24 - Risks
~*Selmak*~
I am too old for this, Jacob grumbles as he chops wood.
You are only sixty-eight. Saroosh could chop wood at 168.
I blended at sixty. She blended at thirty-two and came from a more advanced society.
At least we finally have an axe.
Yes. No more breaking off branches with my hands. He tosses a log of wood in the fire. What shall we have for dinner? Deer sirloin or deer ribeye?
Isn't that basically the same thing?
No.
Select what you want.
My dear Jacob heads to the river. He pulls a box out of the water.
Not fresh anymore, he thinks as he opens the box. There is very little inside. Most of the deer is drying out to make jerky.
I'll make sure you don't get sick.
We are out of sirloin and ribeye. He selects a slab of meat. Round steak it is.
It's all from the same animal anyway.
He drops it the ground, and I wiggle in annoyance. He closes the box and pushes it back into the cold river. It's the best we can do to keep food fresh.
He washes the steak before heading back to the fire. Thankfully, we recently found an area with a salt mine. He puts the steak on a rock by the fire, then throws some salt on it.
Sam is suffering, and I'm cooking a damn steak.
We are surviving.
Jacob drinks some water, then prepares the tubers we found. He soon adds them to the cooking rock.
The tel'tac is near us, and thankfully, only the engines were hit. However, something on the planet is preventing us from sending out a message for help.
That same something is preventing our life signs from being scanned, Jacob thinks as he eats a berry.
I thought we were saving those for dessert.
I only ate one. He eats another one just to annoy me.
Save a few for me.
Nope, I'm going to eat all of them, he teases with a smirk.
Flip our steak.
He does.
Since we are eating the berries early, put some on the steak.
I don't want berries on my steak.
Then just add them to my half of the steak.
Jacob adds a few berries to half.
Thank you.
~*Jolinar*~
~Year 1, Month 3, Day 15~
"Martouf?" We worry, and Sam risks stroking his hair. He's just been to see Zar, and he is dazed.
Malek picks him up and carries him to the room. He gently puts him down as he kisses his temple. That brings out a brief smile.
"I love you." Martouf looks to Sam.
"I'm here." She takes his hand.
"Rosha?"
I feel that hurts her a bit, though she tries to hide it from me.
It's alright, I assure. You are not her. She would not appreciate this mistake either, but please forgive him. He clearly doesn't know what he's saying.
"He's not quite with us," Malek assures softly.
Sam rubs over me. Lantash is getting his memories back. I should have expected this.
I press against her hand, enjoying her affection.
"Rosha…" Martouf looks to us. "She made me. I'm sorry."
"She?" Sam asks.
He does not mean you, I assure, picking up on her fears.
"The new warden. I had to be with her."
"It's alright," she assures, sad that he blames himself.
He becomes quiet, and we get started on dinner.
"He's asleep," Amb says after a few minutes, speaking softly.
I look over, then approach as the dry food soaks. When I sit near to him, he pulls me closer. I lean against him, and I feel his fingers gently rub my hand. The tender touch feels good, and I smile as he kisses the back of my head.
"I love you," he whispers.
"I love you." I retreat to give Sam control.
~+~+~.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Martouf says as he wakes up.
"About what?" Sam approaches because Malek is the one dealing with our soup.
"Netu."
I cringe, then take control.
"Jolinar."
"I was ashamed," I admit.
"You slept with another man."
I wince, glancing to Malek. He is surprised, but says nothing.
"I'm sorry," Martouf says as he glances over. "I thought he was in the calming room." He frowns. "That might have been a dream."
"It's alright."
He sighs under his breath, but I still hear it.
"Share what you want to say."
"You should have told me," he replies quietly.
"I had to gain his trust to escape prison."
Martouf closes his eyes.
"I'm sorry."
He sits up, looking into my eyes. "You didn't trust me to understand? After we were married for-"
"No." I take his hand. "I knew you would forgive us. Rosha knew. We both knew." I kiss his hand.
"Then why didn't you tell me?"
"Because we couldn't forgive ourselves."
"Oh, love." He pulls me closer, hugging me. "It hurt, but it hurt more that you didn't tell us. I didn't know what to think. I was angry at you, at Rosha, then angry at myself for being angry. You should have told us."
"I was ashamed."
"No more secrets."
"That was the only one."
He kisses me softly. "Lantash and I forgive you, but not for that. There is nothing to forgive there, and I will not taint the situation, your suffering, by saying otherwise."
I smile. I know it is not so simple, but it is what he told himself to handle this.
"We forgive and understand why you never told us, and we are sorry that we invaded your privacy by learning the truth."
"Oh." I brush his hair back with a sad smile. "It's alright. It was a rescue mission, and my secret is certainly worth the lives of Selmak and Samantha's father."
He nods slightly, then… "Did I call Samantha 'Rosha?'"
"Yes."
"I'm sorry."
Sam is given control. "It's alright."
"No, it's not. You are not her. She is not you. It's an insult to both of you."
"Martouf, you were out of it, and she was your wife for almost a hundred years."
He frowns, then sighs.
"You miss her."
"Yes."
Sam lies by him as Malek approaches.
Martouf hugs her, and when she responds in kind, he kisses her softly, moving over her.
"Are you sure?" Sam asks.
"Are you willing?"
"Yes."
He kisses her hard, grabbing her wrists with one hand. He uses the other to touch her. I make her body respond quickly.
He's going to be rougher than usual, I think.
I picked up on that. She arches her hips as his hand is replaced, and she is soon grunting loudly.
Martouf feels good. Too good. Should I be enjoying this? He is clearly hurting. His hands grip tighter, sending more shivers through her skin. It's intense bliss, and we soon feel him shuddering.
Sam catches her breath.
Martouf looks into her eyes, then reaches to finish her. He kisses as he touches her.
Sam reaches over Lantash, squeezing as she shudders. Martouf relaxes after.
"Martouf?" Sam worries when she sees him tearing up. "I thought you wanted…"
"I don't regret being with you." He takes her hand. "I'm just still hurting."
Malek hugs him.
Martouf kisses him. "Did you want angry sex too?"
"That's a bit rougher than what I am in the mood for," Malek replies with a chuckle.
Martouf gives Malek a soft kiss. "Gentle sex?"
Malik smiles. "Maybe later. Besides, our meal is ready."
~Year 1, Month 4, Day 2~
I am somehow both surprised and not surprised when I walk in on Pete having sex. It certainly explains why he goes missing for hours at a time.
He glances over, looking guilty, but keeps going.
The woman is a slave, belonging to someone else. I wonder if she could get into trouble for this.
"You didn't make any promises, did you?" I ask.
"No." Pete sounds angry.
I walk away, feeling Sam's discomfort. Not jealous, exactly, but wishing he had said something.
I know. It's ridiculous. I left him. I have been having sex with four other men. I should not be surprised.
Feelings are not rational, but this might be a good thing. He's still jealous of them. Still, we need to warn him.
We wait until he is out, then gesture to talk to him alone. He does not look pleased.
"Pete," I say.
He says nothing.
"The woman you are with is a slave."
He frowns. "Technically, so am I."
"I mean…are you sure she wasn't ordered to be with you?"
"I'm not a rapist." He defends before sighing. "Her master doesn't know about us."
"Then…you can get into trouble if you are caught. Even killed."
He frowns. "I don't think she would endanger me."
"She's new enough that she might not know, and…as sick as this sounds, being with her is considered theft."
His face scrunches.
I give Sam control.
"Look, I'm not going to tell you not to be with her. It was… I was surprised," she admits, "but you have seemed happier lately. I'm guessing she is the reason?"
"Yes."
"I'm happy for you," she says honestly.
"Thank you."
"Remember, you are under our protection, but not if you are caught. Be careful."
"I would…be sold?"
"I don't know. You are more likely to be killed."
He nods slightly. "I'll take that risk."
After, I find Malek in the calming room.
"How is Amb?"
"Angry. Exhausted. Nightmares make him fear sleep. I can't control them like I once could."
"No?" I approach.
"I get pulled in, thinking it's real." Malek shakes his head.
I run my fingers through his hair, holding him close as I gently kiss his temple. I feel his arms wrap around me.
"I'm losing him."
"Make him sleep."
"I told you the problem."
"Stay awake while he sleeps. I will stay by your side, and I will softly talk to you. This will help keep you on track."
"I hadn't considered that." He smiles a bit. "I'm a fool."
"No, you are exhausted. I can see it in your eyes."
He nods. "Right now… He is…a little too angry. I need to be here for a little while longer."
"Do you want me to stay?"
"No." He gives a slight smile, "I appreciate your visit, but I want to be alone for the moment."
"Find me when you are ready." I kiss him softly.
He returns the kiss.
~+~+~.
Pete is in the room when I arrive, but he quickly leaves.
"Jolinar," Lantash greets immediately, grinning widely. "I have a new memory of us."
That makes Sam smile, or it would if she were the one in control.
"We were dancing, and you had flowers in your hair." Lantash kisses us, touching over me. It makes us shiver. "I missed you." He whispers. "I fell in love with Samantha…as much as I ever loved you and Rosha."
I smile.
"Then Amb." He smiles.
What about Malek? Sam wonders.
He was married to Malek centuries ago. I guarantee you, he never stopped loving him.
"No one could replace you. I missed you. I miss Rosha."
"I miss her too…and Faron, though I barely remember him…but in spite of our…rough start…"
Rough start? Sam thinks.
To put it…mildly. "Samantha has been very patient with me."
Lantash kisses us again, then smiles as he looks past us. The presence of a symbiote tells me that Malek is returning.
"Pete has gone on a walk," Lantash informs.
Amb is the one in control, and he nods. "Malek has insisted that I sleep. He is going to stay…stay awake and…um…" He begins to mumble.
Lantash takes his hands and guides him in. He kisses him softly as Amb lays down in rags, and his hand reaches under Amb's prison gown, clearly stroking him.
"This will relax you."
Amb smiles a bit. Though exhausted, he's clearly enjoying the attention.
My loves. They are amazing to watch, and I truly love Amb and Malek as much as I love Martouf and Lantash.
You are usually telling me to join them at this point, Sam thinks.
Sometimes, it's fun to just watch.
Amb moans softly, and Lantash immediately kisses him, then uses more than his hand. Amb touches his hair.
After Amb is "relaxed," I cover him with a larger rag that acts like a blanket.
"Thank you." He smiles slightly as he snuggles into the blanket.
I rub over Malek and kiss Amb. He reaches his hand out to me, but seems to fall asleep before he gets there. I hear Lantash chuckle in amusement.
~+~+~.
I stay by them for hours, softly talking to Malek, touching the back of his neck. He responds from time to time, so I know he is awake.
He could walk around, couldn't he? Sam asks. While Amb sleeps.
Yes, but Amb needs this physically too.
Sam takes part in this, giving me a break. Martouf and Lantash do the same.
Time is hard to judge, but Pete returns at some point. He sleeps for a while, then leaves again.
Lantash looks to the doorway. "He's been gone a lot lately."
"He's sleeping with one of the slaves," Sam answers.
"I'm not paying for him to have sex."
"It gets him out of your hair."
Lantash frowned, then chuckled.
~*Pete*~
~Year 1, Month 3, Day 22~
I rub the back of my new… I'm not sure what she is, but I take delight in watching her body as she moves over me.
"Touch me."
I do so as I kiss her. "You are the best, Khelsea," I murmur.
"So are you." She giggles.
I moan as I shudder.
Khelsea kisses me, but stops as her master approaches. She quickly moves off me, only to be struck.
"Did I give you permission to spread for another man."
"No." Her voice is timid.
"Go to the room," he orders.
"Bye Pete," she says softly, scurrying off before I have time to respond.
Her master approaches me, and I must admit, he scares me. He's large, muscular, and covered in scars.
"I am under Lantash's protection," I remind nervously. Khelsea and I were hidden, so he could probably get away with whatever he wanted.
"No free samples. Pay for what you have taken."
"How much food do you-"
"Food?" He laughs. "I have more than enough." He grabs my arm.
My heart stills, and I brace to defend myself, but he yanks me away instead. He's strong. His grip hurts, and he's moving so fast that I can barely keep up with him. Acid fills my chest. Where is he taking me?
I'm surprised when I see Lantash.
"Your slave has stolen from me! I expect to be compensated."
"What did he steal?"
"He has been fucking one of my slaves."
"I apologize."
"He got to fuck, so I get to as well."
I feel sick.
"I'm sure there is another-"
"Even you are not above prison rules, Lantash. Your slave stole from me. I get to decide how I am to be compensated."
"Is he serious?" I ask.
Lantash says nothing.
"You can't be serious," I say to the man. My heart pounds. Sweat pours off of me.
"Compensation can also be discussed," Lantash finally says. "We can guard you as you bathe. Give supplies. Help-"
"I only want his obedience."
Lantash looks to me.
"Please," I beg.
"Did he abuse her?" He asked as he looks back to the master.
"No."
"Then I expect the same for him."
"What?" The word escapes in a quiet whisper.
Lantash walks away.
"How many times did you enjoy her?" Khelsea's master asks.
"Only a few times," I lie, knowing he wouldn't believe it happened only once.
~+~+~.
I wince as I enter our room. Lantash and Amb are having fucking sex.
"You sold my body, then had sex?"
"Make dinner," he orders as he keeps going.
I grumble as I go to the food. My body aches, and this will keep my mind occupied. Hopefully. At least whoever cooks gets to decide on what we eat.
They shudder after a few minutes, then relax.
"You were warned not to get caught," Lantash scolds. "And you were with her while Martouf was above." He lifts his chin slightly. "So, it's acceptable for you to have sex while we're being raped, but it's wrong when we do the same?"
"You might have considered that I would not appreciate-"
"I think you are forgetting who is in charge here."
I feel a chill move through me.
Lantash sighs. "You know that I did not want to offer your body, but by the rules of this prison, you did steal from him."
"Khelsea is a person, not a thing." I look to the doorway as Sam enters the room.
"I heard," she says with sympathy.
That's embarrassing.
"How many more…um, payments do you have to make?" Amb asks.
"Three." I cross my arms.
Sam frowns. "Lantash, is there anything we can do?"
"Fearing us is probably the only reason that Pete wasn't outright killed. To be honest, he's getting off easy."
She nods.
~+~+~.
I wince as Khelsea approaches me the next day. I go to her quickly, horrified.
"He beat the shit out of you."
She nods in tears. "Pete." Her voice squeaks. "I'm scared."
"I… Is there anything I can do?" I brush her hair back. "Take a beating for you? Something? I've been beaten before. I can-"
"No." Tears fall as she smiles. "I don't want you to hurt for me. I… I didn't know you would be punished. I swear. I thought I was only risking myself."
"I knew, and I don't regret… At least not for me, but…" I take her hand gently. "I'm sorry."
She flinches.
"What's wrong?"
"Pete… Have you seen any of the games?"
Those. A fairly new development in this prison…to pass the time.
"Masters making their slaves fight?" I shake my head. "No. It's cruel."
"I'm in a fight tomorrow."
"Since when?" Then I feel foolish. "Because you were caught."
She nods. "Pete, I'm scared. I don't know how to fight."
"I'll teach you some basic moves."
She smiles nervously.
~+~+~.
I go to the fight. Khelsea stands there terrified, completely naked, holding a small knife.
"She doesn't even get clothes?" I ask.
"What is the fun in that?"
"Khelsea!"
She walks over, giving a slight smile.
"I'll be rooting for you."
She gives a nod as tears fall.
"I didn't know if you wanted me to watch or not."
"I…I am glad there is someone here to cheer for me. Everyone else is cheering for Mangle."
"That's a name?"
"It is now." Her eyes widen in fear. "She's ruthless, Pete. I heard that she gets creative while making her kills."
"Khelsea, get back here!" Her master orders.
Khelsea gives me a quick kiss before rushing over. "Yes, master!"
I hear cheering, and another woman steps into the area. Tall and muscular, she's at least twice Khelsea's size. Fuck. She's taller than me, and I'm six feet.
Khelsea's eyes widen. She squeals in fear, then she tries to run. She is grabbed and thrown back in. I try to reach her, but I'm grabbed.
"No messing with the fight!"
Khelsea faces Mangle, but she doesn't stand a chance. She is toyed with, like a cat with their prey. Her cheek is cut. Than her leg. Than a breast.
This goes on, cut by cut as the crowd cheers. I turn away, unable to watch anymore.
After several minutes, I hear laughter, and I look to see Khelsea on the ground. Mangle is dancing over her. She raises the knife and stabs.
"Khelsea!"
Mangle hits dirt, then licks Khelsea's face. "Not yet, little one." She jumps up and beckons for more cheering.
Khelsea, having lost her knife, uses the distraction and tries to tackle Mangle. She is kicked in the face for it.
Fuck, I hate that bitch. How can she enjoy being so cruel?
Mangle continues to mock her, including at one point, dragging Khelsea around as people throw dirt. Khelsea coughs and chokes as she is hit in the face. Mangle finally moves over her, and slices open Khelsea's belly. I turn away as Mangle reaches into the wound. The crowd howls and cheers as Khelsea screams.
It finally stops, and I am released. I run to Khelsea. She's dead. Her intestines are pulled out.
Mangle's name is chanted and cheered. She lifts her arms in victory.
"Get out of here," someone orders. "Another fight is starting."
I grab Khelsea's body and walk away with her. I expect to be stopped, but no one says anything.
~+~+~.
Sam approaches me as I put oil on Khelsea.
"The fights?" She asks.
I tense. How would she know that?
"I'm sorry."
Screws four men, but my girl just happens to die after she finds out. I set Khelsea's body on fire, then step back.
"That's a waste of food," someone says.
"Quiet," Sam orders before stepping closer.
"I want to be alone right now."
"I don't think that's safe at the moment. I found you because I got a complaint about you at the fights."
"A complaint?" I look to her.
"Trying to stop the fight?"
I look to Khelsea.
"Pete… You can't interfere-"
"So I do nothing? Be as lazy as your fucking boyfriends?"
"That 'laziness' is why you are safe, why you are getting enough food, why-"
I glare.
"Pete…" She bows her head, and her eyes glow.
"I don't want to talk to you," I say as I look away.
"You can't disrupt basic prison rules. Those are the very rules that are keeping you safe. If you refuse… If you break such a rule again, we can't protect you."
I look to her with disbelief.
"Go to the room."
I feel heat in my skin as my heart pounds, as I clench my teeth. I look to Khelsea, knowing that I have to obey. That's part of prison rules. I clench my teeth before walking away.
~*Jolinar*~
Please, don't be stupid and just listen, I quietly beg, and I'm relieved when he walks away.
And just in time, Sam thinks as Khelsea's master approaches.
"I have already disciplined him," I say before he has time to speak.
"You are too soft with him." He smiles. "I can discipline him if you'd like." He reaches up under his prison gown, not caring that it exposes him.
"No."
"Too bad. When is my next payment?"
"Tomorrow."
Sam cringes.
He wants him now. At least this gives Pete a little time to mourn.
"Very well." He looks over us as he strokes himself.
"Walk away or you won't have anything to enjoy your payment." I step closer to make it clear that I don't fear him.
Fear flashes in his eyes before his expression hardens. He leaves. Angry. Lustful. I pity his slaves tonight.
I wait until he's gone before heading to the room, but-
"Jolinar." Lantash approaches.
"What's wrong?"
"The warden has arrived. Malek is with her."
"She took Malek?"
"No. Zar is collecting all three of us. I was ordered to find you."
"Oh, that's…"
"New, and that's always a bad thing."
For non-American readers Peter at six feet makes him about 1.83 m.
Out of curiosity, I looked up the other main characters, basing their heights on their actors.
Amb - Same as Pete
Sam - 5'9" or 1.75 m
Martouf - 5'10" or 1.78 m
Jacob - Same as Pete and Amb