Considering that I finished and will submit an assignment proposing we read TLT during the final week of classes, I figured that deserves an update for this story.

This is a potential deleted scene in THO, if my memory serves correctly.

Story #22: Peaches Takes the Wheel

Even with the Mist,
Peaches looks like a demon.
Who gave him the keys?

They were on the road for so long, arguing over radio stations that kept on changing when they would cross new small towns or the song would change by the time they thought a debate was over. Or worse, an ad for dry-cleaning. Lester and Meg didn't understand why or how dry cleaning services had so many ads. It didn't help that Peaches was sitting in the backseat screaming peaches at the top of his little demonic Karpos lungs whenever they passed a diner with flashing neon lights enticing them to stop by for a bite. Peaches nearly flew through the roof, literally, when he saw a sign for peach cobbler.

Lester wanted to ask aloud if Peaches salivating over peach cobbler all over the backseat was considered cannibalism but kept it to himself since Peaches is testy that Lester didn't want to, well, test.

Oddly enough, Peaches cheered when the refill light on the control system flashed. Lester didn't want to know why the demon Karpos would be so interested in stopping at a sketchy corner gas station early in the morning but, as with anything Peaches-related, he didn't want to find out.

Once Lester pulls up to a gas pump, he steps out of the car and is about to refill the car since he doesn't trust Peaches in control of anything flammable. He glances over at Meg who got out of the car likely to head into the shop to buy snacks and not pay for the gas.

And as usual, Meg was picking her nose. Lester couldn't think of a time her fingers weren't in her nose. They spend so much time in there that he can't imagine there's anything left to pick.

"Never put your fingers somewhere you wouldn't want your face," Lester proclaims.

Meg pauses, scrunching her face at him. Her nose is on her face. She shrugs it off as another one of his annoying haikus and wipes her fingers on his shirt. Lester shrieks as Peaches cheers from inside the car, growing louder when Lester drops the gas nozzle.

Gods, if the gas he spilt caught a flame. He'd blame Peaches.

"Evening, folks."

Lester and Meg freeze at the sound of someone official. When they turn around, they see an officer circle their car to approach them. Lester and Meg aren't even sure what they did if they even did anything. Wasn't he cursed enough? They just stood here and were refilling their car. Worse comes to worst, Lester's blaming Peaches. It was probably the Karpos's fault anyways.

"Present tense is your best friend when it comes to lying," Meg mutters quickly.

"Do you have a criminal record I don't know about?" Lester asks. "Should I know about it?"

Meg shrugs, eyeing the cop. "It's better to be wanted by the police than not wanted at all."

"That didn't answer my question!"

"Something disturbing you two?" The cop asks.

"Nothing!" Lester exclaims as he hands Meg the gas nozzle to continue filling the car. "I was just giving my friend here some sage advice about never putting your fingers in places you wouldn't want your face."

Lester laughs nervously as he can hear Meg rolling her eyes from behind him. It's a sound he got used to quickly, reminding him of Artemis whenever he would strum his harp throughout Olympus. His twin would always roll her eyes in tune with him which he always found sweet of her before she threw him across the room.

The officer? Not amused.

"Ignore him," Meg says. "Evolution did."

"Ignore her," Lester interjects. "I do."

"I didn't come here to ask whatever you two are doing," the officer says, eyeing them for a bit longer because of their odd behaviour. "I came because of your car."

"What about it?"

"Why is there an infant in the driver's seat?"

Lester and Meg peek inside. For a moment, the Mist flickers to let them view what the officer sees. Peaches is now a human baby, which is somehow more terrifying, naked in the front seat except for a white diaper. The officer probably didn't care about that. It was that Peaches somehow got into the front seat. In the blink of an eye, and thank the gods, Peaches was back to its Karpos form for Meg and Lester.

"Peaches!" Lester exclaims, pretending to be surprised. His stomach churns at pretending Peaches is an adorable baby. He has to stop himself from hurling. "How did you get in there?"

Even Peaches is horrified by Lester's squeaky mommy voice. It didn't help that his Lester voice cracked as if it was experiencing puberty again. Zeus is probably hollering all mighty from his throne. It's not like he knows anything about parenting given that he banished his kid in this ungodly form for something he didn't even do.

"He's just working on those fine and gross motor skills," Lester jokes to the officer. "You know, important steps to proper child development."

Meg puts the gas nozzle back when she finishes filling the car. "What do you know about raising kids?"

The officer nods, eyeing Lester. "Yeah, you do look young."

"Oh, that's not what I meant," Meg states. "He's actually really old and has a cabin full of kids. Some he didn't know existed."

The officer is stunned into silence.

Lester laughs nervously. Why couldn't Meg be preoccupied with digging for gold? "Quiet, Meg. Age happens to everyone. Maturity and wisdom don't. When things are bad, nobody cares if they could've been worse."

"I'm writing you up for being a bad father," the cop says, scribbling on a notepad. He tears the sheet and hands it to Lester.

His only charge is overdue child support fees, whatever that means.

"You better fix that," the officer says, glaring at Lester and the ticket.

"Will do," Lester states.

As the officer leaves, he waves goodbye to fake-human baby Peaches through the window. Peaches waves back, bouncing in the driver's seat and screaming his name as a farewell. Lester wished the officer wrote Peaches up for existing or Meg for always picking her nose.

"That was stupid," Lester comments, crumpling the ticket and shoving it in his pocket. Who was this officer telling him he was a bad parent? As if he could even be called a parent.

Meg snorts a laugh. "You deserve that."

This chapter, that I wrote weeks back, either aged well or didn't given the current gas crisis. (I'm Canadian so we're not as affected, as least where I am, but still).