Disclaimer: Zootopia and all Canon characters are owned by Disney. All other characters, product names, trademarks, and copyrights belong to their respective owners.
…..
"Seriously?" said Nick, pointing to the fleeing car that had just turned down a side street. "'You're a girl, and you need more stuff.' That's what you're going with?
"Turn in that alley, and you can cut him off two blocks up."
Judy pulled up on the emergency brake at the same time she turned the steering wheel hard, then released the brake after the car slid sideways, ending up facing the alley entrance into which Judy accelerated like a bat out of hell.
"If I remember my plotting map correctly, and I always do, there's a mall within a 9.6-minute fast walk of your apartment. Four if we call a Zuber."
"Thirty seconds if we order stuff online," offered Nick, spying their quarry right where he said they'd be.
"Don't you want to help me try on a bunch of outfits? All my sisters say they have the best time clothes shopping with their boyfriends."
*zzzzZZzzzz*
"Nick?!" yelled Judy, coming up beside her target and forcing them to pull over.
"What?! I'm awake! Were you saying something about clothes shopping?"
"Aaargh, males!"
-/-/-
Nick pulled open a large glass door and, waving Judy through, said, "Are you sure we have time to do this? We're on the clock, and at any second, my mom could call, and we'll have to dash home."
Judy softly patted Nick's cheek as she walked by, "You and shopping. We'll be fine. I've got a Zuber call all primed and ready."
Nick stopped in front of the mall map and tapped his chin, "Let's see, the food court is over there, and the electronics store is way over here, but there's a store that lets you demo video games here, and a Pokémon store a few stores away next to a kitchen gadget place. So, what do you think, Carrots? Should we start with food or video games?"
"Christmas decorations," replied Judy, pulling Nick away from the mall directory.
"But…"
"No buts. You need a tree, lights, ornaments, and a couple of stockings we can hang by the fireplace with care."
"I don't have a fireplace, and if anyone magically creates one and comes out of it, I'll shoot them."
Judy stopped, "You'd shoot Santa Claws?"
"In the leg, yes."
"Oh, okay. How about we hang our stockings above the stove, then?"
"No, we'll just turn the TV to the fireplace channel and hang them above that."
"There's a fireplace channel?"
"Yup, burning wood in 4K UHD and flames crackling in full surround sound."
"With hot canid-safe chocolate?
"Yup, and Green tea with a hint of strawberry for the bunny in the fox house."
Now holding Nick's paw, Judy guided him into a department store that had set aside their entire third floor for Christmas. Judy browsed the Howlmark ornaments and picked out an 'Our First House' one along with this year's next in the series Star Wars ornament.
"Thanks," said Nick as his eyes lit up at the sound effects that went off when he pressed a button on top of the Imperial Tie-fighter.
"Their aim is as terrible while flying these as it is with their pawheld blasters," said Nick.
Judy rolled her eyes, 'Nick was so cute about certain things.'
"How about we roll your ears into side buns, and you can cosplay Princess Leia for Christmas?"
'And other times, a total dork!'
Finally grabbing a cart, the couple picked out a small tree, added the ornaments they'd found, picked up some tinsel, a string of lights, and finally, a festive tree skirt.
Well, almost finally, Nick dropped a small package of something green and red into the cart.
"Did you just put a sprig of mistletoe in our cart?" asked Judy.
"Maybe."
"You do remember that I'm your fake girlfriend, and we're in a fake relationship, right?"
Nick shrugged, "It's fake mistletoe, so we should be good."
"Fine, but it goes over the laundry machines because that's the one place in your apartment I'm very sure you avoid like the plague."
Paying for everything, Nick and Judy had their decorations stored behind the counter until they were ready to leave, or rush out if Vivian's call came, and headed towards Nick's game store. That wasn't the name of the store, it was what Judy grew to think of it after so many times Nick asked if they were done Christmas shopping yet.
She was also able to forestall the video game quest long enough to convince Nick to split an orange drink and a gooey cinnamon roll.
Outside a store with more blinking lights, screens, gaming consoles, custom controllers, and chairs that claimed you could sit in them for hours without cramping up, Judy pointed across the walkway to a small mammal specialty clothing store, told Nick she'd be in there trying on dresses, and then released him into his feral gaming habitat.
Free at last.
Nick bounced around the store and tried out a few new items he'd been thinking about. The new gaming chairs were good, but his old one was still good enough in comparison. A new controller would be nice, his old one was pretty beat, and then thinking about it, two would be nice since Judy had had hers since before she went to college. Picking out a camouflage one for him and a pink flowered one for Judy, he… put the pink flowered one back and grabbed a Bloody Zombie themed controller instead.
Nothing says my partner like a zombie apocalypse with brains as the main course.
Grabbing a game he'd heard good things about, Nick strolled up to the checkout counter, where he handed the clerk his purchases and his credit card and… looked across the way to the dress store and caught sight of a grey-furred bunny doe wearing a spectacular form-fitting black cocktail dress turning around in front of a full-length mirror.
"Whoa," whispered Nick to himself.
"Sorry," said the clerk, "do you not want this stuff."
Nick continued to stare.
"Sir?"
Nick's head jerked toward the clerk, "What?"
"Do you still want the controllers and the game?"
"Yes, sorry, yes. Charge it to my card and hold onto the bag, I'll be back in a few to pick it up."
Rushing over to the clothing store, not something he ever imagined he'd be doing, Nick pushed open the door and—
Did a doubletake. The store had a distinctly flowery, female smell to it.
"May I help you?" said a busty, mottled brown and black rabbit doe behind the counter.
"Sorry," said Nick, not seeing Judy anywhere, "I'm looking for my friend. She was just trying on a dress."
The doe chuckled, "We haven't had a vixen in here all day. Are you sure this is the store your friend's at?"
"Yeah," said Nick, sliding up to the counter while keeping his eyes on the dressing room doors, "She's not a vixen."
"Oh," said the doe, perking up a bit. "What kind of girl interests a good-looking guy like you."
Nick saw one of the doors crack open, and a grey paw push it open the rest of the way. He smiled at seeing Judy step out in a long backless red dress with a slit on the left side that went all the way up to her thigh.
And how the dress showed off her tail. "Wow," whispered Nick.
"Is that your friend?"
"Uh-huh."
The clerk looked over at a bunny giving her fox friend a shy wave, then looked back at the fox with his muzzle hanging open, and took a stealthy sniff.
Smiling now, the clerk took advantage of the fox being distracted to adjust her overflowing top, brush back her ears, and wait for Judy's slow turn to have her facing away from the fox.
Putting her paw on Nick's shoulder just at the right time, the clerk rubbed it until Nick noticed enough to turn his head and say, "Huh?"
Putting her card in Nick's shirt pocket with her other paw, the doe whispered, "Well, I'm looking for a friend, too. A new special friend and I get off work in twenty minutes. So why don't you ditch whoever that scrawny loser is in the bargain section and call me so we can have a little fun."
The light dimmed. Storm clouds would have moved in if they could have.
"Ow, ow, ow, ow!" cried the pawsy doe, her shameless paw removed from her target and now being held in a subduing grip by a doe that looked fully capable of twisting said paw off its owner's wrist.
"He's not interested. He's mine. Leave him alone." And pulling the demon doe's evil trailing out of her fox's shirt pocket, Judy slammed it down on the counter and said, "And you can keep this. If you ever touch my boyfriend again, I will hurt you. Understand?"
The doe nodded, "Yes, ma'am. Sorry, just being a bunny."
"Ow!"
"My fox, no touching."
The clerk nodded and gasped in relief as Judy let go of her paw. Then threw her arms up as she was suddenly hit with a red dress.
"Come with me, now," said Judy, waving for Nick to follow her to the changing room.
Nick was frozen with confusion at what just happened. He was also frozen in place due to Judy only wearing her bra and panties while stomping her way to the dressing room to get her clothes.
"Nick."
"Yes, ma'am," said Nick, now moving with a purpose.
Tucked into the dressing room a few seconds behind Judy, Nick found her, head in paws, sitting on the bench.
"Are you okay?"
Judy nodded, sighed, shook her head, then said, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gone all medieval on that girl. I mean, I'm not really your girlfriend, and it probably doesn't matter who your grandma sees you with as long as you've got someone. Do you want me to go tell Miss grabby claws you'd…"
Judy took a breath, let it out, and, looking down at her feet now, said, "She's a lot better looking than I am, probably knows a lot more about… you know, than I ever will. Do you want me to go apologize and tell her you'd like to spend the night with her?"
"Carrots."
Judy shook her head, "She's totally hot."
Nick chuckled, then before Judy could do anything but 'eeep,' she was in his lap. "Judy Hopps, please don't talk down about yourself. You are an amazing, beautiful girl, way hotter than that top-heavy clerk, and you are, by far and away, the best fake girlfriend a guy could ever ask for."
Judy cracked a bit of a smile, "So you looked at her boobs?"
"Kind of hard not to, Carrots. But on the plus side, your tail is much hotter than hers."
Judy rolled her eyes, "You've always liked tails."
"Yup, a tail connoisseur if I do say so myself, and yours is definitely in the top twenty, no fifteen, I've—"
"Ow."
"Fifteen? You'd tell your fake girlfriend her tail doesn't even break the top ten. What kind of fake boyfriend are you? Call your mom, I'm going to need another pie for this."
Nick chuckled as he pulled his indignant fake girlfriend in for a hug, and after he felt Judy returning the hug, Nick said, "Top one or two, depending on the light."
"Better," said Judy into Nick's chest fur.
"Still want that second pie?"
"Yup."
Nick and Judy held each other for a few minutes until there was a knock on the door, and 'that hussy' of a doe said, "The mall's closing in fifteen minutes. And sorry about trying to pick up your boyfriend, he wasn't marked, so I assumed… sorry."
"Thanks," said Judy, "I'm sorry, too. I shouldn't have overreacted."
"It's okay. You're a lucky doe."
Once the clerk's footsteps had receded from the door, Nick asked, "She tried to pick me up because I wasn't marked?"
Sighing, Judy said, "Yeah, sorry about that. It's kind of a bunny doe thing."
Then Judy went silent as she picked at all the places the clerk had touched her fox to make sure that there were no foreign doe-hairs or lingering tufts of fur that needed to be burned in effigy or converted into a voodoo doll and poked with a pin.
Nick waited until Judy was satisfied that his shirt was hussy clean before clearing his throat and saying, "If I'm going to be in a fake relationship with a real bunny doe, maybe you should fill me in on what's going on so I don't accidentally walk into another triple-D sized meatgrinder.
"Ow."
"Double-D at best, and you're not supposed to notice that sort of thing when you're with someone else," huffed Judy.
"A very large double-D, and evidently, until I'm marked, this fox is fair game for any bunny doe that wants him."
Judy growled, "No!" Then relaxing, Judy calmly said, "Not exactly."
"The clerk's cup size or the marking?"
"Both," huffed Judy. "Look… let's just say for the sake of argument that maybe some of the reputation rabbits have for hopping around between partners is a smidge true."
Nick smiled.
Judy glared.
Nick stopped smiling.
Judy continued. "And with does usually being a little more mature and ready to commit to a guy than the guys are ready to commit to a doe, if a doe finds a guy she likes and another doe catches wind of it… hormones, a doe's biological clock, jealousy, certain wrestling moves, all the bad parts of the Rom-Coms we don't watch, it can all lead to some competition between does for a guy."
"Unless he's marked?" asked Nick.
Judy nodded.
Nick's muzzle scrunched up, "Foxes mark each other after they've been dating a while and decided to move toward becoming mates. I guess for foxes, it's a pre-engagement thing."
"For rabbits, we mark each when we're… you know, demonstrating our commitment to each other."
"Demonstrating? Like…"
"Yes, the demonstration usually results in a litter, so being marked is a pretty serious sign of commitment."
"Okay," said Nick, "so, I'm thinking it would take more than a third pie for you to be willing to mark your fake boyfriend."
Judy chuckled, "Yeah, besides the part where I rub the top of your head with my chin, marking someone sets off a lot of biology that's not real easy, or comfortable, to undo. So, you're just going to have to watch out for big-busted bunny does stalking you and avoid their wiles until after your grandmother signs off on your fake girlfriend."
"All without looking at said big busts?"
"Yup," replied Judy, smiling big.
Shaking his head, Nick lifted Judy off his lap while making sure to leer at her tail extra-long so her ears would pink up cutely. Judy, in turn, was able to exact an adequate amount of revenge on her fox by wiggling said tail enough while she dressed for Nick's resulting blush to show through his fur.
Tail-related teasing finished, bunny doe clothed, gaming gear retrieved, Nick and Judy backtracked through the mall to pick up the rest of their stuff and headed home.
And yes, Nick texted his mom that she owed Judy a second pie.