I wondered momentarily if he was expecting me to tell him I was giving everyone massages. Which it might be true, if only he thought I was massaging lower.
"I have been Alpha ordered to have sex with each member of the pack"
It was a long pause. Then Seths lips met mine. Each second I felt like my heart was becoming full in a way it had never been.
"Let me know how I can help" Seth smiled down at me.
Chapter 14: Unspecified Truth
As Always Happy Reading!
I cuddled into Seth's side, the rest of the picnic forgotten. Each of us too happy to be next to each other to even suggest breaking contact. I pulled myself closer into his side. Seth wrapped his arm around my back, pulling me closer to his side.
Occasionally, he would take a break from looking at the stars to breath me in and kiss the top of my head. I could feel a blush rising to my cheeks when he would kiss me. It was a different kiss than I had ever experienced before.
Time passed too fast without my permission. Each moment was held in perfect bliss. I loved it. If I could live in a moment, this would be one of my top ones. I wanted to offer more to Seth, yet, I knew this is exactly what he wanted from today.
Unlike the others in the pack, Seth did not expect more. Even though I came on our date with easy access pants, Seth did not make any move to have more than cuddling under the stars.
The chill night air was interrupted with the sound of chiming. Seth leaned over to his side, fishing out his phone. I watched as he turned off the alarm. I groaned into his side, not wanting this date to be over. It was too much fun to relax with Seth.
I felt his deep laughter before I heard its musical tones. He gently stroked my head, brushing my hair away from my face, slowly trying to encourage me to detangle myself from our cuddle. I did not want to, though. This was an amazing cuddle. I loved every moment of his warmth and kindness.
I didn't protest as Seth stood up, holding his hands down to me. At the thought of getting up, I felt the full extent of my exhaustion. I was not ready to move. Even if it meant sleeping in the woods, I would be fully willing to do that tonight.
"Did I make you sleepy?" Seth smiled down at me.
I reached my arm up, taking his hand. Seth hoisted me into the air. Holding me against his chest, I took the opportunity to wrap my legs around him. I needed him to be close for a moment longer. Seth held me in his arms as he began to walk back to the trail.
"What about the blankets?" I yawned against his neck.
Seth laughed, "I will pick them up later." He took every opportunity to kiss the top of my head.
"Okay. You didn't make me sleepy. I was just comfortable and… Yeah…" I yawned again.
Seth kissed my hair "I like making you feel safe."
I melted into his body, looking over his shoulder as our private star watching picnic disappeared behind us. It looked magical even shrouded in darkness. The warmth of Seth kept the chill away.
I wanted him in my bed tonight, I thought as I enjoyed the natural sway in his step as he carried me back to the truck.
We arrived there too soon. I felt Seth open the passenger door. He lifted me into the seat like I weighed nothing. I shimmied into the middle seat before Seth could finish buckling me in. His deep laugh sounded as he changed seatbelts, buckling me into the centre seat.
It felt like he was only gone momentarily before reappearing in the drivers seat. He buckled himself in, then wrapped his arm around me. He pulled me into his side. I relaxed into him, sucking in all the warmth I could.
I tried to keep my eyes open for as long as I could. My body felt safe and protected. It was almost like I had a protector looking out for me. I wanted to keep this feeling forever. Watching the forest blurring past the truck, I saw a grey wolf with black spots running alongside us. In my tired state, I couldn't place who that wolf was. All I knew was that they made me feel safe by being close.
"Seth, do you want to stay with me tonight?" I could hear the exhaustion in my voice now. Seth would know that coming up after a date was not necessarily for fun times. At least, I hoped. I was not feeling awake enough to put on a good performance.
"I would love to, if I wasn't going on patrol after I drop you off. That is the only reason I didn't say a later time to Charlie. I think a full night date with you would be fun" Seth smiled at me.
"Okay. I guess I will live" I tried to keep the disappointment out of my voice. I did not want him to leave me. Not yet, not when I had felt so safe and secure.
"Sorry hon. Anyone you want me to call for you?" Seth offered.
"You are offering to get me someone to share my bed with?" I asked, a bit shocked. It was not like the wolves haven't done something like this for me before. Seth had just been too young to be added to the list of people that I had fun with. It would not be the weirdest, yet, I felt my bodies exhaustion. There was only three people that slept beside me when I was this tired.
Two of them wolves, the other one forcibly entered my home night after night. Between my two wolf options, one was on a chain. The other I would call when I got back home anyway. No need for Seth to run between potentials for the night.
"So, about Jakes order…" Seth spoke softly as to not scare me.
"Yeah?"
"Who are you going to do first?" Seth asked.
I thought about it for a moment. I wasn't sure I wanted to do Seth in any particular spot. It would be his fist time having sex. Not something I wanted to categorize on a list. Like "oh, sorry Seth, you have to wait for me to have a foursome with these men first. Then it will be your turn." I rolled my eyes at the thought of that.
"I am not sure. I was thinking, as long as the pack knows my order, then whenever they wanted to." I shrugged.
"So, if I said I wanted to?" I could hear his intense swallow.
"I would say we could. Though, it is your first time, right?" I asked
Seth nodded.
"Then, let's plan to live in the moment. When you are ready, let me know okay?" I kissed his side.
I could feel the tension falling from his shoulders. Silly kid, did he think I would jump him tonight. To be fair I wasn't wearing underwear. So maybe he had a point to be worried.
"Bella, I haven't…" Seth started. He paused like he was trying to figure out how he would phrase it. I waited for him to say anything he needed to in his own time. In the past, I had been pressured and it never felt good.
"I guess. I mean, I know…" Seth stammered. We stopped at a the only red light in Forks. Seth turned in his seat looking me in the eyes. "Bella, I am a virgin." He said it like a decoration.
Looking at the lights, I made sure they were still red. Not that anyone would have road rage if we took longer at this light. Holding Seths face with my hands, I saw the vulnerability in his eyes. The innocence within him burned down to me.
"Seth, you will pick all the speeds for what happens between us. Please know that I think you are perfect, no matter what about you changes" I smiled at him.
Seth pressed his lips against mine. All the worry about the date gone from his touch. Just as we became washed in green light. I laughed slightly as Seth finished the drive to my front door.
I unbuckled my seatbelt. Sadness overwhelmed me as I thought of sleeping alone tonight. Especially after such an enjoyable date with Seth.
Seth climbed out of the truck. I scooted over to the driver's side. No need for him to walk to the other side to help me out, I can sneak out the same door as him. Seth scooped me into his arms, holding me close for a long moment. I clung to him, happy he asked me out. It was a nice change from my usual fuck parties and sex in the woods.
Eventually, Seth had to put me down. My feet ached against the gravel driveway. He walked with me all the way to the door. I smiled at the thought that he was raised right. Knowing that, if I was a boy I wouldn't have been. I would have been the same as I was now. Many partners, no love. It saddened my heart to realize that.
Seth pulled me into his arms, whispering in my ear "Thank you for the unforgettable date."
"Thank you for the amazing date Seth" I smiled up at him, not missing the opportunity to take his mouth against mine once more.
The front door opened as we kissed. I saw the reflection of yellow light in Seths eyes as he broke the kiss. Clearing his throat, he smiled at Charlie.
"Welcome home Bella" Charlie smiled at me.
I smiled back. "See you soon, okay Seth? Thanks again for a wonderful night"
"See you soon" Seth didn't let Charlie's interruption ruin our date.
I stepped inside the house. Charlie shut the front door as I passed. Quickly, I ran to the front window, checking to see Seth leave. He gave me an enthusiastic wave before driving away.
"How was your date?" Charlie asked. He was leaning against the kitchen countertop. I could tell from his expression that he was amped up about something.
"It was really nice. Sue actually made us a homemade cake." I couldn't wipe the smile off my face.
"Oh, you went over to Sue's?" Charlie asked.
"No. We had a picnic. She made a cake for us though. Have you seen Sue recently?" I asked. They had been more than friends when I was in high school. After Seth's dad passed.
"No. I haven't really been with anyone since you went off to school" Charlie admitted.
"Sorry to hear that" I smiled at him, exhaustion hitting my body. This would be the perfect time to make a move. My body, however, was betraying me.
"Yeah. If you know of anyone who needs a good romp, let me know" Charlie looked at me with intense fuck-me eyes. My mouth went dry with the thought.
"Anyone?" I questioned. I could feel the taboo longing hitch up in my chest.
"Anyone" Charlie smiled, walking towards his lounger.
"I will keep that in mind. I better go to bed though. Working at the store tomorrow" I bit my lip to keep me from jumping him right then and there.
"Have a good sleep" Charlie smiled a playful smile. I could tell he wanted to say something else.
Walking to the stairs I stepped on the first one when Charlie called to me.
"Bella"
"Yeah Charlie?" I called back.
"Do you always choose to go commando?"
I blushed. "Not always. Sometimes I make them work for it" I teased him.
I heard Charlies tenor laugh as a response.
My phone rang in my pocket.
"Hello?"
"Hi my gorgeous girl. How are you doing at Charlie's?" Renee asked.
"Good. Everything is good" I told her. Not wanting to express how badly I wanted the man downstairs.
"Staying away from the Fire Parties, I hope" Renee teased.
"Mom. Like I would stay away from them. Would I be allowed to be your daughter if I did?" I teased.
"Well, you are a product of the fire, so it must feel like coming home when you go" Renee laughed.
"What?"
"Oh honey. Haven't I told you?" Renee laughed. I could tell she was drinking.
"You conceived me at a party?" I clarified.
"I was lucky Charlie was a good boyfriend at the time. He offered to marry me when I found out I was pregnant with you. But, well, you know how our marriage lasted. Anyway, I am proud of that man for sticking with his promise to help me." Renee sighed.
"What are you saying, Mom?" I needed to hear it from her.
"Charlie is not your biological father. I wanted to tell you. Never felt brave enough until now. With Fernando as my lover, he is giving me the courage to do things I never thought I would be able to do" Renee made a kissy noise.
Charlie was not my dad. He only stepped up because Mom didn't know who it was.
"Who do you think my dad is?" I begged her. I knew Charlie was taboo, but someone I don't know. What if…? I shook my head. I didn't know if I did.
"Oh, don't worry about it honey. He didn't want us. Live your life." Renee sounded distracted. She started moaning "Sorry honey, I have to go, Fernando is hungry"
I hung up without saying goodbye. My feelings had been a shameful part of my existence. Now, he was not my father, but my mom's friend?
Walking into my room, I wanted to chastise myself for how I was feeling. It was so easy to flirt with Charlie. It was not like he raised me. I only came here as a teenager. Even then, Charlie is my mother's ex-husband. Someone who always taught me like a father would, yet, he was biologically not my dad. He was not my dad. I repeated over and over again.
Renee did not know who my dad was. She had been dating Charlie when they came home from a Forks bush party, and she found out she was pregnant. Charlie stepped up, but, I am not his kid.
I shook that thought out of my brain. I needed to not focus on the one person who provided me stability and safety when Renee was unable to. I knew I could sleep around and Charlie would not judge me. If I ever came home pregnant, Charlie would support me and the baby. Was it so wrong to feel need towards the person that provided me with everything that a partner would?
He was just my mom's ex that I spent time with when she was off doing extensive porn shoots. So what if the town considered him a parental figure? He had never had filled that role. He was something else. Potentially something more, if I wanted it. Sure, I had called him Dad growing up. That was out of longing to have a man that gave a shit about me. Now, it was clear that I didn't need a dad when I had Charlie to care for me.
Tossing my phone on my bed, I started getting ready for sleep. I slowly stripped off my shirt and top, enjoying the feeling of my breasts not being strapped in. Opening the top of my dresser, I pulled out an oversized shirt. I did not know which wolf gave it to me, but it was my favourite sleeping shirt. I wore it constantly during my school year. I sat up in bed, not ready to sleep yet. Too excited about the day.
I heard Charlie's door open and shut. Within a matter of minutes his even breathing picked up in the other room. Charlie had stayed up just for me. Now he was sleeping.
Opening my phone, I texted the one person who would not judge me.
Sent: Can you please come over. I will open my window.
Before I received their response, I jumped out of bed, opening my window wide. It squeaked horribly. Pausing, I listened to Charlies breathing. It stayed stable and consistent.
Climbing back into bed, I knew I couldn't get up again. If I did, I would wake Charlie up and ask him for the story of how I got here. Probably not the question Charlie wants in the middle of the night.
I closed my eyes, letting the tears drip down my face. If I had known this earlier, I would have not felt the shame and fear that I had. Sure, the age gap was big, but Charlie was not my dad. I felt my stomach roll as I worried who my dad was.
Warm arms wrapped around me. I felt loved and safe again. I let him pull me into bed, hugging me under the covers until I stopped crying.
"Sorry." I mumbled.
"You have nothing to be sorry about" Embry kissed my forehead.
"Renee just dropped a bomb on me"
"When does Renee not drop bombs on you?" Embry tried to make light of the situation.
"Charlie is not my dad" I whispered.
"No? Then who?" He sounded just as shocked as I did.
"She doesn't remember. Renee was very drunk when she called. Then she hung up without answering all my questions because her new fling wanted some fun." I buried my face in Embry's chest.
"We can find out, if you would like" Embry offered.
"Embry. What if I have…" I couldn't say it.
"You haven't" Embry guaranteed.
"How do you know?" I asked. My breathing started to hiccup.
Embry rubbed my back, holding me tight as I worked through my emotions. I felt so loved in his arms.
"Its a wolf thing. Families all smell the same. I wondered about Charlie, but figured it was like adoption, or IVF, or something like that. I promise I would have told you if you did not seem like you knew. I did not know you did not know" Embry kissed the top of my head, holding me tighter as I cried.
"Can you please vet anyone I sleep with? Does that nose work on siblings?" My stomach turned. I was into taboo when I knew what I was walking into. This was something else.
"For you, I will. How was your date?" Embry held me closer. I tossed my leg over him as I thought about what to say.
"It was amazing. I forgot how much I liked dates. It has been a while since a date did not remind me of, well, you know." I felt my fear spike at the thought of him.
"I am so glad you said yes. I want you to be happy" Embry kissed me.
"I will be happy. I think." I sounded unsure.
My eyes drifted closed in exhaustion. Embry's arms around me made me feel safe and loved. With him here, all memories of my past fear in this room washed away from my brain. As long as Embry stayed.
"I will make it my goal in life for you to be happy" Embry kissed the top of my head. "Sleep well beautiful"
"Will you stay the night?" I panicked, holding him close.
"You will have to kick me out, before I willingly leave our cuddles" Embry sounded happier than he had in a while.
His hand rubbed up and down my back holding me safe and warm. Sleep found me easily. I woke with my body perfectly stretched against Embry's body. I forgot how much I love waking with him. Unlike with Seth, we were not a tangle of limbs, but one organism.
"Morning Beautiful" Embry yawned as he spoke.
"Morning Em" I stretched against him.
"Ready to face the day?" Embry asked.
"Maybe." I buried myself into Embry's chest. Wanting more love and cuddles from my best friend.
"Are you doing anything today?"
"I work"
"When?" Embry seemed to wake up a bit more as he asked.
"10. Don't worry, I never sleep past 9" I told him, trying to get him to cuddle me more.
"Bella, honey." Embry kissed the top of my head. "Its 9:45"
I shot out of bed, leaving Embry under the covers. I quickly put underwear on, grabbing jeans and a t-shirt. Tossing it all on, realizing that if I don't get out of the house within five minutes I would be late.
My phone chimed on the nightstand. It was plugged in. Embry must have done that after I fell asleep.
"Thanks for plugging in my phone" I smiled at Embry. Who was now sitting up in my bed. Shirtless, but his hips were covered with my blanket. Embry simply nodded. Almost like he was speechless.
Looking at my phone, there was a text from Mike: Hey Pretty Lady I am outside. With coffee.
A happy noise escaped my mouth.
"Good text?" Embry smiled at me.
"Yup. My ride to work is here and he brought coffee" I jumped on my bed landing in Embry's arms. He held me laughing. For a moment, all I wanted to do was pull him in and kiss him. I bit my lip. I couldn't kiss Embry. If I did, I could lose my best friend. I needed Embry in my life. Come on, lustful pussy, you will not ruin this connection we have.
"You better go" Embry smiled at me. It was like he knew exactly what I was feeling. I nodded. Detangling myself from Embry, I slowly walked to my bedroom door. Grabbing a pair of runners from my collection, I popped them on. I looked at Embry once more, feeling a connection I had always known was there.
Walking down the stairs, I praised myself on not ruining my relationship with Embry. He deserved way better than me. I hoped daily that he would find an amazing imprint. He deserved a perfect girl.
I sprinted to Mike's car as the rain was pouring on me. I forgot in my time away how fast the rain could soak through my shirt. A laughing Mike threw the door open before I made it to the car. I threw myself inside the dry interior and shut the door behind me.
"I didn't hear the rain this morning" I said as I wiped the extra rain off me.
"Are you sick?" Mike asked.
"No. I don't think so, why?" I pulled down he visor to look at my refection in the mirror. I looked the same as I always did. Plane Jane Bella.
"Because the Bella I know, always knows when it is raining. Didn't you try to stay home from school on particularly wet days?" Mike teased as he drove.
"Okay yes. In my defence, I stopped doing that after I stole your rain jacket." I tried to keep a teasing voice.
The real reason I stayed home from school when it was wet was not because I was afraid of the rain. It was after Edward left, and I was afraid to leave the house when vampires wouldn't sparkle. So, I stole Mike's jacket and he picked me up daily, in the beginning to ask for his jacket back. Eventually, it became a routine.
"How is the jacket, anyway?" I asked. I had given it back to him when I left for school. It was hard, I had associated that jacket with a safe trip to school. I went through a painful first few rainy days of university without it. Luckily, on those days Embry would run up and walk me to school.
"The jacket is good. I have gained a lot of muscle, so I don't use it as often anymore. Too tight around the biceps." Mike puckered his lips as he flexed.
I smiled at him. Mike had filled out quite a bit since high school. It was impressive, the wolves only had slightly more muscle than Mike. I found myself relaxing as we drove. It was nice to have a human moment. Nothing shadowed by the supernatural.
I couldn't quite keep my mind from the boy back home in my bed. A night spent with Embry had been like nothing I had experienced before. Part of me wanted to invite him to sleepover again tonight. I could do with another good night spent fully asleep. No nightmares, no fear of vampires appearing in my room.
"You seem antsy" Mike commented as we drove into the garage.
I was antsy. Though, I thought with a good night sleep I wouldn't feel an itch as strongly as I do. I squeezed my legs together to help stop the need. What I needed was some good dick. I looked at Mike. He would be able to scratch this itch. Did I want to set the precedent? Mike picks me up, we fuck, then open the store late. With a final squeeze of my legs, I shook my head.
"Sorry, my mind is a bit distracted" I smiled at Mike.
"Here is your coffee" He said, handing me a cup. "You check the displays, I will set up the register"
I smiled at Mike, following him into the store. Walking the aisles, I tried to ignore the need growing inside me. It was almost an all consuming need. If I didn't get a good fucking, I might go crazy.
I thought of all my options for a good fuck tonight. My knees went weak in the middle of the fishing aisle. It was almost unbearable how much I needed someone to flip me over and fuck me until I passed out.
What the fuck. I have never felt a need like this before. It was like someone slipped me the most potent aphrodisiac. I sat on my ass in the middle of the aisle. Taking a deep sip of my coffee, I needed to get a grip. Holy fuck, did I ever. Crossing my legs, I pulled out my phone.
"Hello"
"Jacob Fucking Black" I hush screamed into the phone.
I heard a deep laugh on the other end of the phone. The same laugh that would get me through the days that I was in a deep depression.
"Tell me why I feel like if I don't sleep with one of the wolves I will go up in flames" I demanded. Not finding my usual ease within the tones of his laughter.
"Have you fucked anyone yet love?" Jacob sounded too casual.
This infuriated me. It was like he did not believe I was about to light up in horny flames. You would think that one would actually care if their friend was going to light on fire.
"What the fuck do you think Black. I haven't come to fuck you yet, now have I?" I found myself losing control over my emotions.
"I wasn't expecting you to run the gamut in this short amount of time. That would practically kill you, anyway." Jacob stopped to chime in some more laughter "Listen, you sound desperate, it is a part of the Alpha order."
"What is part of the Alpha order?" I said between clenched teeth.
"You have been ordered to complete something. You need to be at least trying to complete it or else the order will give you a push" Jacob sounded excited.
"Fuck you Jacob" I spat.
"You wish you could, but I made myself last. Have a good day" Jacob laughed as he hung up the phone.
I needed to get up and moving. This was going to be a long shift.
Authors Note: HAPPY NEW YEAR! I wanted to give you something to read as we wait for 2021 to be over. I am wishing everyone and amazing new year full of skill building and self care. Remember you are always cared for and loved for within the story of Twilight. I am so amazed by the love of this story and the reviews I am receiving. Each and every one of you had a huge impact on my 2021 year. I can not wait to see how this community will impact my 2022 year of writing! Please do tell me what you think of this chapter in the reviews! I love you all and can not wait to create more for you in the coming year!