Sakura was left alone in their house. And everywhere it felt cold. It felt cold in the living room, in the kitchen, in the bathroom, in their bedroom. Everything is cold to her.
And then she realized, it's not the house that was cold. It was her. Nothing is left for her. She lost her baby, now she is losing Kakashi.
The only reason why she can't face him is because she always remembers the life that she lost. She is not mad at Kakashi, she's mad at herself. For being careless, for being useless. And she pushed him away because she felt like she doesn't deserve his kindness. But now she needs it.
Sakura sat on the couch, surrounded by the haunting silence of their home. Her tears continued to flow as she replayed the painful memories of the mission in her mind. The weight of loss pressed heavily on her chest, and the realization that she had kept this from Kakashi only intensified her grief.
As the minutes passed, Sakura found herself succumbing to a suffocating loneliness. She missed Kakashi, but the fear of his rejection paralyzed her. She knew she had to talk to him, to explain, but the words seemed to elude her. The pain was too raw, and the guilt too overwhelming.
She didn't realize that she fell asleep.
When she woke up, the sun is shining bright on the horizon. But she is still cold. The house is still cold. And there's no Kakashi anywhere. She felt her tears pool in her eyes again.
Sakura wiped away the tears, mustering the strength to find Kakashi and face the consequences of her silence. She searched the village, checking all the places he might be, but there was no sign of him. Anxiety gnawed at her as she wondered where he could have gone.
"Did he? Is he going to leave me now?" she thought. And panic started to rise on her chest. Her heart pounding painfully, and she found herself on the floor, on all fours.
The panic and pain overwhelmed Sakura as she knelt on the floor, the weight of her actions and the fear of losing Kakashi crashing down on her. The realization that he might leave her, unable to cope with the tragedy they faced, tore at her heart.
Desperation fueled her actions as she rushed to find him. She checked the places that held significance in their relationship—the training grounds, the memorial stone, and even the place where they shared their first kiss. But Kakashi remained elusive.
And so she searched for him. Searched for him everywhere, not caring how she looks like to others. Her only purpose is to find him. But hours passed and she still haven't seen him. The townspeople are now gawking at her, whispering. But she didn't care. She has to find him. She has to find Kakashi.
"Hey, Sakura-chan where are you going?" A man held her wrist and was asking her. She didn't know who it was or how many hours had passed since she started looking for Kakashi. But the sun is still shining brightly. It could have been just an hour or so.
She didn't answer the person who was brave enough to interrupt her. She just wrestled her wrist out of his grasp and continued walking looking for Kakashi.
"Sakura!" the man, called after her. But she didn't care. There's only one name that matters to her now.
Kakashi. Kakashi. Kakashi.
She needs to find Kakashi.
The man stared at her when she didn't even bother to look back. He took a deep breath and decided to follow her, she must be out of her mind because she looks like a mess. Her long pink hair is tangled, her eyes are red-rimmed, her cheeks blotchy, her clothes dirty and crumpled, and she wears no shoes. She had been walking around town barefoot and from what he can see, her feet are already bloody.
The man caught up with Sakura, gently placing a hand on her shoulder to get her attention. "Sakura, what's going on? Why are you looking for Kakashi like this?"
But Sakura didn't answer him. She just needs to find him. One look at his face and she knows she will be alright. But the nagging pain and grief continues to crush her. And she can't do anything except cry and mutter his name.
The man continued to follow Sakura, growing increasingly worried about her well-being. He couldn't understand what had happened but seeing her in such a distressed state raised his concerns. He gently tried to guide her towards a quieter place, away from the prying eyes of the villagers.
"Sakura, please, talk to me. What happened with Kakashi? Why are you so desperate to find him?" he asked, his voice filled with genuine concern.
But Sakura remained unresponsive, and just walked past him. It was like she had shut off the world. She continued traversing the streets and looked for him everywhere and failing to find him.
And it was the straw that finally broke Sakura's back.