16
There's always a little thrill knowing I'm going to see Edward at the office, but after the weekend we've had, I'm painfully and embarrassingly excited to go to work.
That's why I wake up before my alarm, shower, do my hair and makeup for once, eat a good breakfast, and arrive earlier than I normally do.
It's going to be a good fucking day.
Jane isn't here yet, which is unlike her. She's always the first one in and the last one out. Even if I'm vibrating with anticipation to see Edward, I'm also still on edge after her purposeful silence.
But I tell myself it's fine. She can't do anything to me. Baking pies is not in my job description and if she has a problem with it, we can hash it out with HR.
My phone vibrates with a series of texts from my sister.
Alice: Send me your book, bitch.
Alice: Pretty please.
Alice: Love you.
Edward's encouragement over my potential book warmed my cold little heart so much that I finally told my mom and Alice all about it yesterday at lunch.
It's rare for me to open up about my writing, especially to them because the subject matter of my dad is so sensitive. But they were supportive, a little teary, and asked to read it as soon as I wanted to share it.
Clearly, my sister didn't mean that though, and wants it now.
Bella: Maybe I'll send it when I get home from work.
Bella: Also, you could have sent all of that in one text.
Bella: Sending three separate messages is obnoxious.
Bella: See?
Bella: Love you.
Alice: *middle finger emoji*
After I answered as much as I felt comfortable with about my writing yesterday, the rest of our lunch conversation was all about Edward.
It's also rare for me to gush over a guy, but that's because other guys aren't Edward. Now that we've acknowledged we have feelings for one another, he's changing me. Making me softer. More vulnerable. I'm unsure how he's doing it, but I also don't want to question it too much.
Maybe it's just a fucking Christmas miracle.
Even if I was bummed my day with Edward ended early, I'm grateful for the time I spent with my sister and mom. And it was productive because I ended up finding him a gift. He's still going to get me, per his request, but this will be a little something extra. And he better fucking like it.
I'm thinking about him, therefore I have to text him. It's a rule I just came up with.
Bella: Are you at work yet? Come say hi, Jane isn't here.
Edward: No. I'm running behind. Some girl kept me on FaceTime late last night and I forgot to set my alarm.
He was serious when he told me to call him, and we ended up talking until two in the morning. I wanted to invite him over again, but I wanted to play it cool.
Bella: She sounds like a distraction and should've let you rest.
Edward: I was waiting for her to invite me over but she didn't.
Bella: lol stoppp. I wanted to. Why didn't you say something?
Edward: I didn't want to seem too pushy.
Bella: Well I was trying not to be too eager.
Edward: You don't have to play it cool with me. No waiting three days to text, no games. I just want us to be real.
Bella: Said no guy ever.
Edward: Except I just did.
Bella: You sound fictitious. Like you're a male written by a female.
Edward: lol you want to fight about it or do you want to let me finish doing my hair so I can get to work and see you?
Bella: OMG. I knew you had a whole hair routine. Pic please.
Less than a minute later, he sends a selfie. He's not looking at the camera, but his hair is a wreck, and a shade darker because it's slightly damp.
Before I can say anything, he sends another selfie, but this time he is looking at the camera and the collar of his black polo is up.
Edward: I popped it just for you.
I laugh out loud, causing a couple of coworkers to look my way.
Bella: Okay stop, I'm getting stared at for laughing.
Edward: Laughing? I thought you'd be moaning...
Bella: Cocky much?
Edward: Just when it comes to you.
I smile at my phone.
Bella: I love that we can flirt now.
Edward: Newsflash, we always flirted.
Bella: I know, but it hits differently now.
Edward: Yeah, it does. But I like it better this way.
I send him a kissing emoji.
Bella: Me too. I'm bummed I won't see you until lunch.
Edward: Come to my floor later for something. Anything.
Bella: lol okay I'll figure something out when you get here.
The elevator door dings and a stupid grin spreads across my face because part of me thinks Edward is actually here and is coming to say hi. Like maybe he snapped those photos earlier to throw me off and surprise me.
Instead, I see Jane.
And Sue from HR.
It takes a second for my brain to catch up and I'm still smiling as they approach me.
Jane glides past without a word or looking my way, heels clicking against the tile.
Sue slows in front of my desk and tosses a rueful smile at me. I notice she has a manila file in her hand. It's so thin, I half wonder if it's empty and just for show.
"Ms. Swan, can you meet us in Ms. Frost's office, please?" Sue asks, keeping her voice low.
My smile slides off my face.
I feel sick, even though I know I didn't do anything wrong. I mean, yeah, I did Edward. But it's not like anyone else fucking knows that.
A few people in their cubicles take notice of Sue over here and stare, not bothering to be discreet about it.
I don't know what's about to happen but I don't think it's going to be good. I'm never in trouble. I'm a fucking people pleaser for god's sake. I meet deadlines. I do my shit and more. I've never been written up or had any disciplinary actions taken, so this is making me panic.
"Yeah, of course, I'll be right there," I tell Sue, my heart racing.
I text Edward, not bothering to correct my typos or make sure it's coherent because I'm panic-typing.
Bella: Dude being called into Jane's officew ith Sue from HR, it sketchy
I don't get to check if he replies before walking into Jane's glass cage. I hate it more than ever because I know everyone can see everything.
Jane sits down behind her desk, leaving the two empty chairs for Sue and me. Jane still won't look at me, but she has a smug air about her. It feels like she already won.
I wait for one of them to speak, but Jane's eyes are glued on Sue. Even Sue looks uncomfortable. Like she doesn't want to be here. Like she's about to do something she knows isn't right but is going to anyway.
"First, I have to start by saying thank you for your time here at the company, Ms. Swan," Sue begins. "You—"
"Am I getting fired?" I blurt.
Sue stays calm. "Are you aware of the employee handbook, Ms. Swan? It's a requirement to read and sign off on it during onboarding so I assume you are familiar with it."
"Yes, I know what's in the employee handbook. I know what's required of me," I tell her. "And call me Bella, please."
Sue softens. "Bella, it seems you violated company policy, and that's what we are here to talk about today."
I stay silent because I'm not sure which policy she's talking about. There's no way in hell they know about Edward and me, so I don't implicate myself.
"I don't know what you're talking about," I say, and a small disapproving hum escapes from Jane's mouth.
"Can we get on with this?" She looks at her glitzy watch. "I have a nine o'clock."
"No, you don't. Your nine o'clock canceled," I remind her.
Her eyes finally shift my way, and her stare is cold. "You stole from the company. So you're fired," she snips, then looks at Sue. "There. How hard was that? Are we done here?"
I'm so fucking confused. Sue looks surprised Jane blurted that, but she also doesn't speak up. Dread sits heavy in my stomach because it seems HR is going to let Jane run this show, even though she lacks the human part of the equation.
"What are you talking about?" I ask Jane. "Stole what?"
"It's no use lying because I saw you on Friday night. You were on your way out and grabbed a stapler from the supply closet. You stuck it in your bag, did you not?"
"That's what this is about? A fu—" I stop myself from cursing. "A stapler? An office supply that costs five dollars?"
"Company property," Jane says firmly. "There's no telling what else you've stolen during your year here. I've had personal items go missing from my office and I wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt, but clearly, you have no integrity and cannot be trusted."
"I took the stapler as a joke!" I say, even though it doesn't sound like it would be remotely funny. "I've never stolen anything from you. You're just upset because you demanded I make pies for your family dinner on Saturday and, for once, I didn't listen to you."
She inspects her sharp, red talons. "I have no idea what you're talking about. I haven't eaten or looked at a slice of pie since 2010."
Her blase, condescending tone makes my face burn.
"I have proof in our texts," I point out. "And you want to talk about integrity? Yeah, maybe I don't have any because I've let you demean me for the past year doing your bitch work," I say hotly.
Jane's unaffected by my words and looks at Sue. "You might need to call security. I told you she was going to get hostile."
"I'm not hostile," I say, sounding even more pissed off. "I'm upset because I'm being wrongly terminated without even the chance to defend myself." I look at Sue, pleading. "You understand this makes no sense, right? I can give the stupid stapler back."
Sue looks torn. "I'm very sorry but—"
"Do you even know how awful she is?" I ask, but don't wait for her to reply. "No, you probably don't because I never said anything. I wanted to suck it up and now I realize that was wrong. I do so much work for her that isn't my job. I've spent hours making food for her to pass off as her own. I run errands for her that aren't work-related. On the rare day off I had a couple of weeks ago, to be with my family on the anniversary of my father's death, Jane called me twenty times. Twenty times! I finally answered and guess what she wanted? For me to come in and fix the copier. So I did because I wanted her to see my work ethic," I say in a rush, feeling my chest and neck grow warm with stress hives. "But now I realize none of the tasks she gave me were to prove I'm anything other than naive."
Sue does look sympathetic but it also doesn't seem like this decision is going to change. I spoke up too late. And that's on me.
"You're deflecting and it's not working," Jane muses, and doesn't look the slightest bit scared by my accusations. And I guess why should she? If no one's ever spoken up before, it probably does look like I'm throwing out any old thing to save face.
"She's retaliating because she's mad at me," I tell Sue, the conviction in my voice fading. "Why can't this just be a write-up? A slap on the wrist? Or relocate me to a different floor or department. The punishment doesn't add up to the crime."
Jane shrugs coolly. "I didn't make you steal, Bella. It's as simple as that. And Washington is an at-will state. We don't need a reason to fire you. But maybe we'll leave out this little gross misconduct so you can still apply for unemployment," Jane offers as if she's doing me a favor. "I'd be happy to do that for you."
I'm at a loss and feel so fucking defeated. Rage and embarrassment simmer in my chest. I can feel tears start to burn my eyes but I hold back. I will not let this bitch see me cry.
"There's nothing I can say or do?" I ask Sue, one last try.
"We can schedule an exit interview for after Christmas if you feel you have more to say about your time here," Sue offers. Staying calm and focused, she opens the folder in her hands and slides a paper my way. "But for now, you can sign this termination form and pack up your belongings."
With all of my colleagues watching in confusion and security standing nearby, that's what I do.