This chapter exists because imagine the power Reyna would have if she wore a matching Hawaiian shirt.
Story #11: The Athena Parthenos Trio Gets Matching Shirts
Nico was shadow-travelling but stopped when exhaustion hit him. He's known from early shadow-travel experiences, even recent ones, that he didn't want to pass out somewhere he couldn't leave. Presently, he wounded up in an oasis in the middle of a forest. It was beautiful and relaxing enough for him to take a break until he was energized enough to continue travelling.
He was standing on a rocky cave cliffside. When he looks over, he sees a vast body of water below, in a shade of bright blue that almost looked fake. It was surrounded by a rocky bowl connected to the cave he was standing on covered in fragments of green vegetation that branched out to the surrounding forest.
The trees look like palm trees which, combined with the humid heat, rushing waterfall, and pricking sweat from his face, tells Nico he's somewhere tropical.
"Your pale-as-pale-gets skin will burn."
With his hand gripped on his sword, Nico turns around and sees Clovis lounging in a lawn chair deeper into the cave, fanning himself with a giant palm leaf with a fruity drink on a small table beside him. Nico loosens his grip as he walks over to Clovis who's insistent that he puts on sunscreen. He doesn't put any on and decides to take his chance with the sun when and if he decides to step outside.
"What are you doing here?" Nico asks.
"All you ever have to do is wake up and go to sleep," Clovis answers without answering the question. "Everything else is optional. Go say hello to the others and thank me later."
"Others?"
Clovis pauses, pointing out towards the water with his palm-leaf before fanning himself. Nico walks over and peeks over the edge, seeing someone floating in the water. Whoever that is wasn't there before.
Nico runs down the rocky steps until he's at the edge of the water. He notices someone floating in the middle of the water in a giant neon pink flamingo floatie. Once the plastic bird slowly turns around against the calm waters, Nico thinks for a second that it's Reyna but it couldn't be. Reyna wouldn't be caught dead floating on a flamingo while wearing a bright orange short-sleeved shirt with a palm tree/parrot/pineapple pattern all over, and to top the outfit off, big sunglasses with frames resembling a sun.
Then again, what is he doing at a tropical waterfall? At least he could say he shadow-travelled. What's her excuse?
The flamingo stops when Reyna's facing him and her lip twitches a little. Nico can't see her eyes through the sunglasses but he imagines she's made eye contact with him and regrets being seen like this, especially since she looked so relaxed that she might have been enjoying it. It's definitely her.
"We spoke briefly before you passed out on the bird," Nico jokes.
Reyna paddles over to the shoreline with her hands, making more distance than he thought she'd make since the flamingo's bigger than it should be.
"You mean before he dragged me here," Reyna points up to the cave Nico saw Clovis, "whoever that is." She lowers her sunglasses and narrows her eyes up at him. "Not one word about the shirt or I'm drowning you with this flamingo."
"I wasn't thinking of it," Nico says although he really wants to.
"Think about your own instead."
Nico looks down and notices he's wearing the same stupid shirt as Reyna who cackles once his face turns red with mortification instead of potential sunburn. He rips it off and throws it over his shoulder only to find another one there. Even when he tears off more, he's still wearing one. It's a Russian nesting doll of ugly Hawaiian shirts, minus the shrinking with each shirt.
"I've tried that countless times," Reyna says. Her eyes flicker upwards and her expression drops even more. "Oh, gods … of course."
Nico looks over his shoulder and sees Coach Hedge standing at the top of the waterfall, wearing the same stupid shirt as them. As if this moment could get any weirder than Coach rocking tacky Hawaiian swag and his goat legs. Although they've seen that sight before while on their quest to return the Athena Parthenos to Camp Half-Blood, they still can't unsee that sight.
"Sorry for being late," Coach announces to them as if they were expecting him when they weren't, "but when you dress like this, you don't have to be on time."
And Coach dives from the top of the falls. He performs an intricate aerial routine as if he was an Olympic diver performing Cirque du Soleil and mixed-martial arts. The unexpected masterpiece made the Hawaiian shirt and unknown location look normal.
Despite a graceful descent, Coach still managed to break the surface of the water as if he cannonballed. The splash was gigantic and loud, causing the water to expel outwards from where he landed.
Nico raises his arms to brace for impact but still gets soaked (which, admittedly, cooled him off) and Reyna curses as her flamingo floatie veers off course with the impact of Coach's splash. At least she managed to stay afloat. Nico walks over to the edge and holds out his sword. Reyna grabs onto the flat edge as Nico walks back to pull her closer to shore. With his impeccable timing, Coach's head pops out of the water with a cheerful grin.
Nico rips off his Hawaiian shirt since it was drenched and started clinging onto his skin. Thankfully, the new shirt underneath was dry. His hair is dripping onto his shoulders but it doesn't bother him yet.
"Hey, Coach," Nico greets. Reyna grumbles something similar, keeping her soaked shirt on.
"I'm not saying do drugs but you can get to a high without drugs by diving off those falls and closing your eyes," Coach advises as he rolls onto his back and starts floating.
"Noted," Nico nods.
"It's insane how stupid he's considering how smart he is," Reyna says.
"Seems like valid advice. Hey, Coach, where are we?"
"Gatorade Falls, my boy," Coach responds as if he's in paradise.
Nico isn't sure if he's kidding and Reyna's not fazed. " … you're kidding."
"He really isn't," Reyna adds.
"Is this really Gatorade?" Nico asks, a little excited. It makes sense as to why the water is so, so blue it's fake. This could be Coach's healing oasis for his future sports medicine use.
Reyna glances at Nico. "Are you -"
"It is!" Coach yells, gulping some water down by the mouthful.
"- kidding me?" Reyna finishes but her voice dropped in a lack of surprise.
Nico crouches and cups some in his palms to take a sip and it's oddly fruity. He wouldn't drink as much as Coach but that was something he didn't know he was curious about. Nico offers some to Reyna who quickly shakes her head. He bets she got a taste when her floatie almost went capsized.
"I've been meaning to plan a family vacation here and now I definitely will," Coach adds. "You two are invited."
"Sweet," Nico states, unsure why he agreed so contently and quickly. There's something in the water and it's definitely not Gatorade.
"This just became a nightmare," Reyna mutters, looking for a way out of here.
"Why are we here?"
Clovis peeks his head over the cliffside so the others see him. "I was roaming around while dreaming and wound up on a tour of the Cambugahay - definitely pronounced that wrong - Falls, or better known as the Gatorade Falls in the Philippines. I told Coach about it the last time he was at Camp and he wanted to check it out so I brought him."
"That doesn't answer why I'm here," Nico yells.
"Or me!" Reyna yells.
Clovis shrugs before heading back into his cave.
Reyna's about to yell again but sees Coach standing on top of a rock wall about to jump in again. Nico backs away into the greenery as Reyna's eyes widen.
"Someone help me…" Reyna mutters, starting to paddle away from this craziness on her flamingo.
The Gatorade Falls is a real place that I discovered after I planned this chapter so it worked.
Nico, Coach, and Reyna are another iconic trio we needed more content for. I have another chapter planned for them.
There should be another chapter before the end of the year. I'm almost finished it but let's see if I actually work on it.