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'El?'

Her voice at the other end of the phone was so small, so unlike the Olivia he knew that he bolted upright in bed. If she had been panicked, he wouldn't have been so concerned, but he knew it could only take something really bad for her to sound so vulnerable. He'd never heard her sound so lost, not even when her mother had died.

'Liv, what's happened? You ok?'

Elliot climbed out of bed, throwing on some pants and slipping out the bedroom door so as not to wake Kathy.

'Can you come to the ER?' Olivia asked, her voice shaking.

Elliot stopped in his tracks.

The ER? Was she ok? Was she hurt?

'Are you ok?'

'El, please,' she begged, and when he heard her finally dissolve into tears, he knew there would be a time for questions later.

Right now, she needed him, and he'd be damned if he was going to deny her that.

'Ok, sit tight. I'm leaving now; I'll be twenty minutes tops, okay?' he promised, already grabbing his car keys and locking the front door behind him.

He looked back at his phone and saw the call had already disconnected.

Olivia Benson was not one to beg, and she certainly wasn't one to cry, so he knew that whatever had happened was bad. Having known her for as many years as he had though, he also had a sneaking suspicion that it wasn't herself she was crying for. She was far too tough on herself and would never cry for her own pain.

No. Something had to have happened to someone else, someone she cared about. He tried to pretend that it didn't bother him that she had someone besides him she cared about so deeply. He knew that was wrong, and so completely the opposite of her selflessness. Olivia needed someone, and he was going to be there for her regardless.

…

It couldn't have been more than five minutes since the nurses had come rushing over to her outside the ER, hopelessly clutching Alex in her arms. She barely remembered them gently but firmly prying her fingers away from the blonde's arms and lifting her onto a gurney, wheeling her away and out of Olivia's sight. One nurse had stayed behind, presumably to ask Olivia questions, but she had very little information to share.

'She's Alex, Alexandra Cabot. I don't know what happened… she was just hurt and I brought her here.'

She tried to follow after Alex, but the nurse blocked her.

'What's your name, lovely?' she'd asked.

'Olivia. That's not important though. You need to help Alex.'

Why couldn't the nurse understand? Alex was who was important, not her.

'Ok, Olivia, can you tell me if Alex is on any medications? Does she have any medical conditions we should know about?'

She wracked her brain, grateful for the minute's distraction. This was something she could do, something she had to do, to help Alex.

'Um, something for low blood pressure. Runs in the family, I think. Can you go make sure she's ok now?' she asked again.

The nurse smiled sympathetically, taking in her anxious state. 'Are you ok, Olivia? Can I call anyone for you?'

Olivia had shaken her head, finally the nurse had gone, and she was left alone. She'd found her way to a chair near the entrance to the ER, making sure that nurse had seen her so she'd know where to find her when Alex was out of surgery.

If she made it out.

No, when, she corrected herself.

It doesn't do to catastrophize, Alex would tell her.

Alex was always telling her things like that, sounding much like a British grandmother that Olivia had seen on TV when she was growing up. She had mentioned once that she'd lived with her British aunt once, when she was much younger, and Liv wondered if that was where she got it from.

She smiled.

It would be fine. It was Alexandra Cabot, for goodness' sake. The rising star of the DA's office who had a real chance of a highly successful political career later in life, if she so chose to pursue it. Something as trivial as this wasn't going to stand in her way. Alex was the strongest person she knew; she'd be okay.

Just as Olivia had convinced herself of that fact, she'd seen a group of nurses and surgeons rushing towards the elevator.

'What is it, does anyone know?'

'Woman, attacked they reckon. Girlfriend brought her in. Collapsed outside, I heard.'

They didn't see her, couldn't possibly have known that she was sitting just ten feet away from them. But she heard them, and suddenly her heart dropped and tears filled her eyes.

Alex wasn't just going to be fine. She might, in fact, be very not fine. And for the first time that evening, Olivia had to face that possibility.

She felt her chest constrict and each breath became harder to take, until she knew she couldn't do this on her own. She needed somebody, but the somebody she wanted was currently lying in an OR, dying for all she knew. A feeling of loneliness that she had never felt before threatened to overwhelm her. It wasn't that she couldn't be on her own, she could. In fact, she'd spent most of her childhood and early twenties before she'd joined SVU surviving by alone, depending only on herself. It was just that, in all the years since she'd known Alexandra Cabot, Olivia had never felt alone. And now, faced with the prospect of going back to late nights in bars and takeaways for one, it seemed a distinctly less attractive lifestyle.

Alex made her happy. Her companionship, the way she looked after her even when she didn't think she needed it.

Especially when she didn't think she needed it.

Without realising it, Alex had become the centre of Olivia's universe, the whole world around which she orbited, willingly, happily, thankfully.

And now she was hurtling through space, tied to nothing. She was nothing without Alex.

She needed to pull herself together. If she wasn't able to stop herself from spiralling, there was only one other person she depended on enough to call. So, she'd found herself dialling the number she'd learned by heart and sighing with relief when he'd picked up after the third ring.

'El?'

…

True to his word, Elliot arrived at the ER within twenty minutes. He typed a quick text to his wife as he walked into the building, recoiling slightly as the smell hit him. He'd always hated the chemical smell of hospitals, the stench of disinfectant that got stuck up his nose. This wasn't about him, though, he reminded himself as he scanned the crowd for Olivia.

It didn't take him long to find her. It never did. She had a way of standing out in a crowd; it was just her presence, he'd always thought. Olivia had a way of walking into any room, and filling it, so that you would have to look up as she entered. She captivated his attention and had more control over him than he'd care to admit.

'Liv, what's happened?' he asked, striding over to where she sat, curled up in a chair and biting her nails absentmindedly.

He was taken aback by how, well, childlike she looked. Just by looking at her eyes, he could tell she was a million miles away, consumed by her own thoughts.

Elliot knelt down in front of her. 'Hey, Liv, sweetheart. Are you ok?'

Her eyes finally locked onto his as she snapped back into reality.

'It's Alex,' she whispered.

She cleared her throat.

'I was working late and she just turned up. Someone beat the crap out of her, a few guys, I think, from what she said. I practically dragged her here, but she passed out as I got her out the car and… oh god. It's not good, El.'

A single tear rolled down her cheek and she tried to brush it away before he saw, but she never was very good at hiding her feelings from her partner. He pulled a chair over to sit next to her and placed a hand on her back, rubbing circles in an effort to reassure her.

'You did everything you could, Liv. Do you know who did this?'

He watched her take a deep breath. 'She said they were after the Peterson file. It must've been the Mafia. They dragged her into an alley right outside her building. She was almost home, almost safe.'

She drew circles on her jean-clad thighs with her finger, round and round, to distract herself, Elliot presumed. She never had been very good at confronting her feelings.

'We'll get them, Liv. I promise. I'm going to call Cragen, ok? They need to know what happened.'

He waited until she nodded before pulling out his phone again to call his boss, quickly filling him in on what had happened. A sound behind him made him turn back around, hanging the phone up when he heard the nurse address Olivia.

'Are you here for Alexandra Cabot?'