This chapter and the upcoming "Moth" chapter are the reasons why I even wrote this toothache of a story lol big thanks and lots of love to Paige and May for prereading! :3
20
I stay in bed after Edward leaves, dozing on and off for a couple of hours.
When I finally wake up it's close to noon, which makes me feel like a lazy brat, but I also feel more alive. Ibuprofen and a shower help me feel more human, too, and by the time I'm dressed and ready for my mom's Christmas Eve party, I'm feeling good and excited to introduce my boyfriend to my family.
Edward shows up at my apartment around 4, and when I open the front door, I come face to face with a bare Christmas tree.
He peeks his head out from behind it.
"Ho ho ho," he says with a sweet grin.
"I take offense to that. I'm only a ho for you." He laughs at my non-joke. "What do you think you're doing, Cullen?"
"Righting a wrong. This tree belongs here, with you. Not at my place."
I open the door wider to let him in, taking the stand from him while he carries the tree with ease. It takes him a minute to get it all set up, but once he does, even having the bare tree in the corner of my living room brings a spark of festivity I was sorely missing.
"The ornaments and lights are in my car, but we can decorate it later tonight when we get back if you want," he says.
"You're the best." I stand on my tiptoes to hug him. "Is this my Christmas present?"
"Nope."
When we pull apart, I admire him. In dark denim and a maroon and black check flannel under his open wool coat, he looks so damn good.
"God, my boyfriend is one sexy motherfucker," I muse, and he moves his hands to my waist and kisses me.
"You look pretty," he whispers, eyeing my burgundy sweater dress.
"Thank you."
"You also look much less green than you did this morning."
"I was just channeling my inner Grinch earlier," I insist. "I went back to sleep after you left, so that helped."
"That sounds nice."
"Would've been better with you here… although I don't think we would've gotten much rest." A small smirk graces his lips at my likely accurate assumption. "I want to give you your present before we go to my mom's."
"I don't think we have time for that…" he says, sounding wistful even though his eyes spark with want.
I laugh. "Not the gift of sex. An actual gift."
"Ahh. You didn't have to get me anything."
"Shush. I wanted to." I move toward the couch and he follows, sitting next to me as I hand him the wrapped box that was on the coffee table. "Merry Christmas," I say softly.
Taking the gift from me, he unwraps it to find a cardboard box. His eyes cut to me before opening it, and nestled inside he finds a classic Santa nutcracker.
"It's a Christian Ulbricht nutcracker. The real deal, handcrafted in Germany," I tell him as he picks it up from the box. "They sell them at Williams Sonoma, so when I went shopping with my mom and sister on Sunday, I couldn't resist."
He admires it, but his face is unreadable. "Swan…"
"What? Is it stupid? You don't like it?"
"I Googled them the other night after you told me about them. They're a lot of money."
"So? Consider it an investment in us. I figured you—we—could start a collection like my mom did. And maybe that's presumptuous, and I know you're not that into decorating but…" I grab it from his hands and make the mouth move to show him how it works. "It actually does crack nuts, so if you want to think of it more as a practical gift," I ramble. "Not that you crack your own nuts. But if you wanted to you could, and options are nice, so—"
Thankfully, he cuts off my rambling with a kiss.
A deep, long kiss.
"I fucking love it," he whispers. "And I love you, Bella."
"All it took was giving you a nutcracker for you to finally admit it?"
Tender affection flashes over his face. "Guess so."
"I love you, too."
He eyes the nutcracker. "Was that your admission or his? Because you made the lever move while you said it."
I shake my head to snap out of it and set it back in the box. "It was my admission," I confess. "I just did that because I'm nervous."
"Why?"
"Because… because I love you, too," I say again softer, just me, no nutcracker to hide behind. "I'm so in love with you, it's stupid."
He grabs me to sit on his lap. "It's not stupid. It's pretty fucking amazing if you ask me."
I wrap my arms around his shoulders and neck. "So, last week, when you said you guarantee someone has fallen in love with me…"
"I was talking about myself," he says honestly. "I've been hiding behind banter and flirtation because I wasn't sure how you felt."
I smile. "So, when did you know?"
He thinks about this. "I don't think there was one occurrence. Just a series of everyday moments with you that left me wanting more. But I will say I fell for you even more that night at your apartment when—"
"I went down on you?" I interrupt, but he laughs, not letting my crass, one-track mind ruin the moment.
"I can't lie and say that didn't make me want you even more than I already do," he admits. "But I was gonna say when you let me read your book. When you trusted me, opened up to me like that. It felt fucking good Like… we're building something real."
My eyes sting with happy tears and I soak up his sincerity. "'Cause we are building something real."
"I know. What you just said about the nutcracker, making a collection of our own, just… yeah. It shows me you're thinking long-term, too, and solidifies everything I fucking feel for you." He captures my mouth in a soft, soft kiss.
"I love you. I love you. I love you," I chant. "Finally. No more trying not to slip up and say what was dying to burst out of me."
He laughs. "No more trying to play it cool with each other. We can say and do whatever we feel. Deal?"
"Deal. Less cool, more fool," I agree. "So… wanna get married and have babies?" I boldly tease. Another laugh escapes from him. It's deep and turns into a sexy, satisfied sigh, his eyes sparking with delight. "Fine. I get it. Too soon."
He cups my face and kisses me hard, murmuring, "One day."
XXX
On the way to my mom's, I realize Edward is driving there without the help of Google Maps.
"You don't need the address?" I ask, staring out the window as the sky grows darker, Christmas lights blurring by.
"You think I forgot where Candy Cane Lane is?" he asks rhetorically, tossing a smug smirk my way when I look at him. "I told you. Big fan."
"We're gonna have to park around the block since we can't park on the street," I say, already knowing cars are idling down the road to admire the lights. "But that'll be fun because we can walk through together and look at everything before we get to my mom's near the end."
He reaches over to place a palm on my thigh while he drives. "Sounds good."
When we get closer to the neighborhood, I point out where Edward can park. There are already groups of families bundled up and walking toward the start of the display that's around the corner.
As Edward and I get out of his car, I'm hit with a wave of nostalgia.
I think about the first year this started and how much it's grown since then. Not the first year my dad started decorating, but the year when every house on the curved road joined in. No one expected it to turn into a tradition, but I love that it's continued even though my dad is no longer a part of it.
I'm quiet, and Edward takes my hand.
"So, five years ago Mr. Newton sold his house," I start to tell him as we walk past houses that aren't involved in the display.
"Who's that?" he asks, indulging me in this story.
"He lived a few houses down from my mom. But I remember hearing that he was rigorous with who he sold to. He made sure to inform those interested in buying about Candy Cane Lane. Like, if they didn't seem excited or agree to decorate, he wouldn't sell to them. In the end, he accepted a buyer who offered less money, but who agreed in writing to continue the Christmas light tradition," I recall.
"Really?"
I chuckle. "Yeah. It might seem like a silly stipulation."
"No, it doesn't. That's pretty damn special," Edward says softly, just as we get the street I grew up on. There's a handmade wooden sign that says Candy Cane Lane, indicating the start. It feels like a lifetime ago that I helped paint the sign with other neighborhood kids.
"Welcome to Candy Cane Lane," I announce, and Edward kisses my cheek.
"Feels good to be back," he says like the sweet man he is.
"I wish the snow we got last week didn't melt. It'd make it so much more festive," I remark wistfully.
"Yeah, it would."
We take our time walking down the street, hand in hand, admiring the lights on every house. Even though we're surrounded by idling cars and other people passing by on the sidewalk, it feels like it's just us here.
"Damn, some of the neighbors upped their game this year," I realize, and Edward just hums softly. It's not that they slacked off after my dad passed away, but there was a definite spark missing. Or maybe that was just something I felt.
We near the bend of the road, approaching my mom's house. I already know when we round the corner and see it, it's going to be dark on the outside, free of festivity. So I stay quiet, focusing on the Christmas music I hear playing from somewhere nearby.
"Are you nervous?" Edward asks me, trying to decipher my silence.
"No. It's always just a little sad coming back this time of year," I admit.
"I know," he says softly.
I try to keep the mood light.
"Are you nervous? You're about to meet all of my extended family and they're a rowdy bunch. I hope you're ready to get lit like a Christmas tree."
He smiles. "I'm not nervous. I'm ready."
"Good. They—"
I fall silent and pause in place when I finally see my mom's house up ahead.
It takes a second for me to understand what I'm seeing, and I cover my mouth in surprise, emotion bubbling up inside of me.
It's decorated.
All lit up.
And there's snow in the yard.
Real snow.
The way my dad used to do.
I shake my head, tears burning my eyes, the lights all around me blurring like a halo effect.
When I glance over at Edward, he doesn't look the least bit surprised to see the house decorated.
"Edward," I choke out, dropping my hand from my mouth. "Did you… did you do this?"
His gaze is tender as he touches the small of my back. "Yes."
"Why?" I sniffle, wiping my eyes.
"Because I love you," he says simply. "I wanted you to have a little piece of your dad this season. Merry Christmas, Bella."
"This is my gift?"
He nods, sliding his hand up my spine and giving the back of my neck a gentle squeeze. My throat tightens with emotion and I turn into him for a hug.
He holds me, hugging me back.
"Thank you," I whisper. "Thank you. This is the best present anyone has ever given me."
With a kiss on my temple, we break apart and move toward the house. Now that the shock has passed, I'm excited to see everything.
It's even more over the top than my dad used to do. White lights cover most of the house. LED candy canes line the driveway and sidewalk. Inflatables grace the snowy yard. Every tree is wrapped and twinkling. Synchronized music plays as certain parts of the house light up. Santa and his reindeer are on the roof. There's even a large sleigh in the driveway, and people are climbing in to have their picture taken.
It's a Christmas wonderland.
"How the hell did you pull this off?" I ask in awe, taking in the intricate display.
"Well… I had some help," Edward says, amused.
"Who?"
"My elves," he teases, and I grin. "Jasper, Alice, and a lot of your neighbors helped. Remember last week when we showed up at your place and Alice and Jasper were there? When you and Alice left the room to talk, I told Jasper what I wanted to do. He was game and we exchanged numbers. He gave me Alice's, too. The next night, I called your sister and asked her to check with your mom if doing this was okay. I didn't want to overstep, but they both loved the idea and knew you would, too."
"You perfect, sneaky man. And where'd this come from?" I ask, stepping into the snow.
He grins. "I know a guy."
"A snow guy," I deadpan.
"Your neighbor put me in touch with the company your dad always used. He must have had a good relationship with them because when I gave them your mom's address, they insisted on doing this for free, as a way to honor him," he explains, and hearing that makes my throat tighten a little. "Alice took me to the storage unit Monday night, and I've come here every day after work to put it all together."
It makes sense now why Alice said she knew Edward loved me, and why she and my family are so taken with him. They didn't just meet once last week. They've been getting to know him every day since then, and have witnessed how much he cares for me by doing this.
"Wait, so that's why you said you were going to be busy after work and couldn't hang out until after Christmas?" I realize.
With a nod, he says, "Yeah. I hate that I hurt you with the whole manuscript thing, but your asking for space helped, too, so you weren't too curious about where I was. Also, there was no hockey game last night. I had to come here to finish up. And this morning when I had to leave you in bed, I had to come here for the snow delivery and finish setting up the yard."
My heart bursts and swells. I press myself flush against him and grab the lapels of his wool coat, staring up at him.
"I love you. And I can't believe you," I murmur. "You just screwed yourself for years to come. How can you top this?"
He laughs, eyes twinkling. "I have some ideas."
Dipping his head, we kiss.
The front door opens and my mom, Alice, and Jasper all come out.
My mom's already crying, which makes me tear up again. When we hug, she whispers in my ear that Edward is a keeper, and I just smile because I couldn't agree more.
The five of us all take turns hugging and greeting each other before we admire the glowing, insanely festive house.
"It's perfect, isn't it?" my mom softly asks. "It's almost like…" She squeezes my hand and doesn't finish her sentence, but she doesn't have to because I already know.
For the first Christmas in eight years, it finally feels like my dad is here with us again.