Chapter 12

Lily had been thinking about the big Delorgan since she'd found out he had left Grantsbend. Every other day she had checked in with her friend to see if Pherein had returned. After several days she feared he would never return though the fact he still had things at the Sorrowful Ranger gave her hope. She had thought long and hard about their last exchange and was humiliated by how she had acted. The proud woman hadn't even considered this man might be different from others and that his rejection of her advances had been no true rejection but actually a show of respect, or dare she imaged, affection. Her cheeks burned with embarrassment at the whole thing, and she pledged to make it right.

When she had received word of his return her heart soared, and she danced a jig with Molly that had caused the precocious girl to giggle with delight. The young girl had been asking regularly about the 'man with the big sword' which only added to the islander's charm. She flew on light feet to the Sorrowful Ranger and found out he had just left but had likely gone to a small park that was off the town square where he was often seen meditating.

Excitement grew in the woman as she flew to the park, running delicate fingers through her blond hair and brushing dust off her dress. By the time she moved into the hedged, tree-lined park her heart was beating up into her mouth in anticipation. Then she saw him.

With another woman.

"Lily?" Pherein asked in shock at the woman's sudden appearance.

"Hello, Pherein, it's so good to see you," Lily declared nervously then stammered, looking at the dark-haired beauty who now glared at her. "I…I am truly sorry that I interrupted you."

"What are you doing here, Lily?" Pherein asked, stunned by the development.

Before the blue-eyed woman could reply Lauren cut it. "Ah yes, you did interrupt us."

"I truly am sorry. I…I did not mean to…" Lily replied, face reddening and her embarrassment evident.

"Then why don't you just run along and let us finish our conversation," Lauren blurted out, her anger rising and getting the better of her.

"I'm sorry...Pherein, I am sorry," Lily stammered and turned to walk away.

"Wait! Please, don't go!" Pherein implored.

The Delorgan had been caught off guard, that was obvious to all. He had been enraptured by Lauren's intoxicating intensity. Initially when the blonde-haired woman who was still the source of anger showed up he had been irritated. But something about her manner and look gave him pause for thought.

"Pherein!" Lauren interjected sharply. Then seeing the turmoil on the face of the Delorgan she went from rage to calm in the blink of an eye. "Of course, you want to talk to your friend. I will see you shortly. You know where to find me if you would like to do that sooner." The woman gave him a peck on the cheek and skipped off though giving a subtle glare to Lily on her way past.

How stupid could you be? He has a woman, and you practically threw yourself at him! Lily admonished herself. He was just being nice to you all along. Or maybe my opportunity was lost, never to return. The woman didn't know what to do and was frozen by indecision.

"What are you doing here?" Pherein asked again, breaking the woman out of her circular thoughts. His look was intense with a hint of anger, but also openness.

Lily breathed deeply and the ragged way it sounded showed her nervousness. "I…I am truly sorry for interrupting, Pherein. But…but I wanted to apologize for how I acted the last time I saw you. I was totally in the wrong and beg your pardon."

Pherein opened his mouth to retort, temper flaring at the reminder of what had happened, but the seasoned warrior saw the woman's eyes tear up as she looked away from his intense stare so remained quiet.

"I humiliated myself and was disrespectful to you in my actions," Lily confessed, voice barely above a whisper as she looked down at the cut pave stones on the ground. "I was confused…"

"So why then?" Pherein asked, more gently than he felt, but he tried hard to not show his emotions.

"I have not…I mean…," the woman gulped hard to hold back a sob, "…other men have expected that."

"I am not other men."

"I know that…now…but I fear too late," Lily whispered, head down.

Pherein was confused, perhaps even more confused than when he'd first left Delorgan and that was saying a lot. He had just begun to open himself up to the possibilities of something with Lauren, who was making her interest very clear to him. Yet prior to the misguided incident that had happened between him and Lily the woman had captured his attention in a way that hadn't happened since he'd left his homeland.

"Lily…," Pherein began but the woman looked up with glassy eyes to stop him.

"No, you need not say anything. I know now you have another. I will not interfere. At least I was able to beg your pardon for my foolish action."

Tears staining her eyes and cheeks burning in embarrassment, Lily turned and walked away quickly but after four strides her arm was caught in a firm but gentle grasp.

"Wait."

Lauren walked away in a rage back to the university. Who does that woman think she is, barging in on my moment?

The fiery graduate student had barely been able to keep her temper in check. It had flared momentarily, and she was certain Pherein hadn't seen it, but she wasn't sure. The complicated woman hadn't been sure of her feelings for the big Delorgan but now she was certain she wanted him. Yes, she wanted him badly. The privileged Latrellan didn't think about the competitive nature of her declaration and could care less. Lauren Ivanov was used to getting what she wanted and had learned from her father to let nothing get in the way of her objective. And now she decided she wanted Pherein MacDiarmidson. A strange smile filled her attractive face as she pushed through a crowd of midday shoppers, oblivious to the feelings of those around her for she was already formulating a plan.

Lily turned and looked into a face open with concern and perhaps even interest. His look said 'speak' but she did not know what to say.

"Why?" Was all Pherein could ask, his face filling with a strange look the woman couldn't discern. Suddenly, as if a cloud lifted, she knew.

Lily dropped her head to avoid the fighter's now intense stare. "I am not sure. I was wrong, I know that. That is not who I am, truly," she emphasized. Then taking a deep breath to try to calm her beating heart blurted out, "I was just scared of the strength of my feelings."

Pherein tilted his head looking at her intently, as if assessing the validity of what she'd just said. It was obvious the big warrior was considering what had been just shared. "I saved your life."

"Yes, but it is more than that," Lily whispered. "I was confused by my feelings at first and that led to my foolish decision. I've also known no other way. But…but it is more, I swear it is."

"Then what is it?" Pherein asked, in the same hushed tone, leaning closer in to the woman.

"Truly, I am not certain," the blonde-haired woman declared, sun glinting off her brass nose hoop, tears filling her eyes, "But if you were willing, I would like to find out."

Pherein was shaken by the declaration but strangely respected the honesty of it, something that he knew was lacking in his life of late. He wasn't sure how to answer.

"Would you please come to dinner tonight?" Lily asked, showing where her feelings were. Then, as if fearing rejection added, "Besides, Molly would love to see you again."

Pherein chuckled. "How can I reject such as offer?" Then the Delorgan became serious. "It would be my honor to come. Perhaps we will have the opportunity to get to know each other better."