And you wanna scream
Don't call me "kid"
Don't call me "baby"
Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me
You showed me colors
You know I can't see with anyone else
Abe noticed how she felt cold and distant that night in the princess' presence. Though all her friends seemed delighted with her, Sam kept a serious face and didn't address him or her all night.
She even suggested the princess could sleep in his bed while she would take the spare one in the guest bedroom. But the princess assured her, she wasn't here to stay the night.
Sam didn't know what was wrong with her. The princess presence, just knowing she existed and was here, and had a kind of intimacy she never had with Abe, make her heart ache. She wanted to cry, all the time. Maybe it was PMS.
When Abe returned to his bedroom, Sam was already asleep. With her back to him. T-shirt and pants instead of nightgown. And Abe was lulled into sleep by the soft rain while wondering what did went wrong.
Abe woke up with a light thunder in the sky. The rain had stopped. The storm going away. He looked to his left to see the bed empty. Startled, he got up and saw all the lights were off.
He looked for her everywhere and couldn't find her. He went through the kitchen and living room passing by Emma who was fast asleep in the couch. As he walked out the door, a fresh wind hit his skin and his telepathic ability pulled him in her direction.
It took him a while to find her, sitting at the beach. She changed into a silk purple combination of spaghetti strap tank top and shorts. Her hair was down flying in the wind. He stared at her with her back to him and thought she could pass as a sea nymph.
Abe walked to her and sat down by her side saying nothing. She kept staring at the dark sea in the horizon for what seemed like a long time to him. But he was patient and waited for her to say something first.
- It was too hot inside. I couldn't sleep.
She said. He barely nodded, also staring at the horizon. She looked at him and hugged her legs to her body, resting her chin on a knee.
- I'm sorry about... earlier.
He smiled.
- I thought we didn't say that to each other.
She sighed.
- I don't know what came over me. I'm so... confused.
- It's just... you can be honest with me you know.
- I know. - but her voice didn't sound confident of it.
- I was worried about you. - he said, pushing her hair back on her shoulder and provoking a slightly shiver.
- That's about all I do lately. Make you worry.
- That's not truth. You also make me angry lately.
She couldn't tell if he was joking or not.
- I miss how we were. - she said.
- What do you mean?
- I mean, before all of that mess.
- How were we?
- Well, I didn't make you worried or angry to start. It was easy between us.
He frowned.
- It is you that complicate it, dear.
She said nothing.
- Tell me more. How do you think we were before?
- We were friends. Partners in work. It seemed I could tell you anything, any problem and you would solve it.
- Then, tell me now. Nothing has changed.
- Everything has changed, you, me. Now you are angry and worried and I'm complicated and confused.
She seemed like she was holding back tears. So he put an arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. She laid her head in his chest.
- Nothing has changed. Nothing has to change. But if you keep putting distance between us... maybe. If you don't want me, like... this... you can be honest.
She clicked her tongue.
- Of course I want you, Abraham.
- So if you want me and I want you, what's the problem?
- The problem is I spent four years trying to keep away from you. And it was all for nothing.
Abe stood up and walked away angrily before turning back to her.
- You know. That's right. I should have left you alone. I shouldn't have looked for you. I should have moved on and let you move on with a Harvard guy. A normal guy who could take you out on dates and pick you up after your classes and kiss you in front of the whole world. Do you think I didn't think about it?
Tears fell down her cheeks.
- Isn't that what you want?
She moved her head side to side.
- I should have. But I didn't want to. I wanted to be selfish. I wanted you and would do anything to not let you go. So why? Why can't you just be honest with me?
She stood up and ran to him. Wrapping her arms around his neck.
- So don't leave me. Don't let me go. - she whispered to him. Her tears falling down his shoulder.
He hugged her with all the strength he had in his arms.
- I... - she tried. - The problem is... I don't know how to be honest without sounding stupid.
- I would never think you stupid.
- It's just... - she pulled out of his arms and looked down to her hands. - I'm not ready to tell you just yet. But I have been there before. With someone who told me he loved me and that I was the one and later he left me for another. And it's okay, you know. I'm okay about that now, but... it was hard. And he was never as important to me as you are. So if you ever walk away... and I know... I know I can't ask that of you. I won't. I don't want you to feel trapped with a promise. I just preferred to break my own heart in case you were too polite to do it or because I don't think I could have... if you chose her.
"And you should. You should choose her. She is perfect for you in a way I could never be. You two look perfect together. You have a beautiful connection. That's why I left. I left so you wouldn't have to choose. I left because I could never face what it would feel like if you choose her. And I'm so sorry. About all of it."
Abe stared at her. He didn't know what to say.
- I've always esteemed you, since we first met. And I had a crush on you that kept growing and growing, but when it all started. When we had sex for the first time, I've never thought it would make me feel this away. Like I would break if you choose another.
She sighed.
- So that's that.
Abraham only stared at her for a couple of minutes and she started to get impatient.
- Aren't you going to say something? Didn't you want honesty from me? To know why I left?
- Indeed. I just wasn't expecting that much.
- Well, you that's what you get. It actually makes me feel so much better now.
He stepped close to her.
- Let's go for a swim.
- What? It is dark?
- I thought you came here to freshen up.
- Yes, but not in the sea.
He grabbed her hand and pulled her in the direction of the shore.
- No, Abe. Please.
- What is the problem?
- I don't like to swim at night. There's fish and creatures in the water.
He looked back at her, holding his hands with palms up and shrugging.
- That's not what I mean. And you're not a fish.
He chuckled and continued taking her by her hand into the water.
- Seriously Abe. I can't swim.
- I didn't seem so at Antarctica.
- That was different. It was a life or death situation.
- So is this. I'm gonna die if I don't kiss you right now.
- Abraham stop! I'm serious - she got away from him. - I'm scared of deep water. Terrified. So don't.
He walked to her and pulled her chin up to look inside her eyes.
- I've got you. I won't let any of the sea creatures to get close to you. After all, you're all mine.
And he kissed her.
Don't call me "kid"
Don't call me "baby"
Look at this idiotic fool that you made me
You taught me a secret language
I can't speak with anyone else
And you know damn well
For you, I would ruin myself
A million little times