A/N: And here, we finally have the next chapter to celebrate on Christmas Day, "Holly Jolly Secrets"! This one'll end in a happier note because there's a surprise in the end. Also, for those who saw it as Freak City before now, I apologize. And there's sadly gonna be a hiatus after this chapter until February 7th. I guess now, you know what chapter's coming on this date. :)
Adventure Time with Finn, Jake, & Rachel
Chapter 13: Holly Jolly Secrets
Part 1
Once upon a time, Finn and Mille were looking at a map and then at Jake and Callie, who were smiling.
"Guys... you made this?", Finn asked.
"Yeah!", Jake replied.
"And you buried the treasure right here?", Mille asked.
"Uh-huh. Right after making sure it was cleaned out of any booger germs.", Callie added before shuddering.
"Guys! You're awesome!", Finn added.
"Thanks.", Mille added.
Jake and Callie shrugged before all four started digging with their shovels.
"So cool...", Finn commented.
Time passed and Finn, Jake, Mille, and Callie were still digging. They eventually came across a brown suitcase in the dirt.
"A suitcase?! Oh, man!", Finn exclaimed as he and Jake raised the suitcase out of the dirt and onto the ground near the hole.
"I found it at the dump and then buried it without lookin' inside.", Jake explained.
"I wonder what's in it?", Mille puzzled.
To find out, they opened the suitcase and discovered inside several VHS tapes.
"Whoa. Wait a second, man. I know this case.", Finn realized.
"You do?", Callie asked.
"But how?", Mille added.
As it cut to a flashback, Finn was dancing in the Cotton Candy Forest around a few boomboxes.
"One night, while you were away at Lady's house, I was dancing in the woods...", Finn explained.
"Evil tapes! Evil!", Ice King shouted, prompting Finn to stop and run up to notice him flying away.
"Perchance I saw the Ice King doing something suspicious, so I trailed 'im to the dump, where he buried this case in the ground.", Finn explained as he followed the Ice King toward said dump.
But when he got there, like he said, Ice King was burying the briefcase into the dump.
"You're evil, tapes! Full of evil secrets! That's why I'm going to bury you where no one will ever find you... under all these boogers! Wee, hahahahaha! Wee, hahahaha!", Ice King shouted giddily, playing in said boogers.
"I waited for him to leave... but he played in those boogers for hours. I decided to come back later for the case... but I lost track of it.", Finn explained as he then left after a while before the flashback ended.
"Okay, forget I asked...", Mille said, disgusted about how the suitcase was found.
"So, that explains why it was hidden under those boogers.", Callie realized.
"Whoa! And we found it?", Jake asked.
"Mm-hmm.", Finn nodded.
Just then, there was a loud gasping noise below them. Finn, Jake, Mille, and Callie looked up and saw Rachel and Betty.
"You actually found Dad's old tapes?!", Rachel shouted in shock.
"Yeah, Rae-Rae.", Finn replied.
"Quick! Bring them here!", Rachel urged.
A moment later, Ice King's suitcase full of tapes were now resting on the grass near the big hole made by the excavation.
"What exactly is on those tapes?", Betty puzzled.
"The day Dad left me and Marcy alone to try and keep us safe, he was recording one of his last testaments as Simon while Marcy and I were helping with the sled. He was begging for you to love him again.", Rachel explained.
"Oh, Simon...", Betty said sadly.
"Heh-heh-heh. Let's have a secret screening! I'll make some fliers for it!", Jake grinned.
"And I'll go spread the word to Marceline.", Rachel said as she then flew away.
Later, Jake was hammering a flier that says, "ATTENTION—SECRET TAPE WATCHING PARTY—TODAY AT NOON—AT FINN & JAKE'S AWESOME HOUSE *ONLY FINN, JAKE, BEEMO, RACHEL, BETTY, AND MARCELINE ARE INVITED. ~THANK YOU," to a tree. He's already hammered in hundreds of these fliers.
"There. Now nobody will bother us.", Jake said.
"Jake! Jake, come on!", Finn shouted.
"I've already brought Marceline on-board!", Rachel added as she and Marceline flew into the Tree Fort while Jake ran inside.
As this happened, the words, "An Adventure Time Christmas" appeared.
"Okay. You can play this, right, BMO?", Finn asked, gesturing to the tape as Finn, Jake, Mille, Callie, Betty, Rachel, and Marceline got comfortable.
"Yes, Finn. It goes in my butt!", Beemo replied as it stood up and turned around, gesturing to the VHS tape slot on the bottom from the back.
"Oh.", Finn said.
"Well, what are you waiting for? Let's watch.", Betty responded before Finn inserted the tape.
"This is so exciting!", Jake spoke excitedly.
As soon as the video started, it showed Ice King in his bedroom.
"Hello, dear diary. Pretty good day so far. Got up bright and early and had a healthy and slimming breakfast, did fourteen minutes of cardio (and then I finally got around to)...", Ice King continued.
"Dude... what are we watchin'?", Jake asked.
"That must be my Dad's diary. On one hand, I know it's wrong to peep, but somewhere along the way, there's bound to have been something he kept from his previous life, whether he remembers or not.", Rachel replied.
"...I mean, I'm not gonna win carpenter of the year or anything, but it's a place to hang up the old toothbrush.", Ice King added in the tape.
Just then, a penguin got on Ice King's bed.
"Wenk.", the penguin spoke, walking up to the camera.
"Gunther? Hey, Gunther. Get-get away from the camera, sweetie. Papa's recording his innermost thoughts. 'Member? I explained this to you? Hey, Gunther? GUNTHER!", Ice King shouted as first Gunther rubbed his stomach and then jumped up and down on the bed.
"Wenk.", Gunther responded.
"Well, anyway, as you can see, I'm not wearing my—", Ice King began before Gunther interrupted with a...
"Wenk."
"I'm not wearing my—", Ice King began.
"Wenk wenk.", Gunther interrupted.
"Sweetie, I raised my voice because you were giving me the silent treatment. You understand?", Ice King asked.
"Wenk.", Gunther said.
"I love you.", Ice King responded.
"Can we fast-forward?", Callie asked.
"No, man, we might miss something.", Rachel responded.
"But what is there to miss in this video?", Marceline asked.
"There must be more to life than this...", Ice King sighed.
"Wenk.", Gunther piped up.
"I know. You don't like when I'm contemplative. ...C-contemplative... No, con-temp-la—Let's put on a play!", Ice King began.
"What?!", Jake and Callie began.
On the tape, Ice King was acting as Princess Bubblegum.
"Oh, Ice King! You're so cool! You take such good care of yourself! I wanna be with you!", Ice King said.
"Wenk. Wenk wenk.", Gunther spoke, pulling off the pretend-beard.
"No, Gunther, beard stays on.", Ice King said.
"Wenk.", Gunther refused.
"Gunther, I need ya to wear the beard!", Ice King urged.
"Wenk!", Gunther refused adamantly.
"Gunther!", Ice King snapped just as Rachel gasped.
"Wait a minute. Pause it, BMO.", Rachel spoke before the video froze.
"I think I've been in that one. Dad and Gunther were doing a play exactly like that when I came back home one time.", Rachel realized.
"Really?", Betty asked.
"Yeah. You should've seen them. You can tell they're trying hard to make it work.", Rachel grinned.
"That is nice. But still not the one we're looking for here.", Marceline said.
"I wanna keep watching.", Finn said.
"Okay... Well, why don't we make us some snacks?", Jake asked.
"Yeah. So we don't have to watch... this...", Callie agreed.
"Can we sit on the floor? I feel so far away from you guys!", Beemo asked.
Meanwhile
In a snowy forest in the Ice Kingdom, Gunther had an apple on his head.
"Wenk.", Gunther said.
Ice King cracked his knuckles.
"Now hold still..."
He aimed for the apple, but accidentally froze the penguin's face.
"You moved! Hey, what's this?", Ice King puzzled.
The Ice Wizard retrieved the flier and read it.
"'Secret tapes'?! I wanna watch! I'll catch ya later, Gunther!", Ice King said, taking his leave.
"Wenk!", Gunther waved.
Back at the Tree Fort, the gang were already watching another tape. On it, Ice King was throwing a party as a penguin walked off.
"Gunther, no! Gunther...", Ice King spoke, but another penguin reacted to the name. "Dance pa—"
The penguin just looked away again.
"GUNTHER!", Ice King shouted as Gunther turned to Ice King again. "Dance party!"
This time, the second penguin ran to Ice King, who danced.
At one time, Jake ate a snack as did Callie, Mille, Rachel, and Marceline. Finn tried to reach for a snack of his own, but couldn't, so Jake helped him.
"Thanks, Gunther.", Finn thanked.
Jake just chuckled and munched on his snack.
"You're Gunther.", Jake said, chuckling with Finn as Rachel, Betty, Marceline, Mille, and Callie grinned.
On the tape, the second penguin left the party.
"Oh, fine! Who needs you? More dance party for us, right, Gunther?", Ice King asked before a slow song played and Ice King blushed.
"Oh... Eh...", Ice King chuckled nervously.
"May I have this dance? Heh!", Ice King said, dancing with the penguin.
"Well, that seems funny.", Betty giggled.
"Ugh...! That video is embarrassing...!", Rachel blushed.
Suddenly, a loud banging on the door was heard on the front door.
"Someone wants to see the secret tapes!", Finn shouted.
"What? Oh, but I was so clear in my flier!", Jake groaned.
"I don't think using fliers for secret tape parties like this was a good idea to begin with, Jake.", Callie said.
"Let's peek through the window and check who it is! Maybe it's just pizza.", BMO suggested.
"Right!", Finn agreed before he and BMO ran toward the window only to be stopped.
"Wait! Wait!", Rachel and Betty urged.
"What?", the two puzzled.
"You guys are checking too loud!", Betty whispered.
"You have to be quiet.", Rachel added.
"Oh! You're right. More quietly!", Finn whispered.
BMO then turned down its volume.
"I am quieter now.", BMO whispered.
"Cool.", Jake grinned.
The group of eight then tip-toed towards the window and peeked through it. When they did, they saw Ice King knocking on the door.
"Hey, guys, it's me. Can I come in and watch the secret tapes with you? I brought some gifts!", Ice King shouted, prompting the gang to dive from the window as he looked up.
"Aah!", the gang reacted.
"It's Dad...! What the heck is he doing here?!", Rachel gasped.
"Okay. If we're quiet long enough, Ice King will think no one's home and go away.", Finn whispered.
But more banging on the front door. At least for a few more seconds, that is.
"Eh... No one's home. Guess I'll go away.", Ice King said before he started to walk away.
Everyone sighed in quiet relief. But that relief wasn't to last. Suddenly, BMO's alarm for Finn's bath went off, making everyone panic as Ice King noticed the noise going on from inside.
"Huh?", Ice King puzzled.
"What the heck, BMO?!", Rachel whisper-shouted.
"Just turn your alarm off!", Finn added.
"Hmm. That sounds like BMO!", Ice King guessed before knocking on the door again.
"Geez, little guy, what's your deal today?!", Marceline scolded.
"My alarm says it's time for Finn's bath. Finn, get naked.", BMO stated as his alarm said, "FINN'S BATH TIME".
"What?!", Rachel and Marceline squeaked in shock at the same time.
"No, just hit your snooze button!", Finn whispered.
"I cannot self-snooze. It's against my programming.", BMO responded.
"Well, then, can you at least tell us how to do it?", Betty asked.
"Press and hold.", BMO instructed, gesturing to the blue triangle and red circle buttons, which Finn and Jake press.
"Then, press the button on top of my head.", BMO advised next as a red button with three Z's on it appeared from a lid below it.
Once they pressed it, BMO made a "car alarm off" noise.
"I'm sorry. ...We can still take a bath...", BMO said.
"Wait... Take a bath. That's it! We could have a secret tape watching indoor pool party! That way, we could keep Finn's schedule intact and we could find what we're looking for as we watch these tapes at the same time!", Rachel whispered just before more banging was heard.
Then, Rachel and Finn peeped out from the window and opened it to speak with Ice King.
"What is it, Dad?", Rachel asked.
"I wanna watch secret tapes with you guys. It'll be nice.", Ice King replied.
"No, man!", Finn refused.
"But—", Ice King began.
"Try checking the flyer you got more closely. And besides that, it's Finn's bath time right now.", Rachel responded before she and Finn went back inside and closed the window.
"He doesn't know that we're watching his tapes. We need to find his secrets faster.", Finn said.
Later, Finn, Jake, Rachel, Betty, Marceline, Mille, and Callie were now in the bathtub together, washing themselves and each other up in as many spots as they can, especially while surrounded by bath bubbles as BMO sat on the bathroom chair while watching another tape on which Ice King is crying.
"Oh, diary! Thank you for listening to me!", Ice King sobbed.
"Ugh..., I think I remember hearing that gross story when I didn't mean to at one point. I know how that one goes... Fast-forward, please.", Rachel said.
Slowed down, the tape said: "Diary, I've been meaning to tell you something insanely private. But darest I? I... love... to... GRRRR! Fill my bathtub full of milk and sit in it like I'm a magic angel! There, I said it. The white of the milk is so dense. And when I poke my little toes up from under the milk, they startled me and I giggled! I giggled, diary. And they're my own toes, yet I giggled! And then I fall asleep, and the milk curdles and I get all stinky and sticky. Disgusting, diary, I'm disgusting! I'm disgusting...I'm disgusting and I smell like curdled milk! Anyway, back to the Turtle Princess."
"Play, BMO.", Finn spoke.
"So, there we are. Turtle Princess is frozen and in my little ice wheelbarrow, and there was... magic in the air. We were both feeling it. But before I could leave the library, Finn and Jake show up carrying a baby and a puppy in carriers with some technolo. You know how Jake is. Stretch this, stretch that, bah! He knocks off my crown and then Finn bonks me on the nose. Still hurts, too. The worst part is Turtle Princess took away my library card and Rae-Rae grounds me for trying to kidnap said princess! You know, dear diary, I'm starting to worry that all these entries sound exactly the same, and that my life is just me running in place on some... giant hamster wheel.", Ice King spoke as he scowled at the mention of Finn and Jake, frowned at Rachel's mention, and then sighed.
"Well, it's a good thing you two tied the knot when you did, huh?", Marceline asked.
"Like the old days.", Betty replied.
"Yeah. Neat.", Rachel grinned.
But Jake only sighed tiredly, bored with the Ice King's speech.
"Fast-forward, BMO.", Jake said tiredly.
Slowed down, the tape said: "This reminds me of the time that I got stuck in my bathroom. There was this squirrel- just don't ask. Anyway, long story short, imagine me crouched down on the kitchen floor, talking. I'm talking to the toilet paper! I'm like, 'Hey guys, who wants to go on an adventure?' and the toilet paper's like, 'what?'. You're my best friend, diary." As this went on, fast-forward or not, workout music started playing and the Ice King continued to speak in the background as Finn, Jake, and the others talked.
"I'm gonna take a nap...", Jake said.
"No! The last time anyone slept in the bathtub, don't even get me started with the milk.", Rachel warned.
"And these tapes are super important!", Marceline added.
"You're right. They are super important.", Finn said.
"We just don't know why yet.", Mille agreed.
"Whatever it is, the answer has to be in one of those tapes.", Callie added.
"BMO, fast-forward to triple speed!", Betty urged.
"Okay.", BMO replied before doing so. On the tape, Ice King was seen working out.
"BMO, play normal speed.", Finn said.
With that, the tape slowed down to normal motion with Ice King trying to lift weights.
"Come on, baby... in the pocket...", Ice King began before huffing, out of breath. "I can't do it..."
"Well, it's definitely not it. But it is cute.", Marceline grinned.
"Onto the next tape, then.", Rachel said before the tape was ejected and a new one was placed inside. But when it started up, it showed Ice Queen Betty in the image.
"Hello. My name is Betty Petrikov. I am recording this tape to document the events that have unfolded 1,000 years in the future.", Betty said.
"Mom...?!", Rachel spoke in surprise.
"Betty?!", everyone else except Betty said in similar surprise.
"You were in on this, too?!", Jake added.
"Sorry, guys. I don't know how my tapes got in there. Although, in retrospect, I was wondering where those went.", Betty said.
"That's right. The future. It turns out Rachel was there 1,000 years in the future. I have some questions about that. Could it be that she's immortal thanks to her tiara? Or is it that it's 20 years in the future from now? All I know is that my own life and even my own body started changing when she gave me this item.", Betty said in the tape as she took off the tiara for a moment before putting it back on.
"But that's okay. I'm actually happy to be with my new family. Well, actually, my old family but with magic ice powers. But regardless, both Simon and Rachel have changed so much over the years. Well, more so for Simon, anyway. But given how my own change is progressing so far with my mind intact, maybe it IS okay if I change, too. Maybe then, when my own transformation is complete, we could be a family together forever. For realsies. I know we've just been married, but, hey. I just hope I don't get too kooky from this.", Betty added in the tape.
"Aw, Mom...", Rachel spoke, tearing up with joy before the two hugged each other as Finn, Jake, Mille, Callie, and Marceline watched with heartfelt joy.
"Aw.", Jake grinned.
"And now, my plans for how our family can grow after marriage.", Betty spoke in the tape before the present Betty widened with her eyes and gasped.
"Oh, no...!", Betty squeaked.
"To help our family start to grow out more, I think the best course is to...", Betty began in the tape.
"AAH! QUICK! SKIP TO THE NEXT TAPE!", Betty panicked, waving her arms.
"Okay.", BMO spoke before fast-forwarding past Betty's tape onto a new one, this time, being Rachel's tape.
"What the...?! My tapes were there, too?!", Rachel exclaimed.
"Ooooooh!", everyone else said in disbelief.
"Hey, Diary. Well, uh... it feels weird talking like this... But... I'd like to say that... I'm happy that my mom and dad got married. It's good to see that our family's getting built back up again. Even Mom was willing to change herself to help make this work. For us. That's not something anyone can do. All the same, she must've sacrificed so much to make this work. It's time we made some sacrifices of our own. Dad no longer kidnapping princesses is a good start, though, so we're on track. I can only hope we could figure out what else to do to help it along one step further.", Rachel said in the tape, making Rachel and Betty blush to one another before hugging as everyone else grinned.
"Although, there is something I have been thinking about that might be a good enough start. It's about those new powers my tiara provided. It all started when Lumpy Space Princess accidentally bit me and Jake at the same time. What's stranger about it is, while Jake lost himself and turned completely lumpy inside and out, I only turned completely lumpy on the outside. I felt lumpy, sure, but... I still felt like...just me. I was even able to turn back to normal at will where Jake wasn't able to without the antidote. I'll never know how I was that lucky that day. All I know for now is... I'm starting to like it more than when it first happened to me. Don't tell anyone I said that. Point is, maybe we could do some exploring on that. Find out how the tiara really operates beyond giving us the power of ice, frost, and snow, really put that knowledge into good use that helps benefit all of Ooo. And maybe even have some fun with them every once in a while.", Rachel grinned in the tape, making Rachel blush bashfully as she explained the depths she learned thus far about her new powers on the tape as everyone else laughed.
Little did anyone know that Ice King was peeping from the top bathroom window.
"Are they havin' some kinda secret tape-watching indoor pool party in here? And what new powers is she talkin' about? The power to inflate? Burn!", Ice King spoke to himself with a cackle before he decided to continue watching.
"Oh, guys... This is so embarrassing...!", Rachel blushed.
"Hey. It's okay, Rae-Rae.", Finn assured.
"Yeah. You know we're just laughin' with you.", Jake added.
"You do have a way of bringing people together and making them happy.", Marceline added.
"Are those lumpy powers silly? Sure. But that's because it gives us something to be happy about.", Callie added.
"Huh. I never thought of it like that before.", Rachel said.
"I'll always love you, Rae-Rae. No matter what form you take or what powers you have.", Betty responded.
"Thanks, Mom.", Rachel grinned.
"Anyway, I think that's it for now. I gotta put you back before Dad notices. And Diary? Thanks. For being there for us.", Rachel said in the tape before it then went back to Ice King's tapes, making Ice King gasp from seeing this.
"That's... me?", Ice King asked in shock.
Then, he suddenly became irate and angry.
"THEY'RE WATCHING MY SECRET TAPES?!", Ice King shouted before going away from the window angrily. "And they're cozy in their indoor jacuzzi. Fine. No more nice. NOW YOU GET ICE!"
The irate Ice King then flew up and activated his ice magic.
"Try watching those tapes with FROZEN EYEBALLS!", Ice King shouted before laughing evilly as he sprayed snow on the Tree Fort.
Jake screamed as it then zoomed in toward his mouth.
Part 2
Jake was still screaming, but as it turns out, he was singing a song as he had a towel wrapped around him while now out of the bath tub as did everyone else except for BMO.
"...AAAAAAAAAaaaaaaloutte, gentille Alouette, Alouette, je te plumerai. Je te plumerai la tête! Je te plumerai la tête! Alouette, je te plumerai!", Jake sang, flopping his lips with his fingers to finish the song.
Naturally, Finn, Rachel, Marceline, Betty, Mille, Callie, and BMO applauded him.
"Huh. I guess you do know all the words.", Finn grinned.
"What made you bring that song up?", Rachel asked.
"Just wanted to try my hand at singing. You know, since you're a classical pro with the viola.", Jake responded.
"Huh.", Rachel responded.
"Anyway, start the next video, BMO. We gotta crack the code on the Ice King's secret tapes!", Finn said, waving a couple of tapes around at arm's length.
Little did they know that outside, the Ice King just finished covering the Tree Fort with snow and grunted angrily.
"Brrrr... You guys cold?", Finn asked.
"Yeah, it's kinda chilly in here.", Jake agreed.
"Well, we did just get out of the bath.", Marceline stated.
"Yeah, that's to be expected.", Callie agreed.
"In that case, let's get dressed back up. But this time, in something warmer to go along with them.", Betty suggested.
"Great idea. That way, we could get cozier as we watch the rest.", Mille grinned.
"In that case... MAXIMIZING WARMTH!", Rachel spoke in slight, feigned excitement.
Moments later, Ice King cleared the snow to look through a window. Finn, Jake, Rachel, Marceline, Betty, and BMO were now wearing sweaters and had the fireplace lit as Finn rewound the tape.
"Et tu, Betty? Well, I'll show them.", Ice King said as he left from the window and started making a snowman.
"This snowman looks pretty good. Pretty darn good!", the Ice King smiled as he put a face on it and laughed playfully.
Inside, Finn and company were watching a tape of Ice King crying. In it, Gunther came up.
"Wenk.", Gunther squawked.
"Could I have five more minutes, please?", Ice King asked.
Gunther then walked away as instructed while Ice King continued crying. Everyone stared awkwardly, if not sadly and sympathetically at the screen. During that time, a screen bug popped up that said, "You're watching AN ADVENTURE TIME CHRISTMAS SPECIAL—ON CN." After a moment, the video deactivated.
"Oh, Simon... You must've went through a lot... I swear. I am not going to leave you again. Ever.", Betty vowed.
Outside, though, Ice King was pacing back and forth in front of a snowman army.
"Some of you won't survive this. You'll melt or split in half or your head will fall off... but that's fine... because you're made of snow. Only one thing matters today! Getting into that tree house and getting my tapes back! Who's with me?!", Ice King shouted to the legion of snowmen, only to earn no response.
"Hey, why're you guys so quiet? Are you mad?", Ice King puzzled before he snapped his fingers in realization. "Oh, that's right. You're not alive yet. My bad."
Then, Ice King used his ice magic to put life into the snowmen. The snowmen yelled and grunted. Finn, Jake, and the others noticed the noise and ran towards the window. When Finn opened the curtains, Ice King was right in front of the window.
"Gimme my tapes back.", Ice King urged bluntly.
"Not yet, Dad. Not until we find what we're looking for.", Rachel refused.
But of course, Ice King wasn't gonna take that lying down.
"Snowmen! Attack!", Ice King ordered.
In no time, the snowmen came towards Ice King due to a slight miscalculation and attacked him as he screamed while Marceline, Betty, and Rachel winced in worry for him with sharp inhales.
"Crip, Jake! We gotta unravel these secrets at warp-crazy!", Finn urged, closing the curtain.
Hurriedly, the gang rushed to the bedroom and hid under the bed to watch another tape while Jake and Callie shrunk to make more room.
"Good morning. You're watching the evening news. There's been an unfortunate event. Let's go talk to some witnesses. Princess, what is your name?", Ice King asked while turning the camera toward an imprisoned Wildberry Princess.
"Please! Let me go home!", Wildberry Princess pleaded on tape.
"So, Princess "Please-let-me-go-home," what was it like to experience this tragedy?", Ice King asked jokingly.
"What? I... I don't... uh... um...", Wildberry Princess stammered.
"Yeah, we're on air, honey, so spit it out.", Ice King said.
"I... I don't know what you're talking about.", Wildberry Princess only replied.
"Obviously traumatized and in a state of shock. Let's go ask somebody else something.", Ice King said before turning the camera upside-down. "Upside-down Princess, do you think things will change politically because of today's events?"
"You're really frightening me.", Wildberry Princess only responded before Ice King turned the camera back to him.
"Well, there ya have it, folks. People are very upset that Gunther tried to eat Ice King's socks! Very upset! That's why Gunther has to stay in the corner.", Ice King replied, turning the camera toward Gunther in a corner.
"Weird...", Finn said.
"Dad, what are you doing?", Rachel asked on tape, making the present Rachel grin.
"Oh! This is my favorite part!", Rachel spoke giddily.
"Huh? Oh, uh..., nothing, Rae-Rae.", Ice King said.
"What did I tell you about kidnapping princesses?", Rachel glared on tape.
"Uh... The time has come!", Ice King shouted before taking off.
"Oh, no, you don't!", Rachel shouted before zapping and encasing him in an ice cage akin to Wildberry Princess's.
"Aw, man...!", Ice King groaned.
"Wildberry Princess, consider yourself free to go.", Rachel said, freeing the princess.
"Bless you, Ice Princess Rachel.", Wildberry Princess spoke before she took off while Rachel held up the camera.
"So, there you have it, folks! A false anchorman has been caught red-handed and frozen in the act of kidnapping princesses. Literally frozen. And now, he has to stay in the cage for a week as punishment.", Rachel said, turning the camera toward Ice King.
"Honestly, I think my dad's reaction when he tried to take off on me was funnier.", Rachel admitted.
Just then, a loud sound was heard.
"Oh, crubs, he's sneaking in through the chimney!", Marceline spoke in worry.
Meanwhile, Ice King busted horizontally though the chimney into the tree house.
"Ah... The element of surprise... Ah, jeez, I'm filthy.", Ice King groaned before taking off his soot-covered robe. "Well, now I'm cleaner, but I'm also nakeder."
Then, the Ice Wizard went to another room and noticed a table full of delicious-looking food.
"Ohh! Mmm...", Ice King said, licking his lips. "Just what I need...
He then pulled the tablecloth from under the dishes, shattering and spilling everything on the table.
"Hehehehe...", Ice King chuckled, donning a red cloth.
Then, he went to the door and opened it to reveal four waiting snowmen.
"Come on, come on!", Ice King invited.
With that, the snowmen entered the house while Ice King pulled out a locket with pictures of Finn and Jake in it to show the snowmen what they looked like before they scoured the house. Back in the bedroom, the gang were now watching a tape of Rachel singing a cover of Marceline's Fry Song. As the song progressed, though, both Rachel and Marceline groaned and blushed out of embarrassment while Betty grinned and giggled a bit.
Rachel: Daddy, why did you eat my fries?
I bought them, and they were mine.
"Gah...! This is even more embarrassing than before...!", Rachel groaned.
"You're embarrassed?! I'm the one who should be embarrassed! That song was super personal!", Marceline added.
"I was in the neighborhood! I didn't know!", Rachel responded.
"Then, why did you sing it?!", Marceline snapped.
"Because I wanted to try my hand at singing it, but my singing didn't sound that good!", Rachel retorted, causing Marceline to give an embarrassed grunt.
"Yeeeesh...", Jake commented.
"Are you kidding?! Your singing sounds beautiful!", Marceline shouted.
Hearing this made Rachel gasp with widened eyes.
"Mar-Mar... You think that my singing was... beautiful?", Rachel asked
"Think it? Dude, I know it!", Marceline responded.
"It was just as good as it was when you and I used to try out Karaoke.", Betty added, making Rachel grin with tears streaming down softly.
Rachel: But you ate them, yeah, you ate my fries...
And I cried, but you didn't see me cry.
Daddy,
Do you even love me?
Well, I wish you'd show it,
'Cause I wouldn't know it.
What kind of dad eats his daughter's fries,
And doesn't even look her in the eyes?
Daddy, there were tears there.
If you saw them would you even care?
Back in the other room, a snowman opened the refrigerator and motioned the other three snowmen to join him. The four snowmen looked through the refrigerator until Ice King angrily shooed them away.
"They wouldn't be in the fruit bowl!", Ice King whispered to a snowman looking in the fruit bowl.
When the snowman looked up, though, he had an apple stuck on his face.
"Ohhh! Well, look at you with your nose shining so bright! You're so unique! Hehe! I'll name you Red-nose, and make you leader of the pack!", Ice King grinned.
But then, he accidentally knocked the apple off the snowman's face.
"Eh... Well, now you look boring.", Ice King said, causing the snowman to make a devastated face before Ice King picked up the apple.
"You want somethin' done right, ya gotta do it yourself.", Ice King said before he stuck an apple on his nose and smiled.
In the bedroom, Finn and Jake were watching another tape of Ice King crying.
"No, not yet. That leaves only one tape left. That's gotta be from before Dad became the Ice King.", Rachel said.
Suddenly, a snowman then noticed them and knocked the bed over, uncovering the gang, frightening them with yells of shock and surprise.
"Now gimme my evil tapes back! They're supposed to be buried! In the ground!", Ice King shouted as he fired a warning ice blast shot at Finn, Jake, and the others, who dodged it.
"For what it's worth, you can have the rest back! We only need the one; the one we haven't watched yet!", Rachel shouted.
"No! Snow goons!", Ice King ordered.
While the rest fought, Betty carried BMO to protect it.
"Oh, no!", BMO spoke in worry.
"Don't worry, BMO!", Jake assured as he grabbed a snowman.
But, Ice King froze the snowman, trapping Jake in the process. In the meantime, Mille and Callie fought another snowman while Rachel and Finn fought a third and Marceline fought with a fourth.
"Everyone! There is one more tape!", BMO shouted, waving the tape.
"Play it!", Rachel and Marceline shouted in unison.
"No, BMO, please don't play it.", Ice King urged in panic.
But BMO did so anyway. The final video activated. But this time, a human man was shown on the screen.
"Hello. My name is Simon Petrikov. I am recording this tape so that people will know my story.", Simon introduced on tape.
"Simon...", Betty gasped touchingly as Rachel and Marceline gasped.
"Oh, no! Turn it off, BMO, turn it off!", Ice King panicked.
"No! It's okay! This is what we were looking for.", Rachel assured.
"I was studying to be an antiquarian of ancient artifacts. Now, I never believed in the supernatural stuff myself—just had a fascination with superstitions... but everything changed when I came into contact with these items. Rae-Rae! Can you come down here please?!", Simon asked as he slowly opened the safe and took out a gem-encrusted crown before out peeped a much younger Rachel with black hair and fairly normal skin color.
"I'm here!", young Rachel shouted with a cute grin, her tiara in view on top of her head.
Finn and Jake looked surprised.
"The Ice King!", Finn, Jake, Mille, and Callie shouted.
"Wow. Is that what you meant by getting your family back sometime ago, Rae-Rae? I thought it had somethin' to do with reincarnations and junk.", Jake admitted.
"Not exactly. It'll all make sense when we see the whole video.", Rachel assured as, interested, everyone else sat down to listen closer while Ice King worriedly came closer as well.
"Oh, you looked so cute back then, Rae-Rae.", Betty grinned.
"Mom...", Rachel blushed with a grin.
"After purchasing these crowns from an old dock worker in northern Scandinavia, I brought 'em home and we excitedly showed my wife Betty, and jokingly put it on my head just for a game of a royal family or something..", Simon spoke as he put on the crown in the tape, making both Rachel and Betty grin sadly from this.
"And that's when it started... Rachel started to develop ice powers of her own and was seemingly spared the worst of what it had to offer.", Simon stated as Rachel made cute snowflakes fall inside the room with a cute giggle.
"But I, on the other hand, wasn't so lucky. The visions... I fought with them... shouted at them until I realized it wasn't real—it was the crown! I quickly took it off... and saw my fiancée in front of me... looking at me with such shock. What had I said? What had I done when I wore this crown? All I know is my daughter Rachel and I never saw Betty again.", Simon asked as he raised his voice, frightened before taking the crown off and walking toward the picture of him and Betty back when the latter was pregnant.
Then, another recording activated. This time, the two Simon now had paler hair, blue skin, and stubble on his chin for Simon's case.
"Since then, I see the visions always whether or not Rae-Rae and I wear the crown and tiara. They tell me the secrets... the secrets of the ice and snow... that the power of the crown and the tiara will save us with their frost. I don't yet know what this means. As you can see, our skin is beginning to turn blue. Our body temperatures have been lowering at a supernatural rate, to what is now about 30°C. I don't know when it will end... I'm really scared...", Simon said just as outside, clouds formed and started to snow with a young Rachel hugging Simon.
"Don't be scared, Daddy. You still have me, remember?", Rachel asked, making Simon grin to her.
"That I do, Rachel... That I do...", Simon said with a sad grin before another recording activated.
By that time, Rachel's hair was now starting to get longer and Simon now has a white mustache and an unfinished beard.
"I know my mind is changing... but I'm already too far gone to know what to do. I want people to know that... if I do things... if I do things that hurt anyone, please... please forgive me.", Simon pleaded with Rachel, now 10 years old in the video, hugging him again.
"Of course I forgive you, Dad. And I'm sure Mom would, too.", Rachel assured.
Then, a third and recording activated. In the recording, Simon now very closely resembled Ice King just as Rachel was now seen resembling her present self more closely as she helped Marceline set up the sled.
"Look! That's us!", Rachel said in surprise, pointing to her and Marceline's younger selves, making them flash back to when they were prepping the sled.
"Hello, Marcy. Rae-Rae. I don't know if you'll ever hear this message. I fear my thoughts are no longer my own. Just... watch over me until I can find a way out of this labyrinth in my brain and regain my sanity! And then maybe Betty, my princess... maybe you will love me again. Please love me again, Betty!", Simon sobbed. "Okay, bye."
Then, Simon took out the tape and pushed the camera over before sighing.
"Hey, Simon. We, uh, finished packing your gear. So can I have my tape now?", Marceline asked.
"What? No. This is private, silly. There you go. Snug as a bug.", Simon said as he tucked the tape into a bag on the sled.
"Dad? Please don't go.", Rachel pleaded sadly.
"I... I have to protect you two.", Simon said sadly.
"How can you protect us if you're not even here?!", young Marceline retorted.
"I'll arrange for someone to come take care of you. I'll make sure he doesn't leave.", Simon assured, holding his hand up, which temporarily arced out blue electricity.
"Please, Dad, we could help you with this. Together.", Rachel pleaded.
"Yeah, maybe one day you both will. But until then, you two have to stay brave, my fearless Marceline, my brave snow angel.", Simon said as he hugged the two of them, even touching Marceline's cheek as tears escaped her eyes.
But as soon as his thumb touched the tear, it froze it. And when he moved it, the frozen tear scratched her face.
"Ouch!", a young Marceline said.
"You see? I have to go now. Goodbye, Marci.", Simon said as he shook the frozen tear off, hopped on sled, and sped off, leaving young Rachel and young Marceline behind.
"What? No!", young Marceline shouted.
"Dad! Come back!", Rachel shouted as she and Marceline chased after him.
"Wait! Ugh!", young Marceline shouted before she and Rachel tripped and fell in the snow.
"Dad! DAD!", young Rachel shouted.
"Simon! SIMON!", young Marceline shouted in desperate unison.
Simon sadly left while Rachel and Marceline both called out for Simon. It faded out before, in the present, Rachel and Marceline were now crying as was Ice King, who cried just as much as well.
"Drrr-AMA bomb!", Jake shouted in surprise.
"Now you know my secret! You know... that I used to wear glasses!", Ice King exclaimed, sobbing more.
"Oh, you poor man." Betty got up and walked over to comfort him.
Ice King thought she was going to laugh at him, looking away from her, but was surprised when she hugged him.
"I'd love you no matter what you wore in the past.", Betty said to him tears streaming down her cheeks.
"You… you would?" Ice King asked.
"Of course, you big dum-dum! I love you for you.", Betty said before kissing him with her eyes closed.
As she did, her light silver hair grew longer, reaching all the way to the very floor, surprising everyone watching.
"Mom, your hair.", Rachel gasped in surprise.
Betty made an Ice Mirror and saw that her hair was now at its fullest length just as it became as white as the purest of snow ever made, smiling before turning back to Ice King.
"If I had the choice to change anything about you, then I wouldn't change a thing.", Betty continued to her husband in compliments.
Then suddenly, her teeth began to tingle as she looked back at the mirror to see them sharpening to points.
"And I don't ever want to change you. In fact, I want to change for you, into someone you love and cherish.", Betty continued after turning back to Ice King.
Then finally, Betty's skin turned a very dark light blue color matching not only Ice King's skin, but also her daughter's.
"I love you, Ice King. And I want you to love me like you used to.", Betty finished, kissing Ice King again.
This time, the kiss caused the crown to spark as something miraculous happened. In no time, after the spark came and gone, Ice King's beard suddenly shrank down into non-existence while his body became less shriveled and more well-built. Even his nose shrank to a certain point, still remaining pointy as well. The sudden change left everyone awe-struck.
"Dad...?", Rachel asked in awe.
"Betty...?", Simon asked, surprising Betty before she shed happy tears.
"It's good to see you, Simon.", Betty grinned.
"It's good to be seen.", Simon responded before kissing Betty.
"Hey, Dad!", Rachel spoke up, attracting his attention.
"Rae-Rae! My little snowflake...!", Simon spoke in relief as he and Rachel both hugged each other.
"Glad to have you back.", Rachel said, shedding happy tears.
"Simon!", Marceline spoke up, overjoyed.
"Marceline!", Simon shouted before the two embraced.
"I knew you two'd help me with the crown's madness.", Simon beamed.
"We thought we'd never see you again.", Marceline grinned.
"I can hardly believe it myself. You and Rae-Rae are all grown up.", Simon grinned.
"Believe! They're like a million years old!", Jake added.
"One million years? How could it be?!", Simon reacted.
"He's just kidding.", Marceline assured.
"We're actually only a thousand.", Rachel added.
"And still looking good!", Jake added.
"Do you remember anything from when you were the Ice King?", Mille asked.
"Nothing specific—just dreamlike impressions.", Simon responded.
"Do you still have impressions from all the times we flipped your bricks?", Finn asked.
"I have... bruises.", Simon responded.
"Yeesh.", Finn winced.
"Well, all that matters now is that you're back.", Betty grinned.
"Yes, but what happened to you?", Simon asked.
"Oh, this? Rae-Rae made this magic tiara for me. It may've changed my body, but not my mind.", Betty explained.
"It was a lot of work to make it, too. I actually finished the day we found the Enchiridion recently.", Rachel added.
"Oh. Well, that's good. I guess.", Simon grinned cautiously.
"Yeah. You guys are like a royal ice family.", Jake added.
"An ice family?", Simon asked.
"Yeah. You're the Ice King, Mom's the Ice Queen, and I'm the Ice Princess.", Rachel explained.
"Oh. Well, that's not so bad.", Simon said before then coming up with an idea.
"Except there's one change I'd like to make. You can still call me, Dad, Rae-Rae. But everyone else? How about instead of Ice King, you can just call me... Winter King?", Simon asked.
"Winter King, huh? Sure. We could work with that.", Finn grinned.
Later, everyone was sitting down together all wrapped up in sweaters in front of BMO as Shelby narrated the end.
"And so, it was decided... that once every year when the weather got chilly, that Finn, Jake, Rachel, Mille, Callie, Simon the Winter King, Betty the Winter Queen, BMO, Princess Bubblegum, Marceline the Vampire Queen, Cinnamon Bun, Peppermint Butler, Phil, a candy cane man, one of the gumdrop girls, Lady Rainicorn, Lumpy Space Princess, that guy, the other guy, a pig, Tree Trunks, a two-headed duck, the old crazy Tart Toter, the punch bowl, a booger, and Gunter... would get together while wearing really big sweaters and watch videos on the floor next to a fire... to celebrate the day when Finn, Jake, Rachel, Marceline, Mille, Callie, and Betty had helped Simon rediscover himself and come a long way from being the biggest weirdo in Ooo. It was a miracle. Good night.", Shelby narrated.
THE END
A/N: That's right! Simon Petrikov is back! And he's better than ever! Who knows what would happen now that Simon's back early, but with the crown's powers intact with the madness now neutralized? I'll bet it'll be even more algebraic...! :)