Disclaimer: If John and Anna were mine, we would've had many more happy family storylines onscreen. Instead, I just have to imagine them.
This story is dedicated to lemacd, without whom it would never have come to be.
At Christmas, all roads lead home.
- Marjorie Holmes
December 20
"London?!" said Anna Bates to her husband. "Tomorrow?"
"Yes, unfortunately," replied John. "His lordship has been called on some urgent business that he says can't wait until the new year."
Anna sighed. She hated being separated from John at any time of the year, but the days before Christmas would be especially hard. Christmas was a time for family, and it felt wrong that John would have to be away.
"Well, we'll have to make the best of it. You will be back in time for Christmas, though, won't you? Johnny has been talking about little else for weeks now. That and the cuddly teddy bear that Miss Caroline told him he should request from Father Christmas."
"Lord Grantham says that we'll return on the 23rd, so yes – just a quick trip."
"That's something, at least."
"Yes. I'm so sorry, my love."
"It can't be helped. We'll miss you, is all."
"And I'll miss the two of you, and counting the days and hours till I return."
"We still had that last errand to run before Christmas…we were going to find a teddy for Johnny in the village the day after tomorrow on our half-day."
"Leave it to me. London has so much to offer; I'm certain I'll easily find a teddy there."
"If you're sure…?"
"I am. I'll bring it back with me on the 23rd, like an early Father Christmas. I can't promise I'll arrive in a sleigh pulled by reindeer, though."
"Silly beggar," said Anna with a chuckle.
"I might be, but at least I'm your silly beggar," John grinned.
"I wouldn't have it any other way," said Anna affectionately. "Hurry back, John – the cottage feels empty when you're away."
"As soon as I'm able, my darling."
December 21
"Goodbye, Johnny. You and Mummy look after each other, all right?" John said, kneeling on his good leg so he could look the boy in the eye.
"Come back soon, Daddy. It's almost Christmas!"
"I'll be back in two days. You'll barely have time to notice that I'm away."
John held his boy close, already feeling the pain of separation. It was always hard to leave his family, but leaving during the week before Christmas was even more difficult.
"I must go. I'll be back before you know it."
"Promise, Daddy?"
"I promise."
John stood up. He and Anna had had a private goodbye earlier, so he just touched her hand gently, winked, and made his way toward the car.
As the car pulled away, John looked back and saw his family standing at the side of the Abbey, watching. The image blurred, and by the time he had blinked back his tears, the house was out of sight.
Later that day, Johnny chattered to Anna as they walked down the back stairs to the servants' hall for tea.
"When is Daddy coming home? Is he back yet?"
"No, love. He just left this morning, remember? He'll be home the day after tomorrow."
"Is that soon?"
"Yes, it'll be after just two sleeps."
"Can we make gingerbread for Daddy so he can eat it when he comes home?"
"I think that's a lovely idea, Johnny. We'll make it tomorrow afternoon on Mummy's half-day. He'll be so happy for the surprise when he comes back."
December 22
Anna and Johnny had mixed up the gingerbread and were sitting at the kitchen table, waiting for the loaf to bake.
"Mummy, Caroline says that Father Christmas is sure to bring me a teddy if I wish hard enough."
"Does she, now?"
"I've wished a lot and I hope I wished hard enough for a teddy."
Anna thought, not for the first time, that raising a child of modest means could be challenging if that child's playmates were all being raised in affluence. No doubt the Crawley children wanted for nothing in their lives, and were growing up secure in the knowledge that their wishes would easily become reality. She was thankful that it had not really been an issue thus far, but could see how it could become one, as the children grew older.
"Father Christmas isn't always able to bring everything we might wish for, but I'm sure he'll do his best," she replied with a smile.
Anna hoped that John would find a suitable cuddly bear in London. Thankfully, it was then time for the loaf to come out of the oven, and Johnny was distracted from Father Christmas and wishes and gifts by the enticing aroma of his favourite treat.
"After it cools, shall we taste a slice?"
"Yes, please!" exclaimed Johnny, with a huge grin.
That night when they returned from the Abbey, Anna made up a hot water bottle for Johnny's bed, then helped him get washed up and into his pyjamas.
"How many more sleeps until Christmas now, Mummy?" he asked, as he snuggled down in bed. Anna Bates pulled the quilt up under his chin and smiled.
"Just three more sleeps, darling," she said.
"I wonder if Father Christmas will visit…" he said. "And if he will bring me a teddy…"
"You'll have to wait and see."
"And when will Daddy be home?"
"Daddy will be home tomorrow afternoon."
"I hope the train goes fast," said the boy. "I miss Daddy!"
"You should see him at tea tomorrow. Now try to sleep." Anna kissed her son's cheek.
Johnny smiled. "Yes, Mummy."
Anna blew out the lamp, and left the door ajar as she left the room, knowing her son got fearful in complete darkness.
Once downstairs, Anna poured herself a cup of tea and sat down in front of the fire. She missed John, and couldn't wait to see him the next day. After so many forced separations over the years, she hated when he had to be away from home, and she knew that John did, too. But they also both knew it was part of his job: When Lord Grantham went away, John was required to accompany him. It was something over which they had no control.
She glanced out the window as she returned to the kitchen, and saw snow starting to fall. It was beginning to look like a picture postcard Christmas; perhaps they'd have a lovely blanket of snow by the 25th. Although snow made it more difficult for them to walk to and from the Abbey, the delight on Johnny's face would make it worthwhile.
That same evening Lord Grantham greeted his valet upon his return from his club.
"Bates…I trust that everything is ready for our return to Downton tomorrow?"
"Yes, milord."
"I must say I'm anxious to get back for Christmas with the family, and I'm sure that you feel the same."
"I certainly am looking forward to it."
"It looks like there is a snowstorm brewing out there. I hope it doesn't interfere with our travel."
"I'll monitor the situation, and if the weather gets worse, I'll telephone the station to check on the status of the trains."
"Thank you, Bates. If all goes as scheduled, we will be back at Downton with our families by this time tomorrow."
"Very good, milord."
After preparing his lordship's case for their return tomorrow and readying him for bed, John returned to his own room to get himself ready. He placed his extra clothing and his few other items into his worn leather valise. Last he retrieved a parcel from the wardrobe. He pulled back the brown paper, revealing the face of a soft brown cuddly bear toy. He smiled, thinking of how happy Johnny would be to have a teddy of his own, after playing with the Crawley children's bears in the nursery. Then he replaced the paper and set the package on top of his clothes, before snapping his bag shut.
He couldn't wait to see his family the next day.
December 23
The walk up to the Abbey the next morning was extremely cold, and a surprising amount of snow had fallen overnight. It was a relief when Anna and Johnny finally crossed the courtyard and pushed open the staff door. While it could be hardly called warm downstairs, the air inside felt so much more comfortable compared to the frigid temperatures outside.
"Good morning, Anna," greeted Mrs. Hughes with a smile, as they removed their heavy coats. "And good morning to you, young Johnny!"
"Say good morning to Mrs. Hughes," prompted Anna.
"Good morning, Mrs. Hughes," said the boy. "My Daddy is coming home today and it will be Christmas in two more sleeps!"
"That it will. You must be very excited!"
Johnny rewarded the housekeeper with a smile.
"I'll just take him up to Nanny," said Anna. "And I'll be back down before breakfast."
"Mrs. Patmore is not quite ready, so you've time."
"Thank you, Mrs. Hughes."
Anna led Johnny up the servants' staircase, then out into one of the plush corridors. They stopped outside the nursery door.
"You have a lovely day, Johnny. Mummy will be thinking about you, and I'll stop by to see you whenever I can."
"Bye, Mummy!" waved Johnny, as Nanny came out to usher him into the room.
Anna felt a pang, as she always did when saying goodbye to her son, but she set that feeling aside and hurried back down to the servants' hall to begin another busy day.
Anna slipped into her seat just as a generous serving of hot porridge topped with cream was set down in front of her. It saddened her to see John's seat at the table empty for another meal, and she distracted herself by tucking in quickly. A full stomach would help keep her warm.
Anna Bates, buck up! she thought to herself. You've been through far worse over the years. A few days apart is no hardship, and he'll be back this afternoon.
Still, when Lady Mary's bell rang, she was thankful to have something else to focus on.
"Ah, Anna, good morning," smiled Lady Mary, as Anna set her breakfast tray down in front of her. "Are you all ready for Christmas at home?"
"For the most part, milady. We still have a few bits to take care of. Mr. Bates and I were going to do one last bit of shopping in the village yesterday, but then when he found out he'd be in London with his lordship, he offered to look there."
"A husband doing the shopping – how novel."
"I'll see whether he was able to get it done when he returns this afternoon," Anna chuckled.
"This afternoon…? Oh, you haven't heard yet…?"
"Heard what, milady?" Anna's brow furrowed.
"His lordship rang early this morning. There are delays with the trains in London, due to heavy snow. They are hoping to leave later today, but it wasn't sounding promising."
Anna's heart sank.
"Did his lordship have any idea how long they might be delayed?"
"No," Lady Mary shook her head. "He was hopeful that the delay would be brief, but it's all so unpredictable, with the weather."
She looked up from her tray and saw Anna's stricken expression. "I'm so sorry, Anna. I thought Mama would've informed Baxter by now."
"It's all right, milady," Anna replied, even though it was far from all right.
"You go down and maybe they'll have more information by now. I'll ring again when I'm finished and ready to dress."
"Yes, milady. Thank you."
Anna tried to keep busy all morning. It was far better for her state of mind to keep her hands productive and her thoughts focused on her tasks.
By lunchtime, however, Anna just had to ask.
"Any news from his lordship, Mrs. Hughes?"
"No, not as of yet," the housekeeper sighed. "I'll need to speak with her ladyship about alternate plans for Christmas, if the trains don't resume by tomorrow."
This news did nothing for Anna's frame of mind. She couldn't bear the thought of Christmas without John, both for herself and even more so for Johnny. Their boy had been speaking of little else besides Christmas and John's return.
When Johnny came down for servants' tea that afternoon, Anna could see his eyes searching the room.
"Where is Daddy?"
"Daddy isn't home yet, Johnny. There has been a lot of snow in London, which has stopped the trains from running."
"When will he come home?"
"We're not sure, but I know he will come back as quick as he can."
Johnny frowned. He ate his biscuits and drank his milk, but his smile was gone. He was brooding, and his mood hadn't improved by the time Anna returned him to the nursery. She sighed on her way back downstairs, hoping that the next day, Christmas Eve, would bring them some happier news.
Anna tucked Johnny in to bed that night, kissing him on the cheek.
"Mummy, where is Daddy?"
"Still in London, love."
"Will he be home for Christmas?" The boy's lower lip trembled, and a tear rolled down his cheek.
"I hope so, darling." Anna wrapped him up in her arms and held him close, wiping away his tears with her handkerchief.
"Mummy? I don't want a teddy any more. I just want Daddy."
At that, tears spilt down Anna's cheeks as well. She held her son close in the dark, and wished and hoped for a Christmas miracle.
December 24
The next morning John greeted Lord Grantham with a grim look on his face.
"What is it, Bates? Have you rung the station?"
"The telephone isn't getting through, milord. I believe the lines must be down due to the weather."
"Blast," exclaimed his lordship. "We're already a whole day behind schedule. Well, we're ready to go. After breakfast, let's take our chances and go to the station. We can see what's what when we get there."
"Very good, milord. At least we will find out what's happening, which is more than we'll learn by staying here."
"Any word yet, Mrs. Hughes?" Anna asked the housekeeper when she returned downstairs after speaking with Lady Grantham that morning.
"Her ladyship has heard nothing more. If you look outside, the snow has become quite deep. I hope they are able to return, but…"
Anna knew what Mrs. Hughes was trying to say and she nodded, even as her heart sank.
The two men had spent all morning in the waiting room at the station, hoping for information, so far to no avail. After lunch Bates went to speak with the staff in the booking office once again.
"Good news, milord," said John, upon returning to Lord Grantham. "The tracks are now clear, at least as far as York. Beyond that, they're not certain, but…"
"I say we go ahead. At least in York we'll be close to home, and perhaps by the time we get there, the local trains will be running again, as well. We won't be able to ring Downton to let them know that we are on our way, but hopefully the lines will be working again by the time we get to York."
"Very good, milord. I'll take care of the tickets."
"How are you holding up?" asked Lady Mary, as Anna was helping dress her for dinner.
"I'm all right, milady…hoping they'll get home in time for Christmas, of course, but…"
"I know it must be difficult to be without Bates at this time of year, especially with Johnny. Let's hope that things improve and he and his lordship are able to return tomorrow. That will still be Christmas Day."
"Yes, milady."
"Unfortunately the telephone lines still appear to be down, but the minute I hear anything, I'll be sure to let you know."
"Thank you, milady."
It was 7 o'clock in the evening when John finally stepped down from the 3rd class carriage onto the platform in York and walked toward 1st class to assist Lord Grantham.
"Well, we made it to York, Bates – that's something to be thankful for."
"It certainly is. Let's find a seat in the waiting room, and then I will go the booking office and see if I can learn anything about the local to Downton."
Lady Grantham had told Mrs. Hughes that if his lordship didn't return by the end of the day, they would have a small Christmas celebration for the children the next day, but would delay their big Christmas dinner until his return.
During the servants' dinner, the staff discussed what these changes would mean for their own duties. Anna listened to the conversation, trying to eat, but spending more time pushing her food around on her plate till it finally got cold. She just wasn't hungry.
"How are you doing, Anna?" asked Mrs. Hughes.
"I'll be fine, Mrs. Hughes."
"I'm sure it's a disappointment to you. Hopefully Mr. Bates and his lordship will be on the first train north, once they start running again."
"Yes, I hope so, too."
"I can't believe this," said his lordship, as he took the last bite of his steak and kidney pie at a pub adjacent to the station. "We've made it to York, which is the greater part of our journey, but without the local trains and buses running, we have no way of reaching home. If we could telephone, we could have the car sent for us, as long as the roads were passable, but even that is questionable…"
"It's certainly unfortunate," agreed John. "Especially as we're so close to home. If I were on my own, I wouldn't mind it so much. But I promised Anna and Johnny before we left that I would be back for Christmas. Johnny's still so young; he won't understand why I didn't keep my word. I feel like I'm letting them down, even though it can't be helped."
"I'm so sorry, Bates. If it were within my power, I'd have you home tonight."
"Excuse me, gentlemen…" An older man with a white beard leaned over from a neighbouring table. "I couldn't help but overhear your predicament, and I wonder whether I might be of assistance."
"A sleigh?" said his lordship, in surprise.
"Yes. I know that automobiles are the new thing, but in winter I swear by my sleigh. It can snow all it likes, and I can still get to most places," the man smiled, adjusting his spectacles. "I'm happy to run you to Downton, if you don't mind the cold and wind. I have blankets, but it does get very chilly. There's not much protection from the weather in an open sleigh."
"What do you say, milord?" asked John.
"I'd say it's a godsend, Bates. If we wouldn't be inconveniencing you too terribly much, my good fellow."
"I have no family close by, so nothing I would be missing out on. And it would be my honour to help your families have a happy Christmas by getting their menfolk home."
"If you're certain it's not too much to ask…?" John said.
"I'm offering, and I'm happy to do it."
John and Lord Grantham shared genuine smiles for the first time that long, long day.
Christmas Eve in the servants' hall was a jolly affair, as it usually was. Andy played the piano and everyone else sang, filled up on sweets, and enjoyed a bit of a tipple. The uncertainty of Lord Grantham and Mr. Bates's return was on everyone's minds, but they put a brave face on it, as there was nothing any of them could do.
Anna was grateful for the company of her coworkers and friends, and Johnny was distracted by the singing and treats. By 10 o'clock, however, Lady Mary was settled for the night and it was time to start the walk home.
Anna bundled Johnny into his thick coat, and helped him into his woolen hat, scarf, and gloves, before putting her own warm things on.
"Are you sure you'd rather not just stay here tonight, Anna? You could stay in your old room."
"Thank you, Mrs. Hughes, but I think it will be better for Johnny to be at home in his own bed."
"I can understand that. Mind how you go, though, through all that snow."
"We'll manage."
"See that you do. You're very important to all of us, and I surely don't want Mr. Bates asking why we didn't take care of you in his absence."
Anna squeezed the housekeeper's hand, and smiled. "You be careful, too, on your own way home. We'll be fine, and home within the half hour."
The snow on their way home was deeper in spots than Anna had expected, and it was actually close to an hour later before she and Johnny finally arrived at the cottage. They were both exhausted and chilled to the bone.
Anna took Johnny upstairs immediately and helped him wash up and clean his teeth, and then changed him into his pyjamas. When she tried to settle him into bed, however, he clung to her, whimpering.
"What is it, love? It's very late, and past time for bed."
"I want Daddy," he whined.
Anna hugged him close. "I know…I wish Daddy were home, too. I tell you what – let's go down and sit together in front of the fire, just for a little bit, before we go to bed. We can even have a bite of gingerbread."
Johnny nodded tearfully, and Anna bundled him into his fuzzy robe, then led him downstairs. She built up the fire in the sitting room, then she made some hot tea and carried it back, along with their treat. She pulled a blanket from the back of the settee and settled them both under it.
"Where is Daddy, Mummy?"
"I'm not sure, love. Most likely he's still in London with Lord Grantham. But I'm sure he's trying his hardest to get back home to us. Let's send him our best and happiest thoughts so he can feel how much we love him."
They both stared at the flames, thinking of John, and soon Johnny's eyelids began to droop. Anna felt herself getting sleepy, too. Eventually she must have dozed off, because the next thing she was aware of was the faint sound of sleigh bells from a distance. She was certain that she must have been dreaming, until she realized that the sound of the bells was getting closer.
She roused, blinking slowly, and felt Johnny shift next to her. His eyes opened suddenly.
"Mummy - bells!" Before she knew it, Johnny had scrambled off the settee, and rushed over to the window. The ringing stopped, and he turned toward her excitedly, a huge smile on his face.
"Mummy, come! Father Christmas is here! He brought Daddy home!"
Johnny was jumping up and down, then running towards the front door.
"What?" said Anna. "Wait, Johnny – " She peeked out the window, not sure what she was expecting to see, and then her mouth fell open. A sleigh – yes, a sleigh – was in the lane in front of the cottage, and her John was climbing down with his battered valise. He said something to the driver, who gave a quick nod and a salute before pulling away and off into the night.
Anna rushed to the door, quickly unlocked and threw it open, just in time to see John walking straight towards them.
"Daddy! Daddy!" shouted Johnny. Anna tried to hold him back, but he ran right out into the snow to greet his father, who set down his valise and lifted the boy up into the air before pulling him into a bear hug.
"Johnny, you are a sight for sore and tired eyes, you and your Mummy both!" John threw a loving look at Anna on the front step. "Let's get inside, though. It is too cold out here!"
Anna hurried over to pick up his bag and, shivering, they all bundled across the threshold and closed the door behind them.
Anna carried Johnny into the sitting room and rubbed his cold, wet feet down with a towel, wrapping him up in the blanket once again. She then turned her attention to John, who had removed his snowy outer layers in the entryway and was now warming his hands by the fire. She threw her arms around his neck and buried her face into his chest.
"I can't believe you're here! What…how…?"
So John sat down with his family and told them about his very long and unconventional road home.
"How did Father Christmas find you, Daddy?"
"Father Christmas?"
"Yes, in the sleigh," Johnny prompted him. "I wished for him to bring you home. In my wish I said I didn't want a teddy anymore; I just wanted him to bring you, and he did."
"That man was just a very kind stranger who…" John paused.
"He had a white beard and a sleigh with bells, just like Father Christmas!"
"You know, I never actually caught his name." John pondered thoughtfully. "I wonder…"
"Thank you, Father Christmas, for bringing my Daddy home! Thank you!" Johnny hugged his father so tightly that John wondered whether he had ever felt so loved.
"Speaking of Father Christmas, Johnny, would you please fetch me my valise?"
"It's not Christmas, John," said Anna. "Are you sure you wouldn't rather wait till morning?"
John pulled his watch out of his waistcoat pocket. Glancing at it, he smiled wryly. "It's well past midnight, so it actually is Christmas Day, even if we haven't slept yet."
Johnny dragged the valise over to his father, who opened it up. "There should be a package right on top for a very special boy. Do you see it?"
Johnny pulled out the brown paper package, his eyes wide.
"Open it, son," prompted John. The boy carefully pulled the string off and opened the paper.
"A teddy! Is it for me?!"
"I believe it must be, unless there is another small boy here who was wishing for one."
"Thank you, Daddy!" Johnny hugged the bear tightly.
"Thank Mummy, too," said John. "The bear is from her, as well."
"Thank you, Mummy!"
"Happy Christmas, Johnny!"
"Father Christmas brought Daddy instead of a teddy, but now I have a teddy from you!"
"That you do. And now I think it's time you got into your bed and slept. Would you like to take your teddy with you upstairs?"
"Yes, please!"
John lifted Johnny and the teddy into his arms and carried them upstairs, Anna following close behind.
After settling Johnny into bed, John and Anna returned to the settee in front of the fire.
"I still can't believe you're here," whispered Anna, gazing into his eyes. "I thought Johnny and I would end up on our own this Christmas, with you stranded in London till the weather improved."
"I can't believe it, either. Lord Grantham's old pluck from his army days re-surfaced, and he decided we should go straight to the station for news, when we couldn't get through on the telephone. Thankfully the major line to York was cleared and running again by the afternoon, but when we arrived in York, we realized we were effectively stranded. We couldn't ring the house to send the car, because the telephone lines were down, and none of the local trains or buses was running. When it got late, we went into a local pub for a meal, and that was where the man with the sleigh overheard us talking. What a stroke of luck that was."
"Yes. Or a miracle…a Christmas miracle." Anna snuggled closer to John. "And speaking of miracles…I have a special gift for you." She looked him in the eyes, then took both his hands in hers, and placed them flat on her stomach.
John's eyes widened. "Anna…what are you saying? Are you…. Are we…?"
"Yes, John."
"Really?"
"Really."
"When…?"
"Early summer, I think…June would be my best guess."
"Oh, my darling…" John's eyes filled with tears, and he kissed her softly. "We need to take you to see Dr. Ryder soon."
"Yes, sometime in the next few weeks would probably be best. I'm sure Lady Mary won't mind if I'm away for a day." Anna looked down for a moment, then found his eyes again. "John - I've been thinking…since you've been away, and especially the last couple of days, when it looked like we'd have to have Christmas without you…"
"Yes?"
Anna took a deep breath, and then looked at him with resolve. "I think it's time for us to revisit our old dreams." She remembered an evening back in 1916, when they had dreamt of children…and a hotel of their very own.
John gasped softly, and his eyes searched hers, but he let her continue without speaking.
"Having you away this week has made me realise – we shouldn't have to let other people's decisions determine when we can and can't be together. It's time we were our own masters. And now, with this new little one…it feels like we need to do this for us and for our family."
John squeezed her hand.
"I'm not saying it won't be a wrench to leave. But we need to put our family first."
"Anna, love, are you certain? I can't deny that I'm over the moon about this, but I don't want you to push yourself if you're not completely comfortable with it."
"It'll be difficult at first. But in my heart I know that it's the right thing for us – for all of us."
"Then we can start looking for properties in the new year. I would like to try to find something relatively close by, so we don't have to feel we're leaving everyone behind forever. We could maintain our friendships and connections, while still having a more independent life."
"That sounds ideal, John." Anna smiled up at him.
John took her hand again and paused before speaking. "I will always love this place – Downton - because it gave me a second chance when I thought my life was over, and it brought us together. It's where we met, and fell in love, and we've had our first home and started our family here. But I am looking forward to having new adventures and making new memories, because we'll be together – the two of us, with our children around us. And I can think of nothing better than that."
It had been an exhausting day and the temperatures outside were frigid, but in their cottage, in front of the fire, wrapped in a blanket and with their son safe upstairs, their hearts were overflowing. A Christmas miracle had given them the precious gift of time together, and their hearts were pointing them towards a new road home.
A/N: Much gratitude to JamesLuver for her ongoing encouragement while I was working on this fic. Your belief in me means so much! And I can honestly say that this story would never have come together without the generous feedback, ideas, and daily assistance of lemacd - I really can't thank you enough.