Susan sat in front of her computer, adjusting the camera with a determined look on her face.
"Alright, folks, it's Susan here, and today we have a very special Christmas Eve fanfiction request!" she exclaimed, her British accent emphasizing every word. "But before we dive into that, don't forget to like, subscribe, and hit that notification bell so you never miss out on my fantastic reviews."
She paused, taking a sip from her whiskey-filled mug with a wink. "Now, onto the fanfiction. It's a heartwarming tale of Santa's reindeer unionizing and demanding better working conditions. Let's see how this one plays out, shall we?"
As Susan delved into the fanfiction, she couldn't help but notice that her whiskey was running dangerously low.
"Oh, bother," she muttered, realizing that her favorite Christmas Eve drink was almost depleted. With a sigh, she turned to her loyal audience.
"Looks like we've hit a bit of a snag, my dear viewers. I'm all out of whiskey, and you know I can't review fanfiction without it. So, I'm off to Walmart to grab some more. Stay tuned for the chaos that might ensue!"
Little did Susan know that her cousin Meg, a stereotypical American, had been watching in disbelief.
"Susan, are you mad? There's a snowstorm outside! You can't go out now!" Meg exclaimed.
"Oh, cousin Meg, darling, don't be such a worrywart. I haven't been sober on Christmas in two decades. I'll be fine!" Susan replied dismissively.
Despite Meg's protests, Susan marched out into the snowstorm, determined to keep her Christmas tradition alive. However, fate had other plans.
As Susan navigated the icy streets, a sudden calamity occurred. She was hit by none other than Santa's reindeer, who, along with Santa himself, was on a practice run.
"Ho, ho, ho, what have we done?" Santa exclaimed, his rosy cheeks turning pale.
They discovered Susan, with her unkempt ginger hair and whiskey-fueled breath, lying in the snow.
"Oh my goodness! We've run over a homeless woman!" Santa gasped.
To their relief, Susan stirred and spoke, "I'm not homeless, you daft old man. Just British!"
Apologizing profusely, Santa and Mrs. Claus decided to take Susan back to the North Pole to make amends.
Meanwhile, back at the fanfiction critic headquarters, cousin Meg grew increasingly worried. Braving the snow, she ventured outside and stumbled upon the scene of the attack.
Hoof-prints were everywhere, and there were two large circular potholes, unmistakably the result of Susan's encounter with the ground.
Panicking, cousin Meg rushed home, determined to take legal action against Santa. She began calculating how much money she could get out of this and the number sure did satisfy her. On top of that she could keep Susan's gifts for herself. Cousin Meg even began daydreaming of the money and imagining herself celebrating dressed in a Carmen Miranda outfit.
But just as she was about to file a lawsuit, the door burst open, and there stood Susan, alive and well, with a gleeful Santa and a concerned Mrs. Claus behind her.
Santa handed Susan a lifetime supply of whiskey as an apology.
Meg however was still fuming.
"You're not getting that easily off the hook! Such reckless driving has to have consequences! Who even gave out a license to man who drives a sleigh and plays with elves? I will sue the pants off you, Mr. Claus!"
"Sue the pants off Santa? Really, Meg?" Susan scolded. "It's Christmas Eve! Can't we just enjoy the holiday spirit and a good drink?"
Meg rolled her eyes, realizing she couldn't argue with Susan's intoxicated logic on this snowy Christmas Eve.
And so Susan, cousin Meg, Santa, Mrs. Claus, Leo the cat and Rudolph the reindeer spent together the rest of day.