I have a secret: I was ROBed almost a quarter of a century ago.

What? No, not robbed! That would have made everything so much easier if someone had just broken into my house and nabbed my stuff.

No. I was ROBed!

On my way home from somewhere (I don't even remember anymore) I got hit by a truck. The next I knew, I was a baby. Thankfully, it was obvious enough that I was in Mass Effect when I started seeing asari, salerians, turians, biotics, omni tools and all the other stuff of that universe.

This revelation was followed by the thought of 'cool I'm in Mass Effect!'

Which was swiftly followed by 'fuck, I'm in Mass Effect'.

That universe with the sentient killer space ships that come around every so often and kill off intelligent life.

I won't deny I was a 'bit' scared at first. It wasn't until after many years of wallowing in fear and anxiety that I finally grew a backbone.

I wasn't going to just sit on my ass and wait for the Reapers to come om-nom-noming for the galaxy. No, I was going to take the fight to them! They would learn to fear MY name as much as they did Shepard's in canon!

I was going to be a hero.

Not the hero of course, usurping that spot would cause way too many butterflies for my liking.

Of course, that was the end goal, now I just needed the 'how' and I would be good to go.

While I only began to seriously consider this idea a decade ago, I'm pretty sure I can work this out. I wasn't just a Mass Effect fanboy, but I was also a college grad in my past life. I'd like to think with those combined skill sets I can at least achieve something like that. A nice mix of foreknowledge and critical thinking!

And the plan I've concocted: become the Shadow Broker and move behind the scenes to prepare the Galaxy!

Yes, I know, a simple plan.

Of course, my whole plan hinges on a single throwaway line from Lair of the Shadow Broker; that the Broker's ship was way older than he was. So that means all I have to do is train up, gather up some muscle, fly on over to Hagalaz, double tap whoever is sitting in the big chair right now, and become the new Shadow Broker!

Easy!

Ugh…easy….

Still, I'm pretty sure that me becoming the Broker is going to screw up some events in the timeline. Maybe for the better in some cases, but butterfly effects are so unpredictable. And that's before taking into account I would be torpedoing Liara's storyline.

But I feel that as long as my involvement stays at a relatively minimal level, on the grand stage, then the whole Reaper nonsense will be starting up sometime around the early 2180s. Plenty of time to work my magic and do my part for the fight!

Of course that means I have a lot of stuff to do just to set up everything. The first thing was getting some military training. Also, some biotic training so I can be a space wizard. Yes, I know there is a very reasonable explanation as to why people can fling things around with their minds, but I don't care. I want to be a space wizard!

Hmm but then what?

Maybe work with Shepard? Of course, that might depend on if he/she is a paragon or a renegade. I can work with a goody two shoes paragon or a paragon with a renegade streak. But a pure renegade? We might have some problems then. I was not going to sacrifice the geth or krogan babies just to satisfy-

My planning was interrupted by my door opening.

"Aleena, go to sleep already. It's way past your bedtime,"

"It's not even that late Liselle," I shoot back, the dark room being lit by the glow of my monitor. Probably not good for my developing eyes to be in a pitch-black room with a single bright source of light. The spell effects from Galaxy of Fantasy giving the room a strobe-like light.

My sister was clearly unhappy about my 'late night' activities.

"It's past nine!" Liselle flipped the light on and pointed at the clock by my bed. Clocks were the only way to tell time on this fucking station.

"That's not late, and I'm not even tired!" I watch on in glee as my level 124 nightwitch destroys another mob of technotheists. "And I'm twenty-three, I don't need a bedtime anymore."

"You're a growing girl and you need your sleep," looked like big sister was not going to let up.

"I don't need a bedtime anymore," In insisted. Fucking God(dess), ROB just had to stick me in the body of the one race that develops at a snail's pace. Asari. The green (blue) alien space babes of the Mass Effect setting that can live for a thousand years. And since they (or I guess we) can live so long, our aging is so slow.

While I was twenty three, for asari that was basically ten or so years old by human standards.

I guess it could have been worse. I could have been a salarian and be 'middle aged' now and die long before the story starts. Or be born a krogan and never be able to walk around without half of any given room staring at me as if I was going to go on a murder spree at any given moment.

Then again, since I am sure I will be able to live to the start of 'canon, this brings up the awkward issue of WHEN I am.

Actually, that's not true. I know what the current year is: It's 2544 Galactic Standard.

Which means nothing to me for the purposes of finding out where in the timeline I am since no one in the games used the Galactic Standard calendar!

It turns out that for some 'mysterious' reason, the Citadel doesn't use the Gregorian Calendar.
What? Human time measurement isn't being used before humans show up? How unexpected!

Joking aside, this has caused some issues with my mental 'scheduling' of events. I don't have a definite time frame to work with. Sure there are some things that I can easily look up to get a rough estimate, the quarians having already been driven from Rannoch and being in the Migrant Fleet for over a century already lets me know I'm not that far off from canon, by asari standards.

But that still means anywhere from one to three centuries!

For the moment, I suppose I'll have to rely on the Liara Time (LT) for my time based needs.

Given that she is 'one hundred and six' in 2183, that would mean she was born in 2077 by the normal calendar. So for now, I am stuck using the crappy Galactic Standard calendar until this point of reference appears and I can start charting stuff properly!

All I have to do is cyber stalk a well known Matriarch until she pops out a kid.

…

You know, it didn't sound as creepy in my head…

"You also have class tomorrow," Liselle's voice dragged me from my musings. 'Class' referred to the extranet tutoring I got since Omega didn't really have anything along the lines of a 'school' here. Rich people either sent their kids to a nearby world or hired tutors.

"But I already know everything, " I huffed. A slight exaggeration on my part, I just had a 'head start' compared to other kids my age. Humming I quickly type out a thanks to one of my party members for healing me. "Besides, father doesn't care about my grades as long as I'm not stupid."

"This isn't a debate Aleena," oh Liselle was putting her foot down. "It's time for bed, and I will turn off the extranet if I have to."

"Goddess fine!" I quickly type some halfhearted apologies in the chat to my party before logging out. "Happy?"

"Yes, thank you," Liselle sighed, crossing her arms as I snuggled under the covers of my oversized bed and surrounded by a small mountain of stuffed animals. "You can play your games all you want after your studies are done. And you know father does care about your grades."

"Good night, Liselle," I flip my body so I'm facing the wall away from her.

"Good night Aleena," I can hear her sigh as she closes the door behind her.

Maybe I'm being a bit too hard on Liselle. She's doing the best she can, but I can tell she feels a bit out of her depth with me. While on the cusp of her matron stage, she was very much still a 'maiden'. Too filled with wanderlust and youthful vigor to want to settle down yet.

But I can hardly pretend to be a kid like all the other twenty something year old asari. So, I took on the guise of a 'prodigy'. A 'genius'! A straight 'A' student (though the VI tutoring program doesn't use the human typical letter grading system but the point stands!).

In reality, I'd like to think I was merely above average intelligence, just with a head start and in an age bracket that people expected far less from.

As for dad, yeah, no way she actually cares about my education beyond me not being a brain dead idiot. As long as I passed my courses, anything more was just icing on the cake.

Dad has a very hands-off approach to parenting, with a heavy 'by your own bootstrap' mindset. If I couldn't do something myself, I shouldn't be doing it at all. Liselle has been more involved in my life then she has, though more as a 'cool big sister' then as a parental replacement.

Even still, at least they were here!

My new mom is a complete no show!

Sure, I get birthday cards with heartfelt messages and credit chits filled to the brim with money, but I've never so much as seen my mom. Not only that, I'm not allowed to know who she is. Liselle knows, saying we have the same mom since we're full sisters, but refuses to say anything.

Which implies we have half-sisters on our mother's side. So that's something.

Maybe it was because I was a pureblood? Since mom and dad were both asari mom might be ashamed of my birth? But Liselle never implied that mom disliked her at all, and such a thing would be a little too cliché for my liking.

Eh…

A question for another time.

All I should do now, is try and fall asleep.

…

Or now that Liselle is gone, maybe just one quick daily quest before bed…

"Tired?"

"No, just a little groggy is all," I mumble to one of my 'babysitters' (guards) as I rub my eyes and yawn. I went back and played more Galaxy of Fantasy. Just one daily quest I told myself.

Then it moved to 'just one dungeon'.

Then 'just' one raid. A short one at that.

In and out in half an hour, an hour max.

But you probably know how these things go. One thing led to another and I went to sleep close to one in the morning.

By this age in my human body, I could work with less than five hours of sleep. But a twenty-three-year-old asari is basically a kid so it's hard for me to 'rebound' as easily.

Add in the five hours of online schooling that followed, and I was almost ready to fall over. When the VI ended the class, I was already halfway to crawling underneath my sheets before my omni tool chimed.

Dad wanted to see me.

Of course, since I was 'only' twenty-three, some of her men escorted me through the actually nice-looking district I lived in, then past the usual poverty-stricken landscape of Omega with enough firepower to give any would-be thug second thoughts.

Then a short car ride (flight?) later, I was in front of Afterlife. The closest thing to a 'Government building' on this damn station. If only all government buildings doubled as clubs with black jack and hookers.

"Hey kid, this isn't the place for little girls," the batarian bouncer remarked when he saw me approach, passing all the other people waiting in line to get it. A few rowdy patrons looked like they wanted to say something about the preteen looking asari just cutting the line a simple look at my 'babysitters' however was enough to make them back down.

"Then why are you here?" I admit, I did like to see how far I could push people before they'd pushed back. Also developed a bit of a snarky streak. Liselle said I got it from dad. I think I was always just an asshole though.

"Cute," he chuckled at my quip. "Head on in, your mom's probably waiting for you in the back."

The fact this guy said my 'mom' was waiting for me probably meant he wasn't in the loop. Everyone who was 'in the know' was keenly aware that she only ever refers to herself as my 'father'.

Or maybe this was all some big double bluff, he knows who my father is but said 'mom' to give the impression to any eavesdroppers that I wasn't her kid.

Or maybe, most likely, I was overthinking this.

Even so, Afterlife was about what I expected from the games. Loud music, neon lights, drunk mercs, and asari dancers everywhere. The dancers were actually a tad more revealing than I remember them being from the games. Not strange, this is a club in a lawless space station where decency is at a premium.

True to the bouncer's words, dad really was 'in the back'. Go past the main stage, and there's an access hallway. Go down the hallway, and you'll find a single breaker box at the end, and said box had a small camera in it to let dad know to open the door to her personal office hidden by a false wall.

She couldn't do all her meetings out in the open now could she?

If I'd never seen the wall move before, or expected it to part, I would have never known it was a secret entrance. One of dozens to her office if I had to guess, but this was the only one I, and her more trusted goons, knew of.

For what I assume in her main office, it was pretty spartan for what you'd expect the Pirate Queen of Omega to have. A desk, some chairs, dozens of screens, and a simple bed. Nothing more or less. That being said, it probably also has an impressive suit of electronic countermeasures and anti-spying stuff built into it all.

And sitting at her desk was my father: Aria T'loak.

She looked up from her console when I approached her desk and motioned to my babysitters, "leave us." The trio nodded and quickly shuffled their way out, the door closing behind them.

Looking at her, it was easy to see the similarity between us. Though I was a little 'bluer' than she was, and I didn't have those markings on my face. Liselle said I took more after her then our mom, but that hardly means anything when I don't even know who my mother is.

An awkward silence followed Aria focused on her terminal, and I casually thought of a way to break the ice.

"So…Father," while I use the term dad in my head, the correct word for the parent who didn't birth you was 'father'. And Aria hated being called 'Mother'. "How-"

"Do you know why I had you come here?" Aria interrupted. No 'hi kid how're you doing' from Aria, always straight to the point. It always feels like I'm speaking to an estranged aunt and not my own father.

"I-..No," I replied, though quietly I was worried she'd found out about all the microtransactions I had charged to my personal chit. It was supposed to be used for emergencies only, but dammit it felt like an emergency when I saw an item in the auction house and I paid for a few (dozen) fantasy tokens to outright buyout the item.

"Do you remember what you asked me a decade ago?" She asked.

"Eh…" What? "I think I've said a lot of things to you over…"

"Don't be smart with me Aleena," that retort sent a chill down my spine. Aria was quite the authoritarian even as a parent. Perhaps especially as a parent. Never physically, she never beat me or anything, but she did not mince her words or leave her opinion unambiguous. "It was about your future. Do you remember or not?"

"I- No, I don't. I don't even know what you're talking about," I confessed, not wanting to try my luck again with being cheeky.

"It was your thirteenth birthday," Aria continued, typing on her console before walking across the room to pour herself a drink. "You just finished opening your gifts and your sister asked you what you wanted to be when you grew up, do you remember what you told her?"

"No," I shook my head.

"When she asked if you wanted to be a justicar, you said 'no, I want to be a commando'," she fished around for a datapad left on her bed.

"I did?" I remember saying a lot of things when I was 'younger'. And I don't remember most of it.

"You did," she nodded. "I didn't think anything of it. You're a kid, and kids have wild dreams. Some want to be commandos, or Justicars, others to be Councilors, some even more ridiculous. But I don't know of how many kids who look up asari commando training regimes in their spare time. They tend to focus on the other, more flashy, aspects of the job.

Okay, yeah, my extranet is absolutely bugged.

Wait! More important to knowing my dad has my extranet bugged is that there's no way she doesn't know how many credits I've spent on Galaxy of Fantasy! Or my search history! Oh shit, I need to-

"And while you are still just a kid, I know you're smart enough to at least understand the type of commitment that sort of life demands," she continued, ignoring my internal panic. "So, I'll be blunt: do you still want to be a commando?"

"What?" This was not how I envisioned this meeting going.

"You heard me," Aria leaned back in her seat, almost downing her drink in one gulp. "I know I'm not the most…conventional of parents, but as your father I do have an obligation to help you achieve your goals. Within reason, of course."

'An obligation?' Wow, really making me feel wanted dad. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.

"Becoming a commando is not something to be taken lightly," her tone hardened, snapping me out of my thoughts. "It's not something you can do as a hobby on the side, or half ass until you're bored. You either dedicate yourself fully or you don't, there's no in-between."

Reminds me of the wise words of my (first) youth: 'Do or do not, there is no try,'

Though I still had one big question. "Why bring this up now?"

"Because it's not just the training that takes years, but the preparation for the training takes years," Aria explained. "Do you really think you can just walk up to a huntress at thirty, with absolutely no experience, and just ask to be taken as a disciple?"

"I…didn't really think of it like that," I answered honestly. I'd just thought the whole thing was like joining the military, you know, sign up when you meet the minimum age and they'll get you into shape. At least, that's what the stuff I've read so far said.

Then again, I only just started looking into commando training at all so…

"Of course, you didn't," Aria made a sort of face before downing another entire. "Still, the question stands: do you want it or not?"

"D-do I have to decide right now?" This was way too sudden for me. I mean, I'll probably say yes in the end, but to just have it dumped on me like this.

"No, but I'd like an answer by the end of the week," Aria's eyes seemed to bore into me, looking for any hesitation on my end. "Even if the training is just twenty to thirty years long, and you hang up your leathers in your matron stage, the lifestyle will burn itself into you for the rest of your life. "

"Oh," was all I could say. I mean, what else could I say?

She shooed me out of her office soon after, apparently all that needed to be said was said.

I think it was before the skycar even landed back home that I decided I would take dad up on her offer. Yeah sure, it's a little sooner than I might have thought, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Earlier training means earlier moves to take down the Shadow Broker. That alone would give me way more breathing room to maneuver and prepare the galaxy.

And besides that, how demanding could training for a twenty-three-year-old asari be?

"Hmm, that could have gone worse," Aria admitted, pouring herself another drink. She was hardly a 'normal' parent. Then again, Aleena was hardly a 'normal' kid. Too smart for her own good, at least a bit smarter than Aria was at her age.

A cheeky brat to boot who knew exactly what she was doing most of the time no matter what she claimed. Sort of like a cat that likes to play with her food, preening and prodding, yet still managed to reel back in the worst of her personality by realizing she wasn't the smartest in the room.

Guess she took after both her parents then.

"Why'd you lie to her?" Tevos questioned. The woman was on the other end of the comm link she opened when Aleena walked in. Audio only. The rate for a seamless Citadel to Terminus connection, even just audio, was twenty-five credits a minute.

Twenty-five credits a minute and the authorities dared to call her operations criminal! Hell, maybe she was in the wrong market after all.

But Tevos insisted on at least listening into the conversation, even if she didn't actually say anything. Big life choices, mother's presence, and all that.

"Did I?"

"Don't play coy with me Aria," she'd been silent throughout the whole meeting, if only she'd stay that way after the fact.

"Then please explain what I 'lied' about, exactly?"

"Commando training starts at thirty, not before," she argued. "You're pushing our daughter into something she's too young for."

"You and I both know that some families with strong huntress traditions start their daughters' training regimes much earlier than this," like mine, went unsaid. "I'm hardly going to tell her to give me singularities on command, bullseye target dummies, all after running ten kilometers. Just some basic exercises, hand eye coordination, and small arms training. Even if she decides this isn't for her, these are good skills for anyone to have."

"You're going to give a twenty-three-year-old a gun!" Even without visuals, Aria could feel the face Tevos was making.

"Supervised training at a firing range is hardly 'giving' her anything," Aria rolled her eyes. "Besides, I'm just fanning the fire already in her."

"Didn't you just say to her how children have ridiculous dreams?"

"And I also know when someone is serious about something," she corrected. "Aleena's the sort of girl who does what she sets her mind to. So, she'll either rise to the occasion or she won't. Nothing more to it."

Like father, like daughter. For better or worse…

"She's my daughter!" Aria could hear Tevos slam her hands down on her desk from wherever she was on Citadel Space. "Not some orphan you can press to be one of your hired thugs! I will not let you make her some common criminal!"

"And she's not just your daughter," Aria continued. Her daughter? The very notion made Aria snort.

Despite their relation, Liselle was raised by her mother on Thessia and only came to Aria when she was already in her early one-twenties. Aria had almost forgotten about the girl, beyond the odd message Tevos would send appraising her of Liselle's developments, until some wanderlust filled maiden just showed up at Afterlife one day with nothing more than a pistol asking for work.

Not to say she doesn't value and care for Liselle, the girl was one of her most trusted lieutenants and Aria would be lying if she said she didn't feel a paternal connection to the girl. But Aria wasn't there for her childhood, didn't see her grow up, didn't have a hand in the woman she became. There was a distance between the two that no amount of camaraderie, mutual respect, or trust could cross.

She felt more aunt than father to Liselle.

But Aleena?

She didn't even know Tevos was pregnant with her, but she was certain she knew the exact night it happened. One evening in Nos Astra that was little more than a lurid blur of drinking, arguing, and fucking. The only thing Aria really remembers that night was drunkenly mumbling to Tevos about 'an azure never lying'.

There must have been some porn vid playing for Aira to ever think of saying something ridiculous like that.

Ugh, Aria just wishes she had drunk enough to forget everything.

Regardless, Aleena was foisted upon Aria a few months after her birth. She wanted to refuse Tevos then and there. The woman had no right pulling that shit on her.

Liselle was one thing, she was already an adult by the time she met Aria, she was hardly a parent and Omega was hardly a suitable place to raise a kid.

Their argument got so heated Aria remembers one of Tevos's guards pulling a gun on her.

But those same damnable paternal instincts she felt for Liselle flared up yet again when she first saw Aleena in her crib. A little blue bundle that was her's.

Aria doesn't regret the choice she made, she loves the kid from the bottom of her heart, though she still curses herself from time to time for making it. To make matters worse, it turned out Aleena had a horrific ability to worm her way into Aria's heart. Digging deeper and deeper every year that went by. Impossible to remove now without tearing her heart to shreds.

"And I'm hardly making her a 'criminal'," Aria continued. "She can be whatever she wants to be. A commando, merc, join a republican guard, try to become a spectre, hell she could even say screw it and dance away her maiden years shaking her tits for credits. I'd support her, isn't that what a good parent is supposed to do?"

"She's still just a child!" Tevos repeated.

"Yes, a child. Not some doll that will break at the slightest touch," she noticed her glass was empty. If this conversation was going to go on any longer, she'd needed a stronger drink. "Besides, brawn isn't everything. She's smart for her age. Hell, I think she's actually smarter than some of my men, which honestly says more about them than Aleena. Of course, you'd know this if you actually raised her."

"That's cruel, even for you."

"No. What's cruel is forcing a kid I had no idea even existed onto me."

"She wouldn't have been safe on Thessia."

"And you think she's safe on Omega?" That got a laugh out of the pirate. "Why not just drop her on Tuchanka? At least her death would have been quick. You know, there are some people who get their kicks from young asari."

"…I love our daughters," Tevos said suddenly, defending herself and actions with that single sentence. As if it were enough to absolve her of tossing her child onto Omega.

"I never said you didn't. But there's obviously things you love just a little bit more," Aria should have stopped it there, but her mouth ran before her mind caught up. "By the way, how is your election to replace Julina on the Council going?"

Aria heard Tevos take a deep breath over the call, she was an expert in controlling her emotions. You have to be if you work on the Citadel. Also a tad cruel on her part, Julina has been running circles around Tevos last she saw.

"… I'll have my people start looking through dossiers of reputable Huntresses who may be taking on students in the near future and forward them to you. Bill any equipment she may need to the usual account."

"Thank you," Aria downed her drink in a single gulp.

Tevos didn't reply, the call terminated from her end.

Aria eyed the half empty bottle and sighed.

That was one way to end a conversation.

AN: Ah yes, another happy story!

Before writings I was torn between this story and one set in an Alternate Universe where Humanity and the Protheans existed in the same cycle with the POV shifting between 'Ancient' and 'Modern' history (playing up the misunderstandings of the Citadel races to the Human-Prothean Cycle). In the end, decided on this story over that one since I feel it has a 'wider appeal' then the latter and it's a fair bit easier to write.

Point of fact, this story idea (Pirate Princess I mean) was inspired by a fic I read here years ago. Can't remember the exact title, but it was about an OC/SI asari orphan growing up on Illium.

Now, for anyone who has been following my other works and is (maybe) saying to themselves "Midas, you started another story!" well I actually have some good news: I've actually been working on this story for a few months (posting on other sites) before finally deciding to bring it here.

And since I've been working on it for some time, guess who has a backlog to work through~