Dark circles accented Stan's cobalt blue eyes the next morning. Kyle took one look at his friend and felt awful. "You look like total shit," he surmised. Despite this Stan grinned, insane happiness curving his mouth into a grin that would make The Joker proud.

"Kyle! You're here!" he exclaimed, throwing his arms around his friend and hugging him. The hug was awkwardly returned.

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?"

Kyle realized his folly when Stan's face fell and worry darkened his features. "Because of yesterday…" he whispered. "You do remember what happened, right…" At Kyle's flinch, Stan quickly changed the subject, "I tried texting and calling you last night after I went home but I never got a response. Thought you'd be home today for sure."

Kyle frowned, fishing his phone out of his bookbag. He was notorious for forgetting his phone in his book bag or locker so this wouldn't have been the first time he hadn't responded to texts or calls. He finally found it and pulled it out. Stan got closer to see it. "It's dead," Kyle explained, showing him the blank screen. "I'll charge it later."

Stan nodded. "I'm just so happy you're here. I was really worried after yesterday."

Kyle was quiet for a moment debating whether he wanted to convince his best friend of the truth or grant Kenny his request. He gave into the latter; after all, there was no way Stan would be able to convince him if their situations were reversed. "I'm sorry I made you worry," he apologized. "And I'm fine. I think there was something in my food yesterday or maybe Cartman snuck something into my drink."

Stan shook his head, eyes narrowing, and voice seething. "I should have known, that fucking asshole, I'll kill him."

"Stan, it's fine, really," Kyle said quickly, belatedly realizing the excuse was weak and not fair to Cartman. "I took care of it, we talked it out and all that jazz. I'm good, dude."

"You and Cartman talked things out?" Stan asked incredulously. Surely, he had misheard.

"Yeah."

"Okay." Disbelief practically dripped off the word.

They both got what they needed out of the locker and Kyle shut it. He started walking away but realized his friend wasn't following. He stopped and gave Stan a questioning look. Stan shook his head again.

"Kyle. We really need to talk about this. I don't think Cartman's been putting stuff in your drinks since school started. You avoid us at lunch all the time."

Kyle sighed, he should have known he wouldn't be let off the hook so easily. "Can we talk about it some other time Stan? When we're not here at school."

Stan looked up and down the hall, noting that the halls were thinning out as it was getting closer to the final bell to ring. "We could just skip class and you could tell me."

"Dude. I'm not cutting class," Kyle said as if Stan had just asked him to willingly amputate a limb from his body. "Not today." The disappointment was clear in his friend's eyes. Kyle knew Stan wouldn't like what was coming next but he forged on. Might as well get it out of the way now. "I'm not eating lunch with you all today either." Kenny and Cartman might have attempted to clear things up last night, but Kyle was more confused than he'd ever been.

Stan was crestfallen. "Are you going to eat lunch with us again at all? This isn't going to turn into the whole year is it, you avoiding us at lunch?" Was it possible that Cartman had been sneaking stuff in his friend's drinks since the start of the year? It sure seemed unlikely but Stan was starting to latch onto the idea since he wasn't being given anything else to help make sense of things. Or maybe it had just been yesterday and that's why Kyle had flipped his shit at lunch.

"I'm not avoiding everybody," Kyle pointed out. He was really just avoiding Kenny. And, at this point, Cartman. Last night's conversation had certainly been illuminating.

"Will you talk to Kenny again? At all?"

"Of course I will. I just don't know when."

Stan allowed a small smile. "Good! That'll be good for both of you. I can tell Kenny today at lunch." Kyle's chest tightened at this but not with panic, instead with grief. Stan really cared for Kenny, possibly more, even if he didn't realize it. But how could Stan get much closer to someone like Kenny? Someone who died practically all the time but people didn't remember the event. It would have been hard enough without adding that unique factor to it.

Stan would be good for Kenny, Kyle had no doubt about that, he did question how good Kenny would be for Stan, though. And that made his chest twist in pain because he understood now. He understood some of what Kenny must be thinking and why he was staying at an arm's length.

"Yes, please tell him," Kyle encouraged while a million different thoughts raced through his mind threatening to blurt out Kenny's secret again. He could already feel guilt settling in the pit of his stomach. It was hard to breathe, he remembered how much Stan wanted to save their friend and realized his best friend had likely lost that battle before it even began. The feel-good drag was in full swing here. "I'll see you later, Stan," Kyle said in parting. He was ready to leave and forget this part of his life, calculus was much more inviting and safe.

"See ya later," Stan replied, moving in the opposite direction. Kyle debated following him or not. He was sure he was on his way to Cartman and Kenny's locker. Just as he was sure Stan would get all over Cartman's case because of his lame excuse, but Kyle was in no mood to try to assure Stan and besides Kenny would be there.

More guilt panged at him as it was his fault that his best friend would likely do something stupid, but his thoughts were racing with other things he wanted to get accomplished before the bell rang. Stan didn't know about the whole zombie thing so he wouldn't be able to relate to the fear Kyle had. Shame colored his cheeks for a brief moment as he realized he truly was afraid of their friend now. He walked in the direction of a specific classroom.

After his chat with Kenny and Cartman, he had decided he was going to do a little research on cults and he knew one other person that loved research as much as him. He entered the homeroom he knew she had and easily spotted out the loose, thick braid that Wendy was known for.

She glanced up at him from her desk surprised to see Kyle as he approached. She raised her brows, clearly confused. "Kyle, I know we have almost every class together because of AP but we don't have homeroom together." She hoped he was just picking up Stan's spaciness by association.

Kyle grinned. "I know. I wanted to ask if you would mind helping me with a project after school." He lowered his voice. "But don't tell anyone."

Wendy frowned. "What's the project and why can't anyone know?"

"There's just a couple people I don't want to know."

"Kenny and Stan?" she guessed.

"Uh," Kyle paused. Really it was Kenny and Cartman but he supposed he didn't want Stan catching wind of this either. "Close enough."

"Okay. Why didn't you just ask me in a class we have together later?" Her brows furrowed as her friend was not acting like himself.

"I wanted to catch you before you heard about my lunch yesterday." He knew she had been tutoring so likely not in the cafeteria when he had put his histrionics on display for everyone.

"You know I also have friends that eat in the cafeteria, Kyle," she pointed out.

"So you already heard?"

"I got the gist of it, yeah. I'll let you tell me more later though. Bell's about to ring."

That sounded like a yes but he wanted to be sure. "Are you going to help out after school?"

"Like you even needed to ask."

Kyle smiled again, relieved. "Thanks!" He left ignoring the fact that Wendy was giving him the same odd look he had been giving Stan since school started back up.

Ω

Stan angrily made his way down the hallway seething at Kyle's earlier admission that Cartman had put something in his friend's drink to make him act all crazy yesterday at lunch. There was still that voice in Stan's head that said it really didn't make sense if he thought on it long enough. Kyle himself had basically said it didn't make sense, too!

He didn't care, though, he was just glad he had someone to take all this anger and confusion out on. Cartman and Kenny were both at the locker. Stan rushed right at Cartman and pushed him up against the locker surprising not only his two friends but himself as well.

"What the fuck, Cartman?" Stan snarled.

"Yeah, what the fuck?!" was the response. Kenny gaped, unsure what to do.

"Kyle told me what happened." Cartman was stunned. Kenny was torn between stunned, angry, and hurt.

"He…did?" Cartman questioned, honestly surprised Kyle would have said anything so soon.

"Yeah, I know you spiked his drink with something to make him hallucinate."

"What?!"

"Huh?" Even Kenny was stunned into involuntary speech at the shoddiness of Kyle's cover story.

Stan glared at Cartman. "Don't what me. I knew you did something, asshole!"

By now, some other students had decided to stop and stare while others simply ignored the commotion and went about their business. Cartman struggled in Stan's grip, starting to have trouble breathing. "Of course that Jew would say I did that, fucking daywalker would blame me for his insanity," he managed to get out in a strained whisper, glaring defiantly at his captor. He tried to kick at Stan but was unsuccessful.

Stan saw red and punched his friend, still keeping him pinned up against the locker. A couple of students started chanting, "Fight, fight!" The sound of more voices wakened Kenny out of his stupor and he hurried to assist his locker buddy. Both of Stan's hands were around Cartman's neck by now and they tightened around him.

"Stan!" Kenny exclaimed loudly. "You're choking him!" Cartman's face had started to turn a disturbing shade of purple. The red in Stan's vision softened as Kenny's voice cut through it again. "Stan! Stop!" When the red finally fell away Stan was embarrassed and ashamed to realize Kenny was attempting to pry his hands away from Cartman's neck.

A few other students had stayed for the show but simply watched, waiting to see what would happen next. Stan's hands fell away from Cartman and back by his side. Cartman coughed and bent over gasping for breath. Kenny held him steady with a hand on the back and Stan just stared in disbelief. He backpedaled from the other two backing right into a student that had stayed to watch. Stan spun around and sputtered a quick apology before rushing away. Kenny called for him again but Stan ignored him.

He raced down the stairs feeling his heart beat fast. What had he been thinking? He wasn't even drunk. Yes, he had been upset but Kyle had said they had worked things out and everything was fine. Still, Stan couldn't believe that Kyle would just talk things out with Eric Cartman. He was leaving, heading towards an exit door when a hand landed on his shoulder.

"Going somewhere?"

Stan's heart sank at the sound of Craig's voice. Why was Craig always just randomly popping up anyway, Stan thought annoyed. He waved the hand away. "Yes, home."

"Why?"

"I hit Cartman. And was choking him."

"What did he do to deserve that?"

Stan paused for a second, not sure he wanted to explain but did anyway. Maybe Craig could help him figure things out. "He spiked Kyle's drink or something and that's why he was so weird yesterday at lunch."

Craig raised an eyebrow. "Did he?" he asked skeptically. "Did Kyle say this?"

"Yeah," Stan confirmed. It was weird, he knew it. Craig wasn't buying it either.

Craig shook his head. "You know we need to get to class."

Stan stared at him sure he had heard him wrong. "I'm leaving. I was just hitting Cartman and choking him. He was turning purple, Kenny had to make me let go of him."

"I think you're staying," Craig said, looking at something beyond Stan. Stan turned around to see what Craig was looking at. Kenny was there gasping for breath, clearly having hurried to catch up with Stan.

"Stan? Stan, are you okay?" he asked between breaths.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Is Cartman okay?"

"He'll be okay," Kenny assured him. Stan looked at him confused.

"Why are you here? Shouldn't you be with Cartman? He's the one who got hurt."

Kenny looked at him, sky blue eyes flashing with concern. "I thought you might leave and I didn't think it would be good for you to be alone after that." Stan's body filled with something he couldn't name but he knew it felt good. He couldn't find any words. Craig realized that Stan had been stunned into silence so quickly spoke up before the air became too tense.

"That was kind of you, Kenny," he said sincerely. Kenny glanced up at Craig just realizing there was another person with them. "So Cartman is going to make it after all. Stan was pretty worried. He was on his way out the door."

Kenny looked back over at Stan, worried. "Stan? Are you leaving?" Stan locked eyes with his friend in the orange parka. Concerned blue eyes peered at him through blonde strands and Stan's breath caught in his throat, words dying on his lips. Why did he suddenly feel like puking?

"Stan?" Craig also prompted when Stan made no reply. Stan wanted to choke Craig now. Couldn't he get some air?

"I just, I just need some air," he voiced, finally able to push words through his lips.

"Okay," Kenny said agreeably. "I'll go with you." He glanced back at Craig who nodded in approval.

"See you two later," Craig waved before turning to go to his class. He figured Stan probably wouldn't make the period. Kenny and Stan were both quiet and Kenny waited a couple of minutes before realizing Stan wasn't planning to move.

"Stan?" He asked again growing more concerned. When Stan made no response, Kenny grabbed his hand and pulled him to one of the exit doors. It was the same one Stan had used during one of the first lunches when Cartman had drawn attention to Kenny's eating habits or lack thereof.

Fresh air hit Stan's face and he instantly felt better and grounded again. He allowed Kenny to keep pulling him, curious as to where he was being taken. He smiled when he realized he was being led to the same place he had once led Kenny to during the lunch Butters had first offered up his food container.

Kenny finally stopped and turned to look at him. "Are you okay?" Those concerned baby blues were looking over him again and Stan was finding it hard to speak, his mouth not cooperating with the task of forming words.

"I- I'm fine," Stan attempted to reassure him. "I'm sorry that I… lost it." Kenny's mouth curved into a big smile and Stan thought his heart was going to stop.

"I think everyone knows not to mess with Kyle now," he said good-humouredly.

Stan allowed for a small smile. "Yeah, otherwise I'm coming for ya," he tried to laugh but couldn't. Kenny's smile dropped and Stan's heart did, too. He had wanted to try to keep that smile there a little longer, but Kenny must have picked up that Stan was still upset.

"Eric's fine, Stan," Kenny tried to reassure him again. Stan shook his head.

"He didn't spike any of Kyle's drinks, did he?" The words were flat.

"I can't say for sure that he never has, but as far as I know, he didn't spike anything recently."

"Kyle's losing his mind," Stan whispered looking ahead at the horizon through the trees. "I thought it was me losing my mind but I somehow didn't see it. My best friend is actually losing his mind."

Kenny shifted his weight uncomfortably, at a loss for words. He had always wanted other people to know about his recurring deaths but had never imagined it playing it out this way. He had no idea why Kyle suddenly knew, just as he had no idea why Eric Cartman knew.

According to Kyle, he had just started remembering the deaths about a month ago. And his poor best friend stood here worrying over his state of mental health. Words were racing through Kenny's mind, formulating sentences and discarding ones that he thought might not help. What could he possibly say?

"At least he doesn't think he's dying," Kenny offered weakly and immediately regretted it. That was definitely a sentence his mind had been in the process of discarding, but his mouth had just opened up and blurted those words right out.

Stan was even more horrified than he had been when they first left the school building. "Let's hope it never gets that bad. He might think he can come back to life and just live on the edge all the time." The blonde next to him stiffened at the words realizing Stan had hit the nail on the head. He lived on the edge every day because he knew he would come back to life; maybe that was just part of the deal that his parents had made within the cult.

"No, no," Kenny rushed to correct himself. "I'm sure that will never happen, Stan. I was just trying to cheer you up. It was stupid."

"I wish it was stupid," Stan said. "It's definitely not out of the question though." He looked at his friend and smiled. He watched as Kenny smiled back and Stan realized that Kyle might be losing his grip on reality, but he was right about one thing: Kenny did light up around him.

How had he not noticed before? Was he really lighting up the way Kenny was right now like Kyle had said? Stan didn't think Kyle would lie to him but he also thought he wasn't crazy until recently. While Kenny struggled to find another way to comfort the brooding boy next to him, Stan used his peripheral vision to really check him out.

He knew his body had been doing things around his long- lost friend, but he had shrugged it off as hormones. He started to reach out and grab the other's hand but stopped and let his hand fall back to his side. He could hear Kyle's voice in his mind again warning him not to push too far or too much. Besides, he couldn't assume Kenny was lighting up just for him, maybe the guy lit up for other people, too. It's not like Kyle was with the guy every second of the day to know he only lit up for Stan like this.

Kenny noticed Stan reach his hand out before it fell back to his side. Without a second thought, he grabbed the hand and squeezed it reassuringly as Stan had done for him before. "Kyle will be fine, Stan," he reassured.

Stan almost laughed. He had finally stopped worrying about Kyle for two seconds just to be back there again. He squeezed the hand back gratefully. I think I might be…. is this… As if fearful of the word itself, his mind refused to supply a particular word to any of this thoughts.

"Do you feel better, Stan?" Kenny asked hopefully. "Now that you got 'some air?'"

Stan grinned, not missing how eager the other both looked and sounded. "Yes, I do. Thank you." Kenny positively glowed and Stan felt a fool that he had never noticed what Kyle had. How many others had?

"Are you okay to go back in?"

Stan sighed and nodded. "Yes, guess I gotta face the music sooner or later." The sooner they got back in the building maybe he could get rid of the urge to reach out and kiss him. Kenny really hadn't been around that long yet and clearly still needed to work some things out with himself. They held hands until they were back in the school.

Kenny started to say goodbye but Stan insisted on making sure he got to his class okay. Kenny tried to point out that he should be the one making sure Stan made it to class okay as he was the one who had walked right into an ambush before. However, Kenny was still the one that was escorted at Stan's insistence. Although things had let up, Stan was not going to give anyone with ill intent the chance to encounter Kenny alone in the halls.