Belle approached the library with her steps jaunty from last night's intimate conversation. She was starting to warm up to Rumple…her body. After their talk, she'd kissed him like Wednesday had kissed Tyler in that Netflix show. Only, instead of having a vision of Rumple with blood on his mouth, she felt immense stirrings in her southern regions.
Her body had screamed for more, the more she'd kissed him. She'd torn Rumple's shirt off and felt his bare chest. In fact, she'd kissed it then given him a deep, hungry French kiss. He'd been moaning under her mouth, but he'd also held firm as if he knew she was going to stop.
Which she'd had to because horrible memories of Regina's abuse had broken through the excitement of the kisses. Memories that felt like weapons flaying her, destroying the mood.
If she could keep them at bay long enough, she'd probably be ready to "sleep" with Rumple, but she knew overcoming Regina's abuse was one of the obstacles. However, she felt like she was physically ready to take that step.
She wanted Rumple naked in her hands. It had nothing to do with what she felt she ought to want. Like her dad telling her she needed to give her body to Gaston because she owed it to Maurice to be Gaston's sex toy. She never wanted to see Gaston naked—in fact, she'd dreaded the wedding night so badly that when she was engaged to Gaston, she'd spent every night scratching subconsciously at her wrists as she longed for a loophole to get that noose off her neck. She'd been sure when he tried to join their bodies, she wouldn't be able to sit like a good rag doll and let it happen like her father wanted her to. No, she was sure she'd be reaching for a knife and stabbing Gaston, screaming at him to get back. And it wouldn't be Belle acting while thinking but her emotions emasculating her because…
…she really didn't want to be Gaston's good little housewife.
To think her father expected her to sit there and let that pig have his way with her, to know her father knew she wasn't attracted to him, made her wish he weren't her father.
She didn't want to lay eyes on him here. Aside from Regina, her father was the second person she was avoiding at all costs. She didn't want him to pretend to love her anymore. Because he most certainly did not.
No, Rumple loved her. Any other man would have gotten excited over her kisses last night and assumed it was "the night". But Rumple had known it wasn't, and he wasn't disappointed in her at all. He'd done nothing but show her love.
She giggled to herself, remembering back when she was his servant and he'd removed Sheriff of Nottingham's tongue for demanding Rumple give her to him to use as he wanted. Rumple had defended and protected her. Gaston probably would've let the sheriff have her for an hour. Heck, her father certainly would…
She forced those horrible thoughts away and focused on her happiness with Rumple. Remembered how happily playful Debra was this morning and how excited she'd been to go on her walk. Dragging Belle after a squirrel and skinning her knee, yes, but that dog was so happy it was hard to reprimand her. She was stronger than Belle; she couldn't help that squirrels made her forget to be good.
Reaching in her tiny purse for the key, Belle strutted gaily in her heels…
…and she saw the library's door was wide open.
Abigail massaged her foot under the table as she sat at a booth at Granny's Diner. The strappy high heel that belonged on that foot was in her lap. Frederick, Cinderella, and Thomas were her current company. It was early in the morning; Thomas had a grueling work day, but he was having breakfast with them. Or, rather coffee. None of them were quite hungry yet and had miffed Granny by ordering only coffees.
"You nitwits, double-crossing needles," she grouched. "Don't fill your bellies with some good bacon, and a wind will come and knock you into Kansas." But she sat their coffee mugs on the table all the same. Sniffing like she was too good to serve them.
It couldn't have been more apparent that Granny had just cleaned the place before unlocking the door. The floors had obviously newly been mopped—shiny and satiny, the only dirt to be found were the new prints left by Abigail's high heels and the other three's sneakers. Not a speck of dust could be seen, lingering like a bunny playing dead. The tables lacked the smallest crumb or splotch from spilled liquid.
Abigail couldn't help turning her lips downward briefly, recalling how David had tried to tell her he wasn't in the mood for adult relations but she'd insisted. Then the false alarm, the possibility of a pregnancy then the happiness that drained her of energy when she saw the negative result.
Of course, only cursed and confused Abigail would insist a man get down and dirty with her when his words and body language said he didn't want to. Even so, she wanted to kick herself, for now she had the real memory of Snow's husband…naked…and her trying to please him but really only pleasing herself. Cringey as hell…
She did not want to reflect on the horrors if she'd actually been pregnant with David's child. How messy things would be when they got their memories back. The realization that she and David were the ones who were really cheating on the married couple. And Frederick! They hadn't wed yet, were just enjoying being a couple for a few years. But how complicated it'd be if she and David hadn't terminated the pregnancy or put the child up for adoption then realized what the truth was…
She bit her bottom lip, kneading her palm against her bare heel and nearly purring from how good it felt. She was sure the kid would be able to handle learning his parents weren't in love, but it'd be the craziest set of double families. And how much angrier she'd be at Regina for posing as her friend when the sick, psychopathic woman kept encouraging her to stay with David…knowing Kathryn was not his true love. Knowing Snow White was.
Regina had been full of shit. She had never cared about Kathryn. Nah, all she'd cared about was making people miserable. Abigail would hate herself if she were like Regina, but Abigail had no fear of becoming such a miserable, heartless, unloving woman. Abigail was the woman who snuck David to safety when she knew he didn't want to marry her. Not the one who beheaded him because she knew he didn't want to marry her. Even as Kathryn, while she'd tried to believe their relationship was real, it didn't take her too long to accept their relationship was a travesty. Nor did it take her long to realize she didn't want to block David from being with the woman he truly loved.
Seeing the love in David's eyes for Snow—and Snow's eyes for him—had touched her in a sweet way. She hadn't wanted to crush them. She merely wished she had someone like that…
…and to come "awake" and realize she did and jump into his arms the moment she found him was happiness such as she had never known as Kathryn. Simple joy, yet powerful all the same. Abigail knew Regina didn't want that. Nothing made that woman happier than knowing other people were miserable because she made them that way. She went out of her way to destroy happiness because it made her feel like a goddess when she believed she succeeded.
They were the only customers currently in the place. Most people in Storybrooke preferred to swing in around seven. But Grumpy trudged through the building at that moment. Sleepy was following but not very well. He kept tripping over his own feet and slumping to the floor. Curling into a fuzzy ball.
Bashful and Doc, who were behind him, rushed to tug him to his feet and help him on his way. Doc shot a reprimanding look at Grumpy's back, but Grumpy was plainly not in a good mood, for whatever reason. Abigail watched the dwarves make their way to the bar, her lips pursed slightly.
Unbeknownst to her, Grumpy had had a very sweet dream about Nova. Being in his arms on a mattress nailed to a boat wall. Not quite big enough to be a ship, yet the two of them were sleeping in a room under the deck. He didn't have a shirt on; they were sharing a sheet as clothing. And the way she smiled at him when her eyelids parted…
…well, it wasn't fair that it wasn't real. A foolish dream. He couldn't shake the memory of making tears plunge down her cheeks when he told her what that stupid blue gnat told him.
"So, does anyone think Snow and Emma are still alive?" Thomas wondered, pulling Abigail's gaze from the dwarves. "The people I work with told me they think the only reason we haven't returned to Misthaven is because it doesn't exist anymore."
"He says, she says," murmured Abigail as she stuffed her foot back in her high heel. The smart woman sat up straight and asserted, "I don't think it makes an iota of sense for us to have returned just because the curse was broken. But who says that's where they landed? They could be in some barbaric world, for all we know.
"Whether they have a chance of returning…" she mused, pressing her forefinger against her lips. "Is anyone's guess. But as we had to bury Snow's husband, I'm not sure she'd be happy here. Maybe the other world is where she's meant to be."
"If they don't come back," Frederick speculated, "what's going to happen to Henry?"
Cinderella winced. "Hate to say it, but he's twelve anyway. He's only got one-third of his life left being that devil woman's legal property." She stretched her limbs, glad to be free of her one-year-old daughter for a few minutes and hanging out with grown-ups. The ice cream lady, Ingrid, had offered to watch the baby, and Cinderella had gladly surrendered Alexandra. "He'll be okay, if Emma can't return. But will she?" Cinderella's nose burned as she recalled the only reason she got to keep her daughter. Because Emma made a deal with Mr. Gold.
She wished she could help Emma, but how could she, when she didn't even know what world she was in? Plus, she didn't have the slightest idea how to find a portal.
"Why is Granny serving us?" wondered Cinderella suddenly. "Granny, where's Red? I feel like I haven't seen her in two weeks, though goodness knows, I'm so busy I can't keep track of time…"
Granny strode to their booth and hovered menacingly over them like a vulture that ate the wrong carcass and it was Cinderella's fault. "I haven't seen hide nor hair of that wolf since a week and a half ago. Little Miss Short Skirts just…up and left me one day…just vanished into thin air in the middle of work." She swiped her left arm in front of her chest before returning the tips of those fingers to the tabletop.
"I tell you," she growled like a grizzly, "that woman finally had a seizure and recalled her plans to sleep her way through Boston. Before my pretty little heart attack made her decide to stay and treat me like I had her caged because of it. You won't see Red…for probably six months or so. Let her get this crap out of her system then come crying home so I can tell her, 'I told you so.'" Then she marched off again, going to make the dwarves their breakfast.
Grumpy only asked for coffee too, but the other three dwarves wanted a good breakfast. Grumpy wasn't hungry. He was trying to keep his rage simmering so that he wouldn't feel the sadness he was shoving away. The sadness that wanted desperately to seep in. As if his sadness was ocean water trying to save a beached whale but being unable to reach it.
He pictured his sadness as an infuriating rascal trying to headbutt him as he held his fist against the kid's head to prevent him from getting any closer. Then he pictured himself sailing in a boat and some dude in a Rolls-Royce (Rumplestiltskin?) seeing that. Their jaw dropping, sunglasses sliding off their nose, and them sliding their fancy car off the dock and into the water because they've lost control of the wheel. Amazed thoroughly by his cool boat and inflamed with such jealousy their nerves got backed up.
And there was a flock of ducks mingling with some swans in the water. Pointing their feathers toward the Rolls-Royce and laughing on quacks. Like it was the most ridiculous car they'd seen. But they'd love Grumpy's boat so much they'd want to move in.
Grumpy would wave at the driver with a smirk then take the stairs below the deck, securing the trapdoor above him. Under the deck, he'd find fireflies and…
No, he didn't want to think about that. Nova looked positively miserable under the old gnat's care. The Ageless Blue Fairy, who may have been an Aes Sedai in another world, was no queen of kindness. Grumpy got the distinct impression Nova no longer wanted to be a fairy godmother.
But he would never hear her say such because every time he almost got close enough to have a conversation with Nova, Blue escorted him away before he could finish the word "Hello".
"How dare you try to distract her?" she admonished every time she had Grumpy five feet out of Nova's earshot. She didn't mind if "humans" overheard her conversation because she expected them to be on her side. "Being a fairy godmother and helping humans find their happiness is a better life for her than…" She made a face and picked lint from his shirt, a snobby scowl on her lips. "Sailing with a dirty man. But every time she sees your face, she gets excited, thinking she can go off on a banal journey and have a midlife crisis when her real life hasn't begun. And if you keep badgering her, it never will. You're the drug that will ruin her life…for a dream." Folding her arms over her chest, she looked at him churlishly time and again. "Go on," she ordered while tapping her foot. "Git."
He tried to ask her once, "By this time, don't you think the only reason I can't stop thinking about her might be that I do love her and genuinely want to be with her?"
"No," Blue answered cruelly. "You're nothing but a stalker. If a stalker gets what he 'dreams' about, he's not going to be happy. He'll drag her down with him." Pressing his chest with her forefinger, she says, "That has you written all over it, dear."
He'd been livid. "Well!" he barked. "You sure as heck don't want to make her happy. Keep yapping about how she owes it to you to fix the humans. The hell with the humans! Do you fricken care if she's happy, or are you as sadistic as Regina? Do you thrive on her misery?" He was breathing like a bull. "Because Nova is a sweet soul with a heart of gold…and you're trying to squash that sweetness out of her to make her lose her personality! I want her to keep it! How the eff does that make me a stalker, you dumb broad?"
Several people were clapping at that point, whistling and egging him on. "You told her!" But Blue didn't flush with rage or anything. She just smiled an infuriating smile and said, "You only talk to me like that…because you know," she held her closed fist against his cheek, "Nova is in here. And she's not coming out."
It was that moment when Snow had appeared. Taking Grumpy from Blue, she led him to a forest clearing and had a good chat with him to calm him down. Why she trusted the Blue Fairy so blindly was beyond Grumpy's knowledge. She completely believed Blue always did the right thing and had the correct idea on what to do in every situation. But as she told Grumpy, he also had a right to be upset with Blue.
She had massaged his hands with hers and said all the words that would tear him away from his dark feelings of wringing Blue's neck. Help him breathe more calmly.
It was a gift Snow had. Though she had no magic, she was still magical. A lot of people, when trying to comfort others out of their bad moods, made things worse. Not Snow. Not his favorite friend.
He had huffed at her, "But if dwarves are incapable of love, why do I love you as a friend? I really do. And I do love Nova. I want what's best for her, what would make her the happiest she can be. I really believe she'd love sailing with me."
Snow had looked very unhappy when she admitted, "She would. She wants nothing more than that. In fact, I think her dreams of being a fairy godmother are gone. I don't understand why Blue doesn't just let her go, but there must be a very good reason for it."
"Oh, but she took Tinker Bell's wings from her because she didn't like her having a different opinion? Face it, Snow. Blue's a control freak. If anybody's got stalker vibes, it's her. Stalkers just want to control people. I don't want to control Nova. I just want to make her smile and laugh at my jokes. Feel glad to be alive because I added warmth to her life."
"That does sound like love," Snow said wistfully, "and I disagree with Blue. I do think you love her."
"But what does it matter?" he'd asked her miserably. "She's Blue's slave."
Snow had looked ten years older that moment. Tired and drained, wanting to believe in Blue but hearing the facts Grumpy spoke. "Maybe fairies are different than humans on the inside," she supposed.
"And dwarves too? Come on, Snow." Snow flinched and thrust her knuckle at her skirt to make it fly fancily in the air for a second. "That's an abuse excuse. Sure, maybe I am a little different. I'm born with a beard. And we're not so innocent when we're born. We're not…easy for predators to abuse and manipulate with their evil souls. So yeah, I guess we are different, but why is Blue Fairy the happiness police who thinks a species that thrives on destroying each other is more deserving of happiness than fairies and dwarves? The hell is up with that?"
Snow had taken his hands in hers and caressed them in a grip full of friendly love. "Yes, you're right. Life isn't fair, and Blue is terrible to you. But remember one thing." She brought his hands up to her face and smiled at him. "You have friends. Your brothers. Me."
"Belle," he added.
"Belle?" Snow furrowed her brow. "Who's that?"
"Never mind, just a girl I occasionally cross paths with, and seeing her is seeing a friend."
"Oh. Well, see? And Blue neither has nor wants friends. She might be Mother Superior, but in matters of the heart, if you guys were in a battle, she'd lose. Because she doesn't love me or you or anyone or anything. Says dwarves are incapable of love, but she really means she is incapable of love. So don't you fret over her saintly attitude. You're lovable and loving."
"Thank you, Snow," he said softly, "but I still wish we could free Nova from house arrest…or convent arrest, more honestly. But thank you, for you made me feel better about being…hopeless."
That had been the night before Snow had vanished in the portal. All Grumpy hoped every day was that she would reappear in Storybrooke sometime and they could celebrate her being alive still.
…or did he really want that? His heart wrenched as he knew how heartbroken she'd be to learn of Charming. She'd told Grumpy before the curse Charming was the person who made her truly happy to be alive in a way she hadn't been until she'd found love in his heart. "It was the moment I began living." After the Medusa incident, she'd been very protective of her husband for days, kicking herself for nearly losing him in her desperation to get rid of Regina.
Grumpy wasn't sure if she'd be happier dead than in Storybrooke, aware of her deceased husband. Maybe it was kinder to hope she never returned and to just remember what a wonderful friend she was to him. Because he sure as heck didn't want her miserable.
But maybe she'd accept this was what happens when you have a cruel enemy like Regina. People you love deeply get killed. And if you weren't watching them like a hawk, ready to release an arrow, you couldn't protect them.