A/N: Trigger warning Chapter, the next couple of chapters will be trigger warning ones focusing on Stella's past.

Chapter 7

Later that afternoon Casey and Gabby went to pay their respects to the Herrmann family. Kelly convinced Stella to have a picnic in the park. She looked around the park while Kelly spread out a blanket, and got the food out.

" Gabby said you like chicken salad, so I got that and some chips and two bottles of iced tea. "

Stella smiled down at him, "That sounds perfect." She tells him as she sat down on the blanket. " It's crazy but this is the exact picnic my mom packed for us and Gabby our last picnic in this park."

Kelly looked over at her, as her eyes watered. " Are you okay?"

" Yeah, sometimes memories just sneak up on you."

" I know that feeling "

She leans over and kisses him softly " Thank you, for this it's the nicest thing anyone has done for me and a long time."

" The pleasure is all mine." He tells her as he kisses her again.

" So, tell me what your mom was like if you want."

Stella smiled. " She was the best; I know everyone says that about their mom but my mom was the best. People used to say we looked like twins and that we were more sisters than mother and daughter. I was able to talk to her about anything no matter the subject, she was my safety net. "

Kelly smiled, " My mom was a good mom, her only downfall was she allowed my dad to control her for too long. She let that man treat her horribly for years he put her through so much hell and she just allowed it to happen but she did her best when it came to me. "

" So, your dad's not part of your life?" Stella asked.

" He comes and goes in my life even today as an adult he likes to pop in sometimes at the worst moment and try to control the situation or his words to make it better, but he only makes it worse. We've had a few disagreements over the years, and he knows how to push my buttons. "

" I'm sorry... I didn't know my dad, after my mom got pregnant, he told her he wasn't the settling down type. And took off, and never called, or wrote to me, I thought he would at least reach out after she died, but nope nothing. I don't know if he's in Chicago or somewhere else. I always wondered where he was, if I've actually passed him and just didn't know it."

For the next few minutes, they stayed quiet and ate. " Let's take a walk. " He said, as he stood up and extended his hand out to her. She smiled and took his hand.

" It turns out to be a beautiful day. " She said, as they walked. " Chicago is such a beautiful city "

" It is, I love it here."

She stopped walking and looked at a little blond hair girl getting pushed on the swing by a taller verse of the girl. " My mom used to push me on that swing." She tells him. As she continues to watch the excitement on the little girl's face. " We used to come to this park all the time. My mom, me, and Gabby."

" You and Gabby go way back huh?"

" Yeah, we met on the first day of kindergarten and we were instant best friends My mom used to say we were sowed at the hip because we were always together. " She paused and looked around the park she watched the kids chasing each other and going down the slides and adults playing with kids. " I had my first kiss underneath that tree."

" Oh really." He spoke. As he wrapped his arms around her waist.

She smiled and teased "Oh don't be jealous I was like ten."

" Ten is when you had your first kiss?"

" What can I say I was adorable." She jokes "It was during the summertime my mom and Gabby's mom were here and Gabby's brother kissed me underneath that tree he was 12 think it was a simple pack nothing big."

" Antonio Dawson was your first kiss?"

" Yep, I had a crush on him."

" That crush went away right."

She laughed. " Oh yeah, it never amounted to anything. He said I was like his second little sister. He crushed me." She says in a playful sad tone. " At my fifteen birthday parties, he told me I was beautiful I always wondered if I never left Chicago, would we have ended up dating."

"It's a good thing he's married now," Kelly said.

" Quit being jealous."

" I'm not jealous, I'm stating the obvious and I'm way cuter than him."

She smiled and leaned back against him. " You are definitely cuter." She agrees. " God, I have so many memories here "

Kelly watches her for a moment. " Is that why you won't move back to many memories of your mom here?"

" No, I love the memories of her, I kind of forgot a lot of them since I've been gone, but being back these last four days, I feel her surrounding me. It gives me so much comfort in peace. Crazy as it sounds it's like she's here I can feel her spirit. " She paused. "I love this city I loved growing up here so many wonderful memories."

" You could feel her spirit every day move back to Chicago, feel closer to her, get your best friend back. Casey's is a really good friend too; you could work at the best Firehouse in Chicago and I could..." He stopped himself, not sure exactly how to label himself. He wants to be her boyfriend, but that's a whole new experience for him being someone's boyfriend. He's never done anything like that. What if he's not good at it, what if he's bad at it?"

She bit her lip as she waited for him to continue, but he didn't say anything. She turns in his arms and wraps her arms around his neck. " And what?" She questioned.

" Nothing."

She can tell he wants to say something but he's debating himself. " I want to know, you are trying to convince me to move back to Chicago, telling me my best friend is here, how Casey can be a good friend, and I could work at the best Firehouse in Chicago, but where does that leave you, what role would you have in my new life?"

He stares at her for a moment, " Honestly?"

" Yes, I prefer honesty."

"If I can choose, I would love to a tryout "

" A tryout?"

" I want to be your boyfriend, but I'm not sure if I'm boyfriend material." He tells her as he watches her eyes widen. " I've never been someone's boyfriend."

" I am not sure if I'm girlfriend material." She tells him, as she looks down at his shirt. " Last time I was someone's girlfriend I was sixteen, and that didn't end too well."

Kelly kissed the top of her head. " We could test the water out together. "

" Meaning?"

" We can do a trial period."

She looks up at him, " A trial period? You make it sound like we're signing up for Netflix." She laughed. " How does that work?"

He smiles at her. " We try the boyfriend-girlfriend thing, see if it's something we both like and can do. Since this whole relationship thing is new to us."

Stella nods, as she thinks about what he said. " But I'm leaving in two days.''

" I can come with you."

"No, I can't let you give up your life here, to follow me."

" But I want...

" I'll agree to this trial period, on two terms one you stay in Chicago, and I'll stay in New York." She said as she watched his face fall. " Kelly, I don't want you to change your whole life, for a trial period relationship. "

Kelly shrugged, " I understand where you're coming from so I agree with that term."

" Good, how long is this trial period for?"

Kelly thought for a moment. " One month "

Stella arched her eyebrow. " A month?"

" A month I think is good, it will give us both a glimpse of what it's like to be in a relationship. And we can decide in the end if we want to continue or not."

Stella thought for a while. " I can do that. But we're going to be apart a lot." She said as she gets a little sad.

" I can come to see you; we'll make it work. I know we can." She nods, "What's the second term."

Stella gave him a small smile. " I want to tell you everything about my past first. I want you to know what I've been through. I'm a little paranoid, from what I've been through and I need you to know what you're getting yourself into before you make a commitment to me."

Kelly leaned in and kissed her. " I want to know everything, but I need you to know that nothing you say is going to change my mind. I'm not going anywhere Stella; I want to be with you."

Stella smiled at him, before kissing him. He pulled her closer to deepen the kiss. She wants to try to be his girlfriend, but she is scared that once he knows everything, he's going to change his mind about her. " I have an idea," Kelly said as the kiss broke

" What's that?"

" We can go to my dad's cabin, and stay there tonight. We could kiss, make out and talk. If you want."

" I like that idea." She tells him as she kisses him again.

Later that night Kelly and Stella were at the cabin. The cabin had a slight chill, so Kelly started a fire, then Kelly grabbed a couple of pillows from the bed and took a thick quilt from the shelf. By the time Kelly returned, Stella was wrapped in the throw from the back of the sofa and standing in front of the fireplace. He took the quilt and spread it on the floor in front of the fireplace. " Stella, you still cold." He asked, as he slowly approached her. Once she looked back at him, he knew it was okay to wrap his arms around her from behind her. He never wants to scare her like he did last night again.

" I'm warming up now."

Within seconds they were both feeling the warmth from the fire. " You, okay?"

"I've never been better." She tells him, " She allows the throw to drop to the floor, revealing her nude body.

" You are something special." He tells her, As they lowered themselves to the quilt.

Stella lay on her back and Kelly lay beside her, propped up on his left arm and elbow. Her hair was spread across the pillow. The firelight flickered over her face. Her eyes sparkled. " You are beautiful." He tells her. They kissed. Kelly softly bit her lower lip, then traced his tongue over her lips. She caressed his face. "I can't believe you leave in two days." He said softly.

She gave him a sad smile, " Let's not focus on that tonight." She pulled him to her, their lips softly touching. Their tongues probed each other's mouths. He caressed her breasts, massaging them, tracing around her areola with his fingertip. She placed her hand behind his head and pulled him toward her breasts. He began caressing them with his tongue, going from her left to her right breast. She directed him to her right one, pulling him to her with her left hand, massaging her breast into his mouth with her right. "That feels so good," she whispered

Kelly sucked the areola gently. This caused the nipple to harden. He caressed it with the flat of his tongue. He could feel the puffiness of the areola as Stella pushed her mound into his mouth. She was feeding her breast to him. He sucked a bit harder as he felt her body begin to respond. Her hips moved slightly as she moaned. After a bit, he released her from his mouth. he traced around the areola with his tongue.

"Hmmm." she sighed. He moved to her other breast and continued sucking, licking, teasing, and caressing her areola and nipple. There was such a softness to her skin and yet her breast was firm. He could feel the mound responding to his attention as she massaged it, pushing it up and into his waiting lips. He began to suck harder. milked her using the flat of his tongue.

After a few more minutes, Stella released the pressure of her hand, pulling him into her breast. He rose to her and kissed her lips. She smiled. "I wish there was some way I could tell you what that feels like." She's not sure why but this time feels different than the last few times they've had sex.

"Well, I wish there was some way I could tell you what it feels like to me. I love the way you feel." Kelly too noticed that this was more intimate than the last few times. He feels different too.

They kissed. "But I'm not finished." He moved down to her breast and sucked each one gently. Then, he slowly moved down her stomach, caressing her legs with his right hand. He moved down her left leg and back up slowly. As he moved down her right leg, she spread her legs apart. He lowered his head to lay a kiss just above her pubic mound. He kissed down her right leg, his tongue lightly dancing over her skin. He moves up, nibbling her inner thigh.

Stella spread her legs far enough for him to roll between them. He made circles with his tongue down her left leg. As he moved back up, she reached down, grasping his head, pulling him into her. She was moist and swollen. he extended his tongue and licked her. "Oh," she sighed as her body flinched at his touch. She pulled him into her. His tongue slides between her labia. He began moving up and down.

Kelly pushed his tongue inside her. She lifted her hips, inviting him to delve as deeply as he could. He moved his tongue in and out, licking up and down. He began drinking the fluid that began to flow from within her. " Baby, ...

He moved his attention to her clit. "Yes baby," she moaned again. After teasing her hardening clit, making circles around it, and licking over it with the flat of his tongue, she cums... " Damn, baby... That was so good." She moans.

Kelly raised to her, his body laying over hers. Their eyes locked and he leans forward resting his head on her forehead. " You, okay?"

" Yeah... "

He kisses her. " Keep your eyes locked on mine, let our bodies be our guide."

Stella bit her lip, and as she stared into his eyes, she felt like he was seeing her soul.

She raised her hips from the floor. He gently guided the tip of his dick into her wet and warm opening. As he pushed in, she met his movements by pushing up. He pushed the entire length into her. She was tight around him.

"Oh, my lord," she moaned. "Oh, my."

He leaned in to kiss her, and she wrapped her legs around his thighs, resting her feet inside his knees. She began to move up and down. Her muscles encircled his dick and began milking it.

"Mmmmm," Kelly moaned into the kiss. He rose, pulling out almost all the way, then slowly pushed in, a fraction of an inch at a time. He could feel the tightness grasping him. He pushed in until his dick pressed against her clit.

"Ahhh," she moaned. He began to move against her, using his body to stimulate her clit. He would pull out, then push in, pressing against her. Her movements only enhanced the sensation she felt and the stimulation he felt. He could feel her responding as her movements increased. "Oh, oh.." she sighed into their kiss.

He slowed his movements, pulling out, trying to prevent her from cumming. He wanted to make this last as long as possible. Their eyes still locked on each other "You feel good, so good." She tells him.

"You feel incredible." He whispered as he slowly pushed in again. "I can feel how warm you are."

"Me, too," she said, nodding, biting her lower lip. He pulled out again, pushing in all the way. He could feel the tip of his dick pressing against her cervix. Their movements continued. Again, she seemed to be approaching an orgasm. He slowly pulled away from her, looking into her eyes.

"You know, you are driving me crazy," she said. She smiled, "But I love it." He pushed in again. She rose to meet him. She reached down and placed her hands behind his waist, just above his hips. She pulled him into her, holding him, forcing his body against her, forcing him into her depths. He began to make short, deep thrusts. She cried out. Her body began to shake. Her legs closed against his thighs. "Oh, yes. Like that." He increased the speed of his movements. He pushed deep within her, his dick pressing against her clit.

"Ahhhhhh," she cried out. She pushed against him, moving up and down rapidly. Her body spasmed. She raised her head, burying her face into his chest. "Oh, oh, oh..." she moaned. He increased the speed and the length and force of his thrusts.

Stella continued to cum as he thrust into her. "Ah, ah, ah," she moaned between short, quick breaths. " Stella, baby look at me." She slowly looks at him "Keep your eyes locked on me, baby... I want to look into your eyes when I cum." She smiles and bites her lip.

He felt her vaginal muscle spasm and close around his dick. As he moved in and out, they stroked his dick. The head was grasped in her wetness. He pushed against the depths of her pussy. He could feel the pressure growing in his lower body. The sensation of his dick was electric. He felt the orgasm grow. Suddenly, the floodgates opened. "Ahhhhh," He moaned as he increased his speed. Stella was pushing up to meet his thrusts. As her orgasm reached high intensity, he exploded into her.

After what seemed like an unending series of spasms forcing spurt after spurt of his seed into her the force weakened. Stella slowed her thrusts. They were both breathing heavily. Her eyes were closed. Her tongue caressed her lips. He leaned down, kissing her, their tongues playing with each other.

"Hmmm," He was able to moan. Stella opened her eyes and looked into Kelly's. She smiled. She blew out her breath.

"Wow," she said. "That was unbelievable,"

Kelly could only nod. He slowly pulled out of her, He lay beside Stella, his right leg laying between her legs. He pulled her close to him holding her tightly.

" What was that?" She questioned.

" Something I've never experienced before." He tells her honestly.

They both lay there as they replayed in their minds what had just happened. They breathed together. They sighed together. For several minutes they melded into one person. For that moment there was no time, no world outside. There were just the two of them, together in the warmth of the fire and the passion of their love. They released the hold they had on each other. Kelly grabbed the throw Stella had on earlier and covered them up. They embraced, lying beside each other. Stella closed her eyes as she rested against Kelly. He closed his, feeling her hair against his face. For an hour, they enjoyed the quietness of the wood cracking in the fire.

Keely finally opened his eyes. He realized he had gone to sleep. Stella was looking at me, smiling. "You snored," she said with a giggle.

"Sorry,"

"Don't be. I just hope it was me that made you sleep that hard."

"Yes, ma'am, it is your fault. You drained my energy, along with anything else that could be drained." She giggled again. " How about we take a shower and then we can talk if you want "

After their shower, " Here babe," Kelly said, as he threw a shirt at her. " You can just slip on one of my shirts." They came to the cabin straight from the park, not thinking about a change of clothes.

" You keep clothes here?"

" No, I found some clothes in my bag in my car. " Kelly tells her as he slipped on a pair of sweatpants.

"Hmmm. Don't I look hot?" she asked with a laughed

Kelly hugged her, "You would look hot to me wearing a suit of armor."

She smiled, " I wish I'd met you sooner."

" Me too, babe." He kissed her sweetly. He walked her over to the couch, she sat down as he added a log to the fire. He sat down beside her as she curled into his side. " Stella, we don't have to talk about anything you don't want to talk about."

" I want you to know everything I've been through. " She tells him looking up at him. " I like you, Kelly, I do, and if we are serious about this trial period thing. I need you to know everything. I just don't want to lose you, or you to look at me differently."

He lifted her chin, " I'm not going anywhere I promise. I like you more than I've ever liked someone, and I want to know everything about you. The good, the bad, whatever you want to share with me I want to know. And chances are I am going to look at you differently, but not in a bad way more in an inner beauty strength. You're opening yourself up to me, showing me your true self and how strong you are, so yeah I'm probably going to see you differently and it's just going to make me fall harder for you than I already have."

" You're falling for me?" She asked, with tears in her eyes.

" Yeah, I think so. " He kisses her forehead. " I felt something different happen to me while we were having sex like it wasn't just sex like it was...

" More emotional than sex," she said, finishing his sentence. " I felt it too Kelly."

He smiled at her. " It scares me." He admitted.

" I'm scared to." She tells him as she moves to straddle his lap. She kisses him, and he deepens the kiss. " Just hold me." She whispered. As she laid her head on his shoulder. Kelly wrapped his arms around her pulling her as close as possible. He kisses her forehead.

After a few quiet minutes " That night I was telling you about when Paul and his friend attacked me. They didn't get what they wanted."

" They didn't," Kelly said in a shocked tone.

" No, as Paul was about to enter me. The door to my room swung open. When Sonny came in, they all started screaming at each other and I heard Sonny threaten to call the police. He pulled them out of my room. I lay there shaking, so scared of what was about to happen. I heard the yelling and fighting. Then all of a sudden it got quiet. Sonny came into my bedroom and didn't say a word. He untied me and took the tape off my mouth. He left my room shutting the door behind him. I curled up in a ball and cried. I was so scared but yet relieved that they didn't take my virginity. "

Kelly strokes her back lovingly, as she continues to talk. " I stayed in my room all weekend; I didn't eat or talk to anyone. I went to school that Monday came home and went straight to my room. Things changed."

" What do you mean?"

" Sonny was acting different, for almost two months he didn't touch me or look at me. There were no more accidentally groping me. I still felt very uncomfortable with him, especially if we were in the house alone. But he never said or did anything to me. Stacy stayed over one night and Sonny didn't even look at her. I thought maybe he realized what he did was wrong, and changed his ways. "

Kelly was surprised by that, but he had a feeling things for Stella only got worse.

" Stacy and I stayed up talking and laughing till two in the morning. The next morning when I woke up it was after ten, and Stacy was sitting in my chair in my room. She was crying. I asked if everything was ok, and she said she wasn't feeling well and called her mom. I could tell something else was bothering her but she swore she was fine. " She paused, " Stacy's behavior changed, she started missing school and withdrawing from everyone her mom was so worried. I tried to talk to her but she would brush me off. Two weeks later she committed suicide, by taking a whole bunch of pills. " Her voice was breaking as she talked.

Kelly kissed the top of her head. She was crying and he could feel her tears on his chest. " I'm sorry Stella, I'm so sorry." He whispered to her. He hugged her tightly.

" No one could make sense of it; she didn't leave a note or anything. Her mom was devastated, everyone was trying to piece together what she was going through, and trying to understand what made her decision to end her life. But we couldn't think of anything, she was so bubbly, and so outgoing, so easy to get along with, she wanted to be an actress."

Kelly didn't know what to say, so he just held her as she cried about the loss of her friend.

" A month passed and my life was so much different without Stacy. My seventeenth birthday came, my aunt had to work, and Devin had to go out of town for a funeral. So, I was all alone. I stay in my room listening to music, thinking about Stacy. I got ready for bed and went to sleep. I was awoken by Sonny, he climbed into bed with me and said that he had a gift for me. His hand went inside my shorts, and he started rubbing me. I told him I didn't want it, and he said Baby, I've been waiting months to do this. I tried to get up, but he said don't make me do what Paul did to you. " She paused. " I saved you that night, and you never thanked me. Paul hasn't come back because I threatened him. I told him I was going to be your first. I was shaking now, and crying, I kept saying no, you can't do this I told him I would call the cops. He wrapped his hands around my neck and said dead girls can't talk. "

Kelly was getting irritated as she continued to talk, he wants to beat the shit out of this man that caused her so much hurt.

" I was gasping for air, then he whispered, you tell anyone Stacy won't be your only dead friend. He let go of my neck and then massaged it. I don't like hurting you, but you got to behave sweetie. I was so scared Kelly I just laid there letting him touch me and kiss me. I knew he was going to take my virginity and there was nothing I could do. " She swallowed hard. " He removed my shorts and panties. He said I was pissed that Paul and his friend got to taste you before I did. Did your boyfriend taste you yet? I looked down at him and shook my head. He said, Well let's keep it that way. He then started kissing my legs and fingering me, I cried out and he took that as a moan of pleasure and said I knew you liked this stuff, wait till I get my dick inside you. Sweetie, you're going to love my dick, I'll make sure your first time is enjoyable. "

" Stella, "

"Please, I cried, hoping he would feel guilty or something. But my cry only turned him on more, it seemed. I closed my eyes tightly, praying that this was all just a dream. After he got done tasting me, he climbed up my body. Damn, you are so fucking sexy... he whispered, against my neck, as he started kissing it.

I didn't open my eyes, I just lay there crying, As I felt his hand slip into between my thighs again. I want you Stella, He said, in a husky voice that turned my stomach. You know, if by some crazy, chance you do get brave enough to go to the police. Just think about your aunt and Devin. What do you mean? I asked him, finally looking into his cold lifeless brown eyes.

Accident happens all the time at that crazy place your aunt works, she could take an overdose, fall down the stairs, drown, or accidentally cut her wrist. I swallowed hard, as he spoke. And Devin, well. I would hate to see his career cut before he even gets a chance to play... Wouldn't you hate that?

I nodded, Good, we are on the same page, here is how everything is going to go from now on, He stood up, and I just laid there, afraid to move When I get horny, you will willingly give yourself to me. He took his jeans off, then his shirt. I said no, I won't, shaking my head.

He laughed, as he took his boxers off, He roughly pushed two fingers inside of me, making me scream out in pain. See, I can make this very painful for you, he said, as he pulled his fingers out of me. And started to rub my mound softly Calming me down a little. I could be gentle with you, it's your choice. You give me what I want when I want it, and I'll make sure your aunt is taken care of, and that Devin doesn't get his kneecap busted."

I closed my eyes, as he pushed himself into me. It was then that I realized I was stuck, there was nothing I could do, I didn't want to lose my aunt, and I didn't want to be the reason Devin never reached his dreams. So, I laid there and left the son of a bitch to have his way with me.

It went on for months, I pushed everything and everyone away. My aunt became concerned about my behavior and took me to the doctor. As they were running tests, they discovered I was pregnant. "

Kelly's eyes widened. " You had a baby."

Stella looked at him, "Not exactly, I had a miscarriage, my aunt caused me to have a miscarriage. "