo.

"I sense it," said the Pokémon sternly. "This has something to do with you—"

Clang. Mewtwo fell away. King DeDeDe stepped from behind him, brandishing a hammer. Mumbling a thanks, Ness began to run, but DeDeDe turned to face Lucas, and—

WHAM.

.

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(1 Hour Earlier)

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Lucas watched as Link took Daisy's hand and towed her behind the Christmas tree. It was lucky, he thought to himself, that Zelda was busy talking to Cloud, though it was weird all the same. Was this what alcohol did to people? Made them cheat on their beloveds? The world of partying and drinking still seemed impossibly out of reach to him, yet here he was.

The jukebox was blaring Hark the Herald Angels Sing. Peach rushed over to turn it down, cringing at a particularly loud note as if it would summon Master Hand right to the room. Lucas swayed a little, but wasn't really feeling it.

"Hey, Falcon!" Bowser roared nearby. "I bet you're too weak to take this shot!"

There was a raucous laugh. Some people were quite drunk at this point; Lucas looked down at his own cup (apple juice) and downed it whole, beginning to consider just blowing this place. His point had been proven. Ness was right, he didn't like partying; it was too loud. Not enough space to think. Lucas was at his best when he could think and make plans and have ideas, which didn't align well with Christmas on the whole.

He wished Ness would come back, actually. He, along with the rest of his friends, had abandoned him. Villager was sneaking up on a mince pie. Toon Link was pouring some Prosecco. Ness was busy introducing himself to the Christmas pudding. So much for a lovely time. So much for Christmas.

All of a sudden, there was a hard knock at the door.

The party froze.

"Ah, Luigi!" Mario said, though his voice carried some unease. "Back-a already? — AUGH!"

And Lucas's heart sank too, because there, on the other side of the door, was Master Hand. There was a great rush of movement; Peach whacked the jukebox blaring Christmas carols, Bowser lumbered over as if to hide the great Christmas tree, and Ness stuffed the whole Christmas pudding in his mouth.

"Well, well," Master Hand said, fingers wiggling around in glee. "A Christmas Party, eh?"

"Master-a Hand," Mario began. "I can-a explain—"

"And I would love you to! Why, I had been wondering why there were no festivities this year. No presents. No Tree! And I find you all hidden away here… why so secretive?"

Peach stepped gracefully forward. "Why, Master Hand, only because of you." She drew the paper from her dress. Behind her, Mario was hiding in the wardrobe. "You see, we just… we couldn't bear it, having no Christmas. Everyone was so sad, so miserable. We had to do something! I… apologise, profusely."

"Hmmm…" Master Hand put his hand to his non-existent chin. Peach always had been best at placating him. "How interesting…" But suddenly he laughed, plucking the paper from Peach's hand. "By order of the High Appendage? Ha! I would not write this! What kind of megalomaniac would?"

Confusion rippled through the party.

"But… it's your handwriting," Ryu said, stepping forward. "It's your declaration."

"It is most certainly not!" Master Hand sounded almost like Crazy Hand in his mirth. "No, this is a forgery. A terrible one, too. Child's play! I would not be so foolish as to cancel Christmas."

"Then… Master Hand?" Peach raised a dainty eyebrow. "You mean to say… Christmas is not canceled?"

"Of course it's not! Why would it be?"

"Well... the budget?"

"The budget?" Master Hand peered at the notice again. "Nonsense. My dear, the Christmas season is great for the budget. Festive deals, festive treats… no, I love Christmas. Clearly, someone among you hates Christmas so much… that they tried to cancel it in my name."

There was an uneasy silence. Lucas felt his stomach clenching, already hearing the accusations in his mind. He'd been perfectly vocal about his dislike of parties, had only forced himself along to this one to prove a point to Ness, and had spent the last couple Christmases being perfectly antisocial…

"Well, tally-ho!" Master Hand chirruped. "I'll let you figure that one out. Good luck!"

Master Hand floated away, but he left silence in his wake. Princess Peach was the only one brave enough to speak.

"Well," she said smoothly. "No need to worry about that, then. Shall we get on with celebrating?"

But eyes were whizzing around the room, laying on each other, full of suspicion. Nobody moved to switch the jukebox back on. Nobody poured themselves another drink.

"I think it was Bowser," said Captain Falcon at last. "I think Bowser cancelled Christmas."

"What!?" Bowser roared, and it all escalated from there.

.

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(2 Hours Earlier)

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"I hope we brought enough snacks," Ness said as they approached Mario's dormitory. His heart was pounding, and no amount of chiding himself had made it go away. "I - I mean, that was our one job, and if we fail, we'll get kicked out! And that'd be no good, because, y'know, it's Christmas, and—"

"Ness," Lucas whispered, and Ness felt a prod at his side. "Secret party, remember?"

"Oh. Y-Yeah. Sorry."

Of course, Ness only managed to stay quiet for ten seconds.

"Y'know, you really don't have to come along if you don't want to. Like, you really really don't. And I'm happy to stay back with you if you w-want, I know you hate parties and noise and, well, people in general, so—"

"Ness, shut up. We're here."

Lucas rapped harshly on the door, to which Mario emerged beaming, finger on his lips.

He spoke in a whisper, "Welcome! Welcome, so-a happy to see you! And all those-a snacks, mamma-mia…"

Many an item was liberated from Ness as he was hurried inside. The dormitory had been well-stocked, carols playing on the jukebox, drinks on the table, a beautiful Christmas tree in the center. It seemed like a grown-up sort of party, which was new. Ness supposed those things came with getting older. It didn't ease his fears.

"Thanks for the invitation," Ness said. "Where's your brother?"

"Luigi's just-a baking some cookies," Mario murmured. "But, shhh, hm? If Master Hand finds out…"

It didn't need saying. Master Hand's rule was cold, and disobedience was met with punishment. Once again, Ness shivered.

Villager and Toon Link waved their greetings, and that warmed his heart, at least, especially as Lucas got himself talking to them. It had only been this year that Lucas had really, properly, started to come out of his shell. Well — to an extent, he was still a recluse (and a bit of a nihilist) but he put in appearances. He smiled. People liked him.

Still… Ness knew that Lucas didn't particularly enjoy the festive season. The last one didn't count, because they'd been deathly ill, but the one before, Lucas had tried to spend it among the cold stalks of the sunflowers. He felt it, in his heart, that Lucas might be anywhere but here if he could, that he put on a brave face at Christmas because it was expected. That he chose to be kind and agreeable instead of bitter, and hollow, and all the other emotions that came with being imprisoned in a megalomaniac's fighting game. Lucas had insisted on coming to this party just to make a point of that agreeableness, Ness thought. Ness also thought they were good enough friends to not lie to each other.

"How about some Christmas games?" suggested Princess Peach, in the loudest whisper she could muster. "Blind man's buff? Charades?"

The games were played. Predictably, the room crescendoed throughout, someone sneaking up the volume of the jukebox, whispers becoming giggles becoming cheers. Ness won at charades (if such a thing was possible) and even Lucas did pretty well at Pin the tail on the reindeer. As alcohol was imbibed, Ness noticed the occasional flare-up, Link and Zelda whispering furiously at various points, Captain Falcon clearly getting on Bowser's nerves with his taunts. Still, his nerves settled with a couple apple juices and snacks; he, Ness, loved Christmas. More than almost anything. And this was so much better than the last 20 days of nothing.

Lucas was starting to look tired, though, barely mustering up a dance to Hark the Herald Angels Sing. There was a twinge of guilt in Ness's stomach — he should've known. Well, he did, but still. Curse Lucas's stubbornness.

Best to cheer him up somehow. The snack table looked inviting, or maybe the dessert table… bustling past Link and Daisy (who seemed to be holding hands?) he reached a glorious Christmas Pudding…

Knock. Knock. Knock.

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(4 Hours Earlier)

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Even in Smash Manor, the seasons felt long, a miserable winter's light barely scraping the horizon.

It was Christmas Eve, but to Lucas, it didn't feel like it. No candles glowed in the windows. The dormitory was empty.

That stupid notice. Christmas: cancelled. And stupid Master Hand, for doing this to them. Ness stumbled into their shared dormitory from an early morning battle, looking very much swept from his feet.

"Hey."

Lucas just waves.

"Christmas tomorrow."

He nodded. This was the third Christmas — or not-Christmas — they had spent in Smash Manor. With recent budget downsizings, anything deemed unprofitable had been forbidden, and apparently, that included the winter season.

Ness plopped down beside him. "Must be nice for you, not to have to worry about it. Like, no noise, no people, nothing crazy, no presents! I got you something, though." He winked, then raised his hands at Lucas's horrified expression. "I can give it to someone else! I know you wouldn't want — don't want, I guess I thought…"

"I didn't think we were doing presents," Lucas whispered, aware that he sounded idiotic. "I didn't think anyone was. You should've said, I didn't… think to get you one."

Because it's against the rules, he thought to himself. Master Hand's notice had appeared on the first of December, slathered on Smash Manor's noticeboard. A massacre had taken place in the kitchen: every door of every advent calendar had been opened, the chocolates plundered from within. Someone had cut a hole in the feet of all the stockings. The star atop the tree had been replaced with a glove.

It sucked. Really, absolutely, sucked. The people of Smash Manor loved Christmas, and Lucas couldn't help but feel they deserved something nice after this year. When he'd seen that desolation — well, it had been horrible.

"It's okay," Ness said, apparently trying to sound relaxed. "I don't need presents. I'd rather just spend time with you, with our friends. It doesn't have to be Christmassy for me to have a good time."

Lucas frowned. For some reason, Ness had got it in his head that he, Lucas, hated Christmas. It wasn't true, not really. The season just made him think, which was okay, even when it made him sad. He understood the concern — Ness had never really lost anyone, and never knew what to do when Lucas was reflecting. Ness just thought the world should be happy, all the time. It made Lucas's fingers itch to do something, to bring his friend the Christmas he deserved, because actually, he thought to himself, maybe Ness was right.

Just then, the door burst open, the warm hallway light flooding in. It was Toon Link and Villager, carrying a letter and looking delighted with themselves.

"Ness! Lucas! Mario's hosting a party tonight, a secret Christmas party! He gave in, I knew he would!"

Lucas sat up. Ness's eyes widened.

Toon Link beamed. "I said so. I said to them, 'We can't not celebrate Christmas!'" He said it like someone might say, 'We can't murder a family of twelve!' "It'd just be wrong. Morally! And Mario says everyone's invited. Literally everyone! Even Bowser. And us! For once. I'm going to try some Prosecco, all the girls talk about it, like, all the time. I can't wait!"

"And it's safe?" Ness's face was worried, Lucas noticed. "No chance of being found out?"

"None at all!"

"Are you sure?" Ness turned to Villager, the more sensible of the pair. "What about — uh, the noise? Won't Master Hand hear? Or - Or Crazy Hand? Maybe we shouldn't go." He spoke fast, as though Master Hand had delivered the invite himself and was waiting outside to feast on rulebreakers. Lucas's heart sank.

But Villager grinned. "All is in order, my dear friend. Master Hand won't know a thing. And they're being quite restrained! No Christmas songs, just seasonal carols. No presents, just… an exchanging of goods and services. If he asks, we're studying supply and demand economics. Or celebrating Hanukkah, which isn't banned."

"Yeah!" Toon Link exploded. "And we're on snack duty, so you basically have to come. I know you've got a stash!"

Ness laughed. "Okey then, secret party it is! See you there!"

Lucas smiled as the pair hurried off to spread the news. Ness was smiling too, but his face soon melted into worry.

"Lucas… um, if you don't want to go, I'll understand. I don't mind staying back with you. I know parties and Christmas aren't really your thing."

"I—"

"Like, I get it, I completely get it, you're a nihilist and a vampire and you like to be alone. It's no big deal, that's cool."

But Lucas surprised himself with the force of his voice. "Ness, we should go the the party. It's Christmas. That means doing what others want, and I know what Christmas means to you. We're not missing out."

"How about what you want—"

"Maybe this is what I want? Maybe I don't completely hate Christmas and happiness and other people." Lucas stood, drawing himself together and opening up Ness's snack stash, to an outraged noise. "So, now that's sorted, which of these are you willing to surrender?"

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(25 Days Earlier)

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The last day of November.

Ness crept through the hall, smirking to himself.

He had a plan. A devious little plan. One to bring justice — or, rather, to bonk the Scrooge in their midst. The Scrooge being, of course, Lucas.

It had started in their tiny dormitory. Ness sat on his bed, watching as Lucas scribbled away in his notebook. It was a story, apparently, something to do with magic and boarding schools and being trapped in a battle against cyborgs.

"Advent tomorrow!" Ness had said, testing the waters. "You found the number 1 on your advent calendar yet?"

"Mhm."

"I made sure your calendar was huge," Ness continued. "It's got the biggest chocolates ever. I bet it's taller than me."

"Maybe."

Ness had waited for Lucas to say more, but he didn't. Too busy writing. Or being lame. "What do you want for Christmas this year?" he asked instead.

Lucas paused, but he eventually fell into a shrug. "Don't know. Nothing too big."

"But big presents are the best!"

"If you say so."

There was a silence.

"It's just, I don't want to get something you don't like," Ness said eventually. "Or something that's a waste."

And Ness had watched Lucas's face for any sign of reaction, but Lucas just sighed. He'd shot up about five inches since last year (the "Plague Christmas", as Ness now called it) but made up for it by digging deeper into his introspective, apathetic side. And that wouldn't do. That wouldn't do at all.

"Lucas… do you even like Christmas?" Ness asked, and Lucas shrugged again.

"Not really."

That was the final straw.

And so, Ness found himself clutching a little piece of paper in the hallway. Like a gnome, he cackled, pinning it to the noticeboard. The perfect prank: spook Lucas just a little bit, then reveal the truth a couple of days later. What could possibly go wrong?

[BY ORDER OF THE HIGH APPENDAGE OF SMASH MANOR]

You fools. You snivelling fools.
The budget is low,
and money is tight,
So take down your bells,
and turn off your lights,
For I must declare, and it brings me such joy,
Christmas is cancelled! for all girls and boys!

A masterful forgery, if he said so himself. But Ness didn't notice the slight glow of magic, which rippled when he stuck the paper down. He didn't notice the five-fingered menace, lurking out of sight in the hallway. Nobody noticed when, in the middle of the night, Crazy Hand took glee in defenestrating every chocolate from every single advent calendar.

And by the morning, everyone had noticed that Christmas was cancelled, and the spirit of the Manor had been torn from its roots. By the time Ness woke up, it was far too late, and there was nothing to be done; the notice had stuck fast to the board, his silly little prank had become law. And when Lucas saw the ruined lounge and cried, actually cried, Ness knew he could never say anything of it, at least until January.

No, he'd just have to see this one out. He'd just have to let this one go. He'd just have to watch it back, on repeat, in reverse, his own festive movie called That Time Ness Cancelled Christmas.

"And that's what happened," said Ness, kneeling next to Lucas with a million plasters and a mess of a first aid kit. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Will you ever forgive me?"