This story got a great response and I was excited about this chapter.
One of my favourite parts in TLO was when Nico and Hades showed up to the final battle with Persephone and Demeter and the gods were arguing. I never knew I needed that. Also, I believe Hades is one of the few gods to actually (maybe) care about their kids - at least more than the other gods. All those reasons are why this chapter exists and is my favourite to date.
As I'm typing this chapter, I've started TDP.
Story #3: Family Dinner in the Underworld
Nico found it strange that Hades and Persephone invited him to a family dinner in his palace. His relationship with his father was, he would admit, better than other half-bloods. (Hades got him a car and driver, which is way more than a lot of kids get. He's trying.) And he isn't sure how he is with Persephone since she's confusing. Some days, she likes him and treats him like a stepson whereas other days, she wanted him to stay at Camp and never return. It mostly depends if it's her period in the Underworld.
But when Nico learned that Hazel was also invited, and invited by Hades and not Pluto, he knew nothing would be up, hopefully. If Nico had to guess, Hades and Persephone wanted to meet Hazel personally, more so Persephone. Maybe Persephone was on a stepmother kick.
Nico and Hazel arrived at the palace together, walking through the entry hall. Hazel looked around with childlike wonder at the stone walls and floors, He gave his sister a basic tour, showing her all the important places like the exits. Hazel was fascinated, having never seen such a large brass fountain and doors with so many torches and stairwells. She loved the hallways that were littered with gold and precious flowers and jewels.
Nico could've been walking these halls for the first time and still find his way to the grand dining room. It had nothing to do with the layout. He could hear the wonderful sounds of his father yelling and based on the tone and word choice, he knows who they're aimed at.
"Sounds like Demeter's here," Nico says.
"Who?" Hazel asks.
"Grandma."
Nico smirks as they walk through an ornate doorframe into the dining room. In the centre, a long table draped with a satin red cloth was set with spaced out vases and more plates and cutlery than needed. By the fireplace with Hades's picture above the mantle was Hades himself, looking irritated with Demeter who, as usual, was firing jabs at him. It didn't matter that Hades was one of The Big Three because Demeter was his mother-in-law, a much scarier force.
"You weren't invited!" Hades yells at her.
"Which is why I showed up!" Demeter yells back.
Nico glances at Hazel's face which is shocked. He grins a little because that's only the unexpected appetizer of a whole course to come. They look up when they see Persephone approach them, a graceful being which contrasts the entire Underworld. Hazel's almost entranced by her gracefulness. It's refreshing to see something like that here.
"Welcome, dear children," she greets. "Please, take a seat." She glances at her mother and husband. "Mother, my Lord, stop arguing in front of the children!"
That didn't help. Hades and Demeter were still yelling about her presence at this dinner. Persephone smiles meekly as she looks down at Hazel.
"You must be Hazel," she says, "you look just like your mother."
"Oh…" Hazel mutters, tucking a curl behind her ear. "Thank you."
Nico isn't sure if he should tell her that might not be a compliment. He knows from experience that a big reason why Persephone doesn't like him is that he reminds her of Hades's (or Pluto's) affair with his mother. Maybe Persephone's pleasant because Pluto was technically Hazel's father. Nico won't ruin this seemingly sweet moment for Hazel because she's smiling.
"I brought you something," Hazel says.
"Oh, dear, you didn't have to," Persephone says to be modest.
Hazel pulls a small box out of her pocket and hands it to Persephone. The goddess looks at Hazel skeptically before opening it and gasps. Inside are little red earrings, where the gems are bunched together to resemble small pomegranates. Hazel smiles as Persephone takes off her current gold earrings. Before they came to the palace, Nico told Hazel that Persephone adored her garden and her pomegranates since Hazel didn't want to come empty-handed.
"Rubies?" Persephone asks as she pushes her hair back to put them on.
"Garnet, actually," Hazel responds. She meant for rubies but got garnets instead when she was making earrings. Apparently, they have better hardiness which would benefit the underworld's conditions.
"Trying to win over my wife?" Hades asks rhetorically as he circles Persephone to get a look at Hazel's gift. He raises his brows, impressed.
"Won her over faster than you did," Demeter says getting a glare from Hades.
Hades narrows his eyes. "I don't think she brought you anything."
"Please," Demeter scoffs, "gold and other rich minerals are good for plants. It enriches the soil. She's already giving me more."
"She gets that ability from yours truly."
"Thank the gods that's all she got from you."
Hades balls his hands into fists as Persephone steps forwards, resting a hand on his chest to stop him. She puts her attention on the children as she guides them to the table. Hazel glances at Nico, wondering if she did a good job. Considering that Persephone didn't curse her and Hades and Demeter kept arguing, Nico gives her a thumbs up. They sit at the left side of the table, Hazel is between Hades who sits at the head of the table and Nico who's on her other side. Across from them is Persephone who sits on her husband's other side and Demeter who's on her daughter's other side.
As some servants bring their food on silver platters, Nico can't help but notice that the flower arrangements on the table are dandelions. Knowing that Persephone decorated, he knows she did this purposely, especially since she's smirking at him when he looks over at her.
"Nico, do you like the flowers for tonight?" Persephone asks although she knows the answer. She twirls her fork in her hand.
"No," Nico responds.
"Nico," Hades states angrily.
"I picked them exactly for you," Persephone says.
"I don't care," Nico frowns.
"Nico," Hades grumbles this time.
"I like them!" Hazel exclaims to lighten the mood. "They're very bright."
"Unlike your brother," Persephone scoffs. "He might've preferred black dahlias."
Nico is about to argue when he lifts the cover on his platter and sees corn under there. Great. Another stupid plant he was turned into. Tonight isn't his night at all.
"Triptolemus said you fancied corn so I grew some for you," Demeter tells him. "Eat up. You're too skinny."
Nico suddenly loses his appetite. If he was once a corn plant, is it cannibalism if he eats corn?
"I'll have some," Hazel says excitedly. "Can we start eating?"
"Yes, dear child," Demeter responds as if she owns the palace which, in hindsight, she does.
Nico has never been more offended by Hazel in his whole life. It's tied with Demeter making everyone's first course as a steaming cob of corn.
"Why are we having such a basic food as the appetizer?" Hades asks.
"Corn is nutritious!" Demeter yells at him. "You and your boy look malnourished."
Persephone and Hazel didn't object. The two women just ate their corn in peace. Hades and Nico, both skinny and pale, glanced at each other and didn't know what Demeter was talking about.
"I'm one of the Big Three, in case you forgot," Hades tells Demeter, standing up to dramatically prove his point.
Demeter doesn't even look up from her plate. "You're not a doctor, lawyer, or a gardener. Sit down."
Hades sits. Hazel bites down on the corners of her mouth to hold back laughter. She and Nico meet eyes for a second and he's grinning underneath his messy hair.
"Persephone could've married the god of doctors," Demeter says. "She should be making better choices."
Persephone rolls her eyes. "Mother, your cabin at the Camp is nearly full. You're not one to talk about better choices in suitors."
Hazel and Nico didn't think they would be this entertained at the family dinner. They didn't know what to expect before coming here. On the way, when Hazel asked about Persephone, Nico told her the basics: Persephone ate pomegranate seeds to escape her overbearing mother. Now, Hazel sees and understands. Now, they're entertained by the drama.
Demeter looks at her daughter offended. "How dare you tell me how to live my life when you're married to a bum?"
Persephone doesn't even bother dealing with her mother. She turns away from Demeter and looks at Nico. "So, Stepson, what are you up to now?"
"Counsellor at Camp and Pluto's Ambassador to New Rome," Nico responds.
Demeter nods proudly before looking at Hades. "See, your son has two jobs. You can't even have one."
Hades narrows his eyes but tries a calm approach to deal with his mother-in-law. "I'm Lord of the Underworld. My life is my job."
"Thanatos does all the work and everyone knows. We also know you're scared of Tartarus. You don't man up since you're too busy making half-blood children to screw up."
"Agreed," Persephone chants. She glances at Nico and Hazel, not apologizing for offended them if she did. Instead, Nico and Hazel are so entertained by their father getting torn to shreds by Demeter.
"I've given your daughter so much fertile land for her crops," Hades tells her. "Persephone has a beautiful garden in her wing."
Nico facepalms and notices Hazel looking at him inquisitively. "Goddess of agriculture."
"Right…" Hazel nods before facepalming. She hopes Hades sees their reactions.
Demeter gives Hades a dirty look. "Did you forget who I am?"
Hades gives a shrug that says he wishes he forgot who she was. He looks over at his kids when he notices Hazel poking his wrist with a fork to get his attention.
Hazel cups a hand to cover her mouth so the goddesses don't see or hear her. "You tried."
Nico laughs loudly so the goddesses see and hear him. "You really tried."
Persephone smiles a little, sipping her pomegranate wine from a golden chalice. "He tries daily. And you, stepdaughter, what do you do?"
"I have a real job," Hazel states proudly. "I'm a praetor in New Rome."
Nico raises his butter knife. "And I'm a Counsellor and an ambassador for both camps."
Hazel frowns at him. "You already said that."
Nico nods, sitting back and putting his feet on the table. "I'm showing you how they repeat arguments as if they've never had them. It's great when it doesn't make you want to rip your ears off. Watch this, sis."
Hazel looks back at the table and sees Demeter giving Hades another one of her signature dirty looks.
"See?" Demeter says to him, gesturing a hand towards Nico and Hazel. "Your ten-year-old children have jobs unlike you."
Hazel clears her throat. "Miss. Demeter, we're not -"
Hades slams his fists on the table, startling Hazel. She feels some gems spurt out of her pockets and bounce on the floor. Hazel and Nico look over. He lowers his feet to help her kick those under the nearest throw rug.
"I run the whole Underworld!" Hades yells for the second time tonight.
Persephone looks at Nico. "Aren't you the only one in my Lord's cabin?"
"Yeah," Nico responds.
"Then it's not a real job if you're the only one, minus Hazel if she visits."
Nico slams his fist on the table as he jumps up onto his chair, purposely mocking his father who's grinning like he was the whole night. "I run the whole cabin! Watching myself is a full-time job I don't even do correctly … and we don't even have worker's benefits."
Demeter puts a hand on her heart. "Oh, you poor, poor boy for being all alone and working in those unfavourable conditions." She glares at Hades again. "Mealtime must be so difficult for you at your table."
Hazel laughs but covers her mouth because it's full of corn. "He has a doctor's note to sit with the Apollo kids. He told me Chiron didn't bother arguing him on it."
Hades looks at his son betrayed. Nico shrugs. Maybe if Hazel was there, they'd sit at the Hades table but he'd bring her along to sit with the Apollo kids.
Demeter's hand is still on her heart. "You poor, poor child. No wonder you're not eating. Go sit at my table."
"Then he'd really be a poor, poor boy…" Hades mumbles under his breath. Persephone smiles at him despite her siblings being insulted.
Demeter glares at them. "He's only a poor boy because Persephone wasn't around to fondle your pomegranates so you found someone else."
Hades has never looked so mortified in his entire life.
"Mother!" Persephone yells. Her eyes widen and cheeks reddened with either rage or embarrassment. The kids couldn't tell. "Not in front of the children!"
Demeter shrugs, swatting her off. "Ah, they're his kids. They've heard worse things."
Hazel and Nico nod. They've heard, seen, and experienced worse things than hearing fruit euphemisms to describe a part of their father's life they never want to think about. Still, seeing Hades and Persephone so livid about it makes hearing that worth it.
"Now look," Persephone says, gesturing to Nico and Hazel who still have corn on their plates, "the children have lost their appetite."
"We never had one," Nico says. He and Hazel have been too busy listening to Demeter and Hades scream at each other. Besides, the corn got cold.
"You know what," Hades starts, throwing the napkin he had on his lap on the table dramatically, "this dinner is over. Nico, Hazel, thank you for stopping by."
"No, wait." Nico stands, his chair scooting back, "I have a plan. We just need a change of venue and Jules-Albert."
-o-
Jules-Albert pulled up in Nico's carriage the moment he was summoned. Persephone and Demeter took the front seat, beside Jules-Albert. Nico tried to argue that it was his car so he should get a front seat but Demeter was already giving Hades a lot for "giving a baby a car" despite Hades making rational arguments that Nico is a teenager and not even driving. So Nico and Hazel ended up in the backseat with Hades sandwiched between them.
It doesn't help that Hazel asked for a car too. She said that Pluto always gave her birthday gifts and Nico wouldn't share Jules-Albert with her.
Jules-Albert never complained about the family fiasco as they made their way to the nearest McDonalds in the mortal world.
"So, what do we look like?" Nico asks Hazel. He's leaning over Hades' lap to whisper ask her.
"I gave us a cream-coloured 1940s Hudson convertible," Hazel responds, leaning on Hades' lap to respond.
"Sweet." Nico was grateful that Hazel could manipulate the Mist. If left up to the Mist, they would've probably been in a lame minivan like actual mortal families.
"Children, I require space," Hades says, pushing both their heads back into their seats.
"McDonalds?" Demeter asks offended to be on the lot as Jules-Albert joins the drive-thru line. She puts a hand to her mouth as if she was about to hurl which Hades appreciated.
"I like it here," Nico says. "You said I needed to eat more."
"Real. Food," Demeter stresses.
"This is real food!" Nico says. "Maybe…"
"Oh!" Persephone exclaims. "Let's get McFlurries."
"Now you're talking, Stepmother."
Demeter looks at them with disgust as Jules-Albert pulled up to the order kiosk. Nico stretches his tiny body over Hades again and yells their order. Hades plugs his ears and puts Nico back in his seat, buckling his seatbelt against his will.
"Our ice cream machines aren't working," the cashier tells them.
"Typical," Nico states. When does it ever work?
Persephone gasps. "My Lord, do something!"
Hades frowns at the kiosk and curses the location with the entire establishment. Nico and Hazel laugh but stare in horror when Demeter, for once, seconds it. Hades stops his rampage and is surprised when he sees his wretched mother-in-law agreeing with him. Nico thinks that maybe the ice cream machine never works because a god cursed it, and when a god can't get their ice cream, they curse it. A torturous cycle like Sisyphus and his rock. No wonder nobody ever gets ice cream from here. It's another stupid chicken-and-egg dilemma. It's better since it spooked his father.
Persephone applauds, never having thought she'd see the day where her mother and husband agreed on something and her stepchildren were scarred.
Nico clears his throat. "He means he'll change it to a smoothie."
"Fine," Persephone says disappointed.
After driving around back and getting their order, Demeter turns around and sees Nico and Hazel with chicken McNuggets happy meals with coffee while Persephone is sipping a pomegranate-blueberry smoothie (which she happily took over the McFlurry). Demeter didn't want anything since she was against the idea of McDonalds and Hades didn't encourage her since he wouldn't have paid for her order.
"You gave them coffee?" Demeter asks. "They're five!"
"I have a hard job," Hazel argues.
"Me too," Nico says, taking a nugget and dipping it into his coffee. He laughs when Hazel tries the combination herself and likes it.
Demeter rolls her eyes, giving up on those kids and their father. Hades silently cheers from the backseat, finally happy to get that goddess off his back. Feeling victorious, Hades tries to steal a fry from Nico and a nugget from Hazel only to get his hands smacked by both of them. Ungrateful kids, especially since he paid for those meals. Instead, they give him their happy meal toys which were a miniature knockoff Barbie and a small race car with flames painted to the sides.
"So thoughtful," Hades says with a sour taste in his mouth.
I miss McDonalds. They should've sponsored me for this chapter.