Happy Holidays, and Merry Christmas to those who celebrate it.
Shen Jiu isn't having a Happy or Merry anything.
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Much like the series of beatings Luo Binghe witnessed, the next series of memories was a repetitive string of the teachings Shen Jiu was given under his new master.
The extermination of the Qiu family was far from the last time Shen Jiu killed. Luo Binghe watched him kill again and again under his master's orders, mostly to steal whatever valuables they had. He was also being taught 'cultivation techniques', but few were actually proper cultivation, surely damaging the man's ability to cultivate even further. No wonder the man was so prone to qi deviations if this was his foundation! It was a wonder he hadn't died as a teenager (much like it had been a wonder that Luo Binghe never died using the techniques in that incorrect cultivation manual Shen Qingqiu had given him).
The murdering continued until the day that Shen Jiu's new master died.
The blurry figure, 'Qi-ge' had miraculously returned, but not to save Shen Jiu from the Qiu's. Instead, he happened to come across Shen Jiu's latest kills while he still stood over them.
"Stay away!"
Shen Jiu set off an alert firework just before his master emerged from the trees.
And recognized 'Qi-ge' as Yue Qingyuan.
Suddenly, Luo Binghe was presented a theory as to why his face was kept blurry.
Yue Qingyuan and Shen Jiu's teacher fought, but ultimately, it was Shen Jiu who stabbed his master in the back, just one more kill in what had become a long list.
Shen Jiu begged Yue Qingyuan for answers and only received an apology.
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Shen Jiu, as Luo Binghe knew would happen eventually, joined Cang Qiong Mountain Sect on Qing Jing peak. The only one who liked him at all was the peak lord, who eventually chose him to be Head Disciple, much to his peers' displeasure.
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Shen Jiu refused to sleep with his peers, unable to rest while surrounded by men. Instead, he went to a nearby brothel and slept among the women.
Just slept.
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He and Liu Qingge fought over and over. And yet, Shen Qingqiu still saved him during a shared mission.
Liu Qingge thought Shen Qingqiu had tried to kill him.
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Liu Qingge fought him for going to the brothel and tainting their sect's image.
Yue Qingyuan, despite indulging him and keeping what happened secret, still scolded him, all without knowing why Shen Jiu came there in the first place.
All without knowing that Shen Jiu had something in common with the prostitutes he felt comfortable around.
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"Good talent doesn't guarantee success."
He watched the day he had been selected to join Qing Jing Peak, becoming sour at the realization that Shen Qingqiu had only chosen him as a disciple to mess with Liu Qingge (and to appease Ning Yingying), Yue Qingyuan allowing it like the enabler he was. Luo Binghe had always wondered why the man chose him despite apparently hating him from the moment he laid eyes on him. At first, he'd hoped that it was because his former teacher had seen his potential, and he was only being rough to make him stronger. Then, he thought that, maybe, Shen Qingqiu had changed his mind but couldn't easily dismiss him as a disciple.
No, it turned out to be jealousy. Simple as that.
"You had a mother?"
"Mother was the kindest person in all the world to me."
He had a mother. He was talented. He was at the proper age for cultivation. All of it together struck a match to light a fire of jealous hatred in Shen Qingqiu's heart, even though the object of his jealousy had only been a child at the time.
Luo Binghe watched bitterly as hot tea was poured over his head, his Shizun feeling satisfied at being able to wield enough power to harm others as he had been harmed.
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Luo Binghe watched as Shen Qingqiu entered the Ling Xi caves, watched as he tried to meditate and was eventually interrupted by someone making far too much noise for where they were. He went to find the source out of annoyance and found Liu Qingge having a qi deviation.
Shockingly, Shen Qingqiu begrudgingly tried to help, only to end up having a qi deviation himself. What followed was a confused series of images that told Luo Binghe that Shen Qingqiu himself didn't entirely remember the event. The two fought, and in the end, Shen Qingqiu was the one left standing.
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Luo Binghe had little interest in watching himself get abused, and he had already been present when it actually happened, so he forced the memories to move forward a little faster, stopping when Shen Qingqiu was trapped within the water prison (he especially avoided the memory of when he was thrown into the Endless Abyss, knowing that his rage would distract him). He had already been beaten up pretty well in this memory, and Yue Qingyuan was trying to heal the wounds as much as he could with his own qi. Luo Binghe remembered allowing Yue Qingyuan to visit him. After all, he was Shen Qingqiu's sect leader, and at the time, he didn't have enough sway to deny him access for just a moment.
He felt a little vindication when he heard Yue Qingyuan scold him for how he treated Luo Binghe as his disciple and also a little annoyed when Shen Qingqiu expressed zero remorse for doing so. He tried to justify it with him being a demon and what he had done after being thrown into the Endless Abyss, which Luo Binghe knew had never even crossed the man's mind until his nature as a demon had been discovered. His demonic heritage had never been the reason until then.
It was almost as annoying that the subject was dropped so quickly, and of all things, Yue Qingyuan asked if he had killed Liu Qingge. Shen Qingqiu didn't actually answer, and Luo Binghe would bet it was because he didn't even really know himself.
"What's happened has happened! I've already 'considered' it hundreds of thousands of times! There is no 'if', no 'in the beginning'- there was never any chance of redemption!"
He could see Yue Qingyuan's heart break, even if his face was too blurry to determine his expression.
"You should go. I'll tell you this: Even if all of this could be redone from the beginning, in the end, the conclusions would remain the same. My heart is full of malice, my insides hatred and resentment. Today, Luo Binghe wishes for me to die horribly, and I only have myself to blame."
Well, even if he wasn't sorry, it did mollify Luo Binghe a little to hear him acknowledge that his fate was his own fault.
"Do you still hold such hatred within yourself?"
Shen Qingqiu laughed, the sound bitter and caustic to the demon lord's ears.
"Only when I see other people unhappy can I be happy myself. What do you think?"
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Luo Binghe knew what came next- it would be his torture of Shen Qingqiu for all the wrongs he had committed against him.
Luo Binghe didn't find himself particularly eager to relive the entire process, knowing it would be dull the second time around, but he found himself pausing on the moment he presented Shen Qingqiu with the fragments of Xuan Su. At first, he didn't believe that Yue Qingyuan was dead, but then he started to laugh and smile as though it was some kind of joke.
"Shen Qingqiu, do you think that pretending to be insane will work on me?"
He thought that, perhaps, Shen Qingqiu didn't need to fake it anymore.
And maybe, he hadn't quite been faking it then, either.
"Luo Binghe… You're a bastard, you know that?"
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In the morning, Luo Binghe woke up gently but with a deep sense of discomfort. He had expected to find some new information, but he really hadn't expected so much of what he thought he knew to get upended by sifting through his Shizun's memories. He didn't expect to feel even a little bad for the man who had spent years abusing and mistreating him, but as he watched him go through so many of the same ordeals, as well as others unique to himself, Luo Binghe couldn't help it.
The things he had seen weren't an excuse, not a good enough justification for what had been done to him, but it certainly did explain a lot.
Honestly, would anyone in Shen Qingqiu's shoes have turned out to be some noble, kind-hearted cultivator? He doubted it (it even made him wonder whether that other world's Shizun had experienced the same life as this one).
And ironically, many of the crimes Shen Qingqiu had been imprisoned for had extenuating circumstances. The murder of the Qiu's was revenge for years of abuse, and he'd been qi deviating when Liu Qingge died and may not have even directly killed him- the man apparently wasn't even some brothel-hopping lecher who preyed on young girls. No, the funny thing was, the vast majority of his worst crimes- killing innocents just to steal from them- were hardly even brought up at his trial. What, had no one cared enough about that? It's not as though Luo Binghe had been the only one to bring grievances forward. So while Luo Binghe wasn't too interested in those crimes in particular, certainly someone would have missed at least a couple of people he killed. Perhaps no one had really known just how many lives were on his hands. They'd known he must have killed under Wu Yanzi, but had anyone ever actually been able to determine a total count?
But, all of this was quite a shock, and Luo Binghe thought he would need some time to process it.
And already, he surprised himself as he noticed that thinking about Shen Qingqiu didn't bring up nearly as much hatred as it did before.
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The next time Luo Binghe appeared, he seemed to be determined about something. Though, Shen Qingqiu didn't really have any idea what it was.
As usual, he set down a tray of food, but rather than immediately forcing him to eat, Luo Binghe instead moved to sit in front of him on the floor, much too close for Shen Qingqiu's liking.
"Shizun."
Shen Qingqiu looked at him suspiciously.
"Beast."
Luo Binghe's mouth twitched into a frown for a second before smoothing back out. The former peak lord stared back, wondering if Luo Binghe would say anything else or if he was just trying some new kind of intimidation tactic to get him to eat on his own. As if staring at him would work.
Instead, Luo Binghe did, in fact, speak:
"Why did you mistreat me when I was a disciple?"
Shen Qingqiu blinked at the unexpected question.
"You already know why," he answered with a grimace. "I believe we went over that shortly before you gouged one of my eyes out."
"I would like you to answer it again."
"Why?"
"Well, perhaps your answer will change when you're not in the state you were then."
Ha, as if his answer would be any different!
"Because you were a cocky little upstart who annoyed the shit out of me," Shen Qingqiu sneered. "See? Same answer as last time."
Luo Binghe laughed, but it was short and unamused. Somehow, it wasn't overly malicious, though.
"Do you have that response memorized? I do believe that you used just about those exact words."
"It's the truth."
"Is it…?"
"Obviously."
"Hm. I see…," Luo Binghe accepted the answer for the time-being. "Well, time for the next question, then: Do you remember killing Liu Qingge?"
This question also gave him pause, less because it caught him off-guard and more because of how it was phrased. Usually, people asked whether he did kill him, not if he remembered doing it. He supposed Luo Binghe just assumed he was guilty.
"What's it to you?" he hissed. "You didn't even know him, and I've already been convicted of his murder, haven't I? So what point is there in you asking me about it?"
Luo Binghe sighed.
"Alright, then, how about this one: What was the name of Qiu Haitang's brother?"
Unhappy at the reminder of that dead Young Master, Shen Qingqiu clenched his fists.
"Ask your damn wife."
Luo Binghe glanced away for just a second, playing as if he were considering it.
"Ah, but I'm sure she's already mentioned it to me at some point, and I have forgotten," he explained. "And besides, I don't want to upset her if I don't have to."
"So? What do you need that be- his name for, anyway?"
The demon lord refocused his eyes on him.
"Is it really so hard to just give me a name, Shizun?" Luo Binghe asked. "It's only a few syllables, isn't it?"
His palms started to hurt, but his nails were too short to break the skin. He really wished they could, though, as thinking about that man was enough to make him feel phantom hands grabbing at him.
"Qiu Jianluo," he spat, quickly brushing his hand across his arms as if that would dispel the ghosts reaching for him.
"Qiu Jianluo…," the demon lord hummed. "I see."
"Is there any actual point to this, or are you just trying to be annoying?"
Shen Qingqiu didn't know what the demon was up to. The questions were only connected by being his crimes. Did that mean that Luo Binghe was leading up to some kind of punishment? Was this finally the day that Luo Binghe began torturing him again? What was he going to do to him first?
He shuddered as a wave of anxiety fell over him, but he didn't let it show on his face. If the bastard was going to torture him again after all, then he was going to make sure to keep himself quiet this time. No screaming, not even when his limbs got torn off again.
Luo Binghe regarded him for a long time, his eyes looking for something, but Shen Qingqiu didn't know what. Maybe he was deciding which limb to rip off first.
"Does Qiu Haitang know what her brother did to you?"
It took a few seconds for the next question to register, but when it did, ice immediately filled his veins and he froze to the spot, even though Luo Binghe's blood parasites remained dormant within their host.
Does Qiu Haitang know what her brother did to you?
Suddenly, Shen Jiu felt dirty under the demon lord's gaze, old aches reigniting throughout his body.
What Qiu Jianluo did to him.
His breath caught in his throat. Why was Luo Binghe asking this?
"What do you mean 'what he did to me'?" he snarled.
"Shizun. Answer the question."
Shen Jiu stood up, backing away from the demon lord as the ghosts continued to run their hands down his back, down his arms, reaching lower with painful grasps.
"Shizun."
"What the fuck are you talking about?!" he hissed. "What the fuck are you saying?!"
His legs were trembling, and his tight fists shook even more. Luo Binghe shouldn't be asking that. He shouldn't be asking about what Qiu Haitang knew. He should be asking about what he'd done, whether Qiu Haitang saw it, why he did it, anything else- anything he'd already been asked. Luo Binghe didn't know that Qiu Jianluo did anything to him. His darling wife had given him the story, told everyone how well her brother treated him, how he was family who suddenly snapped and killed everyone because he was seduced by a criminal.
Luo Binghe shouldn't be asking him that.
The demon lord stood up as well.
"I've done some investigating," he explained, slowly approaching.
With each step Luo Binghe took toward him, Shen Jiu took one back.
"I didn't bother before. After all, I just wanted my own revenge. Honestly, I wasn't even all that interested in revenge for my wife. I just wanted to deal out my own."
He came closer.
"But, you know, people don't just kill off almost an entire family and most of their servants for no reason."
Shen Qingqiu's back hit the wall.
"Especially not when that family has treated them well."
He leaned over Shen Jiu, eyes staring into his, eyes that knew too much, eyes that could see how tainted he had become.
"So Shizun…," Luo Binghe spoke. "What did Qiu Jianluo do to deserve being murdered?"
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Okay, so, just for the record: My opinion on Shen Jiu is that he 100% deserved to be punished because he really did commit a lot of actual crimes, including child abuse. But, I don't condone torture, and there were reasons he turned out the way he did. So, I feel like he deserved punishment, but Luo Binghe went way too far with it. Not that this is exactly a unique opinion or anything- I'm just saying because some fics condemn/exonerate him more/less than others, so I'm just clarifying.
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