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Topic: Adam Smasher General Discussion Thread
In: Boards Corporations Arasaka
Darkwraith_Lance (Original Poster) (Verified Edgelord) (Community Helper)
Posted on October 15th, 2076:
This is the thread dedicated as a containment thread for everything related to the Arasaka employee Adam Smasher. The admin has rejected the request for more threads, but made some changes to let certain threads extend past their normal limit. The old thread is in the archive (link 5).
Remember, there are no rules about moderation. Enjoy your ban if you piss them off.
Having said that, The following links contain the archive of basically everything known about the man in question. Remember to check the archive before asking questions about available content. Original content takes about a day or so before being added to the archive, we have to first check with the lawyer if it's legal to have saved or not.
So no, no pirated content, you have to go somewhere else for that.
LINK 1, LINK 2, LINK 3, LINK 4, LINK 5, LINK 6
(Showing Page 132 of ???)
SmashmeDaddy (Shitposter)
Replied on December 21, 2076:
THE WOMB-SMASHER HAS BEEN UNLEASHED
I REPEAT : THE WOMB-SMASHER HAS BEEN UNLEASHED
[Image of Adam Smasher's Gemini, he is fully nude, and holding an antique machine gun, the overall image is tastefully presented and edited]
Finney_Findey
Replied on December 21, 2076:
[This post has been deleted]
[MOD : Nudity is fine, a vid of you masturbating to that nudity is not. Fucking femcels.]
A-A-Ron
Replied on December 21, 2076
@SmashmeDaddy
Image
Singular
Post a vid next time.
On happier news, we can now have accurate Smasher XBDs, so that's nice.
Now if only grandpapa Saburo would give us another official Smasher fight BD, please!
Heehoo_Peanut
Replied on December 21, 2076
SISTERS IT'S OVEEEEER! Smasher got smashed by a nazi larper, age of borg daddy has ended.
[Image of a wailing and crying monkey with a cybernetic jaw.]
SwordofSilence
Replied on December 21, 2076
Claim your waifu, I like the techie one on the right.
[Image of a promotional lineup of DangerGal Elites]
Californians_Aren't_Human_2
Replied on December 21, 2076
That Smasher guy, totally fuckin' overrated. Blackhand did everything he could do and better, didn't need any chrome neither.
Morechromemoreplates
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Californians_Aren't_Human_2
[This post has been deleted]
Knife's_Edge
Replied on December 21, 2076
Old Smasher would have wiped the floor with this poser.
Nu-Smasher is goyslop incarnate.
FUCKING CATS HAD TO RUIN IT BY BUTTING IN!
@Californians_Aren't_Human_2
Nice meat, retard.
How long does that last you?
Gonkfucker
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Knife's Edge
[Image of a smug looking woman with cat-ear mods]
Metal_Gear_Chungus
Replied on December 21, 2076
So, from what footage we do have… (Again, thank you @Mister5by5)
Was that lightningbot doing sieg-heils to throw lightning around? It's a bit too blurry to be sure.
Golden_Leg_Jimmy
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Metal_Gear_Chungus
I think those are Yoga Poses actually.
[Image comparing a blurry wide-shot of Panzer-Bot Aryas to a collection of Yoga Poses]
The number of arms makes it a bit unclear, but it looks like it matches up.
@Fashy_Groper
Based? Is that some new slang?
Look, I think you need to…
[Audio clip of Adam Smasher, his words cut and edited to make him say 'Take your fucking meds.']
Sacremento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076
So, looking at the gun that Smasher is holding in that roadway-stand, I think that's an MG-42, either an original or a replica.
I think it's a genuine, either that or a MG3.
Either way I think it's really fucking neat that he has an antique gun like that.
DoubleBluff_Bandit
Replied on December 21, 2076
Who the fuck throws lightning as a weapon? Lightning is a shitty weapon. Use a gun or something.
@Sacremento_King
Yeah, and the one that he's holding is really nice too.
Milkmancer
Replied on December 21, 2076
@DoubleBluff_Bandit
Tell that to the Butcher.
Adam Smasher more like Adam SMASHED!
Catwatch
Replied on December 21, 2076
All of DangerGal was there? Did anyone see Sierra-chan? I haven't seen her since she broke my legs, and I wanted to get her to sign my cast.
Sacramento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076
@DoubleBluff_Bandit
Look, I'm appreciating the pinnacle of German heavy weapons engineering. You can appreciate the greatest brade of Japanese engineering.
@Catwatch
Why'd she break your legs?
Milkmancer
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Sacremento_King
He spilled his milk.
He got too excited.
Sacremento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Milkmancer
Who, Smasher or the other guy?
Cheap shot, I had to take it.
Milkmancer
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Sacremento_King
Smasher would never spill his milk.
Impossible.
Catwatch
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Sacremento_King
I don't know, I just asked what made her so cool, and how I could be more like her.
Smal_Bongus
Replied on December 21, 2076
THE VIRGIN SAMURAI VS THE CHAD NAZI
Smasher-bros…
It's over…
Doofen_Dongus
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Bongus
Blitzkrieg-sama, I kneel
[Image of Adam Smasher, poorly edited to be kneeling.]
Weight_in_Gold
Replied on December 21, 2076
Wait, Smasher actually lost to a larping Nazibot?
SwordofSilence
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Weight_in_Gold
We're not actually sure. We only have the very barebones of the conflict known right now. We know the bot's name was 'Legacy of Aryas 88', which has strong indications of such, and we know they knocked down a couple buildings and the bot could throw lightning somehow.
The best guess we have right now is some sort of ionization beam from those back arms.
I was on the side of the cool bots, but now that they have Nazis, I'm not so sure.
Doofen_Dongus
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Weight_in_Gold
@SwordofSilence
IT WAS A DRAW
WHICH MEANS HE LOST!
IT'S OVER SMASHER-CHADS
End of Page. 1, 2, 3 ... 130, 131, 132, 133
Kn1GhtM4r3
Replied on December 21, 2076
@SwordofSilence
But nazis are cool, dumbass. Look at their old uniforms.
Shit was preem, aesthetic as fuck.
Alphas
Replied on December 21, 2076
Nazibot
Lost to a Man of Steel
Can't make this shit up folks.
SwordofSilence
Replied on December 21, 2076
We'll have to ask DangerGal for the footage, to be sure.
Sacremento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076
@SwordofSilence
Hopefully they don't cough it up with extra hair.
Goblin_Layer
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Sacremento_King
Hurm… Hairy Catgirls…
Sacremento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Goblin_Layer
I'm making a joke about hairballs, not…
Not whatever you're doing.
Alphas
Replied on December 21, 2076
@SwordofSilence
B*avo! You fucking larper! I /know/ you lurk here!
Give us the footage!
YOUR ICON IS CATMOSS, I KNOW YOU'RE HERE
SmashmeDaddy (Shitposter)
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Made another AMV of Smasher and Michiko, she just looked so sad that I couldn't help it.
[Vid Link]
Weight_in_Gold
Replied on December 21, 2076
This has to be a psyop. No way in hell Smasher wouldn't curbstomp the shit out of some rando nazi bot. And DG just so happened to be there to save the day ? This shit stinks more than a 4th rate Joytoy
@SmashmeDaddy
PREEMO
Sacremento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Alphas
I know this forum is pretty old, did Bartmoss ever post here?
@SmashmeDaddy
Seriously dude? Another AMV?
It's not even that good, I know you can do better.
Darkwraith_Lance (Original Poster) (Community Helper) (Verified Edgelord)
Replied on December 21, 2076
@Sacremento_King
Bartmoss created the old "Monkeys & Typewriters" forum back in the day. After he disappeared, it briefly split into three different forums, and then unified into the modern forum some years later.
TheEagleRises
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Now that Michiko has gotten a better haircut, she's actually a cutie now.
@Sacremento_King
Never Fade Away is always preemo, you uncultured swine.
The again, what can I expect from someone so obviously from P*ris with that shit taste?
@Darkwraith_Lance
That's how he spread his virus-hentai afterall.
Exolifter_And_Accessories
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Are we even sure that this is the same gonkfucker who tanked a nuke? They probably stuck some other bastard in his frame for propaganda reasons.
Goaker
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Exolifter_And_Accessories
How many lightning bolts can you tank, dumbass?
Gonk-ass retard.
Exolifter_And_Accessories
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Goaker
Three for your information, meatbrat!
Old Samsons are Ford-fucking tough!
Sacremento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@SmashmeDaddy
Can't you set it over some Neo-sov rock, man? That's the good stuff
@Exolifter_And_Accessories
Wait, you're a borg?
Man_of_Mystery (Oldestfag)
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Sacremento_King
Neo-Sov
More like
No Sovl
Gottem
Like_Lightning
Replied on December 21, 2076:
WHY THE FUCK AREN'T ANY OF YOU MAD?
THE CITY-WIDE BOUNTY?
I KNOW PEOPLE WHO DIED IN THAT SHIT!
WHAT IS YOU FUCKING DAMAGES?!
Samurai_Forever
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Like_Lightning
Fuck Saka.
It's never wrong to nuke the Japanese.
Sacremento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Because I'm in Sac town, dumbass.
I don't have my cheeks clenched for anything beyond flooding and the government.
40lbsofcrackcocaine
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Unironically living in NC
Imao, it's your own fault, gonkass
Burger_Borg
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Sacremento_King
@40lbsofcrackcocaine
City net doesn't extend past a few miles, larpers.
You're stuck in here with the rest of us.
Exolifter_And_Accessories
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Like_Lightning
Aint nowhere else with joytoys rancid enough to give an STD to a borg, fucker!
@Burger_Borg
He doesn't know about nomad-net.
EyeonthePrize
Replied on December 21, 2076:
This is 100% a false-flag operation.
Arasaka didn't lose anything more than low-value assets in this fight.
They're using this to gain leverage to expand their influence in NC.
@Like_Lightning
Hey newfriend, maybe Didit is more your speed?
Anyone who followed through with this bounty independently is a gonkass.
As for Saka, I couldn't care less.
Weight_in_Gold
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Hey, I heard something about a new Saka exec coming in from Japan, Anyone know anything about that?
Also, unrelated question here, is it normal for snow to burn?
End of Page. 1, 2, 3 ... 130, 131, 132, 133
Traumatized_Team_NC (Verified Corporate)
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Holy fucking shit the amount of platinum plans going off send help or cocaine!
Thicc_Thighs_and_Whatnot
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Great, another ecological catastrophe near the coast. The prognoses were saying that in 5 years they could open the beaches to the public, now it's gone to radioactive shitter.
Milkmancer
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Thicc_Thighs_and_Whatnot
He took vacation in NC beach
Gonk ass move
It was "clean in five years" since Time of the Red.
Onahole_Wannabe
Replied on December 21, 2076:
[Compilation Image of a very detailed set of measurements, comparisons, and screenshots calculating the exact dimensions of Adam Smasher's genitalia.]
Sacremento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Onahole_Wannabe
Why the fuck do you keep posting shit like this, you horny bitch?
Abbey_34 (Smasher Fangirl)
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Onahole_Wannabe
I HAVE A MIGHTY NEED.
On an unrelated note, Theoretically, how would you go about convincing Adam to use that fuckrod on you? Only hypotheticals of course.
TheEagleRises
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Onahole_Wannabe
Mods, please ban this whore already.
Overly_Literal_Productions
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Implying the whores haven't infiltrated the jannies.
Implying jannies are not fags that want their boypussies smashed by the Butcher
Mattie_Match
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Overly_Literal_Productions
Men
On the NET
Nice meme, retard.
Everyone knows all men don't last a month in the NET before getting killed by some succubus.
Settra
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Bartmoss Lives.
[Roll 1d1,000,000 : Result 666,666]
Sacremento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Overly_Literal_Productions
Or their Midnight Lady's
@Settra
AHHH, BARTMOSS-SAMA, I KNEEL!!!
Heiny_Huney
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Settra
Are those repeating digits? AHHH BARTMOSSMAN TASUKETE
Cyberpunk_Ethical
Replied on December 21, 2076:
[YALL MOTHERFUCKERS NEVER EVEN GOT A ROCK DROPPED ON YOU FROM OUTER SPACE]
Handsome_John
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Mattie_Match
Watch me, I'm on month two and behind three emergency exit safeguards
EDIT : How do I delete a post?
Minute_Kibble
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Handsome_John
he admitted it
Lmao.
Good luck, my guy.
The NET equivalent of sticking a "KICK ME" onto your back.
BiggerBoomstick
Replied on December 21, 2076:
The viscous whores, both human and AI, can't touch me through my blessed TempleDeck.
Gur_Flurgel
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Amen my brother, where'd you get yours?
I got mine from a nice old Italian Borg that's moving into Pacifica apparently. Real nice guy, my uncle is going to be working at the new Smasher church.
Sacremento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@BiggerBomstick
@Gur_Flurgel
C'mon guys, don't touch that Vatican schizotech. It's gonna fuck up your neural-system.
BiggerBoomstick
Replied on December 21, 2076:
You sure glow in the dark, Netwatch
Official_Netwatch (Verified Corporate)
Replied on December 21, 2076:
SHIT BOYS, THEY FOUND US!
ABORT! ABORT!
Handsome_John
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Guys, help me
Fucking help me!
I just said I was a guy!
What the fuck is going on?!
[Screenshot of private message inbox with 57 new messages]
Mantis_Man
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Handsome_John
Open NONE of those.
Gonkass move right there.
Sacremento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Handsome_John
Better hope it's not RaBiDs, idiot.
Bruce_The_Tiny
Replied on December 21, 2076:
All I wanted was a 144k UltraMegaHD full surround enhanced olfactory SeXXXBD of Smasher-san covered in gore of a thousand men, is that such a crime??
Bronado
Replied on December 21, 2076:
RABIDs would be his las problem, I've heard about the guy that opened a pus pic and got his Mr Studd perma softed.
Daily reminder that the best ICE is not being a fucking retard, practice safe NET-SECs.
End of Page. 1, 2, 3 ... 130, 131, 132, 133
Catwatch
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Hello fellow Monkey Message Boarders, it sure is a good day to stop asking questions about the possibility of AI involvement in these events.
@Handsome_John
How's it feel to not be an exec?
I'm posting behind seven proxy runners.
Alphas
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Catwatch
[Picture of Blackwall]
Vade Retro Satanas
Delete_California
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Speaking of the Blackwall, I've been sorting through the info-interference that Netwatch put up. Look at what I've managed to filter out :
[Audio of constant, distorted, metallic screaming]
(Don't worry, Netwatch never does anything anyway.)
Minute_Kibble
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Delete_California
Daily reminder not to anthropomorhise AIs. They're not "screaming", they're just copying sounds like slightly smarter bird.
Overly_Literal_Productions
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Delete_California
Yup that's aramaic. Damn you MM, you were right once more.
Keith_Killer
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Minute_Kibble
My Glorious Nipponese Mail-Order Raifu says otherwise, retard
Minute_Kibble
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Keith_Killer
Ok I admit, at the very least those mockingbirds sre smarter than (you).
Keith_Killer
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Minute_Kibble
I'm dumb and happy, unlike you who is just dumb
Railgunner_Randy
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Handsome_John
@Killer_Keith
You morons deserve to be eaten by Hellhound-chan
[Animated image of an female anthropomorphized Hellhound NET-construct]
Big_Man_On_The_NET (Info Bro)
Replied on December 21, 2076:
So guys, Whaler Infobro here.
Paid for the footage from DangerGal, cost me a clean 100k.
Here's the full footage of the Smasher vs Nazibot fight, recorded by one of their spy girls
[Vid link]
RealSteel
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Big_Man_On_The_NET
100,000 eddies for that?
It's a damn good vid but not worth that much surely
Titty_Stickies
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Big_Man_On_The_NET
Behind a paywall
Fuck off, those are my eddies
Doofen_Dongus
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Big_Man_On_The_NET
Nazibot-sama... I kneel.
All_Black_Chrome
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Big_Man_On_The_NET
Smasher outrun a fucking lightning
Saburo you asian jew stop breaking into Demiurge's house
Darkwraith_Lance (Original Poster) (Community Helper) (Verified Edgelord)
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@RealSteel
He's lying, DangerGal standard info sale cost never exceeds 10k
Having said that, holy shit Smasher literally fought an army with a sword and a bunch of knives and was making good progress on it until the fucking Cyberwalks showed up.
Sacremento_King
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Big_Man_On_The_NET
Okay, now just looking at that vid, it's pretty fucking neat
And by neat, I mean holy fucking shit the dude fucking intercepted lightning multiple times with a fucking knife.
RealSteel
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Darkwraith_Lance
The Catjew strikes again.
Brogus
Replied on December 21, 2076:
The eternal Cigger
[User was Banned for this post]
[MOD : [Image of a angry looking woman with cat-ear mods]
Gonkfucker
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Big_Man_On_The_NET
Wait, Dangergal hires dudes?
Those are some real lucky bastards, surrounded by catgirls all day every day
Mantis_Man
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Gonkfucker
They're probably gay so they can all have a boy talk.
No straight man would suffer in a workplace with over twenty women.
SmashmeDaddy (Shitposter)
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Gonkfucker
He FUCKS them all, all you catgirl fan /dg/enerates are ducks
Ginger_Minger
Replied on December 21, 2076:
My Yankee-chan works with a MALE! THE WHORE [IMG of burning merch in the dumpster]
Average_Futanari_Enjoyer
Replied on December 21, 2076:
Yeah but look at his Twink bussy.
[IMG LINK of DangerGal operative Call Sign Alpha bending over]
Heehoo_Peanut
Replied on December 21, 2076:
@Average_Futanari_Enjoyer
UUUUUUOOOOOOHHHHHHH!!!
[Vid of a monkey with cybernetic eyes, steadily growing more and more excited]
RealSteel
Replied on December 22, 2076:
[Image of Adam Smasher's face, looking off to the side of the camera]
"Brat, did I ever tell you about Dangergal? They were Michiko's little attempt at making it big independently, a private security/detective agency themed around catgirls. They all had the tightest asscheeks and perkiest breasts money could buy, illegal in NUSA due to their sheer authenticity. I used to run a train over them after I finished fucking their boss you know, and they all knew how to handle a Mr Studd better than any other corpo whores. They all wore miniskirts too, and because they had retarded bioware tails, they couldn't wear panties, so you'd constantly get glimpses of their Midnight Ladies as they sliced some meatbag in two, it was surreal. She taught them to hold their thermal katanas backwards and their agents constantly got captured by gangs and nomads every other day. It was like a constant XBD every other day, Brat. And they were good friends."
End of Page. 1, 2, 3 ... 130, 131, 132, 133