AU: Samantha O'Neill reminisces on how things might have been different for her 37th birthday if not for a certain event.
Part of my Lost and Found universe. One-shot for Sam Carter's birthday. Happy Birthday Sam!
Disclaimer: All Stargate SG-1 characters belong to MGM and Amazon. I am just borrowing them for a little while, but I'll give them back. I promise!
An Alternate Birthday
Walking down the hallway and I wasn't surprised to find Jack holding our daughter in the crook of one arm, his other hand reaching out to relieve me of the bottle of freshly pumped milk.
"I swear I just put her down to sleep." My tone voice of indicating playful admonishment.
"She woke up." He replied sporting a massive grin which told me that she did nothing of the sort and he just wanted to hold his new baby girl. I couldn't blame him, having been the same with Gracie. I had not known him as a father with Grace, but I inherently knew that my Jack would have been exactly the same. One of his intrinsic qualities screamed 'Daddy'.
"Sure, she did, Jack." I mocked playfully, picking up my just poured glass of red wine and taking a tentative first sip. Tonight would be my first alcoholic drink in, err… ages really. After Jack died and my whirlwind visit to this reality, I went off the rails a little, seeking to drown my sorrows physically and metaphorically. Until I found out about Gracie. After nearly two years of pregnancy and breastfeeding, then watching Gracie grow, I never felt the need to imbibe, even socially. Wow. Nearly six years. I'd have to watch I didn't get silly.
"C'mon Birthday Girl, come and join your adoring fans." My husband said with a tilt of his head and that smile. The one that made me giddy like a teenager. Gosh. My face flushed and a sack full of butterflies erupted in my stomach. Pulling my lip between my teeth and smiling as I walked past him hearing his muffled groan on the way. Oh yes, I would so have to watch my alcoholic intake and any other eccentric desires, or I'd be begging him for more coffee table action despite only being a little over two weeks since welcoming Sami into the world. What could I say, my husband was hot, and I been without longer than I'd been with him. Those tables had to turn, and they would once I had waited the requisite time recommended – and not a day longer.
"SAM! What took you sooo long? Happy Birthday!" Cassie almost squealed mid launch collecting me in a massive hug on the first step down into the living room. The fire was crackling behind its tempered glass screen filling the room with much needed warmth despite there being a full room of people and a dog.
"Whoa Cass, take it easy." Janet admonished her from the other side of the room.
"It's OK, Janet." I responded. Janet half smiled and took a sip of her drink. She still hadn't warmed up to me entirely despite having been my share care physician throughout Sami's pregnancy and birth. She had been cordial and polite, but not very friendly. If Sami had been my blood daughter, I doubted they have let me give birth at the SGC. Something about the Naquadah in Sam's blood and wondering if it transferred to the foetus. All tests had come back as negative as of last week, and I hadn't seen Janet since.
"Felicitations on the day of your birth, Samantha O'Neill." Teal'c said in his roundabout way. "May you have numerous favourable come backs." He continued making Jack laugh out loud.
"It's 'many happy returns', Teal'c." He corrected from his place on the lounge, Sami happily sucking down her bottle despite it being an hour earlier than normal. I had determined that this was some sort of a thing between the members of SG-1. Teal'c unnaturally elongating terms of endearment and Jack correcting him. Well, except for 'undomesticated equines', that one had become a commonality for SG-1 and even most others at the SGC.
"Happy Birthday Sam." Daniel said with a smile and a kiss on my cheek followed by a squeezy hug that threatened to cut my oxygen off.
"Thanks guys." I replied to both of them with a smile that displayed true happiness.
Looking around from my husband cooing at our newest addition while talking to Cassie, Daniel who had moved over to talk to Janet, Teal'c ruffling the ears of Buddy who laid on the floor content with his attentions then finally to my oldest – my miracle, my salvation – who was playing Super Mario Cart alongside her Uncle Charlie, hers arms flying wilding around the room since – like most small children – the use of ones arms with the controller provided much needed assistance with steering, jumping and attacking on these types of games.
I couldn't believe it had been nearly a year since I came through the mirror unsure of whether I'd be welcomed, shunned, or shunted back home once again. Truthfully, Jack had come around much quicker than I was expecting. After losing the one person who meant the world to him after only a few short weeks of experiencing the kind of love I knew my counterpart harboured for him for years. An experience he never would have had if not for a freak accident that hurtled an older version of her into his life. Whatever happened in those days before she sequestered herself away, had been fundamental enough for him to throw the rule book away.
Ripples into waves. A tsunami really.
She was not entirely the same as the Sam I had spent years talking to, that was clear enough. Something somewhere in her life had happened to make everything go awry and I could not help but think that if she had not appeared when she did then my life would have turned out very differently.
My wave would have crashed on a different beach, maybe one not as forgiving.
She had been jaded, hard, and a little off kilter around Grace, but I would be lying if I said that I would not miss her. Especially after her actions – and what she sacrificed – to get Jack home. She really was the tsunami that washed away all the doubts about getting him much needed assistance.
Some simple questions.
What if Anubis did not die? Who would save us the next time?
What if we found the Lost City? Who would help us access its secrets?
Of course, they had tried to leverage Gracie. Not the Air Force. Uncle George made sure that any consent was required to be given by both Jack and I when he pulled the strings to allow us to stay. A safety net. Unfortunately, there were others that were less scrupulous, as we discovered.
A sudden squeal pulled me out of my musings.
"Hey! That's not fair Uncle Charlie! You cheated!" Grace grumbled loudly as she swerved her Mario cart to collect some extra coins before flailing her arms to the left to turn a corner coming in to sit behind Charlie's Luigi cart.
"I did not. There was a road there." Charlie argued back in his good-natured way. Gracie had come back around after Jack came home. The whole time he was away, she had been standoffish with Charlie, snarky even – especially if he turned up to visit without the other members of SG-1. It's as if she sensed my nervous apprehension because never once did Charlie ever act or speak in any way that suggested he wanted more from me than friendship. I knew I had hurt him five years ago, and for that, I was truly sorry. He had taken Jack's request to take care of us very seriously.
"There was a fence blocking the road." She exclaimed, elbowing him as she turned right.
"So, what? Fences can be broken." He replied, then turned a cheeky grin back to the room when she arced up about fences keeping things out of places – her tirade almost matching Jack's explanation of why Cheyenne Mountain had fences around its perimeter.
"They are for keeping some things in as well Gracie." Her father responded as he reluctantly passed our daughter over to an eager Cassandra who took a seat in a single chair close to the fireplace.
"Like what?" She asked without turning to look at him.
"Cavemen." He replied, then added when I nudged his shoulder, "And women. Cavewomen." I rolled my eyes. I didn't mean for him to elaborate. He really should not tell that story.
"What?" This time she did turn around, giving her Uncle Charlie an opportunity to break a few more fences.
"Nothing. Your father is telling porkies." I answered quickly giving him my feigned unamused glare suddenly wishing that I had not told him about how my Jack and I managed to make it top side during the caveman virus epidemic. His happy ending in the elevator had not been the end of that little adventure. An adventure I had no intention of explaining to my four-year-old daughter. After all, I had to get the closet idea from somebody. It just happened to be his counterpart, though it had still taken him a few months to ask me out on an official date after that.
"I am not." He countermanded immediately, so I smacked his shoulder. "What? Dear." He said with a smile before wrapping his arms around my waist and dragging me into his lap. "Your version is so much better than mine." He whispered, making me flush bright red. By now everyone was looking at us.
"Uncle Jack, unless you are going to give me another little cousin, I don't want to hear about you guys having sex." Cass admonished, her eyes still on Sami.
"What's sex?" Gracie asked with all the innocence of a child in a room full of people. Cassie snickered, Janet and Daniel nearly spat up their drinks, Charlie paused the game and Teal'c turned a knowing look to Jack and me.
"Do you want to field this one, Angel?" Jack asked me with another squeeze of his arms around my middle.
"Me?" I squeaked, "You started it!"
"She's your daughter." He replied with a massive smile. Oh, so that was the route he was taking despite him being equally vigorous in her conception. Well, two could play at that game.
"It's my birthday. I reserve the right palm it off to you. Daddy." I came back with a covert wriggle and grind in his lap making him tighten his arms in a lame attempt to stop my movement. As raring to go as he was after a couple of weeks of post-partum sex drought, I could tell immediately that my movement had the desired effect.
Score.
The sound of short sharp clapping filled the room. "Cake. Let's have cake." Janet announced then dragged Daniel and Charlie out of the room to assist.
"Yesss! Cake!" An excited Gracie added, then jumped up and followed ready to provide her valuable input. As I went to stand, Jack's arms tightened.
"Oh, you aren't going anywhere." He growled softly in my ear and a slight press of his hips into my backside.
"Guys, pleeeezzz." Cassie complained making us both snicker at her extreme teenager-centric attitude towards adults getting lucky just as the three-and-a-half-person cake crew returned. Daniel carrying the cake, and Janet carrying Grace who was rubbing her eye.
Gracie started the birthday song and soon everyone, including Jack, was singing their way through the age-old familiar song celebrating a person getting older. Looking around at each member of my family, new and old, as the song played out, I realised once again how very lucky I was. How going forward my birthdays would see me surrounded by people who I loved and loved me in return instead of being small – almost sad – affairs with just Gracie, myself, and a picture of Jack.
"You better blow those out." Jack interrupted my thoughts.
"Yeah, OK." I replied, wiping the just shed tears from my eyes before leaning forward and – with Gracie's help – blowing out 37 candles.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Everyone yelled, rousing Sami from her sleep with a sudden squall that died down to sleepy snores as soon as Cassie placed her into the crook of Jack's free arm, the other still wrapped around me.
Looking up, he placed a kiss on my nose then looked to Gracie and back to Sami. "Sorry I didn't manage to get to the shops before today. I promise I'll get you something before the week is out." Looking into his amazing brown eyes, I smiled and ran my hand down his cheek then glanced at my two beautiful daughters. I had the perfect thing in mind.
"I think I'd like a little boy."