Chapter 4

Stella bit her bottom lip as she thought about what Kelly was asking her—he wanted to help her move on. She thought she was moving on; she thought she let Grant go years ago, but seeing Jessica brought back all the emotions she was trying to forget. Yes, she wants to be able to give her heart to someone again, maybe even Kelly, but with everything she has been through, she has big trust issues. Thanks to Grant and Jessica, learning to trust someone is harder than letting go of someone you once thought was your world.

Kelly watched her as she considered what he said: he wanted to help her, he wanted to move on, he wanted to move on with her, even though he'd been hurt too, and he had a feeling her past was a little more troubling than he could even think of. "Sometimes, all you need are open arms to hug and hold you, a shoulder to cry on, and someone there to tell you it's all going to be alright. Stella, let me be that person for you."

"Kelly, I'm pretty broken. Maybe I'm too broken," she said as she looked away.

He cupped her face, making her look at him. "Bull, everyone is fixable; they just have to want help. Look," he paused," I know what it's like to be broken. The day Christina left me broke my heart. I planned on asking her to marry me that weekend. I loved her more than I thought it was possible to love anyone. I thought she felt the same, but she told me she wasn't happy. I never knew it, or I just didn't pay attention. Maybe the signs were there, but I didn't see them. " He took a deep breath. "After she left, I kind of went through this I don't care stage. I lay in bed and refused to do anything or talk to anyone, even my daughter, who was only a month old. Gabby and Casey, especially my mom, tried every day to get me up, yelling at me and telling me how much Madison needed me now more than ever. My mom was so disappointed in me, she said. She didn't raise me to turn my back on my child just because life wasn't going my way. She said life isn't easy; you can't just climb into a hole every time something doesn't go your way. She said, you're a father now, Kelly, and you have a responsibility to your daughter. That little girl depends on you; she needs you; one parent just walked out on her; she doesn't deserve to lose both her parents.

For two weeks, I pretend like Madison didn't exist, my heartbreak was more important than her not having a mom, one night Madison was crying so loud, and she wouldn't stop, I had the pillow over my head, my mom came to the room and said that they were taking her to the hospital. She said, something is wrong Kelly, I can feel it, and at that moment I forgot all about how hurt I was, all that I could think of was, I can't lose Madison, " He started to cry, and he looked away from her, so she didn't see him. "She was six weeks old, and her fever was 102; even though it was just a fever, my mom still panicked. She was diagnosed with sepsis."

Stella squeezed his hand, her eyes filling with tears. "What is sepsis?"

"It's a blood infection. Sepsis is rare in infants, but it can be a serious complication of any type of infection. They started her on an antibiotic, and she was in the hospital with around-the-clock care for almost a month. The scariest month of my life, and I pray every day that God didn't take her from me. I made a promise to him if he didn't take my daughter that I would be the best father, get my life straight, and protect her."

"You're doing a great job with her," Stella assured him.

"She got better, and I got better; we have a great father-daughter relationship."

" She's a lucky little girl."

Kelly just smiled and said, "So is there anything else you want to know about me?" He wanted to let her in and tell her everything, hoping she would trust him enough to let him in again.

She bit her lip. "Did you and Christina fight a lot?" She asked, staring him in the eyes,

"Like, did we disagree on a lot of stuff?" she nodded. "Yeah, all couples have disagreements; I mean, we had our share. She used to make me so mad over the littlest thing. She was convinced I was cheating, which I never did. I've never cheated on her, but she would still accuse me even after Madison was born. She swears I was seeing someone else. But I wasn't. Why? Did you and Haley's dad fight a lot?" he asked, knowing there was a reason for her question.

"Grant," she said, and Kelly gave her a confused look. "Haley's dad's name is Grant," she told him, realizing she never did. "Yeah, we fought a lot—not in the beginning, but in the middle, towards the end, it became an everyday thing." She paused. "When Christina will get you upset, or like really pissed you off, did..." She drifted off.

Kelly stared at her. "Did what?" he asked, wondering what she was asking him.

"Did... Did she ever make you so mad that..." She paused again. "Did she ever make you so mad that you...hit her?" She said it so low,

Kelly was shocked. "No, hell no!" he said in a loud tone. "I never once thought about it." Kelly watched her for a second. "Did Grant hit you?" he asked in disbelief.

She looked away from him like she was ashamed. "Yes," she whispered. "Not once or twice, more like an everyday routine," she said, as she started to cry. "I tried to make him happy, but nothing worked; I always screwed something up, and that would just piss him off. I was his personal punching bag for almost two years." Her voice is fragile and almost broken.

Kelly is silent, frowning at his loss of words; he couldn't believe what he was hearing: "Stella, look, I...

"Mama, we are home?" A voice yelled, causing the two to stand up. Stella wiped her eyes, took a deep breath, and then walked away.

"Hey, baby," she said as she hugged her little girl. "Did you have fun?'

"Yeah, I did, you feel better mama?"

"Yeah, a little bit. Kelly made me the best-grilled cheese, and it made me better."

"My dad makes the best grilled cheese," Madison said with a huge smile.

"Anything for my girls," Kelly said as he walked into the room.

Stella looked at him; she really hated that they got interrupted. "Thanks, Gabby, for taking her; she's been wanting to go. But... " She began, but noticed the look Gabby gave her: "I'm sorry I've been so distant, Gabby; I don't mean to; I just don't know how to let people in."

"It's okay. I'm here if you need me, Stella," Gabby said as she hugged her.

"Where is Jessica?" Stella asked, noticing she wasn't in the room.

Gabby shrugged. "She is very straightforward," Gabby said.

Stella wasn't sure what Gabby meant by that, but she knew it was something that was bothering her. "What did she...

"Hey, ladies." Jessica said as she walked in the door, "Hey handsome" she said, as she noticed Kelly standing beside Stella. "Did you miss me?" she said seductively as she touched his arm. Batting her eyes at him and giving him a big, bright smile,

Stella sighed inside; she rolled her eyes. She knew what Jessica was planning in her head: how to get Kelly in her bed. Because that's what Jessica Kidd does: she sets her eyes on something, and whatever or whoever that something or someone is, she usually gets it. One thing she knows is that Jessica always gets what she wants, not caring who she hurts in the process. Now that she has her eyes on Kelly, even though Kelly doesn't belong to her, she still doesn't want him around Jessica. She was just starting to slowly open up to Kelly because she thinks he is different from Grant, but she once thought Grant walked on water. Look how that turned out.

Kelly looked at her. "Why would I miss you? I don't even know you." Kelly asked as he looked over at Stella, who looked a little jealous.

"Please, everyone knows or wants to get to know Jessica Kidd," she said in a sexy, confident voice. "And I know you missed me because I knew you were checking me out earlier." She leaned close to him. "You think I'm hot, and I know you're hot, so how about you and I go get to know each other better?" she winked. "Not in a talking way either."

Kelly was a little taken back; Jessica sure was straightforward. "Well. I hate to disappoint you, but I don't know you, and I have no intentions of getting to know you, other than maybe as a friend, and yeah, if I were checking you out, it's because I'm a guy; it's what we do, but it doesn't mean. I want you, or that I want to sleep with you." Kelly said this in a serious tone. "I have no interest in sleeping with you now or ever. I just thought you should know."

Jessica's eyes widened, her jaw dropped, and she was speechless. No guy has ever said that to her. Stella laughed on the inside; she was so worried that Jessica would talk Kelly into going out with her, but after that, it looked like Jessica wouldn't be getting anywhere with him.

Jessica was still standing there, staring at Kelly, who was watching Stella walk up the stairs. He wasn't trying to be mean to Jessica; he's not a mean guy, but he just spent the last hour and a half opening up to Stella, and she was slowly opening up to him. So, he would be a fool to walk away now; he knows Jessica played a big part in Stella getting hurt, and he wants to know more. Hell, he wants to know everything about her, as he has since the moment, he met her in Gabby's kitchen.

"Okay, we're ready," Stella said, as she and Madison, and Haley came down the stairs. Kelly smiled at the three of them. Stella was smiling; she changed into a red summer dress, showing her amazing legs, which he loved to stare at. Her hair was down, framing her face; she looked like an angel.

"Where are we going?" Jessica asked.

"We all have a dinner date at Kelly's," Gabby tells her.

"It's family only," Casey said

"And you weren't invited, sorry," Kelly tells her.

"Stella, I'm family," Jessica said coldly as she crossed her arms. She watched as the girls and Gabby walked out the door, and Kelly had his hand on Stella's lower part of her back.

"They mean real family, you know, the family who doesn't stab their sister in the back. Jess, go back to Springfield; you're not welcome here." Stella told her as she and Kelly walked out the door.

"You need to leave; I'm not leaving a stranger in my house," Casey tells her as he ushers her to the door. Jessica rolled her eyes and walked out.

Stella and Gabby were in the kitchen, preparing dinner. Casey and Kelly were upstairs with the girls, playing a broad game.

"So, what did Jess say to you about me?" Stella asked.

"Nothing; I swear she didn't bring your name up. She only talked to me about Kelly." Gabby said as she walked over to the sink.

" Kelly?" Stella questioned,

"Yeah, she wanted to know if he was single. Then she told me that they would make cute kids together." Gabby laughed.

Stella shook her head. She figured Jess was thinking of ways to get Kelly "So that's what you meant earlier when you said Jessica is very forward?"

"Yes, she isn't what I expected," Gabby told her honestly.

"She's changed a lot."

Gabby frowns at her. "So, what do you think about her moving here?" she asked, thinking she already knew.

Stella looked at her. "What are you talking about?" she asked confusedly.

Gabby stopped what she was doing. She looked at Stella, "She's moving here for good."

"Did she say that?"

"Yeah, she did," Gabby said as she studied her face. Realizing Stella had no idea. "You, okay?"

"Wow!" was all she said; she was so lost in her thoughts that she wasn't paying attention to what she was doing. "Mama," Haley said, as she and Madison walked into the kitchen. Her voice caused Stella to jump, and then the knife she was holding slipped and cut her finger. She cursed in pain as the blood started to trickle.

Gabby and the girls were at her side immediately. "I'm so sorry, mama! Are you OK?" Haley asked worriedly.

"I'm fine. Honey, I'm fine; you didn't do it; Mama wasn't paying attention. It's just a little cut," she said, trying to comfort her daughter.

"What happened?" Kelly asked, as he noticed everyone around Stella, He walked over to her and saw the blood.

"Stella cut her finger, Daddy, because she wasn't paying attention," Madison told him as she watched her aunt Gabby wrap a towel around Stella's finger.

"Go get the first aid kit, Gabby," Kelly said as he grabbed Stella's hand and walked her over to the sink, where he cleaned the wound. Gabby was about to make a sarcastic comment about Kelly trying to take over, but she stopped herself because she honestly liked the way he took charge. She knows now for a fact that he was falling for Stella.

Gabby came back with the kit. "Here you go, sir," she said, as she smiled at the two. She stood there and watched. As he placed the bandage over the close-to-two-inch gash, he kissed her finger sweetly. "All the better," he whispered as they locked eyes.

"Yes, all the better," she said, as she stared at him. "Thank you," she whispered.

"Anytime," he said to her, still holding her finger.

"Mama," Haley said, as she broke the two's starting contest. "Mama, are you okay now?"

"Yeah, honey," she said, as she looked at her daughter, "Mama's good now." Her eyes moved back to Kelly, who was still holding her finger.

"Good, now could you please French braid Madison's hair?" She begged, giving her mom her puppy eyes: "She said, no one has ever braided her hair."

"Really, no one has ever braided your hair? "She asked Madison as she bent down to her. Madison shook her head. "I would love to do it; just get me a comb and a hair thing," Stella said as she winked at Madison. Kelly stood there, just watching her interact with his daughter.

"Cool, thank you," Madison said as she hugged her. "Come on," Madison said to Haley.

Both girls took off running out of the kitchen. Gabby went back to cooking and smiling to herself, knowing that there was definitely something between the two. And now she has an idea of how to get them together as soon as possible. Stella smiled one last time at Kelly before walking back over to where Gabby was. Kelly took a deep breath. "Dinner smells good," he said, trying to start a conversation.

"We get invited over to your house for dinner, but Stella and I end up cooking. That's not fair, Severide." Gabby tells him.

Kelly shrugged his shoulders. "But you don't like my cooking unless I'm grilling steaks."

"True," Gabby tells him with a smirk.

Kelly stood in between the two girls. "So can I help?" he asked as he looked at Stella, who was looking down.

"Yeah, you cut the tomatoes," Gabby told him.

Kelly started to cut the tomatoes as he watched Stella cut the potatoes. "What?" she asked when she noticed him staring.

"I love your smile." He told her sweetly:

Stella looked down to hide the blush that appeared. She didn't say anything back. She just continued doing what she was doing.

Gabby stood there, watching the two closely. Yep, they definitely have a connection.

"Okay, Stella, I got the comb," Madison said as she and Haley walked into the kitchen.

Stella smiled at them and said, "Gabby could you finish for me?"

"Of course."

She sat down at the table with Madison standing in between her legs, and she combed her hair. "You have pretty hair," she told her.

"Thank you, Daddy, said I have my mama's hair."

Kelly stopped what he was doing and watched Stella with his daughter again. His heart was doing flip-flops,

"Where is your mama?" Haley asked innocently as she sat down at the table.

"Daddy said that Mama loved me very much, and leaving me was a hard decision. But she wasn't ready to be a mom, so she left me with my grandma Jennifer and my aunt Gabby. So, they can teach me everything that Mama would teach me if she were still here. I wish I could meet her one day; I do have her picture up in my room."

"Oh, she didn't want to be your mom," Haley asked confusedly. The adults all exchanged looks, wondering if this little conversation was going to end badly.

"She did; she just didn't know how, but I got my dad." She looked at Kelly and smiled. "And he's the best dad in the world." She blew a kiss to him. Then laughed as Kelly pretended to catch it. "Where's your daddy?" Madison asked innocently. Everyone looks at Haley.

Haley looked at her mom and said, "He died when I was three; I have a picture of him in my room too. I don't remember much about him, but Mama does tell me stories."

"Sorry, your daddy is dead," Madison told her sadly. "What was his name?"

Haley smiled and said, "Thank you; his name was Grant, and Mommy said I was his world." Haley said proudly.

Gabby and Kelly both looked at Stella. She didn't look at them; instead, she changed the whole subject: "So I heard Justin Bieber was coming to town this winter.". She said this, knowing both girls would drop their conversation.

"Can we go, mama, please?" Haley begged.

"Yeah, Daddy, can we go?" Madison begged.

"We will see," Kelly said as he looked at her, then back at Stella, who was biting her bottom lip. She didn't look at him.

"Okay, you're all done," Stella told her.

"Thank you," Madison said. "Daddy, do you like it?"

"Yep, you look beautiful," Kelly told her as he walked over to her. He sat down at the table and put Madison on his lap. He kissed her forehead, then looked over at Stella, who was now doing Haley's hair just like she had done Madison's.

"All done, baby girl," Stella said a few moments later as she hugged her daughter. "You look like a princess."

"Thank you, mama."

"My mom called; she wants to take the girls to a movie after dinner if it's okay," Kelly said to Stella

"Please..." Haley said, looking at her mom.

"It's fine with me, but don't forget you have school tomorrow, so don't give me a hard time getting ready tomorrow," Stella told her in her warning voice.

"I won't, I promise," Haley told her as she hugged her.

After dinner and after cleaning up, the four adults sat in the living room. Talking and laughing. Gabby and Casey were sitting on the couch, and Stella was sitting in a chair, occasionally looking over at Kelly, who was sitting in a chair beside the couch. "I'm sorry about Jess," Stella tells them.

"You have nothing to be sorry about," Gabby tells her.

"I know she can be a lot to handle, and she's very flirty, forward, and self-centered. I'm not sure how she got that way. I pretty much raised her after our mom died." She paused. "I apologized for lying to you guys too; I didn't mean to."

"Lying about what?"

"I told you guys that I lost my mom, grandma, and sister in a house fire when I was nine. That's all true. I had two sisters. My oldest sister, McKayla, died. Jess was around four or five, and she used to follow me everywhere. So, I begged my mom to let me make a bedroom in the basement because I was tired of sharing a room. " She paused, as she remembered. "Well, the night of the fire, Jess came to my room crying, saying she was scared and couldn't sleep. So, I let her sleep in my room. We never heard anything or smelled smoke. There was a door that led out to the backyard in the basement, and it wasn't until the firefighters busted the door open that we woke up. They carried me and Jess out of the house. "

" Wow!"

"Yeah, the fire apparently started upstairs. My grandfather, who lived a few blocks away, was called to the scene. I remember how lost and hurt he looked as he walked around screaming all of our names. Jess yelled, Grandpa! He turned around, and relief washed over him. As he ran to us. "

"Are you okay?" Gabby asked as Stella got quiet.

Stella looked at her. "Yeah, anyway, Jess and I went to live with him. He did the best he could for us. He tried so hard. I put my life on hold to be there for Jess. Grandpa could only do so much; he wasn't in the best of health. Jess and I grew very close. We had the best relationship. She was always there for me. Even after Grant died. " She took a deep breath. "She played a big role in why I moved here; it wasn't just for a change; I needed to leave my past and Jess."

Gabby looked over at Kelly, who was staring at Stella.

"Grant and I met in high school, young lovers. high school sweethearts, he was everything I wanted in a boyfriend. He joined a band after graduation and was doing so well. He asked me to marry him the night I graduated high school. I said yes. I was in love with him; he was my charming fairytale prince. We got married when I was twenty and had Haley at twenty-three." Stella sighed and looked at Kelly. "Jess was there for me after he died. She helped me with Haley, who was only three; she was the person who held me together. A lot of stuff happened between me and Grant, but his death hit me hard."

Kelly watched her, realizing she didn't want to go into detail about what Grant did to her. Or maybe she didn't want Casey and Gabby to know Grant abused her.

"I was getting my life together, and it felt good to be able to breathe again. And then, six months ago, my whole world came crashing down on me. Jess got drunk one night and spilled her guts, basically."

"What did she spill?" Gabby asked, concerned and curious, why their relationship ended.

" Jessica had her first son, Dylan, at fifteen; she told me the father was a one-night stand and she couldn't remember his name. And I was there for her. She was my sister, and she was only fifteen. She moved in with Grant and me, and at twenty-one, she got pregnant again with my second nephew, Joshua. "

" She was in college and working. Dylan was just turning five, and Haley was two. And Grant was touring a lot. He had a friend help Jess get a place. And he made sure Jess was taken care of. Which I should have paid attention to more, and maybe I would have connected the dots sooner. "

Kelly's eyes widened as he looked at Gabby, who he believed came to the same conclusion he did.

Stella looked at the three of them. "About nine months after Grant died, I discovered that Grant had three other kids. One in New Jersey, one in Florida, and one in Miami. That's just the ones I knew about. Chances are, he probably has more. I just don't know about them."

"Damn, that bastard," Gabby said.

"Does Haley know? *Casey asked.

"No, I want to wait till she's older. I haven't talked to his kids or their parents in years. "

"That had to be hard to find out; he was cheating on you," Kelly said

"I knew he was cheating; the signs were there. But at that time, I was too numb to care. "

She ran her fingers through her hair. " Six months ago, I found out that Grant had two more kids. This time it hit me hard, and I still can't process it. I'm so torn between walking away and pretending it doesn't bother me or confronting it all and being honest with Haley."

"Honest with Haley?" Casey asked.

"Yeah, I know she should know the truth, but how..." She began.

Kelly watched her. "But how... what?"

Stella looked at the three of them and asked, "How do you tell your six-year-old that her cousins Dylan and Joshua are actually her half-brothers? Her daddy, who was the light of her world, is also her cousin's daddy. How do you do that?"

Casey and Gabby gave her a shocked look and a sympathetic half-smile. "I have no clue, girl," Gabby tells her.

Kelly didn't say anything; he just kept his eyes on Stella.

"That son of a bitch was sleeping with my fifteen-year-old sister. I helped raise his sons whom he had with my sister. And I had no clue. She was in love with my husband; they were together the whole time we were married. And I'm supposed to just forgive her. How do I do that?" She asked them as her tears fell.