Chapter 5

Dawson and Stella were sitting on the couch, enjoying some wine, unwinding from their day of shopping, and going down memory lane. It was like nothing changed between them; their friendship picked up right from where they left it twelve years ago. "I missed hanging out with you," Stella said, as she took a sip of her wine.

"Me too; Chicago wasn't the same after you left," Dawson said as she looked at her.

They were silent for a moment. "Are you still sad that you didn't get to see Severide at the firehouse when we stopped by earlier?" she teased.

"No, I wasn't sad," Stella tells her. Honestly, she was a little bit. She doesn't understand it, but her mind has been on him all day. And everyone she met at the firehouse was telling her that Severide hadn't quit talking about her. That made her smile.

"Whatever you say," Dawson said with a smirk. "I'm glad you got to meet everyone but the squad guys." Squad was out on a call when they got there. Dawson could tell Stella was a little upset over it, but she played it off.

"They seem like a pretty good group, a great firehouse."

"Best one in Chicago."

Stella nods and says, "You seem like you are happy in life. You've got a beautiful home, and a wonderful husband, and you work at one of the best firehouses. It's a nice, happy life. You are happy, right?"

"Without a doubt," Dawson told her, taking a sip of her wine. "Are you happy in New York?"

Stella laid her head back against the couch and thought for a moment. "Do you want me to lie or be honest?"

"I would prefer honesty," Dawson told her as she watched her friend carefully.

"When someone normally asks me that question, I just say, of course, yeah, without a doubt, the best place in the world." She sighed deeply, then looked over at Dawson. "I would lie through my teeth. But I don't want to lie to you, Gabby. I'm miserable in New York; I've hated that place; I was happy for like almost a year after I moved there. Things happen that make me hate that place. Things that I don't like talking about."

Gabby sat her wine glass down on the coffee table. "Stella, what happened?"

"I can't tell you; you'll look at me like I was a different person. You will judge me. You wouldn't understand."

"No, I won't," Dawson told her as she reached for her hand. " Stella, I promise, whatever you say will not change the way I see you, and I would never judge you or the situation you've been through. I would be your friend, your supporter, someone you can vent to. I know we lost twelve years, but I still have your back no matter what. Pinky swear." She tells her as she shows her, her pinky.

Stella smiled. "Wow, that takes me back, " she said as she locked her pinky with Gabby's.

They used to do this all the time when they were little, they both said, " I swear" at the same time.

"See now that we pinky swear, whatever you say to me or whatever I say to you, will never leave this room."

"I hated leaving Chicago and going to live in a new city with an aunt that I had only seen like three or four times in my life. My mom and she fought a lot; she was arrested at my grandma's funeral when I was fourteen."

" Really? Why?"

"I don't know; my mom never told me."

" Oh"

"I was a total bitch my first month there. I was convinced that New York was the worst place. But my aunt did everything to help me be more comfortable. And it started to get better; school was okay, and I made so many good friends. I even joined the cheerleading squad."

"Shut the hell up, you did not." Gabby gasps

"I did; my friend Stacy talked me into it. I will admit it wasn't as bad as I thought; I've always liked dancing, and technically, cheerleading is like dancing. Things started looking up; I even met a guy that I liked; his name was Devin, and he was on the basketball team. "

"Well, damn, you changed. The cheerleader is dating the star basketball player, and I'm impressed."

Stella rolled her eyes. "Anyway, things were going well. Way better than I expected. Six months living there in my life was good, I had a good group of friends, my aunt and I got close, and I had a boyfriend—my first official boyfriend." She smiled as she thought back to the happy times.

Dawson watched her for a second, loving the look on her face. She looked really happy.

"After my sixteenth birthday, everything changed." She took a sip of her wine. "It was exactly ten months after I moved there that life was going well. My aunt threw this great sweet sixteen party for me. She wanted to make it special since it was my first birthday without my mom."

"That was sweet of her."

"Yeah, that was the last nice thing she did for me. Her boyfriend was apparently locked up for drugs, resisting arrest, and domestic violence. She said it wasn't her he hit; it was his ex-girlfriend who came trying to interfere with their relationship."

" Wow! "

Stella sat her wine glass down. "The day after my party, Stacy and I were in my room dancing around. When my aunt came in, she said she wanted us to come to meet her boyfriend, Sonny. So, we did; he was really cute for an older guy; he was around thirty-something. He shook our hands and called us beautiful. We were sixteen, so having a cute older guy say we were beautiful was flattering to us."

"Of course, it was."

"The first month he was home, it was good. But then one morning, my aunt got called into work early. It was a Sunday, so I didn't have any plans; Stacy goes to her dad's on Sundays, and Devin was at a family gathering. So, I was just going to chill at home. " She paused, "I was in the kitchen getting some juice and talking to Stacy on the phone. Sonny and his friend Paul were there. Paul was creepy; he kept eyeing me up and licking his lips. Sonny punched her in the shoulder and said, Knock it off; you're making her uncomfortable."

Dawson noticed that the color of Stella's face was draining. "Stella, you don't have to tell me...

"No, I want to," she sighed. " I went back to my room and locked the door. I stayed there till my aunt got home. When I came out for dinner, Paul was gone. We had dinner like we normally do. I was cleaning up the kitchen. When I felt hands on my hips, it was Sonny, He said, "Sorry about making you feel uncomfortable today; I will keep him at bay. But maybe you shouldn't wear sexy tops and shorts around us; you made me jack off for an hour today, and that wasn't nice. He kissed my ear, then walked away. "

"Did you tell your aunt?"

"No, I didn't want to upset her or cause any problems. I thought he only did it because he was drinking and it wouldn't happen again."

"It happened again?"

Stella bit her lip as she looked over at Dawson. "It got much worse after that," she tells her, as her eyes tear up.

Gabby moved closer to her, wrapping her in a hug. "I'm sorry, she trailed off as her phone rang. "It's just Matt. I'll call him back."

Stella shook her head. "No, answer it. Something could be wrong."

Hey, babe."

Stella sat there, watching and listening to Gabby talk to her husband. There was a tad bit of jealousy going through her as she thought about how Gabby's life turned out better than hers—it wasn't fair. "I'm going to go lay down."

Gabby looked at her. "Matt, hold on a second," she said, muting the phone. "No, I'm almost done; then we can...

"I kind of want to be alone right now. Sorry."

"Okay, see you in the morning."

"Gabby, please don't tell Matt about what I said," Stella begged.

"I won't cross my heart."

"Thank you, goodnight."

Gabby watched her walk out of the room, her heart breaking for what she'd been through. Even though she only knows a little, she has a feeling that it only gets worse from there.

Stella went to the guest room and lay down, she really wished Kelly wasn't on shift. Last night was the first time she didn't cry herself to sleep. She felt safe with Kelly, even though she didn't know him that well. He gave her a sense of peace, she thought she lost a long time ago. She closed her eyes and cried herself to sleep.

The next morning, Stella walked into the kitchen. "Morning," she said, as she saw Gabby at the stove.

" Morning"

"What are you up to?"

"I was fixing Matt and Severide breakfast; they had a bad call late last night. Just wanted to do something nice for them."

"What happened?" Stella asked as she poured herself a cup of coffee.

"House fire. They were able to save the dad, a teenage boy, and his girlfriend." Gabby sighed. " But Matt found the three-year-old under the bed; she was already deceased. Kelly also rescued a baby, but she died on the way to the hospital."

"Damn, that's awful, that poor family."

"Yep, the whole firehouse is devastated."

"I bet I hate calls like that. It sucks when you can't save everyone."

"It sure does."

Matt walked into the kitchen and immediately went to Gabby, who pulled him into a hug. Stella watched as Gabby comforted him. "I've been doing this for close to ten years, but calls like that still get to me," Casey said as the hug broke.

"Me too," Kelly said, walking into the kitchen.

"We're only humans; if calls like that didn't get to you, then there's something seriously wrong with you. at least in my opinion." Stella said as she poured Kelly a cup of coffee and gave it to him.

Kelly smiled and said, "Thanks," surprised that she did that. She winked at him.

"I agree," Dawson said as she went back to flipping pancakes. " Those calls can pull at the heartstrings. "

Stella watched Kelly and Matt both sitting on the barstool in front of the counter. She could tell it was still weighing on them. She reached out and squeezed Kelly's hand. Giving him a small smile when he looked up at her. She wanted to comfort him but didn't know how.

They ate breakfast in silence, not knowing what to say. As Gabby was cleaning up. Casey and Kelly were still sitting there with distant looks in their eyes. "My first hard call was so hard on me that I quit."

" What? seriously?" Gabby asked.

Kelly looked up at her and asked, "What happened?"

"It was around my second month as a firefighter. It was an apartment fire; it was blazing when we got there. For the first twenty minutes or so, I was inside looking for victims. When I brought a victim out, someone was telling my chief that the dumpster on the side of the building was on fire; it was deliberately set on fire. So, he and I went over to check it out. " She paused for a moment. "I wasn't prepared for what happened next."

Kelly squeezed her hand and said, "You don't have to tell us If it's too hard."

"No, I want to. she tells him. She normally doesn't talk to anyone about her life or how she feels about certain calls. But they make it easy to talk to them. "We put the fire out and opened the dumpster..." She closed her eyes, trying to hide her tears. "There was an infant and a boy about one inside." Tears escape as she talks.

"Oh, my God!" Gabby exclaimed.

"What the hell?" Casey added.

"They were deceased by the time we got there."

Kelly stood up and walked over to her, wrapping his arms around her. She laid her head on his shoulder. "We found out that night that someone set those kids on fire and tossed them in the dumpster. That's how the apartment fire started."

"What kind of sicko would do that?" Casey asked.

Gabby was crying as she watched her friend. "Their father apparently did it as revenge against their mom for trying to leave him."

"Sick bastard," Gabby said.

"It got really into my head; I couldn't sleep, eat, or think straight. It started to affect my job performance. So, one day, I just left in the middle of my shift. I didn't think I was strong enough to be a firefighter. So, I quit like everyone said was going to happen."

The three of them exchanged looks while she was talking. "But you went back," Gabby asked.

"Misty, one of the other female firefighters, is also the reason I became a firefighter. She and my chief were there for me, helping me see that I do have what it takes to be a great firefighter. They were the first people in my life to believe in me. "

"I always believed in you," Gabby said.

"I know; I meant the first people in New York that believed in me. They were there when I didn't have anyone. I probably wouldn't even be here today if it wasn't for them."

The three of them just looked at her, and Gabby knew she was probably referring to what she told her last night. Kelly wanted her to open up more; he had so many questions. But he didn't want to push the subject.

After a few moments of quietness "I think I'm going to try and get some sleep; I didn't get much last night," Casey said as he kissed Gabby's cheek.

"We are taking Boden's boat out today," Kelly said. as he looks down at Stella, who is still in his arms.

"Are you sure? We don't have to if you're not up to it."

"It would be a welcome distraction," Kelly told her as he kissed the top of her head.

Gabby watched them for a moment. She was thinking about what Stella said about being broken and damaged. Maybe, just maybe, Kelly is the medicine she needs to heal what's broken. And show her she's not as damaged as she thinks.

They spent the past four hours on the deck. His back was flat on the mat, and her head was well-rested on his bare chest. He was lying there in blue and white swim trunks. He had one hand resting behind his head as the other one played with the strings of her black bikini. "You're the first girl I brought onto this boat." Breaking the silence between them.

"Really? She said as she was fondling the buttons on his shirt.

"Yes, really"

"I feel special," she teased.

He looked down at her and said, "You are special." She blushed and looked away. "Can I ask you something, Stella?

" Yeah"

" Earlier You said that Misty lady and your chief were the reasons you were here today. What did you mean by that?"

She lay there for a second, thinking, "Nothing."

Kelly arched his eyebrow. "I think it's something; I'm curious about you; I want to know things about you."

She looked up at him. She couldn't describe it, but something about his eyes made her want to open up to him and tell him everything she'd been through. She took a deep breath. "Can you promise you won't tell anyone? I'm a private person. I don't feel comfortable sharing stuff with people."

"I won't tell a soul, I promise." He tells her as he runs his finger up and down her arm.

"I've been through a lot, Kelly, and I got hooked on drugs pretty badly. When I was nineteen, I overdosed. I woke up in the hospital. Not remembering anything. There was a fire at my aunt's house, and Misty and Clayton are my firefighters. They saved me," she said, pausing. "They visited me every day I am in the hospital. I didn't have any family or friends, so Misty, a complete stranger, took me home with her." She closed her eyes as a few teardrops fell.

Kelly felt the tears on his chest. "Are you okay?" he asked. As he stroked her hair.

"Yeah, it's just hard sometimes to talk about my past."

"I understand that; you don't have to say anything more."

"I want to; I like talking to you, but I don't want you to see me differently."

"I won't, I promise. Everyone has a past; it's not my place to judge anyone."

She gave him a small smile. "Misty had me go to rehab. I was there for almost a year. She became my family. I decided to go to rehab because I wanted to be a firefighter like Misty. She helped me study and get ready for the test. She was my biggest supporter. I didn't have anyone supporting me since my mom died when I was fifteen."

"I'm sorry about your mom." He told her. As he continues to stroke her hair.

"I lost a piece of my soul the day she died. No one understood what I was going through."

" I do."

She sat up, looking down at him. "You do?" She was a little surprised.

" Yeah"

"You lost someone, close to you too?"

Kelly took a deep breath. "I lost my best friend about four years ago."

"I'm sorry."

"Shay was my best friend and my roommate."

Stella's eyes widen. "Shay, was Gabby's paramedic partner, right?" He looked at her, surprised that she knew. "Gabby told me about her. She was beautiful; she sent me a picture."

"Yeah, she was." He thought for a second. "I felt so disconnected from everyone and everything around me."

"I know exactly what you mean. I lost my best friend and boyfriend."

" Stella...

"I've lost four people who meant a lot to me back-to-back my mom at fifteen, my best friend at sixteen, my boyfriend at seventeen, and my aunt at eighteen. "She looked down at the deck. "I couldn't cope; drugs were my best friend; they helped me stay numb."

Kelly wasn't sure what to say. "I went to Los Vegas and got married to cope with my loss," he tells her, trying to lighten the mood.

Her eyes widen. "You got married?"

"I did. I just lost my friend; she lost someone, and we just thought we could comfort each other. I guess. It lasted maybe a month."

" Wow!"

He shrugged his shoulders. "It helped with the pain."

She nods. "I get that. I get that." He leaned in and kissed her. "What was that for?"

"You're beautiful, and I just wanted to."

"You're just too sweet; why are you still single?" She asked as his hand rested on her cheek.

"I was waiting on you to enter my life."

"Kelly..." She starts not knowing what to say. He sure knows what to say to get to her.

"You're the first girl that made me feel this way. I know it seems rushed or whatever, but it isn't to me. I don't know there's just… There's just something between us that I feel is just so right, like nothing I have ever felt before. Don't you feel it?" He needed to know she was on the same page as him.

She didn't expect him to say that. She sat on top of him. Something about the way he looked at that moment, or maybe it was something inside of her that got her in the mood. She was definitely feeling things she had never felt before. But she wasn't girlfriend material. She just wants to have fun. She has five days left, and she wants to enjoy them with him. Because she has no plan of seeing him again. Nothing serious was coming out of what they were doing. Just amazing sex.

"Let's have a little fun." She said as her hands, merely running through his hair, arouse him so with her slightly swaying her hips.

"Don't tease me like this," he moaned, ruffling her hair into her hands.

"Who says it's just for teasing?" She winked, her lips connecting with her chest.

"Stella..." He managed to get out with a low, hoarse voice. He took her face and lifted it up to his. "People can see us."

" And?" She asked, "Are you afraid of an audience?" She teased.

"Hell no."

"Good, because I can't wait any longer. She dropped her lips to his ear and said, "I'm so wet, I was hoping you could help me out."

The way she whispered in his ear made him immediately excited. "It would be my pleasure." He tells her he was breathing heavily. He began to gently run his hands up and down her thighs. She was just in a bikini, which means there won't be much to take off. "You have no idea what you do to me."

Before she could speak, he kissed her lips, gently at first, then more deeply and urgently until their mouths were open with passion. She felt his cock through his shorts. "I want this," she whispered, as she pulled down his shorts. His cock was already hard. "You have the biggest and most beautiful cock. I have ever seen. My pussy is so wet and swollen, and I am aching to have it."

Kelly closed his eyes as he felt her hot breath on his cock. "It's yours, all yours." His hands were all over her. He took her top off so he could feel her breasts. His other hand rubbed her tight ass.

Stella unwrapped both sides of her bikini bottoms and slowly pulled them off. She was stark naked now. She leaned forward and started to gently and passionately kiss Kelly. Her tongue and lips were fluid.

Stella took his cock in both hands, slid it tightly against the outside of her pussy, and started moving back and forth, bringing them both to a frenzy of excitement. She came with a prolonged shuddering orgasm and finished by sliding her fingers into her dripping pussy and rubbing her wetness over his cock and balls.

She knelt by the railing, taking Kelly's cock in her warm, sensuous mouth, and proceeded to use her tongue, lips, and mouth to devour it. She licked her wetness off his shaft and then slid her fingers back into her pussy to make it slippery again.

Kelly tried to hold it in but just couldn't, so he let his cock explode into Stella's mouth. Just as he started cumming, she moved her mouth back a little, ran her tongue back and forth underneath the head of his cock, and slid one hand around his balls.

Kelly looked down at her and found her eyes looking straight into his. As his cum shot across her tongue and into her open mouth, she smiled slightly and never took her eyes off his. She slowly squeezed the remaining liquid from his cock and let it drip into her mouth from her fingers.

She kissed him and rubbed his chest. The sensation was explosive. She couldn't believe that she was getting him hard again so soon after he had cum. But again, he managed to rise to the occasion.

After making sure he was fully hard by using the magic of her mouth, she straddled him again and lowered her pussy onto his cock. "You're so warm, so tight," he moaned.

At first, she moved up and down, letting his cock almost slip out and then sliding tightly back down over it. He could see her beautifully pointed breasts and started massaging them as her nipples slowly stiffened.

Stella leaned over and started tongue-kissing him again. Her forward movement resulted in her pussy rubbing tightly against him, with his cock buried inside of her. Instead of letting her move up and down.

Kelly grabbed her firm ass with both hands, tightened the contact between her pussy and his pelvis, and moved back and forth. She came with a wild climax and kissed him with such passion that he could hardly breathe.

Somehow Kelly managed to keep from coming. After a few minutes of lying quietly in each other's arms, she slowly slid her pussy off his cock. "We are fucking incredible together," he said, watching as Stella went down his body again.

Stella then alternated between sexily sucking his cock and slipping it back into her warm, dripping pussy. She licked his cock until he thought he would explode.

During one of these "cooling off" periods, she moved her pussy up to his mouth and lowered herself onto his tongue and lips. Kelly ate her until she came and then continued to lightly lick her pussy while sliding his fingers into her pussy. That, plus his tongue and lips on her pussy, was more than Stella could take, and again she came with a wild orgasm that shook her entire body.

Finally, after she had cum so many times that they both lost track, Kelly sat up with her sitting on his chest facing him.

She could feel it deeply buried in her pussy, and her pussy was tight against him. Instead of moving his cock in and out of her, Kelly remained tightly inside of her. She tightened her pussy around his cock and then relaxed it, repeating this in rhythm.

They continued their deep kissing, and he played with her nipples. The combination of her soft, supple breasts, passionate kissing, and tightening pussy overwhelmed him. Kelly came inside of her in a tremendous orgasm without moving his cock at all. "See, I told you what you do to me is priceless," he laid down, taking her with him.

"Shut up," she said, as she tried to catch her breath. also trying to hide her blush. "Kelly." She gazed down shyly, her fingers going back to drawing in circles again.

"Stella…" He stated, his eyes intently on hers; for the first time, she felt vulnerable as hell.

She half smiled. Nothing," she answered. "No big…"

"C'mon, I want to know." He begged. "What's on your mind?" taking one of her hands into his and then placing it over his lips for a quick kiss.

"Do you say..." she sighed, "I want..."

"What do you want? Anything you want, I'll give it to you. What is it?"

"I want to know if you say those sweet things to other girls, you're having sex with." She scooted over closer, her body nervously pressing up against his as she whispered very softly into his ears. "I'm just curious."

He took her hand and entwined it with his, his eyes staying steadily on hers. "No, you're the first. I'm usually the fuck 'em and leave them type, never thinking about them again. But you, I can't stop thinking about you. And it scares me."

"I'm scared too," she whispered. "I've never felt anything like this before."

"We could be scared together." He tells her as he pushes her hair out of her face.

"I live in New York."

"Are you happy in New York?" She bites her lip. "I was thinking maybe... you could transfer to Chicago; Boden would love you; the whole 51 would love you. I would love to have you here. And we could give us a try."

She is silent for a moment. "I'm happy in New York; I love it there," she lied to him. She hated doing it, but she was saving him from getting hurt. She can't be with him; this is sex, nothing more, and it can't be more. She wasn't prepared for what he said next.

"I could move to New York."