Chapter 1 - Alone

"I couldn't get a friend even if I paid for one..." I told my mum over the phone.

"Well, it wouldn't hurt for you to get out once in a while Emma."

"So it's my fault then, is it? It's my fault that I don't have a single friend?"

"I didn't mean it like that."

"Then what did you mean?"

"Take the office Christmas party for example. You could have gone, but you choose to stay home watching The Kardashians!"

"I hate crowds..." I heard myself whine.

My mum sighed. "Twenty-five people is not a crowd Emma."

"Whatever. I'm going to have a shower. I'm exhausted."

"Okay love, try to eat something...nutritious."

I rolled my eyes and said bye.

I threw myself onto my bed and closed my eyes. I pressed down on my eyes until I saw stars.

I don't have a problem being on my own. Pretty much everything that most 'normal' people would do with a friend or their better half, I'm quiet content to do own my own. I'll go to the movies on my own, the café, etc.

I won't dine out by myself though. That's where I draw the line.

When ever you go out and you see someone sitting by themselves, usually reading a book, you instantly feel sorry for them.

But now and again I get this feeling.

At about 1 or 2 in the morning when the lights are out and I'm in bed. The whirring of the air-conditioning filling my ears, making me nauseous. When all the thoughts leave my mind and my body goes cold. Water spills from my eyes and onto my pillow. My heart swells big and fat and a sharp pain jabs at my chest.

I thank The Sandman for bringing me some peace at about 4 in the morning. And as I finally drift to sleep, I see myself tumble down a black hole just like Alice.

All of a sudden I see light.

I pick myself up, and brush down the pleats of my skirt. I'm in a shopping mall now, at the Lancôme beauty counter. As I reach for my favourite perfume bottle, that's when I see her. She's heading my way.

Butterflies fill my chest. I can barely breathe.

Regina.

The perfume bottle crashes to the floor.

As I crouch down to pick up the broken glass, I feel a hand on my shoulder.

"It's been so long," she tells me.