CHAPTER XLIII
Sitting in the one chair at the center of the room, with his back straight, arms crossed and a stern demeanor, Levi's eyes paid thorough attention to each one of the officers taking back their seats now having returned from the last break before announcing the verdict to the small, anxious crowd.
Unlike Eren's trial, the venue today didn't even gather half the audience in there, making the room look bigger than it was, but he liked it this way, where neither civilians nor the damned press had been allowed. Only a select group of officers from the different divisions were there, including the ones in the jury, and of course, his own squadron, not over sentimentalism or for moral support though. They were summoned as witnesses, and same happened with Flock, the accuser, who stood rigidly at the opposite corner of other Survey Corps.
Was he nervous? Not really. Whether they found him guilty or not, it wasn't like he'd be shot if it came to the first, especially in view of their military forces' precarious state.
What he was seriously eager for was to get out of there, not just the building but far from the city, away the fucking nightmares, hoping, perhaps in vain, that the adrenaline of the hunt could distract him, because his hateful inner self wasn't giving him a break, tormenting him about the fact that even when the clouds got to cover the sun, it was still there, waiting for his moment, and same applied to his feelings, which didn't help with the turmoil in his head since his fight with Elia, five days ago.
Not now! he commanded, focusing back on his current situation, trying to distract himself with the many faces there, some restless, other bored, and a few even excited while waiting for Zackly's words.
How long 'til this shitshow is over?! Levi wondered, tired of this already, almost thanking stupid Flock for clearing of his throat to try hasting the results, getting everyone's attention.
Fortunately, it wasn't long before all the geezers delivered their verdicts to the bailiff, who consequently passed them on to the Supreme Commander and Judge. By the time the process ended and Zackly read the sixteen pieces of paper, the man finally got on his feet, ready to speak, and as protocol demanded, so did he did he, with his eyes fixed upon him, ready to listen.
"Considering all the evidence presented, testimonies and the undeniable background on this matter, we can only deny Mr. Forster's accusation of partiality" the old goat reorganized his papers and left them on the counter before continuing "Therefore, and by majority of this court, I hereby determine that Captain Levi, is absolved of the charges against him" the instant he said that, the soldier heard a clear sigh of relief coming from the area where his subordinates were but didn't turn to find out who did it. For all he knew, it could also be Hange "… That being said, case xxx is closed today, Monday…"
As soon as the man was done, he responded with a slight bow of his head, to seal this business with respect. Immediately after that, Zackly and all the rest of high-ranking officers got up from their seats, picked their stuff and left the place, soon followed by the audience. So now it was just him, the guard standing behind him and his comrades still in there; the sound of someone stomping out echoing around informed of the redhead seething on his way out. He glanced in the brat's direction, noting he walked as if having something stick it up his ass.
There are other forms of retaliation… his mind offered, when he slammed the door behind him after having the audacity of turning in his direction and dedicate him one last nasty look, probably still believing himself untouchable. But to be honest, he seriously couldn't care less about Flock, unless the brat kept pushing his luck with his bullying on Armin.
"Let's go, guys" his eyes automatically sought the voice of his friend, who was now beckoning the others to follow her out of the room. To his amusement, their eyes had been all on him when she did, so he tilted his head to the side, so they obeyed.
You care about them just as much, you hypocrite… his inner self mocked when he noticed the worry and relief in their gazes. And though he'd never admit it, he knew he'd die to save any of them if the situation allowed him to.
"You may leave now, Captain" the soldier stood up and turned to face the guard standing there, right by the nearest door "Good day" he said and left after nodding once at him.
All alone in there, Levi dusted his pants with his palms and finally walked to the exit, nevertheless, at the very moment he was closing the door behind him, he sensed two pair of feet rushing towards him, making him sigh tiredly. Seconds later, he got two idiots throwing themselves on him; one hugged him from behind while the other stood right in front of him and decided to pet his head, patting him like a freaking child.
"Congratulations, my friend" the brunette said, snickering when she saw the exasperation in his face "Uh, I suggest you let go, kid. He's just as happy but let's not overwhelm the Captain with our joy, hehe".
"Way to go, sir! I knew it'd all go fine today" Connie let go, but then moved to Hange's side and raised a hand in the air, waiting for him to, apparently, give him five or something. When all he got in return was a raised eyebrow and a warning look, the kid finally understood the message "Sorry, sir. I got a little carried away" laughing nervously, he took a step back and used the same hand to wave at the others, soon to join them.
"I presume you got carried away as well" he said to Hange, that was now patting his shoulder, with a confident grin on her face.
"Being happy about this is no crime, Levi" she replied and stopped once the others got there.
"Wow! I never thought we'd see you sitting there, Captain" Jean commented, truly amazed.
"And being absolved, no less" Hange added, lightening the mood "Unlike us, it ain't fair you were the only one that didn't seem nervous. It took me everything to keep my hands in my pockets not to chew my nails the past two hours".
"I believe you all could use a little bit of this pressure now and then… it's the one time I've seen you keep miraculously quiet for so long" the soldier said, as usual, trying to put some sense in them "Just don't exaggerate. It won't do any good if you end up sulking like this fool" his eyes were now on Eren, whose hand instinctively moved to his jaw, probably recalling his own trial. As expected, that earned him a dirty look from the brat sharing the same bloodline as him.
"If you ask me, I'd rather face the entire martial court than the beating Eren took. We heard it was real bad" Connie noted, putting an arm around the guy's shoulders, taking pity on him "I'm sure the one reason he put up with it is merely because of his titan powers".
"Bad? Dude, he lost several teeth" Sasha shuddered, horrified, though not entirely at the prospect of pain, but the hindrance of missing teeth; that'd make it harder to eat "I'm glad at least they grew back".
"Aaah! Beautiful! Without a question, one of the most exciting days of my life!" Hange exclaimed, clasping her hands together, and adopting that characteristic dreamy expression of hers whenever speaking about weird shit "It took just a few hours before getting all his grinders back. I still have the others" she shared, enthusiastically.
"Ugh! Can you please save that to yourself, or I'll lose my appetite" Levi scolded her, flinching with disgust.
Right at that moment and before the brunette could say anything, a thunderous roar came from Sasha's stomach.
"I'm sorry" the girl apologized, lowering her face turning red "I skipped breakfast today".
"Still with the Shadis post-trauma, huh?" Connie mocked, nudging her side.
"Good old Keith..." their commander commented endearingly "What a man! His charming personality has so many layers. I always admired how he could go from caring and soothing to terrifying" she added, looking at him quizzically "I'm afraid you'll need to work on yours, my friend. Most of your layers are plainly intimidating" the others couldn't help cackling at that.
"I'll just ignore this much nonsense and go fetch something" in need of some food because he also had nothing that morning except a cup of tea, the man attempted to leave but the brunette didn't move.
"Hey, we're just being supportive of our dear captain, which happens to be you. This trial business had been super stressful, you know? What if we never get to see you past today?" Hange's eye got all teary, and then she dramatically covered her face with both hands when he rolled his eyes at her.
"Only a halfwit would believe that. Even more so when you were the one who provided the evidence that got me out of this".
The woman's crying suddenly turned into laughter, exasperating him, and scaring the brats.
"To be honest, I was hoping seeing you at least somewhat nervous about today but now I know only medicals can do that, right?" she winked, aware that nobody but the two of them understood what that meant. Still, Levi glared at her, reminding her how badly he regretted his decision that day.
"So that's why he got all cranky whenever I had to go to the hospital" Jean interjected, slightly tilting his head while holding his chin with a thoughtful expression. The others did something similar, surely trying to figure what scared him the most, not ever suspecting the truth.
"What could be scarier than needles?" Sasha wondered out loud, recalling the one time she had to stitch him up, not getting any sort of reaction from that.
"You all done with this idiotic conversation?" shaking his head, Levi grunted and tried heading towards the exit of the building but a familiar hand on his shoulder stopped him.
"Alright, man. How about we go for lunch somewhere cozy?" their commander came up with, planting herself before the whole group with a cheerful expression "Come on, Levi. A good day's always worth celebrating. We seldom have those, so…"
The question lit everyone's spirits, it was undeniable in the eager murmurs coming from behind, so much so that he could even feel everyone's eyes on him, as though they waited for his approval.
"And who's gonna pay?" weighing the idea, the prospect of a restaurant meal didn't sound bad.
Regardless his strictly structured life and daily routine had been always something soothing, it hadn't been working that well lately. He needed to take his mind off everything, and this little change could work.
"Errrr… it's on me, of course" his friend assured, shrugging, and then got uncomfortably close, grabbed him by the arm and started to guide him to where he'd been going before "Guys, let's go!" she glanced behind them, smiling with satisfaction to see they were following.
"You sure? 'cause my wallet is in my room right now" the man warned, remind her of the one time she'd done the same and thanks to a worn out pocket, he ended up saving her neck "Also, let go of me".
"100% sure. But before I do, come here" she said with a conspiratorial gesture, pulling him even closer "It's a surprise but we've received several invitations since we came back" she shared, checking on the brats following behind, clueless and definitely enthusiastic about this "And today feels like a good chance to accept one at least".
She then overtook him five steps, turned, and began walking backwards to keep chatting.
"You know how chaotic this lot is and you're still willing to take them somewhere public?" he enquired. Although, to be fair, Hange was pretty much the same, so she clearly was oblivious to it "Never mind".
"Cut them some slack, man! For instance, just try not to threaten them much or the food could give them indigestion" the brunette smirked and then finally turned, as they left the building.
Having no idea where she was taking them, it was clearly somewhere at the city center, and despite the curious glances on them as they passed through, thankfully no one dared getting any closer. They merely greeted them with whatever gesture or timid smiles, which according to his friend, it was had something to do with the word back-off! written all over his face, which he couldn't care any less. His thoughts laid elsewhere, still reflecting on the fact that Erwin had foreseen this situation, and unsurprisingly, made sure to leave something that would serve as a good defense; in this case, one of the journals passed on to Hange, dedicated exclusively to the uprising, how he obtained the syringe, notes from every subsequent meetings to discuss about it, including faithful transcriptions of the one where it was decided the serum would be entrusted to him.
He only wished he could have also left a guide on how to proceed from now on. He trusted her but he wasn't sure if she trusted herself.
"What is it?" the brunette suddenly asked as she still guided them through the city streets "You look more worried now than hours ago".
"There's much to be done not to be worried" he replied, noting a sting of anxiety in her eyes she quickly disguised with a calm smile, not because that felt like a reprimand but because she'd managed to momentarily forget this huge responsibility upon her shoulders "We need to keep moving forward, but everything's going so annoyingly slow. Makes me uneasy".
"To be honest, that's how I felt at first, desperate to go out and do our job, face what we were used to, but nothing is the same as before, not our enemies, not even ourselves" she referred to everyone, and that also included this side of him none but Elia had seen, which he might have ignored but Hange's tone was far from her usual mocking "Our lives and world was complicated long before learning what's out there, however, for this reason, we must watch our steps, maybe this time try to seek peace or a truce, which I know you don't like, nor do I, because I want make them pay for taking them away, but as Commander, I can't do that. And if it's the contrary and war is all we can expect, we must prepare carefully" even though she seemed a bit dejected, the resolve in her eye was really inspiring… not that he'd ever tell her, of course "We don't know what's happening on the other side but I'm sure is no good, considering there's no sign of an imminent attack, so rushing things ain't wise" the woman put her hand on his shoulder, both reassuring and cautionary "Be patient, Levi. It's only two weeks left before we're back outside".
"Never thought I'd hear you talking about prudence" he scoffed "Is good to see some of Moblit's good sense had stuck with you".
The comment got her smiling, and then laughing but none of the others found that weird, so they just kept walking. By the time she was done, she gave a mild squeeze to his shoulder and let go, but the smile remained.
"If we start listing the things we never thought ourselves capable of, I'm pretty sure I'd win" Hange joked, letting a titter escape at the way his eyes darkened "Ease down. I'm just saying" she was promising she wouldn't mention a thing, what little she knew "Just don't assume I'm blind. I lost an eye, literally, but the other works just fine and I can see something's off with you" unfortunately, she was right. Fooling her was an exhausting endeavor "Actually, I was hoping your trial would be busier".
The soldier took the hint. Nevertheless, despite Elia and him weren't together anymore, revealing her identity was still not in his plans.
"Only military personnel were allowed in there" he said, giving her a side eye to state the obvious.
"Uh huh!" the brunette's exclamation startled them all, for which she briefly turned to the brats to assure it was nothing. But when she turned back, she discreetly closed the gap in between them, so nobody else could hear "Sorry. I was just happy to confirm you're no widower… meaning, she was no soldier" the silliest smile showed up then, as if she'd won something.
"It no longer matters" he retorted, dryly.
"Mmm that attitude leads me to draw unfavorable conclusions" Hange muttered, pouting afterwards but then adopted a thoughtful expression that soon ended up with her hands on her head "Not fair, man! I was burning the candle at both ends to save your neck today so you could give her the good news, celebrate, you know?"
"Again. It doesn't matter" his apathetic tone warned her not to keep pushing the subject or he'd go.
"Right. Then let's have a toast in our dear friend's honor for helping us even now" she fortunately took the hint and realized they'd broken up or something, so teasing wouldn't help when he was trying to cope with this sort of grief "Erwin the lifesaver".
"I'm not surprised, not at all" the soldier muttered, more to himself than anything.
"Keeping an ace up his sleeve was always his style, wasn't it?" she said and smiled again, calmed, and grateful "I swear I still cannot believe he worked this out long before anything happened. Sometimes I wonder if he was a wizard or something".
"Wizardry doesn't exist, three-eyes. Scams on another hand… getting the hang of them it's easy" he clarified, getting into this comfortable conversation "And in his case, putting his brains to work was his specialty, so I guess he just pictured all possible outcomes from that mission".
"Oh, reminding them that if it wasn't for you, we'd never got our hands on that syringe, was epic!" she was grinning but then went back to serious mode "You see, I've learnt tons of things. For example, you know I was very mad at you for choosing the kid over him, but reading Erwin's journals helped me see how he saw things, and our friend truly considered Armin to be the brightest of us all" she peeped behind them, to the group of chatty teenagers now discussing what they'd eat, completely oblivious to their exchange "We wouldn't have gone this far without him. True, Eren's appearance was a major milestone, but it was the kid who figured almost everything past that. Not you, not me, not even Erwin".
"He said all that, huh?" the soldier muttered, glad to have learnt this regardless not regretting his decision that day.
"Yeah, and thinking things thoroughly, if it hadn't been like that, those two never would have been the same" he knew she was talking about Mikasa and Eren, still recalling their desperation that day "Which might have turned them against us, so I'm at peace with your decision now".
Levi scoffed to himself for what she'd just said, feeling a tad better; Hange had been tremendously bitter about this, so having her approval meant having her trust back. Besides, the reassurance of letting Erwin have his final rest from all this felt righter than ever.
Immersed as he was in his thoughts, the man paid not much attention to where they headed, until the brunette's lively squeak brought him back, leaving him speechless.
"We're here!" she announced to the seven open-mouthed people with her.
They were right in front of the same bar he confronted Kenny, except its appearance had considerably changed. How did he know? His excellent sense of direction never missed, so he'd hardly forget where all had happened that day.
"Looks great, doesn't it!?" she exclaimed with her usual zeal, enjoying their reactions.
Without a doubt, it had been expanded. Instead of that old swing door at the entrance, there was now a large oak double dark-red door, clearly more difficult to pass through considering how thick and heavy they looked. There were far more windows than then, and all were barred with some sort of decorative shapes, surely to prevent anyone from entering or leaving through them.
Not that these work with me anyways… he thought, aware of his strength and how he could even knock down the wall if he wanted. Still, it was a smart choice to scare others away, like thieves constantly lurking around.
"Why here?" he asked. Erwin and Hange were the only ones who heard what happened in there, although only the first in detail. He couldn't help it; he had to explain where he got the intel about the MPs plans from a conversation he hadn't intended to hear.
"It was the first we got, and from the very owner of the establishment" she said, handing him the letter addressed to the heroes of Shiganshina, inviting them to a lunch or dinner there "I'm inclined to believe your unforgettable exploits here increased its popularity, and changed quite a few things, so I was obviously hooked".
"Might as well have invited us earlier" he snorted at the tubby's stinginess, handing the piece of paper back to her.
"Come on, man! Bankrupt is no good for any business" she chortled at his outrage, and then attempted to walk in there, only she stopped and turned towards him, having remembered something "Ah, if you don't want to spend the whole afternoon here, I suggest you say nothing to them yet".
Having said that and seeing him eye-rolling, the soldier simply made her turn and pushed her inside before beckoning the kids to follow them with a mild tilting of his head.
As soon as they entered, the seven of them expressed their astonishment and excitement in different ways, from whistling to little jumps, but no one seemed happier than Sasha, now grabbing Hange's arm while crying. He, on another hand, paid more attention to his surroundings, observing not just the exterior had changed; the old bar where he'd covered himself no longer existed, nor did the shelf full of liquor behind it. In their stead were now paintings, and the wainscoting on the wall was all about the different utensils used in a kitchen, carved on the wood, to create a warm atmosphere, perfect for families and stuff. However, what caught his attention the most was the wall at the farthest west of the room, on which the three military insignias hung. The roses from the Garrison were, as usual, in the middle and a little higher, while the Wings of freedom located to its left, but the curious thing was a very familiar shotgun hanging right in the center of them.
Gotta be shitting me… he though once getting closer, noticing it was the same he shot Kenny with, displayed as a trophy. He confirmed it when he saw a note next to it, indicating the weapon had decorative purposes only.
"Always making an impression, huh?" Hange teased as she stood next to him to contemplate the object "That sure is a warning for you, my friend" she chuckled at his baffled expression.
"Tch" with that, he turned around and made his way back to where the brats waited for one of the two waitresses on sight, both at the opposite side of the restaurant, taking other clients' orders.
As he walked, he focused on the sanitary conditions of the establishment, deciding it was decent enough but sadly not prone to get any better by the end of the day.
"Thank goodness there isn't that many people aside from us" the brunette commented, not far behind him, beckoning all to follow her to another spot to catch their eye.
"Not surprising when is not noon yet" he pointed out, checking on the clock right above what he assumed, should the kitchen door, indicating it was 11:18 AM "Just wait and see. In two hours, this place is gonna be full".
Hange had been observing which table could work for them as she listened to him, but before she could respond, she got interrupted by a girl of maybe the same age as the brats, who'd come from somewhere else.
"Good morning, officers" being three inches shorter than him and wearing her raven hair in such an over-proportioned bun made her look incredibly ridiculous, as if she had an extra head on top of her own "How may I help you today?"
That question led him to believe she thought they were on duty or something, but it was the tone that bothered him the most; with a pitchy voice, she tried sounding kind but the exasperation on her face gave the girl away, hinting wanted them gone. Not that he cared, anyways. Nevertheless, the instant Hange had been about to reply, he saw her eyes set on his friend's coat, at the emblem there more specifically, then the eye-patch, and her whole demeanor changed to what he'd describe as freaking out once paying better attention to the rest of crew. By the time she set eyes on him, her eyes widened and without saying anything else, the girl ran towards kitchen door as if running for her life.
"What the hell…" a bewildered Jean blurted out, scratching the back of his head.
"That definitely breaks the record" Connie declared "Dashing off like that after seeing the captain… And he didn't even say a thing!" the boy's stupid joke made most of them laugh.
"Where did she go?!" Sasha squealed, throwing herself onto the nearest chair and leaned on the table, holding her head in her hands "I'm so hungryyyyy" she cried and then her forehead hit the wooden surface, as if she had dropped dead right there.
"Somebody get her up before she starts drooling" the soldier said, with an I told you kind of look to Hange, who simply found this amusing.
With a forceful exhalation, Mikasa approached the girl, grabbed her hand and put her arm around her neck to carry her, as effortlessly as if it'd been him doing it.
"What do we do now?" Jean asked, fearing the other clients might think they were all nuts but seemed relieved when he realized there weren't many people in there yet.
"What's wrong, Jeanboy?" Eren's tone was undoubtedly the teasing kind "Don't tell me you're getting shy now".
Had he not known picking on each other helped on the brats' recovering, he'd have been super annoyed. And kicking buts.
"Shut up, and don't be such a chump" the other boy responded, with red ears "Making scenes in a public place is stupid, especially when people had just started to like us for real".
"Guys, why don't we take a seat?" their leader offered, grabbing Eren's arm before he could reply and force him to kick their asses for misbehaving; she's seen the warning in his eyes, but the kids totally missed it.
"Shall we put those tables together?" Armin enquired, visibly in a better mood than at HQ, to which he responded with an affirmative nod.
Connie and Jean joined him on the task when they reached the perfect spot for a larger group, to the eastern side of the establishment, and where no curious eyes could peep on them from outside. Eren and the others placed three chairs on each side and one at both ends, for Hange and him to occupy. And whilst all of them had taken their seats, before doing the same, Levi slid the tip of his index finger across the surface of the table and analyzed it with squinted eyes, ignoring his group had been holding their breaths, waiting for his approval, hoping it was clean enough so he wouldn't have them leave, which thankfully wasn't the case.
"Look Sasha, someone else is coming back… And she's carrying something!" Connie grabbed the girl's chin to help her lift her head. He then turned it slightly so she could see past him. In no time, Sasha's whole body reacted, like a hound who'd glimpsed on its prey, ready to jump.
"Ugh!" Jean complained, but when he looked at him, he smiled idiotically, pretended nothing happened.
As Levi looked away, he did not miss how he'd put a handkerchief in the girl's hand, so she cleaned the puddle her drooling had left on the table. Only it was Armin who quickly took the piece of fabric and did the job himself, not wanting for the waitress to see that.
"Good morning, officers" a tall girl, with curly blonde hair tied in a proper ponytail greeted them. She was clearly in her early twenties despite attempting to make herself look older with makeup.
Regardless of the tray she was carrying, she bowed with much respect, making the boys blush and look elsewhere, quite nervously. He assumed it was due to that movement pronouncing the neckline of her blouse, preventing them from speaking rubbish in their trying to impress her. Unsurprisingly, the girl showed no trace of irritation, surely for being used to that kind of reaction from teenage brats and ignoring them was part of the job.
"Please, excuse my colleague for disappearing like this. She started working here rather recently" she explained "She was instructed to notify us of your arrival, so that's why the reaction, but on behalf of all our staff, it is an honor you accepted the boss's invitation" she smiled at all of them with irrational friendliness, at least to him "My name is Rosie, and I'll be happy to be your waitress today".
"No, no, no. The honor is all ours, miss" Hange replied, beckoning them to tilt their heads at her, which he didn't do but the girl didn't seem to mind "It had been a little troublesome to gather most of the group, so that's why it took us a while to come. But thank you all for this kind invitation".
"It's a pleasure, Commander" the girl assured and proceeded to place the tray on the corner, to his left, and in a matter of seconds, the table had eight glasses on, as well as two jugs that judging by their smells, one contained lemonade whereas the other grape juice, and right in between them, there were now two medium-sized bread baskets, full of steaming bread rolls, clearly just baked.
All the while the waitress had been placing things on this improvised table for eight, Levi barely paid any attention to her cheerful exchange with Hange, all thanks to the smell of the bread; it was impossible not to reminisce about the moments of peace and intimacy shared at Elia's. No matter how he tried getting her out of his head, his heart never seized to long for them. Damn, how he missed her!
"Please make yourself at home. I'll go get the menus and be back to take your order" Rosie said, once again dedicating them a mild reverence, and this time he noticed she deliberately avoided looking at him, making him wonder if it was out of nerves or fear; whichever was, it bothered him.
"Hope she's not another lunatic" he commented to Hange once the girl vanished through the kitchen doors, purposely ignoring the way brats had begun gulping down the food "I'm warning you, if anyone here ask me to write my name down on whatever, like yesterday at the market, you deal with it, or I won't be held responsible for my actions".
His words got everyone snickering, surely because they remembered how irritated he'd been after that. Obviously, he hadn't agreed to the stupid request of signing the man's cane. Instead, breaking in half, right to the fool's face, had been better, preventing anyone else not to dare trying asking a thing like that.
"Don't worry, man. Rumor has it you dislike those things so no one gonna come any close. Tho you gotta admit the man was really gutsy to ask" the brunette assured, and the rest of kids nodded approvingly "Rosie, no idea what's up with her but if anything, I think she still fears you a little" she was obviously referring to the fight with Kenny, and that made more sense; the fact that he didn't remember her didn't mean she did not witness the whole thing "Just try to be nice, Levi. They've been nothing but that so far, so keep that on mind, will ya?"
"They seem like good people" Sasha suddenly joined the exchange, bursting with happiness as she sniffed what was probably her third bun in less than two minutes "And this tastes magnificently!" saying that with her mouth full earned her a disapproving look, so she swallowed the food way too abruptly, choking a little.
"She's the nicest girl I've seen" Connie also intervened, taking a long sip of the grape juice Armin had just served for Sasha to ease her coughing "Rosie…" he mumbled, playing with the glass, imitating an older man drinking wine "She's as pretty as a flower, don't you agree?" the dreamy tone and red cheeks only exasperated him.
"If you're into flowers, try the poisonous ones first. That'll help you avoid ending up dead in a ditch, or broke after being used" he snorted, getting the entire group's attention because of the bitterness in his words "Letting yourself be fooled by appearances is one of the stupidest things to fall for".
"We get it, Levi" Hange said, with an unsure smile after what seemed like the longest minute of silence, a very awkward one "We're here to have a break, and that includes you. So let's relax a bit, okay? How about this lemonade?" she offered and poured the liquid in an empty glass Eren handed to her "Seriously man, it's very good" she promised.
The man took a deep breath and quietly shook his head to decline it, knowing he needed to calm his rage, or he'd go insane any day.
"I rather tea, so I'll wait" he said to her, glad to see she nodded in return, accepting the silent apology.
When the girl returned, carrying three copies of the menu, she handed to the first to Hange, the second to him, and last was Connie, although it should be noted that only happened because the brat stretched his arms out, so the waitress hardly had a chance to avoid him.
"Think about your choices carefully" he warned them, remind them to behave; after all, wearing his formal uniform unavoidably gave the impression that they were a delegation "And do so quick" he demanded when their whispering, asking one another what they'd have, commenced to nettle him.
Even the waitress got startled when he said that, but by the time she finished writing down everyone's order, she dared looking at him with a bit of curiosity.
"I'll be back in a few minutes, officers," she promised, bowing her head again; an attitude that bordered on the pathological if someone asked him. Hange's spark of true joy in her one eye was the one thing that kept him from saying anything "The boss is very grateful to you all, and he wanted me to reiterate that this invitation is completely on the house".
As expected, the two veterans there merely tilted their heads in gratitude and understanding, but the six teenagers were still trying to convince themselves they hadn't imagined that. As soon as the waitress left their sight, they all turned to the brunette in unison, surprised, as though having been backstabbed or something.
"Why didn't you say anything, Hange?!" Sasha cried, closing her eyes, surely imagining all kinds of dishes in her head.
"You shouldn't complain, dude" Connie griped, drinking another glass in one sitting, leaving it on the table a bit brusquely, to the point even he jumped, fearing a reprimand but when he glanced in his direction, all he found was a tired Levi pretending not noticing "How come you got to order two main courses?" he then went back to Sasha, scrutinizing "Did you really not know about this?"
"Of course not. I only ordered two because Hange told me I could do it when we left the martial court" Sasha clarified.
"Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!" again, all the brats turned towards Hange, making the most ridiculous faces he'd ever seen, something between accusatory and pleading.
"Sorry guys. It's the only thing that occurred to me when she told me she felt ill for skipping breakfast for having to testify" said the woman, shrugging while giving them an apologetic smile.
That managed to appease them, since everyone remembered the trauma the girl developed thanks to Shadis' retaliations.
"It's okay, Hange. Leaving you broke wasn't an option anyways" Armin said, laughing shyly, looking also a little livelier than in the past weeks.
"Better not ask if it's possible to change my order, right?" Connie whispered to Jean, the only one who seemed pleased with himself, or so said the proud smirk on his face.
"See what happens for hanging out longer than needed around this one?" the boy said, darting his eyes to Eren and back to Connie.
"If you don't shut up, I'll push the freaking blood sausages down your throat…" the brat looked daggers at him, and nearly said something he'd regret but Armin stopped him when he covered his mouth with his hands, somewhat embarrassed.
"Please, guys, don't start now" he asked, glimpsing his way. He flinched at his creased forehead "All of our meals sound delicious, so let's enjoy them peacefully, alright?"
"We weren't the ones picking up a fight" Mikasa pointed out, making Jean gulp and go pale.
"And let's be honest. What horse-face ordered sounds gross" Eren grimaced with disgust.
Jean had been about to snark something but when he noticed his demeanor and the disapproving thin line his lips formed, warning them how close he was to losing his patience, the kid refrained himself from it though not from mumbling whatever to himself, and then drank a whole glass of lemonade in one sitting. When he left the glass on the table, he decided to look away, taking on an air of indifference while staring at another waitress tending customers in there.
"Urrr… sir? Would you mind trading my pork chops for your steak?" the shaved-headed boy asked out of the blue. When he turned to him, he couldn't believe he was giving him the puppy eyes, as if that would work.
"Didn't I told you to choose carefully?" the man muttered, no need to verbalize his refusal.
"Come one, guys. Cheer up" the brunette stepped in, trying to infect everyone with her high spirits "We can always come here some other time".
"Not for free though" the man stressed out when their faces lit up and eyes glowed excitedly "You must bust your asses for it".
"What our dear Captain says is that he might surprise us all with a special invitation if you do your best" Hange joked, giving Mikasa a playful punch in the shoulder. Nonetheless, the girl merely looked back at her with the same poker face he had "Okay, is just an idea. I could invite you as well someday, you know?"
"If there ever comes a day when the boss takes us out for dinner or something, I swear I'll drink my own piss" Connie whispered to Jean, though with his extraordinary senses, Levi heard every single word.
"Man, you're gross!" Jean complained, to what the other simply smirked when he saw him shiver in repulse.
"Having fun, aren't we?" Levi addressed the kid, raising a menacing brow to let him know he heard "If you don't zip that hole you got for a mouth until the food is here, I'll have you doing that for real".
"Aye, sir!" stiffed in his spot, Connie adopted an unusual serious expression as he frantically nodded to show obedience, biting his tongue not to react at Jean and Sasha's silent mocking.
"Man, it smells good in here…" expressed their commander, closing her eye while sniffing the air around them. When she opened it, it was him she gazed at, somewhat thoughtful "How come we never came here with the others?" she was referring to the veterans, of course.
"You ask the wrong person" Levi wasn't really the type who got easily dragged anywhere, unless it was her and Erwin; watching the others get all wasted was such a bother, Gelgar especially "In any case, this used to be a bar, not a restaurant. That might explain it".
"Mike would have loved this place" the woman assured, most likely thinking how intense that fool got whenever a rare, delicious meal was involved.
"Tsk… he sure would have loved sniffing everything like the creep he was".
Hange smiled at that, unable to hide the sting of melancholy in her eyes, expressing how badly she missed those days.
Cut the crap and be honest. You miss them too… his inner self affirmed, reminding the many faces he'd fought side by side, people he'd trusted for years, now gone forever.
"Man, he adored meat! And a well-cooked one, even more" Hange shared to the whole group but then turned to him "Which you'd have known have you ever accepted our invitations. Not that there were many…" she giggled, mostly to herself, and then the corner of her mouth quirked up, looking at them "Hey, why don't we enjoy this meal in their honor?" the brunette proposed, rising her glass with infrequent solemnity when the brats agreed to it, imitating her "After all, it's only fair. We're here thanks to them so, let's give our all, guys, every single day".
Notwithstanding Levi was the only one who didn't join the toast, the mild but heartfelt nod he discreetly dedicated Hange was enough to demonstrate his full support. Nevertheless, the brunette's nod in return perturbed him a little because it was full of a gratitude he didn't deserve, to what she wasn't blind to.
"Aaaahhh, years trying to convince him finally paid off" she beamed like felons did whenever getting away with something.
"The captain really turned down a ton of delicious meals?" Sasha asked, visibly shocked.
"Indeed. So having the pleasure of his jolly company today is really a major event" a grave Hange declared, but seconds later that was replaced by childish enthusiasm "I'm so glad his social skills have improved this much" she said to all, then her hand held her chin, taking a pensive expression before casting her eye in his direction "This is big, Levi. Today's the day you've finally overcome your fear of regular people" Jean choked on his drink yet tried to disguise it with a cough.
"Being scared of something ain't the same as not standing them, you fool" the soldier clarified, ignoring the brat's misstep.
"Then I hope this place doesn't get too crowded, but we should be fine considering the prices, right?"
"Losing an eyeball really affected you, huh?" he looked askance at her, and then pointed with his finger to the whiteboard, right next to the kitchen doors. It established that, due to the reinauguration of the place, special discounts would last until the end of the month; clearly a marketing strategy to make themselves known and get more clients "Don't' count on it. Two other parties came inside since we got here actually".
"Right, right" she agreed, but then glimpsed at the clock on the front wall and back at him "Still, we're lucky it's early to most for lunch so, and there are four other waitresses currently working, so it'll be fine" the silly wink got him eye-rolling in resignation.
Soon after that, their food finally arrived, and the smell coming from it was undeniably good; potent yet not overwhelming despite the number of different dishes requested. To his relief, everyone was so eager to dig all in, that he miraculously enjoyed the pleasure of eating mostly in silence, leaving aside the exclamations of joy and couple of exchanges among the brats, to what he said nothing because such distractions helped divert his attention, trying to forget the last time he'd savored a piece of meat this juicy, especially when he'd assisted in its cooking; an event that took place several weeks ago.
"Wow! This was delicious!" Armin's voice fortunately brought him back to present. The boy had just finished a hearty carrot and cheese omelet, and even gave some to bottomless pit Sasha, who practically cried for it, and all because the thing had a spectacular smell.
"Dude, you should've at least demanded some of her shepherd's pie in return" said Connie, finally daring to speak. He looked just as happy as the other kid.
"And risk himself to end up with her teeth sank into his flesh, or worse, with a missing chunk in his arm? No way" Jean shuddered and then rubbed the scar the girl had left in his arm.
"Has anyone noticed how alike Sasha and titans are?" Mikasa joined the exchange, observing attentively the way the girl gobbled her second dish down "Look at her go. It's monstrous".
"Unlike her, titans don't eat people out of hunger but more like a reflex" Eren added, kind of lost in his own ruminations for a moment "But yeah, when comparing, their style is very much alike".
"And who could blame her when this was sooooo good!" Hange uttered, with a smile from ear to ear as she gently patted her own stomach. Like him, she had already finished her beef steak and mashed potatoes a few minutes ago but remained quiet until the brats got all chatty again "Could any of you be so kind to remind me writing a letter to the owner to thank him appropriately?" Armin timidly raised his hand, surely still fearing doing anything wrong but then the woman's grin broadened "In fact, we all are going to write something to express our endless gratitude for this. It's the least we can do".
Even though they weren't keen about that, the six brats, some still with their mouths full, nodded affirmatively. After all, it was a special day; the first someone had expressed their gratitude for what they did. Not that they asked for it anyways, but it was far better than those times when aside from suffering many losses, not to mention having to fight a system that didn't really believe them important, they also had to put up with people's judgement. So yes, he couldn't deny that he was glad to witness these changes he never thought possible.
By the time all eating was done, they waited a couple of minutes before calling one of the waitresses nearby, just for the sake of letting the food go down. And so, Hange found herself talking to the same girl who'd greeted them first, and told her they'd be leaving soon, which she timidly paid attention to and then ran off to the kitchens, again.
"Was it necessary to inform of that?" he raised the question.
"Of course, it was!" the brunette exclaimed, slightly scandalized "It'd be extremely rude for us to just go when we've been treated this kindly".
"If you say so…" he muttered, being that the sole reason why he hadn't gotten up.
But shortly after that, Rosie, their waitress, approached the table and unnecessarily bowed to them before speaking.
"Officers, may I ask a little more of your time?" she began, putting her arms behind her back while going from one face to the next as she hoped for a positive response "The boss arrived recently, and asked me to tell you that he'd love to greet you himself".
"Oh, don't even mention it, young lady!" his friend jumped in, eager about the prospect of being able to express her own gratitude to the old man "We'll wait right here" she informed, and then asked with inquisitive eye and a childish smile "Am I wrong to assume you're related to him?"
"You're not, Commander" the girl smiled back "He's my uncle".
"It figures 'cause whenever you mention him, I've picked up pride and admiration in your tone" as soon as Hange said it, the girl's cheeks got a bit red, but she didn't try to hide it.
"His wife and him are my only family. They're good people" Rosie shared, and excused herself to get back to the kitchens, surely happy to deliver their acceptance.
That's how, ten minutes later, he saw the same, mostly bald, man with his silly mustache, coming from the same door, wearing a suit but thankfully not that ridiculous red bowtie around his plump neck.
Despite having a stack of small dishes in his hands, the man stopped to hold the door to let someone else pass through, which turned out to be his niece, carrying what seemed to be a big rectangular glass roaster as she headed towards them.
"Ah, my dear officers, it's a pleasure to see you here" he greeted cheerfully with that squeaky voice he remembered. Levi couldn't help a small smirk at the slight nervousness when his eyes met his but immediately after diverted to Hange "Commander, I'm so glad you accepted my humble invitation. It's been some time since I sent it, so I feared you'd never come."
As soon as he said that, he asked Rosie to come closer. She placed the vessel on the table carefully, right between Connie and Jean, who, red as a tomato, remained abnormally quiet at her proximity, so much so that they couldn't possibly move an inch. Meanwhile, Eren was giving his all not to laugh for the imaginary gallantry skills they always bluffed about.
Again, Levi would have told him to knock it off but seeing that, little by little, the brat seemed to be going back to his usual idiotic self, helped easing some of his anxiety away.
Mmm you could always beat the depression out of him… the annoying voice offered, and although it wasn't wrong, he didn't enjoy that perspective.
"I was hoping you could try some of our special desserts" the old man said with hopeful eyes, interrupting his ruminations "It's one of my late mother's recipes, followed by my dear Rose" he added, making the girl blush more "Just pardon me for leaving the forks behind. My overexcitement stopped me from hearing Rosie saying I was to bring them" this time it was his ears that got all red.
"Oh boy, I know this one!" Hange got up, walked to the girl, grabbed her hands, and got way close to her face, making her uncomfortable with that ridiculous dreamy expression of hers, according to a whole red face now "Oh, you can't imagine how much I craved for this! It's been years since last time!"
Whilst his friend profusely expressed her gratitude to their hosts, the brats simply looked and shrugged at each other, unsure of stepping in, until Connie dared to ask.
"It does look nice, but what is it?" his casual way alarmed Hange but the owner of the establishment just started to laugh.
"Only the most exquisite egg custard pie you'll ever try, young man" he guaranteed, whose eyes twinkled with delight, as though he was enjoying a good memory.
The old man looked to his niece, surely beckoning her to slice it for them, and so the girl carried out the task in silence, giving generous portions for everyone, but when it came to him, he noted she hesitated for a second.
"Thanks, but I rather having more tea instead" he said, passing his portion on to Armin, the one still missing.
He observed how the girl turned to her uncle, clearly asking for some guidance, which Levi thought to be absurd, unless the man had some sort of expectation of his opinion on this treat.
"Pie is not of your liking, Captain?" the man asked, somewhat worried "How about some carrot cake, with a cup of tea, of course".
"Don't take it personal, sir" Hange intervened, waving her hands to assure him it was nothing to fret about "Levi isn't much into sweet stuff, that's all".
That wasn't entirely true. He liked those, not regularly but he did. It was just that he wasn't in the mood for it given all that had happened. He'd been incredibly bitter since the quarrel with Elia and her reckless decision, that having something like pie would now remind him of her the entire time.
"Oooh, I see" that at least got the old man nodding affirmatively before winking at his niece, who quickly retrieved the container with half of the pie gone and left "Alright, ladies and gentlemen, I'll go get the forks and leave you to enjoy your dessert. Rosie will be back with the Captain's tea shortly".
"Uhm, we understand if you have other business to attend, sir. But if that isn't the case, we'd be happy if you could join us for a little while".
Hange evidently hadn't taken his lack of enthusiasm into consideration, but Levi knew she was just being polite, so he said nothing. Even less when the rest of the lot seemed to agree to her suggestion, or that's what he got from their warm, energetic expressions anyways, although he knew that was more at the perspective of not hiving to write anything later.
"You're… you're all too kind" the old man stuttered, half embarrassed, half pleased "I'll be right back then" he said and headed to the one door in the back, the one that lead to the restrooms, and surely a storage room.
"Stop that, Sasha" Jean's voice got Levi's eyes turning her way, only because he sounded mortified, and immediately understood why.
"He wasn't bluffing, I tell ya!" she exclaimed, unaware of his mouth set in a hard line nor the scowling "Do try it, c'mon. The custard is so smooth and creamy but the crust it's all flaky… it's amazing! The tastiest dessert I've ever tried!"
"And might be the last if you don't behave, Sasha" Levi hissed when he saw her licking the side of her bloody hand "Perhaps I should fill your transfer to the stables, see if you learn something there 'cause I've seen pigs eating with more decency".
Right then, everyone's attention went towards the owner of the restaurant, carrying one of the old wooden stools that used to be line up in front of the bar. Believing he wasn't looking, Sasha took advantage of the distraction to lick what was left of pie in her thumb and then sat straight, pretending nothing had happened.
"My niece is on her way" he said, barely daring to look at him as he placed the object in between Hange and Mikasa "Uhm, where were we?"
As foreseen, his friend and boss immersed herself on one trivial, boring conversation, asking about the business and the whole rebuilding process, including the man's reasons to change the place, which he responded in all earnest, trying not to glance in his direction. Without a doubt, the experience during the uprising had scared the shit out of him, yet he still somehow gave the impression that he owed him something, or he wouldn't be trying so hard to please him and be this kind to all of them regardless of his obvious nervousness around him.
Without a doubt, a family style restaurant was safer than a bar, so it made sense the man decided to use whatever money he was given as compensation for the damages to create another environment, one that wouldn't remind constantly him of his traumatic experience.
"I'm very sorry you had to go through something like that, sir" the brunette said when she saw the affliction in his face; suddenly the talk took an unexpected turn, far from joviality "Those were difficult days for us too" she shared, patting him gently on the shoulder "And I daresay even lucky for living to tell the story".
"That's right, Commander: it was horrible. In all my years owning a bar, I never witness anything but a few fistfights outside and late at night. The normal stuff, you know?" the old man slightly trembled with fright "This place has like the greatest location, right in the city center and surrounded by the three military premises, so I never had to worry. Especially when many officers used to come here regularly".
"Sir? Uhm, you may tell us about it, if you want" Armin suggested, red as a tomato and without much conviction but as always, he suspected the kid was trying to help "I've read that sharing distressing experiences with others could help to overcome them" he explained.
Before anyone could say a thing, all but him turned to see Rosie coming. The girl stopped right to his left, and out of the corner of his eyes he saw she'd brought a tray containing two cups of tea, a honeypot, forks, and a small plate full of cookies.
"Excuse me, Captain" she said, also nervy about looking him in the eye "We hope you like these. They're oatmeal cookies" the waitress placed one steaming cup in front of him and the small plate right next to it.
"Thanks" was all he said, gesturing he needed no honey.
Having delivered that, the girl then distributed the forks to the rest, leaving for last the other cup, surely meant for her uncle, sitting at the opposite side of the table. Right then Levi perceived someone's arm reaching out discreetly to steal a cookie, but the menacing glare he dedicated Connie for agreeing to Sasha's petition got those two lowering their heads and concentrated in their slice of pie.
"Thank you, my dear" he saw the man smiling at her and then at Armin "I think this young man may be right. At least, it makes sense, given it's part of the strange events involving you as well. But I can only share what I remember because I... well, I fainted when I thought Captain Levi had been killed when he left through the window" his nervous laughter tried to hide the fear he hadn't forgotten about "Rosie knows the rest".
Surprised about the unexpected request, the girl exchanging a look with her relative and then Hange, whose eye was fixed upon her like a psycho, though she surely took that as mere interest, so she agreed to it.
"That'd be wonderful!" Hange assured with a broad smile, then suddenly looked appalled "Not that this experience was wonderful, of course" she added with an apologetic smile, trying to control her excitement, to what the old man simply nodded in understanding.
Right after that, and before the waitress even attempted to move to get a chair, Jean and Connie stood up at the same time, but the second tripped on his way out and so it was Jean who won their stupid contest for the girl's attention, grabbing the closest empty chair and put it to his left, between him and Levi.
Knowing this sort of ludicrous conduct would be on display, the soldier found himself once again rolling his eyes on the same morning, tired but lacking the energy right now to go against them when the owners of the restaurant minded not.
The old man seriously had no idea how to narrate things coherently, or he was trying to hard maybe, but starting with some ominous dream he'd had the night before was a big no: boring up to a point where he was beginning to feel sleepy. Yet the others apparently thought otherwise, for true focus was all he found in their faces.
Might be because you were there… his inner voice stated the obvious, reminding him he should take this opportunity to make sure nobody connected Elia to him, which managed to truly pique his interest, so taking a sip of his favorite drink, the soldier listened attentively.
"I mean, no regular people could have survived an ambush like that, but the Captain sure is a cut above the rest" the man said, enjoying the different expressions of amazement from his tiny audience. But despite trying to praise Levi, his stoicism prevented him from insisting on it "Which is as far as I remember because I passed out".
He looked to his niece then, as in that was her queue to continue, so taking a deep breath, the girl let the air out slowly and commenced.
"When my uncle collapsed, I thought he'd died" the girl began, thankfully not focusing on the fight but what happened afterwards "Yet he was only unconscious, which was a fortune, because I don't think his heart could have handled the later shock at that man's behavior, the one with the hat. You cannot imagine how scared we were after the Captain managed to escape".
"Really? I was under the impression that they left after Levi got away" Hange discreetly glanced at him, silently asking what they were talking about, to what he barely shook his head no, letting her know he wasn't aware of that "That's what the report said at least" she was undoubtedly interested in learning more about everything, and though it bothered him to admit it, so was he.
The details of that encounter were completely unknown to him because Elia refused to tell him every time he asked, making him wonder why. Did she not trust him? No. Within each day and the growing closeness between them, he soon realized she just didn't want to sully his uncle's name even further; after all, the woman comprehended the complexity of their relationship, that he'd always be his father figure, so she didn't want to be part of the reasons to resent him, especially now that he was gone. It was so obvious that it made him sick, because he knew Kenny better than anyone, the crimes he committed, the games he liked to play with his prey, so to simply imagine it was him precisely who may have taken her life...
That's why she didn't tell you, the voice answered, reminding him one of the many conversations held with Elia while lying in bed, when he opened up and told her about his childhood. A day when she also got to stun him with the idea that fucking Kenny actually cared about him.
Elia was no fool, and she wouldn't redeemed Kenny's sins for, perhaps, the one selfless act in his life: saving him. But she certainly thanked the criminal for it, and the importance he had to him had been enough reason for her to respect his memory.
"Sadly, no. Some of them remained here, messing around, terrorizing us" the girl responded "If it weren't for one of our regular customers, officer Holt, from the Military Police…"
As soon as the girl mentioned the institution, the brats exchanged intrigued looks, taking a small break from their dessert to pay extra attention, just because they made some MP allies over the same days.
"… and his girlfriend, who happened to be a healer, I think. And if it weren't for them, I don't know but we, most likely, may not have lived".
Levi's blood boiled like it hadn't in a long time after hearing that, he couldn't help it. Why the hell did they give that vibe? Did that imbecile try something before he'd landed there? Fuck! No matter how Elia felt about the moron, the notion of another man daring to want her was maddening. She was his.
Nope, not anymore… his insidious self pointed out. He could even hear it laughing at his misery. What do you think's gonna happen now that you're history? I bet he'll try to get closer once he finds out…
No matter what he did, he couldn't just shut down this morbid voice inside his head, torturing him day and night for his decision, with the sole purpose of driving him insane. Either that or change his mind, which wasn't an option, now more than ever, given how upsetting it had been for her to see him last time.
"Officer Holt dealt with the clients wanting to leave all together while those rascals were still surrounding the bar. He convinced them to wait inside until the Garrison showed up, and in the meantime, his partner helped me with my uncle" Rosie explained, glancing towards her boss with caring eyes "She told me he'd just passed out, so after checking him and improvising a pillow out of her own jacket, she assured he'd be alright".
"Her name was Elia, wasn't it?" Hange intervened, with a witty smile and pride in her gaze when the waitress nodded, surprised "I read the report Pixis' men filled, and both of their statements. Not that they said much except claimed they decided to stay with you until the danger was over" the brunette commented, facing the old man beside her this time.
"But it wasn't like that" the girl intervened, with some sort of urgency in her eyes. She hadn't been this intense throughout the rest of her story, but having learnt Hange knew Elia seemed to convince her she was doing right on telling them about this "She... I seriously don't know what would have happened if she hadn't been here to negotiate a way to get us out".
That had been a shocker to everyone, he noticed in their faces. In fact, Jean's was even more notorious considering the puckered face in concentration, and then his eyes widening, confirming the brat had just realized he also knew that person. What Levi didn't know was that it hadn't been her name what rang the bell in the boy's head, but rather her actions, how she not once seemed intimidated by him despite his awful humor that day, something he might have heard when Jean whispered that to Connie but the magnitude of his own astonishment and annoyance prevented it.
The hell you were thinking, woman?! He shouted at her in mind, outraged at her clear neglect of herself. That's not how people survive, damn it!
You forget she didn't grow up like you, rat... out of the blue, Kenny's voice stepped up in his head, using that usual derisive tone, reminding him of those nights when he'd just started to know her, the stories about her family, what they did for a living. He knew his mentor wasn't showing this to provide comfort or anything; had he been alive, he never would have stopped rubbing in the vast difference between them, just to emphasize his unworthiness. A rat like him with a decent woman… it'd have been the best kind of sick joke to him.
But in all truth, those memories helped him understood she never could have turned a blind eye to someone in need to just to save herself, not like he had to do uncountable times when he was a mere brat, avoiding fights or responsibilities he had nothing to do with, in order to be left alone. No. For better or worse, Elia was not like that, and that selflessness of hers had been one of the many things he admired about her, only fear had stopped him from seeing clear.
"To be honest, I imagined it wasn't that simple" Hange's words brought him to the present "What I don't understand is how she accomplished that".
"You see… she…"
The girl told them everything, starting with the hag that was Kenny's right-hand, the way Elia conducted a deal to help them if they let the people go unharmed. And if he thought he'd been agitated before, he should have seen coming how worse things would get once she narrated her confrontation with Kenny himself, who returned inside the bar complaining about his men taking too long. The soldier forced himself to do his best not to break the fragile teacup in his hand during it, hiding his tension behind the mechanical chewing of the cookies he hadn't considered having when the girl described his mentor urging the healer to take his knife and cut his throat.
Clever. At least she knew the real chances… his uncle's voice showed up again, laughing at his own comment, like he often did.
Even so, all Levi could feel was relief to find out she refused playing his games, one that would have definitely cost her life. He wasn't entirely sure if it had been her good senses, or perhaps her principles as a healer what influenced her choice; whatever it was, he was just glad she made a good call. Still, he couldn't help clenching his teeth like crazy to control his rage when the waitress moved onto the part when, after she refused to amuse Kenny, he commanded one of his dogs to seize her, which ended with Elia's dumbass friend getting knocked out, attempting to help her.
It was clear that, having failed on getting the desired reaction from his freaking game, Kenny went for outright intimidation when he put the blade of his dagger to her neck. That's how she got that cut under the bandage he saw that same night, hidden in the shadows. And though it was insignificant, that wound represented the very notion that, no matter what he did, he held no power over Elia's destiny, nor when or how she would die. It could happen any time in the quiet of her home, in the middle of the night while drifting off, with him and his enemies a thousand miles away, and there'd be nothing in the world that would make him feel better once learning about it. Someone like her ceasing to exist was among the worst things to him, not only because he loved the woman but because he was beginning to understand that, like him, she preferred sacrificing her life for something she believed in, for those he was surrounded by, his brave brats and his one living friend. All fighting for the same cause her little sister surrendered her life for.
And you want to stop her from precisely doing what her heart desires...
Once again, and way sooner than he thought, he faced the same dilemma: accepting the will of someone he deeply appreciated, fighting his own selfishness telling him not to.
"Uhm, Miss? I may have misunderstood something, but didn't you say that the lady got you all but your uncle evacuated?" Armin's inquisitive tone interrupted his dark thoughts and turbulent emotions "How do you know all this if you weren't there?"
"When they let me go, I turned around and came back" she confessed, somewhat fearful but not repentant "I know this neighborhood like the palm of my hand so, taking streets that were no longer patrolled since they went in pursuit of the captain, I entered through the old wine cellar that used to be connected to the kitchen. I saw everything through a small vision lite".
"You mean, you wasted the chance to live provided by that person at the expense of her own" Levi's tongue betrayed him, and the worst was that Hange noticed his annoyance in the accusatory tone.
"No sir. It's not that" Rosie denied vehemently, seeking for support in her uncle's gaze before answering.
"We kept two more shotguns at the back of the bar" the old man said, admitting something that may not have been legal "As precaution, of course".
"Yes. That's why I came back and grabbed one" this time, the girl lowered her eyes a bit uneasy, but when she raised her face, all he found was honesty in it "I was going to stay with them, but she insisted I should leave. She said it was very likely they'd use me as a hostage and that would turn into a disadvantage for her, so I obeyed. However, it was for that very reason that I decided to return" she uttered with determination. "She was taking a huge risk for us, strangers, so I couldn't leave her completely unprotected. Actually, I almost pulled the trigger when that man put the dagger to her throat, but judging by his odd behavior, I noted he didn't seem wanting to kill her... making her cry or beg was more like it. Luckily, as soon as they received word that the Garrison was about to arrive, they finally left without harming anyone. Not mortally at least".
"By the time I woke up, the Garrison was already here, taking their statement. And though the lady was a little angry about Rosie's choice, she still thanked her for not abandoning us" her uncle added, smiling proudly at the girl "After that, we went with the two of them to the hospital and haven't seen them around since" the disappointment in his tone expressed the sadness of surely being unable to repay them somehow for what they did.
"As far as I know, they're both fine, sir" the brunette assured, happy to see sincere relief in the man's demeanor "Thank you very much for trusting us with this part of the story. Believe me. It means a lot".
Of course, because it only reinforces your desire to see her among us, Levi retorted in his head, feeling more tired than ever.
With everything that had happened and on top of his constant struggle, the insomnia had only intensified since he walked out on Elia; the little sleep he sometimes had was mostly nightmares.
"Please, Commander, if you see them, let them know they are more than welcome here" the girl next to him professed, holding her hands as if she were praying.
"No problem" Hange winked at her and that's how the conversation soon took another turn, back to trivial things, like a never-ending praising to the dessert he declined.
By the time they finally walked out of there, the soldier once again paced up a little and got ahead of his group, depleted of energy, and wishing the solitude of his chambers, especially after having sat there longer than expected thanks to everyone saying yes when asked if they would like seconds.
"Was it necessary to go that far?" he suddenly got Hange's arm around his shoulders. When he looked to the side, the jolly smile he hadn't seen in a while stopped him from shaking her off "It wasn't that bad, Levi".
"I gave them a fair warning earlier. Whether they listen, it's up to them but I gotta discipline those who don't. We won't be around forever and you know it, Hange" he replied, foreseeing they all would have to lead teams someday, and so far, only Jean and Armin showed promise.
"Falling asleep on the table is not a crime, man" the brunette chuckled and then slightly bent her head over, staring at him with suspicion, yet he decided to simply keep walking with his eyes on the road, showing nothing "Hope you noticed you scared the poor man when you pretty much imposed him on having Sasha washing dishes for the rest of the day. I nearly cracked up when he thought you weren't serious" as soon as she said that and laughed, he couldn't help the line appearing between his brows.
It was no surprise that having stuffed herself like Sasha did got her dozing right there. He wouldn't have minded had she been quiet, but the snoring and drooling on the table finally riled him up.
"Washing dishes hardly is a punishment" he objected. He gladly would have done the same had that helped keeping his mind busy "Besides, she's not alone".
Despite having tried behaving his best the whole time there, Connie was stupid enough to burst out laughing when he sent the girl straight to the kitchen, not without having warned her that if any food went missing there, she would starve for the rest of the week.
"Yeah, that's true" Hange commented and looked behind, to the currently smaller group of teenagers following them, whispering among themselves carefully. They were still not that far from the restaurant so their boss could perfectly send them back "I'm sure you know the boy did it on purpose not to leave her alone".
"Tch" Levi retorted, well aware of that. He simply allowed it because the girl was probably the only family Connie would have from now on. The brat was always making a fool of himself, but deep down, he was trying his best to cope with his own shit and the mess-up situation of his mother.
"What a day, huh?" the brunette muttered, letting go of him, moving her hands to her pockets "Fun and interesting, don't you think?" the gesture and words put him on the alert, because there was a hint of secretiveness in her tone.
"How come?" he dodged the question, feigning indifference, with his eyes to the dark clouds not that far that promised one long, rainy night.
"Come on! I'm sure that sharp mind of yours made you realize the woman they were talking about was the same who helped Moblit and me. The one I introduced you to back at the orphanage, remember?"
Levi kept a straight face as he walked without making a sound for like a whole minute, still pretending he couldn't care less about the topic, an attitude Hange never took personally. After all, he did that regularly.
"I know is no big deal to you but I'm glad I met her".
Sure, no big deal at all… his own inner voice said with sarcasm while his friend gave a monologue he better pay attention to.
"People like that make me hopeful, you know? Being willing to risk everything for others without expecting anything in return… that's not frequent, even less from civilians" the brunette's admiring tone worried him, making him wonder if she suspected anything because he truly couldn't tell, not in the state of mind he was "It's nice having this sort of protectors who, through small but significant actions, can change many things, even inspire others to fight" there hadn't been a trace of her usual comic tone since she addressed the subject but the complete opposite, though not grave at least "I don't remember mentioning it but she'll be joining us in a few months, and to think I can rely on someone else, a trustworthy, committed person, makes me very happy. I just hope you may feel the same, Levi. So just relax around her and be yourself. I'm sure she'll grow on you too, if you give her the chance".
"Maybe. As long as she minds her own business…" was all the soldier responded, hiding how dumbstruck he'd been left by that. Did Hange know or was she just trying to pave the way towards a cordial partnership between them? God, he was a mess!
Fortunately, his response seemed to have sufficed, for the rest of the trip was all about the meeting they'd have the following morning with the candidates from other divisions, and their briefing on the following mission outside the walls in two weeks.
Hours later and in the safety of his room, wearing pants and his shirt still, Levi sat back on his chair to watch the pouring rain though his window, unable to stop thinking. Hange's words, and today's experience at the restaurant got him musing about so much he knew it'd be impossible to sleep, even less when controlling his emotions was exhausting. People hadn't yet see it, but he feared they would soon if he didn't do something.
Although that morning event at the restaurant had mostly stressed him out, it unexpectedly helped him understood Elia's determination to fight alongside them, or more like beginning to respect her choice without the influence of his own fear to lose her.
True, the woman's unbreakable faith was sometimes scary, yet it was precisely that what showed him that, despite not being trained as a soldier, she had the spirit of one true fighter, and certainly had the balls for the job. Forgetting that had been a huge insolence, especially when he claimed to love her; there couldn't be any love if there was no respect, and he'd failed by demanding her to step back and be someone else. Actually, his practical and rational self now realized he'd tried taking her freedom away, and that went against everything he thought to be fighting for.
True, Elia was obnoxiously stubborn but not ever irresponsible or reckless; her actions back in that bar proved that. And she was amazingly skilled in her trade because she trusted her own abilities, treasuring the knowledge inherited by her family; that's what she wanted to use to help them.
No matter how bloody their path got, she'd be there, and the thought finally brought him peace. So much so that it was now easy to imagine her among them. If Sasha ever tried some of her food or learn the bread, he gave them once came from her, he knew getting the girl out of the infirmary would be a pain in his ass. Connie and Jean, those two hormonal idiots would surely come along with the girl but for very different reasons; he remembered how smitten the brat had been at the hospital, so it'd be an additional pain in his neck. He'd actually have to be very careful not to break their noses for staring too much. As for those other three, he knew they wouldn't be an exception, because of her caring, heartwarming company; Armin would surely be drawn by the healer's unusual wisdom, which would hopefully help the kid to come out of his shell and be more confident. As for Mikasa and Eren, he knew the woman's natural kindness would help them feel safer, not in way to believe nothing wrong could happen but more like being exactly what she'd been to him: a safe haven, someone they could fully trust in a different way than him or Hange. And speaking of the devil, that was the trickiest part of all, because he foresaw the brunette would figure things out sooner than expected. Hiding from the world wasn't hard, but his friend was a whole other deal; even with an eye less, that creepy sixth sense of hers and the bloody curiosity would absolutely be their doom.
Aren't you forgetting she'll be close but won't be yours… his despicable side asked, and though he hated to admit it, it was right.
Victim to his own crime and ruminations, the soldier got up and moved to the window. When he got to stand right in front of it, his eyes followed a drop of water that managed to slip through the wooden frame's division, descending slowly and getting smaller as it did, to disappear before reaching the bottom. Was that an omen of his own fate concerning her? Would she consign him to oblivion within each day?
Probably, he said to himself, trying to accept it; he had no right to be any near her. He'd forsaken his feelings and half a life of joy beside her, out of measly fear.
Pathetic… he growled.
Hopeless and angry, Levi decided it was time to try sleeping, nonetheless, when he'd been about to turn, his eyes blazed with disbelief when a second drop slipped through a different spot and started to moved down. As it descended, it somehow found the same route the other followed, growing bigger once it reached where it'd vanished, and continued all his way down the glass, completing the small, stupid path.
It made no sense, but he couldn't help being stricken by the scene, as if it were another sign. Either that or maybe his soul was just desperately trying to hold on to what little hope existed that could bring her back.
I cannot believe I made it to his birthday! Yep, it's Levi's birthday today, and though it's little, this is my humble present to him and all of you.
Merry Christmas, dearies!
Namárië