It's taken years of dancing around each other to find themselves at this point but Zagreus wouldn't change the experience one bit. And now—well, they're figuring things out. He and Thanatos, and just how to hide it from the Ton.
They aren't afraid of what might be said; Achilles and Patroclus wear their affections openly. Olympians do not particularly care, far too enamored in betting on the who, making a game of it. Thanatos and Zagreus are just far more private in their affairs, preferring to keep the gossip away.
They dance about in quiet, unsullied moments stolen behind the backs of others. Lingering touches and fingers curled around palms. Stolen kisses behind archways and the sharing of breaths as they pull each other close, pressing their foreheads together.
"I love you," is whispered under the stars as they swirl beneath a musicless night sky. Zagreus laughs as he watches Thanatos blink slowly, his pale eyelashes fluttering against his pink cheeks, mildly embarrassed. Then he murmurs it back, so softly that it can barely be heard.
It is nice, perfect even. Happiness fills Zagreus to the brim and it is noticed by just about everyone.
And yet, he wants more. Something else, something a little bit further than just the throes of love.
His mother watches him with a critical eye, her gaze narrowed as she taps at her chin. She never says anything, just stares as she thinks away thoughtfully. Zagreus's head is too far into the clouds to ever consider that she might be cooking up a plan of her own.
One day, Persephone catches her son by his sleeve, fingers digging into his elbow gently. "Zagreus," she says, "it's nearing the end of the season. What do you say about tripping out to the summer home? I think that we all could use a break, particularly away from your father."
Zagreus laughs at that, ruffling his unruly hair. "I suppose that it's about time. You're usually itching to get away midway through spring."
His mother huffs at that, rolling her eyes. She loves his father but prefers her distance at times, mentally exhausted from tiptoeing around his expectations. "Extend an invitation to Lady Nyx and her son, yes?"
Zagreus does a double-take. "I'm… er, sorry?"
"You heard me." She turns to leave him, waving her hand about. "Tell them that they cannot refuse. I won't take no for an answer!"
#
The Hades Family summer estate is a wide and sprawling thing that bursts with gardens.
Zagreus climbs from the carriage, breathing in the fresh, flowery air. Thanatos is close on his heels, standing stiff and a little rigid, unsure of what to do with himself. "Hey," says Zagreus, nudging at him, "have you ever been on a proper vacation?"
"Don't be ridiculous. Of course, I have."
For some reason, Zagreus doubts it.
Persephone stops before the two of them, brushing away the travel grime from her skirts. Nyx stands beside, looking as prim and proper as always, effortlessly put together.
"Alright, you two," says Persephone, gazing between Zagreus and Thanatos. "Go have fun." A pause. "And when I say fun, I mean fun."
Thanatos looks confused, his head cocked to the side.
"Mother," says Zagreus, "I—"
"Quiet," she cuts in. She sighs dramatically. "Boys, I swear. As if I don't know the two of you…" She waves vaguely between them.
Zagreus looks to Nyx for help, who only smiles with subtle amusement. "Don't look at me, child. You're about as subtle as the first layer of Hell."
Oh. Oh, Gods, this is the worst.
"There are no prying eyes here and the staff won't spill. Enjoy yourselves. That is all I'm asking." Then, Persephone turns to Thanatos, reaching out to squeeze his hands gently. "Don't let him bully you."
Thanatos looks at her, affronted. "I—" But he doesn't finish his thought and Persephone laughs the entire way to the house.
#
Despite the teasing of their mothers, Zagreus and Thanatos find comfort in the freedom of the Estate.
They picnic underneath the trees, sharing cheeses and crackers, and goblets of the finest wine straight from Dionysus' vineyards. They lay about in the grass, pinkies hooked together as they count the clouds and imagine their shapes.
Late nights are spent retired to the parlor, the fire lit to fend off the evening chill as Thanatos reads dumb poetry to Zagreus in that quiet, lilting voice of his. They don't see the way that their mothers peek in on them, smiling as they watch Zagreus lying with his head in Thanatos' lap. Thanatos combs through his wild hair as he reads, caught in their own little world as everything else around them just fades away.
It is easy to lose themselves in such simple touches and their softly shared kisses under the cover of the stars.
One night things shift. The days have passed by in a pleasant blur, leaving Zagreus and Thanatos to share an evening stroll, dressed down in only their trousers and shirts. Once by the grand fountain, they catch music that wafts in from the main room of the estate.
"It's silly for Mother to hire a quartet," says Zagreus. "Only the family is here at the estate, and you and I are outside. They're playing for a party of two."
"Are you so easily forgetting the staff?" Thanatos chuckles as he reaches out, pulling Zagreus close to him, slipping an arm around his waist. "Nice to dance to, though."
"Oh? Do you like dancing?"
"I do now," says Thanatos, surprisingly confident in his flirting.
Zagreus gives in easily and they twirl around the courtyard, bodies flush as they sink into the feel of each other. Thanatos seems at ease here, with so few eyes watching. He's far more relaxed than Zagreus has ever seen since coming back home, even when alone in his presence.
As they spin, Zagreus pushes at him, teasing. Thanatos trips, falling backward, dumping himself directly into the fountain. He sputters as he resurfaces, soaked to the bone.
Zagreus bursts into laughter, loud, pulling at his gut. And then he stops when Thanatos stands, his shirt clinging to him, hiding nothing. Zagreus' mouth goes dry, his throat bobbing as his thoughts turn incredibly lewd.
"Dammit," murmurs Thanatos, though he sounds amused. "It's cold."
Zagreus is hot, he's practically burning, watching as Thanatos pulls himself from the water slowly. When they meet gazes again, he can't hide the way that he gapes, red in the face. Thanatos looks down at himself, pressing a hand to his chest.
And then he realizes.
The moment is heated. There is no hesitation when they trip over themselves to retire inside.
#
They have shared frenzied kisses and shared breaths. Lingering touches that sweep over the thick layers of their clothing, and wandering hands that drifted a little too far to be considered proper—but this is new.
Zagreus falls against the bed, sinking into the soft mattress as he watches Thanatos. Thanatos tugs his cravat off and pulls his collar open. The shirt is still wet, clinging tightly to his skin, hiding nothing of his taut form. Zagreus's throat goes dry as he just stares.
The churning in his gut can't be ignored. His trousers are tight with his hard cock that aches.
Thanatos climbs onto the bed and kisses him with a desperation that clings to both of them. He cups Zagreus's chin, tilting his face back for better access as he licks into his mouth. Thanatos's tongue sweeps across his, soft and yielding as Zagreus presses back.
They fit together perfectly. Thanatos slots himself between Zagreus's legs, tugging him closer by the hips. He moans when his cock brushes against Zagreus's, stiff in his clothing, twitching slightly with every gentle grind of his body.
"Oh," murmurs Zagreus against his mouth. "That's—"
"Perhaps this is too bold of me, but I want—"
"No, no," cuts in Zagreus. His hand finds Thanatos's hip, squeezing it tight. "I want it too. I want this, I want you."
Thanatos pulls back to lean on his thighs, eyes narrowly slit as he watches Zagreus with a heated gaze. It's taken a lot for them to get to this point; years of awkward shuffling about and unresolved feelings. But it's worth it, it's so worth it.
And that's what Zagreus tells him before leaning up to pull his shirt off.
The cool night air is crisp against his skin. Thanatos's cheeks tint pink as his eyes linger, dragging across the length of him. "Just—look at you," he breathes. Thanatos drags a hand down Zagreus's front as though he still can't quite believe it.
"Come on, you next." Zagreus tugs at the hem of Thanatos's shirt.
Their clothing comes off quickly. Fingers ghost over fevered flesh, shaking slightly with both wonder and anticipation. Zagreus moans when Thanatos thumbs across a nipple, arching against him. That hand smooths over his skin, seeking out every curve and angle, touching every scar and freckle, mapping out every crease it can find.
And then, a hesitant brush of fingertips at the base of Zagreus's cock. Thanatos looks at it intensely, biting his lip. "I've never—I mean, I have. With my own, I suppose, but I—"
"Thanatos," says Zagreus softly, hoping to ease the tension. "You can't get it wrong." He wraps his fingers around Thanatos's hand, settling it around his cock.
His touch is like a fire that ravages through him. Zagreus immediately bucks into the loose grasp, choking on his next breath. "Oh," he whispers. "Oh, that's—" The moan he looses is long and drawn out as his eyes slip closed, focusing on the way that Thanatos's hand feels around his cock.
He's right, of course. Thanatos really can't get it wrong; every movement of his hand is divine. Zagreus whines underneath him, rutting into his grasp, seeking out more friction against Thanatos's palm.
"Gods." Thanatos's voice is soft and reverent. His eyes practically glow in the darkness of the room. "I… you are…"
"Keep doing that. It feels—oh, yes please." Thanatos chuckles as he jerks him, squeezing his length tightly, spreading the precome that drips from the tip. It isn't slick enough, so Thanatos lets go long enough to lick his hand. "Holy—" Zagreus can't think straight enough to finish his sentence with the new, wet glide of Thanatos's hand when he grabs him again.
"So hard," muses Thanatos as he pumps him. "Are you close?"
Yes. Yes. Zagreus feels the tell-turn pinch in his gut as that all-consuming fire threatens to take over him. He whimpers softly, bucking against his hand. "I'm—fuck, I'd rather not—"
Thanatos tilts his head. "No?"
"Not yet—oh, gods."
"Not yet," repeats Thanatos, teasing.
"I'd rather you be in me when I—what's with that look?"
Thanatos's hand stills entirely. He looks at Zagreus, his face red and wanton as if he didn't expect Zagreus to say such a thing. "You'd… lay under me?"
"I already am. I've—gods, this is embarrassing." He hides his face in the crook of his elbow. "Yes, I'd…" Zagreus licks at his lips. "I've wanted to. Dreamt about it, even."
Thanatos releases his cock in favor of holding his waist. He thumbs over the soft skin of Zagreus's belly, then at the base of his dick. Then, he presses Zagreus's thighs back, sinking his fingers into his asscheeks. "I'm not… I mean, I've been with… But a man—" Thanatos's brow crinkles slightly. "I wouldn't know how to properly…"
"I'll show you." Zagreus says it immediately, without thought. Sort of regrets it a moment later. Oh, he's right fucked himself, hasn't he? "That is to say—" He clears his throat primly. "I may have indulged on my own in a rather exploratory manner."
"To the thought of me?"
"Who else?"
Thanatos grins thin, his mouth curved. "What a scoundrel," he says. "What would the ladies think?"
"The ladies can fuck off. You're the one in my bed." As if he'd want anyone else. Zagreus wouldn't dream of it, not after years of pining and wondering if he'd allowed the touch of another man.
They fumble around after that, trying to find the best sort of positioning. Zagreus pulls out a jar of oil, shamelessly half-full, clearly well-used. Thanatos watches him with a hawklike gaze as Zagreus lays on his back, one thigh pulled to his chest, his free hand between his asscheeks.
The first finger always stings a little—but it's the sort of sting that builds pleasure. Zagreus huffs, pressing into the knuckle, wriggling it about as he tries to ease into it. And then a second, spreading his rim wide as he fucks against his hand, loosening his hole.
Thanatos's gaze is intense, eyes trained on Zagreus's hand. "Oh," he says softly, spreading Zagreus's asscheeks for a better look.
Zagreus knows that he must look a mess, biting at his lip as he presses in one last finger. Three, because Thanatos's cock is impressive enough to be a little intimidating at first glance. He moans as presses his fingers deep, curling them. So close—so close—
But his fingers are too short to hit the right spot.
Thanatos reaches out, pressing his thumb against Zagreus's swollen rim where it's stretched around his fingers. "Thanatos, I want—"
"Tell me. Please, I want to know."
"You. I want—" Shit, it's embarrassing, confessing this. Zagreus pulls his fingers out, feeling the way that his hole clenches around the loss. It must be a sight because Thanatos stares at him like a man starved. "Just fuck me, please."
Thanatos leans close, his thighs tense with anticipation. He slicks his cock up with enough oil to drench the sheets. The tip presses against Zagreus's hole gently, testing the give. It's a slow drag, Thanatos sliding into him. He grips at Zagreus's legs so tight that there will likely be bruises, purpling crescents that will Zagreus's pale skin.
"Oh, fuck," hisses Zagreus. Thanatos immediately stalls, concerned. "No, I didn't mean—don't stop, you git. It feels—oh, it's good."
Thanatos heaves relieved sigh, thumbing circles against the meat of Zagreus's thigh. "I thought I'd—Gods, you're…" He leans forward, moaning against Zagreus's neck once he's fully seated. "Zagreus," he sighs, nosing against the length of his neck.
Zagreus feels full to the throat, mind blanking at the thick feel of Thanatos's cock in him. It's a sort of completeness, in a way. He didn't know that he'd been lacking until he was filled, right to the brim. He curls his arms around Thanatos's neck, holding him there. "You feel good," he says against Thanatos's ear. "Perfect, even."
"I'm—Zagreus."
"Please move." Zagreus nips at Thanatos's ear. "I'm begging you to move."
Thanatos does. He pulls back and fucks back in with unsteady movements, trying to find the right rhythm. "You're so tight," he says, his voice strained. His arms bulge slightly as he holds himself overtop, keeping his weight off of Zagreus. "Gods, it's—you're—"
Different, no doubt. Thanatos moans lowly, burying his face into the crook of Zagreus's neck.
Their lovemaking isn't smooth, it's uncoordinated and a little awkward. Thanatos's cock carves its way through him, heavy and thick in his ass. Zagreus keens, fingers yanking at the sheets as he tries to ground himself. Every thrust strikes white-hot in his stomach. Thanatos's cock reaches depths that his fingers never have, that Zagreus didn't think possible.
Zagreus clings to Thanatos, arching against him, his nails raking down his back. "Gods, I love you," he says. "I've always loved you, I never stopped, even in those missing years."
Thanatos grunts, leaning back, lifting Zagreus's hips slightly. The angle changes and the tip of Thanatos's cock strikes his prostate with surprising accuracy.
Zagreus goes taut against him, bucking. "There, oh, fuck, there. Thanatos—"
"Look at you, spread before me." Thanatos's gaze is ruddy and debauched. He reaches between them, touching where they're connected, watching as his cock glides in and out of Zagreus. "You take me so well, fuck."
Zagreus cries out as his cock twitches, the tip leaking as it aches. He wraps a hand around himself, tugging at his length. Thanatos fucks into him with a rolling pace, stuttering thrusts that strike just the right spot. Pleasure pools in Zagreus's gut, stretching long and thin—and then it snaps.
He clenches around Thanatos's dick as he comes, painting his stomach white. Thanatos's movements stagger slightly as he watches, his expression pinched as he ruts into him. "Beautiful," he says, leaning forward, pressing their foreheads together. "Gods, you're so handsome. I love you."
A few more stammering presses drag across Zagreus's insides before Thanatos grinds in deep, tipping over the edge. They both moan, caught up in the heat of the moment. Zagreus pulls at Thanatos's hair, scratching against the feathery soft strands, just at the base of his neck. They ride their highs together, relishing in the closeness, and the way that Zagreus is speared on his length.
It's over too quickly. To be expected, they both suppose, considering the impulsive nature of just how they lost themselves in each other.
"Because you fell into the damn pool," whispers Zagreus. "I should have pushed you in ages ago."
Thanatos smiles, kissing his brow sweetly. Then his cheek, and his nose. He tilts Zagreus's mouth up and kisses that too. "I wasn't aware that you were so desperate. I think the both of us were too keen on being careful, considering our public image and all."
"Patroclus and Achilles don't care, and neither does anyone else."
"That isn't it," says Thanatos. "I just like having you to myself."
Zagreus smiles then, love filling him. "I think that everyone knows. Case in point—our mothers."
Thanatos's expression turns cross. "Don't mention them when you're naked underneath me. I'd rather think of anything else."
"Like another round?"
"Another—" Zagreus rolls them over, settling across Thanatos's lap. His cock is half-hard, still settled in him. Zagreus grinds against him, groaning. "So deep," he murmurs, his eyes alight with mischief.
Thanatos gives in easily enough.