JUU

"All the noise you made before was scary," Sasuke said quietly.

Itachi watched with nervous panic as his Otouto's eyes wandered around the room, inspecting the mess that he made earlier when he was experiencing an internal rage that he could not control.

With the exception of his bed, his entire room was wrecked.

"You've never done this before, Aniki," he continued, palms pressing against Itachi's chest as he strained his neck to look over his own shoulder.

Itachi's arms remained tight around Sasuke's waist, even more so when he watched his Otouto's wandering eyes. He had hoped Sasuke would overlook this just once, but the boy didn't. He bit his inner cheek, palms clasped tightly behind the boy's back.

'I've done it before, Otouto. I've just had the sense to hide it from you.'

The distinct taste of iron filled his mouth, coating his taste buds. The longer Sasuke didn't redirect his attention back to him, the more rigid his body grew to a degree he felt like a trapped soul in a statue.

"I… haven't done well with sleep lately, and it has been affecting my mood," he muttered, shame slamming into his chest when by the scrutiny of his Otouto's gaze morphed into disapproval.

He'd lashed out for a multitude of reasons. First and foremost, the boiling anger was too much to bear. He'd bottled it up bit by bit, so unwilling to allow Sasuke to see just how nasty his emotions could get, only for it to implode in his face.

He was also disheartened by Sasuke's desire for a relationship. His Otouto was only 17 this year, much too young to engage in such intimate, sexual acts. Additionally, his poor choice in a partner resulted in the repeated marks all over his body as if someone was trying to ingrain in him their existence and deter any and all other potential players. Sasuke had spoken up for that person, too, and it made Itachi feel like complete shit as he blamed himself for the way Sasuke viewed love.

The marks left behind must have hurt Sasuke… right? Why else would they be so fucking dark and atrocious-appearing?

Itachi shook his head. It didn't fucking matter. His Otouto was delicate and frightened easily. Just looking at his tiny Otouto in his arms being swallowed up by Itachi's large body caused his protective instincts to flare up.

He didn't like the idea of his beloved angel getting hurt in any way, especially not like this. It was too barbaric, too animalistic, too intimate.

Of course he lashed out.

All his Otouto had ever known were the sweet, candy-like kisses Itachi divvied out to him in generous doses. Well, at least up until recent years when Sasuke scowled and pouted as he avoided Itachi's kisses and held off on giving Itachi some of his own as well.

"Is there something else that's been bugging you? You know, aside from….?"

Itachi's eyes refocused on Sasuke's, and his heart soared ridiculously in his chest when he noticed his Otouto looking directly at him.

"Yes," he answered. "I don't like it when you reject me, Otouto."

Sasuke sputtered.

"I don't like it when you refuse to sleep in my bed. I don't like when you run away from me or avoid me. I don't like feeling less important than someone else in your life." Itachi bit his lip. "It hurts my feelings."

"I… I'm sorry," Sasuke said. "You couldn't sleep well because you thought someone else was more important to me than you?"

He couldn't summarize it that easily, but he nodded along because it wasn't incorrect either. "I don't like the idea of other people touching you," he responded in a clipped tone, loathing the topic of conversation.

Sasuke's breath hitched. "Why not?"

"Because they don't know how to treat you well."

"And you do?"

Itachi's response was instant. "Of course."

His Otouto laid his cheek against his chest. "I'm sorry for acting distant," he murmured, eyes dropping as if lulled by Itachi's heartbeat.

"You don't give me kisses anymore," Itachi tacked on. He wouldn't say he was being petulant, but he did have a list of grievances.

"I don't?"

Itachi exhaled sharply, frustrated by how easy it was for his Otouto not to realize it. "You used to give me dozens of kisses in a day, and now, I'd be lucky if I got one once a month," he snipped, glaring over Sasuke's head at the opposite wall. It was hard to be mad at his Otouto when he was curled up in his arms like a freaking angel, his large doe-eyes staring up at him from the bundle of blankets he had wrapped around his body. "You just stopped out of the blue, and when I tried to give you some, you'd avoid me like the plague or made up some ridiculous excuse. I barely get to touch you anymore, Otouto. You know how shitty that makes me feel? I hate not being able to express how much I love you. It drives me batshit crazy. I'd rather–"

Something soft and warm grazed just below his collarbone and left behind a slightly wet sensation. Itachi froze mid-rant, eyes darting back to the boy in his arms whose lips hovered over his naked flesh.

Itachi blinked, astonished, and completely forgot what he was going to say.

Another kiss was pressed to his chest, this time above his beating heart.

Itachi felt like he was a fish out of water, his jaw unhinging while no words came out. Finally, he scowled and gathered his words. "Don't try to placate me with just that."

Sasuke trembled in his arms and the man began panicking, wondering if he'd made the boy cry again… until he saw a smile curving onto Sasuke's lips.

"Aniki, I don't think I've ever said this before because I'm only noticing it now, but you're so cute."

A myriad of emotions flitted across his countenance: shock, confusion, displeasure, and disbelief, which led to outright denial. But when he was about to rebut, he caught a glimpse of his beloved Otouto's grin, one of which held no traces of fear. Itachi noticed this and decided to let the comment go just once.

"If I'm so cute, why don't you kiss me more?" he grunted, clearly hung up on that little detail.

Almost automatically, he felt Sasuke's palms splay across his shoulders as leverage and platonic kiss after kiss after kiss was placed in every suitable location he could reach: Itachi's cheek, his chin, a few along his jawline, and even a few more on his chest when Sasuke settled back down and leaned against it.

In that moment, Itachi nearly squirmed underneath his Otouto's ministrations as an intense urge to cry and return what was received overwhelmed his senses, but he forced them down, sitting quietly to soak up the rare affection.

"Is that better?" his Otouto finally uttered.

"It's a promising start," Itachi said, hearing Sasuke's snort in return. "I wasn't joking back then when I said I needed a daily dose of you, Otouto," Itachi said seriously.

"Then, I'll find a way to make it up to you, Aniki."

Itachi's heart melted at the soft, coaxing words, and he pressed a kiss to Sasuke's temple. "Okay," he murmured, squeezing the boy close.

Itachi closed his eyes and hummed. Sasuke felt so small in his arms. All he wanted to do was put him in his pocket.

"I love you, watashi no kokoro."

H.J.

Ever since the bathroom fiasco, a few things happened.

For starters, they had a conversation about Itachi's insomnia. The conversation went something like this:

Sasuke: "You can't keep taking medicine just to sleep, Aniki. It's not good for you."

Itachi (eyes sparkling): "You're adorable when you worry, Otouto."

Sasuke (while glaring): "Don't avoid the subject. We need to figure out what to do. Drugs shouldn't be taken long-term, because they can be habit-forming."

Itachi (smiling as he declares): "Then I want my sweet Otouto to sleep with me in my bed every night from now on."

Sasuke (jaw drops): "W-What?"

Itachi (now grinning, yet in a chiding voice): "The medicine can be habit-forming, Otouto."

Sasuke: "Don't throw my words back at me!"

Itachi (pouts): "Well, I won't need drugs if I have you."

Sasuke: "Urgh…. Sometimes, I like to have my own space, too, you know."

Itachi: "But Otouto, you're the one who said you like sleeping in my bed with me (dramatic puppy dog eyes). Was that a lie?"

Sasuke (sputtering while turning red): "'Course not, but still…. What if we do school nights with you and the rest on our own?"

Itachi (sniffling): "Are you throwing Aniki to the wolves on weekends then?"

Sasuke: "What? Of course not! Nothing is written in stone. We can revisit it if it doesn't work out. Geez, Aniki."

Sasuke had a headache just having the conversation with his Aniki, who used his dashing good looks and the situation in his favor.

Another thing that occurred since then was that Itachi's mood seemed to be improving… at Sasuke's expense. It'd been a few weeks, but Sasuke had almost forgotten how ruthless Itachi's teasing was.

It wasn't anything bad per say. Mostly, it was his Aniki's crazy words and obnoxiousness that turned Sasuke into a speechless mess half the time.

Sasuke supposed the most current thing that he noticed was Itachi's behavior. The teasing and jokes were the norm, but it wasn't until a few days down the road did Sasuke slowly begin to see a pattern.

His Aniki was acting weird.

For that, Sasuke had been jotting them down into his notebook.

Aniki won't stop barging in when I'm in the bathroom. He keeps suggesting we should shower together. He's never done that before. Not since we were kids.

Aniki says he's picking me up from school now. He left no room for my opinion. He basically waltzed into my bedroom, said, "Otouto, Aniki has decided to pick you up from school every day now," and walked back out in literally five seconds flat. I was too stunned to respond.

Aniki gifted me my favorite shirt today, the one that was ripped a while back. He also said he bought me some comfortable shorts to wear around the house. I wasn't weirded out until he stared at me expectantly for so long that I had to cough to break the tension in the room. I resigned and put them on. He was back to normal after.

Aniki had been glaring at everyone we walked past at the grocery store today. He doesn't appear upset when he looks at me, so I don't know why.

Aniki was napping in my bed when I was in the bath. Did he have an exhausting day?

Aniki hasn't been sleepwalking since our arrangement. Was it the medication that caused it then? It's only been three days so it's hard to tell. I'll just keep an eye on it for now.

Aniki has been joining me on the couch when I've been watching cartoons lately. He doesn't say much and that doesn't bug me, but he's been using my lap as a pillow so often that my lap isn't my own anymore.

"Otouto."

Sasuke jolted when he heard the man call him, pen freezing on the next line in his journal. When he heard footsteps approaching from the other room, Sasuke scrambled to shut the notebook and find a place to stash it, but with so little warning, he could only hide it behind him, only straightening out and facing forward when Itachi was right in front of him.

"A-Aniki, what's up?"

When Itachi didn't answer him right away, Sasuke realized the man was eyeing him suspiciously. His body broke out in a nervous sweat.

"What… are you doing?" Itachi asked, eyes roaming up and down his body as if scanning him for lies.

"N-Nothing. I was just getting ready to go to bed."

"What are you hiding behind you?" Itachi spoke slowly, gaze rooted on Sasuke's tense arms, which were folded behind his back.

The boy swallowed hard and laughed. In that split second, he took a gamble. "Oh, this?" Another nervous laugh left him as he lifted the journal in the air to show Itachi. "Nothing. Just something I use to take notes for school." From there, he tossed it casually onto the couch behind him. It settled there with a light plop.

He watched with bated breath as Itachi's narrowed eyes tracked the journal for a second before he turned his attention back to Sasuke.

Thank fuck.

"Oh, okay. Don't forget to put it away later so you don't lose it."

'Oh, FOR SURE,' Sasuke's mind screamed.

"Mhmm, I will. Why did you call me, Aniki?"

"Ah, I was going to tell you I need to stop by the campus library for a few research materials."

"How long are you going to be?"

"An hour or so max."

"Okay. Be safe, Aniki."

"So quick to get rid of me, Otouto," Itachi responded, the joke not quite reaching his eyes.

For some reason, that made Sasuke wince internally. What was he supposed to say to something like that? Don't go? Stay with me instead?

It'd only been three days and, somewhere deep down, Sasuke felt surveilled. It kept him even more on his toes, forcing him to keep his promise to himself to maintain a purely platonic relationship. He even did his best to refrain from any impure thoughts, but that was extremely difficult when his Aniki continued to grow clingier each day.

"It's getting dark out, so drive carefully, okay?"

The look vanished from his Aniki's face without a trace and Sasuke was the recipient of a smile and a light ruffle to his hair. "Of course, watashi no kokoro."

Sasuke walked with his Aniki to the foyer where he waited patiently for the man to put on his shoes. Itachi turned around after with an expectant look, and the boy did his best to prevent the blush from ransacking his cheeks as he pressed himself on his toes and kissed Itachi's cheek.

That was another thing that was different. Sasuke had promised to make it up to his Aniki, and now, their routine included a hello and goodbye kiss.

The smile Sasuke received each time he delivered a peck to the man's cheek was not good for his heart. This moment was no different.

"I'll be back soon, Otouto," Itachi murmured.

Sasuke nodded.

"Oh, and Sasuke," his Aniki said, staring over his shoulder at him as he reached for the door knob, "no guests."

The way his Aniki said the word "guests" made Sasuke shudder and definitely not in a good way. There was a glint in the man's eyes, an inaudible but very explicit warning, that made the boy swallow hard and nod his head.

"Say it," Itachi commanded.

"No guests," Sasuke replied in a whisper.

Satisfied, the man opened the door, and he was gone.

Sasuke exhaled loudly and trudged back to the living room. He grabbed the journal, turned off the lights, entered his room, and stashed the notebook away amongst a box of books underneath his bed.

He collapsed onto his bed for a good minute after, thinking about everything and nothing altogether. It was a school night, so he didn't plan on going to bed late, so Sasuke forced himself to get up, grab some pajamas from his closet and turn on the shower.

The steam rose quickly, blanketing the bathroom with a thin sheet of mist. Sasuke breathed it in deeply, enjoying the comfort that came with the atmosphere while he allowed the events that transpired a few moments of his attention.

If he was being honest with himself, he never knew just how scary his Aniki could be. In the past, his Aniki would dote on him and give him everything he wanted in his own roundabout way, but lately, he seemed on edge, and while he still spoiled Sasuke and showed him unconditional affection, he had drawn some boundaries for him.

For instance, his Aniki had been very firm about the no guest policy lately. The man made it very clear there were no exceptions to that rule either. It didn't bother the boy too much since Sasuke rarely had friends over in the past, but what did make him feel a little funny was the repeated reminder of it every time Itachi had to leave the house for any brief period of time.

There were also some items on his Aniki's list that he outright shut down without even so much as a discussion. Sasuke had been slowly gathering a list, and unfortunately, he realized almost instantly that the only way to know what made his Aniki tick was through trial and error.

For example, two days after the incident, Sasuke had gotten a free period at the end of the day. He didn't want to trouble his Aniki so he sent a message to the man.

Sasuke: Aniki, you don't have to pick me up today. I have my last period off, so a friend is dropping me off.

A reply had been sent, but unfortunately, when Sasuke read it, he was already in his classmate's vehicle leaving school grounds.

Itachi: I'm coming. Stay where you are, Sasuke.

Even though he knew he shouldn't read too much into words, he thought his Aniki sounded alarmed in that message, panicked, as if he'd received word that Sasuke had been kidnapped or something.

He quickly responded, hoping the man hadn't left home yet.

Sasuke: Sorry, Aniki. We just left. I should be home in a few minutes.

He received no reply, which caused him to furrow his brows. So lo and behold, when he was dropped off, his Aniki was fuming at the door.

"Did you not understand when Aniki said Aniki will be the one picking you up from school from now on?" Itachi seethed. "Was I speaking to the wind when I informed you? Who dropped you off? Why did it take so long? Why didn't you wait for me?"

Sasuke had racked his mind for a way to calm the man who was getting even more riled up by his own words, and when he came up with nothing, he could only test his luck by using affection.

He had dropped his backpack by his feet, walked up to the livid man, placed his hands on his tense shoulders to press himself up on his feet, and repeatedly placed kisses on both of his Aniki's cheeks as if he was soothing a rabid lion.

"Aniki, I'm okay. I'm home," he murmured, hugging the man.

Itachi had grunted, exhaling sharply through his flared nostrils. His tense body refused to uncoil until Sasuke brought the man's hands to his face and pressed them to his cheeks. "See? Nothing happened to me. I'm okay."

"Never again," Itachi growled.

"Never again," Sasuke promised.

Sasuke sighed as he stepped out of the shower. Even when his Aniki was angry, he was incredibly hot. The intense expression on his face reminded the boy of other intense things the man was capable of. The fucked up part of him wanted to equate his Aniki's anger to reasons that were far less honorable but catered to Sasuke's own fantasies, but as soon as his mind went there, he found himself shaking his head.

Clearly, there was nothing sexual about Itachi's intentions. It wasn't hard for Sasuke to recognize that his Aniki's overprotective behavior was the result of Sasuke's constant lies, and Sasuke should have been more sensitive to that. It was either that or coming clean, and like he said, over his dead body.

You reap what you sow.

He snorted. Understatement of the century.

He didn't bother drying his hair, laziness and sleepiness settling in, and simply pulled on a pair of shorts. When he stepped outside of the bathroom, Sasuke flopped onto his belly in bed with an oomph.

He fell asleep almost immediately.

H.J.

The house was quiet when Itachi removed his keys from the knob. With furrowed brows, he dropped his bag on the coffee table and maneuvered in the dark with great ease.

"Otouto?"

Did Sasuke go to bed already? He did say he was going to get ready for bed.

When Itachi opened his bedroom door and no little bundle of joy was curled up in his bed, his jaw clicked and a slow panic crawled into his chest.

He hadn't been gone that long. In fact, his entire trip took a little less than an hour. He had ransacked the library rapidly, mimicking the speed of a racing horse. Kyuubi had looked at him like he had grown another head, asking him where the fire was at, but Itachi had ignored him, and left behind a trail of dust.

Itachi nearly broke down his Otouto's door in a fit of anxiety. His thoughts swirled like a tornado in his head, wrecking havoc with each step forward until the door swung open and the man stopped dead in his tracks.

His gaze was drawn to the small form on the bed and, almost instantly, tension eased out of his entire body and his jaw loosened. Itachi approached and crouched next to the boy, whose arm was hanging off the bed, and used two fingers to swipe a strand of hair away from Sasuke's face.

"There you are, Otouto," Itachi whispered, fondness overtaking his words as he stared at the serene expression. "What are you doing over here?"

Itachi's fingers caught on a tangled strand, and that was when he noticed the boy's hair was still wet. "You didn't dry your hair?"

He frowned and stood, collecting a towel from the bathroom. The bed dipped under his weight as he settled down and maneuvered Sasuke so his neck was resting along his thighs, and ever-so-gently, Itachi ran the small towel repeatedly through Sasuke's silky strands. A small smile teased his lips when Sasuke's brows pinched together and a hand came up as if attempting to swat away a fly.

"Nngh."

"It's me, Otouto," Itachi murmured. "It's Aniki."

The wrinkle between his eyebrows disappeared as if the boy was soothed by Itachi's words and, slowly, Itachi was greeted with Sasuke's blurry orbs.

"… Aniki?"

"Mm. Stay still. I'm drying your hair."

"Hmm." His Otouto's eyes closed again and he turned in Itachi's lap, facing his hip bone and digging his face in there. "I'm tired," he mumbled.

"I know, Otouto. But you don't have a shirt on and your hair is still wet. I'm afraid you're going to catch a cold," Itachi said quietly so as to not rouse the boy.

"'s fine," came Sasuke's muffled voice.

Itachi nearly snorted. "It's not fine," he chastised.

He left the boy on the bed for a few seconds and stepped into the bathroom to grab the hair dryer from the cabinet. However, when Itachi turned around while shutting off the light, he nearly bumped right into his sleepy Otouto, who had apparently wandered off behind him when he got up earlier.

At the half-lidded gaze he received, Itachi couldn't help but chuckle. "How long has it been since you've followed me everywhere, my sweet Otouto? Since you're here, come stand in front of me so I can blow dry your hair."

Upon Itachi's beckoning hand, his Otouto blinked a few times and he trudged forward, going so far as to lean his back against the man's torso to remain upright.

Itachi stared at the boy's reflection in the bathroom mirror as he flicked on the blow dryer. Sasuke's eyelids had remained hooded the entire time as if he was in a daze until he finally seemed to have nodded off while in his upright position.

Was he really that tired? He did look more worn down lately to Itachi. Perhaps, he should call off a day for him tomorrow so he could get a good night's rest instead.

Ten minutes later, his Otouto's hair was fluffy and dry. Satisfied, he unplugged the dryer and stashed it away. Then, Itachi casually turned the boy to face him, hung Sasuke's arms over his own shoulders, grasped onto the backs of his thighs, and hefted the boy into his arms.

"Let's go to bed, Otouto," he murmured. The boy groaned quietly in return and Itachi's heart warmed when he felt him snuggle into his neck.

It'd been a while since his Otouto had been generous with his affection, and Itachi felt blessed to experience it again. His stomach did little flip flops in joy and a rare, genuine smile lifted his countenance in a way only Sasuke could bring out of him.

"'niki… 'niki…," he heard Sasuke mumble. A flourish of warmth hit the base of his neck..

"Yes, it's Aniki. What is it, my dear Otouto?" Itachi responded easily as if placating a child.

"… miss you…."

"Mm, I missed you, too."

Itachi started his way back to his room.

"'m sorry…. Don't… hate me… 'm sorry…."

Itachi paused, one foot out of Sasuke's bedroom door. Was his Otouto dreaming and talking in his sleep or uttering words while half-asleep? Itachi could not discern the disparity in that moment.

"Don't be silly. Aniki could never hate you, Otouto."

"'m sorry…. 'm sorry…."

When the words persisted and became a mantra, Itachi began to think Sasuke was having some kind of nightmare, one that involved him hating him for some reason. The idea made him frown. Why was his little Otouto thinking about such ridiculous thoughts?

He knew Itachi loved only him the most, so where did these self-doubts and apologies come from?

Upon reaching his room, Itachi carefully set Sasuke down on his bed and pulled the covers over him. He slid into bed next to the boy, noticing how quickly Sasuke curled up to his side. The man propped his head on his hand, elbow against his mattress, and gently patted his Otouto's back soothingly.

"Shhh, watashi no kokoro. Aniki loves you. Aniki loves only you," he cooed in soft murmurs, unsettled by the distress he heard in Sasuke's voice. "You don't have to say sorry. Aniki will love you no matter what."

A whimper escaped his Otouto's lips, prompting the man to look at his face. In the sliver of moonlight that peeked through the curtains, Itachi caught a glimpse of wet lashes and a look of utter devastation. One at a time, tears squeezed out from behind Sasuke's tightly shut lids and dribbled down his cheek.

The sight of his Otouto made Itachi's chest constrict painfully as if he'd been electrocuted. His heart rate grew unsteady as it bounced all over the place and he had a hard time reigning in his own emotions.

"… 'm sorry… 'm sorry… 'm sorry…." the boy repeatedly croaked.

Itachi's fingers flexed and he gathered the boy tightly to his chest, the force of his hold jerking his Otouto's body on top of his. He allowed Sasuke to lie on top of him and spread his thighs apart to make room for his legs, unable to ignore the uncomfortable feeling festering in his chest.

He didn't know what he was trying to do at that given moment. Perhaps, he was hoping that the tightness of his grip would abolish whatever horrible thoughts Sasuke was having, nightmare or not, or perhaps, he was hoping it'd show the boy how much he loved him. Either way, Itachi laid in bed for the next few minutes listening to his beloved Otouto's quiet sobs and feeling his shirt turn wet from his puddle of tears.

"Aniki would rather die than leave your side, my lovely Otouto," he said. "So don't you worry."