Astronomy

Frank Longbottom's pov:

I didn't see the truth until today. The truth about one of my friends, I've always been suspicious about.

My whole life I've been thought not to trust anyone blindly. To find out their secrets first in case they turn their back. I was positive about knowing every bigger secret of everyone except for one, and that was Remus.

I know a lot about him like what his parents are doing. (One ministry business in the field of magical creatures, the other has a Muggle job in London Eastbourne.)

Who he's been friends with. (In the first years nobody but Lilly while always being polite and at least somehow friends with everyone. Then slowly since third grade with the three roommates of his. Sirius, Peter and James.)

I could tell you a lot more about him like favorite to least favorite subject ( Herbology to Divination) but that didn't matter.

He was guarding an even bigger secret. All of the teachers seem to know what it was but still they kept silent not letting us hear a single vow.

From time to time it affected him, if what I am noticing is related to the secret. He keeps getting less or even up to non sleep some times what surprisingly doesn't affect his grades in any way.

He has been an A-student for a very long time and nothing seemed to be able to stop that. I tried several attempts to discover his secret. One of them was trying to get to know his friends better. Lily was the first I occupied myself with, another A-student, I think that's why they spend much time learning together but it might also be connected, because Lily had a secret as well.

A rather big one I suppose, she had an eating disorder. I found out when I questioned her not eating with the others. She was pretty good at hiding it but I am sure Remus found out the first year since he proved his loyalty and support.

He covered her with excuses in front of her friends and I am even positive she was able or comfortable eating with him.

Sirius was the second one I examined. He was other than obviously in love with Remus actually pretty good at hiding his problems. I was taking a while to see he was in fact suicidal, crazy to think he actually writes a book about it. Hard to believe Lupin hasn't figured yet.

I closed the book wich I obviously wasn't really reading ending my daydream about secrets. It was time we all got moving to the astronomy floor.

I was team light source so I moved together with Remus. He was talking to Lily right now and I overheard them talking in hushed voices.

"Everything ok with you Remus?" He shook his head slightly. That was the first time I saw him admitting something was not right. I believe she was the only one he admitted stuff like that. " You want to tell me?" She asked. "I would love to Lily, but it's complicated." He answered while we moved down the hall to the first stairs.

We had to wait a little till the stairs were in the right direction then we ran up. The conversation between Remus and Lily went unnoticed by the morst because the others were either already talking to someone else or too tired to bother anything.

I discreetly moved closer to the two, pretending to adjust his light source. "What about tomorrow? I have a lot time, we could go to Hogsmeat." He shook his head. "James is going to kill me and the others already planned a lot."

She sighed. "You are all just a bunch of trouble makers, seriously why are you friends with them?" I saw Remus shrugging from the corner of my eyes.

"Btw. are you in love with Sirius?" "What???" He answered a little too loud. "No! This whole situation has absolutely nothing to do with him. We are talking two different stories! And no! Why should I be? I am not gay!" The more he talked the quieter he got.

He was so absolutely lying about Sirius though I know there is another main secret. The two changed subject and talked about the things the others had planned during the weekend and that's when I returned to my original post.

We were very lucky the ghosts didn't show up but that didn't change the fact it was a long walk and we had to wait for the stairs. Once we reached our destination the two stopped talking.

Our task for this lesson was to study the moon and stars around it since it was the day after full moon. The telescopes were already placed and in groups of two we watched the stars in turns.

I chose the one next to Remus who worked together with Sirius. When my partner Alan took the telescope I had time to watch Remus closely. He made Sirius go first so he just leaned against the wall.

There was this glance again, this somehow primal look that made him look so unique and his eyes that reflected pain and hurt but now mostly loss of sleep. Alan knew me very good he wanted to switch but he saw me studying Remus so he kept going writing something in my note book as well. I was very thankful for that.

Sirius took his note book and wrote something so Remus had to look into the sky. I was about to turn my head away but then I saw his hand tremble a little on the lens. He pushed away from the telescope and clenched his fist.

I am pretty sure nobody other then me noticed because he gridded his teeth and forced himself back to look into the ski.

He altered the direction a little so he was not staring directly at the moon anymore. He relaxed a little so I occupied myself with Sirius a little. He watched Remus now with a lovely look.

Jup, he was definitely in love with Remus and not too little. But this little incident from Remus made me think. Then the realisation dawned so suddenly making me gasp.

It took a while for me to get it but I think I figured it out.

- His sudden leaving in Defence of the dark arts wich was 100% planned

- The worry in Black's look

- The bandages

- His silver knife he left on the table one day wich I brought back to him

- His monthly leaving

- The different behavior from the teachers

- The astronomy lessons after the full moon

- His loss of sleep

I finally realized he was a werewolf and the teachers knew. That's what he was hinting at with Lilly… They are blind, all four. How sad… And do they know he does self harm? Probably not.