Badge & O'Possum: Ace Attorneys

by Mind Jack

In an increasingly crime-ridden Zootopia, murder is nothing new, and with it comes the need for a firm finger of justice to defend the innocent. Unfortunately for the innocent, their only defense might just be Eric Badge and Delilah O'Possum, a pair of civil lawyers who have never taken on a murder trial in their lives.

13. A Study in Turnabout: Part 10

Episode 2: A Study in Turnabout

Part 10: The Cat's in the Bag

July 12th, 11:12 AM

Lower Canopy Upper Courthouse - Courtroom No. 4

Delilah readied herself as the next, and last, witness was brought in. After fighting so hard to figure out everyone's role in this convoluted affair, it was finally time to confront the dark criminal mastermind behind it all.

"Heeeeeeeeeey, guuuuuuuuuuys!" Ria slurred, giving a tipsy wave. "Wassuuuuuuuup!"

(Roll with it.) "You don't need to know 'wassup', because the only direction you're going is down!"

Kyle rolled his eyes. "Let's get this over with. Witness, please state your name and occupation."

"Ria Nepeta, little masky dude. Gardener." Ria blinked a few times, eyes going wide. "Whoa. I just had the most wicked déjà vu."

"It's not just you, witness. You have been here before," Kyle explained. "The defense seems to be under the impression that you are Lord Tigre's killer."

"Nyawhaaaa? That's wiiiiiiiiild." Ria turned and tipped her cat hat to Delilah. "But hey, I guess I'm not that shocked. Ms. Ninja Lawyer has accused pretty much everyone else, right? She had to get to me eventually."

(Is she just mocking me now? Wait, has she BEEN mocking me? Oh, that does it!) "Ms. Nepeta! I can assure you, my theory is based on solid evidence. Evidence I bet you won't be happy to provide."

"Dang, seriously?" She scratched her head. "Sorry, Ms. Ninja Lawyer, but I don't know what you're talking about. I've been more outta sorts than ever since this all started. Really been making me wonder if the nip's even doing anything for me anymore."

Ria grinned, giving a thumbs-up. "So… I decided. I'm kicking the habit for good. Ria Nepeta's goin' clean!"

Delilah glared. "…"

Kyle stared. "…"

And Loggins hardly cared. "…I don't believe you."

"No, really!" Ria insisted. "I mean it this time! I said I could stop whenever I wanted and I did! Even destroyed my whole bong collection to prove it! I think that's, like, three of the twelve steps at once."

The courtroom went quiet.

Delilah was the first to put two and two together. "You… You did WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?!" She fell to the floor.

Kyle fell over too, laughing.

It took him nearly a full minute to stop. The mad cackling actually made several members of the jury and gallery visibly uncomfortable.

But eventually, he recovered. "Ah, your whole case, gone in a puff of bongsmoke from an addict's sense of self-improvement!" He gave a satisfied sigh. "...MacTalon, I'm still on the floor. Can you help me up?"

Clearly embarrassed about having to come out of the gallery, Detective MacTalon stalked over to the prosecution's bench, grabbed Kyle by the scruff of his neck with one paw, and lifted him to his feet. He brushed himself off, nodding thanks.

Muttering to herself, MacTalon actually left the courtroom, slamming the doors behind her.

"Well. That was anticlimactic…" Loggins remarked. "Right. That's it then. Witness, you're dis—"

Objection!

"The defense still has a right to cross-examine this witness!" Delilah said sternly.

"Examine what?" Kyle demanded. "She hasn't testified!"

"But there's something she can testify about!" Delilah reminded him. "There's still one aspect of this case that we know for sure she was involved in! And that's the moment when she found the fish!"

"I already told you guys about that though." Ria continued to look as confused as ever. "I don't think we really need to go over it again, right prosecuting dude?"

Kyle frowned for a moment, but gave a nod. "The prosecution concedes the defense's point. The witness will testify."

"Nyahuh?" And now she had taken an extra level in confusion. "Like, aren't you supposed to be on my side?"

"The defense has proposed a theory," Kyle replied. "A completely nonsensical theory, but I won't deny her the chance to try proving it anyway. So proceed."

Delilah was looking into the confusion class herself. She turned to Eric. "Is Kyle actually helping us?"

"He probably just doesn't want a boring ending," Eric concluded. "I wouldn't look into it. You need to focus on breaking apart Ms. Nepeta's testimony. This is the only chance you're getting."

(Fine. I'll give him more entertainment than he can stomach if that's what it takes!) "You heard him, witness. Proceed."

"..." Ria gave a shrug. "Alright, if that's what you lawyer dudes want. Guess we're all gonna be getting some wicked déjà vu."

Witness
Testimony

~ One Fish, Two Fish, Like Twenty Fish, Dudes ~

"So, I was out working in the garden, right?"

"But then I see something fly past my head!"

"I was like, 'Whoa, was that real?' And it totally was, too!"

"So I went to check it out and, hey, it was some fish."

"It wasn't all that interesting though, so I kicked some dirt over it and carried on."

"That's, like, pretty much it, dudes."

After another uncomfortable silence, it became clear they weren't getting any more. "I don't suppose you have a plan?" Eric asked.

"A little bit of one," Delilah replied nervously.

He nodded reassuringly. "Remember, if we're right, this is all one big lie. Even if it's minor, there has to be something in there."

"I hope so. That's what I'm gunning for."

Loggins banged her gavel. "The defense will begin its cross-examination."

Cross
Examination

~ One Fish, Two Fish, Like Twenty Fish, Dudes ~

"So I was outside in the garden, right?"

Hold it!

"Was Lord Tigre watching you then?" Delilah asked.

"Nyahuh. Every now and again," Ria recalled. "He seemed really busy that day. So a lot of the time he was either staring at stuff on his desk, or doing something in other parts of the room."

(Firing your entire staff does sound like a lotta work. So there was plenty of room for Ria to swipe some of the fish without being seen. But I can't prove she did based just on that.) "Please add that bit to your testimony," Delilah requested.

"Sure, if you want, dude."

"Did you see a contradiction there?" Eric asked, brow furrowed.

"Not exactly. But I had a thought. She's using her junkie powers to be all vague and nondescript, right? Even so, if I ask her for more detail, she has to provide it."

"I'm not sure I understand what you're getting at."

"Just watch then. I've got an idea."

"I was working in front of Lord Tigre's window. Guy was watching me, just not always."

"But then I see something fly past my head!"

"I was like, 'Whoa, was that real?' And it totally was, too!"

"So I went to check it out and, hey, it was some fish."

Hold it!

"Just to clarify then, this was the Delishafish Lord Tigre threw from his window?"

"Nyahuh. Not that I knew it at the time. But based on what you guys described, that was totally it."

"Described how?"

Ria tilted her head, the cat hat tilting with her. "Uhhh... It was all red and white and spiky. Don't know what else it would be."

She nodded. "Good. Please add that to your testimony."

"It's a rare dish. It's understandable she wouldn't know what it looked like at the time," Eric advised.

"That's not what I'm going for," Delilah said, eyes staying on the witness.

"It was that Delishafish thing. All red and white and pokey all over."

Hold it!

"N-Nyawha? Again?"

"What else did you notice about the fish?" Delilah pressed. "Did it look weird in any way?"

Ria paused for several seconds. Delilah had a pretty good idea what she was thinking. "...No, it didn't look weird at all. At least, not from how it was described."

(Hook, line, sinker.) "Alright. Please add that to your testimony."

"...Fine."

"It was that Delishafish thing. It looked just as described, nothing weird about it."

Objection!

"Your Honor, there was something rather odd about that statement!" Delilah said, smirking.

"So it's not weird, but it was odd?" Ria mused, clearly confused.

"What do you mean, defense?" Loggins asked.

Delilah brought up the evidence photo of the spoiled Delishafish on her phone. "Tell me, Your Honor, when you look at this, do you immediately notice anything about it?"

The bailiff brought the phone over to Loggins, who squinted at it. "Well, there is the big chunk cut off of it."

The possum nodded. "Exactly. Whether it was the victim or someone else, we know that fish was cut at some point, since we found the missing piece. Yet Ms. Nepeta saw the fish, and thought nothing was off about it."

"What's your point?" Kyle asked with a flippant chuckle. "She probably just didn't notice."

She shook her head. "This same feline was able to see and describe the blood on Monty's knife, while he was on the roof and she was on ground level. I very much doubt that."

"You think she's lying?" Eric asked.

Delilah smiled. "No. No I don't. I think the chunk just hadn't been removed yet when she found it."

"Wait, what?" Kyle pushed his glasses up, face growing more serious. "Explain."

"It's simple. Ms. Nepeta didn't notice the missing chunk because she's the one who cut it off!" Delilah replied. "That's why it didn't register to her to lie about it!"

"Nyaaaaaack!" Ria pulled her hat over her head. "T-There's a totally good explanation for that, dude!"

"She cut it off so she could poison the pin, while making it look like Lord Tigre ate the fish in case it was discovered!" Delilah continued. "Then she brought it into her gardening shed and custom-made a blowgun out of a bong!"

"Nyaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!" She yanked it down even tighter, holding the brim in a death grip.

"And once her weapon was made, she shot Lord Tigre, used her protective gear to enter the study, tampered with the crime scene, and made her escape!" Delilah slammed the bench. "Admit it, Ria! That's how you pulled off this murder!"

"Nyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa—OOMPH!" She finally pulled it too far, the entire hat now engulfing her head, the crown ripping off to let her ears through. The cheetah struggled to free herself, pulling at it wildly while the rest of the court stared on.

(Should we… help her…?)

Before anyone could decide, Ria stopped struggling, suddenly going still. While her hat continued to make a cute cat face, Delilah had a feeling her actual expression was now very different.

"…So that's all it takes, huh?" Ria asked darkly. "Just like that, I'm the killer now? Guess it's true what everyone says. The legal system really has gone to shit."

She slowly reached up, her gloved paws clenched into fists. And then…

SHING

Sharp claws burst through the fingers of her gloves, gleaming menacingly. They latched on to the brim of her hat, once again tugging violently at it. But it was only the brim that began to tear… and it was soon ripped away completely.

"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" What was left of the hat now formed a grotesque mask, not unlike the head of a scarecrow, with two button eyes and a stitched-on smile wide enough to make the Cheshire Cat blush.

Ria held one paw in front of her new face, flexing her gleaming claws. "Nya ha ha ha. That'll do."

Grumpy Yeen stared blankly. "So… Is this supposed to make us think she's not the killer?"

"Tactically-speaking, it is an unusual choice," said Otterly Adorable.

Biker Wolf turned to Camo Dog. "Hey, I guess bag gal must be a spy too then, right?"

"Hmm. Nah, I don't see it."

(Still only the second-scariest adaptation of 'The Cat in the Hat'.) "Uh… Ms. Nepeta? Are you feeling alright?"

"Oh yeah, never better! Nothing like a murder accusation to really sober a gal up," Ria replied. "I'm raring to go! Just watch!"

Then she disappeared from the stand.

"Whoa, what? Where did she goAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Delilah jumped a good foot off the ground as Ria was suddenly right in front of her, leaning against the bench and checking her claws.

"Pretty nice deduction you had there, Ms. Ninja Lawyer. Of course, it's less impressive when you basically got here through process of elimination. Did you really think it was me, or did you just not wanna accuse poor little Lara anymore?"

Before she could respond, Ria was gone again, vanishing like a blur.

She reappeared at the prosecutor's bench. "And as for you, the so-called 'Bullseye Prosecutor'. You sure seem to be missing your mark more often than not lately, don't ya think?"

Kyle calmly narrowed his eyes. "You would do well to not bite the hand that feeds you, witness."

"Ms. Nepeta!" Loggins slammed her gavel. "You will cease your tomfoolery and return to the witness stand at once!"

She did, but not without company. Ria reappeared, pushing a wooden cart behind the stand. Atop it stood a large, rectangular hedge nearly twice her size. The cheetah looked it over, studying the object intently. "Before we continue, I just wanted to give you all a little tribute for carrying on so freaking long."

She extended her claws and lunged for the hedge, swinging and slashing in a flurry of foliage.

SHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHING

In a matter of seconds, she was done, stepping away to reveal a perfectly-sculpted topiary in the likeness of Delilah boldly pointing. "Nya-daaaaah! What do you think, Ms. Ninja Lawyer? Did I get your good side?"

Delilah paused. "...Okay, not gonna lie, that's actually pretty co—"

SHING

The topiary's head fell off.

"Eeeeeeep!" Delilah's paws shot to her throat.

Ria leaned onto the witness stand, her chin in her right paw while she juggled Delilah's severed topiary head with her left. "Let me set the record straight. You have nothing on me. A fishy faux pas? A supposed weapon that no longer exists? Your theory needs pruning, Ms. Ninja Lawyer. I'll have you know it wasn't even possible for me to pull this off."

(And here we go with the gardening puns.) "How do you figure?" Delilah challenged. "You had access to all the tools you'd need to kill Lord Tigre and enter his study."

Nya ah ah!

"But you see, the tools were exactly why I couldn't have done it." Ria twirled the topiary head on one claw, teeth glinting through the folds of her mask. "I'd like to testify again, Your Honor."

"Do anything other than that and I'll accept," Loggins replied, shuddering.

She returned to her previous position. "Alrighty then. Allow me to shred the defense's claims into compost!"

Witness
Testimony

~ Your Ass Is Grass ~

"This may be news to you, but the Rainforest District is known for having a lotta rain."

"It was rainy that day too, and that means my gardening gear got covered in mud."

"So yeah, maybe I could've gotten through the thorns…"

"...but I would've made a huge mess of the study if I actually went inside!"

"And obviously, I couldn't have done it without the gear."

"The thorns would've made that totally impossible."

"So there's no way I was in that room! Tough luck, Ms. Ninja Lawyer!"

"She makes a good point…" Eric whispered. "But surely there must be some explanation."

Delilah nodded. "If that shifty scarecrow really is the killer, then she did it somehow. We just gotta prove it."

Kyle seemed mildly troubled as well. He was staring at Ria over the rim of his glasses. But he quickly hid it with a smile when he saw Delilah looking.

(At least he's finally starting to take this seriously.)

Cross
Examination

~ Your Ass Is Grass ~

"This may be news to you, but the Rainforest District is known for having a lotta rain."

"It was rainy that day too, and that means my gardening gear got covered in mud."

"So yeah, maybe I could've gotten through the thorns…"

"...but I would've made a huge mess of the study if I actually went inside!"

Hold it!

"You could've cleaned up after yourself," Delilah pointed out.

Nya ah ah!

Ria wagged a claw, bouncing Delilah's topiary head on her tail. "What, you think I brought a bunch of rags and wood polish with me? The desk was covered in Lord Tigre's termination papers. I'd have definitely dirtied them if I tried crawling in! Not to mention the carpet."

"I can concur that there were no signs of dirt or mud being tracked anywhere in the room," Kyle added. "A statement which I'm sure the defense can also verify, assuming they did a half-decent job of looking around."

(Well maybe we didn't, so there!) Which Delilah thankfully did not say out loud this time. "…We can."

"Now was that so hard?" Kyle asked cheekily, looking back to Ria. "Please continue, witness."

"And obviously, I couldn't have done it without the gear."

"The thorns would've made that totally impossible."

Hold it!

"We already know there are ways you could've gotten around the thorns," Delilah asserted.

"Nyahuh. But not ones I could've used," Ria countered, now kicking the head around like a hacky sack.

"Ms. Nepeta's pawprints were not found anywhere on the drainpipe," Kyle reminded her. "Not that we'd be able to find them at this point even if they were thanks to someone's evidence tampering…"

Delilah chose to ignore that. "But if she were wearing her gear, she wouldn't have left any prints!"

"Then we run into the same problem, as that also would've left dirt stains, which were not found. Any other wild theories you'd like to share?"

She knew he was baiting her, but… "A tarp! I'm sure she has one in her shed. If she laid that down in front of the thorns, she could leap clear over them without needing her gear. She's a cat, don't tell me she couldn't!"

"I won't," Kyle replied, adjusting his glasses. "But I will point out that she would have landed clear on top of Lord Tigre's desk if she did that, which most certainly would have left evidence."

"Or just broken it," Ria said, shrugging. "For a rich guy, he was remarkably cheap."

Delilah just glared.

"No, keep going!" the cat cackled. "I could fertilize the whole yard with the amount of shit you're spewing!"

(I can't just keep tossing out ideas like this and hoping something sticks. Still, I wonder if that tarp theory isn't totally off-base…)

"So there's no way I was in that room! Tough luck, Ms. Ninja Lawyer."

Delilah growled in frustration.

"Calm down." Eric put a paw on her shoulder.

"But there are just no cracks in her testimony!" Delilah hissed back.

"Maybe we should look at this from a different angle," Eric suggested. "Instead of combing over the Court Record, let's do what Ms. Sang did, and think about how we'd do it in her place. We were in that suit ourselves, remember? We're in a unique position to answer that question."

Delilah closed her eyes, thinking back. Surely there had to be some clue.

Then her eyes snapped open. "Ms. Nepeta! Could you repeat that testimony one more time, please?"

Ria's shoulders shook with laughter. "Whatever you say."

"This may be news to you, but the Rainforest District is known for having a lotta rain."

"It was rainy that day too, and that means my gardening gear got covered in mud."

"So yeah, maybe I could've gotten through the thorns…"

"...but I would've made a huge mess of the study if I actually went inside!"

"And obviously, I couldn't have done it without the gear."

"The thorns would've made that totally impossible."

Objection!

Delilah crossed her arms. "Impossible, huh? Not so much. To take a page from your playbook, the thorns are exactly what allowed you to pull it off."

"Nyawha?" Her clawed fists tightened. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"You shouldn't have lent us your spare gardening suit. Then we wouldn't have realized just how thick those thorns were. Thick enough to lay out our map of the manor over top of them. And when we climbed up to the bathroom, they were able to hold up the suit as well."

"If it's comparable to how much you've held up this trial, that would be impressive," Kyle snarked. "Get to the point."

"If Ms. Nepeta wanted to enter the study without dirtying it up, she had the perfect means to do so," Delilah explained. "First, she uses her suit to get through the thorns. Then, she sits atop the windowsill and removes her jacket, laying it out over top of the thorns. Using that, she then removes the dirty parts of her outfit, namely her gloves and boots, and lays them on top of the jacket. Clean as a whistle, she enters the study without leaving a trace, does her thing, and then makes her escape, simply redonning her shed gear beforehand."

"Rrrrrrr…" Ria growled, her claws sheathing and unsheathing sporadically as sweat trickled down her mask.

"And that's how she did the deed!" Delilah finished, pointing at her. "Leave it to the gardener to know her way around plants!"

"CAW CAW!"

Ria looked up, seeing several crows circling her head before they all divebombed her face, clawing and screeching. "NYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" She staggered back and tripped over the topiary, taking it down with her.

(Heh. Even plant me knows how to beat a perp.)

The courtroom erupted.

"Maybe this one actually knows her stuff after all," Classy Jaguar mused.

"Her theories are way out there, but I can't deny that could happen," Otterly Adorable admitted.

Grumpy Yeen shrugged. "Honestly, I've seen crazier. This isn't even in my Top 10."

"Order! Order!" Loggins shouted. "We seriously don't have time for this to happen after every insane theory!"

"Ms. Nepeta!" Delilah called again. "I think it's time you came—!"

Objection!

Kyle opened his mouth to speak, then reached for his glasses instead, pulling them off to wipe clean.

Delilah wasn't sure how to react. "Um… Is there a problem?"

He raised a finger to signal her to wait, then finished with his glasses, putting them back on. "Defense," he said patiently. "I'm really happy for you and imma let you finish, but are you entirely certain you realize what it is that you're asserting?"

"Wha—?" Delilah slammed the desk. "Of course I do! I'm the one asserting it!"

"Right, right. But for the benefit of the court, allow me to summarize." He cleared his throat. "What you're asserting is a means by which our straw-headed witness could have safely entered and exited Lord Tigre's study, all without leaving ANY evidence behind. Does that about cover it?"

"Yes! That's exactly... what I... shit."

"Nya ha ha HA!" Ria had hoisted herself back up to the witness stand, grinning through her mask wide enough to show gleaming fangs. "Like I said before, you've got nothing! You may think you're a blossoming attorney, but I say you'll be ever-green!"

She once again vanished from the stand, returning seconds later with another hedge on a cart. "I have a new muse. Inspiration is striking!"

SHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHING

When she was done this time, her topiary art depicted Kyle, leaning on a grassy cane and pointing a foliage finger back at the defense.

"Hmm. Not bad," Kyle said.

(Please. You're not even canine and I can see your tail wagging.)

"The prosecution… um, the flesh and blood one, raises a good point," Loggins said. "Your theory, by your own words, is unprovable."

"Er…" (Would it be hard to believe that I didn't think that far ahead? At this point, probably not.)

"So, despite the witness's rather unnerving demeanor…" Loggins continued.

"Nya ha ha. Nyaaa ha ha ha ha."

"…I can't allow you to continue questioning her without solid evidence."

"And the defense obviously has nothing of the sort," Kyle chimed in. "As has been clear for a while now." Did he seem… disappointed?

No, she couldn't think about that right now. But he was right. If she'd had any real evidence against her, she would have presented it already.

"Think about this carefully, Delilah," Eric advised. "It may seem like we've been backed into a corner, and that's mainly because we've been backed into a corner, but we've only recently put Ms. Nepeta on the stand. Now that she's our prime suspect, perhaps it's worth looking over the Court Record again. Evidence that didn't make sense before might just fall into place."

Place.

The word echoed in Delilah's head. Her back stiffened, and her tail went ramrod straight.

Place. Fall into place.

Fireplace.

Objection!

"The defense is ready to present evidence!" she proclaimed, cocky grin firmly back in place.

"Oh good," Kyle replied. "Was worried you really were done there. I was just starting to have fun. Please give me more to shoot down."

"Not this time," Delilah said with a chuckle. "Nyahahat this time."

"Hey!" Ria snapped. "You can't just go adding 'nya' to words like that! That's MY endearing character trait!"

"The defense will refrain from copyright infringement and present evidence!" Loggins ordered.

"Of course, Your Honor. There's still one piece of evidence we have yet to account for."

Take that!

"Prosecutor VanDal, you've boasted about how well you looked over the crime scene. Does that mean you found this as well?" She held up a little plastic baggy, holding pieces of the burnt scraps they'd found in the fireplace.

"...I did," Kyle confirmed. "But I couldn't find any relevance those scraps bore to the case. Until now."

"Have you figured out what they are, Delilah?" Eric asked curiously.

"That's right. And I'm willing to bet the witness has as well."

"Nyawhaaaaaa?!" Ria's button eyes shot off in surprise, showing her real eyes wide underneath. "W-Where did you get those?!"

"Defense, please explain what it is you're holding there," Loggins requested. "Not all of us are blessed with such youthful eyesight."

Delilah smiled. "They're bandages, Your Honor. Exactly the kind the house gardener would use to wrap up cuts from those thorn bushes. And I have reason to believe she was carrying them that day as well. She practically told us as much herself."

"Riiiiiight…" Delilah said, backing away. "We better get to it then. We'll let you know if we need anything else."

"Sure thing. And hey, if that thing you need is bandages, don't worry." Ria popped a roll out of her pocket and twirled it on a finger with a grin. "I always carry these on me just in case."

"This evidence never came up during the first day of the trial," Delilah explained. "Ms. Nepeta must have assumed her bandages were all burnt up. Otherwise, I bet she wouldn't have so carelessly admitted that she always carries them around."

"NYAGAAAAAAAAAH!" Ria reeled, claws scraping against the witness stand.

Burnt Scraps updated in the Court Record

"T-That doesn't prove anything!" the cheetah insisted. "You think I'm the only one with basic first-aid knowledge?! Those could belong to anyone!"

"She is correct," Kyle pointed out, somewhat begrudgingly. "What say you, defense? Can you tie that evidence to this witness specifically?"

"Of course she can't!" Ria taunted. "It's not as if I sign my bandages, you know!"

(Come on! How am I supposed to prove THAT?!)

"Calm down, Delilah," Eric said firmly. "I know you're on the right track. Remember what we were taught back in university. This may be one of those 'turn your thinking around' moments we learned about."

(Turn my thinking around? Hmmm. So instead of trying to prove that those bandages belong to Ria, I should be focusing on… why they were there in the first place?) "I think I get what you mean. Thanks, Rick!"

He gave her a slight bow. "It is my pleasure."

(Okay, so let's figure that out then. Ria obviously tried to destroy those bandages in the fireplace, or else she wouldn't be so freaked about us finding them. But as she says, we can't prove they belong to her anyway. So what could those bandages really mean?)

- They were taken.

- They were dropped.

- They were used.

Delilah slammed her palm on the bench. "The defense believes we have the evidence to prove that Ms. Nepeta used those bandages at the crime scene!"

Ria tilted her head. "Nyahuh. Sure you do."

"I wouldn't be a cocky kitty if I were you," Delilah warned, looking quite cocky herself. "Why would someone want to burn bandages? The only reason I can think of would be to hide the fact that they were used."

"Are you suggesting the killer was injured then?" Kyle asked. "But you just made such a big deal about how they got through the thorns unscathed."

"It's not the thorns I'm looking at," she clarified. Just like that, all the pieces were starting to fall into place. "I believe the witness may have cut herself on this."

Take that!

"A statuette?" Kyle said in confusion.

"A bronze figurine to be precise," she replied, taking no small amount of pleasure out of getting to correct him. "Lord Tigre kept this on his desk, including on the day of the murder. Now, please draw your attention to the rather sharp-looking sword that's part of its design."

"So this is the source of the witness's supposed injury?" Kyle asked skeptically.

"That it is. Remember, according to my theory, Ms. Nepeta was no longer wearing her protective gear by the time she entered the room. Let's say she were to reach inside with her ungloved paw, and accidentally grab onto that tiny sword…"

"I would say that such a thing would be evident just by looking at it," Kyle countered, finger gun loaded. "But as you can plainly see, there's no evidence of blood anywhere."

"Naturally. The bandages served a two-fold purpose," Delilah explained. "After all, if they were needed to wrap an injury, how would they end up in the fire? So one set was used to cover the wound, and the other to wipe the blood off the figurine. What we found is what's left of that plan!"

"Waaaaaaagh!" Kyle's latest backfire had him fuming, both at her and his own witness.

Nya ah ah!

"Not so fast! That all sounds well and good, but it's not like you actually found any blood on those bandages, didja?" Ria asked smugly. "If you had, you'd have already said so. Don't go planting seeds if you don't know what they'll grow into."

"Not yet, but we'll see what a little closer examination can tell us!" Delilah pressed. "Why don't you take off your gloves and show us your paws if you've really got nothing to hide!"

"Well, witness?" Loggins asked. "Can you show us?"

But Delilah could immediately tell something was wrong. Ria had grown less nervous. She was almost cocky now. "Nya ha ha. If you insist, Your Honor."

The cheetah reached up and casually flung off both of her gardening gloves, turning her palms forward to display all eight digits.

And absolutely nothing else. "I keep 'em well-groomed, don't I? I can even do jazz hands if you like."

Kyle laughed. "Well, it doesn't seem like the witness is going to give you a hand with your case."

But Delilah wasn't done just yet. "Take off your boots too."

Ria balked. "Excuse me?!"

"That's just inappropriate!" Kyle argued.

"Ms. O'Possum! This is a courtroom, not a strip club!" Loggins agreed.

"Mommy, what's a strip club?" asked a child in the gallery.

But Delilah shook her head. "I can assure you, I know the difference. Ya see, our client pointed something out to us earlier. That figurine wasn't facing the way it usually did after the murder. It must've been knocked over and hastily put back the wrong way. And now I think I know why."

- The killer knocked it over.

- The victim knocked it over.

- Monty knocked it over.

"I think the victim knocked it over in his death throes," Delilah continued. "If that was the case, it'd be on the floor, blade up, where someone climbing in through the window couldn't possibly see it. But they could certainly step on it. So, I repeat…" Delilah gave her most dramatic point yet. "Take. Off. Your. Boots."

"D-Delilah! You don't have to be so aggressive about it," Eric said, blushing slightly.

Ria wasn't smug anymore, glaring as viciously as she could through her refastened button eyes. "Rrrrrrr. Have it your way, you sicko."

With zero flair this time, she yanked off her right boot and propped her bare foot up on the witness stand. The bloodied bandages wrapped around it were clearly visible.

"Yikes!" Biker Wolf winced. "That's worse than walkin' across hot coals… filled with LEGOs!"

"It's accidents like this that make me wonder if our society should be more open to proper footwear," Otterly Adorable mused.

"Bah! Shoes are a conspiracy against nature!" Camo Dog scoffed. "First they cover our soles, then they cover our souls!"

Delilah wisely decided not to get involved in this debate. "How were you even running around on that?"

"You'd be amazed at how little pain you feel once you're doped up enough," Ria replied. "It's the only way I got through the days at that place."

"That aside…" She regained her focus. "It looks like you can't deny it anymore. Your injury is as clear as day!"

"So it is. But I need to clarify something." She grinned. "You see, it's true that I did injure my foot…"

Delilah instantly knew where this was going. "Noooo…"

"…but you can't prove…"

"Nooooooooo…"

"…that it has anything to do with the murder!"

"NooooGODDAMIT!" Delilah slammed both paws hard enough to shake the bench. "You can't be serious!"

"I'm afraid so!" Her toes gave a taunting wiggle before she shoved her boot back on. "And you have no way of saying otherwise! Nya ha ha ha!"

"That is the most BULLSHIT—!"

Objection!

"This line of questioning is getting tiresome." Kyle looked more annoyed than anything. "If you want to prove your case so badly, why don't we just do a luminol test on the figurine? That will make it clear if your story holds merit."

"Nya ha ha HUH?!" Ria turned to glare at him. "What do you think you're doing, prosecutor?!"

"Ms. Nepeta, my patience is limited," Kyle warned. "See, I don't like to wait for the fun parts of the trial, and I don't want to argue over a test I know damn well is perfectly valid. If you want me to argue something that's good for you, make it fun for me."

Ria growled. "You...! You...! Four-eyed, knock-kneed, conniving—"

"—Lazy, sadistic, two-faced, limping trash panda with no fashion sense. Blah blah blah. I've heard it all before. Where's MacTalon? She should be able to get the test done in a few minutes."

A panther police officer near the door coughed uncomfortably. "Uh... Detective MacTalon left, sir. She said she's cashing in on her paid time off for a few days because, and I'm quoting her here, 'I'm not that smart-mouthed little maggot's butler, and I'm sick of seeing him make an ass of himself.' She says she'll see you later."

Kyle pinched the bridge of his nose. "Well. That's annoying. Can someone please perform the luminol test on the figurine?"

Loggins nodded, banging her gavel. "I'll allow a brief recess while it is tested."

"That's it! You've just lost your artistic value, mister!" Ria snarled.

SHING

With one swipe of her claws, the cane of Kyle's topiary statue was cut out from under it, causing the whole thing to collapse on itself. Kyle feigned detachment.

(Now if only the real one could be toppled that easily.)

---

12:36 PM

Lower Canopy Upper Courthouse - Courtroom No. 4

When the test came back, Eric and Delilah were waiting in anticipation, Kyle was tapping his cane impatiently, Ria was still seething silently over his topiary's grassy remains, and everyone else was just bored.

But at last, the panther officer, in lieu of the AWOL detective, made his announcement. "Um, we've received the results of the luminol test. We can confirm that traces of blood were indeed found on the figurine's blade, left around the time of the murder."

Ria reacted to that about as well as expected. "Hissssssssssss!"

"And with that, we have a clear image of what happened," Delilah explained. "Ms. Nepeta accidentally cut her foot on the fallen figurine. She used one set of bandages to wrap the injury and another to wipe the blade, then threw that second set into the fireplace. Afterwards, she rearranged the crime scene as originally intended, and put the figurine back on the desk to hide what happened to her. But in her haste, she put it back the wrong way, facing towards her. Why? Because that's the way she's used to seeing it, from the outside!"

"CAW CAW CA-CAW!"

Delilah wrapped up her summation just in time to watch Ria once again eat crow. "NYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"

Bronze Figurine updated in the Court Record

"So how about it, Ms. Nepeta?" Delilah challenged. "Are you gonna admit that the blood belongs to you? Or do we hafta find that out the hard way?" She certainly looked ready to stick her with something, not necessarily a needle.

The crows flew off, leaving Ria panting on the witness stand. She just glared for a moment, her claws digging into the wooden surface and making an unpleasant scraping sound.

But then a smile came over her stitched-on face. "Nya ha ha. Nya ha ha ha ha ha. Nyaaaahahahahahahahahahahahaha!"

(Is that the psychotic laughter of a defeated culprit, or one who still has a trick up their sleeve?)

"Alrighty then. Since you asked so nicely, I'll admit it," Ria said, flashing her claws. "That blood is mine. And I'll even tell you exactly how it got there."

(Trick. Definitely trick.)

"I did go into Lord Tigre's study," Ria admitted. "But I did it before he ever died."

Objection!

"Bullshit!"

Loggins gave her a withering glare. "Watch your mouth, defense."

"Anyway," Ria continued, giving Delilah a sinister smirk. "I overheard him crowing about firing us through the window. Naturally, I was pretty peeved. So I figured I'd do something to stick it to him. I decided to break into his study to try and steal that fancy fountain pen of his. You guessed exactly how I did it too. Honestly, I'm a little impressed. Buuuut other than that, you were all wrong. Lord Tigre wasn't even in there, so no way I killed him."

Delilah stewed silently. "Then what about the bronze figurine?"

"I knocked that over myself," Ria explained. "Tripped trying to catch it and stomped on it. At that point, I figured the mission was a bust. So I patched myself up, cleaned up the mess so nobody would know I was there, and then ditched."

Kyle frowned. "In summary, you are confessing to breaking and entering, attempted larceny, and criminal clumsiness, but not murder. Is that correct?"

"That's right!" Ria replied. "I didn't wanna confess to any of that, of course, but I can't have Ms. Ninja Lawyer barking up the wrong tree. I watch over them too."

"I find that phrase offensive!" Biker Wolf yelled.

"As do I, fellow canine!" Camo Dog agreed.

(She's so obviously making this up on the spot, but she's doing it in a way that I can't disprove it!)

"Don't feel too down, Ms. Ninja Lawyer," Ria said. "You certainly gave us a good show. Your friend behind bars would be proud."

After a long moment, Loggins gave a sigh. "...If the defense has nothing further, I'm afraid we are at a loss. The case against Ms. Nepeta is not conclusive, nor can we simply dismiss it under these suspicious circumstances. I'll have to postpone the trial one more day for further investigation."

This brought about an immediate chorus of groaning from the jury and gallery alike.

"..." Ria's smug look had vanished as she glowered at the judge.

(I guess she doesn't want that either. Do we really have to put up with another day of this?)

Loggins raised her gavel. "For the time being, I declare this court adj—"

Hold it!

Ria slammed a gloved paw on the witness stand. "Yeah, no. I can't let that slide."

"Be that as it may, it's not up to you, witness," Loggins countered. She didn't look happy about ending the trial, but she liked being interrupted even less. "We simply lack the decisive evidence to reach a conclusion at this time."

"Well, if it's 'decisive evidence' that you're looking for…" Ria grinned, fangs shining through her mask. "I've got some right here."

Delilah was hurriedly trying to come up with something, but that derailed her train of thought before it could find a station. "You have WHAAAAAAT?!"

The gallery agreed with the sentiment, erupting with the sounds of many more crashed thought trains.

"Order! Ordeeer!" Loggins sat up straight. "Ms. Nepeta! You have evidence to present?"

"Hey now, don't act so surprised," she said. "I am the gardener, you know. It's only natural that I stumble upon some interesting findings every now and then. But be warned: this one is a doozy!"

Ria reached into her pocket, pulling out a single photograph and holding it up for all to see.

The picture was... rather grim.

It seemed to have been taken from the gardening shed and was facing Lord Tigre's window. The tiger himself was clearly visible, slumped dead at his desk.

But he wasn't alone. Lara Tigre hung from the drainpipe, peering into the room. Her face wasn't visible, but her paw was. It held a small, but sharp knitting needle.

Lady Tigre gasped. "T-That's mine. Lara, what have you…?"

Hold it!

"H-How did you get that?!" Lara snapped. The tigress looked even paler than usual.

"Nya ha ha ha!" Ria cackled. "Surprised? I guess you would be. See, your daddy suspected you were sneaking out long before he had confirmation. So he had me put up a trail cam, hidden under the roof of my shed. It's motion activated, to see if he could catch you in the act. I bet he never thought he'd catch his own murder on it though!"

(In other words, you didn't 'stumble upon' it at all. What is going on anymore…?)

Unacceptable!

Kyle's cane slamming into the bench created a loud enough bang to get even the judge's attention. "Witness! This photograph was not approved by the ZPD! It is illegal evidence!"

"I'm afraid the prosecution is correct," Loggins agreed. "I'm sorry, but the court cannot accept this into evidence."

Ria looked down. "Aww, really? That's a shame. I guess we'll just have to disregard it then…"

She shot back up with a grin. "NYAT! This is a jury trial, remember? You think the general public gives a damn if the evidence is legal or not?! Just take a look!"

Indeed, as if that whole exchange hadn't even happened, the members of the jury were actively talking amongst each other, practically tuning out the rest of the courtroom.

"I've already planted the seeds of doubt in their minds," Ria continued, tapping her head with a claw. "And soon those seeds are going to sprout."

"What are you getting at, witness?" Kyle demanded. "How does this even help you?"

"Oh, I'm not the one I'm trying to help. Consider this a consolation prize for the defense." Ria held up the photo again, waving it about almost tauntingly. "Notice anything unusual, Ms. Ninja Lawyer? Or perhaps a lack of something? You've spent so long trying to pin this on Lara that I'm surprised you're not jumping at the chance!"

As much as she hated to play along with this, Delilah looked closer, trying to ignore the obviously incriminating image of Lara to study the rest of the photo. Lord Tigre was definitely dead, in the same position he'd originally been found, meaning this had to have been taken after the murder. And yet, there was something missing. "The desk is clean," she realized. "And that directly contradicts this piece of evidence."

She brought up her own photographic print, this one of the spilled ashtray and the footprints Monty had tracked through it. "Is this what you mean?"

"You got it!" Ria confirmed. "We know for a fact that Monty left those footprints after he visited the study. So their absence in this image of Lord Tigre's body can only mean that he was dead before Monty even entered the room."

Kyle hissed, his finger gun backfiring before he even had the chance to raise it. "No!"

"Nyahahahahaha! And just like that, I've decisively proven the defendant's innocence!" Ria taunted. "Look how easy that was! Maybe I should be a lawyer!"

She vanished for a moment, bringing in yet another hedge on a cart. Ria extended her claws and...

SHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHING

...created a topiary masterpiece of herself giving a dramatic finger point to the jury. "I call it… Nyakuten Saiban!"

(Fuckin' weeb.) "Fuckin' weeb."

"Maybe I am, but I'm the one with the talent." She mimicked the topiary's pose. "At this time, I'd like to ask the ladies and gentlemammals of the jury to remember their role. Monty Gosland is the one on trial here, not me. And now you have clear, irrefutable evidence of Monty's innocence. So... what are you all waiting for?"

The members of the jury were certainly paying attention now, muttering even more fervently amongst themselves.

"What is she doing?" Delilah wondered. "She wants Monty to be found innocent?"

"I think it's more that she doesn't care," Eric replied. "If the jury votes not guilty, the trial will end. Monty will be acquitted... but Ria will slip away. She's hoping to put an end to this before we can make anything stick, even if it means giving you the win."

(That's not a win! We'll be right back where we started! Monty getting off light while the truth gets buried!)

Hold it!

"Not yet!" Kyle growled. "You can't call an end to proceedings so prematurely. We have yet to even fully examine that photograph of yours."

"Well, I'd love to let ya, but I can't on account of it not being legal evidence and all." She gave a helpless shrug. "The jury is welcome to shift their opinions at any time. You can't stop them. But hey, if you're so proud of those magic bullets of yours, let's see 'em un-ring a bell!"

Kyle's lip curled into a snarl. "Damn you…"

"Your Honor!" Classy Jaguar announced. "I think we've all seen enough. And I've had enough of this case for a lifetime. Not guilty." He slammed his fist on the lever.

Loggins sighed. "As is your right."

"Even the judge can't do anything?" Delilah hissed.

"She could potentially declare a mistrial," Eric pointed out. "But even that would just be giving Ms. Nepeta what she wants. Perhaps Her Honor realizes as much."

"Gah!" Delilah leaned across the counter. "Hey, Kyle! Don't you have anything else to pull outta your ass?! C'mon, you're a pro at that!"

"Regrettably, Ms. O'Possum, I seem to be all out of ammo," he admitted, resigned. "That cat blindsided all of us. I never could've seen something like this coming."

"It's been a long trial," said Otterly Adorable. "I'm... honestly still not sure what happened. But I'm content that it wasn't that nice butler. Not guilty."

"That's right," Ria chuckled darkly. "Keep it coming…"

(It can't end like this! I have to stop her somehow!)

Illegal evidence or no, she wasn't done examining that photo yet, even from memory.

Hidden Camera Photo illegally added to the Court Record

"CAAAAAAAAAW!"

"Not again!" Ria cried, covering her head with her paws.

But Lenore was the only one to swoop in, snatching the photo out of her grip and bringing it over to Lara, who promptly brought her lighter to it and burned it to ashes.

Ria rolled her button eyes. "Oh no. My only copy. How could you?"

(Guess memory is all I've got now. Ugh! If she had this the whole time, why did it take her so long to show it?!)

"I hate to say it, but this case seems to be wrapped up tighter than an oversized fish in an undersized net," Biker Wolf said. "And honestly, I need to get back to my bikes. Not guilty."

(Actually... Why DID it take her so long?)

Delilah wracked her brain. "She could've brought that photo out as soon as she was called to the stand. It would've proven Monty innocent right away if ending the trial was all she wanted, with much fewer consequences for herself. But she didn't present it until she had no other choice. Why is that?"

"Maybe it has something in it she didn't want anyone to see," Eric whispered back. "That would explain why she rushed the jury straight to a verdict before we could focus on it too much. But does it matter? It's gone now. And she would've deleted any other photos that would incriminate her."

"I guess spies really can be anyone." Camo Dog glared at Lara. "Shame on you, after all the nice things your ma said about you. Not guilty."

"Maybe the evidence is gone," Delilah said. "But her inflated ego ain't."

"The jury's decision seems to be unanimous," Loggins observed. "I suppose it's time to bring this case to a close…"

Hold it!

"Actually, Your Honor…" Delilah started. (I can't believe I'm about to say this.) "Ms. Nepeta's new evidence proves beyond a reasonable doubt that her testimony can be trusted. That means her failed little heist is testimony that hasn't yet been examined."

Objection!

"Nobody wants to be here any longer!" Ria protested. "Come on! Everyone voted not guilty! It's ov—!"

"Guilty."

Ria's head snapped towards the jury.

Grumpy Yeen had changed her vote at the last minute. "What? She's right. If you're so 'honest and trustworthy' you shouldn't mind going into more detail."

"You've got the prosecution on the ropes," Delilah said, giving Kyle a gentle shove under a metaphorical bus. "Plus, you've been accused for so long! Surely you want to clear up any doubts that you might be responsible!"

Ria visibly hesitated. "I, uh…"

"Come on," the possum urged. "You really want mammals muttering behind your back that you got away with murder? You just proved how blind the court of public opinion can be."

Ria growled a little. "I guess you're right. Fine then. I'll tell you about what happened while I was in the study."

Eric didn't seem entirely sure about this. "Delilah, what are you...?"

"Shh!" she said simply, putting her head down. "We did our best, Rick. It's time to let this play out."

And play out it would. In fact, Delilah had just the sort of 'play' in mind.

:) Playing Possum ):

Starring Ria Nepeta

As she focused, a large stage unfolded in her mind's eye, with curtains, props, an attentive audience, and most importantly, actors.

Delilah's role she chose for herself, pinned to the stage beneath the blades of a pair of giant gardening shears. She laid back, her hands clutching the blades, looking appropriately helpless as the defeated heroine.

Ria had chosen to play the role of the villain, whether she realized as much or not, and she stood before the limp possum in the form of an even more nightmarish scarecrow. Her elongated claws and fangs were bared threateningly, her eyes and teeth almost glowing through the holes in her mask. But she wasn't on the attack; not anymore. After all, she believed she had already won.

And that might just be the only angle Delilah had left.

Their backdrop was a window on Casa Tigre, peering into the dining room. The actors took their positions, the curtains opened wide, and their performance began.

The stage is set!

ACT I

Ria gave her first lines.

"I was in the [garden] during the incident at [breakfast]."

"But I heard the whole thing through the [window]."

"[Lord Tigre] sounded furious, especially when he gave his [announcement]."

"And boy, did his [family] let him have it!"

(She isn't giving me what I need just yet. It's her actions at the crime scene that she's trying to hide. But I see a few points I can press her on. To get this story where I need it to go, where should I start?)

Scene!

"You mean the [announcement] about the firings, right?" Delilah asked weakly. "That's what set you off."

ScarecRia gave a triumphant cackle.

"You bet! When I heard that, I was downright [offended]! I was so mad, I had to get back at him somehow!"

"I watched [Lara] and [Lady Tigre] scream. They were just as pissed!"

"While they were all distracted, I decided to steal Lord Tigre's [fountain pen], which I knew he kept in his [study]."

Scene!

"So that's when you made your plan to get into the [study]?" Delilah wailed in a defeated tone, casting a dramatic arm over her face.

(She's getting there. But I need to keep nudging her story in the right direction.)

The backdrop changed, sliding over to a different window, one that opened into the study.

ACT II

Oblivious to her internal scheming, the cheeterror continued.

"Yes, I used their [argument] to sneak around to the study."

"But I wasn't sure at first how to get in. I lurked [outside] for a little while, by the [windowsill]."

"You already know what the [problem] was. The [thorns] blocked my way, but my [gear] would leave marks."

Scene!

"So you came up with a solution, using the [windowsill]," Delilah sighed. "It was a clever plan, I gotta admit."

Now she was really getting into the evil bragging.

"Thank you! Honestly, I'm amazed I came up with it while [high]."

"I pushed my way through the [thorns], got up, and took off my [gear] to avoid tracking mud. Even if it was just a [pen] I knew [Lord Tigre] would do a lot worse than fire me if I got caught."

"As I turned my legs in, I knocked over the [figurine] and stepped off the [desk]."

Scene!

Delilah pretended to give a mighty heave against the shears pinning her, to no avail. "That was when you stepped on the [figurine]?"

The backdrop fell away completely, now bringing the scene into the room itself.

(I'm almost there. Just a little further…)

ACT III

"That damn figurine is where the whole [plan] fell apart."

"Yeah, I cut my [foot] on that thing. But at least I had my [bandages] along to help [clean up] the mess."

"After that though, I [aborted] the plan and made my [escape]."

Scene!

"What did the [clean up] involve exactly?" She tried not to sound too eager. "Just to clarify."

ScarecRia put a long, bony finger to her chin in thought.

"I wrapped my [foot], but there was quite a bit of [blood] left on the [figurine]."

"I had to wipe it up with the [bandages]. The whole time, I was scared I was gonna get [caught]."

Scene!

"Wiping the [blood] with just some bandages must have been so difficult!" Delilah clutched her chest, as if in the throes of death, reaching a desperate hand out to the audience. "You didn't miss a drop!"

She grinned, clearly just eating it up at this point.

"Of course, I had to be [careful] about it."

"I couldn't leave any [evidence] behind, so I tried to dispose of the [bandages] and avoid stepping in the [ashes]."

"But thanks to you, those [scraps] in the [fireplace] were discovered."

"So now you know the full story!"

Cut!

ScarecRia stiffened, the spotlight on her flickering off. "H-Huh?"

Delilah sat up, casually snapping the shears in half like the cheap stage prop they were. "That's funny. You never mentioned that you were the one who spilled those [ashes]." She dusted her hands, then pointed one finger at the suddenly much less menacing figure. "Now why would you try to hide that, Ms. Nepeta?!"

The flames in ScarecRia's eyes went out. Realizing what she'd let slip, the fearsome feline clutched her head and screamed. "NYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"

The audience burst into applause. Delilah sprang back to her feet, turning and bowing to the generous crowd as the curtains closed around her.

That's a wrap!

"Defense, I'm going to need you to stop bowing," Loggins said, snapping her out of her reverie.

Delilah blinked a few times, rubbing her eyes. "Oh. Right. Of course, Your Honor."

Spilled Ashtray updated in the Court Record

"And I'd also like you to explain what your little 'performance' just accomplished," she continued. "So the witness was the one who spilled the ashtray. Why does that matter? Is it not consistent with her story of breaking into the victim's study?"

"T-That's right!" Ria proclaimed, sweating fiercely as her claws popped in and out of their sheaths. "I knocked over the ashtray as well! Sorry I forgot to mention that before. Clumsy me."

"That's just it, Your Honor," Delilah replied. "It is consistent with her story. And with the photograph she showed earlier. Which raises the question of why she would fail to mention it. I can think of at least one good reason."

"I can think of two," Kyle offered. "The first is plausibility. Ms. Nepeta claims that she did all of this before Lord Tigre even entered his study. If that were the case, would he really fail to notice a huge pile of ashes on his very expensive carpet? Based on the lovely things we've heard about him so far, I'd think the whole house would be aware if he saw that. But he didn't. And neither did Mr. Urshine when he delivered the fish at noon."

"W-Wait! M-My mistake!" Ria stammered. "Maybe Lord Tigre did spill it when he died! Or Lara did when she stabbed him!"

"Or you did after you shot him!" Delilah countered. "Which brings us to the second reason you had to hide this from us. Why is it that those ashes came to mind when I asked you about the blood? You wrapped your injury and wiped the blade, but your blood ended up in one more place, didn't it? And that place was the carpet itself!"

"NYAAARGH!"

"It would be hard to explain spilled ashes on the carpet, but it would be even harder to explain that! You needed a way to hide that evidence, and fast. So you did what any good feline would and knocked something off the nearest surface to cover it up, that being the ashtray!"

"We were so focused on Mr. Gosland's trek through those ashes that the true meaning of this evidence was almost lost to us." Kyle shook his head. "It's all over now though. Thanks to that illegal photograph you were so proud of, we now know exactly what the order of events were. Lara Tigre visited the study before Mr. Gosland, and you were there before either of them. The ashtray could only have been spilled then, at the very moment of Lord Tigre's death."

"T-That still doesn't implicate me!" Ria insisted. "Who says Lara didn't do it?!"

Both Tigres were openly seething at her at this point. Lara had to physically restrain Lenore from avenging her honor, but only because Delilah wasn't yet finished.

"There's a very easy way we can find that out, you know," she said simply. "If you spilled those ashes to cover your blood, there's a good chance some of that blood is still mixed in with them. If we were to compare that blood sample to the one we got from the figurine, which you've already admitted is yours, do you think we'd find a match? If so, I'd say that would put this matter to bed once and for all."

Ria looked dazed, clutching her head as her button eyes went in circles. "Nnnngh…"

"It's been a long road to get here, but we're finally at the end. Ria Nepeta…"

Delilah pulled her arm back, her tail wrapping around it several times, before she pointed both at the feline.

"You've been caught black-handed and red-footed!"

"Nnnnnnnnngh… aaaaaaaah…" Ria staggered back, colliding with the topiary statue she'd made of herself. It shuddered from the impact, bits and pieces beginning to fall off, starting with her own pointer finger. "H-Hold on… It's not what you think… I-I can explain… I just gotta… pull myself together…"

She turned around, extending her claws and putting them to work on the deteriorating statue.

SHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHING

Ria pulled away, admiring her handiwork. "Voi-LAAAAAAAAH!"

Instead of repairing the topiary, her claws had sculpted it into an entirely different shape. Now it bore the likeness of Chef Humphrey, extending an arm and pointing an accusing hoof at her.

"W-What are you looking at?!" Ria lunged for it again. "I'll fix you good!"

SHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHING

The topiary took another shape, this time the much larger one of Sunny Urshine. His normally friendly face was twisted into a frown, he too pointing right at her.

"S-Stop it! STOP IT!" Ria let out a desperate scream, trying one last time.

SHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHINGSHING

"None of you have the right to judge me! You ALL wanted him dead! I DID YOU A FAVOR!"

Some part of her must have thought otherwise, because the topiary's final appearance was that of Lady Tigre herself, holding her fan with one arm, and pointing with the other.

"YAAAAAH!" Ria tripped over her own boots and fell to the floor in shock. But in her panic, she seemed to have made an error in the topiary's design. That pointing arm was just a bit too heavy, and it began to tip the whole thing over, falling directly towards her.

Ria tried to scramble away, but her back hit the witness stand. All she could do was stare up in horror as the matriarch's furious visage came crashing down on her. "No… please… LADY TIGREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

The resulting impact covered much of the floor, spreading leaves and foliage around the courtroom.

"CAAAAAAAAAAW!"

Lenore left Lara's shoulder, flying over to land atop the witness stand alongside several crows, all looking down at the remains.

A clawed glove burst through the pile of green, twitching for a moment, then fell limply to the side. "Mrowr…"

"Bailiff, please extricate the witness," Loggins ordered.

The anteater bailiff sighed, pulling the cord on an industrial-strength leaf blower.

Once he was finished, Ria Nepeta was left slumped over the stand, covered in stray foliage and clutching what was left of her mask. The cheetah's now exposed face looked utterly defeated. "Looks like you finally got me. Guess you really are Ms. Ninja Lawyer…"

"Enough with the dumb nicknames," Delilah snapped. "Do you confess?"

She sighed. "Yeah. I killed Lord Tigre. I'd say I would do it again, but if I'd known how many others were gunning for him, I would've just gotten wasted until the deed was done."

"So you had the same motive as everyone else then?" Kyle asked. "You wanted to kill him to save your jobs? Or perhaps for Lara and Humphrey?"

Ria shook her head. "No. I'm afraid my motive was much more personal."

"What was it?" Delilah pressed.

"...I suppose there's no point trying to bury anything else." The cat's eyes were firmly affixed to the floor. "Lara and Humphrey weren't the only ones in a secret relationship. I was involved in one too... with Lord Tigre."

The silence was palpable.

Lady Tigre finally broke it, with an anguished, "You what...?"

Ria gave another sigh. "Yeah. Ever since he saved me from that damn ostrich. Why do you think he was so eager to help?"

Lara was so furious that now Lady Tigre had to cling to her arm to hold her back. Lenore desperately flapped, clinging to her tail to try and help. "You two-faced bitch!" An insult far more offensive to the feline persuasion.

"I always saw him as kind of a shining hero," Ria admitted. "I really thought we had something, but, well…"

"What do you mean you're firing ME too?!"

Lord Tigre stood at the window of his study, his hawk-like eyes staring at the gardener outside like she was little more than compost. "I'm sorry, Ria, but I still have an image to uphold. I can't let my family be shamed. Not by that peddling chef, and certainly not by you."

"You... Is that what this is about? Your fragile ego can't handle being with me, so you lash out at everyone else?!"

"You give yourself far too much credit. I took you in because you were young and fit. But you're in your thirties now, and you have a serious drug problem. It won't be hard to replace you."

"I-I'll tell everyone about us! I won't let you live this down!"

"You think anyone will believe you? After today, I'm wiping this slate clean. Go pack your bags. You're done here."

"...! DOMINIC!"

"But I was right, wasn't I?" Ria asked bitterly. "He didn't live it down. I made sure of that."

"So you're the one Lord Tigre was arguing with at the window," Delilah realized. But that wasn't the only connection she made. She recalled what Ria had told them back in the gardening shed.

"Don't get me wrong, the solitude's nice too," Ria clarified, staring wistfully up at the ceiling. "Monty… Humphrey… Sunny… they all hafta work inside, seeing the worst of Lord Tigre. I just gotta tend to the plants. And the plants don't yell at me, or judge me, or tell me I suck at my job. I just make 'em happy, and they make me happy too. It's crazy, right? You see all these supplies I gotta use, but plants are still way less needy than people. No amount of water and sunshine can restore a dead relationship."

(So that was what she meant...)

"You got pretty much everything right about the murder part," Ria said to Delilah. "Monty didn't know where he left his lapel pin, right? I found it on the windowsill."

She facepalmed. "Of course you did…"

"He must've left it there before the whole fiasco at breakfast. I figured I'd just give it back to him later. But when Dominic dumped me I... I just saw red! It was the only thing I had on me, and the shape reminded me a little of a dart. When Dominic threw the fish out the window, it was like fate itself was giving me a sign. I knew how to make a blowgun from my days as a wilderness guide, and I knew that I had the perfect poison to dose it with. Didn't have any bamboo or reeds, so I improvised with a bong. Just had to cut off the end a bit, cover the holes, and boom."

(Wait, so I was actually right about that?)

Ria gave a little smile. "He actually had the gall to look hurt when I shot him. For the few seconds it took for the toxin to do its job. But he fell back onto the floor, forcing me to climb in after him to arrange the crime scene. That's where everything went wrong. I injured myself, leaving evidence of my own blood behind, which I covered up the only way I could. I thought I was screwed at first, but I went through with my plan anyway. There was no going back at that point. I still made one more blunder though. I was going to destroy that chunk of fish I cut off, but it was no longer in my pocket. It must've slipped out while I was climbing over the thorns."

The cheetah shook her head. "Still, you can imagine my surprise when I caught Lara on my hidden camera, and then Monty soon after, incriminating himself even better than I intended. I couldn't believe my luck." She growled. "But then YOU showed up, throwing everything into chaos like a damn gremlin."

Delilah grinned playfully. "It's what I do."

"I didn't think much of you at the time. Not until the first trial, when you found the fish I buried. I didn't show it, but I was terrified you'd eventually uncover the much more damning evidence I was hiding. I had to get rid of it for good. But I was afraid I'd get caught trying to destroy it myself, so I got the idea to have someone else do it for me…"

"I can't believe those lousy lawyers." Lara Tigre swayed on the spot, barely holding on to the lit bong between her fingers. She crossed her legs to stabilize herself, sitting across the floor of the shed from Ria, who was much more adapted to the stuff.

"Hey, don't worry, Lara dude. I totally get it," the cheetah assured. "They came in and just screwed you both over. I feel for ya. You and Elly."

"I still need to get down to the detention center and see him," Lara said, looking a bit guilty that she wasn't there already. "I just really needed something to clear my head first. Thanks for that, Ria."

"No problem. I gotcha covered. But you know, even when those lawyer dudes are gone, Lord Tigre's memory is always gonna be around. That must be hard to deal with. I mean, the room where he died is right below you."

Lara pinched her bong just a bit harder. "Yeah, well, I can't exactly do anything about THAT, now can I?"

"Yeah, I guess not. If only you could smoke away that memory as easily as this nip, am I right?"

"Smoke away…" Lara paused, then suddenly stood up again, having to catch herself on the wall for balance. "Uh, I gotta get going. Thanks again, Ria." She hastily staggered out of the shed, closing the door behind her.

As soon as she did, Ria allowed herself a smirk. "Farewell, Dominic."

"Lara was an impulsive teenager with a penchant for the poetic." Ria gave a shrug. "Odds were good she'd take my words literally."

Lara looked genuinely hurt. Betrayed. "That talk of ours actually helped me feel better…"

Lady Tigre hugged her daughter reassuringly.

Ria just shrugged again. "I'd just murdered someone. My mind wasn't exactly on sparing your feelings." She looked back at the possum. "Anyway, I completely mucked up showing you my bong collection. I'd forgotten that I just put it back with the rest after I used it. Once I realized you might actually figure out what it was, I smashed the whole lot to bits with a sledgehammer, to make it look like I was just going clean. Sucks that I got caught anyway. Some of those were antiques."

"Nobody feels sorry for you!" Lara snapped.

"Oh fuck right off!" Ria snapped back. "I'm just as much a victim of Lord Tigre as the rest of you! The only difference is that I got to him first!"

Objection!

Delilah shook her head. "Now that ain't true."

"What are you talking about?"

"Monty and Humphrey did what they did to protect Lara and Lady Tigre from being alone with a monster," she explained. "Lara wanted to protect her soon-to-be hubby. Sunny just made a mistake, a faithful bodyguard to the end. And to Lady Tigre, every one of them is like family. Every member of this household has proven themselves loyal to someone else. But you? You did this because you got dumped, and no other reason. Then you tried to frame anyone you could just to cover your own ass. You didn't just put the car before the engine. You put the driver before 'em both, and you got run over cuz of it. Frankly Ria, you and that dickhead deserved each other."

Ria was silent for a long while. "...You might be right. Maybe I was the weed in this garden all along. Guess I'll have plenty of time to think about that now."

She reached into her jacket, making the bailiff tense up, before she pulled out a small bunch of leaves and crumpled them in her fist.

"Is that more catnip?" Loggins asked disapprovingly. "You better not be using that in my courtroom."

"Or what? You'll arrest me?" she scoffed. "I'm not getting any more of this where I'm going. Might as well make it last." She brought it up to her nose, and snorted it.

Ria closed her eyes, the leaves falling from her grip and onto the floor. She let out a bitter chuckle. "Heh. I feel... nothing."

She was taken away, and Monty was brought back to the stand. The mongoose looked after the cheetah in concern. (I guess he's used to being around a killer enough that he can show some empathy.)

"Mr. Gosland," Loggins said gravely. "I must make it clear that you are far from innocent in this case. Both you and Mr. Humphrey will be returning to court in the near future. Am I understood?"

Monty looked down at his feet, giving a small nod.

"However," Loggins continued. "This trial was for murder, not attempted murder. So, if Juror No. 5 would kindly rescind her spite vote, I'd like to hand down my verdict."

"Oh. Right." Grumpy Yeen hit her lever, making the jury unanimous at last.

"It's about time," Classy Jaguar said, shaking his head. "Though I hafta admit, maybe all that wasn't as much of a waste as I thought. Certainly wasn't boring, at least."

"Oh, I concur!" Otterly Adorable chimed in. "That trial was an absolute rollercoaster! My fur's still standing on end!"

"You want a rollercoaster, just wait for the ones we'll have at our new park," Biker Wolf said. "But there was a good lick of excitement involved, huh? Wonder if this could be a new attraction…"

"I would enjoy 'checking it out' fellow canine," Camo Dog agreed. "...Er, no. Nevermind. Too heavily exposed. But it was a nice thought."

"Nothing more to complain about here," Grumpy Yeen finished. "I can't fully trust Sang yet, but at least her trust is well-placed."

"I will definitely find more things to complain about," was all Hipstapir added.

"Right then." Loggins sat up straight. "Regarding the murder of Lord Dominic Tigre, the court hereby finds the defendant, Montgomery Gosland…"

NOT GUILTY

Confetti rained from the ceiling, to cheers that may have just been in Delilah's imagination, followed by an impressive display of fireworks that immediately threw Eric into a panic. "Are they trying to burn this place down?!"

Loggins banged her gavel. "The follow-up trial will be arranged at some point in the future. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going home to nurse a migraine with some birch and a hot bath before someone makes me preside over it. Court is adjourned."

The jury began to file out, followed by the members of the gallery.

"Yes! We did it, Rick!" Delilah cheered, pulling the badger into a hug.

"Oof! Don't be so humble. You're the one who came through in the end," Eric replied.

"Indeed," Kyle said from across the room. "I must say, you certainly surprised me, Ms. O'Possum. It's been a while since I've lost a case that I actually sort of cared about. I look forward to doing battle with you two in the future. Especially you, Mr. Badge." He leaned on his cane, pointing one last finger gun at the duo. "But next time, you better expect me to come fully loaded. Then you'll learn the folly of bringing your fists to a gun fi—"

SNAP

"WAAAAAH!" The cane snapped, sending the raccoon flailing unceremoniously to the floor. His only mercy was that barely anyone was still left to see it.

(Must have broke under the weight of his ego.) "I think that's our cue to leave, Rick."

"Yes. We best."

The two lawyers departed as well, leaving the courtroom completely deserted.

Well, almost completely. "...Hello?" Kyle called out. "Is anyone going to help me up?"

---

1:18 PM

Lower Canopy Upper Courthouse - Defendant Lobby No. 3

"It's finally over!" Delilah flopped onto the wooden floor in relief, splinters be damned. "Goddamn Rick, you had it so much easier with Millie."

"I must admit, that trial almost felt like a tutorial compared to what you've been through," the badger conceded. "Which only makes your victory all the greater."

"Wooo! Dogpile!" Millie shouted, throwing herself atop the possum instead of him for once. Eric felt it best not to join in.

"Yes, a fabulous job all around," Monty said with a nod. "It's about the best I could've asked for, given the circumstances. If Aunt Lucy could be here right now, I'm sure she'd be thankful too."

"She is," said a mildly sinister male voice.

The speaker was a black-furred vampire bat, a good few inches taller than Lucy. He was dressed in an elegant black suit, and carried himself with a rather regal demeanor.

"Ah, my apologies for approaching so suddenly," he said with a deep chuckle. "Ms. Sang and I are friends. As she is currently indisposed, she asked me to deliver something to you."

From his coat, he dug out a rolled up envelope. Delilah hopped up and took it, then unrolled it. On the front was a cartoonish drawing of Lucy, with a speech bubble containing the words: "Lots and lots of moneeeeeey!" and little storm clouds in the background.

Delilah opened the envelope, and removed the check within. Instantly, her eyes bugged out. "H-Holy trashcans that's a lot!"

"And with it, she offers her thanks," the mysterious bat informed. "Ms. Sang is quite grateful, and says she'd love to work with you again in the future." He checked a pocket watch. "I'm afraid I must take my leave now. Good evening."

"Who was that?" Eric asked Monty as the bat departed.

Monty shrugged. "I haven't the foggiest. Aunt Lucy has many connections. No one of past or future import, I'm sure."

He only just left when Lady Tigre began to walk over, flanked by her daughter and bodyguard. The matriarch smiled down at Monty, not quite looking in the direction of the lawyers. "Congratulations, Monty. I'm very happy for you."

Lara was also looking away, but spared a quick glance at the mongoose. "Yeah, great to hear. Congrats."

"Thank you both," Monty replied, giving a small bow. "If I could, I would atone for my crimes by scrubbing every square inch of Casa Tigre until it sparkles. But the law has other plans for me, I'm afraid."

"I know," Lady Tigre said somberly, leaning down to rest a reassuring paw on his back. "Just remember that you'll always have a home with us once you get out. I took you in because I believed in your inherent goodness, Monty, and I still believe in you now."

"T-Thank you, Lady Tigre. I... excuse me." Monty pulled out his handkerchief, rubbing at his eyes. "Just a bit of stray dust. Don't mind me."

Even Lara smiled at that. The only one who didn't look happy at all was Sunny, who hadn't taken his eyes off the floor since they'd walked in.

"You okay, big guy?" Delilah asked in concern.

"Just... lost a lotta self confidence," he admitted. "Not only did I fail to protect Lord Tigre, but I couldn't protect his family from him. What kinda bodyguard am I?"

"Hey now!" Delilah chided, patting his tree-trunk leg. "Don't think about it like that. After all, you protected something pretty important in all this."

Take that!

"The ashes on the carpet?" Sunny asked, scratching his head.

"A key piece of evidence," Delilah reminded him. "If not for your quick thinking, those ashes would've been burned up, and Ria never would've been caught. So you protected the truth, which is pretty dang important, if ya ask me."

"I'm a protector... of the truth?" Sunny thought it over, slowly lifting his giant head. "Hey, maybe you're right. Maybe I can protect something after all." He pumped his fists. "Yes! I promise to be better! I won't let anything like this happen ever again!"

(With Lord Tigre gone, it probably won't, but I'll let him have his moment.)

"That reminds me," Lady Tigre said, her face dropping into a frown as she whirled around on her daughter. "Those damages are going to come out of your allowance, young lady. And you have some serious explaining to do."

Lara flinched, while Lenore shielded her eyes with a wing. "I-I already explained it, didn't I? I wanted to erase his memory, and I was tricked into it by Ria anyway, so—"

"That is NOT what I meant!" her mother snapped, closing her fan sharply in front of her face. "I want to know what you were doing in that photograph!"

Lara couldn't meet her eyes. "...I may or may not have had the same thoughts about taking care of him as everyone else. So I... I just grabbed the first sharp object I could find. It didn't even occur to me that the needle was yours. I just... I couldn't take it. I couldn't let him get away with doing things like this anymore. When I realized he was already dead, I... I felt... shock, I guess. I couldn't believe what I'd just been about to do. So I climbed back up and pretended it never happened. I'm sorry, Mom. I know you still cared about him, but…"

Seeing her daughter was on the verge of tears, Lady Tigre pulled her into a hug. "It's okay, sweetie. You were doing it for us. I understand."

(She really is forgiving.)

Lara just started openly bawling into her mother's shoulder, like a kitten.

Lady Tigre held her until she settled down, then pulled back a little. "I did pull some strings, to help cheer you up."

"H-Huh?"

The clip-clopping of hooves on wood instantly made her look up, seeing the warm smile of Chef Humphrey greeting her.

"Humpy!"

"Lala!"

(Those are still terrible names.)

But their reunion would not be held back by anything, even the lack of coordination from either party as they rushed forward and practically crashed into each other.

"He can only visit for a few minutes," Lady Tigre explained, smiling for them. "But I thought you'd appreciate it nonetheless."

It could have been a few seconds and they would've made the most of it, already holding each other tight and locking lips. Lara's foot even popped, a gesture that would've looked silly on her at any other time.

She sniffled, and then spoke.

"My sweet Ellias."

"I've waited so long for you."

"I can wait some more."

He responded in turn.

"We need no preservatives for this endeavor."

"True love has a shelf life of forever."

Delilah waited for a good chance to chime in, but seeing that it wasn't going to happen, she decided she couldn't stomach the poetry anymore. "Hey… so I wanted to say something, if that's okay."

Both heads turned to face her, a bit too happy to be pissed at the moment. The perfect time to capitalize on this.

"Look, I know I messed up in there, more than once. I'm the reason you two got split apart, and it didn't even really help my case at all. So I'd like to say I'm sorry." She took a deep breath. "And I'd like to make it up to you."

"How do you expect to do that?" Humphrey asked.

But Delilah stood up straight, and presented her badge. "I'd like to defend you and Monty in the follow-up trial! Then I can help get you both cleared for good!"

She was expecting them to be surprised, even angry, but she definitely hadn't expected looks of extreme discomfort.

"Um, wow," Lara said, scratching the back of her head.

"I appreciate the offer," Humphrey added, tapping his hoof fingers together. "It's just that…"

"Absolutely not."

Lady Tigre of all mammals was the one to step forward, her face stern. "I thank you for all that you've done for Monty, Ms. O'Possum. But he was not the only one your actions affected. I accept your apology, but I do not believe I'd like to work with you any further." She looked away. "I cannot bear to go through any of this again."

Delilah's ears fell. "But I didn't mean to… I just wanted to…" She looked to Lara and Humphrey. "You guys too?"

They both nodded silently. Even Lenore joined in.

"I'm sorry," Monty said. "Aunt Lucy has no more say in the matter. She cannot overrule my employer."

"It's probably for the best," Sunny admitted, trying his best to help her feel better. "You did say it was a relief for this to be over. I think Lady Tigre and the others just feel the same way."

"But it's not over!" she insisted. She looked between Eric and Millie, both just as stunned as she was. "There's going to be another trial! They still need a defense!"

"And they shall have one."

Delilah knew exactly who that was going to be before she even turned around. She did it just in time for Lila Lilac and Pierce Pierson to brush right past her, the latter holding out his paw to shake Lady Tigre's.

"Thank you for accepting our help, madam," the porcupine said politely. "We've gathered everything we need to begin preparing our case."

"Accepting your…" Delilah looked up at Lady Tigre, who had once again hidden her face behind her fan.

"As I said, I cannot go through this again. Soon after you left the house, I received a call from Tooth & Claw, offering their services."

"You had convinced Ms. Sang to take you back somehow," Pierson said, glancing back at her more than a little smugly. "But thanks to you, one Ellias Humphrey was suddenly in need of some good lawyers. Lawyers who can be far more decisive without getting anyone else in trouble."

"And now Mr. Gosland's fate rests in our paws as well, just as we intended from the start," Lilac added. "Funny how that all worked out."

(B-But I beat them fair and square! This shouldn't be…)

As if reading her mind, the skunk continued. "You may have won our little contest, but at the end of the day, it is our clients who decide whether or not to accept our help. And unfortunately for you, it seems you've burned a few too many bridges to make this final crossing."

Pierson was already leading the members of Casa Tigre away. "Let us discuss the details of your defense. I can assure you, it will be quick and to the point."

Most of them at least looked a little guilty about it, sharing apologetic glances before disappearing into another room. Monty lingered just a moment longer.

But not everyone had left. Lilac remained behind.

"What, not done rubbing it in yet?" Delilah spat.

"I'd like to give you some advice," the skunk replied. "Believe it or not, even I wasn't aware of Pierce's little scheme at first."

"Not much for teamwork, huh?"

"But he isn't wrong," she stressed. "Do you understand why Lady Tigre rejected your help? Even though you have earned the trust of your client, your aggressive tactics have caused no shortage of harm in the process."

"All I did was uncover the truth."

"And the truth can be a very dangerous thing," she countered. "I've seen it time and time again. Fresh new attorneys recklessly pursuing the truth with no regard for the consequences. It may sound harsh, but finding the truth is not our job. Defending our client is our job."

Delilah scoffed. "Right, defending our client. Weren't you the ones planning to settle for a plea deal?"

"Yes, in accordance with his wishes at the time," she reminded her. "And if we had taken that approach, what would be the result? Mr. Gosland would likely be worse off, yes, but he clearly had no regrets. Meanwhile, Lara and Chef Humphrey would still be together, Mr. Urshine would not have been faced with the possibility that he killed his own boss, and Lady Tigre wouldn't have had to watch her daughter be publicly accused of murder, or be shamed by the exposure of her husband's affair with their groundskeeper."

"Are you trying to say that it would've been a better outcome for her to stay ignorant? To keep employing her husband's murderer and mistress right under her nose?"

"I'm simply examining the possibilities," Lilac said. "Maybe this will be better for them in the end, maybe it won't. But the fact remains that a lot of the damage could've been avoided, even if he insisted on going to trial."

"What do you mean? The evidence—"

"—was right in front of you the entire time," she finished. "The bandages in the fireplace. The ashes on the carpet. You found both of these things during your initial investigation. You even used them against me to prove the existence of a third party. If you had just focused on that, instead of chasing any wild theory you could come up with, you would've found your killer much sooner. Instead, you only got there through the most ass-backwards, convoluted means possible, after going through the entire rest of the household first."

She shook her head. "This single-minded drive to save one person at the expense of any others, it really isn't so different from Ms. Nepeta's thought process, is it?"

Delilah flinched. "I…"

"You're out of line," Eric growled.

"Yeah!" Millie agreed. "Who are you to take the moral high ground after you left me in a cell to rot?! All so you could defend a serial killer!"

"..." Lilac paused, taking the time to brush her bang out of her face before responding. "I don't need your approval to do my job. He is my client and he deserves a fair trial. That is what it means to be a defense attorney."

Delilah audibly gasped, quickly stepping in before her friends could go off on her any further. "Wait! Lilac, I just want to clarify one thing."

"Yes?" the skunk asked.

"What the hell is your deal? Are you trying to be my friend or my enemy here? Because you're sending me more mixed signals than most of my dates."

So naturally, she answered her question with a question. "...Do you want to know why we leaked Ms. Muskerson's case?"

"That is explicitly not what I asked, but yes?"

"We wanted to test you. We saw the potential for new talent and thrust you into the spotlight to see how you would fare," she admitted. "Of course, the expectation was that you would crash and burn after biting off more than you could chew. But if you didn't, then you would only become even more exceptional."

"And if we did, that would be one less firm to compete against. I suppose that part was just a bonus?"

"To some more than others. But I certainly never expected you to end up on the same case as us. That gave me an interesting opportunity to see how you performed in person. So I decided to play the role of the smug, arrogant rival, to give you an antagonist to best. You seemed the type to be properly motivated by that."

Delilah glared. "As a theater student, I can tell you there's such a thing as getting too into a role."

She smiled back. "Ah, but you still played along, didn't you? You not only challenged us directly, but actually managed to beat me personally. I may have been toying with you a little, but believe me I was impressed. I wanted to see if you could actually win this trial, and sure enough, you pulled through."

"You've got a funny way of showing your appreciation. Weren't you just ripping into me for doing everything wrong?"

"What? Don't tell me you can't take a little constructive criticism," she teased. "But perhaps I was being too harsh. This new generation of lawyers has spent so long learning the rules, only to discover that the game has changed. You're at an unfair disadvantage really. And if there's one thing Tooth & Claw stands for, it's evening the odds."

The skunkette smiled. "Rest assured, I will be keeping a very close eye on you from now on."

With that, she turned on her heel and joined her partner in the other room, ignoring Delilah's weak shout of "Try using both of them for once and maybe you'll see better!"

Then she finally relaxed, letting out a weary breath she didn't know she was holding.

"Are you alright?" Eric asked.

"Yes. No. I don't know." She slumped onto the nearest bench. "Is it weird that I can't really tell anymore if I won or not?"

"Don't let her get to you. Tooth & Claw has their ways and we have ours. For what it's worth, I think you did the right thing. They may be hurt now, but the truth can only help them heal in time, and they'll be stronger for it."

"I hope so." Her slump evolved into a full-blown spread across the bench, staring up at the ceiling. "Can we go home now?"

"Of course." Eric held out an arm to help her up, only to find her tail wrapping around it instead. "...I'm not sure what you're expecting from me."

He then spent the next several minutes removing Delilah from the courthouse, dragging her across the floor by her tail.

---

3:14 PM

Badge & O'Possum Law Offices

At some point, Delilah was done with her dramatics, and got on the Justicycle on her own so that Eric wouldn't have to drag her. Even though her friend had done so for the long walk down to the parking lot with no complaint, she still felt bad.

Millie, however, remained firmly wrapped around her badger-beau's neck once they entered the apartment building. Delilah figured she deserved it for riding in the basket all this time.

It was a quiet, somber walk. Delilah didn't like it, so after arriving back at their office, and flopping onto the couch, she immediately piped up. "Well, what should we spend our big check on?" she asked, trying to focus on the good that had come out of this.

"Frankly, I'd like an official office, and separate apartments," Eric suggested. "No offense, but I have a feeling that we'll be getting more clients after this, and I'd rather your underwear draped over the couch not be visible." He picked up a bra, holding it far away from himself as he tossed it into a dirty clothes hamper.

"That's probably a good idea," Millie agreed as she unwrapped from his neck and stood back on her feet. "Maybe I can work the front desk!"

"Good thinking!" Delilah smiled back at them as she sat up. Even with the bittersweet ending of the trial, at least she still had her pals to cheer her up. Maybe that was all the sweetness she needed.

There was a knock at the door.

Eric frowned. "Who could that be? Don't tell me it's another client already."

"Isn't that how it is with murder mysteries though?" Millie asked. "Always coming at the most inconvenient of times?"

"See, this is why I preferred civil cases, with their civil manners."

But Delilah was filled with renewed energy. Ready to redeem herself, she hopped up to open the door. "Badge & O'Possum Law Offices! How can we…" Her voice died.

On the other side of the door was an older, grizzled opossum in a burgundy collared shirt and old jeans, holding a blue trucker hat in his hands, and a nervous grin on his face. "Howdy, Lil."

"...Dad?" Delilah finally managed to croak out. "What are you doing here?" It wasn't a hostile question. Just a shocked one.

Eric and Millie shot up in surprise, glancing at each other before both just staring wide-eyed at the open door.

"This was the address y'all had online, right?" The older possum looked unsure. "Hope I'm not intruding."

"No! Not at all!" Delilah quickly assured. "Uh… You wanna talk?"

"If ya got the time." His smile grew a little warmer.

Delilah cleared her throat. "Uh, Eric, Millie, you mind giving us some space for a bit?"

Eric nodded, smiling. "Come on, Millie. Let's visit that new ramen place around the corner."

"Oooh! Spicy noods!" Millie quickly raced out the door. She was slim enough to slip out past Delilah's father.

Eric started to follow her, but stopped for a moment. "It's good to see you again, Arthur. I know it's been a while."

Arthur grinned. "Good to see you again too, Mr. Badge! Dang, you've grown since you were kits. I still remember dropping you two off with the VanDals for playdates. How's Kyle been, anyway?"

He rubbed the back of his head. "We can catch up later. Evidently, there is much to discuss."

Eric paused a moment longer, then quickly left.

Delilah sat down on the couch, very awkwardly. "So, er… It's been a long time. Why'd you stop by?"

"Cuz I missed ya, silly!" Arthur said with a chuckle. He plopped down next to her, suddenly growing serious again. "Look… I feel real bad for how much pressure I put on ya. I blamed myself for a long time after ya ran away. I guess, after I finally got the news that you'd made your way, I wanted to come say I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry?" Delilah asked. "I'm the one who abandoned everyone."

Arthur shook his head adamantly. "Naw. You were just a kit. I shouldn't have had all those expectations. You had dreams ya wanted to chase. Ain't nothin' wrong with that. Heh! Wish I'd done it when I was your age." He gave her a playful punch on the shoulder.

Delilah rubbed her arm, laughing. The air between them gradually grew lighter. "That means a lot, Pa." Her voice got a lot softer, and her smile smaller. "But… I feel like I shouldn't have just run off like that. So how 'bout we agree we were both in the wrong?"

"If you insiiiiist!" He jokingly rolled his eyes. "But enough about that! I wanna hear about how my baby got in the papers all the way over in the Marshlands!"

As they settled down to chat about recent happenings, Delilah couldn't help but think that maybe these dark clouds had a brighter silver lining than she'd realized.

So ended our second murder trial, a case as messy as my bedroom and much less inviting. Slowly but surely, we were both getting used to this whole 'defense lawyer' thing. Which is good, because I'm pretty sure there's no climbing out of this rabbit hole now. Everything's happening so fast that we'll be lucky not to get buried under it all.

And only a few months later, we would be faced with both our biggest and smallest case yet.

---

7:30 PM

Public Prosecutor's Office

It wasn't easy dragging himself across the floor, ripping off a wooden bar from the witness stand, using it as a makeshift cane to hobble out of the courthouse, hailing a Zoober, waiting forty minutes for the Zoober, finding out the Zoober was going to the Upper Canopy Lower Courthouse the whole time, demanding a discount, being denied a discount, waiting another twenty minutes for a Zoober to come to the correct location, and then hitching a ride all the way back to his office, but the VanDals were nothing if not stubborn.

Which, come to think of it, was probably why he didn't just call MacTalon.

But he didn't need her now anyway. Kyle sat alone in the darkened room, illuminated only by the glow of the open laptop in front of him. Now that he had some time to himself, he felt the need to do a little research.

He had lost his first case today. Well, the first case he counted. To one of his old classmates at that. Eric and Delilah were already starting to make some waves, it seemed.

And it all began with that case involving Ms. Muskerson, which itself was tied to a much older case known as the IC-9 Incident. A case that had shaken the very foundations of the legal world as they knew it. A case that most of the public still knew nothing of, in spite of the drastic changes that came about because of it. A case that, by sheer coincidence, those two rookies found themselves intrinsically linked to.

He didn't believe in coincidence. Well, he didn't like coincidence. It robbed him of drama and intrigue, something that was hard enough to come by these days. He couldn't help but feel there was some kind of connection here. Maybe that was just wishful thinking, but he had the ability to find out.

More importantly, while Tooth & Claw needed to send an unpaid intern into Precinct 1 to take mere snapshots of the IC-9 case file, he as a public prosecutor could pull up a digital copy in a few keystrokes. Dull as his job could be, it did have its benefits.

Incident No. IC-9

Trial Data

Defendant: Lucas Bonechill

Crime: Serial Murder

Kyle's eyes threatened to glaze over already. He'd forgotten how dry these files could be. How was it even possible to make serial murder this boring?

Prosecution: Emilia von Gouda

He groaned a little. He knew plenty about her involvement already. The case might not have been made public, but that only meant she boasted about it extra hard to anyone she could. He barely even remembered who she'd been up against. Just some small, independent firm with a decent record, but nothing particularly remarka—

Defense: Lilac & Pierson Law Offices

Kyle leaned back in his seat, tenting his fingers in front of his face. Oh, there was a connection here alright. Just not the connection he was expecting. No wonder Tooth & Claw had such a vested interest in this case. But could even they manage to change its outcome?

Verdict: Guilty

"Heh. How's that for drama and intrigue?"

End

---

Court Record:

Attorney's Badge

This old thing? Well, it does let me do my job, but it mostly just sits in my pocket until I get the sudden urge to flash it at someone for kicks.

T&C Business Card

Those two are really gonna regret hoisting this off on me. I can think of a LOT of uses for a small piece of cardstock that were probably not intended.

Lord Tigre's Autopsy Report

Cause of death believed to be poisoning through injection of nogu toxin. Estimated time of death is between 3-4 PM. Victim died almost instantly. No trace of Delishafish was found in his stomach. Pinprick found below his chin consistent with Monty's lapel pin.

Crime Scene Photo

Shows Tigre collapsed on his desk as if taking a nap, somewhat undercut by the gaping hole in his neck. The rest of his desk is mostly visible, though the papers right under him are obscured. Side note: Totally a Number 4. Nailed it.

Food Cart

Monty's ticket inside the study, brought there by the bodyguard. Credit where credit is due, that was a pretty clever plan. Shame he mucked it up afterward, but then again we might not have a client otherwise.

Wine Bottle

Brought to Lord Tigre on the cart. Contains a grape wine and is partly empty. Also contains deadly pufferfish toxin. Bears Monty's pawprints.

Spilled Ashtray

Actually spilled by Ria, covering up a bloodstain she left on the carpet. And to think Kyle gave me lip over not preserving the crime scene.

Termination Papers

Almost no blood was found on them despite being right under Lord Tigre at the time he was stabbed, proving that he was already dead. Suck it, Lilac!

Lapel Pin

Monty's personal possession, that he didn't leave at the crime scene after all. He left it in the dining room instead, which isn't much better because it means anyone had the opportunity to swipe it. Was eventually found to be laced with nogu toxin, making it the real murder weapon. Found under Lord Tigre's desk.

Tigre's Gun

Chekhov was full of shit.

Burnt Scraps

Scraps of Ria's bandages found in the fireplace. I suddenly wish I actually cut myself on those thorns. Maybe then I would've pieced this together a lot sooner.

Manor Map

A map of Casa Tigre so 'graciously' gifted to us by Kyle. I'm half-tempted to relight the fireplace just to chuck it in, but I bet that's exactly what he WANTS us to do so we're gonna use it anyway! Out of spite!

(Archived under 'Casa Tigre Map' on Berserker88x's Deviantart.)

Delishafish Dish

Apparently this dish is a big deal among rich folks and super hard to make right. Even Chef Humphrey screwed it up on the first attempt. Oh, and it turns out it's deathly toxic if you screw it up, which REALLY would've been nice to know beforehand.

Spoiled Delishafish

The first version of the dish that Humphrey screwed up, though the arguably bigger screw-up was leaving it out for Sunny to find. Luckily for him, it looks like Lord Tigre didn't actually eat any of it, but he still threw it out the window anyway. Later buried by Ria, utensils and all. The missing chunk was found in the thorns.

Kitchen Knife

A large and thick steel knife given by Humphrey to Monty. The murder weapon? Not even close.

Other Knife

A smaller and thinner steel knife taken from Humphrey by the ZPD. Later dropped by Lara. This seems to be the knife that was used to prepare the Delishafish, containing a hidden love poem written by Humphrey. Which is appropriate, because reading it made me want to stab myself.

Wall of Thorns

A spiky ring of pain that surrounds the whole perimeter of Casa Tigre. For when you're just too classy to get a barbed-wire fence. Can confirm: hurts like hell.

Monty's Testimony

After being given a knife by Chef Humphrey, he got smuggled in on a food cart, stabbed Tigre in the neck, and then fled up to the roof with the knife before getting caught. Despite this, he remains insistent that he didn't poison his lapel pin or commit the murder. Finally a straight answer from this guy.

Sunny's Testimony

Due to a tragic misunderstanding, he accidentally delivered deadly Delishafish to Lord Tigre around noon. There he witnessed a conversation between him and someone else outside the window. Later, after delivering the food cart to Lord Tigre's study at around 3:30, on Monty's orders, he locked the door with the master key and stood guard outside until the murder went down.

Humphrey's Testimony

Lord Tigre announced that the staff was being fired at breakfast around 8 AM, in response to finding out about Humphrey dating his daughter. He then became Monty's accomplice and poisoned the wine bottle.

Ria's Testimony

She was witness to flying fish, surprisingly not a hallucination. Which she then proceeded to bury and not tell anyone about. She later spotted Monty on the roof after he stabbed Lord Tigre, watching as he climbed down a tree and fled around back to enter through the servant's quarters. She and Sunny caught him inside trying to plant the knife.

Lady Tigre's Testimony

After arguing with Lord Tigre over the breakfast incident, she and Lara retreated upstairs to the second floor. She visited Lara briefly, but they otherwise stayed apart. She claims they were both on the second floor for the entire span of time until the murder, but this also means that neither of them have alibis.

Bronze Figurine

A scary-ass effigy of Lord Tigre holding a sword and looking like he wants to cut you with it. According to Monty, it's currently facing the opposite way that it usually does. This is because Ria accidentally cut herself on it, then tried to cover it up like a klutz.

Gardening Gear

Protective clothes used to get through the thorns without being sliced up. Lended to us by Ria. Shame we had to leave it all behind. It would've made a sick Howloween costume.

Drainpipe Prints

A set of tigress prints found on the drainpipe connecting the study to the second floor bathroom, going up and down multiple times. They belong to Lara Tigre, having used them to sneak out to see Humphrey. Monty's prints overlap them. And our prints overlap his. And her prints overlap ours.

Medicine Bottle

An anxiety medication found in the second floor bathroom. I won't even try to write its name, but it was prescribed in Lady Tigre's. However, the medication itself actually belongs to Lara. According to the directions, two pills should be taken daily at noon.

Hidden Camera Photo

A photo secretly taken by Ria's automatic camera. It shows Lara on the drainpipe, next to Lord Tigre's body, holding a sharp needle she could've poisoned him with. But I can't present it as official evidence because that would be wrong apparently.

Profiles:

Delilah O'Possum
Age: 24
Species: Sassy Possum

Well, I won. Mostly. Can't say I exactly rocked the hell outta the case, and I wasn't very shiny either. But I did officially, technically, win. This is so much harder than I thought it would be…

Eric Badge
Age: 24
Species: Stuffy Badger

My best friend and partner in (solving) crime. He can be a bit of a stick in the mud sometimes, but I'm always happy to pull him out of it.

Millie Muskerson
Age: 22
Species: Polecat Who Wants to Tap That

Old friend, old defendant, current intern. Honestly worth the effort of hiring her just to see her make goo-goo eyes at Rick all day, but she's pretty well-organized too. Strikes a good balance between my lack of tidiness and Rick having entirely too much of it.

Lucy Sang
Age: 29
Species: Literally Bloodthirsty Vampire Bat

What can I say? Murderbat came through. I'd like to be able to rely on her for future cases, but that's entirely dependent on Judge Loggins and/or Warden Smiles, it seems.

Martina
Age: 29
Species: Questionably Alive Mouse Girl

Lucy's… friend? Servant? Voodoo zombie slave? Was debating even adding her to this, but I get the impression she doesn't have much in life, so here's to you, Marty!

Monty Gosland
Age: 23
Species: Mongoose That Buttles

Our defendant, for better or for worse. Definitely better now.

Lord Dominic Tigre
Age: 40
Species: Dead Tiger

The victim. Apparently big into shooting birds for sport and living in high society. Well, formerly living. The more I hear about him, the more I don't feel sorry for his death.

Lila Lilac
Age: 28
Species: Stuck-up Skunkette

One of Tooth & Claw's lawyers. Not exactly on my side but not exactly against me either. I think I'll need to keep an eye on her too.

Pierce Pierson
Age: 28
Species: Porcupain

Another Tooth & Claw lawyer and a prick in more ways than one. Seems pretty aggro for a guy who's so into defense.

Sigrid 'Siggy' MacTalon
Age: 25
Species: Wolverine on a Warpath

I really hoped I wouldn't have to add her to this. Let's just say mistakes were made and now this hardass detective kinda hates my guts. It's going to be mentally draining dealing with her, and physically draining if she makes me do any more pushups.

Kyle VanDal
Age: 26
Species: Rival Raccoon

This sly prosecutor is known for his keen eyes and dirty tricks. He's also known for half-assing most of his trials these days, earning him a very non-fancy nickname, the 'Apathetic Attorney'. For someone who's been such a jerk so far, in a weird way it's like he needs us in order to give a shit again.

Lady Tigre
Age: 43
Species: Bird-infused Tigress

Lord Tigre's widow, and the only one who seems to feel any kind of sympathy for him. That speaks much more to her character than his. She seems like a good mom too, and definitely willing to put her daughter (and me) in her place when needed.

Lara Tigre
Age: 19
Species: Teenager

I doubt I could call us friends, but I think Lara and I have at least reached some kind of understanding. Helps that she actually WAS trying to off her dad too, so I wasn't even that wrong accusing her.

Lenore
Age: 6
Species: Poetic Stereotype

Lara's faithful pet raven. Or familiar, just in case she's some kind of sorceress and takes offense. Probably eats telltale hearts or something. I dunno, I'm not into poetry. Or birdology.

Sunny Urshine
Age: 26
Species: Teddy Bear

I hope Sunny will be alright. That little pep talk seemed to get through to him. I bet he'll be a better bodyguard than ever now. But not gonna lie, I'd be curious to see him get in the ring again.

Ellias Humphrey
Age: 20
Species: Camel 2.0

At the end of the day, I think these two are gonna be fine. They share a love of terrible poetry and a mutual hatred of me. Here I am actually hoping Tooth & Claw can help them out.

Ria Nepeta
Age: 31
Species: High As a Cat

This is what I get for trusting a junkie! I've been there, so I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, and look what happens! Drugs are for YOU to get wasted, not to waste someone else!

Judge Loggins
Age: 45
Species: Beaver of Authority

Always nice to see a familiar face in these strange surroundings. Better than Kyle's at least. I wonder if she'd chuck her gavel at him if he annoyed her enough. That'd almost make it all worth it.

Warden Smiles
Age: 39
Species: Wocka Quokka

Lucy Sang's warden, a position I do not envy. The question is, was he always this cheerful, or did something in him just break after a while?