To say she was nervous was an understatement. "You can do this Lou they are just some firefighters and paramedics you trained side by side with men just like them. You got this!" She had arrived early at the station and sat in her car to try and calm the butterflies in her stomach. Whoever thought of that term didn't expect the butterflies to be the size of pterodactyls. She gave a small huff of a laugh and continued to stare at the station's entrance.


One by one, cars and trucks pulled into the empty parking spaces and the men of Station 51's A-shift walked into the place they would call home for the next 24 hours. She knew that they had been warned that a paramedic only trained person was starting today but she hadn't a clue if they knew she was well, a she. Closing her eyes, she thought of when Kelly Brackett told her where she was being assigned.


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"These men you will be field training with are the best. They were of the first and second paramedic training classes, in fact they were paramedics before the bill even passed." Brackett sat behind his desk evaluating the woman in front of him. She was of average height with blue eyes that bore into you, but the hair was mousy brown with some whites sprigging here and there and well her build was not that of models, if anything she was considered overweight. Shaking the thought from his head he continued, "They, a few years ago, even had a female trained paramedic that shadowed them." She chewed on her lip with a question but didn't want to interrupt. He signaled with his hand for her to go ahead.


"How did that go?" Her eyes lit up ready to drink up any information that he was going to provide. This was very reason he had chosen her for 51's A-shift over other stations that had already had some paramedic only trained individuals, she was as smart as a whip and despite her appearance the firefighters that were training to become paramedics had a hard time keeping up with her physically.


"Well, it was a few years ago, before it was more common for paramedic only training, so it went as well as could be expected." He gave a small smile.


Returning his smile, she supplied the answer, "So not great." She was nervous and he wanted to be frank with her but didn't want to add to it. "Do they know at least I'm a woman?" He shrugged his shoulders.


"I provided them with your information in full along your scores and evaluations from here." He kind of waved about to indicate Rampart's ED.


"Captain Stanley seemed almost excited about it, and they even renovated the station a bit to have a separate locker room. The men know it's for the potential female fire fighters and paramedics, but I don't guess they know when that is exactly going to happen. To answer your previous statement that particular paramedic didn't do so great in the field, but she does great here in the ER." He smiled, "In fact you worked side by side with her during your training, it's Karen."


Her face lit up again this time in confusion and asked, "I thought she was a nurse?" He nodded.


"She is now," he answered, "but it was her love for emergency medicine and the start with the paramedics is what got her there. She would have made a wonderful paramedic book wise, but she was too rigid in several things. I don't think that would be an issue with you."


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A light tapping on her window brought Lou out of her thoughts, she looked up and met eyes with a very tall and skinny man that looked well, worried. "You ok, miss?" She saw by his facial expression that he was making a decision in his head quickly on his next steps based on her answer, she also glanced briefly at the little gold placard on his shirt, surmising by the name, this is the Captain of A-shift. She stepped out of her sedan, while nodding, and flattened the imaginary wrinkles on her clothes before extending her hand for a shake.


"I'm fine, sorry about that, I'm Louise Werner, the new paramedic trainee, you are Captain Stanley." She stated, matter-of-factly. He shook her hand with a quizzical look on


his face and nodded.


"Sure am ma'am, how did you know?" They began to walk toward the station as she answered.


"You have an air of authority about you, and I could see you were about to make a decision on what to do next especially if I told you I wasn't ok." She stopped so he could catch up to her gait, she may had been easily eight inches shorter than him, but she was crossing the spance of the parking lot much quicker than he could have imagined. "Also if you were the other, 'tall skinny man' John Gage, you would have probably started asking for symptoms vs if I was just ok and well, you know, your badge." She smiled at him indicating the nameplate that announce his name.


Duh Hank! He thought as he smiled back. "Very astute," he replied as she pushed open the door to the station and held it open for him to walk through. She took a deep breath and entered behind the Captain and tried to make herself as small as she could, something she had done since she was about six. Her mother's voice echo'ing in her head, being fat doesn't mean you need attention paid to you.


"Men, I would like to introduce you to the new paramedic trainee, Louise Werner." Cap announced and stepped aside. She tried hard not to, but Louise blushed deeply as two shifts of firemen and paramedics stared at her.


"Call me Lou," she started, "very nice to meet all of you." She gave a small wave and while holding up her knapsack she asked, "Where is the locker room for me to change?" Some of the men pointed toward the bay, and she wandered out.


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They all waited to be sure she was far enough away before she became the subject of conversation. "I knew we were getting girls, but you would think they would get some that were at least physically fit!" Chet Kelly exclaimed, "We're gonna have to rescue her if she exerts herself too much!" The other men agreed and began to joke about needing extra money in the grocery budget.


Captain Stanley decided he had enough and interrupted loudly, "All paramedics in the program, whether firefighter and rescue trained or not, pass a physical fitness test and she passed. In fact, she was in top ten of her class and that included men from the department." He glared a bit at the men. "And she can walk like her hair is on fire." he added as an afterthought.


"She also gets changed very quickly and likes her coffee black." Lou announced as she walked in the common room. The group of men looked uncomfortable that she had heard their conversation. "And you can't say anything that I haven't heard before, trust me." She poured a cup of coffee, took a sip and nearly gagged. "Well normally I take it black, but this needs help." She opened the fridge and poured a bit of milk in the inky drink and took another sip. "Bit better." She smiled around her mug as the men just continued to stare at her and made the joke that usually broke the ice when she noticed unwanted attention. "You know if you stare harder at me, I might do a trick!" she quipped. The men quickly looked away and started finding other things very interesting like the grain of the table or the imaginary strings on their pants legs, but were still painfully silent. Determined to break the ice she sidled up alongside a blonde man of stocky build and extended her hand to him.


"You must be Roy Desoto, senior paramedic." she stated simply as she shook his hand


"Well yes I am and this," he replied and gestured at his partner, "is Johnny, my... well, our partner." She extended her hand to him as well which was briefly and limply shaken by the silent man.


Ok then, he does NOT like me. She thought to herself as he wore a half scowl.


"And what do I call the rest of you?" she waved her hand around as she asked, "Because 'hey you or firefighter man' doesn't seem right. I know your badges tell me but, use your words." she chuckled and finally the ice broke, the men of both shifts introduced themselves and what shift they worked so she knew who was staying or going. When Chet introduced himself, she grinned and whispered, "I promise you won't have to rescue me." He stuttered a bit and became super interested in the badge pinned to his shirt, she laughed again.


Hank cleared his throat while looking at his watch and announced, "Roll call gentlemen," he looked at his crew and amended "And lady." The C-Shift crew took that as their dismissal while A-Shift walked toward the garage and lined up at the rig. To her credit she hadn't forgotten the rules and regulations of the fire department and the certain procedures she would still do although she never went through the academy. Stanley and the rest of the men were surprised that she knew exactly where and how to stand but the surprise was short lived as the tones in the station sounded out.


"Squad 51, cardiac case, 679 Winchester Boulevard, 6-7-9 Winchester Boulevard." Sam Lanier's voice said over the loud speaker.


Roy took the proffered slip from his captain before jumping in the driver's side as John and Lou piled in the passenger side with her sandwiched between them.


"Squad 51, KMG 365." acknowledged Hank on the mic as he watched the squad pull away, "good luck." He murmured to his self.


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Chet busied himself with hanging hose knowing that soon Marco would join him once he had finished prepping lunch. Why such an ugly broad? He thought. She already has grey hair for god's sake. When the captain told him that she was only 24 years old, he was shocked. How can a 24-year-old have grey hair? Kelly continued to muse to himself, hanging hose under the hot California sun while Marco joined him. "Oh hey Marco. What do you think, the new chick?" he asked and made a disgusted face to express how he felt about Louise.


"I don't know what to think," Marco shrugged his shoulders with his answer, "Literally met her for fifteen minutes and then they were called to that run. She does have a weird sense of humor though."


"She's got grey hair." The Irishman spat the word as if it were a curse. "Not to mention she's fat." Marco shrugged again.


"I think the preferred term is curvy now and days." Marco continued as he helped his friend hang hose, "And like cap said she had to pass the physical fitness exam like all of us."


"You know it had to be modified, man! She didn't have to wear turn outs and run up flights of stairs or drag a charged hose, she had to probably just do jumping jacks or something." Chet grumbled as he continued with the hot chore. "Just not right hiring a fat chick to do a man's job."


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Captain Stanley sat in his office and worked on the mountain of paperwork that every captain dealt with as his engineer, Mike Stoker, sat at his spot on the couch and filled out his reports on the engine. For the fifth time, is as many minutes, he sighed.


Mike couldn't take it anymore, putting down his paperwork he said, "Ok let me have it."


Always a straight shooter, thought Hank. "How did that Louise strike you?" the Captain asked.


"Lou? Well you know I saw her application just the same as you and on paper she looks really good." he thought a bit before saying, "I just don't know how she is gonna fit in, she seems strange."


"Strange?" Hank asked.


"Yeah, she made those jokes about herself," the engineer shrugged as he relayed this.


"The jokes, hmmmmmmm, to make fun of yourself is a way to defuse things, something tells me she has been defusing things for a long time if she is so quick to the quip." The older man thought to his own teen girls and how his precious Hannah was routinely made fun of because of her braces, but once she started making fun of herself the bullies backed off. "I just hope she does better than that one woman we had." Mike nodded in silent agreement before returning back to his paperwork as Hank did the same.


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Don't throw up, don't throw up, don't throw up. This had been Lou's silent mantra since Roy had pulled out of the station and drove like a bat outta hell. She DID not like riding in the middle she always had this issue as a kid but it had gotten better. Wasn't prepared for a wanna be racecar driver to pilot this thing.


Speaking of "You ok Lou?" Roy asked as he gave her a sidelong glance while she held the dash in front of her paling a bit.


"I get car sick sometimes, I'm fine." she answered and gripped the dash harder, "I will be fine, no worries."


John groaned at this admission, and she couldn't help it but give a self-deprecating smile at his response. "Please don't vomit on my uniform at least." Those were the first words the man has spoken to her, and they were not without a bit of attitude.


"I won't I promise." She mumbled back while continuing her silent mantra. She knew that the dark-haired man was giving his partner looks to communicate how much he DID NOT want to be doing this. "If it's ok," she continued, "the car sickness is not an issue if I ride on a window seat." she looked at him and saw the frown. "But if you are married to that seat I will survive." she added quickly, trying to appease him.


"I'm sure Johnny won't mind, will you?" Roy gave his partner a sidelong long to try and coerce the dar-haired to make this accommodation. A small nod from her right told her that the man had given in.


"Anything to not have to clean up vomit." Was the man's response as Roy pulled the squad up to the address of their call.


"You ok to do this?" Roy asked and patted her shoulder, she nodded and climbed out behind Gage. Quickly she grabbed the O2 canister and IV kit and started up the drive toward the front door. Roy gaped a bit how quickly she was moving and not getting out of breath. "I got the EKG machine, Johnny if you can grab the bio phone." He watched his unusually silent partner grab the phone in a huff and follow the woman who was now inside.


Just as they hit the door, Lou shouted. "He's arresting!" The men hurried in as she gave a precordial thump and started CPR. Roy quickly set up the EKG machine and she paused her compression for a moment to rip open the man's shirt so that the paddles could be placed on the chest.


"V-Fib!" Shouted the senior paramedic, "Defibbing at 400 watts." He flipped the switches as the machine began to charge and then whine to indicate it was ready. "CLEAR!" He depressed the buttons on the paddles and allowed the electricity to course though the man's chest. Lou continued to sit back as the rhythm was checked. "Sinus rhythm." Roy stated with relief, a flurry of activities started.


John started talking to Rampart, Roy was getting a BP, and Lou put an oxygen mask on the patient.


"Rampart this is squad 51 how do you read?" Johnny watched the trainee like a hawk as she prepared an IV. "Rampart, squad 51, how do you read?" While she had prepped an IV she set it aside and assisted Roy with his assessment. Good deal, not a cowboy then. The dark-haired man thought to himself remembering their first trainee.


Joe Early's voice came over the line. "Squad 51, this is Rampart. Read you loud and clear. "


John answered back, "Rampart, squad 51 with cardiac patient, male, approximate age 45. Upon arrival patient was in cardiac arrest after CPR and defibrillation we had a positive conversion to sinus rhythm. Current vitals are as follows, heart rate 43 and irregular, respirations are eight with high flow oxygen applied, BP is ..."


"86/42" Roy supplied as he took his stethoscope from his ears.


Gage nodded and relayed on the phone,"86/42 Rampart. Note patient is diaphoretic and cyanotic, ready for a strip?"


"10-4, 51 send strip now." Dr. Early confirmed.


"This will be lead two." Roy announced as he transmitted the requested information. Out of the corner of his eye though he noticed that Lou was examining the pupils again that he had already checked and feeling the victim's head. "What you got?"


"He's got a lump here, Roy." She said as she was feeling along the patient's right ear, "Must of hit it when he passed out before we got here. Pupils are still equal but sluggish."


The biophone crackled to life with instructions "51, I read sinus bradycardia with occasional PVC's. Start D5W at 100 drips per min and initate second IV for Lidocaine drip at 100 mics per hour, continue high flow O2 and transport as soon as possible." After the doc had finished his instructions, Johnny gave the update about the apparent head injury and change in pupils. "10-4 squad 51 continue with transport and take vitals every 5 min, what is ETA?"


"ETA approximately 15 min." Gage responded.


"10-4, will see you then." The doctor cut off the transmission on his end.


The ambulance attendants arrived with the gurney and with a minimal effort Lou and Roy loaded the patient up and helped roll him out. At this point Lou stopped and paused, technically this was her patient as she was the one who started care but she was also the trainee so she couldn't really ride along yet, even with another paramedic on board, in case something happened. It was deemed there was too much liability to have trainees, in their first month, ride with cases as they were not used to 'bumpy road' medicine. She looked up at Roy who smiled a bit sadly at her and felt John brush past her with a grumbled, "Follow in the squad." After exchanging the equipment in her hands for the squad's key with Roy, she ran off to the end of the drive and waited till the ambulance pulled out and flipped on her lights and sirens as well to be in tune with the ambulance's.


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Lou nervously picked at her fingers as her partners stayed in the treatment room and assisted Dr. Early with the patient. This too was something she couldn't do for at least thirty days, it was so that she could observe the flow of the ED without getting in the way and delaying care. "So how was your first run?" A wide grin split the face of the woman as she looked up at Dixie who asked.


"It was great! The guys were coming in with the equipment when the patient coded, and I started CPR and I found a head injury that wasn't apparent on first assessment. So, they know he's not just a heart case!" She rattled off excitedly. She was so excited that she didn't see Johnny coming up the hall and misconstrued what she was saying as a brag, making a face and huffing the dark-haired man turned on his heel and stomped to the squad.


Dixie knew though that she was just excited, as she had helped train the girl in front of her, and matched her smile. "Not bad for your first call, getting all the action and injuries under your belt, huh?" She patted the excited trainee on the shoulder and walked toward another exam room to check on another patient.


"Ready to go?" Lou spun to see Roy standing in the hall with the handi talkie in his hands. "We better get going while we can, we still have station assignments and Marco is


cooking!"


She raised and eyebrow and asked, "I take it Marco is a good cook?"


"Oh," the man laughed, "He is the best, he even turns down the spice for us gringos." It was Lou's turn to laugh this time.


"Well alright!" She exclaimed as her and Roy climbed into the squad, this time Johnny sandwiched in the middle. "Thank you again for doing this Imma work real hard to get used to riding in the middle, promise." she told the dark-haired man.


"Whatever." was his cold response. A momentary look of hurt passed her face and Roy wore one of confusion.


He was just singing her praises to Early and Brackett about finding that head injury and starting CPR without prompting. Man he just turned it off didn't he. Roy thought before he silently started up the squad and drove back to Station 51.


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Hank heard the squad backing in and not so subtly was watching the three paramedics as they filed out. "How'd it go?" he asked Roy as the passed him, noting that Gage look less than happy and Lou looked downtrodden.


Roy paused to ensure they were in the common room before answering "Really well, actually, she started CPR without prompting, did a second assessment to ensure no injuries since we found him down and alone and found a head injury I missed so they will treat for that as well." Roy sounded like a proud dad as he sung her praises and smiled, "I think we'll start seeing more female paramedics in the future soon." He added, knowing that his Cap had an ulterior motive for his worry, not too long-ago Hank had pulled him aside and asked about paramedic only training age allowances as his daughter, Rebecca, had expressed the want to be a paramedic but didn't know if she wanted to also be a firefighter.


Hank returned the smile, "Hope so pal," He was relieved it went so well because to be honest he didn't want his girls to be firefighters, putting themselves in that kind of danger on the regular. He now understood why his mother was so upset when he joined the academy after his deployment to Korea. While he had fought in a war, he was drafted and really didn't have a choice. But the danger of firefighting he did choose and he had buried many a friend and colleague over the last twenty-three years of his career. "I really hope so."


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Lou's nerves had finally taken the backseat with her first run under her belt. While Johnny seemed irritated that she was with them, Roy's smile as he came into the common room told a different story. She desperately wanted to ask how she did, but she held off knowing that he would tell her in due course.


"Well? How'd it go?" Marco asked.


Marco! thank goodness for nosy coworkers. She smiled at the thought as the man who spoke up gave her an 'I understand' wink. Roy sang praises of her as he described how quick to the gun she was with the equipment and CPR to finding the head injury on the second assessment.


Louise grinned as she got a few slaps on the back and 'Way to go's. The praise was soaked up for just a few min before she was handed the clipboard that held the duty roster. There were a few things she couldn't do or didn't know how to do as she wasn't academy trained so she knew that most shift she would be doing some sort of cleaning. She was tasked with mopping floors throughout the station and tidying her side of the dorms and latrine. The female paramedic set about getting the mop and bucket and starting on her task.


John and Roy were cleaning windows and the common room in companiable silence till the dark haired man broke it. "She was a showboat, Roy, you know that?" Roy looked confused. "Once we were in that room, doing the real work, she was bragging to Dixie about how she started CPR because we were too slow and that you missed the head injury on first assessment."


"But I did miss it on first assessment that is why we do a second if we can, and we could so she found it then." The blonde explained. "And was she showboating or telling Dixie about the run excitedly?" He quirked an eyebrow at his young partner as he continued his wiping down of the window.


"Maybe, but there is still something I can't put my thumb on about her." John sighed, "She's hiding something, Roy."


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She hummed to herself as she set about mopping the floor musing about her run and the odd hot/cold of Gage. While he was initially a bit cold and gruff, she thought he was feeling her out, but it changed when they arrived at the hospital, he even told her that she did good work as him and Roy took the patient into the treatment room. Wonder why he turned cold again. She thought about how he treated her when they were driving back to the station. She knew she had a lot to prove being a woman and all but for her it was more than even the men of station 51 could understand. This was literally her only chance to become something other than her family's name and money she remembered the day she escaped the estate.


Her father was fuming, literally frothing at the mouth as he yelled at the house workers. "Where is that ungrateful bitch daughter of mine!" Lou watched from the window as he ranted and raved about her leaving. "She is the only way you ingrates get paid!" He roared. She watched her, less than sober mother, toddle over to his side and join the yelling and raving at the only people who she really considered family. Tears quickly escaped her eyes and she stifled a sob as she knew that if her father fired them, they would have nowhere else to go but they had sacrificed so much already so she could escape this house and she wasn't going to waste it. She took off running across the grounds to the beat up 1970 yellow Hornet. The keys were exactly where she was told they would be with a few packed bags in the back seat, she double checked her purse with the 1200 dollars in it and hoped it would be enough. She could hear her father still screaming in the background as she started up the car and pulled away eternally grateful for the security guard, that 'forgot' the gate was open and she sped off headed to parts unknown. She continued to cry and sobbed louder as she thought of the people she loved and the danger they were in to help her escape that hell hole.


That had been nearly 6 months ago and now she was here, making it on her own as best she could, doing something she truly loved, helping people. A hand on her shoulder startled her and she swung the mop around like a bat solidly connecting with the ribcage of Chet Kelly. He let out a woosh of air and fell back falling on his butt on the wet floor and soaking his backside and legs. His eyes bugged out and he grabbed his right side trying to gasp in a breath.


"Shit!" she exclaimed as she watched him continue to try to gasp in a mouthful of air. She knelt to get on his level to help, for him to only look further scared and scoot back as if she was going to hit him again. She realized she was still holding the, now broken, mop and she dropped it to show him that she truly meant no harm to him. He continued his ministrations but was not getting air and she watched his eyes being to roll up in his head.


"Dammit!" She shouted, "JOHN, ROY, GUYS! NEED HELP OUT HERE!" She heard a thunder of footsteps come towards her direction adding, "CAREFUL IT'S WET" The steps were still quick but a bit more careful as she watched the crew round the engine to come toward the prone man who had finally passed out and resumed breathing and the woman that was checking him over.


"What the hell happened?!" Captain shouted, pausing only for a moment before he started barking orders to his engineer. "Mike call it in, take the station out of service, unknown time, and then call Chief for a replacement." He didn't wait for a reply knowing that his orders would be completed and spun on his heel walking towards his injured line man. "Again, what the hell happened?" The tone was lower but brokered no doubts he wanted answered and quickly.


Lou looked up with tears in her eyes and answered reluctantly, "He scared me while I was mopping and I hit him with the mop handle, I..."She trailed off. "I'm sorry." She downcast her eyes at Chet while John and Roy worked on him.


"What side did you hit him on?" Gage probed.


"Right side, it broke the mop handle." She pointed at the broken object on the concrete floor.


"His ribs too, geez Lou." Roy admonished had cut away the uniform and undershirt of the lineman and exposed the quickly bruising side.


"He touched my shoulder." She mumbled and felt the weight of judgement in the stares of the other crew members. A tear or two slipped out, against her will, and spilled over her cheeks. "I don't...I..." she sighed. "I'm sorry." Instead of kneeling close to the man to assist her partners she backed up and turned to leave with every intention to grab her belongings and run. That is what she was good at running, right? She thought morosely. The hand solidly placed on her shoulder took her by surprise, and she let out a small yelp and made to cover her face expecting to be hit.


The reaction was not lost on Cap, his eyes softened a bit. "Take a breath Lou, he'll be ok, but you have a patient." She looked very uncertain as Stanley motioned at the now conscious man who was complaining about the truck that hit him and being wet and cold.


Chet looked up at her and seemed to grin. "Well, I know now to not bother you while you're doing housework." He laughed which caused his face to screw up in pain and held fast to his side. "Damn what were you before you came here, a major league hitter?!" She knelt down to his side and started the IV that was handed to her while getting glared at by Gage and getting a worried look from Roy who had seen her reaction to Hank. Chet to his credit kept talking a mile a min while they loaded him up in the ambulance accompanied by Desoto and Gage.


Roy tossed Lou the keys with the simple command, "Follow us."


Hank sighed knowing that he needed to let her go so his paramedics had way to get back to the station. As she passed, he warned her, "We still need to talk." She nodded, tears gleaming in her eyes again while she got in the driver's side of the squad and followed the ambulance that carried the injured firefighter.